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Bleak House by Charles Dickens Chapter 54. Springing a mine.
Refreshed by sleep, Mr. Bucket rises at times in the morning and prepares for a field day.
Smartened up by the aid of a clean shirt and a wet hairbrush with which instrument on occasions
of ceremony, he lubricates such thin locks as remained to him after his life of severe study.
Mr. Bucket lays in a breakfast of two mutton chops as a foundation to work upon,
together with tea, eggs, toast, and marmalade on a corresponding scale.
Having much enjoyed these strengthening matters and having held subtle conference
with his familiar demon, he confidently instructs Mercury just to mention quietly to Sir Leicester
deadlock baronet that whenever he's ready for me, I'm ready for him. A gracious message,
being returned, that Sir Leicester will expedite his dressing and join Mr. Bucket in the library
within ten minutes. Mr. Bucket repairs to that apartment and stands before the fire with his
finger on his chin, looking at the blazing coals. Thoughtful Mr. Bucket is, as a man may be with
weighty work to do, but composed, sure, confident. From the expression of his face, he might be a famous
whisper-player for a large steak, say a hundred guineas certain, with the game in his hand,
but with a high reputation involved in his playing his hand out to the last guard in a masterly way.
Not in the least anxious or disturbed is Mr. Bucket, when Sir Leicester appears,
but he eyes the baronet aside as he comes slowly to his easy chair, with that observant gravity of
yesterday, in which there might have been yesterday, but for the audacity of his idea, a touch of
compassion. I am sorry to have kept you waiting, officer, but I am rather later than my usual hour
this morning. I am not well. The agitation and the indignation from which I have recently suffered
have been too much for me. I am subject to gout. Sir Leicester was going to say in disposition and
would have said it to anybody else, but Mr. Bucket palpably knows all about it, and recent circumstances
have brought it on. As he takes his seat with some difficulty and with an air of pain, Mr. Bucket
draws a little nearer, standing with one of his large hands on the library table. I am not aware
officer Sir Leicester observes, raising his eyes to his face, whether you wish us to be alone,
but that is entirely as you please. If you do well and good, if not, Mr. Deadlock would be interested.
Why? Sir Leicester Deadlock baronet returns Mr. Bucket with his head persuasively on one side,
and his forefinger pendant at one ear like an earring. We can't be too private, just at present.
You will presently see that we can't be too private. A lady under the circumstances and especially
in Mr. Deadlock's elevated station of society can't but be agreeable to me. But speaking without
a view to myself, I will take the liberty of assuring you that I know we can't be too private.
That is enough. So much so, Sir Leicester Deadlock baronet, Mr. Bucket resumes,
that I was on the point of asking your permission to turn the key in the door.
By all means, Mr. Bucket's skillfully and softly takes that precaution,
stooping on his knee for a moment, from mere force of habit, so to adjust the key in the lock
as that no one shall peep in from the outside. Sir Leicester Deadlock baronet,
I mentioned yesterday evening that I wanted but a very little to complete this case.
I have now completed it and collected proof against the person who did this crime.
Against the soldier? No, Sir Leicester Deadlock, not the soldier.
Sir Leicester looks astounded and inquires, is the man in custody?
Mr. Bucket tells him after a pause. It was a woman.
Sir Leicester leans back in his chair and breathlessly ejaculates. Good heaven.
Now Sir Leicester Deadlock baronet, Mr. Bucket begins standing over him with one hand,
spread out on the library table and the forefinger of the other in impressive use.
It's my duty to prepare you for a train of circumstances that may, and I go so far as to say
that will give you a shock. But Sir Leicester Deadlock baronet, you are a gentleman,
and I know what a gentleman is and what a gentleman is capable of. A gentleman
can bear a shock when it must come boldly and steadily. A gentleman can make up his mind
to stand up against almost any blow. Why take yourself, Sir Leicester Deadlock baronet?
If there's a blow to be inflicted on you, you naturally think of your family.
You ask yourself, how would all the ancestors of yours, away to Julius Caesar,
not to go beyond him at present, have borne that blow. You remember scores of them
that would have borne it well, and you bear it well on their accounts and to maintain the
family credit. That's the way you argue, and that's the way you act, Sir Leicester Deadlock baronet.
Sir Leicester leaning back in his chair and grasping the elbows, sits looking at him with a
stony face. Now, Sir Leicester Deadlock proceeds Mr. Bucket, thus preparing you, let me beg of you
not to trouble your mind for a moment as to anything having come to my knowledge. I know so much
about so many characters high and low that a piece of information, more or less, don't signify a
straw. I don't suppose there's a move on the board that would surprise me, and as to this or that
move, having taken place, why my knowing it is no odds at all, any possible move, whatever,
provided it's in a wrong direction. Being a probable move according to my experience.
Therefore, what I say to you, Sir Leicester Deadlock baronet is, don't you go and let yourself be put
out of the way because of my knowing anything of your family affairs. I thank you for your
preparation, return Sir Leicester after a silence, without moving hand, foot or feature,
which I hope is not necessary, though I give it credit for being well intended. Be so good as to
go on. Also, Sir Leicester seems to shrink in the shadow of his figure, also to take a seat if
you have no objection. None at all, Mr. Bucket brings a chair and diminishes his shadow.
