169. The Paradox of School Leadership: Control

Recently, I was speaking with a school owner who was selling a location. She had truly done her due diligence in her preparations for this moment, crossing every T and dotting every I. The only thing left to do was to inform her team.

Feeling anxiety about the conversation, she came to me for coaching and guidance. Many coaches might give general advice about drinking water, going on a walk, or meditating. But she wasn’t coming to me for help shaking off her nerves. She was looking for something deeper.

So I asked her, “Do you believe that, because you checked every box, you can control the narrative, and your team should handle the news gracefully?”

Yes, that was exactly what she was feeling.

Then I told her she must accept the discomfort of the fact that she could not, in reality, control her team’s response to the news.

This is the paradox of control. We want control, but what we actually need is trust.

Join me on the podcast for a conversation about:

• How the paradox of control manifests inside ECE centers, including your own
• Drawing a distinction between control and influence, and why it matters for leaders
• How to cultivate resilience and humanity by confronting the paradox of control
• Questions for deep reflection to help you become a stronger, wiser leader​

Want a written summary of this episode?

Grab it here: https://schoolsofexcellence.com/paradox

Learn more and apply for the Director’s Inner Circle & Owner’s HQ: https://schoolsofexcellence.com/membership/ 

 When certain aspects of our center spiral out of our control, we can either attempt to wrestle control back, or we can cultivate long-term stability and resilience. As you sit with the discomfort of the paradox of control, I would be honored to support you. During a Schools of Excellence Leadership Day Intensive, you’ll get a full day of on-demand, in-school training and coaching with me, plus various accountability check-ins, to help you and your team work through the paradoxes of leadership. https://schoolsofexcellence.com/leadership/

If you’re looking for the ongoing guidance, camaraderie, and support of a community of like-minded leaders as you grow as a leader, apply for our Owner's HQ and Director's Inner Circle membership programs. As a member, you'll gain access to tools, resources, coaching, and community that will help you build a school of excellence. https://schoolsofexcellence.com/membership/

More about the show:

If you are an Early Childhood director or owner, prepare to transform your school and life with the Schools of Excellence podcast. Tune in each week to learn from Chanie Wilschanski, the founder and host of the Schools of Excellence Podcast and a mom of 4 little kids. Each episode will be packed with tools and strategies – equipping you to build schools with higher staff retention, teacher motivation, parent partnership, collaborative culture, and beautiful quality of life. 

Every week, Chanie shares the truth about the journey to excellence, the strategies that are working TODAY, and the mindset about the critical decisions and choices that you make every day which impact yourself, your teachers, parents, family, and children who you serve every day.