Assault In The Dabbleverse

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And now, the bonfire with Big J. Olkerson and Robert Kelly.

Yeah. Where would he be?

Where would he be?

I do like your shirt.

Yeah.

Of course. Robert Kraft, where you got whacked off.

That's right. I'm going to go down there and get whacked off too.

You should.

I'm going to recreate what Robert Kraft did.

Yeah. He's a legend.

I'm going to get caught too.

I'll turn it up.

It's the best part of the song.

You are going to get caught.

I am going to get caught.

You're a screamer.

I'm going to get caught with three fingers.

Deepen your butthole.

I'm going to take it.

I'm going to take two more than Kraft took.

Yeah. I want you bent over for it.

Bending over.

It's going to be a long time.

I'll be in my back.

Did you ever like Cypress Hill?

I think I said it.

Do I have like fingers in my ass?

I know you love fingers in your ass.

You know that.

Do you ever like Cypress Hill though?

Is that cancer time?

No.

Oh shit.

No.

I like them.

I like them.

It's also such a pot head thing that's like not not your thing.

It's not.

No, but I was I've never been in a music because of drugs.

You know what I mean?

No, but I mean their thing is weed.

The only van that you that is like that with me is that the insane clown posse.

Is that them?

Yeah.

Is that the one you go to the festival?

Yeah.

Yeah.

I never got into them in the culture of it, but I don't I don't hate it.

You know what I mean?

I kind of was very I mean you got to be a very select person to get into the culture of insane clown posse.

But you got to be you got to use drugs or drink to have fun at that.

Yeah.

You can't go there.

The water pregnant is the most fun it looks like.

Yeah.

Well getting pregnant there.

Wow.

You're on drugs.

Yeah.

All these things work.

Yeah.

Because then you have to wait to see what the baby looks like.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think the clown makeup would be my guess.

I wonder if anybody ever did that.

I just went to a party in orgy got pregnant and had a wait.

Oh man.

I wonder how many people have like genuinely gotten accidentally pregnant together in the juggles.

Yeah.

You must have happened.

You have to wait to see what race it is.

What DNA it has.

You're getting a juggles.

It's probably white.

It's probably white and chubby.

It's white but born with dreadlocks.

He's saying clown posse.

Yeah.

God bless their hearts.

I have a new internet obsession, Bobby.

This guy makes me very happy.

I've sent you mine over the last week.

Yeah.

I didn't send you because I wanted to see your face and joy this with me.

Well, I want to see yours.

Okay.

And I love that you have these same mean you have the same different internet obsessions.

Uh-huh.

But we have internet obsessions.

Not a lot of people.

I don't know.

Like I've no one's ever said that to me the way you're.

I have.

I didn't even put a word till it.

You just said it.

Well, I've got this little kid who sings religious hymns at you.

I love him.

With his little mouth.

He's one of mine.

He freaks me the fuck out.

I love him.

We need to bring him up.

He's great.

And then uh.

I sent you mine.

The guy who puts stuff with elastics on his head.

Uh-huh.

And that's who he is.

He calls himself the man.

He calls my algorithm now.

I'm care.

I'm fraud chicken carrot baloney man.

He did.

But he puts different foods and different things on his head with elastics.

And he says that's who he is.

I'm that man.

I'm that man.

And my favorite.

He had a twinkies.

I think it was.

And mayonnaise.

And he had a watermelon on his head.

And he does it all with elastics.

Yeah.

He's all my reels.

I can't stop.

Um.

This guy.

Mm-hmm.

I'm going to call him the Jacob of Sweden.

And I'm just guessing he's Swedish.

He probably is.

I think Jacob's Swedish.

Maybe.

But this is the.

I don't know why this guy.

If you were a Swedish influencer.

This should be your dude.

You should start doing this.

But in English.

Shared off.

Cooking.

But I think this guy's voice is what gets me so much.

This is great audio.

And Lou, the first sentence.

Please make this a drop.

Because Lou is how moosh me eat here.

And he presents a healthy cooking.

I love it.

But his voice.

His voice makes me so happy.

Lasata patatas.

And that makes me laugh.

Lasata patatas.

And then he cracks the fucking thing in here.

I mean, there's something wrong with it.

I think he has a filter on.

Well, the face looks a little.

No, I think he has like a baby filter on or something.

Oh.

It's got to be that.

Start it over, please.

I love that potato.

But it doesn't break.

I contact a blink the whole time.

He's staring right through your soul.

Start it over.

Zapato patata patata.

Bona facata patatas.

Click on his page.

Go to any of his stuff.

It doesn't matter.

And the kid, the freaky kid.

I'm going to send you that.

Also, Christine.

Because the freaky kid, you have to have this kid.

I don't know.

I don't know what should happen to him.

But whatever it is, it's not right.

Whatever he is, it's wrong.

This kid.

It's like the children of the corn.

For real.

Like actual children of the corn come to life.

Jopata patatas.

Potatoes.

Potatoes.

Yeah, that's the opposite.

Jopata patatas.

They didn't make up.

There's no personal.

They were the baby face.

Oh, patata patatas.

I don't know this technology.

Filters.

I don't know what they do.

I mean, I assume you know what they are by now.

By the way, well, I get this, Bobby.

Can I tell you?

I found my dream hotel this weekend.

The Estancia Norte in San Antonio.

They have a product that they sell in the front of the hotel.

It's called House Cologne.

And they spray it aggressively in the entire hotel.

So the entire hotel sounds like there's some kind of fucking dumb dego party happening.

And they're about to say what that covers the smell of.

Weed.

Weed.

Talk about comfortably smoking in a room.

Oh, I had no concerns.

This is my boy and you're going to love him.

You're going to learn to love him.

I already think I love him.

I think this person is going to scare the shit out of Christine.

Where is my boy?

You know, she's going to join this thing.

Yeah, turn this volume up on this.

Let's see.

This kid is uncomfortable.

Oh, he's not talking to this one.

He's just staring at you with his baby face.

He's got a baby head already.

He's cooking healthy foods.

I want one.

I want one of the house.

Yeah.

Just a little fucking freaking talk like that.

Ah, Bobby.

You better do your home.

They should make the first robots this.

Yes.

