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Episode 3968, when life doesn't go as planned.
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Moms, it's time to rediscover, rejuvenate, and renew whom you are in mind body and spirit.
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Welcome to Create Your Now, Your Best Selfie, the show that help you do just that.
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Here's your host, Certified Life Coach, personal trainer, and nutritionist, Christian Wardo.
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Happy Epi day, I hope you're having a fabulous start to your week or maybe you decided to make
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this a holiday because you were watching Super Bowl. Yeah, I know. Who knows did your team win?
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Well, then life doesn't go as planned. For those of you who are brand new to Create Your Now,
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welcome to this incredible family. I'm so delighted of your presence. If you aren't even
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had the opportunity, you want to head on over to CreatureNow.com where you can learn more
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and sign up for the Kisses newsletter. They keep it simple strategy, everyday solutions,
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to live, love, and impact. Well, this episode is brought to you by AIM, Inspiring Connection,
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and Community. Okay, so really, did your team win? Did you want to see I'll see Hawks?
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Well, if you watched it, you know, I'm not going to be this spoiler here.
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See I'll see Hawks beat the New England Patriots. Congratulations to them. But more importantly,
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honestly, congratulations to our Olympians. If you've been watching them and the stories are
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ready that are coming out of the Olympics, oh my goodness. It's like, when life doesn't go as
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planned, but yet then it goes a different way and it goes even better. And sometimes I think
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we have to put things in perspective. And so I thought, hmm, maybe we need this Monday
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quarterbacking to look a little bit differently when life doesn't go as planned, right? Because have
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you ever paused to ask yourself why the goals you want set remain out of reach? Like, why are you not
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getting to where you want to go? Why are the plans you carefully crafted seem to unravel,
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leaving you stuck somewhere between disappointment and confusion? When life doesn't go as planned,
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the fallout can feel like a long, harsh fall very far, right? So just orienting that,
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figuring out the next step seems impossible. And yet, we cling to that single burning desire
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to push through and reclaim the path we envisioned. You know, life rarely bends to our will.
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In fact, usually we're the ones that are caught and we're, you know, with the injuries even because
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we have to bend to it. Our decisions set a chain of actions and motion, but outcomes depend on factors
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both within and beyond our control. You probably can think about five things right now off the top of
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your head. I'm like, oh, yeah, when life didn't go as planned. Yeah, I remember when. I remember.
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Maybe it's too fresh for you. Maybe you're in that right now. Success or failure isn't just about
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the choices you make. It's about how you respond when those choices don't deliver the results you
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aimed for. Because a lot of times what are we working towards? The results let's be real. If it's
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your health, you want to be healthier. So you're aiming for the results. If you want to do a career
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move, you're aiming for that job or that promotion, right? And when that doesn't happen, it's like,
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that's the results. Whoever thought about the in between.
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So what do you do when things don't pan out? What have you done in the past? Do you stew and frustration
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letting the weight of unmet expectations crush your momentum? Do you quit and just move on,
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chalking the experience up to, well, it's just a loss. No big deal. I'll come in a different way
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or maybe you just drop it or do you pause long enough to reflect, recalibrate, and then lean back
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in with fresh resolve. Urgency and looming deadlines can pressure us into rushing through setbacks.
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It's like, we got it. We got to get back in. We got to get back into the game. Did you watch
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this Super Bowl? Did you wonder if the New England Patriots would ever come around? I mean,
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crazy, huh? Zero for so long for the New England Patriots. They weren't scoring squat.
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And Drake May was getting sacked. Maybe that's your season right now. You're just getting sacked.
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You're not getting where you want to go. You're two steps up, but you're 10 steps back.
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And it's tempting to sweep failures under the rug and act like they never happen. Like,
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oh, it's all right, but life is too short. And your dreams, your passion, your purpose is too
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important for surface level fixes. Sometimes you need to stop right there. Just stop.
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Take time to rest to think, to shift your mindset away from obsessing over the outcome
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and toward evaluating your efforts. What are you learning? What's actually coming out of it?
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Maybe it has nothing to do with the results and everything to do about value.