Now Sir Leicester Deadlock baronet, with this short preface I come to the point, Lady Deadlock.
Sir Leicester raises himself in his seat and stares at him fiercely. Mr. Bucket brings the
finger into play as an emollient. Lady Deadlock, you see, she's universally admired.
That's what her lady ship is. She's universally admired, says Mr. Bucket.
I would greatly prefer Officer Sir Leicester returns stiffly. My lady's name being entirely
omitted from this discussion. So would I Sir Leicester Deadlock baronet, but it's impossible.
Impossible? Mr. Bucket shakes his relentless head. Sir Leicester Deadlock baronet, it's all
together impossible. What I have got to say is about her lady ship. She is the pivot it all turns
on. Officer retorts Sir Leicester with a fiery eye and a quivering lip. You know your duty,
do your duty, but be careful not to overstep it. I would not suffer it. I would not endure it.
You bring up my lady's name into this communication upon your responsibility, upon your
responsibility. My lady's name is not a name for common persons to trifle with.
Sir Leicester Deadlock baronet, I say what I must say and no more. I hope it may prove so.
Very well, go on, go on, sir. Glancing at the angry eyes which now avoid him and at the angry
figure trembling from head to foot, yet striving to be still, Mr. Bucket feels his way with his
forefinger and in a low voice proceeds. Sir Leicester Deadlock baronet, it becomes my duty to tell
you that the deceased Mr. Tolkien horn long entertained mistrusts and suspicions of Lady Deadlock.
If he had dared to breathe them to me, sir, which he never did, I would have killed him myself
exclaim, Sir Leicester striking his hand upon the table. But in the very heat and fury of the act,
he stops, fixed by the knowing eyes of Mr. Bucket, whose forefinger is slowly going and who,
with mingled confidence and patience, shakes his head.
Sir Leicester Deadlock, the deceased Mr. Tolkien horn was deep and close. What he fully had in his mind
in the very beginning, I can't quite take upon myself to say. But I know from his lips that he
long ago suspected Lady Deadlock of having discovered through the sight of some handwriting
in this very house, and when you, yourself, Sir Leicester Deadlock were present, the existence
in great poverty of a certain person who had been her lover before you quoted her and who ought
to have been her husband. Mr. Bucket stops and deliberately repeats, ought to have been her husband,
not a doubt about it. I know from his lips that when that person soon afterwards died,
he suspected Lady Deadlock of visiting his wretched lodging and his wretched grave alone and in secret.
I know from my own inquiries and through my eyes and ears that Lady Deadlock did make such a visit
in the dress of her own maid, for the deceased Mr. Tolkien horn employed me to reckon up her
lady ship. If you'll excuse my making use of the term we commonly employ, and I reckoned her up
so far completely, I confronted the maid in the chambers of Lincoln's infields with a witness
who had been Lady Deadlock's guide, and there couldn't be the shadow of a doubt that she had worn
the young woman's dress unknown to her. Sir Leicester Deadlock Baronet, I did endeavour to
pave the way a little towards these unpleasant disclosures yesterday by saying that very strange
things happened even in high families sometimes. All this and more has happened in your own family,
and to and through your own Lady. It's my belief that the deceased Mr. Tolkien horn
followed up these inquiries to the hour of his death and that he and Lady Deadlock even had bad
blood between them upon the matter that very night. Now only you put that to Lady Deadlock,
Sir Leicester Deadlock, Baronet, and asked her lady ship weather, even after he had left here,
she didn't go down to his chambers with the intention of saying something further to him,
dressed in a loose black mantle with a deep fringe to it.
Sir Leicester Deadlock sits like a statue gazing at the cruel finger that is probing the life
blood of his heart. You put that to her lady ship, Sir Leicester Deadlock, Baronet, from me,
Inspector Bucket of the Detective, and if her lady ship makes any difficulty about admitting of it,
you tell her that it's no use, that Inspector Bucket knows it, and knows that she passed the
soldier as you called him, though he's not in the army now, and knows that she knows she passed him
on the staircase. Now Sir Leicester Deadlock, Baronet, why do I relate all this?
Sir Leicester, who has covered his face with his hands, uttering a single groan,
requests him to pause for a moment. By and by, he takes his hands away, and so preserves his dignity
and outward calmness, though there is no more color in his face than in his white hair,
that Mr. Bucket is a little odd by him. Something frozen and fixed is upon his manner,
over and above its usual shell of haughtiness, and Mr. Bucket soon detects an unusual
slowness in his speech, with now and then a curious trouble in beginning, which occasions him to
utter inarticulate sounds. With such sounds, he now breaks silence, soon however, controlling himself
to say, that he does not comprehend why a gentleman so faithful and zealous as the late Mr. Talkinghorn
should have communicated to him nothing of this painful, this distressing, this unlocked for,
this overwhelming, this incredible intelligence. Again, Sir Leicester Deadlock, Baronet returns Mr.