It should be like, hello, Bobby.

You're going to bite the butter.

Bite the potatoes.

Not blinking little blonde twinks.

Bite the.

Bobby, how was the bonfire?

Bite the butter.

Bite the butter.

Bite the butter.

Bite the butter.

Bite the butter.

Oh, the butter.

Oh.

Damn.

He's not talking to this one at all, Christine.

This one's just straight cooking.

You found the one.

Jesus.

Pumpkin.

The butter.

The butter.

The butter.

The butter.

They haven't talked to me a little bit.

Tell me what he's doing.

We should do the whole show and hit the butter boy.

Did the butter blow that?

Did the bonfire unted it?

It's creepy music as him.

Oh, my God.

That voice fucking goes right through you, doesn't it?

Jesus.

Wow.

Yeah.

He just eats it.

Oh.

Everything's so eerie.

No, he's not talking to these ones at all.

Did he get the other thing I sent you?

Yeah.

I'm trying to get it on the computer.

Because this motherfucker, I don't know what needs to be done.

I don't know if his parents put him up to this?

No.

He found that filter and went to the laptop to his girlfriend.

No.

She went that laughter ass off.

No, not baby.

Oh, baby sweetened them.

Religious kid.

Do you mean the second coming of Christ?

Yeah.

I mean, this kid looks like his...

If you told me his father was a possum, I believe you.

He's got sharp little teeth.

Yeah.

His teeth are sharp and his mouth is the size of a fucking coke cap.

Why does he have this type of coffee?

And he just sings like fucking weird religious songs.

And at the end he goes,

Jacob, two twin men.

Maybe it's a different guy.

Oh, mine's terrifying.

Is it the guy that was trying to...

Look at him.

Oh, that's not the guy.

Oh, look at this motherfucker.

I was talking about the guy who was talking about gay marriage.

The little preacher.

No, no, no, no.

This guy...

This kid just sings...

He sings the word...

The Lord's word to you.

Go on.

Oh, baby sweetened them.

Oh.

This kid's a rodent.

He's...

He's got a hair lip, dude.

You think that's his problem?

No, yeah.

That's part of it.

But not all of it.

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Jesus Christ, I can't look at them.

Do you think this was the third?

This was the third...

This was the third whiskey twin?

This one they got rid of?

I look like that?

No, but we can make it so you did when you were younger.

If we just told people this is young little whiskey,

people might believe us.

We have the same ears.

We have the same ears.

Blue eyes.

By the way, we can also tell people this is young me.

This is what happens when people fucking

have a baby in their 40s.

Yeah, for sure.

Or if they're like, didn't do a 23 and me first

and find out they've directly related.

Yeah, that kid would have done good in like the 1800s.

They would have just killed them.

Oh my god, he just keeps going.

Looks like a monster.

Go to another one.

What was that?

Remember the movie Spartan?

What was that movie 300?

Remember the one that wanted to be a Spartan?

They were like, nah dude, you can't be.

And they made him go over the hill.

Hang on Bobby.

Bobby, there's something to explore now.

Hang on a second.

The wortlies I guess are a family of weirdos.

Oh, no, no.

Who'd do this?

Because look, first of all, go to the one that's got 95,000 views

right there.

Is that just a picture?

Because he's so terrifying looking.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, god.

Poor kid, man.

It says hashtag autism.

No.

No.

That's a hair lip.

He's got a hair lip.

And autism.

And autism.

And something else.

So I'm the very just something else.

He's got autism.

But they're really directing it in this strange, performative, religious way

that I'm not understanding.

Well, he looks like young Danny DeVito penguin.

The penguin.

Yes.

Yeah.

He was like, that's him as a kid.

Oh, this would cobble putt.

Iron, so on person.

Oh.

This is not making me want to accept Jesus.

No, no, it's actually.

It was like an evil doll came to life.

It looks like children of the corn.

Exactly.

It is children of the corn.

No, not Malachi.

Like Jacob, the main.

The main one that turns.

No, no, that's Malachi.

Oh, that's Malachi.

Yeah.

Oh, there's brother.

So he's got a brother.

His brother plays the guitars, brother whales.

By the way, all these kids were wrestling, not wrestling pro wrestling,

like local wrestling shirts.

Like high school wrestling.

Yeah.

Well, we do want to wrestle that kid.

Well, that's almost what I'm saying.

Yeah.

So they make them talk about the Lord and then they make them use retarge strength to feed

other children.

Yeah.

He just comes up and he raises two hands, his and his opponents.

That's what your sweet, normal brain max has to go against.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Max just comes out and he's snapped his neck.

Oh, do some thick skulls going to fucking kill your boy in the squared circle.

I'm going to make Max wrestling with candy.

Just slip this to him.

Bang, iron, sharpens, iron.

Max, green, damning, teen.

Don't forget the wink.

Let's see this kid play the guitar and one of the other videos.

Man, these kids are all fucking like different like rodents.

Yeah.

Oh.

Wait, no one looks good.

Scroll down.

That one looks all right.

They always have one good one.

Let me go.

Let's keep going.

That's from another marriage.

She lost everything when the other guy left.

Yeah.

And then she had nothing and then she found a religious psycho.

Yeah.

These kids are right too.

It's just the...

Well, let's hear, let's hear him jam.

Oh, God.

Sounds like...

Jesus Christ.

Sounds like Jamie Foxx's daughter.

Yep.

Baby, play that song for me, baby.

What the fuck?

Play that song.

Are you sharing his talent?

So wait a second.

Are all her kids autistic?

Yeah.

I don't think...

I think you're right.

It's going to be an old woman who just keeps queuing out kids.

Yeah, her eggs are dead.

Her eggs are done.

Yeah.

Her eggs are fucked up.

Exactly.

Yeah, but God, you can't kill it.

You can't kill it.

You got to keep it.

Yeah.

That's the problem.

That's right.

This guy heard this poor husband was blasting loads into cracked eggs.

That's why you opened the package before you fucking take it home, Jacob.

Make sure none of them are cracked.

Make sure.

Oh my God.

This is performing in somewhere where there's old folks, I think.

It's got to be in church.

And it's not a Catholic church.

It's like one of those churches where they do it in like a house.

