DAMTT- ladiesbeshoppingforpeace, Comfort Dolly, and Scary Jamie

0:00Don't ask me to talk. Yeah! And welcome, welcome, welcome to yet another exciting edition. I've don't ask me to talk. I'm one of your podcast pals. I'm Eric Reiner. Hey everyone. Hello, hello. I am the other one. I'm Stacy Heller. And I am... I'm in good mood today. Yay! Right, last week was... I was sort of not doing as well. Well, that's right. Yeah, you were recovering from some food poisoning or something along those lines that had gave you the rumblies anyway. Yes. But you definitely seemed like you were in a good mood last week regardless of that. So if you're feeling better, then that's fantastic. Yes, I'm totally feeling better. I went back to the same restaurant last night because I'm no quitter.

1:04Got back on that horse meat. I did. Well, okay. No, but like, but yes. They don't serve horse meat, Eric. It's a French restaurant. You never know. This is true, actually. It's like horse patting, you know, because it's Texas. Yeah, no. So I'm feeling so much better and I'm in a good mood. So I'm excited to talk. I'm excited about our top topic today. Did you cut out apples or inquiring minds? Wow. Are you still on the apples? Did you were you able to figure out if that was your issue or did the problem just resolve yourself? It actually, okay. So what? Taylor Farms, Cosmic Crisps. So I did cut out apples for a couple of days.

2:04And just was like, I'm just not feeling well. And it is what it is. And finally, by the time I got to Friday night of last week, I was hungry. And I'm like, this is a good sign because I had not been hungry at all. I mean, just was like, forget it. And so by hooker by crook, it's our pizza night. And I was like, I am having an effing piece of pizza if it's the last thing I do. And so I had a slice and it's from a new place that we had never tried before in here in San Antonio. And it arrived in a big old box and it was like the floppy East Coast pizza where you get to them. And I had to do the folds. I'm doing it with my fingers as I speak. And it was so good. And I think it cured me because I woke up the next day. The magical pizza cure. I'm about born with this. I don't know why medicine can't be more fun like that. Right?

3:04I mean, I woke up the next day and was like, I actually, I'm feeling okay. I was cautiously optimistic because I'm also an adult. But, you know, so Saturday was kind of a low key day. But by Sunday, I felt a world of difference. So it was definitely a bug versus a food poisoning because it really stayed with me for a few days. But I'll tell you what, like I didn't realize just how uncomfortable I was because when I woke up on Sunday, I was like, so then I did what any idiot does. And I went and had brunch. Well, if you were feeling better, that seems right. Right. A reasonable thing to do. Right. And also went to this really cute place again, trying new places in San Antonio. And it was called blush, I think. Shout out. Great. Very bread forward.

4:04And so like we have this delicious starter that was like a pesto made with stasio. And it had anchovies on it on this delicious bread. That was delicious. I had a peanut colada. Have you ever had a non frozen peanut colada? Well, first of all, home I asking. Second of all. You know, I've had a couple of little peanut coladas in my life. But I don't recall if they were frozen or not. Okay. Well, this one was not. And I was a little skeptical at first because it's like, oh, it's like milky. It was delicious. And then the breakfast that I had, it was so good. It was an omelette, um, divorceeado. I think that's what it was called. So like the Mexican classic, like divorced eggs where you have the eggs. The four stakes. Yes, yes, yes. I've never heard of this. Yes. And on one side, there's eggs. Could have got some counseling.

5:04I, you know, everything would have come together so nicely. On one side, there's the green salsa on the other side. There's the red salsa and the poor eggs are stuck in the middle. And the relationship was scrambled. Like, empty dump, it could not be put back. That's right. That's right. So it was delicious. However, about four bites in after having had that starter and the peanut collada, I was like, put a fork at me. I'm done. And I just thought, hmm. If I'm having that, like, I'm full feeling after having really not eaten for five days, I thought, okay, I'm going to tap out. So here's a little PSA for you folks. If you have a stomach bug, maybe, maybe postpone the brunch that you're going to, because you're not going to fully enjoy it, because your stomach is shrunk, and you're still a little, yeah.

6:06The spirit is willing, but the body was weak. Yeah, if I could get that stomach shrunk thing without the bug, that would be fantastic. Right? Yeah. Yeah, that's a thing for sure. But yeah, it was the great, it's been a great week. I went shopping. I have a legitimate question for you. Sure. So I went shopping this week. I had to do some. I also did some shopping this week. You did. I groceries. No. No. But go ahead. No, no, no. Here's a little bit more fun. I was so busy. I was very busy, and I was very busy. I had to go out to the beach. So while I was sick and had nothing to do, except order from Amazon, yes, I'm going to hell, and you know what? But I'm going to look cute. I had a whole bunch of things that I had to return. And then I had some things from Nordstrom Rack.

7:08I had to return, so I had a whole bunch of returns. So I was like, well, since I'm in the neighborhood, not even a little bit, that I have really never shopped at. And I went in there and I was just pulling stuff. I don't even know what this is for. Had a lot of fun. And didn't end up getting a ton of things. I showed some restraint, thank you very much. And yet a hundred percent got a handbag. So this is where my question comes into play. I was in to play. All right. Because I did. Because nobody knows more about handbags than me. So, no, no, no, trust me on this. So this past week, there's two things that I bought that are kind of like the classic female trope. One, I bought a new cover for a throw pillow because I was like, you know what? These throw pillows are boring. I need to like make this look good. And then a handbag, because you know what?

8:09When things don't fit, what fits? A handbag. So my question is, what is the guy trope? What's the guy equivalent to throw pillows and handbags for guys? Uh, boy, I have no idea. I mean, on one level, obviously the wallet would be... Well, let's pretend. A tablet of a handbag. Okay, so... But I mean, the thing that like, if you're feeling like, you know, I think women buy handbags and shoes when they're like, I'm in between seasons or I wanna get a little like immediate gratification, but I'm not feeling great about myself and shoes and a handbag will always fit kind of thing. And then the throw pillows is the equivalent of like, let me freshen up the whole place, but I can't afford to do an extreme makeover, but a throw pillow.

