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COACHING SESSION: Boys Adrift: Why Boys & Men Turn to Video Games and What to Do About It
About this Episode
2:20 "If you haven't played video games in the last 10 years, they have become more addictive. The people who create games, and other media, are strategically using their knowledge of psychology and neurology in their favor. In schools, competition is being removed and discouraged and many boys are turning to video games.
7:17 From your experience, being married, raising boys, and working with boys, what have you perceived boys want and need? Tony Robbins teaches every human being has 6 basic needs. Boys and men turn to video games to try and fulfill one of them! As moms, we must remember boys have different desires and motivations. Allow boys to be boys without giving them a pass to be barbarians.
12:34 Boys are turning to video games for a reason. As mothers you need to remember they’re doing it to fulfill a drive or desire we may not understand. Boys will often prefer to be alone, or with other boys, playing video games more than engaging with girls.
19:55 What keeps evil at bay? If your needs are being met you won’t seek out unhealthy or immoral vehicles. The sheep hate the sheepdogs as much as they hate the wolves.
24:50 Certain men have this "will to power." Those types are more likely to be addicted to video games than to engage in a useful career. Video games give a dopamine hit where you feel you achieved so much, but really you just sat on your butt! The REAL price of greatness in the real world takes far more effort than in the virtual one.
32:10 Violent video games affect ADD, risk-taking, obesity, personality, and dehumanizing. There’s also a connection with pornography. Non-violent games too. "All we can think about is Minecraft, we don't even want to go outside and play anymore." Not every boy gets addicted, but for those that do, it is critical to watch out.
42:40 We want our boys to put in the effort to become REAL men! We NEED to create environments that let them develop those skills! Make their lives more fulfilling, adventurous, stimulating, and competitive than video games!Examples: martial arts, sports, trips, adventures, races, camping, fishing and more!
46:40 It can be tough to get kids to do those things when they have the option of video games. The kids who spend all day on games are the ones you must worry about and invest in the MOST! Control the headgates until your children can manage it themselves! When you take away games you need to FILL that void with something meaningful.
55:24 Support the working energy wherever your boys are excited, as long as it's good work! As they get older you’ll need new strategies! You NEED to invest in your family in BIG ways! Start today with the small things and plan today for the big things!
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