It's just a room.

Yeah, just a room.

They rent the space.

I believe the Soul Joes does comedy there on Fridays and Saturdays.

Play, autistic kid.

Play, play.

Play, play.

Play, play, play.

Play, play, play.

Play, play, play.

Play, play, play.

Play, play, play, play.

Thank you guys for coming to my comedy special.

I've been Jamie Foxx.

It's been crying with Jamie for...

He blessed me with a stroke.

Sorry, the fucking bomb drop.

I forgot about the transition and the lights changed.

Now, let's take it down from not that funny to damn right downright serious.

He blessed me with a stroke.

He got sad.

He said, not me.

He said, not me.

He said, you did what you did to my son.

You did what you did to my son.

You did what you did to my son.

You did what you did to my son.

You see what they did to my kid?

That kid looks normal.

That can't be their kid though.

Let's see.

This guy's wearing a chalk strap on his ear.

No, that's a...

So he doesn't touch his ear like a dog?

That's his wrestling helmet, but he just put it on one ear.

Jesus fucking Christ this kid.

I saw this guy.

Little Nicole Yokech.

Did I like this?

I might have liked this because I felt bad.

Did I like it?

No.

I hope you did.

I hope I did.

Like iron, champagne, iron.

What does he say?

What does he say?

Oh, he couldn't fix his other ear.

Oh, shit.

Oh, she's whispering in the background.

That's what I'm saying.

Like this is parents like you're putting your fucking kid out there.

Yeah, they're trying to get rich off of his special needs.

Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

And here's what happens instead.

Instead of an adult who's supposed to be more responsible than that,

makes fun of your child.

Yeah, that kid right there.

With the town of 30 years of comedy experience.

That's what you've subjected your son to, lady.

That's when our eggs were fresh.

That one.

Oh, yeah.

That's a fresh egg.

Absolutely.

That's a nice hot...

Goddamn, dude.

20-28 year old egg.

Now do you accept Jesus, Christine?

With this guy?

Yeah.

Oh, she'll accept Jesus for this guy.

Oh, that must suck to have him be your older brother.

It sucks so bad.

It sucks for him too.

Every time he goes, every time he has a girl,

she's like, I want to fuck you so bad he goes.

Let's go back to your house and he goes.

Shit.

How do you feel about ghouls and goblins?

Because my house is littered with them.

How do you feel about human ferrets?

Did smells bother you?

Did you feel about a bunch of children

that look like Nazi experiments?

I think I could make a rat boy.

I think it's possible for me to make a rat boy.

I don't think that must...

That's not it.

I think he's just singing to this guy.

I don't know.

I think that's just what he wants to look like.

Oh, maybe.

Yeah.

What do we find out?

What do we find out?

That's him or actually?

There's so much of a difference.

These parents are monsters.

By the way, the wild adventures of the war-teleases

are just their strange kids yelling religious stuff for you.

These kids are going to grow up and try to get laws passed

to prevent this type of thing.

I think it's just general.

us making

No, to stop like parent. I mean there's no like child labor laws for any of this. It's like hot

It's what with a hairlet, but I do it now because they don't have a long life span. No, that kid's not long for this world

No way

God's gonna take that kid

That's why it's memorizing so you can go up there and fucking hit him with all the big hits

Hey, God and iron

Zang

St. Peter's like you still got to go over to that part of heaven, dude

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Here we go Bobby. I don't mean to go on a rant here, but

Fauci lied people died

You should store a man. I don't know how what's the things people get upset why

Jenny McCarthy told me

That she said that people who have vaccines are gonna be retarded

Did she did yeah?

Did she take it back and then put it back out of the bag out after seeing this now it's bad

Yeah, I bumped into the I bumped into the wild adventure wartlies and let me tell you don't take vaccines

I see people in mass now at the airport and they I don't know why it just annoys me. I'm just like fucking take the mask off

Stupid. Oh, yeah, well, I just can't mostly stall Asians. No, it's it's usually white couples. Oh, yeah an old white bitch

You'll fucking wear a mask

Yeah, like a lot of couples in New York, too, they're like it would be the same little mask on and it's like

I'm not looking to get sick man, but I really feel like the more you fucking

If you walk around in a mask, I mean, you're asking to get sick. Yeah, so much more often

I think because like as soon as you're not wearing it like you're so prone. Yeah, you're your immune system

You need you need to suck in some sickness. That's why when I'm waiting for my always when I'm waiting for my bag to come out from the airport

I go look at toilet seat

Airport toilet seat it's like penicillin. It's called hobo penicillin

I actually just put my tongue on the escalator railing and I but from the top and I let it go one full-round

Absolutely, and then you get a nice top layer. Yeah, and then I swallow and that top layer is probably gonna protect you from the bad

Cove. Yeah, it's gonna protect you from worldwide

Jacob, you're gonna die from the common cold because you protect yourself too much. You see

Bubble boy

Not me and Bobby. I can't get AIDS. I have AIDS on me already. I'm pretty sure I created AIDS

Yeah, I got a little bit of AIDS

So that my body reacts to the AIDS so that now it doesn't get AIDS

I created for through crabs herpes and genital warts. I created AIDS, but I am immune to AIDS because of those three things that I had

So now Bobby 23 for

Even though Jacob's like a total germaphobe and all that like you're still just covered in way more germs and the average person just from being here in the city

Yeah

Crawling with them you know as a million bug you know as a million bugs in your eyes and eyebrows. Yeah

Fucking sucks on it

Look, I still think I'm sick less than all of you. No, I've been sick at all

I'm and we travel I'm not sick either. I lick the escalator railing. I do the toilet seat

Yeah, I'm thinking about flipping out flipping around. I just think of the flipping around too

A lot of the non-sickness a lot of people look at you. Where were you going and lick a toilet?

You got a clutch first you're gonna close the door Jay. Oh, yeah, you can't just well those stalls are small

My little tussiest to stick out so I can bend over to lick

I'm not getting all my knees in a fucking public bathroom. Yeah, yeah

I've saved you all from sickness

You think so how I think the Lord did Christine. You give me Galatians 6-7 please

There you go

Oh boy

Now do you think it's harder to take that message in when it's coming through devil teeth

Cuz I don't understand the words are of peace and mercy, but I mean uh the devil. Oh god. Is that his father?