Bucket, put it to her lady ship to clear that up, put it to her lady ship if you think it right
from Inspector Bucket of the detective. You'll find, or I'm much mistaken, that the deceased
Mr. Talkinghorn had the intention of communicating the whole to you, as soon as he considered it ripe,
and further that he had given her lady ship so to understand. Why, he might have been going to reveal
it the very morning when I examine the body. You don't know what I'm going to say and do,
five minutes from this present time Sir Leicester Deadlock, Baronet, and supposing I was to be picked
off now, you might wonder why I hadn't done it, don't you see?
True, Sir Leicester avoiding, with some trouble, those obtrusive sounds, says true. At this juncture,
a considerable noise of voices is heard in the hall. Mr. Bucket, after listening, goes to the library
door, softly unlocks and opens it and listens again. Then he draws in his head and whispers hurriedly,
but composedly. Sir Leicester Deadlock, Baronet, this unfortunate family affair has taken air,
as I expected it might, the deceased Mr. Talkinghorn being cut down so sudden, the chance to hush
it is, to let in these people now in a wrangle with your footmen. Would you mind sitting quiet on the
family account while I reckon I'm up, and would you just throw in a nod when I seem to ask you for it?
President Barack Obama. Virginia, we are counting on you. Republicans want to steal enough seats
in Congress to raid the next election and wield unchecked power for two more years, but you can stop
them by voting yes by April 21st. Help put our elections back on a level playing field and let
voters decide not politicians. Vote yes by April 21st. Paid for by Virginians for fair elections.
President Barack Obama. Virginia, we are counting on you. Republicans want to steal enough seats
in Congress to raid the next election and wield unchecked power for two more years, but you can stop
them by voting yes by April 21st. Help put our elections back on a level playing field and let
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Celestir indistinctly answers. Officer, the best you can, the best you can, and Mr. Bucket with a
nod and a sagacious crook of the four fingers slips down into the hall where the voices quickly
die away. He is not long in returning, a few paces ahead of Mercury, and a brother deity also
powdered and impeached blossom smalls, who bear between them a chair in which is an incapable old man,
another man and two women come behind, directing the pitching of the chair in an affable
and easy manner, Mr. Bucket dismisses the Mercury's and locks the door again. Celestir looks on
at this invasion of the sacred precincts with an icy stare. Now perhaps you may know me,
ladies and gentlemen, says Mr. Bucket in a confidential voice. I am Inspector Bucket of the
Detective. I am, and this, producing the tip of his convenient little staff from his breast pocket,
is my authority. Now, you wanted to see Celestir deadlock Baronet? Well, you do see him, and mind you,
it ain't everyone as is admitted to that honor. Your name, old gentleman, is small weed. That's
what your name is. I know it well. Well, and you never heard of any harm of it, Christ, Mr.
Smallweed, in a shrill loud voice. You don't happen to know why they killed the pig, do you,
retorts Mr. Bucket, with a steadfast look but without loss of temper. No, why they killed him,
says Mr. Bucket, on account of his having so much cheek. Don't you get into the same position,
because it isn't worthy of you. You ain't in the habit of conversing with a deaf person, are you?
Yes, snarls, Mr. Smallweed. My wife's deaf. That accounts for you pitching your voice so high,
but as she ain't here, just pitch it on October to lower, will you? And I'll not only be obliged to
you, but it'll do you more credit, says Mr. Bucket. This other gentleman is in the preaching line,
I think. Name of Chadband, Mr. Smallweed puts it, speaking henceforth, in a much lower key.
Once had a friend and brother sergeant of the same name, says Mr. Bucket, offering his hand,
and consequently feel a liking for it. Mrs. Chadband, no doubt. And Mrs. Snacksby, Mr. Smallweed
introduces. Husbands, a law stationer, and a friend of my own, says Mr. Bucket. Love him like a brother.
Now, what's up? Do you mean what business have we come upon, Mr. Smallweed asks, a little dash
by the suddenness of this turn? Ah, you know what I mean. Let us hear what it's all about in the
presence of Sir Leicester Deadlock Baronette. Come. Mr. Smallweed, beckoning Mr. Chadband,
takes a moment's counsel with him in a whisper. Mr. Chadband, expressing a considerable
amount of oil from the pores of his forehead and the palms of his hands, says aloud, yes, you first
and retires to his former place. I was the client and friend of Mr. Tolkien Horn,
pipe's grandfather, Smallweed, then. I did business with him. I was useful to him and he was useful
to me. Crook, dead and gone, was my brother-in-law. He was own brother to a brimstone magpie,
least ways Mrs. Smallweed. I come into Crook's property. I examined all his papers and all his
effects. They were all dug out under my eyes. There was a bundle of letters belonging to a dead
and gone larger, as was hit away at the back of a shelf in the side of Lady Jane's bed,
his cat's bed. He hid all manner of things away everywhere. Mr. Tolkien Horn wanted him and
got him, but I looked him over first. I'm a man of business, and I took a squint at him.
They were letters from the largest sweetheart, and she signed Anoria. Dear me, that's not a common
name. Anoria, is it? There's no lady in this house that signs Anoria, is there? Oh no, I don't
think so. Oh no, I don't think so, and not in the same hand, perhaps. Oh no, I don't think so.