9:09So I guess it's like, what makes, what's the personal style equivalent for guys? And then what's the nesting in the house thing? Or is there just no equivalent? Is there no like guys just don't feel it? Yeah, I guess it depends on the guy. Yeah. It really depends on the guy, because I think there are some dudes out there that would be like, yeah, I'll just get, I've got a new t-shirt. And maybe I'll get a new action figure to go on my shelf. But there's different kinds of guys. Liddo's Lego sets. You know, so maybe for me, it's a new light jacket and a guitar pedal, a fixed pedal. Okay, I can see it being a game. I don't think there's a standard. Yeah, possibly a video game if you're a gamer. Yeah, yeah, there's different kinds of guys. I don't think there's a universal thing. You know, it could be like a power tool for certain guys

10:11or it could be, you know, sneakers for another guy. Okay, I hear what you're saying. And I'm gonna say that women are possibly the most complex creatures ever. Oh, believe me, I know. Right. So how is it then that for a, and I feel okay and listeners will, because you always respond to us in droves anyway, I am sure that I will hear from all of you to let me know if I'm right or wrong about this. But I feel like it's kind of a universal truth that a lot of women have this thing like a new pair of shoes or handbag and something like a throw pillow or a candle. It's like a universal cure for what's ailing. So what you're saying is ladies be shopping. Well, okay, that's not what boils down to.

11:14That's a stasucco, not an Eric quote. Just for you folks out there. No, I just, there's gotta be, I don't know, this may have to go out to like, it may have to send this out to a broader audience. I mean, our listeners, it's a pretty wide audience. I just, I'm like, why does this feel like a universal truth that this is something that women like and yet there's not the same. And you're right, guys, it depends on the kind of guy you are if you're in sports or if you're into games or music or fashion, whatever. Some guys are in the throw pillows and handbags too. Which honestly, I'm like, and the first time, like I said, different types of guys. But there's different types of women. So yes. But apparently you've agreed on these, on these two things. Whereas leading one to believe

12:17that it is women that could possibly bring about world peace because that can argue with that. As different, right? As different as we all are, we can generally agree. Yeah. That if the world just had a few throw pillows, it would be cosier. And a handbag. Handbags it, hit putting on the head with. Hey, don't you be a meat man. If it's mother stepped in. I mean, I'm just saying, like we put our differences aside in recognition that there are just some things that universally will make us feel better. Ladies be shopping for peace, I guess. Is the left side? Yeah. You know what? Let's have like a month about this. I think we stumbled into some merch. It's ladies be shopping for peace month.

13:17That's right. Okay. Very good. I mean, it sounds like a pretty decent week. Week. I'm going to need a month. No, since I last talked to you. Oh, oh, yes, it's been a great week. It kind of has like I've just, I redid my, I redid my patio because I think I mentioned Pete was having little envy about the other people's planters on their balcony. And so yeah, he was having planter envy. See, Pete's a different kind of guy. I mean, I got to tell you, it was a curveball. I was like, really? You cared? He was like, we can't let the people right below us look better. So anyway, I, I rejid that. And then I was able to gift somebody our old planter. So that always makes me happy when I can share the love with people.

14:18And yeah, it was a good week. How was your week? Pretty decent, pretty mellow. Dindit managed to get out for that second kayak trip. Or third, third kayak trip. Yeah. Just giving my bomb a chance to regain its feeling. Your numb bum. That's right. But I did manage to go for a little bike ride, which was the first of the year, which was nice because you have the nice cushion for the bike. Yeah, more cushion for the push. Um, on the bike. My brother used to say something about that. But it's crazy. It's like, you know, I've been riding a bike since I was like three years old or whatever. So it's jarring to me now when I get on the bicycle for the first time in a year. And it feels like so hard to, to not to stay up. You know, thankfully, you know, I got past that, you know, first year of riding a two wheeler.

15:22But to, you know, to actually pedal feels like it takes so much more effort than it used to, which is like, what? Why is it like my e-bike? Yeah. Because I just go, yeah, yeah. You buy some fun. But, um, but yeah, I mean, if you want to get some exercise out of it, you know, riding the regular non motorized bike makes sense, especially if you're zipping out of, uh, in and out of food festivals like I was. Um, that's fine. So, so, you know, it just, uh, but yeah, it's just like, why is this so difficult? Um, but yeah, what, once I do it once, then like the next time I do it, it feels normal. It's just weird. It's like riding a bike. It's like riding a bike. You know, that's doing it again. Yeah. Uh, to me, that is akin to roller skating or ice skating.

16:24It's amazing how when you're a kid, you know, even if you hadn't been before, you put them on and, you know, once you sort of get the hang of it, you go, put on either of those things as an adult and suddenly your ankles, you're like, I can't, I have no ankle strength. Maybe I'm afraid of falling on the ground. I don't know what my deal is, but I'm suddenly like, what are you expecting me to use my ankles and hold myself up? Yeah. Ice skating for me, it's like there's usually like a five year or more gap in between every time I go ice skating. So I really takes me a little bit to acclimate myself back to, oh, yeah, I know how to do this. But it is. Then you're doing your triple cell couch. Yeah, it is like a struggle kind of thing for a little bit. And I just, I don't expect that with a bike, I guess, but, uh, yeah, no, I'm with you. Yeah, it just feels like, it's like, why should not be hard?

17:27What I first get on, it's not about the staying up. It's about the starting, like trying to get like, okay, you know, let me, let me get my feet on the pedals and let me get going. And I do feel like I'm sort of like, and then I, once I get going, I'm completely fine. But that first like getting going thing. Yeah, yeah. Uh, so managed to get in a wee bit of exercise, which is good. Um, but then like the main thing is been like planning for this show coming up. And then potentially we have another one in October. And hey, um, tell everybody when the next show is first. So we're playing Saturday, the 19th at the Valley, uh, in Tacoma, uh, with the honey bee breakfast and the lameau sexuals. Uh, I'm so should be a fun show. Come check it out if you're in the area.

18:27All right. And then we're, um, potentially doing a, like a covers show in October. So we're, we're still working out like what covers we could do if we could actually play covers. Now we, we typically do one cover in our set right now. And we've done covers in the past, but it's not something that I consider our strong point. So this would be kind of a, kind of a challenge, um, for us. Uh, and so we're, we're working on these covers. And it's like, oh, every time I try and play somebody else's song, like other musicians are just like, it's so, you know, they just hear it go, oh, yeah, you just go do, do, do, do. And for me, it's like such a struggle that I just feel like I've never picked up a guitar before in my life. You know, it's like, how does this thing work? It's like the bike, like getting on the bike for the first time in a year. It's like, why is this such a struggle? My fingers don't go that way.

