EP 118 | The Aftermath of The JOEL TUDOR Episode | Pinch My Salt

All right, Sterling, this, we have to talk about the Joel aftermath.

That was already food.

It's going off.

I'm never seen so much art doing in my life.

Comment's like 200, 300, 400, five minutes of anger.

One of the owners of Firework started yelling at Joel on my Instagram.

I saw them.

They're going back and forth too.

You can show them.

All right, this is the first comment.

He says, Joel, you must believe that.

What?

How's it?

You know the rules.

Aloha.

Best surfer in the world, Sterling Spencer.

And cousin Ryan presents.

Pinch my salt.

Don't care.

Don't care.

You're good.

I was trying to keep up with you.

What's going on this week, Sterling?

It's been an early week for the whole country.

Surfing.

Did you get that letter in the mail?

No.

I haven't opened it.

I guess we're able for the draft.

We're going in the draft.

You mean?

Is that what it was?

We're drafted.

They saw how much work I've been putting in the poll.

Oh, so you're going to be a seal or something?

Yeah, they're putting me in the seal division.

Maybe they need video editors in the army?

Well, they need booze.

Shut up.

A human, booze.

All right, are you out there?

The most reliable booze.

Our ship would have never made it in without you, Ryan.

So I'm a human, booze.

And you're a Navy seal.

But they're going to connect you a system where you can gain.

Right.

Out in the ocean, dude.

Waterproof Xbox.

You can still do it.

Dude, all right, I'll do it.

I mean, you can still do it.

Dude, I've been adding too many fans

that I can't keep track of them now.

Should I start livestream?

Dude, I don't livestream.

We should start with Twitch.

I would love to Twitch, dude.

I was watching T-Foo, shout out T-Foo.

That's a Savage's brother.

And I would comment it because I comment from our YouTube.

So it's a Sterling Spencer.

So always make sure to represent you well.

And someone goes, Sterling Spencer's watching T-Foo?

I was like, it's cousin Ryan.

They're like, dude, I love your podcast.

But anyways, he's a huge gamer, T-Foo's.

T-Foo's gnarly, dude.

So mean.

So what's new in your world?

Saved anybody?

I'm just in a lot of trouble.

You're in a lot of trouble.

Ever since I started that non-profit?

I've only seen three eats stuff didn't go through.

Dude.

Yeah, I started a non-profit for Latinas.

Oh.

Do you know about that?

So what do you do? Like food drives?

No, I house them.

Oh!

For the ice.

For the ice per grade.

So you are just giving back to the...

Is it only women's?

It's for Latinas.

Okay, okay.

But yeah, I've been housing Latinas ever since the ice outbreaks.

Wow.

And we've housed a lot.

Are there any standards like...

Mostly like, if they're a baddie.

If they're a baddie.

Okay, alright. So there are rules to get into your...

Yeah, you have to be a baddie.

Latina non-profit organization.

Because they can't go anywhere.

Yeah.

They're all mad at me.

Dang dude. No wonder you've been a little stressed today.

I throw like food in there.

Oh wow. These don't sound like good conditions.

I mean, I'm marking on getting conditions better.

To the non-profit.

So we're white guys, right?

We're white.

Dude, white guys know about Latinas.

Like, as a whole, as our white guy race or whatever.

Like skin or like gratitude.

You kind of made me aware of the Latina culture over the years now.

And I just didn't know about it.

So I'm just curious, someone listening.

They need to Google it and figure it out.

When the door opens, it blows your mind.

Wow.

How all Latinas are the same.

In the best way possible.

Right, feisty, visual.

Real quick, I just want to shout out.

It was a little personal win for me.

Sorry, we made 183rd ranked comedy podcasts in America.

183rd.

183rd.

And I saw that in comedy.

And all the comedy podcasts in America, we were 183.

Isn't that cool?

That's kind of annoying.

We started this in a van down by the river.

Did we be anyone cool?

Well, the thing of how rankings work is when you launch your pod, it goes.

So they're constantly shifting and fluctuating.

But we're up there with some of the big boys, dude.

But we're not getting any money, but it's still sick.