I was that who I have to fight. Oh, that's who gave it to him. Mostly you can tell either Jewish

No, not give that to us. No, that's we return from Tennessee just in time to cook up Russia shun a dinner and blow the shaffar

Come on now. Yeah, there you go Jay

Then you're people

No, they're not it's a prophetic whisper pointing us to Jesus's return. They are not okay the show far

We'll ask you a heartbeat of heaven wake this. Oh, I see this right. It's trying to draw all the Jews out so we can kill them

They think the show far will make us all run to the show bar and then you can just do a mass killing

nice

Did you hear about the mass killing

Uh, in Austin

Yeah, kill Tony

They tried to but they didn't get him

Did he get the guy? No, they get Tony. I know

Wrong bar. Yeah guy hopped out of a car and just started shooting

Is that what it was hopped out of the car shooting through the window then went in and started shooting people

And they said it might be terrorism. I've never heard that for a man shooting. Yeah. Well, I mean what are you gonna do?

I mean, they might be saying that but we did domestic terrorism. We are at war

I mean, I know the Rogan

What if

Yeah, you're right. Did that in the wrong place actually the other ones killed them. They heard the gun

Yeah, they took him out

Yeah, they repelled from the roof. They out there's the ones the the Rogan roof guys for for a 20 for a 20 minute window

the

The mother ship itself was unsafe

They had to go over and deal with something else. Yeah, I got out of a car

I believe and just started shooting with a with a gun and then went in outside the beer garden

Yeah, probably worth it. So University of Texas students

Oh

More than a dozen others injured damn. Yeah, 21. Was he 21 died? No, no

No, this is three dead and 14 injured and one of the three is a shooter. It's not that bad. That's not bad

More I thought I thought oh

Then okay, sorry. I'm sorry about the story up. I thought it was a thing. Well does defeat the purpose about

Okay, I guess we'll talk about it then

If you're you know, you can carry a gun people don't do that shit because nobody had a gun

You know, everybody's supposed to have a gun in Texas. Not that part. They knew to go to fucking Nancy, Texas

They did go to the old sissy part of town. Yeah

There's like Broadway and Nashville do its amateur hour

You're going there to go to Jason Albeen's rock and roll and cowboy all night bar

Yeah

This is a jelly roll bar now too, right? Then you get his own bar. I think they've actually got to give you a bar

He should not get a bar. She get a donut shop called the jelly roll

I don't mind that but also probably shouldn't do a bar because he's like

He's like sober. How about a bar donut shop?

Was that literally on six tree where we all always go? Yeah, this is the place man

This is jelly rolls. Yeah, that's just so sad that some of the famous person that had that bar who they're famed windaled

That's now his bar. I think it's true. I think I just do that. He's flipping around

Slip it around somebody that's gonna be kid rocks bar. What's the fitness face die? Alan Jackson

Now that's what I call fuck your mom and get out of my country bar. Yeah

You gotta do the Garth Brooks get the fuck over the border

This ain't my daddy's America

Yeah, they died, but we uh

Yes, we went to war

With who confused?

No, we're war right now with what?

With uh, we were with Kevin Brennan the dabbleverse the dabbleverse. Yeah, the dabbleverse

I don't want to be a war with dabbleverse. We went to war. They went to war the dabbleverse

Went to war and we went to a war with Iran and and Lewis went to war with some guy

On Facebook about story wars. There was a lot of war this weekend. Yeah, yeah

Bobby had to explain the dabbleverse to me. Yeah, the dabbleverse is going out at this fighting

I don't understand the dabbleverse. It's out of my and by the way

I'm not right. I don't want the smoke of the dabbleverse. It's a multi-front war

Apparently even DJ Lu almost got a little shrapnel when I heard today really end up saying he was nice

What happened? You almost got you got caught in the dabbleverse? Well, he didn't say his name

But he was talking about he was talking about uh

How he used to bitch out

Kevin was someone being used to bitch out Corielli all the time

when he would come on

Pete and

Brewer and he said he would bitch out uh, Pete and and Pete Corielli was like a

A pussy about it and took it and then eventually he said the producer over there

He said it because he goes he goes he works over there with big J now

He was the producer was like can you take it easy on

On Pete a little bit as I was to probably keep going to Pete so hard

And but then he goes and that guy's a nice guy. Oh, thank God. He didn't catch too much. Thank God

Hey extra Kevin Brennan texted me uh for your number Jay about six months ago. I didn't give it to him

You're gonna get you're gonna get back you're gonna get sucked in the dabbleverse to relax. Oh

You should you should you to call me. Oh, I said give it to him

You should have it. Yes, he has it but the same number since

That's a guy who has had a lot of phones broken

Yeah, but I was like literally I've had the same phone numbers since I was 18

I guess they did a 19 19 I guess danger field uh had uh

Stuttering John who's in the dabbleverse headlining so I found out we've just know I've done a little research

We did a little bit on skanks on a pre-record episode

It's called the dabbleverse. Yeah, because of stuttering John right

And I think later because they say he dabbles in comedy. Yeah, I think it's the ultimate thing and then uh

surely

No, but it wasn't sure it was apparently Chrissy mayor

Individually another comic

um

Chrissy mayor had said

Um, she called it the dabbleverse like the and then river all revolving around making fun of stuttering John

But now it's grown into a thing where he sold out danger fields Rodney's now

But it was all people that went to see him bomb. Oh, well they organized it that way. Yeah, yeah

Yeah, the organizers like come watch him eat shit. So

Kumiya flew up. Kumiya flew up. Uh Brennan was there

Geno was on the show hi pajaric from the stern show. Yeah, Geno. Geno and his wife were on the show. They were on the show

Geno and Brennan go at it

Do they yeah, I can see that. Oh, yeah, well if you go to I think Brennan

Yeah, he came up and

Had video of Geno and Geno was fucking with him because he was trying to fuck with Geno

Geno was fucking back with him okay

And then everyone's everyone's in their mid-50 so then they had they had Anthony Kumiya actually Brennan might be in his 60s

They had he's in his 60s. They had a Kumiya bring up John stuttering John in a fucking crazy way