19:28And so yeah, it is, it is a challenge that, uh, I am, uh, you know, at least I've, I'm enjoying the process of getting there. But we'll see if I can, if we can get this one song perfected, then I will probably say, yes, do this thing. Here's my thought because I know you're asking for it. Sure. And I know you're asking for advice on how to handle your band and, you know, that aspect of your life. So you're welcome in advance. Hear me out. Like if every person in the band picks out a cover that they like really love and they can like jam to, then doesn't that make, you know, if you have a set of songs sort of somewhat easier because there's an enthusiasm and that person knows it really well? Uh, I mean, we, I am the one who is carrying a remote. Yes, yeah. Yeah, I mean, everybody's free to suggest covers and for us, it's just about like,

20:32well, what can we actually play? And in this case, the particular show has a theme to it. So we're going with covers that fit that theme. So it may not be like necessarily everybody's like first pick. But they are ones that suit our style and suit the theme of this show. So I think that the main struggle with the band right now is that nobody seems to know how to use like a calendar. So it's like week after week of, oh, sorry guys, I totally forgot. I'm doing this thing or I totally forgot somebody's company town or I totally forgot that this is happening. And so it's like a whole lot of like last minute cancelation. So it's been like maybe two months since we've gotten together. So you don't meet anyway and just like, I mean, I know a band is supposed to be everybody

21:34together, but like you don't just powwow and it's like give the other band members FOMO. No, that that, I mean, when you're a trio, it's really like it's, you know, it's like, barely standing up, you know, like a table. You take one of those legs out and it's, it just falls over. Okay, that's true. So that's true. I mean, what's the expression? Not that you're keeping secrets, but three can keep your secret if one of them is dead. Sure. It's hard. Three. Yes. Yeah. Whatever. Yeah, like if we were a three-legged dog, we could still walk around. But if we lost one of those legs, we'll fall it over essentially. Okay. So are you going to share what the theme is? Well, or not yet. Yeah, but we'll see if we actually do it. Okay. And yeah, and what happens with it? But I'll talk about it more for sure once it's confirmed that it's happening. So angsty indie movie music.

22:36Pretty much that. Yes. Not exactly. Everybody. Not exactly that. But angsty indie movie. All the songs that will be played all this night would fit into that theme, even though that's not the theme. So. Okay. Yeah. And then the other thing I've been dealing with sounds so like more of a hassle than it is. My mother and my aunt are planning to come visit in October. So we're trying to figure out the details of that. And it's just, you know, it's interesting because they, you know, I think of them as being like on the same page with everything being completely sympathico because my aunt is not really my aunt. It's my mom's best friend for the last like 60 years or so. But my mom is like, why don't you call your aunt and work this out with her?

23:38And then like my aunt is like texting me all these things like, why do we do this? Why do we do that? And I'm just like, like, mom, you two should work out what you want to do and just let me know and I'll try and make it work. You know, instead they want every single way. You know, make a decision. Maybe. Yeah. Tell me when they're coming and maybe I can take them out to lunch. Maybe I'll be in town. Hey, that would be cool. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Your mom loves me. Your mom doesn't even know me. But if my mom can love you, then your mom can love me. Of course. Yes. Yes. I mean, you guys actually look a lot alike. Yeah, but you're both so beautiful. Yes, of course. Both gingers and glasses. With short hair now. Okay. So okay. I think her hair is mostly gray at this point. But you know, she's just spent her whole life

24:40being a ginger like you. So, um, yeah. So you do have that in common at least. We have putting up with you in common. That's absolutely. Yes. Yes. Well, let me know when she's visiting. And if I'm in town, then I could amuse her for some period of time. Yeah, that would that would be cool. Like, it's really good with mom. It's got to be early October. So I don't know if you got any plans, but yeah. I plan to be in the greater Seattle area right at the beginning of October. That could potentially work out great. Uh-huh. I'll let you know. Yeah. Anything else? No, it's like I said, it's been kind of a laid back week because we've had the, you know, we're kind of transitioning into fall now. It's like right on schedule here. Even though we're not technically in the fall yet, but we've had the like the cloudy skies now

25:40and starting to rain. Temperatures being a little cooler. I'm all for it. Enjoying it. Yeah. So far. But and I guess it's been pretty stormy in the southwest. Have you escaped, unscathed? Mostly. We had a night last week where the thunder and lightning was crazy. I can't believe I didn't send you the video. I'll send you the video. Um, the, I've never seen, I've seen sheeding rain before. Not like it's sheeding rain. But like, you know, it's coming off the building in like crazy amounts. And we're standing out on the balcony and the lightning was crazy. The rain was crazy. And at one point, both of us were like, there was a crack of lightning and we're like, we're going inside. That was crazy. And sure enough, one of the maintenance guys when I saw him a couple days ago, we're still having some issues with access points around the apartment.

26:40And he's like, yeah, I'm pretty sure the building got hit by lightning. Wow. I'm like, I think I know which lightning that was or thunder and lightning strike that was. So, you know, so far so good. I was driving yesterday coming back from Dillards. Hey, Dillards. Like do I want to be a sponsor of the show? Mattress, Dentist and Dillards. Um, sounds like a restaurant to me. For some reason. I don't know. Dillards does not scream department store to me. It just sounds like like a diner. No, it's, it's, I don't know. They're just good. Anyway, I was coming back and there was one of the signs on the highway said something like storm forming in the Gulf. If there's water, turn back. Don't drown. Smart. But I was like, where do I live? Like storm Maui.

27:42Yeah, I mean, it's just crazy that, you know, the water can, I mean, Seattle were used to all the water and there's some place for it to go and it absorbs quickly and whatever. But there's just some areas here that are just not prepared for it. So yeah, anyway, it's crazy. But we're alive. We're well. And we don't have access to some things. But like, did I need to go to the gym? Come on, not what I can buy shoes in a handbag. If I drown at the gym, that is, I have failed it life. Right. Exactly. Exactly. It's always a die doing something you love, right? Exactly. Yeah. So anyway, so that's kind of all that's going on. All right, very good. Well, we're well overdue for a break. So let's do that. And then we'll come back. We'll talk about our cultural blind spots for this week. CBS. Yes. It beats IBS.

