289: Philip McKernan- Relationships Move At The Speed Of Vulnerability

The Learning Leader Show With Ryan Hawk

Episode #289: Philip McKernan - Relationships Move At The Speed Of Vulnerability

Show Notes:

• Commonalities of sustaining excellence:
  • Moments where they feel like a fraud, question themselves.  They are more comfortable within those moments
    • This allows them to bounce back quicker
  • They seek and attract things that are outside of their normal comfort zone
  • The Picasso example -- The courage to face the failure and own up to it
• "Vulnerability is the only way to truly deepen relationships"
  • "When you say, "I don't know," it helps others feel empowered to help"
• Philip felt worthless at age 14. He felt isolated and alone, a burden to try and fit in.  "That pain had a purpose."
  • How to go from an isolated and alone 14 year old to a keynote speaker who moves people to tears?
• How to deal with skeptics?
  • "That's okay. But, I would address it now. Couples typically wait five years too long to get counseling.  Do it now."
• What do you do? "I create environments for people to go deep. I meet them where they're at."
• The story of starting this business on the side in an Irish pub.
  • "The hardest time of my life was at the beginning, but I didn't allow lack of money to impact what I did."
  • "What are you willing to give up to do what you want?"
  • "I stopped making the journey about me... It was about them."
• Why Philip will not send his kids to college...
  • "Spend time learning. You need to understand who you are. A classroom is not built on how to get to know who you are."
• The "Planes, Trains, & Automobiles" test:
  • Kevin Bacon started his career with no lines... But kept working. "Be willing to put in the work. Run for the cab."
• Is "follow your passion good advice?"
  • "Yes and no.  There is a big difference between excitement and passion.  I believe we all have gifts and so many people use their talents."
  • "For you, sales was a talent, but your gift is connecting with people. To lift them, to help them, to build confidence."
  • "We are all leaders but a lot of people lead from an inauthentic space. It's not what we do, it's how we do it."
• What is One Last Talk?
  • "If you had 15 minutes left to live to share your message, what would you say? You need to share with the world to free yourself."
  • The process creates freedom.  People want to connect.  This is "team deepening."
• Why write a book?
  • "Everyone has the capacity to make an impact. I believe all of us carry some demons."
  • "It's like five years of therapy in one book." "The book is by me, but it's not for me.  I will never sign it."
• "One of the greatest burdens a child can bare is the unlived life of their parents."