I was excited, guys.

Let's celebrate.

Have you talked to Shane lately since our episode?

Shane Dorian.

Just go straight into it.

Dude, do you think Shane Dorian's doing drugs?

Let's keep all this in.

That's going right into it.

What are you asking?

Well, you look...

How does he stay that fit?

I thought the same thing.

How is he getting buffer?

The older he gets.

I know he's getting stronger than he was when he was in his prime.

And he was pretty buff in his prime.

I know.

He's almost twice the size of his prime body.

He could beat up the old saying with the hair.

I don't think he's doing steroids now.

Not steroids.

Well, he, on his story, he was talking about that he's taking testosterone.

Wait, wait, wait.

It's like a French version.

Oh, it's a Mexican version.

So he's on the tee.

He's teed up.

Are you going to teed up if I need to?

Okay.

Well, he did at all that stem cell stuff.

Right.

And he had blasted with peptides.

All of it.

It's probably a combo.

I mean, steroids doesn't just destroy your body forever.

Shane wouldn't do that.

That's not his vibe.

He wants to feel good as long as he can.

Did you see that clip of him getting barreled out of his business?

I mean, everyone's talking about peptides.

Is it peptide for everything?

Peptide peptide, explain it.

I don't even understand it.

There's just a peptide for everything.

Oh, you want to grow your nails out?

Use this peptide.

Is it a pill?

It's a little shot.

Oh, it's a shot.

You know what, shot.

I don't know. Shane's always been like pretty low body fat.

So probably the peptides.

And if he's taking peptides and the testosterone.

Testosterone.

Testosterone.

It's probably bumping in that.

And he's always putting in the word.

I was listening to some guys like complain about.

Shane getting buff and stuff.

I'm like.

Men are complaining about other men getting in shape.

Yeah, they're like really downing it.

And I was like.

Don't we want to get better shape as we get old?

Isn't that magical?

Yeah, I think it's awesome.

It's not steroids.

Because steroids exhaust your hormones.

Basically blast your hormones to make you insane.

But when you're done, it's over.

It's like a wippy cushion all worn out.

But the peptides help the hormones respond themselves.

So it's more of a natural.

But we don't know.

Because it's not what.

It's brand new.

It's brand new.

Sorry that people are using it as the guinea pig.

Okay, okay.

Well, maybe in the comments people can tell us some.

I'm sure they're factual.

Why?

I don't see why people would be mad at Shane for getting better.

Guys, get off Shane.

I didn't get that one.

And you've been monitoring his body fat for three years.

Yeah.

I mean, Shane's always been ripped.

But he's never been this ripped.

He's mega ripped.

Getting more ripped than your 50s.

Yeah.

Something's helping.

Something's helping.

But he's for sure not doing steroids.

No, Shane's too.

There's no way.

All right, Sterling.

We have to talk about the Joel aftermath.

I was already through this.

The episode just released last week.

A week or two ago.

And there's it's going off steriles.

I've never seen so much argument.

So, it's been a good hour.

Instagram in the comments like 200, 300, 400, 500.

It's like up to a thousands and comments of anger.

Well, every...

I'm just trying to live my life.

And when I go to look my phone's like,

Dude, Joel gets the people going.

That little framed man on that couch.

With those Venetian blinds, he gets people going.

And he doesn't give a crap, dude.

He's living his past life.

Think about it all day long.

He's probably sipping a straw out of his cup right now.

I'll just go for it.

Yeah.

I'm just joking, kids.

Yeah, just joking.

Influencers out at his dojo.

It was weird.

I wasn't expecting.

I got really emotional.

Really?

For some reason.

Well, before that, let's explain it.

Basically, we posted videos about the fire wire.

He called out the industry, how it's all corrupt.

He called out everything.

We can show a quick clip.

Well, show the clip.

Show the clip.

That's where we are today with the fire wire debacle

that are basically single-handedly crushing it for garage

shapers and handshapes.

Guys, literally putting them out of business.

Some of the most high-paid athletes in the history of the sport.

Now, what happens is these garage shapers and just regular

small label stuff that have relied on search shops making

that down payment to buy the blank and pay for the cut and pay

for the shape.