28:43Every time. Every single time. Stay tuned. We're back with more. Don't ask me to talk right after these words. Hey, I'm Stacey Heller. I'm one of your podcast pals, along with Eric Rider from Don't Ask Me To Talk. Are you liking what you're listening to? Awesome. We would love if you would follow us on social media. We're on Facebook and Instagram as Don't Ask Me To Talk. We also are wherever you find your favorite podcasts. You can follow us, subscribe, like, rate, whatever it is that you do. You can also email us. That's asking at Don'tAskMeToTalk.com. And if you'd like, text or leave us a voicemail at 475 9992726. Basically, we'd love to hear from you. Thanks for listening. And welcome back to Don't Ask Me To Talk. I'm one of your podcast pals. I'm Eric Rider. Thanks Eric. This is me, Stacey Heller.

29:44Thanks so much for welcoming me back. Of course. I meant our listeners, but I'm glad that you're still with us, of course. Our other podcast pal here. And this is the segment of the show that we'd like to call our cultural blind spots. Where we typically are talking about movies that neither of us had seen before, or if we'd seen before it had been a long time, and we're wondering, it doesn't still hold up. But these are things that have made big impacts on the culture, that big influence on movies and TV and music and stuff in the years since they've come out. But somehow we miss the boat. Now we're hopping on that boat, finally. Yep. Sometimes there's room, rows, move over. That's right. Sometimes a hundred years late, sometimes two years late. But the point is that we're crossing these things off our list and we're all the better for it. And so we like to share that with you,

30:46our listener, and hopefully you're completing a similar project at home each week, if you like. And if you are, we'd love to hear about it. What big movies, what big blind spots have you had in your culture? And just let us know, asking at don'taskmeatatalk.com. We love hearing from you. We totally love it. And we always post on Facebook. If you're not following us on Facebook, definitely do. And make sure that you comment in that, because I kind of love it when people comment. Absolutely. We got into this, before we start talking about ours, last night at dinner, it came up, something came up, and I said, oh, I do this show. And our bartender was like, oh, what's it about? And I was explaining what we do. And I was talking about this segment, which I considered to be the anchor. And you know, this whole cultural blind spot thing.

31:48Well, he's talking about something. And he had been talking about Steven Segal movies. And how he just loves them. And how his girlfriend is like, these are the worst. And how his grandfather is like a huge fan of Steven Segal movies. I'm like, I have never seen a Steven Segal movie. And he was like, wait. And I'm like, and that right there might be the catchphrase of the cultural blind spot. Absolutely. The moment of the show, because it's that thing that when you haven't seen it, done it, eaten it, been there, whatever, people are like, what? Exactly. So yeah. Yeah. So I'm just underscoring the fact that it is so fascinating because now I'm like, do I want to see this movie? No, you don't. I don't know. I mean, terrible actor, terrible guy. I don't think it's one. I think it can remain a blind spot and will be fine. Okay. Yeah. He was saying he's terrible, but it's like, you know, he's like, it's a weird comfort because he's just horrible.

32:51So anyway, okay. So, um, hey, what did you watch? Oh, well, I was just, I was going to ask you first, but I do want to tease the fact that I watch something that you have watched recently. So we'll have to save this for when we do the third edition of OOPS, all CBS in the future at some point, if we take a week off. But one of the movies that I watched was one that you talked about on the show not that long ago, and it made me want to watch it. And so I'll talk about that in a minute, but I want to find out what you watched. And I wonder if I've seen either of any of the things that you watched. So tell me. Okay. All right. So I watched two things this week. One of them was about comfort, and I'll talk about that one in a minute. But the real one that I watched that I hadn't seen the whole thing before, I'd seen snippets of it was high fidelity with John Cusack, who...

33:53Great movie. It was a great movie. It was, um, I love John Cusack, I guess, as they're like, I don't know, he's just always that like, angsty, existential, like, you know, good-looking guy, but not the typical like, you know, romantically, necessarily, you know, smart, whatever. So I loved Groose Point Blank, and of course there's say anything, and, you know, even in, um, what's the stupid movie with the, where they hijacked the airplane, and he's like an FBI agent wearing birks or something, it's with Nicholas Cage. Listeners are totally yelling at me right now. But don't worry about it, you know what I'm talking about. So just love him, and I knew enough about the movie that I could sort of fake, like, oh yeah, I don't know, I don't know, I haven't seen it. I had never really sat down and watched it, watched it. Okay, thoughts off the top of my head.

34:57One, the soundtrack. I mean, hello. Two, Jack Black. What a little baby. Like, I didn't realize or I forgot that he was in it. And, you know, so that was really fun. By the way, you were thinking of Conair. That's what it is. Conair, thank you. I didn't make it up because I, as soon as you liked on it, that made me like on it too. So, yep, I love that movie, by the way. Steve Buschemme, stop. Anyway, the other thing that I loved is, like, I'm the person that when I was younger, I'd be like, so, if you were like an animal, what animal would you be? So, his whole thing about, like, top five albums, whether it's like for breakups, for this or for that, and the debates that they have, I loved that. And then I loved at the end when he has this growth moment, where he decides that he's going to create something, and he's putting out an album, and he calls it top five records. I'm like, okay, that's just brilliant.

35:58So, let me set the scene for folks that haven't seen this. First of all, it came out in 2000, based on a Nick Hornby book. And the IMDB summary is Rob, a record store owner and compulsive listmaker, recounts his top five breakups, including the one in progress. And John Qsack plays the role of Rob. And Jack Black is one of the guys working in his record store. Yes, and Lisa Bonet, isn't it? Yep, she's in it. Which then interestingly, of course, come on. And interestingly, there was a short-lived, I think, show that starred Lisa Bonet's daughter, Zoe Krabbins. And I think she was the record store owner in that case. So, anyway, that's all on the side. A young Catherine Zeta Jones is in it. Tim Robbins is in it. Yeah, really tailors. I can even say all of it.