John went up and just read

Kumiya's report

Slow down, slow down the story talk as you were saying there's this video that stuff too. Yeah

He went up there and just read which is pretty kind of funny

It says on the back of the paper it says pockumentary

Part one making fun of Kumiya's face. It's kind of funny

Fuckumentary maybe like I saw that on the paper

But then he just started reading like the his police reports of his domestic shit domestic violence

With

Yeah, Vinnie's daughter

This was the clip of him getting mad. It was outside of Rodney. No, what happened so before the show

Kumi was out getting a little accolades because you know Kumi is still famous did happen before the show

The thing with Kumiya happened before the show did it. Yeah, but he was outside

He was talking to somebody signing something and you know, he was he was buzzing feeling good

getting accolades and

He so this guy walks up to Kumiya with the camera in his face

Kumiya had no idea because when you get an accolage, you don't know who's who and he immediately

brings up the girl's name some girls name. I don't need proper name. I think he just starts going

He just starts calling him like a pedophile and a creep. No, no, he brought up a screen name of a

transgendered

transgendered porn star, okay, who apparently I know I know I've had him on podcast. Who?

Her name is they said I forget her name. She had her barely Jay and Jay McBride on my podcast a long time ago

It was like all trans girls. She came in very freak

I know very weird. She came in and had a Russian accent. Uh-huh, and

I didn't know her never talked to her

She came in to be on the show, but did a Russian accent the whole time on the show and said she was from Russia

But she's not she's just a regular American. Did you say that when the show was over?

Least or she she left that night letting you believe she left letting us believe she's Russian

I believe who knew that fucking that porn stars like an Ali G

Yeah, dude who's so fucking wearing her commitment to the character is fantastic. And uh, yeah, that's her right there

Yeah, she's a nice kid. What's your name and uh

Sue Lightning I believe it's who lightning is her screen name. So apparently

There's something on reddit and I did a little research that maybe Kumia might have hooked up with her or something

But this guy opens up with her name. Okay. Kumia. Fuck this trans person. I don't know the details. Uh, this is just

Rumors on reddit, which you know bullshit. Why are they what are they born out of? I don't know. Maybe I don't know

I don't know what they're born out of but where a room is born out of

I don't know facts

I mean, it might have been runoff from hanging with Jim Norton for many years

I mean he could he could have the old conversation like Jim show me the ropes

Yeah, I mean look what a big fat thick ropes have come that get on your back from guys

Look what happened to Derosa. I mean, that's a runoff from hanging out with Jim and you're making it okay

You're right. I was this close to Bailey Jay

Her cock-blocking husband ruined everything man you and all your friends can't wait to fuck chicks with this

Maybe I'm just a different generation. Yeah, it's it's what one generation away Jay

One generation away from fucking chicks with this

It was cool in the late 90s. It really missed me somehow

It really it really surpassed me the one-of-fuck-a-guy with tits

It's like it skips a generation

Yeah, it's all over you. Oh, you're right. It might also have people that partake

Everybody loves you. You know you lucky bastard. Yeah, look at me lugging out not loving cock

Hey silly bastard. I guess I was born in the right time

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So the video of him getting into the fight this guy kind of set him up said that name out of the gate

You can see him kind of like oh shit

Whatever you get a little taste of him talking about not fucking her

Was that him not fucking right three videos on it. So I want to know which one you have any videos of him fucking her

I'll look

Oh, that's Carl from who are these podcasts. Yeah. Yeah, like all those guys are in on it

They fuck with each other and that's like the they all get viewers and money off for YouTube by

Trashing each other part of me likes to think that they're all when I saw Chad zoom off down in Tampa last time

I was down there part of me and mom was like come on man. It's you guys like no

Do you and Gino fucking hate each other and everyone hate like wants to

sabotage house each other careers like come on. I think come on. I don't really mean this. I think it's wrestling. I think it's heel

It may heal. Well, it must be because how is kumia allowed to introduce if see if starting Johnny all these guys hate each other

How are they doing the show like like Gino's on the show?

They bought tickets. They bought tickets and he

Everybody in the crowd loved kumia and hated John

So they were chanting his name to go up and introduce him. So he did

Right, but I'm almost saying they're just no like

They wouldn't just let that happen at the seller is my point. Oh, no, but they wouldn't run Rodney's yeah

I guess I haven't been since it's changed. Yeah, I mean, they don't they don't actually I did

We did a watchman called we did story wars there once. Yeah, I think it's oh, it's a great beautiful club now. I look it looks great

but

So apparently this happened and then they went then they went in he went in after that and then they started the show

And then there's a bunch of stuff that happened with Kevin Brennan Kevin Brennan's actually in this shot

Uh, oh, yeah, he's watching and by the way, I think Kevin Brennan might possibly shake the guy's hand afterwards because the guy

Because what I saw was there's some aftermath is the guy who filmed Anthony kumia and Anthony kumia for I mean

If you know this show, you'd have to assume you know, fuck Anthony kumia is open Anthony show

um

Which McCall when he gets to know it with this guy afterwards the guy starts doing like a

He really popped his lid there, huh? I guess

I don't know what the problem was all I did was say that he's a pedophile and start pointing out a

Hardcore things that he's done wrong with chance people

Yeah, and then said it and then accused him of fucking a trans person like I don't know what he snapped over

It's crazy and he's like well, it's good to see you guys

And I think he starts to shake his hands with people outside that like I think Kevin Brennan maybe but I don't know if I

That'll know for sure he tries to shake his hand for sure. I don't know if anybody shakes his hand. Yeah, this guy was

Immediately trying to pop him off his own shit. Yeah, he's trying to get his own clicks. Yeah

So sad man. Yeah, I mean in that you know who follows it a lot who's a fan of me the dabble verse beside you

Dr. Steve. Oh, yeah, but they have like

dabble verse conventions, I think where they go. Yeah, where they go up. Yeah, Vegas. They go to like Vegas

Yeah, I'm confused, but then they did one hang on then they did one up in like upstate New York

But I was like but apparently it was like a bad like when they got there was like a shi motel

That like was attached to like a little performance. I was like everyone's got there was kind of like it's actually sucks

Yeah, they do roast and shit like that, but they all here's a thing

But they do have their own little like a thing carved out and I gotta say like if you know the people and

Decide to know who the people are like it's definitely a fun background. It's not not entertaining

Yeah, I tell you what I mean there was this week on head between the war and I ran or the dabble verse

and the dabble verse one

That'd be and Lewis fighting people on the internet was right there in the mix. I didn't see that. Oh god

He's he was he was going he goes at it. We do about what he's book. He he known on Twitter

Twitter. He was going because of the story wars episode that I was on

With that guy

People were giving him shit because he

He was bitching about bitching to him about the game like how see?