Now, they're like, well, why would we buy your boards when, you know,

when we're in Rob, who on fire wire, we can get 63 fire wires every

couple of months.

And they don't sell.

They come take them back into fire sales, but they still

pay us 150 bucks for rack space.

We have this opportunity.

We can sell it at a premium and make the full markup.

Or if it doesn't sell, we just get paid money just for putting it

on our rack.

How do you beat that?

You can't.

A surfboard blank is about 100 to 125 and up.

Just the blank.

Like those boards coming from a completely unenvironment.

We regulated country where you can do whatever the fuck you want.

Well, well, less shit.

Land up US soil for like a buck 50, a buck 70 finished.

That's not.

Yeah.

And then they give them to the shops for free.

Did shops don't have to pay for them.

It's technically wall marting everybody.

But it's just strange that it's happening from.

Kelly.

I would rather set up a couple small factories.

Like I would hold one in Australia, one in Japan, one in America.

And then your distribution, you're, you're helping the economy

and surf world in each one of your zones as opposed to just being a capitalist

and bringing your shit over.

And on boats that are allowed to dump all their trash with maritime law.

You have to carry your bamboo ego trunks.

They dump all their trash and see everyone's full of shit dude.

That's the biggest problem where we're at right now is everyone is completely full of shit.

You're not building them in Asia because it's some green eco paradise.

You're doing it because you don't have to play by the rules.

You don't have to pay workman's comp.

You don't have to pay insurance.

You don't have a fire marshal coming to check on where your, your acetone

recycler is and giving you a $10,000 fine.

It's just straight up wild wild west and a lot of eco on the board.

Eco my ass and a lot of the oil.

There's a way to fix it.

How do we fix it?

We got to do this styrofoam ban like we did with straws and plastic bags at the store.

Put a ban on styrofoam cups of the sea aka soft tops.

If everybody kind of like became truly environmentally conscious.

If you're selling like $200 environmental jeans,

maybe you could quit making your surfboards at fucking China or wherever it is.

If you're really that eco friendly, eco sunscreen and all your other shit.

Maybe stop making your stuff in a country where there's no environmental regulations whatsoever.

Bring in the truth sword.

I'm not being mean, dude.

I'm just telling it.

I mean, you're just saying that it is.

Someone's got to say it.

So the owner of one of the owners of fireware started yelling at Joel on my Instagram.

I saw that.

And I'm friends with him and I'm friends with Joel.

Yeah.

And so they're going back and forth to you.

You can show them.

All right.

Let's pull up some of the notes.

All right.

This is the first comment from Chewie.

Part owner of Firewire.

Sterling's homey.

He says, Joel, you must believe that she that is coming out of your mouth.

You cash your checks from Asian manufacturing.

Call me if you want some facts about our brand.

We sell boards at premium.

If your PU boards are great, raise your prices and everyone wins.

Shaka.

Shaka.

You raise your prices and we'll raise them more.

Just keeps going, dude.

Okay.

Then Joel says, Chewie, let's meet up at Moonlight Glassing.

And I'll let you explain it to the crew working how you're helping the industry.

Honestly, it would be incredible content for surfers to watch and be very informative.

I'll pay good money to hear that conversation in person.

So then Joel writes back to Chewie now.

Now Chewie responds.

Joel, sure.

How about next week?

I grew up at that at Lyndon Surfboard Factory.

I'm very familiar how things work.

And he's an emoji guy.

So then he sent this.

Well, I did.

I messaged Chewie and Joel and Kelly.

Oh, yeah.

You put Kelly.

Because I was like, basically, he's saying Joel's line.

Right.

You're talking to S word.

So I was like, well, why doesn't Kelly and Joel debate on our podcast?

Yep.

And give your side of the story.

Yeah.

And if you feel like, you know, it's our platform that this is going down on.

So it's like, well, I want things to be fair.

So I messaged him that and he's like, oh, it's not worth my time.

Did you see that?

Yeah, I did.

So things like, yeah, it's not worth my time.

Yeah.

So this got me really emotional.

I almost cried, actually.