Here Mr. Smallweed seized with a fit of coughing in the midst of his triumph, breaks off to ejaculate.
Oh dear me, oh Lord, I'm shaken all to pieces. Now, when your ready,
says Mr. Bucket, after awaiting his recovery, to come to anything that concerns Sir Leicester
Deadlock Baronette, here the gentleman sits, you know. Haven't I come to it, Mr. Bucket,
Christ grandfather Smallweed? Isn't the gentleman concerned yet? Not with Captain Harden,
and his ever-affection at Anoria, and their child into the bargain? Come then, I want to know
where those letters are. That concerns me, if it don't concern Sir Leicester Deadlock. I will know
where they are, I won't have them disappear so quietly. I hand him over to my friend and solicitor,
Mr. Tolkienhorn, not to anybody else. Why, he paid you for them, you know, and handsome too,
says Mr. Bucket. I don't care for that. I want to know who's got him, and I tell you what we
want, what we all here want, Mr. Bucket. We want more paints taking and search making into this
murder. We know where the interest and the motive was, and you have not done enough,
if George the Vagabondra Goon had any hand in it, he was only an accomplice and was set on.
You know what I mean as well as any man. Now, I'll tell you what, says Mr. Bucket,
instantaneously altering his manner, coming close to him and communicating an extraordinary fascination
to the forefinger. I am damned if I am a going to have my case spoiled, or interfered with,
or anticipated by so much as half a second of time, by any human being in creation. You want more
paint-staking and search-making? You do? Do you see this hand and do you think that I don't know
the right time to stretch it out and put it on the arm that fired that shot? Such is the dread
power of the man, and so terribly evident it is that he makes no idle boast that Mr. Smallweed
begins to apologize. Mr. Bucket dismissing his sudden anger checks him.
The advice I give you is, don't trouble your head about the murder. That's my affair.
You keep half an eye on the newspapers, and I shouldn't wonder if you was to read something
about it before long. If you look sharp. I know my business, and that's all I've got to say
to you on that subject. Now about those letters. You want to know who's got them. I don't mind
telling you. I have got them. Is that the packet? Mr. Smallweed looks with greedy eyes at the little
bundle Mr. Bucket produces from a mysterious part of his coat and identifies it as the same.
What have you got to say next? Ask Mr. Bucket. Now, don't open your mouth too wide,
because you don't look handsome when you do it. I want 500 pounds. No, you don't. You mean 50
says Mr. Bucket humorously. It appears, however, that Mr. Smallweed means 500. That is,
I am deputed by Sir Leicester deadlock Baronette to consider without admitting or promising anything.
This bit of business says Mr. Bucket. Sir Leicester mechanically bows his head,
and you ask me to consider a proposal of 500 pounds? Why, it's an unreasonable proposal.
250 would be bad enough, but better than that. Hadn't you better say 250? Mr. Smallweed is quite
clear that he had better not. Then says Mr. Bucket. Let's hear Mr. Chadband. Lord, many a time I've
heard my old fellow sergeant of that name, and a moderate man he was in all respects as ever I
come across. Thus invited, Mr. Chadband steps forth, and after a little sleek, smiling, and a
little oil grinding with the palms of his hands delivers himself as follows. My friends, we are now
Rachel, my wife, and I, in the mansions of the rich and great. Why are we now in the mansions of
the rich and great, my friends? Is it because we are invited, because we are bitten to feast with
them, because we are bitten to rejoice with them, because we are bitten to play the loot with them,
because we are bitten to dance with them? No. Then why are we here, my friends? Are we in
possession of a sinful secret, and do we require corn and wine and oil, or what is much the same
thing money for the keeping thereof? Probably so, my friends. You're a man of business all you
return, Mr. Bucket, very attentive, and consequently you're going on to mention what the nature of your
secret is. You are right. You couldn't do better. Let us then, my brother, in a spirit of love,
says Mr. Chadband, with a cunning eye, proceed unto it, Rachel, my wife, advance.
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Mrs. Chad Van more than ready so advances us to jostle her husband into the background
and confronts Mr. Bucket with a hard frowning smile. Since you want to know what we know,
says she. I'll tell you, I helped to bring up Miss Harden, her ladyship's daughter.
I was in the service of her ladyship sister who was very sensitive to the disgrace her ladyship
brought upon her and gave out even to her ladyship that the child was dead. She was very nearly so
when she was born, but she's alive and I know her. With these words and a laugh and laying a bitter
stress on the word ladyship, Mrs. Chad Van folds her arms and looks implacably at Mr. Bucket.
I suppose now returns that officer you will be expecting a 20 pound note or a present of about
that figure. Mrs. Chad Van merely laughs and contemptuously tells him he can offer 20 pence.
My friend the law stationers good lady over there says Mr. Debucket luring Mrs. Snags
beforeward with the finger. What may your game be, ma'am? Mrs. Snagsby is at first prevented by
tears and lamentations from stating the nature of her game, but by degrees it confusedly comes to
light that she is a woman overwhelmed with injuries and wrongs, who Mr. Snagsby has abitually
deceived abandoned and sought to keep in darkness, and whose chief comfort under her afflictions
has been the sympathy of the late Mr. Tolkien horn, who showed so much commiseration for her
on one occasion of his calling in Cook's Court in the absence of her perjured husband,
that she has of late habitually carried to him all her woes.