36:58The whole idea of him going back, it's like a relationship midlife crisis, and he's going back, and he's trying to do an autopsy on his relationships and why they ended. And is sort of trying to figure out like, what's his fault? Why is he always alone? You know, he's not really taking ownership of things or he's not remembering them. He's romancing everything and talk about angsty. And it's just this growth through introspection. Yeah. And realizing that like, wait a minute. Okay. And ends up having this epic growth and ends up with the person that he was going through the break up with. And that being tired of romancing the idea of everyone

37:58and what's happened in the past or what could happen in the future, he's like, you know what? Like, it's exhausting. And ultimately, it's like, I am really content with you. And I was like, oh, like, that's like so weirdly romantic. And also, I don't know it. It felt after 34 years of marriage that I've been in with Pete. I'm like, it's not romantic or angsty, but it's true. Yeah. Yeah, no, I, you know, for me this movie, when it first came out, I was like, you know, well, in the book, it's set in London. So why? I don't know if I'm going to like this. They moved it to Chicago. That can't be the same feel or vibe. And so, you know, I, I could relate a little bit to this character. It's one way of saying it that I was kind of like a music obsessive kind of was.

39:03Okay. And still am. And so the critic and observer. Yeah, yeah. So there, there is more than a little bit of me in these characters in the movie, but I think that they're all maybe take it to a level that I never took it to. But there was, there was enough in there that I could see myself and kind of relate to to the point where I'm like, I don't understand why this movie is popular. Because I'm not popular. My friends aren't popular. The things that we talk about and like are not popular. How is this movie essentially encapsulating our lives popular? But it just goes to show, you know, how the John Qsack has that kind of affability that people really, you know, relate to and like, even if they're, you know, not necessarily the, you know, the same kind of personality or

40:04into the same stuff that, you know, the character that he's playing is. Right. Into. Yeah. So it has been a long time since I saw it. I believe I saw it in the theater. So definitely one I think I'm going to have to go back and check out again. I was like the fact that Dayla Soul came on in the movie. I was like, stop are you kidding me right now? Um, and just like the debates and the arguments that they had and it's clearly one of those, like there was a bookstore, when I was in high school, I lived in Princeton, New Jersey, which, you know, hello, it's like the, it's Princeton University, forgot six. And so every bookstore, the record store, all these places, the record exchange, I am 100% sure the record exchange in Princeton is probably still operating. And it is still people exactly like his character who you go in and you're like, do you have the latest grand, grand album and they're like, leave, leave. You know, and you just felt like I was so intimidated going into that store.

41:08My brother being a music person, you and I have talked about that. And my son Charlie, he could totally walk in there and be fine. My brother could go in there and he would be fine. But I was just always like, I don't know what I'm looking for. And, you know, God forbid you like anything that's, you know, top of the whatever fill in the blank charts or whatever. But you would go in and people were having these conversations about, you know, the B side's better or, you know, this album was the best. And so it was just, it was really fun. I'm so glad I finally watched the whole movie because now the little bits that I knew, they all have like the context of this. And you're right. It just shows how John Cusek, there was just something about the guy that, you know, he does have that affability. Yeah. I think you've convinced me I got to watch this movie again. I spent a while. Now, the second thing that I watched that I don't need to spend as much time on. But I did it because we talked about this last week about the

42:12way too soon demise of Dolly Parton. And so since I had just watched 9 to 5 recently, I decided I was going to watch Steel Magnolias. And, and it was easy for me to find. And it is a cry fest. Now, that doesn't mean that like, oh, only women should watch it. Although if you're somebody... Which, by the way, is the only thing I've ever heard about this movie. Is that a cry fest? Here's the thing. There's a particular scene that makes you just cry because Sally feels holds this moment as a mother who has lost her adult daughter. And it is so real. And the group of women that are her friends, one of which is Dolly Parton at Daryl Hannah, Olivia Ducakis and, what's her name? Shirley McLean.

43:14And it's just, it speaks to the power... Sally Field, Dolly Parton, Shirley McLean, Darrell Hannah, Olivia Ducakis, Julia Roberts. So stacked with huge movie star actresses of the era. And this is 1989. Yeah. And it's just, it speaks to the power of women friendships because in this really powerful penultimate moment, the highs, the lows, the laughter, the crying, you're like, yeah, it's the whole thing. So it's not the cry fest that everyone thinks it is. There's so much that's funny about it and there's so much that's honest and true about it. And funny, it's just that that particular scene at the end of it, you feel as worn out as Sally Field's character must be. Yeah, the synopsis is a young beautician newly arrived in a small Louisiana town finds work at the local salon where a small group of women share a close bond of friendship

44:21and welcome her into the fold. Now this does not seem like enough for a movie. But then again, reading the synopsis of high fidelity does not seem like enough for a movie. And yet that's a good movie. And here we are. And all I remember, steel magnolias when it came out, huge, very big, very popular movie. I mean, how could it not be with all those stars, but also like you said, people just chucked it up as a cry fest. And so I don't know. Do you think as a dude that I would enjoy this movie or exist just like the handbag and the the new pillow, something that just ladies get a grion. What do you think? I think it's a good movie.

45:21If you're a guy that's open to sort of, you know, we were kidding, but it's true. Like the complexity of women and how complicated we are. And the ups and downs of emotions and that kind of thing. I'm out. Exactly. I'm kidding. Exactly. I'm open to that stuff. Yeah. And like I just think that, you know, rewatching it, there was just stuff that rang true. Like, you know, little details like, you know, the Shelby, the Julia Roberts character is getting married and the chaos around that and how oblivious the father is and the brothers and just like the determination of her as a young mother, she's dealing with with diabetes and it's ultimately what gets her and getting pregnant, but the determination to want to be a mother. And then, you know, the complexity of Dolly Parton's character where, you know, she's got this

46:22community and like every single one of them is sort of a sketch of a woman in your life for the community that most people are in. And there's just funny, stupid stuff in it. So, yeah, I think you should see it because if nothing else, it's a stacked cast and it's Dolly Parton. So it's stacking more ways than what? Okay. Okay. Mr. Bobes. Yes, it is stacked and more. Yeah. Yeah. And there's a moment and women are also brutal. There's a moment in the movie. I can't remember the direct line where there's like a cousin or somebody is like dancing and they make a comment about how it looks like there's two pigs in a like the dress that are fighting with each other. And I was like, that made me laugh so hard and years later when I would look back on the dress