Did you really?

Well, you're sad for Joel.

Well, I rode for fire.

I know.

We didn't talk about that.

That was a really confusing year.

I think I rode for them for maybe, maybe all together, close to two years.

And my dad had just passed away.

And I was filming my movie Surf Madness.

I was getting mayhem's and they were working great, but mayhem didn't like me.

It was so much drop.

Like I go there.

Aaron Cormican yelled at me at lowers because I got a shot online with mayhem.

Oh, no.

So it was like this weird drama happening at mayhem.

Yeah.

And I just didn't feel invited to the club at all.

Okay, yeah.

But I was surfing so good on this board.

Dang it.

So I was still riding them.

And actually the first part of Surf Madness, I'm on a mayhem in Puerto Rico.

And I feel like I'm surfing super good.

Then my dad passed away.

And I was kind of just like picking up the pieces of my life and stuff.

And I was living in San Diego.

And so taught me and Taj became friends in Puerto.

Well, we've always been friends.

But in Puerto Rico, we did that part together.

Yeah, with the crock.

And when I saw him in California, Taj is like, dude, you should ride for fire.

Oh, okay.

I didn't know that.

Yeah.

He hooked me up with Chewy and they gave me one of Taj's boards that he hadn't ridden.

Nice.

And the board worked insane.

Really?

Yeah, we're totally insane.

And Dave, who has helped making Surf Madness, he's like, dude, you're like surfing so good on that board.

It's going to be insane.

The movie's going to be insane.

You're going to do some of your best surfing.

And that was my whole goal with Surf Madness.

I was trying to live in two worlds of like being the funniest comedian I could be and being the best surfer I could be.

And I took both super serious.

I genuinely wanted to do my best surfing because the last Billabong movie that came out when I did that big spin and stuff.

At least in the core world, it was like Sterling's like one of the gnarliest aerialists.

And I won Nationals for Air Show.

So I was like, dude, I want to bump it up.

I'm 22 years old.

Heck yeah.

I was like serious about surfing good in this movie.

Yeah.

So I just wanted you to know how serious I was.

Like the place in my head at that time, I was like getting good boards was number one priority.

Yeah, set the stage for how serious this time of life was.

So when I met Chewy and all the Firewire guys, they were so nice and inviting and like...

Hey, how's it going?

Come on in. Welcome to Firewire Surfboards.

It was like the best vibes ever.

Like so different than any other board world I've been in.

Didn't they have like big posters of you everywhere too?

Well, when I started writing for them, they like did ads on me and they blew me up.

So I was like, wow, these guys got my bag.

One thing about Firewars, they lose their pop pretty quick.

So like when you first get them, they're electric.

But if you're like a pro trying to like...

And I was still doing contests.

Like I still had the US open coming up.

So that first board, the magic disappeared.

Oh no.

It was like, what?

So it just got flexy.

It got too flexy.

Yeah, yeah.

So I was like, damn.

So I went to Chuy and told him what was going on.

And he's like, so the deal was for me writing Firewire.

Because I have a lot of questions on my where are the boards?

And they're like, Nav's going to shape your board.

So Nav is a famous shaper from Australia.

That shapes for Taj.

And they were famous for working together and kind of putting Firewire on the map and stuff.

So they're like, you're going to work with Nav and we're going to make you the most insane boards.

Like it's on.

So I was like, okay, cool.

It took me four months to get a board.

Why?

It was so weird.

Well, Nav's in Australia.

So they're like shipping a board from Australia.

But like four months.

Maybe like three weeks.

Yeah.

Maybe a month at max.

Month max.

Yeah.

You're right.

And like we only have a year to film surf meds.

Right.

So four months goodbye.

I don't have a good board.

That's so.

So then I'm back writing Mayhem secretly.

And they were like really crazy about me only writing Firewars.

And I'm.

So I'm like, okay, I'm not getting paid here.

Yeah.

I don't have any money.

You know, like, I understand you're doing ads and me and stuff.

But you're not paying me.

Like I don't really owe you anything.

Right.

Like there's no contract.

And so then Taj leaves Firewire.