Everybody it appears the present company accepted has plotted against Mrs. Snagsby's peace.
There is Mr. Guppey, clerked to Kenji and Carboy, who was at first as open as the sun at noon,
but who suddenly shut up as close as midnight under the influence no doubt of Mr. Snagsby's suborning
and tampering. There is Mr. Weevil, friend of Mr. Guppey, who lived mysteriously up a court,
owing to the like coherent causes. There was crook deceased, there was Nimrod deceased, and there
was Joe deceased, and they were all in it. In what? Mrs. Snagsby does not with particularity express,
but she knows that Joe was Mr. Snagsby's son, as well as if a trumpet had spoken it,
and she followed Mr. Snagsby when he went on his last visit to the boy, and if he was not his son,
why did he go? The one occupation of her life has been for some time back. To follow Mr. Snagsby to
infrow and up and down, and to piece suspicious circumstances together, and every circumstance that
has happened has been most suspicious, and in this way she has pursued her object of detecting
and confounding her false husband night and day. Thus did it come to pass that she brought the
Chad bands and Mr. Tolkien horn together, and conferred with Mr. Tolkien horn on the change in
Mr. Guppey and helped to turn up the circumstances in which the present company are interested,
casually, by the wayside, being still and ever on the great high road that is to terminate in Mr.
Snagsby's full exposure and a matrimonial separation. All this, Mrs. Snagsby as an injured woman
and friend of Mrs. Chad band, and the follower of Mr. Chan band, and the mourner of the late Mr.
Tolkien horn is here to certify under the seal of confidence, with every possible confusion and
involvement possible and impossible, having no pecuniary motive whatever, and no scheme or project,
but the one mentioned, and bringing here and taking everywhere her own dense atmosphere of dust,
arising from the ceaseless working of her mill of jealousy. While this exhortium is in hand,
and it takes some time, Mr. Bucket, who has seen through the transparency of Mrs. Snagsby's vinegar
at a glance, confers with his familiar demon, and bestows his shrewed attention on the Chad bands
and Mr. Smallweed. Sir Leicester deadlock remains immovable, with the same icy surface upon him,
except that he once or twice looks toward Mr. Bucket as relying on that officer alone of all mankind.
Very good, says Mr. Bucket. Now I understand you, you know, and being deputed by Sir Leicester
deadlock baronet to look into this little matter. Again, Sir Leicester mechanically bows in
confirmation of the statement. Can give it my fair and full attention. Now I won't allude to
conspiring to extort money or anything of that sort, because we are men and women of the world here,
and our object is to make things pleasant. But I tell you what I do wonder at. I am surprised that
you should think of making a noise below in the hall. It was so opposed to your interests. That's
what I look at. We wanted to get in, please, Mr. Smallweed. Why, of course, you wanted to get in,
Mr. Bucket as certs with cheerfulness. But for an old gentleman at your time of life,
what I call truly venerable mind you, with his wits sharpened as I have no doubt they are,
by the loss of the use of his limbs, which occasions all his animation to mount up into his head,
not to consider that if he don't keep such a business as the present, as close as possible,
it can't be worth a mag to him. It's so curious. You see your temper got the better of you.
That's where you lost ground, says Mr. Bucket in an argumentative and friendly way.
I only said I wouldn't go without one of their servants came up to Sir Leicester deadlock,
returns Mr. Smallweed. That's it. That's where your temper got the better of you.
Now, you keep it under another time and you'll make money by it. Shall I ring for them to carry you
down? When are we to hear more of this, Mrs. Chad Benz sternly demands. Bless your heart for a true
woman. Always curious, your delightful sex is, replies Mr. Bucket with gallantry. I shall have
the pleasure of giving you a call tomorrow or next day, not forgetting Mr. Smallweed and his
proposal of 250. 500 exclaims Mr. Smallweed. All right, nominally 500. Mr. Bucket has his hand on
the bell-rope. Shall I wish you good day for the present on the part of myself and the gentleman
of the house? He asks in an insinuating tone. Nobody, having the hardy hood to object to his doing so,
he does it and the party retire as they came up. Mr. Bucket follows them to the door and returning
says with an air of serious business. Sir Leicester deadlock, Baronit, it's for you to consider whether
or not to buy this up. I should recommend on the whole it's being bought up myself and I think
it may be bought pretty cheap. You see that little pickled cowcomber of a Mrs. Snagsby has been used
by all sides of the speculation and has done a deal more harm in bringing odds and ends together
than if she had meant it. Mr. Tolkien horned deceased. He held all these horses in his hand and could
have drove him his own way. I haven't a doubt, but he was fetched off the box head foremost and now
they have got their legs over the traces and are all dragging and pulling their own ways.
So it is and such is life, the cats away and the mice they play and the frost breaks up in the
water runs now with regard to the party to be apprehended. Sir Leicester seems to wake though his
eyes have been wide open and he looks intently at Mr. Bucket as Mr. Bucket refers to his watch.