47:26that I wore to leave my wedding, I was like, oh my god, I look like there's two pigs that are fighting in this dress. Like it, it is stuck with me. Wow. Yep. It has stuck with me. So yeah, watch it and honestly and watch it for that one scene and I, I challenge you to not be moved. Maybe you're not going to cry buckets, but I challenge you to not be moved. All right, well, it's definitely a blind spot for me. So it'll be on the list. I'm not sure when I'll get to it, but eventually. Okay, I look forward to it. Just keep the show going. Keep the show going long enough and I'll get there. Okay, sooner than later, Mr. Well, um, speak of the comfort, I, you know, I also watched a Dolly Parton movie and and unfortunately inspired by her passing, but it was one that I wanted to watch again because you had talked about it on the show not that long ago.

48:30And I had mentioned at the time that I actually saw this movie in the theater when it came out. Now, 1980, I was like six years old. So a lot of this movie just went over my head. But I was amazed watching it this time. How much I actually remembered. I'm talking about nine to five. So yes, I it not a complete blind spot, but it's been like 40 plus years since I had seen it. So I really, um, and never seen it as an adult. So I would say it qualifies in that. And it is interesting because at the time, a lot of it went over my head. Now I feel like I get it. I totally get it, especially having worked in an office. Oh, yeah. But it's, you know, it's not, um, maybe not the sharpest movie, but it is fun. It is a lot of fun.

49:32And it's, well, as they say in the description, three secretaries turn the tables on their obnoxious spots. Now their obnoxious boss is played by Dabney Coleman. Of course, and it starts Jane Fonda, uh, Lily Tomlin and Dolly Parton, who I think are all great in this, um, where the movie maybe lacks a little as I don't feel like these characters are fleshed out as much as I would have liked them to see. And I, you know, these three actresses and Dabney Coleman do a great job with the material that they're given. But I would have just loved that material to be just a little bit sharper and a little less sick on me. Um, but again, it's, it's just a fun movie, you know, the, the boss is set up to be this jerk. Um, they're in this like sexist environment in the 1980s office workspace. I think their company is called like conglomerated companies or something like that, that they

50:36work for it. You never really know exactly what the company does. Um, but they did their best to keep everything universal, I think. Anybody that's worth in the office can relate to the vibe of it. It's a little bit maybe over the top in some ways. Um, but it's just, yeah, it's just pure fun. But the thing that was amazing to me in 2026 watching it is the scene where those three powerhouse huge actresses are smoking pot and then fantasizing about murdering Dabney Coleman or at least, yeah, I mean, killing him basically. Right. And it's like, oh, wow, I can't believe they got away with this in 1980. Um, and it, because he, you know, 40 plus years later, you know, smoking pot in New York was finally legalized. Right. So that was wild to me that it was like, oh, listen, truck you sent a movie by three mainstream actresses in a big Hollywood mainstream movie.

51:39Yeah. That surprised me. But it's, you know, again, it's a thing that of course was eventually going to be legalized because they're, they're at home. It's harmless, you know, and the worst that comes out of it is that they fantasized about, you know, killing a jerk of a boss, you know, you would do that without pot too. So, but that just like was like, oh, wow, I can't believe they got away with this. Back then, it was a very enjoyable, well worth a watch, streaming on Hulu and Disney Plus right now. So check it out if you haven't seen it. It's fun. And it's lean. It's like 86 minutes, maybe less. Uh-huh. Um, it's like, and honestly, no, our 49. Okay, I thought it was less than that. But yeah, it's not a lot. Time flies. And absolutely does. When you're working nine to five, are you kidding me? Well, I love her character because her character, she personifies like the, yes, she's attractive and the women that she works with are all

52:41assuming that she has something going on with him. Right. And meanwhile, she's like, absolutely not. Like, I'm smarter than that. Are you kidding? And, you know, it's, you talked about this last time, the trope about and the reputation, if you will, that Dali always had to fight against. And people dismissed her to, you know, the, the big hair, the big boobs, the rhinestones, the whole thing. Yeah. Um, and so, you know, in this movie, she really gets to, to have that where normally, you would sort of expect that to come from the Jane or the Linda or Linda, um, which you call it, um, Lily. And it's just amazing. And I love that all those years later, the show Frankie and Grace would star Jane Fonda and Lily Tomlin in it. And hard to say for me to get past was the fashions. 1980 fashions that they're all wearing, you know, no offense to Dali.

53:41Of course, we stand a queen. Um, the thing is that the way she's dressed and her look in this, you know, they set it up like, oh, she's this sex symbol. But to me, it's like, it just looks like what grandma would have wore her with these outfits that she's in. And the big like permed hair that her and Jane Fonda seemed to have in this movie. Also wearing an outfit that seems like what grandma would have wore. And when she's introduced like, Dabney Coleman's character is like, oh, I'm much more attractive than some of the old Crohn's that they bring in here, um, for these jobs. And yet they're dressed like, you know, old Crohn's basically. That's because that's what women had to do. Yeah, I guess so. I guess so. I mean, the reality is if you wanted to be taken even somewhat seriously, you had to dress a certain way. It's ridiculous. And, you know, and even still men have imaginations.

54:45But, um, you know, the stuff that they end up instituting in the office once, you know, they've got basically their boss tied up at home for a month while they're waiting for incriminating material to arrive so that they can get out of the fact that they accidentally tried to kill them. Kind of a convoluted plot, but basically they keep him tied up at home at his house for a month, essentially. So they institute these, you know, changes like flexible work hours, you know, daycare. All this stuff that we're still fighting for as workers to this day. So I think it's, I think it's a great watch for anybody to think about like, oh, how far we've come, but how far we still have to go and how it sets up in the movie like a happy worker actually

55:46is more productive. Surprise, surprise. It's too many when, yeah, exactly. So, yeah, well worth a watch and not just for the historical context, but there's actually a great laugh out loud stuff in the movie. 100% and if nothing else, it's like going to the museum of old office supplies. Yes. And who doesn't want to see a Rolex? Like the giant Xerox machine that goes crazy. Right. Uh-huh. Totally. Yep. I used to know how to work one of those. Yeah. I mean, Jane Fonda set up as being like kind of dizzy in that scene where like the Xerox machine like goes nuts and starts shooting out all the papers. But is it me or was that like not Lily Tomlin's character's fault? Like she shows her like two seconds and then says, okay, bye. With this complex machine that she's never seen because she's never had to hold a job before.