Taj left.

He leaves Firewire.

No word to you.

He didn't tell me anything.

Oh, like in Firewire.

And he was one like pumping me out to get on.

And I had this big meeting with all of them.

And like, because Firewire, they marketed on like they are the future of surfboards.

And these are boards are unbreakable.

Almost like marketed themselves like this is new technology.

No one's seen.

Yeah.

No one's seen this before.

And they would have these conversations about boards.

And I was kind of like, okay, yeah, this seems like pretty legit.

Yeah, yeah.

Especially Taj.

Like he's headquartered.

So I thought I wasn't good at him.

So Taj leaves doesn't say anything.

And I mess it up messaging him.

He's not responding about anything.

So I got a chewing and I was like, dude, I got to get a good board.

I'm not getting clips.

Yeah.

And like, I went on this trip and like, I was kind of like tripping out.

And then, so I'm going to the warehouse and I'm like, who's shaping these boards?

Because Nav was supposed to be my shaper.

Yeah.

And I never, I didn't hear from Nav once.

That exists anymore.

I think he left too.

Oh, really?

So they were getting me so many boards.

I've never gotten so many boards in my whole life.

Just a little getting rid of crap.

But so the whole, the word on the street was there was hush hush.

Like, their boards come from Asia.

Thailand.

Yeah.

So I'm, what's, no one's telling me anything.

I'm learning this from like out surfing with someone.

Oh, okay.

And so I'm feeling weird.

Like, what have I signed up for?

Right.

And so I, I just go to chewy finally.

I'm like, hey, who's, who's shaping all these boards?

Because I'm at the warehouse and there's like thousands of boards.

I think you took me there once and I have a picture of you like standing in front of a wall.

It's insane.

So then there were like, oh, we just signed Tomo.

Who's a famous shaper from Australia?

Oh, okay.

So he's, he's in the warehouse, but he's never shaping.

He's skateboarding on the padlock mini pipe.

He's always a skateboarding.

Chaka.

I'm like trying to get clips.

Like, I'm dedicated to this movie.

And so they're like, oh, yeah, Tomo.

Like, so I meet up with Toma and like me and Tom are not vibing.

Really?

No chemistry.

Like he was, he gave me the vibe.

I'm not shaping your board.

And I'm like, chewy sent me here.

Like, what?

It was so weird.

So he's like, I'll let you ride one of my boards.

That he shaped like out from like a PU.

Okay.

So I rode on his boards and it worked insane.

So I was like, oh, can I just ride this?

And he's like, well, this is my personal.

But I'll shape you one.

There's like, he can't shape you one.

It's got to be one from our technology.

What does that mean?

And I'm like, where's the technology, dude?

Like, what does that mean?

The technology.

So they're like, we have, we have some coming from Thailand,

from the, the, they had a fancy names for the Thailand factory.

Oh, yeah.

They loved to name it out.

And so I was like, you know, I'm young.

And I even, I'm like, well, Tomo's here.

Who's shaping them there?

The technology.

And then they're like, well, Dan Mann shapes for us.

He made the sweet potato.

Oh, I like that.

And I was like, where's Dan?

Like, I never saw Dan Mann once.

And they're like, well, he doesn't like to leave his house.

And I'm like, so, I'm like, okay.

So these boards are coming from Thailand.

But who's shaping them in Thailand?

Because in my mind, I'm like, is Nav living in Thailand?

Is are all these shapers living in Thailand like shaping away?

That's what your brain thought.

Yeah.

And I didn't know, I didn't know about computer.

I didn't know computers could make boards yet.

Right.

Okay.

This was the early oath.

Yeah.

And the internet.

The internet was on.

Yeah.

Wasn't on this.

Totally.

So every time I go to the factory,

it's like sterling.

Oh, my God.

I've never, I've never been around such nice people in the surf industry.

Wow.

And so it was just like so confusing.

And what's funny at the factory?

There's only like three guys there.

Just waddling around.

And I was like, I was just so confused because I grew up in surfboard factories.

Yeah.

You know, Ricky Carroll, like Skip Fry, Hank Warner.