The party to be apprehended is now in this house proceeds Mr. Bucket putting up his watch with a
steady hand and with rising spirits and I'm about to take her into custody in your presence.
Sir Leicester deadlocked Baronette, don't you say a word, not yet stir. There'll be no noise
and no disturbance at all. I'll come back in the course of the evening if agreeable to you
and endeavour to meet your wishes respecting this unfortunate family matter and the nobiest way
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Hi this is Alex Cantrowitz. I'm the host of Big Technology podcast, a longtime reporter and an
on-air contributor to CNBC. And if you're like me you're trying to figure out how artificial
intelligence is changing the business world and our lives. So each week on Big Technology
I bring on key actors from companies building AI tech and outsiders trying to influence it.
Asking where this is all going they come from places like Nvidia, Microsoft, Amazon and plenty more.
So if you want to be smart with your wallet, your career choices,
and meetings with your colleagues and at dinner parties listen to Big Technology podcast
or ever you get your podcasts. After a suspense of a minute or two the door slowly opens and
a French woman enters Mademoiselle Ortons. The moment she is in the room Mr. Bucket claps the door
to and puts his back against it. The suddenness of the noise occasions her to turn and then for the
first time she sees her lester dudlock in his chair. I ask your pardon she mutters hurriedly.
They tell me there was no one here. Her step toward the door springs her front to front with Mr. Bucket.
Suddenly a spasm shoots across her face and she turns deadly pale.
This is my larger surlester dudlock says Mr. Bucket nodding at her. This foreign young woman has
been my larger for some weeks back. What do surlester dudlock care for that you think my angel
returns Mademoiselle in a jocular strain. Why my angel returns Mr. Bucket we shall see.
Mademoiselle Ortons eyes him with a skull upon her tight face which gradually changes into a
smile of scorn. You are very mysterious. Are you drunk? tolerable sober my angel returns Mr. Bucket.
I come from arriving at this so distestable house with your wife. Your wife have left me since some
minutes. They tell me downstairs that your wife is here. I come here and your wife is not here.
What is the intention of this fool's play say then? Mademoiselle demands with her arms
composedly crossed but with something in her dark cheek beating like a clock. Mr. Bucket merely
shakes the finger at her. Oh my god you are an unhappy idiot.
Christ Mademoiselle with a toss of her head and a laugh. Leave me to pass downstairs great pig
with a stamp of her foot and a menace. Now Mademoiselle says Mr. Bucket in a cool determined way.
You will go and sit down upon that sofa. I will not sit down upon nothing she replies with a
shower of nods. Now Mademoiselle repeats Mr. Bucket making no demonstration except with the
finger. You sit down upon that sofa. Why? Because I take you into custody on a charge of murder
and you don't need to be told it. Now I want to be polite to one of your sex and a foreigner if I
can. If I can't I must be rough and there's a rougher one's outside. What I am to be depends on
you so I recommend you as a friend of four another half a blessed moment has passed over your head
to go and sit down upon that sofa. Mademoiselle complies saying in a concentrated voice while
that something in her cheeks beats fast and hard. You are a devil. Now you see Mr. Bucket proceeds
approvingly. You're comfortable and conducting yourself as I should expect a foreign young woman
of your sense to do. So I'll give you a piece of advice and it's this. Don't talk too much.
You're not expected to say anything here and you can't keep too quiet a tongue in your head.
In short the less you parlay the better you know. Mr. Bucket is very complacent over this
French explanation. Mademoiselle with that tigerish expansion of the mouth and her black eyes darting
fire upon him sits upright on the sofa in a rigid state with her hands clenched and her feet
too when might suppose muttering. Oh you bucket you are a devil. Now Sir Leicester deadlock
Baronette says Mr. Bucket and from this time fourth the finger never rests. This young woman my
lodger was her lady ships made at the time I have mentioned to you and this young woman besides
being extraordinary vehement and passionate against her leadership after being discharged.
Lie Christ Madamoiselle I discharged myself. Now why don't you take my advice returns Mr. Bucket
in an impressive almost in an imploring tone. I am surprised at the discreteness you commit.
You you'll say something that'll be used against you you know. You're sure to come to it.
Never you mind what I say till it's given in evidence. It is not addressed to you.
Discharge to Christ Madamoiselle furiously by her leadership a my faith a pretty lady ship why
I win my character by remaining with a lady ship so in fame. Upon my soul I wonder at you Mr. Bucket
reminstrates I thought the French were a polite nation I did really yet to hear a female going on
like that before Sir Leicester deadlock Baronette. He is a poor abused Christ Madamoiselle I spit
upon his house upon his name upon his imbecility all of which she makes the carpet represent.