56:50And then of course the Xerox machine goes nuts. I mean, I think that's kind of Lily Tomlin's character's fault there. Totally and unfortunately, I've got to trade your people. I can see when you feel threatened and you're annoyed. Absolutely. All right. So on a completely different note and completely different vibe, but from only two years earlier, I watched a horror classic that I'd never seen. Halloween. I've never seen it either. And for folks that don't know Halloween is a legendary horror movie from 1978 directed by and co-written by John Carpenter. And it stars Donald Pleasant's Jamie Lee Curtis. And it's like the birth of what they called the Slasher movie. So I've always avoided this because when it came out, of course, I was just a little kid.

57:54And so this is not going to be something that I could watch as a kid. You know, mom was never going to go, yeah, let's go watch Michael Myers. I'm amazed that we saw nine to five. But she wouldn't want to take me to Halloween. Well, that's because she wanted to see that. Oh, yeah. So exactly. Of course. Yeah. And and so, but I gotta say it's I can't overstate how much the movie, the Halloween series and like it's twin rip off series Friday the 13th, like kind of loomed large over my childhood. The idea of the Mike Myers or Michael Myers character, not to be confused with Mike Myers, Wayne or Austin Powers, a whole different guy, but the character is named Michael Myers.

58:55And Jason from Friday the 13th, like that stuff just like loomed large through my childhood, like kids just talking about this stuff. Like as if all the other like six-year-old saw this movie in the theater. Right? Because I'm with you. Yes. Because I was a little bit older. And like everybody was seeing it because they were just a little bit older. And I was like, this sounds hideous to me. Yeah. And it's amazing. Basically, it was the first one of these kind of movies where it's just like killer basically on the loose that's just taken out teenagers. Who run directly in the path of danger. Yeah. Now in this movie, they don't necessarily do that. He kind of finds them. But a lot of the tropes from what came later started in this movie or evolved from this movie.

59:57So I had always been reluctant to watch it because again, you know, it just didn't seem like my thing. But as part of this exercise, I'm trying to expand those boundaries. And I always been a little bit curious about this, especially since I kind of enjoyed some of John Carpenter's later movies. And I thought like, oh, what? He's the guy that did this horror movie. And yet his other movies are kind of like weird and campy sometimes and like out there stuff. Not necessarily not like scary really. So I'm like, okay, I'm going to give this a try. I talk about a lean movie. This movie is like 90 minutes and it is super lean. It is like, you know, they show like little Michael Myers as a kid. He kills his sister basically after she's gotten it on. For some reason, he's got a problem with, you know, I don't know.

1:00:58We have no idea why he decides to kill his sister. But she's just like, Michael. And he's like, we wait, you know, doing the psycho kind of thing. And then so I like this retelling. Yes. Well, I mean, that's essentially what happens. He's like a six years old. And he's in his like Halloween outfit. And then they, you know, they cut to like 78, you know, like 15 years later. He's in a mental institution and he escapes, you know. So the whole movie is essentially his, his doctor, Donald Plezans, like trying to track him down. And he basically figures out, well, he's going back to his, the only homies ever known. Is this little town in Haddonfield, Illinois. So the description on IMDB 15 years after murdering his sister on Halloween night, 1963, Michael Myers escapes from a mental hospital and returns to a small town

1:02:01of Haddonfield, Illinois to kill again. So this, so basically then he, yeah, he does kill again. He kills some teenagers. And it's just, it's like the, the sherf in this town is, it seems entirely incompetent because they're like, he's at, oh, I got to investigate this robbery at the hardware store. You know, somebody broke in and stole a rope, some, some knives and a mat, some Halloween mask. And it's like, I probably some kids. And it's like, wait a second, this is like the serial killer kit. How does this make it look like this going to be some kids? That's funny. Um, so you know what? I, I did enjoy this movie at especially with the time in between 1978 and now just like

1:03:03the eerie kind of vibe of this whole movie is just so well done. But it is like striking like how like it is low budget. It's like, this was an independent movie. And so they, it's set on Halloween, but there's like three jackalanners in the movie. And that's the only Halloween, uh, Halloween decorations in this whole movie. So you really don't get much of a Halloween vibe aside from these like three jackal anners. And one, just like to drive the point home, they put like next to these teenagers on their nightstand in the bedroom where they're getting on. It's like nobody would bring their jackal entered into their bedroom. Um, it's for sexy time lighting. And like, and you can see the very limited amount of like leaves that they have,

1:04:04which they apparently they had to like spray paint leaves to give it the fall feel. Because this was shot in Los Angeles in the spring. So there's very little uses of leaves just like floating nearby. Like that they had to manually put in because again, Los Angeles spring. None of that eerie fall feeling of Illinois on Halloween. So there's a lot of that stuff that I couldn't help but notice. But despite all that, it really does have this kind of eerie, menacing kind of feel that is kind of enjoyable to watch. There's of course some kills in it, but it is not gory in the least bit. Um, yeah. And I think like even you who says like, okay, horror movies aren't my thing, especially slash movies, not my thing. If you were able to handle weapons, which you did, no problem, then this movie is,

1:05:04is like that maybe even less scary than say weapons, which was a great movie. It's yeah, it's just it didn't scare me in the least, but I there was a level of enjoyment. I got just by how like creepy it was, you know. Okay. So I might have to watch this. Yeah, I say, you know, if horror movies aren't your thing, but you do like a little something, something during spooky season. This might be the one to check out because it's it's got like this kind of great menacing vibe to it, even without it being like gory or over the top. It's so like compact and lean and simple that I think it's those things make it pretty enjoyable. Well, and wasn't this um, Jamie Lee Curtis's first movie? It absolutely was and you know, of course, this movie takes a lot from psycho, which of course starred her mother Janet Lee.