There's usually five to ten guys,

glassing and blah, blah.

You know, like it's like a full-on production.

So when I was there, there's half pipe.

It was like ping-pong tables.

Yeah.

It was like a jinsy magic world.

Yeah.

But I'm like, I was shaping here.

Show me the shaper.

I wasn't getting a board and I surfed a mayhem in the US open.

And they got mad at me.

And I was like, dude, who's shaping me boards?

Yeah.

Because I have 30 of your boards and I don't know who made these.

You want to know.

Because they're like, oh, this is the dominator.

This is this.

This is this.

This is that.

And I was, and they were all like kind of fun.

But they weren't like, they weren't at the level where I was needing to get to right now.

Okay.

Because I'm like surfing with Dane Reynolds at that time.

You know, I'm surfing with like these caliber of guys.

Yeah.

You don't need a dog.

Craig Anderson.

Yeah.

You know, like I'm on trips with these guys.

And it's like, you guys are like, it was messing with my head.

Right.

And so I'm just talking to like, I'm talking to you.

I'm like, what's the deal?

I'm like, because I can't get it out of them.

And then, um, so basically I was like, Chewie, like, I can't do this.

I don't even, like, I've never even met Dane man.

Right.

So then he had me a brand new board shape the next day.

And I was like, why didn't we do this from the beginning?

We're here.

And I was like, oh, this is, this is something we're new we're trying.

And it was like the weirdest feeling board.

It didn't feel like any of the other boards.

It had like painted rails.

And it didn't have the bamboo.

Yeah.

So I'm just like, but the board worked better.

Okay.

And I was like, oh, I can like, kind of work with this, I guess.

So I was writing that and then I, so I'm living with Ramachado.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And he's the one who like, tell Santa's not real.

He's the one who broke it to me.

He's like, he's like, like, fire Mars like, like surf tech, but like, better.

But bigger.

Bigger and better.

And, you know, as a kid, I knew surf tech is a huge no, no.

Yeah, it's a sin.

Well, I just knew they're just pop outs.

And so basically, I'm like, it hit me so hard.

And I was like, I was like, like, the energy I was giving from like magazines,

other surfers.

I was like, did you write for fire wire?

Like you're, you're right.

You can cut that out.

You can bleep it.

Basically, like, the community was pushing me out.

Weird.

And you didn't mean to.

That's what I'm saying.

I always sold out, but I didn't know I did.

Right.

I got tricked.

And you didn't even, did you ever make money from them?

A dime, though.

Oh, okay.

So you didn't fully sell out.

Well, that's, that's, so listening to the Joel talk, it started making me feel emotional

like, dude, I got used.

Because he, Joel made tons of money from surf tech.

Right.

I didn't make a dime.

Yeah, you didn't even get to get used perfectly.

Well, that's what I'm saying.

Like, if you're gonna choose to sell out, at least make your money.

Yeah.

I felt like I got some manipulated, I guess.

And so that's why I have been feeling super emotional lately.

Weird.

Because I'm getting these visions of my head, like in my 20-year-old self.

Yeah.

And, you know, my dad had just died and I felt really vulnerable.

And I was trying to navigate by myself for the first time in the surf industry.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So I felt, I felt used.

And so like reading, you know, chewy message Joel saying he's lying, it's, it's kind

of hard for me to believe.

Well, it's more so like, well, let's, let's just have a fair talk about it.

Right.

You know, like, because if Joel is lying, like then, you know, that should be known.

Yeah.

Like, if you're gonna throw out stuff, it should be true.

Right.

But what does Joel got to do?

Well, well, listening to the club, I was like, well, like, he's not wrong about them

while learning the industry.

Right.

I mean, that's not a lie.

Dude, the amount of small-time surf people that are commenting on it are like, yeah, this

took me out of business.

So my business is struggling.

The only thing he could be lying about is the conditions in Thailand.

Right.

You know, and it's like, or maybe making them worse sound worse than they actually are.

But so it's like, if it isn't that bad, why wouldn't you want?

Because they're calling Joel a conspiracy, they're calling them crazy.

Yeah.

I feel like that's a classic rich person thing to do.