Oh that is he is a great man oh yes superb oh heaven ba well Sir Leicester deadlock precedes Mr. Bucket
this intemperate foreigner also angrily took it into her head that she had established a claim
upon Mr. Tolkienhorn deceased by attending on the occasion I told you of at his chambers
though she was liberally paid for her time in trouble lie Christ Madamoiselle I refuse his
money altogether if you will parlay you know says Mr. Bucket parenthetically you must take the
consequences now whether she became my larger Sir Leicester deadlock with any deliberate intention
then of doing this deed and blinding me I give no opinion on but she lived in my house in that
capacity at the time that she was hovering about the chambers of the deceased Mr. Tolkienhorn
with a view to a wrangle and likewise persecuting and half frightening the life out of an unfortunate
stationer lie Christ Madamoiselle oh lie the murder was committed Sir Leicester deadlock
baronet and you know under what circumstances now I beg of you to follow me close with your
attention for a minute or two I was sent for and the case was entrusted to me I examined the
place and the body and the papers and everything from information I received from a clock in the
same house I took George into custody as having been seen hanging about there on the night and at
the very night the time of the murder also as having been overheard in high words with the deceased
on former occasions even threatening him as the witness made out if you ask me Sir Leicester
deadlock whether from the first I believe George to be the murderer I tell you candidly no but he
might be not worth standing and there was enough against him to make it my duty to take him
and get him kept under remand now observe as Mr. Bucket bends forward in some excitement for him
and inaugurates what he is going to say with one ghostly beat of his forefinger in the air
Madamoiselle Hortons fixes her black eyes upon him with a dark frown and sets her dry lips closely
and firmly together I went home Sir Leicester deadlocked Baronet at night and found this young woman
having supper with my wife Mrs. Bucket she had made a mighty show of being fond of Mrs. Bucket
from her first offering herself as our larger but that night she made more than ever in fact overdid
it likewise she overdid her respect and all that for the lamented memory of the deceased Mr.
Tolkien horn by the living lord it flashed upon me as I sat opposite to her at the table
and saw her with a knife in her hand that she had done it Madamoiselle is hardly audible in
straining through her teeth and lips the words you are a devil now where pursues Mr. Bucket had
she been on the night of the murder she had been to the theater she really was there I have found
since both before the deed and after it I knew I had an artful customer to deal with and that
proof would be very difficult and I laid a trap for her such a trap as I never laid yet with
such a venture as I never made yet I worked it out in my mind while I was talking to her at
supper when I went upstairs to bed our house being small and this young woman's ears sharp
I stuffed the sheet into Mrs. Bucket's mouth that she shouldn't say a word of surprise
and told her all about it my dear don't you give your mind to that again or I shall link your
feet together at the ankles Mr. Bucket breaking off has made a noiseless descent upon Madamoiselle
and laid his heavy hand upon her shoulder what is the matter with you now she asks him
don't you think anymore returns Mr. Bucket with and monetary finger of throwing yourself out of
window that's what's the matter with me come just take my arm you needn't get up I'll sit down
by you now take my arm will you I'm a married man you know you're acquainted with my wife
just take my arm vainly endeavouring to moisten those dry lips with a painful sound she struggles
with herself and complies
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if you enjoy journalism that drifts into mild panic wild overthinking and a guaranteed nervous breakdown
lunatic in the newsroom is for you it's news like you've never heard before the only newsroom
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now we're all right again sir lester deadlock baronette this case could never have been the case
it is but for missus bucket who was a woman in fifty thousand in a hundred and fifty thousand
to throw this young woman off her guard I have never set foot in our house since though I've
communicated with missus bucket in the baker's loaves and in the milk as often as required my whispered
words to missus bucket when she had the sheet in her mouth were my dear can you throw her off
continually with natural accounts of my suspicions against George and this and that and the other
can you do without rest and keep watch upon her night and day can you undertake to say she shall
do nothing without my knowledge she shall be my prisoner without suspecting it she shall
no more escape from me than from death and her life shall be my life and her soul my soul till
I have got her if she did this murder missus bucket says to me as well as she could speak on
account of the sheet bucket I can and she has acted up to it glorious lies mademoiselle
interposes all lies my friend sir lester deadlock baronette how did my calculations come out
under these circumstances when I calculated that this impetuous young woman would overdo
it in new directions was I wrong or right I was right what does she try to do don't let it give
you a turn to throw the murder on her lady ship so lester rises from his chair and staggers down
again and she got encouragement in it from hearing that I was always here which was done a purpose
now open that pocketbook of mine sir lester deadlock if I may take the liberty of throwing it
towards you and look at the letters sent to me each with the two words lady deadlock in it
open the one directed to yourself which I stopped this very morning and read the three words
lady deadlock murderous in it these letters have been falling about like a shower of lady birds
what do you say now to missus bucket from her spy place having seen them all written by this young
woman what do you say to missus bucket having within this half hour secured the corresponding
ink and paper fellow half sheets and whatnot what do you say to missus bucket having watched
the posting of him every one by this young woman so lester deadlock baronette mr bucket asks
triumphant in his admiration of his lady's genius two things are especially observable
as mr bucket proceeds to a conclusion first he seems imperceptibly to establish a dreadful
right of property in mademoiselle secondly that the very atmosphere she breathes seems to narrowing
contract about her as if a close net or a paw were being drawn nearer and yet nearer around her
