6 Years 296 days - Van the MAN

Alright, you are back with comedian Boyle and I'm quitting alcohol.

So I went to the Van Morrison concert last night and I can tell you, Van is unequivocally

the man. To be honest with you, I wasn't expecting much because I know the history of

Van Morrison. He's a grumpy cunt, he doesn't like playing his old songs, he just wants

to do what he wants to do like any true artist and plus he's 80 years old. So I obviously

wasn't expecting too much, I just wanted to see Van Morrison out of all the people throughout

all the years of listening to Van Morrison is the constant. From when I was a kid up until

fucking, I still listen to Van Morrison all the time now, especially renewed Van Morrison

because the kids like him too. And so I get to share it with them. So there was a little

bit of nostalgia to the whole thing. I was going for nostalgic reasons, but Van Morrison

he's a fucking performer. He's an artist. His voice was still fucking on point. He couldn't

launch into sustained astral weeks fucking 1960s energetic fucking possessed harmonics,

but you could hear Van in his voice. And at times he let rip, he fucking jumped on the

saxophone and shredded the saxophone was playing harmonica, got the guitar out, was leading

the band. And I was I was getting very emotional like I was tearing up three songs in I started

tearing up. I'm like that's Van Morrison. And then I was like I've been listening to this

guy since I was a kid. Van's music has been probably the most important music to me throughout

my life. And I'm like him here and he's here. And then I was like I'll always just be a

little kid listening to Van. And I was starting to get like emotional. I'm even a little

bit emotional now. I'm like that's all you ever are you just a little kid. I'm like I'm just

a little kid listening to Van Morrison always. And the tears are welling up in my eyes. And like I'm

getting full emotional. And then the guy behind me some American cunt. Start speaking out of volume

that is astounding for a concert. It's a sit down concert. It's not like people were up there

dancing. They probably wanted to dance. But here's another thing about fucking Van Morrison. He's

80 and actually he's looking pretty good. I thought he was going to be fat, but he was actually

quite slim like he was skinny. So he's 80 and he's looking he's doing pretty good. Tell you who's

not doing too good. His crowd. His crowd are looking pretty shaky. I'm telling you right now if he

comes back for another fucking run. Another concert. I wouldn't leave it five years. That's all I'm

saying. If he leaves it five years, the Wang theater, which is one of the most beautiful theaters

I've ever been in. I want to play that theater. I want to stand where Van stood and tell some racist

jokes. So I'm focusing in on that. It's so fucking beautiful that theater. I fucking loved it.

But if he leaves it five years, he's going to have to reduce the venue because the average age I would

say of his crowd is gray hair and bald. There was a lot of walking sticks. There was a lot of

walking sticks going up and down the aisle. I'll just put it that way. So if I was Van and you

feeling healthy, I'd do another run through in maybe a year or two, five years, you might be playing

a much smaller venue. And I tell you what else wasn't there? People of color. There were no people

of color besides my wife and one other guy. So it was all old white people with gray hair or

bald. And I'm not exaggerating there. It was the last remaining remnants of the boomer contingency.

So anyway, I was getting emotional and I'm tearing up thinking I'm always just, I'm just a little kid

listening to their Morrison. And then this fucking American can't, obviously everyone,

pretty much everyone is from America. But like, you know, the loud ones this can't

was speaking so fucking loud. And he was directly behind me as well. He was just fucking

doing my head in before this started, before the concert started. He was behind me on a phone call

and he's like yelling into the phone, trying to convince this guy to come down because he's

got a spare ticket. And he finally convinces this guy to come down. He hangs up the phone

and like at the top of his voice, he turns to his mate and he's like, he's black.

And his mate's like, yeah, okay. He's like, yeah, he's black. You know, he has a little bit of

dementia. They had something, they did something to his head. They drained some fluid. So he's a

little bit dense too. And I'm like, alright, this is before the concerts. I'm like, this guy is

going to be a fucking problem. And then fucking, he just in the middle of the concert, he starts

fucking talking. And I am fucking angry. I'm turning back to him. And I'm not even pretending. I'm

like, if you continue speaking, there's going to be problems. I was even thinking, I'll probably

get thrown out of the country if I attack this guy. If I attack this guy, I'm probably going to

jail for a little bit. And I'll get thrown out of the country. And I was weighing up my options

as well. This can't was fucking doing my head in. So I would stare at him and then he'd be quiet

for a little bit, but the can't couldn't help himself. So I'm fucking oscillating in between

like visualizing full visualizing, murdering this guy and crying because I'm watching Van Morrison.