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Because, yeah, why the value? Why the efforts? Because results can fill like fickle markers of
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worth. They don't always reflect your hustle or your learning or your growth. And when you hold
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tight to your efforts, rather than clutching desperately to a specific result, you build resilience,
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you get stronger. You turn failure into fuel. That is your kiss to keep a simple strategy,
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turn failure into fuel. This isn't about having all the answers, all the time and being right,
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all the time. It's about saying, this is where I am right now. I may not like the results,
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but my effort can still take me somewhere. Big difference. And you know that isn't done by quitting,
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right? You got to hold on to determination and diligence, no matter what life throws at you.
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So what does that look like in real life? I mean, come on. If you were playing in the Super Bowl,
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and you were second runner up, mm-hmm. I know. It's hard. I mean, I can't say I've ever played
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in the Super Bowl, but I've had my moments where it was like a Super Bowl. And I didn't come out
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on top. It's hard always being the first runner up. It's hard always not making it to the point
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where you go, gosh, am I even supposed to be where I'm supposed to be? Right? I mean, that's the
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real deal. That's what we think about. I mean, maybe you're looking at your family going, how did I end
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up with all these kids? I'm not fit to be a mom. I'm horrible at it. And now I'm trying to think
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about this career thing. And, huh, and have you looked at the world? It is a mess right now.
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Right? We could go on and on and on. And you're like, the laundry. I've got like 20 pounds of it
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in one basket. Yeah, I mean, that is reality, right? How can you have 20 pounds of laundry in one
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basket? Oh, you figure away. When you've got about 20 loads to do, oh, that basket can hold 20 to
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20, 35 pounds, right? Yeah, I know. Been there. Done that. Sometimes I'm doing it still. But what
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does it look like in real life to turn failure into fuel and really to grab a hold of determination
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and diligence? Number one, pause and assess. Take a deliberate breath. I literally breathe.
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There were times I was watching the Super Bowl. And I got to tell you, I'm going to be honest here.
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I know Mama Sports Center here is she's being honest. I was kind of underwhelmed about the whole
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thing. I was watching the Olympics more than I was watching the Super Bowl. And I will say I
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did find two commercials that I liked, by the way. I didn't watch a lot of the commercials. And
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if you're wondering, did I watch the halftime show? I did not. Why? I was doing other things in my
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world. And so I just didn't have time for that. I wasn't interested in it. I don't watch the Super Bowl
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for the halftime show. I watched the Super Bowl for the game of football. That's what I want to see.
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I don't need all this in between stuff, quite frankly. And we could cut the time in half,
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you know, if we didn't have that whole regular role. But regardless, that's a sidebar.
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But when you think about what you're doing and where you are, sometimes we just need to take a breath.
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And I felt like sometimes Drake may just needed that breath, not necessarily on the field. I mean,
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I know there's a timer and all that going down right at clock that's keeping you going.
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But I think on the sidelines, instead of him getting himself in his own head, like,
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wrapping himself going, I'm not doing this right. I just, why can't I connect? And I don't know
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what it is. And I'm just, oh, the defense and the Seattle Seahawks, they are just taking me down.
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I mean, I think they're like six sacks at least by one person.
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Over the game, and I might be misquoting that, but there was a lot of sacks by one guy.
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And then you look at the total sacks. I don't know what that final count was, by the way. But
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all I saw, I felt like is every single time I looked at the TV, Drake made was going down.
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And I thought, I know he can be sacked a lot, but seriously, I've got to tell you though,
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this is just my off the record. Seattle Seahawks defense won the game and special teams.
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Just saying. Yep. And they're kicker because it wasn't anything else.
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But that means what the team won the game, right? It wasn't one person stand out. It wasn't a one
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person game. And I think sometimes we've got to take that away when we're looking at our situation.
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Are we trying to look at it through only one lens, our own, or do we need to look at it from a team
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perspective? Literally, maybe if it involves your family, look at it from a family perspective.
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Then if it deals with your career, look at it from, you know, your hierarchy of maybe who your
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bosses and their boss, and then maybe a couple of people below you. And so you have a team.
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That's a lot different than one person. And quite honestly, we're not here to shoulder everything
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in the world. Yet I know we try. So take that deliberate breath, acknowledge what went wrong without
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judgment. Again, don't judge. You gotta be kind to yourself. And this moment of clarity helps you
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understand your decisions and their impact. So your next action is smarter, not just reactionary.
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Sometimes we move too fast that we do not see the struggles before they happen because we're
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just running. Sometimes we have to slow down or to speed up. Right? Who won? The tortoise or the
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hare? I'm just saying. Okay, number two, reframe failure. Look at failure as a signpost, not a dead end.
