Afraid to be the “crazy wife” with ADHD (Sela Carsen’s story)

Romance author Sela Carsen saw herself in her daughter’s ADHD evaluation 20 years ago. But she didn’t request an evaluation for herself until just 4 years ago. She was afraid that having ADHD would have a negative effect on her husband’s military career — that she’d be the “crazy wife.” 

Once Sela was finally diagnosed with ADHD, she had a big sense of relief. She felt capable in her job as an author, and that she “didn’t have to hate herself so much” anymore. Hear this conversation with Sela and host Laura Key as they chat about ADHD shame, Gen X’s outlook on mental health, and neurodivergent book characters. 

Related resources

• ADHD and: Procrastination
• ADHD and caffeine
• Understood.org Neurodiversity at Work Survey: Focus on Generation Z

Timestamps

(01:46) When did Sela start to notice signs of ADHD in herself?  

(03:48) Why Sela didn’t pursue an ADHD evaluation while her husband was in active duty

(05:46) How ADHD symptoms affected her life while she was undiagnosed  

(08:55) Finally seeking an ADHD evaluation

(14:11) Neurodivergent story characters

(17:45) How being Gen X changes how you approach ADHD

(20:24) What’s next for Sela?

For a transcript and more resources, visit the ADHD Aha! page on Understood.

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Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

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