1:06:06So there's some nice kind of interesting connections there. That's kind of cool. And I think she in what 2020? Three, five, six somewhere. Wasn't there another Halloween and she was in it? Yeah, she has actually been in a few of the different sequels. Yeah, I mean, and the rebos. Well, you know, girls got to like make movies, I guess. I don't know. She's funny. She really follows like what she's in the mood to do versus worrying about anything else because then you see her in everywhere, all at once or whatever it is. And yeah, she's great in that. Everything everywhere. All at once. And she's great in this. And there's a lot of questions that you like that this movie creates and doesn't answer. But it's still fun. All right, I enjoyed it. I might have to actually watch this. Yeah, right about the time when I watch Steel Magnolias, you will watch Halloween.

1:07:11I'm guessing. Thank you, probably. We'll see. All right. Okay, I'm I'm here for it. I don't hate this. All right, well, that's fun. Now, speaking of leaves that are are fake because you don't have any, isn't that partly what we're talking about today for our top topic? Absolutely. And we've got limited time to do it. So we better take this breakable, come right back and talk about our top topic from our Wheel of Topics this week, which was a pile of leaves or pile of snow which ones more fun to play and stay tuned. We'll get into it. This is Eric Ryder. If you like alternative rock, indie, post punk, art rock or whatever you want to call it, you may like the band Battersea. Our debut album Shooting Day for Night is out now.

1:08:12And you can find it at BatterseaTheBand.bandcamp.com. Or most places you scream music, like Spotify, YouTube, etc. That's Battersea, B-A-T-T-E-R-S-E-A, TheBand.bandcamp.com. And we're back right here on Don't Ask Me To Talk. I'm one of your podcast pals. I'm Eric Ryder. Hey, I'm the other one. I'm Stacey Heller. And I'm excited for this topic, although it's going to be short because there's not much to say. And also, growing up in California, during the time when you would have played in snow or leaves, you didn't really have snow or leaves, did you? Well, that is true.

1:09:14That is true. I'm like... But I did live in Nevada in Reno and certain areas outside of both the places that I lived in California and in Nevada. Definitely got snowy. Really? Yeah, yeah. I don't really not know that. I'm thinking to myself, like, well, that's going to have dirt. You all forgot about the mountains. Yeah, I guess I did. Yeah, I forget, though, that these are regional things. That not everybody has... It's sort of this iconic thing, like, oh, kids playing in leaves and kids playing in snow. And I forget that it's not a universal truth. Yeah, it's true. It's not a universal truth. Yeah, well, sorry about that, folks. No, it's okay. I think this will get some for folks that haven't lived this. Some vicarious information about it.

1:10:14And yeah, so this topic is interesting. And of course, we pick a new topic each week with the help of the wheel of topics. And you're the one that puts these topics on the wheel. So I always like to find out the inspiration of the topic before we dive into the actual debate itself. So a lot of times these topics come from conversations that I've had or debates that I've had with friends or family or I've heard people talking about. This time, I'm going to be completely honest with you. It came from the box of topics called debatable. And I was like, oh, that's kind of fun. Like, which would be more fun. Now, in hindsight, maybe it's not that great of topic, especially when they have topics like better at makeup, a gang of mimes or insane clown posse. Well, it's perfect for this week because we went along with our other segments.

1:11:18So we can go short this week. But I have seen certainly in movies people play in in piles of leaves. And we do have piles of leaves in California and Washington. It's just not as ubiquitous where people are doing big piles and putting them in like pumpkin bags or whatever. And having those stay on their lawn for six months or whatever before they finally get about. Into the garbage or whatever the yard waste bins. We do have that. So I had some leaf exposure in my life. But I never thought about it like, we, this is a big fun thing. And with the snow, I definitely have had fun like playing in snow, making a snowman, you know, that sort of thing.

1:12:20But again, it's never been like a big thing for me. So you are really going to be the expert on this. You, you probably play a lot more in snow and leaves than me. So let's get your opinions first. And I'll see if I have anything else to add to it. Okay. So first of all, I grew up on the East Coast where we had the piles of snow, deciduous trees like you read about. So lots of raking. And this was before really, you know, remember I'm ancient. So there wasn't necessarily the snowblowers. And so we were raking the piles of leaves. And, you know, you're right. You either had a place that you could put them in like the backyard so that they would ultimately break down. Or you were putting them in brown bags or plastic bags to be taken away. And sometimes you push them to the streets. And the guy would come with the big snuff-a-luff-a-giss thing and suck them up. So that was super fun as a kid. And do you know why? Because you didn't have to clean up the leaves after you jumped in them.

1:13:23And it was soft. And it was like, I don't know. It's just super fun to jump around and make a big mess. And like, you know, you thought like you put a little bit more leaves on top. And you'd rake a little bit. But ultimately, as a kid, it was like, this is awesome. Now, as an adult, it's a pain in the butt. Now, the snow thing depends on the snow. I loved playing in the snow, but snow when it's packed. And typically, if there's a pile of snow, it's because you have been shoveling or there's been plowing. And that stuff packed down is hard. So I'm going to make the argument that playing with the pile of snow is more fun because you used to make forts and you could do stuff with it like snowman and that kind of thing. But playing in the pile of leaves is more fun. We're 100% in agreement.

1:14:23I'd rather jump at a pile of leaves than a pile of snow. I'd rather build a snowman than a leaf man. So there we go. So easy. So perfect. Next week, I've already taken the liberty of spinning the wheel. We've got Civil War reenactment. I think was there more to that? Oh, I think it's about seeing what you think about. I think it was Civil War reenactment or rent fare, which would you rather do? Oh, okay. I've done neither. So yeah, this will be interesting. Or maybe I'll do a little research. Right? So yes, so that's the topic for next week. Which would you rather do? Go to a Civil War reenactment or go to a rent fare. All right. Very different vibes. Both. Yes, 100%. 100%. Both historically based-ish. Yeah. One a little more than other costumes.

1:15:24Yes. Uh-huh. So all right. So I will look forward to talking about this. I like it. All right. That's what we're talking about next week. So be sure and join us. And thanks for listening. Have yourself a wonderful week and a wonderful Labor Day if you celebrate. Absolutely. Thanks everybody for listening. We appreciate and love you.