Hey, man, if you don't take the game series the the game doesn't work

Yeah, you have to take the game and people like do fuck off

It's just a podcast just a game and he was like no dude and they were attacking. Well, here's the thing

It's a damn if you do damn if you don't and Lewis probably jumps in too much sometimes knows things to even go

It's the same thing I felt I told you when I was doing the live streams

The one I was like I'll play fortnight to start this one off

And then some people are like yes, dude fucking video games and Jay this is the best thing

And then some people are like dude do the body cams this sucks

You're never gonna play so you're not gonna please everybody so things if you run to try or you can get in those like

Twitter things the idea that is like right there because Lewis is right on both ends

I've said we mean Lewis. I'm not argued

But I mean we've definitely debated I go buddy. This isn't that bigger fucking deal

Some of this thing he goes now some people take the game really seriously and then I see things like this weekend a guy was like

He was like Jay goes you're going for the dynasty three in a row, huh?

And then some guy next to him was like dude. I didn't watch the new one yet man spoiler alert man. I was like

Well the whole thing about the put the my mind. It's a comedy podcast

It's a comedy podcast, but the thing that story wars the why I think it's probably the funnest show to do is because

It takes a hold of you

You want to win that thing inside you that's competitive you want to win and when I see you over when I was playing

And I saw you over there and had a chance to win and steal it away from you

Your third or fourth victory. Yeah, and I got to be a three-time storyward champion. Uh

I wanted it more than anything in my life

Yeah, and uh and you you you got me dude you got me a couple times and I was legitimately mad at your lies

You lied to my face three times. It's game. Yeah. Yeah, not a game. Oh Anthony denies

This is funny. This is from as I was googling. This is from eight years ago

Yeah, this has been following him for a while. This is when I met her

I had her on my podcast

With uh with Bailey and them. I had like a transgender, you know podcast and I think they met her

They kind of she was in that that world of us. That's what I say when people ask me if people aren't familiar to go

They go what is uh, you know what dude? It's transgender podcast

I mean, I'm the first comic to have trans

The leading transgender podcast in podcasting. It really is. Here we go. Oh, that's her. Yeah

That's that's Bailey J's husband Matt who I'm very close with a great guy

Cock blocker, but great guy

I mean Bailey J's I mean she look at her tits. She's amazing

So the one on the left is uh

Sue Lightning. That's the girl

Who the guy breaks up, but you can hear everyone in this room has a cock look how

Everybody but some bigger than others I know

Let's go. Let's go but stills got the finest fatdest ass though. It's funny. I forgot column was on that who's a little dabble or

Who's on the edge? Oh, yeah, he's a trans dabble first

Go to the beginning when I introduce her though her accent is so I was so fucking free. Look a little fat Bob

Was that my fifth fat?

Look at look at how fat I was

That's deep who

You really at too hard of a commitment to no facial hair

Yeah, I know who would have saved you who would have made you feel better a couple of those years

You know, but I I didn't like it because it made me look real Mexican

You know, well with the thin

You ever see that photo? I look like an evil cattle rancher in Mexico

Do you have a frame picture of Nick the Paula behind you? Uh, no. No, that's uh Bill Murray

Somebody a fan gave that to me now that all that whole studio is made up from blankets by the way

That's that's known as apartment and trans and trans and cocks

The go look it wow. No, this boy. Let's hear what kumiya says about

I let me just see if I go I want to just hear accent real quick. It's right here. I just don't get you to make a train

That's what the boy

Bob, I can tell you she says if you could change

She could change

And then he says that everybody could change also

And she she's definitely not fully changed, but she's

If I could change you could change here's doctors is more

Bobby's getting his dick turned to a pussy

It's so sad to me that I don't have the biggest dick in that room

Well, you are the prettiest girl. Thank you

Um

I have to do the that's not true. The one that Anthony fuck maybe the prettiest one. No

Pretty no, yeah, no, you barely jays the hottest. She's more natural. Billy. J's does a whole thing

Billy J's got like droopy tits those are fucking great. That guy on the left's a hotter chick. No way the guy

I mean the Bailey on the right is the hottest chicken. There's only one Bailey in the room

Looking you get nervous when you think about her. I do

Oh god palms are sweating. You're so hot for fucking chickcock

Let me see your penis. Chris. Please see what in his penis. I mean, Bailey J's penis is I would say

The P word. I don't like it. Why?

You don't like it. I don't like it. I'll tell you why

Size king. It's not big enough for you. It's not big enough. It's too big. It's not too big, but you haven't seen big dick

She mails on reddit. Yeah, yeah, you're right. It's not that's when she showed it in the studio

I remember thinking this isn't big enough for Jay. Bailey J didn't show it in the studio. Yeah, she did

Bailey J was here in the studio. Yeah, you're trans straight Jacob. You're talking about me. It is about me

It's about didn't show it and she has a whopper. She has a whopper

So fat. Okay, 18 minutes in. She talks. How are you?

It's a fake gadget

Fuck this guy

This guy's an asshole

I really was a queen chaser

Which is the girl that came in here and you sketched her would burt. That's a row. That's a row

It's a it's offensive to me and that was a little yeah, that one wasn't nowhere big

That's a little teeny pecker. Yeah, I would say that pecker was so small. I may have fucked her

I would have sucked it while you fucked her

Probably like so, but if I'm gonna go full blown fucking gay trans food

I'm gonna get blasted in a smithereen. It's by a big fat barrel

I want to fucking two hands fucking why talk shit. Don't get it. Don't get that little bird out of here

But you gotta get it hard to something up with it hard. No, there's something up with a small dude

Look at little bird look at no click it hard

But anyway, if you're that fan in your dick is that small you don't even have like a fat excuse. You should become a woman

Well, I guess deep who didn't like it when it was uh when it was a hard pecker was something weird. He said there you go

Oh, yeah, that's what I think it's zoom in please proceed. Can somebody put Jacob's face on that?

