Bonus - The Medievalist's Guide to Easter w/ Eleanor Janega (Preview)

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So, I mean, Easter is the reason for Christianity, basically.

You know, there is so much now pomp and circumstance specifically around Christmas that you can

be forgiven for not necessarily considering that fact.

Fundamentally, you can't have Christianity without Easter because it is the celebration of when

your boy in mind, not Danny's, JC, Jesus Christ himself rose from the dead, right?

And so, as a result, this is kind of the day that makes you a Christian.

And, you know, you could, in theory, you know, like Muslims consider that Jesus was a prophet

and be like, oh, Christmas, that's, that's cool because we can all agree he was born, right?

But not everyone can agree that he rose from the dead after being executed.

So, it really is the thing that Christians should be concerned with and indeed are concerned with,

especially as you were mentioning Derek in the earlier Christian period and certainly in the

Middle Ages. To the point that, you know, a great deal of time is spent if you are an early

medieval monk just calculating when Easter is going to be because it is a movable feast

as the very, very pleasant statement is. So, we have all of these very complex calculations

that are done that will just tell you, oh, Easter will be on this day this year.

Easter will be on that day that year. And so, that's something that's always kind of like

first and foremost in Christian's minds. And these calculations surviving to us in the number

that they do tells us just how important this is to these guys. And, you know, you could also kind

of like understand it from their perspective. You know, the consumerism hasn't been invented yet,

right? Like, no one really even gives presents at Christmas. And Easter is kind of like one of the

big blowouts. Like, a Christmas is a much longer festival for earlier Christians and medieval

Christians. It's like, it goes for like a month. And you just like keep feasting because that's

all anybody ever does. But you kind of get to do that because you can't go outside because it's too

cold and there's nothing to do, right? Easter is your big old festival that you get to have when

food is back, which is very exciting. Food is nice. We like food. Yeah. Yeah. So, you know, it becomes

a really big deal. And I mean, part and parcel of that, of course, is the celebration beforehand,

which is the lented fast, which is equally important. Because really, I mean, it's this time of

year in the Christian calendar when the story of Jesus really kicks off, right? Because, you know,

if you read the Bible, it starts off with Christmas, yay, hooray, Christmas. He's born brilliant.

And then there is like something, something, something the presentation. Big missing gap.

And then 30 year question mark. And then like, he goes out and he finds the homies, right? Like,

that's, that's what he does. And then he gets arrested for being a communist. But we were,

he gets arrested for being a communist. He realizes that he's going to get killed. And so as a result,

he goes out into the desert for 40 days to really think about life and to fast and pray and kind

of prepare himself for death. And then that is what Christians are meant to mirror during a

length. So he goes out, he hangs out on the desert. Obviously, the devil shows up because you know

how he is. So he shows up and he tempts Jesus and was like, you know, what do you want? Do you want

a hamburger? How about some sexy girls? What's that live deliciously? You know, he does the whole,

he does the whole thing. And Jesus is like, no, Satan, like, I am all about the revolution. No,

thank you. And then Satan's like, damn, you got me. Then he shows back up. He will then proceed

into Jerusalem on the back of a donkey with people waving palms over him. That is your palms

Sunday. And then you get your holy week. All right. So your holy week, you will, especially

still like Catholics will do this, but in the medieval period, they definitely did this. What you

do during a holy week is you cover up all images in the church. So like, you don't get to look at

Jesus. All right. No, looking at Jesus while he's dead. Okay. And then you start thinking about

what happened. So first he is arrested in the garden. Then he is put on trial. And so then you do,

for example, the stages of the cross, things like that on good Friday. Then he's dead. Okay.

We could all agree Jesus is dead on a good Friday. On Saturday, holy Saturday, he descends into hell,

which is something that people forget about now. Like everyone is kind of like, I don't know what

he's doing on Saturday, presumably chilling, but he is doing a very important thing. I mean,

I think I have a nap for, I mean, wow, you know, but yeah, it's like a really good image. You know,

he busts down the doors and this is very important to medieval scholars because their contentious

that what he does is he's going into hell. It's called the heroine of hell. And he is getting out

everybody who was in their life virtuous, but because he hadn't come to save everyone from sin,

they're all in hell, right? So that could be Moses, that could be Plato, right? That could be

Aristotle. And so you could be a virtuous pagan or a virtuous Jewish person, that sort of a thing.

But your boy JC goes and gets out of jail there because he's like, yeah, sorry, I'm late.

I'm here now, which is quite interesting because the majority of humans are in hell, I guess at this

point in time, you know, if we consider that, you know, with a human record begins kind of like

1.7 million years before this. So like most of them down there. But Jesus gets about, it's pretty

chill. And then he shows back up on Sunday and that that's Easter. And we find out that he is back

because the three Mary's, his mum Mary, Mary Magdalene, and then also like the Mary who's

always like chilling in the house listening to him are like going to him balm his body a little

bit more and they get there and an angel is like, guess what girls hot to cha? He's not here anymore

and that everyone goes, oh shit. And then he shows back up. And that's pretty cool for everyone.

And so this is the thing that is kind of promised within Judaism and which Christians claim has come

to fruition. And there is the bifurcation in the two religions as it were. So really you can't

have Christianity without the idea that Jesus has come back. He is the Messiah. He has come to like

rid the world of sin and die for us. So therefore Easter should be the big holiday. But unfortunately,

you know, early Christians failed to consider Black Friday. So it's just, we just think about

the classic. We're into a prophet. Yeah, a classic failure. So Eleanor, before we die further into

the Christian cosmology, I'm going to ask the undergraduate question, which is what are the sort of

Middle Eastern precursors to this holiday? Do we know if there are any or is this more of a Christian

invention? What about particularly, I'm thinking, I deserve a very specific Jewish component to it,

not that I want to ask about, but in a different context. So yeah, go ahead. Yeah, and you can

take that question however you want to direct feel free to add to finger it as we say.

Hey, all right. No, I have a follow up though. I'm not going to ask you completely.

But the thing about Christianity and the idea that someone has descended into the underworld and

has triumphed over death is that this is not a new idea. And indeed, the first ones to ever do it,

our friends, the Mesopotamians, they have a story about the triumph over death. And this is when

Ishtar or Inana goes down to the netherworld to prove a very important point and triumph over death.

That story is a lot more bonkers. Like it's not even clear why she does it. She's just like,

check this shit out. And then when the smoke clears, it's unclear what sort of move she was trying

to do, essentially. But as she goes down there, she was how maxing she was. She was. And it's like,

at every gate, she's like, hey, let me in. It's your girl, Inana. And everyone's like,

what the fuck are you doing here, girl? And she's like, no, hear me out. Hear me out. And eventually,

she's killed. She ends up being resurrected because she has a scheme wherein her backup,

like her understudy creates a new kind of sexy being that is just intensely sexy and hot.

And he seduces Erish Kagal, the goddess of the underworld. And she's like, damn, I'm so sprung

for this newly invented type of being. And then he's like, okay, girl, now that I've like,

dicks you down, you have to give me the water of life that's hanging over there. And she's like,

cursus. The wow, he knew he knew about the water of life all along. And then Ishtar is sprinkled

with the water of life. And she returns to heaven. And why she needs to do this? I don't, that's not

clear, right? It's not clear because it doesn't save anyone. All it proves is that she can do it.

Right, like she's the best ever.