And then Van played fucking, I couldn't believe it. He played Into the Mystic, which is my dad's favorite

song. And probably, well, one of my favorite Van Morrison songs ever. And it just so happens to

be the song when I was first messaging my wife before we met. This is when I was like, still

fucking drinking before I quit when I met her. I was like, you gotta listen. You gotta listen to

Into the Mystic. If you can understand that song, you can understand me. And so she listened to it,

she's like, what's with this song? But it has some history with us as well. So he played that song

and again, emotional as fuck. My wife's getting emotional. I'm getting emotional. It's a beautiful

fucking thing. And then I start thinking, I'm like, it was great watching Van Morrison sing into

the Mystic. Like, that was beautiful. And he actually closed with Gloria as well. And I'm like,

that was great, but I actually fucking loved watching him just do his thing on the other songs

that I had no fucking idea what they were. I'd never heard them before, but he was like locked in

on some of these other songs. And that was dragging me in more. And I'm like, actually, artists

like Van Morrison don't give you what you want. They give you what you need. Like, you don't under,

and I was thinking about this as well, unlike the courage it took Van Morrison to decide not to play

his hits throughout his career is monumental. To decide, no, I'm not going to just do covers of

my old songs. I'm an artist. I'm going to continue creating art. And the people can either take it

or leave it. That takes true, true courage. Because what happens when you make that decision is

your audience gets smaller and smaller and smaller. That's why when you go and see a concept,

Metallica, AC, DC, Rolling Stones, they're just fucking churning out the classics. Because if they

don't play satisfaction or shook me all night long, if they're not just churning out the hits,

they can have two songs in a row that are like new. But if they have three or four in a row,

that you don't know, the audience will start walking out. They're like, fucking, these guys

suck now. Let's leave. So Van Morrison had to go through that. He had hits. He had fucking like

six of the greatest albums ever in a row at the start of his career. He could have just lived off that,

just played fucking moonlight or fucking brown-eyed girl and just made everyone happy. But he didn't do

that. And he sacrificed audience for his artistic integrity. And he rewards the people that

stayed with him because you actually don't want to watch someone like Van Morrison sing a retarded

version of the songs that you've listened to your whole entire life. What you want to see them

doing is what they're up to now, where they are artistically now. And you've got to trust the

artist. I didn't understand that until last night. I didn't understand what he did until last night.

And I'm sure he was a cunt all those years is because everyone just wanted him to play the

fucking hits. And he just wanted to showcase where he's at now. And people who went with him on

the journey are the ones who got rewarded. Well, there's a tension between doing the old songs

because it is really a gift to be able to play an old song in a concert and take the audience member

back to where they were when they were listening to this music. You know, because like people have

a connection to music that's deeper, probably deeper than any other art. And so to play a song or

two is a gift to the audience. And when he was playing Gloria at the end, he wasn't belting it out

like it sounds on the album. He's 80 now, but he was singing it in his own way. Everyone was up

and it was a nice end to it. But the beauty of the show was actually the stuff that he enjoyed.

I just fucking loved it. I fucking loved it. My wife loved it. It was great. He's released 42. I

think was say the 42 or 48 albums prolific. That is prolific. I've listened to I would say 10.

I remember a few years back. I was doing album for album Bob Dylan and Van Morrison. And Bob Dylan

was ahead until astral weeks. And I just don't think there's a better album than astral weeks.

Bringing it back home, Bob Dylan was my favorite Bob Dylan. But astral weeks is something else.

It's completely something else. Anyway, it was a very soul nourishing night last night. It was good

to get a couple of fucking tears out. I didn't end up killing the guy behind me, although I wanted to.

The lady in front of me wanted to as well. He didn't stop after I gave him the eyeballs either.

He continued. And I did say one time when I looked back, I was like, you better shut the fuck up

pretty quick. I don't know if you heard it, but I said it. And this girl in front of me, she was

fucking eyeballing him too, yelling at her. You're going to be quiet. So it wasn't just me. It was

this prick. He was a fucking prick. The dense black guy who was the only other person a color

in the fucking whole venue. He was quiet. I suppose because he's dense. Anyway,

fucking that went way too long. So I'm just going to go fucked up Friday tomorrow. I'll do

the fucked up Friday tomorrow. This is a stand alone van the man episode. It was so good. I

fucking loved it. Anyway, that'll do for tonight. Enjoy your weekend and I'll see you the fuck