That's what I think Jacob's penis would look like. I think it's what my penis looks like no

Yeah, really let me see it. I think it's what my penis looks like. I think it's probably pretty

Close to what my penis looks like

A bear naked she a bear naked thin she-mail

I have the dick of a bear naked thin she-mail. Yeah, I'm telling you

She might have fixed. I have a I have a dick very similar

So apparently he brought up this

Anthony you could see him. I don't know if you can notice, but he does a little there's a little like fuck you

Hang on Bobby. I'm getting a little bummed out here

Thinking that I have the penis size of someone who takes hormones so their penis gets smaller

The penis I'm someone who aggressively takes medications to stop their penis from growing it all goes into your penis and not into your balls

All right, is that look at that big wanker. She's tugging on now. That's a Wang

To be hilarious if you start own a sticker on this Anthony's apartment

So yeah, so the guy brought her up and then

Then uh, yeah, the guy outside the comedy club Rodney's goes who's Sue Lightning and then

pedophile pedophile Anthony goes, you know, it's like oh, it's a transgender woman

You got one of it and then uh, he starts saying your pedophile piece of shit

I don't know this club was letting pieces of shit or whatever and then

Kumi just keeps asking who are you and then when he calls him a scumbag

Kumi are like

Ticks his glasses I guess and throws him down. Well, I think he thought he had met a glasses on

I think he he learned that in some type of nerd karate school

What you want to do you take the glasses off the face and throw them as odd as you can on the ground

Say what you will guy didn't do shit back though. He couldn't see

Someone tell me what should I do

So funny though Anthony when he threw them down with such rage. Yeah, he walked and he almost falls over

Oh, yeah, he's angry and then it's it's such a weird camera shot on him because like the guys got are gonna

Chess as like Kumi is like when he's a point stone is like fucking cunt

Um, it's pure rage. I take dub for Kumi though

If that was before the show particularly even yeah, when I said he had a full win there

Yeah, but he should if you're gonna grab something grab the camera and that would better than Lewis's fight

Well, then they the the cops came into the show the reason why this I knew this happened before

The cops came into the show and took Kumi out of rodneys and took him out on the street and question him

Yeah, because this guy called the cops. Yeah had video of the assault in question. Yeah, if that's uh if that's an assault

And then Kumi was you could hear Kumi telling him he called me a pedophile

Yeah, and a pedophile. Yeah, I mean he kept saying pedophile that's slander

That's slander when you say pedophile

And the cops are just like why are we here? We have more shit to worry about. Oh, there's Brennan right there

I know the joke of like like I don't understand like where those accusations came from yeah with him

Like if it was just like internet rumors or some situation or anything that like yeah

By the way

Like Kevin comes over like Ebenezer's screwed with a fucking gown a gatorade with him

Yeah, he should have really going. You should have in the original constitution

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It's so funny to be around these guys for so long and then to see them and they're just we're getting old

Well, that's what it is. It's something to see and getting all excited

I was around compliment Kevin first came back from LA

Because he wasn't here for a couple years when I was up here. Yeah

And then he came back and he started being again new york again like he was still I would say like uh

Like you know, well, you're younger. Of course, then he was like still like a handsome dude. I guess hair hair comb back kill every night. I used to killed

Um, but there you go. So it's still fucking hilarious. So I said all these these uh

This is fun. This is funny. I didn't know

I was just watching Anthony the guy that he was signing something for is Kevin

I yes, I didn't know that so apparently he goes to shake Kevin's hand and Kevin's like fuck you

Doesn't shake his hand. Yeah, so play this play this. Yeah

All right, can you stop it right there if you go back and

If you go back if we're you know those people that can look at people's facial expressions and be like

Oh, this just happened. Oh, yeah

Go back one second and just play without sound and look at it when he says transgender woman

He you could see oh fuck. Yeah, I mean a thing well see your heart starts pumping. Yeah, could you like fuck?

I'm in a thing. I mean the same thing would happen to me if someone said that to me. Yeah

You get exposed. Yeah, who's winning is I don't know. She's ugly. I guess who's who Sarah Bigdick

A transgender why

Who's Cassandra baby arm

That's Jay's trans girlfriend

Yeah, who's big ball Bobby

All right, go back, go back, go back. I never saw you know, but it was there too

I didn't the whole dabble versus around him. No, the whole thing is around

Well, it was a dumb move for this guy to make this kind of move right here

I mean balls out to a thing like you're a piece of shit. I'm like

Like I wonder what his personal thing was it means just trying to get clicks obviously

But even that like again to play victim after anything like that when you if you do that

It seems like you're an idiot if you think you're not gonna get cracked in the fucking head and I think the cops

I think that's what you want the cut of course

I think the cops should also go I think the cops should watch this guy

But this guy came to get getting ahead and he got hit in the head

Yeah, and I think the cops should walk away from that. I think that the invention of the video on a phone

Has made all these fucking nerd losers

That used to just get a beating back in the 90s. Well, I don't even got a beating

I think they wouldn't have done that. Yeah, they wouldn't have done it at all

And now they do it because they know they have video evidence and they can fucking sue somebody or get get him arrested

You know, yeah, I can say whatever I want things like you can't say whatever you want

But there's there's consequences for it sometimes. Yeah, but you got to take the phone listen

I might be my soul taken tonight from being in front of that kid with the fucking possum teeth

No, what if we both it's not right that I did that will we both wake up with the same faces him tomorrow

Like freaky Friday. That's what happens to you. He gets your face, but you get his and you have to go find him

I need my faith back. I have to remember. I have to reverse the spell. I've got a gig this weekend. I gotta do skankfest

Mass you seven twelve

Hey

Look at this by the way the fans the fans of the world though

I mean, you are definitely like skank festi looking people for sure, so but I'm not throwing stones

It is just fine when you turn it as the guy goes won't you fuck off scumbag. It's exactly who you thought