breathless figure there is no doubt that her lady ship was on the spot at the eventful periods
as mr bucket and my foreign friend here saw her I believe from the upper part of the staircase
her lady ship and george and my foreign friend were all pretty close on one another's heels
but that don't signify anymore so i'll not go into it i found the wadding of the pistol
with which the deceased mr talking horn was shot it was a bit of the printed description
of your house at chestney world not much in that you'll say so lester deadlock baronette
no but when my foreign friend here is thoroughly off her guard as to think it is safe time to
tear up the rest of that leaf and when mr bucket puts the pieces together and finds the
wadding wanting it begins to look like queer street these are very long lies mademoiselle
interposes you post great deal it is that you have almost finished or are you speaking always
so lester deadlock baronette precedes mr bucket who delights in a full title and does violence
to himself when he dispenses with any fragment of it the last point in the case which i am now
going to mention shows the necessity of patience in our business and never doing a thing in a hurry
i watched this young woman yesterday without her knowledge when she was looking at the funeral
in company with my wife who planned to take her there and i had so much to convict her and i
saw such an expression in her face and my mind so rose against her malice toward her lady ship
and the time was altogether such a time for bringing down what you may call retribution upon her
that if i had been a younger hand with less experience i should have taken her certain
equally last night when her leadership as is so universally admired i am sure come home looking
why lord a man might almost say like venus rising from the ocean it was so unpleasant and inconsistent
to think of her being charged with the murder of which she was innocent that i felt quite to want
to put an end to the job what should i have lost so lester deadlock baronette i should have lost
the weapon my prisoner here proposed to mr bucket after the departure of the funeral that they
should go per bus a little ways into the country and take tea at a very decent house of entertainment
now near that house of entertainment there's a piece of water at tea my prisoner got up to fetch
her pocket handkerchief from the bedroom where the bonnet's was and she was rather a long time gone
and came back a little out of wind as soon as they came home this was reported to me by mr bucket
along with her observations and suspicions i had the piece of water dragged by moonlight
in presence of a couple of our men and the pocket pistol was brought up before it had been there
a half a dozen hours now my dear put your arm a little further through mine and hold it steady
and i shan't hurt you in a trice mr bucket snaps a handcuff on her wrist that's one says mr bucket
now the other darling to and all told he rises and she rises too where she asks him darkening her
large eyes until their drooping lids almost conceal them and yet they stare where is your false
your treacherous and cursed wife she's gone forward to the police office returns mr bucket
you'll see her there my dear i would like to kiss her exclaims met him with a whole tones
panting tygress like you'd bite her eyes suspects as mr bucket i would making her eyes very large
i would love to tear her limb from limb bless you darling says mr bucket with the greatest
composure i'm fully prepared to hear that your sex have such a surprising animosity against one
another when you do differ you don't mind me have so much do you know though you are devils still
angel and devil by turns a christ mr bucket but i am in my regular employment you must consider
let me put your shawl tidy i've been a lady's maid to a good many before now anything wanting to
the bonnet there's a cab at the door mademoiselle or tons casting an indignant eye at the glass
shakes herself perfectly neat in one shake and looks to do her justice uncommonly gentile
listen then my angel says she after several sarcastic nods you are very spiritual but can you
restore him back to life mr bucket answers not exactly
that is drool listen yet one time you are very spiritual can you make an honorable lady of her
don't be so malicious says mr bucket or a hotty gentleman of him
christ mademoiselle referring to sir lester with an effable disdain ae oh then regard him the poor
infant come come why this is worse parlaying than the other says mr bucket come along
you cannot do these things then you can do as you please with me it is but the death it is all
the same let us go my angel at you you old man gray i pity you and i despise you with these last
words she snaps her teeth together as if her mouth closed with a spring it is impossible to
describe how mr bucket gets her out but he accomplishes that feat in a manner so peculiar to
himself in folding and pervading her like a cloud and hovering away with her as if he were a
homely jupiter and she the object of his affections sir lester left alone remains in the same
attitude as though he were still listening and his attention were still occupied at length he
gazes around the empty room and finding it deserted rises unsteadily to his feet pushes back his
chair and walks a few steps supporting himself by the table then he stops and with more of those
inarticulate sounds lifts up his eyes and seems to stare at something heaven knows what he sees
the green green woods of chestney wall the noble house the pictures of his forefathers strangers
defacing them officers of police coarsely handling his most precious heirlooms thousands of
fingers pointing at him thousands of faces snaring at him but if such shadows flip before him to his
bewilderment there is one other shadow which he can name with something like distinctness even
and to which alone he addresses his tearing of his white hair and his extended arms it is she
in association with whom saving that she has been for years a main fiber of the root of his
dignity and pride he has never had a selfish thought it is she whom he has loved admired
honored and set up for the world to respect it is she who at the core of all the constrained
formalities and conventionalities of his life has been a stock of living tenderness and love
susceptible as nothing else is of being struck with the agony he feels he sees her almost to the
exclusion of himself and cannot bear to look upon her cast down from the high place she has graced
so well and even to the point of his sinking on the ground oblivious of his suffering he can yet
pronounce her name with something like distinctness in the midst of those intrusive sounds and
in a tone of mourning and compassion rather than reproach end of chapter 54
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