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Right? It's a way that you learn things. I know that's hard. I'm, hey, I'm human too, right?
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When I fail, oh, does it hurt? Man, it bleeds. It does, right? Let's be honest.
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But as we grow older and as we mature, it's important for us to look at ourselves even and say,
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you know what, a failure, it's not the end of the world. It's okay. But how can we get back up?
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How can it be just like this little caution sign that's put in front of us instead of a dead end
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do not ever walk this way again? Right? Big difference. It becomes feedback, valuable data on what
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didn't work, where the gaps are, maybe where you need to close something up and what you can do
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differently. This mindset reduces fear and opens room for growth. So reframe that failure.
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See, it is a lesson learned and go from there. And then finally, number three, commit to consistent
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action. You got to show up every day, every single day, even when you're tired to show up,
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you may not be able to do as much. But when you show up, guess what? Maybe you're taking a nap
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is exactly what you need to do. But that's a decision that you made. And that's committing to,
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I'm going to do this. And sometimes you have to acknowledge, this is what I really need
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and be okay with that. Not to beat yourself up over it. Look at your season and say,
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what can I do in this season? That season may last a month. So what can you do in that month?
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Chip away at those goals, regardless of setbacks. Because remember, you're not looking at results.
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You're looking now from where? Your efforts. What is valuable?
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Determination isn't about giant leaps. It's about faithful persistence.
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No one reaches greatness overnight. Yes, I know we think they do, but how many games
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did it take for the Seattle Seahawks and the New England Patriots to get to the Super Bowl?
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A lot of you would say too many. I get it. Isn't it like 16 in regular season? And then there's
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what three or four, depending upon where they are post seasons. Are we 18 games or maybe the 18th
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game? Anyway, I know you're yelling at me saying, Christian, you should know this. Mama Sports
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Center does not know this right now. I'm just saying. But it's a lot of games, right? It's one
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that I can't count on just my hands. So what I'm here to remind you of them getting to their Superbowl,
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we're trying to get to our Super Bowl. It's not going to happen overnight. It feels like it should
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because when we look at everybody else's highlight reels, they got there so fast. They did not.
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They had sleepless nights just like you do. Then nights where it went on and on and on.
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There were arguments. There were so many setbacks. A lot of people don't want to tell that
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side of the story because why? It's not that sexy. It's not. But you see, when you're real with
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yourself, that's what matters. It's not about having the sexy, sassy life of like,
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oh, look, I've arrived. Have you seen some of those people who've arrived?
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Give them five years and see what their life looks like. Yeah, sometimes it just doesn't look good,
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does it? Because at arrival, that hello I've arrived doesn't really fit where we're supposed to go.
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Sometimes those setbacks can actually be protection. Lots and lots of different ways to look at it.
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But here's the main thing I want you to take away from this. Just because you're not getting the
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results you want doesn't mean you're not winning. If that's the only thing you hear about that
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or hear from me today, take that. Just because your results aren't getting you what you think you
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should have doesn't mean you're not winning. You are winning. You're not a loser, you're winning.
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But your story just looks different and there's nothing wrong with that. Because remember,
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success isn't a straight line. It's a messy path filled with choices that sometimes lead to many,
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many stumbles and troubles. But those stumbles and troubles don't have to define you or your
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journey. They can teach you sharpen you and they can set you up for an even stronger comeback.
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So hang tight, my friend. Stay focused on the effort you pour in daily, not just the scoreboard.
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Now I know, if you're at the Seattle Seahawks, you're like, yeah, look at that scoreboard,
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eat it knowing the Patriots. Let's be kind, right? It's a game. It's not the end of the world
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if your team lost. And even if you look at your scoreboard and you don't feel like you're winning,
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let me tell you, look at your heart first instead and you'll see a different scoreboard.
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And don't forget, right? It's the next step that you're looking for. So take that deep breath.
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One step at a time leads to your miles of greatness. Go in peace, be present, be incredible, be you.
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I love you so very much. I cannot wait to see you on the other side.
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Blessing Tags and lots and lots of love. We'll talk to you real soon. Have a great day.
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Bye-bye. Feeling inspired and ready to train for life and love your journey, visit createyournow.com
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for more incredible resources to help you along the way. We'll see you next time on Create Your Now,
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Your Best Selfie. And remember, always be sure you consult your physician before beginning any
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health and fitness plans.