I was gonna be standing there. I don't even know who that is

But it's just like if you were like hey draw who's gonna stick up for kumi at first

You just dropped me over and over

Hey fucking scumbag

Well, it's oh you definitely open the other fans because they're all older. You know what I mean? Oh, yeah

Well, this guy is this is Stevie Lou. He used to be skanks guys. He's wearing a I think he's wearing the Lewis is a pedophile shirt

That's ironic

Oh, it's hilarious. Look at Kevin in the background though. He's so happy. It just happened. He's got his fucking evidence of scrooge glasses on

His end of his nose

All right slow down

I thought he just took his glasses and threw him. He did he didn't I mean, I mean, he may have caught him on the lip

My point is also because he ain't baby. Yeah, I mean, what a fucking weeness. Yeah, cuz I'll tell you what if it was a situation

He thought he could have like easily won a fight. He would have fought too

His thing was not to fight because he's like well, I'm not gonna win this. Do you know what I'm saying? It's like this guy

The guy. Yeah, I got a bloody lip. Yeah, well this guy this guy does this though. I've seen other videos of this guy

And he this is his thing. Yeah, he gets people to flip out punch him and do something

Yeah, he just wants to make people erupt

And he got he got cool me a cool me. He was having a blast. I could erupt on something like this though. Yeah, I know you can for sure

Yeah, you hit me and Christine. That's right. Yeah, and you guys refuse to straighten out. All right, whatever dude. Sorry

Paul does

Wait, wait, you started over

I started over. Yeah, fuck it. Cool. Yeah, there's other there's other footage of

Kumi. I have this here. This is him getting removed. This is him talking to the cops. Yeah, that's him going to go to the remove

It's so funny to see and Kumi getting pulled out by the cops again. It's so fine

Kumi doesn't give a fuck

They're plotting

See I

They're taking him out. Well, well, Geno's wife's getting off stage. Yeah

That's Julie. Uh, no, Julie. I don't know if Julie was there. I don't think he was there. I didn't hear about Julie being there

Bob Levy was there though. Yeah, Bob Levy was there.

Gina, but she's all the dabble versus people. Yeah, Jacob. Bob Levy familiar with the Reverend Bob Levy. I'm learning

Yeah, well, I guess him and him and uh

Kevin don't get along

I think it depends on the week, but it's been a while. Yeah, it's been a minute. They've done shows together a bunch. Yeah, they did a show together for a minute

So, um, yeah, though, I mean

That's him being his quarterback. Here's him talking to the police. It's him talking to the police. It's another person filming. Yeah

accusations

Better you better feel you know, by the way, there's no stance

Poor Anthony. There's no stance to stand to make it seem like you're being casual about this like what's the big deal

It's like the hands on the shoulders or the hands on the hips don't look right like I don't know something about pedophilia

It's also funny because it's got to be like he's explaining the cops who have no idea, but it's like these are things like

Like he's making a face like there's no

Yeah, rationale behind anything. It's like Anthony Kumi's never going like I mean his girlfriend was like way younger than it

It was just why they would say that so like something about pedophilia and like I don't know like I think they said racism

Like he's like he's probably goes I don't know they were yelling like

Race that sounds weird to me though, but I guess they were doing racism. I don't know

I didn't know they were talking about me at first. He said accusations, which is plural

But he only brought up singular he didn't bring up the trans

You know, is that he didn't go trans girl? Yeah, I never get in my ass because uh look truth be told

I may have chugged this chick's balls a couple years back

But they were going on me the dick wasn't that big so I don't consider it a little tiny penis though

So I don't really count it doesn't keep me up at night

Little tiny beater

What do you do with a trans with that little wiener? Do you uh

You suck it real quick. Is that you don't you just suck it real quick, but I'm saying but do you do just do you just fuck her butt

No, you just take your dick and you put it under her dick and you go that's a dick you put her

Oh, yeah, first, top of your dick. Absolutely. I will absolutely shame her dick with my dick

You're gonna look at this little girl dick look at this big man dick right here slightly thicker maybe not even longer

Yeah

I'm in hard

Oh, we got to take a break there a little bird is the reason I don't take pictures of my bird

She's labeled a whole career out of it. I think my I wouldn't be confident showing my dick if I was trans

I

Still be like I'm a pretty girl. Don't look at my little dick. It sucks

Did we guys asking for their money back?

I guess I think that's what I say about trying I'm with you

Bobby Kelly's gonna be at the verb and where is that summerville, New Jersey March 19th and then the comics Roadhouse in Connecticut

April 17th and 18th after that. He's gonna be an uncle Vinnie's in New Jersey Cleveland, Ohio, New Orleans

For tickets and all other tour we do in New Orleans

I'm doing a little run of like a couple clubs down there like a raw a theater two theaters

Okay, okay, there's no comedy club. Yeah, I'm doing some theaters down there. I wanted to go to New Orleans

I was a skanks last year. I had such a blast or is no comedy so I talked to my boy over there and

He hooked it up. We're gonna have a good time

The venue that it's listed and you only have one up right now howl and wolf. I really like that place

Yeah, that's a fun spot. Yeah, I'm excited to go down there. I haven't been this since uh skankfest

Before that it was with nicked Apollo and it's white only so that's weird

Well, no, we changed that. We had to change that. It's the last place. It's white only this white only

And trans you can have trans and we can have some um blacks all trans welcome as long as you're big dicks there

Actually, I want little dicks. Oh and little dick ones for Bobby

Check out his YouTube Robert Kelly comedy in every Tuesday night

You can see him live at the fat black pussycat lunch at the comedy store sit

Ah, yeah, baby. Uh, make sure you show up god damn it big J. Ocasin will be a cobs comedy club in San Francisco this weekend

Uh, the sixth and the seventh after after he's gonna be at the comedy zone in Jacksonville March 13th and the 14th after that

He'll be in Madison Phoenix, Tempe St. Louis

He's touring every weekend people make sure you go check him out bigj comedy dot com

YouTube dot com slash at big J. Ocasin for everything else. Uh, we'll be right back. It's the bonfire

So bring you a little your little tranny dicks back bring your toses bring your toses and your dinkies

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