It's a conspiracy.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Like, he's crazy.

There's no island.

Exactly.

Like, there's no island.

Yeah.

There's no island over here.

He's crazy.

Yeah.

Kanye.

Lock him up.

I do want to say, none of us are one of harm ourselves.

I don't think any of us are suicidal.

So, to finish this story, I left, I went to serve for Christensen, who, which is a whole

another story.

So I went to Christensen, and he's shaped me like eight boards, like the next day, and

they worked good, and he shaped me like a fish and like an ocean racer, many simons.

And when I started writing for him, and I would go to Moonlight Glassing, where Joel

was talking about, it was like, there's, there's like 50 plus people working on it.

50?

Yes.

Whoa.

It's a huge glassing moonlight.

So I walk in there and I, and the smells, I'm like, oh, acetone.

Yeah.

It brought you back.

I'm like, oh, this is it.

This is real, this is a real surfboard place.

Yeah.

Brought it all back.

There's the shaper.

There's the glasses.

There's the sand.

Like, there's the porn.

There's the porn in the bathroom.

So yeah, it was like, and I felt like people brought me back into their lives, like,

yeah.

Because people were treating me like I sold out, and I was like, I was so confused.

Yeah.

I mean, you didn't even have a nice house on the clip somewhere.

That's what I'm saying.

Like, if I would have had a sick-ass house on the clip with a nice outdoor shower,

dude.

But what's funny when I left fire there, they were like so bummed at me.

And I was like, you guys didn't pay me a dime.

Yeah.

What are you mad about?

Because at the end, they were finally like, dude, we're going to make you your own model.

And Dan Mann shaped me a model that I never met him.

I never saw him.

And it didn't work.

And they're like, we're going to give you 20 bucks a board.

And I was hearing like numbers down around, like good numbers.

Well, they're making like $600 per board.

Oh, so they were, yeah, low-balling you.

20 bucks.

I'm like, what?

So I just, what was that moment like?

You just decided to walk away.

Well, they were, the hard thing was they were so good to me personally.

Right.

But they were gaslighting me.

They were, I felt they're looking back.

I feel like they tricked me.

Yeah.

I'm manipulated.

Because why wouldn't they celebrate me?

I'm surfing for them for free.

I'm one of the most famous surfers at the world at the moment.

Right.

You're getting a ton of recognition because I'm one of the only guys doing online footage.

So they, they also got to take clips from my stuff and put it on their website.

Yeah.

You were like a free.

No wonder they loved me that we lost their money.

I was giving them hundreds of thousands of dollars for free.

He's an idiot.

So yeah.

When I left for Christmas, they were like, oh, you're going hipster, you think?

Oh, gosh.

That was like, I just want to ride a board.

I want to smell some resin.

So that was my experience with Firewire.

And I guess that's why I felt so emotional when I saw them up.

I haven't talked to it too in a while.

And yeah, dude, I just like, it flooded me with all these memories because I felt so

confused at that time like, I feel like I'm doing something wrong, but I can't figure

it out totally.

So it's now that you're older, you can look back and see it clearer, especially talking

to Joel about everything like, yeah, what?

Like, you know, listening to him talk about surf tech and he made that decision like he

knew and like, Firewire, and I was like, I didn't know, I know, dude.

And also another thing where they're making more money off me, like, I open the door for

our surf shops for, so then they're making ton of money from my surf shops, I wasn't,

I'm not getting money from the surf shop.

My mom and uncle are right because they hope you were the connection to get Firewire's

and to interlite.

And a ton of Firewire's.

I've seen them.

We sold a ton.

Yeah.

So they're making money.

My mom and uncle are making money and I'm like, I'm the one surfing.

Yeah.

I'm like, when do, when do I make money?

So you got screwed.

Joel got money from surf tech.

I sold out without knowing.

I remember I was at Pete Terrace's house who was a editor of surfing and had this crazy

photo doing this air in Mexico, but I was on a Firewire.

He's like, he told me this later, he's like, honestly, we were going to give you the

cover, but you're on a Firewire.

How have you never told me that?

Dude, I remember just feeling like, can I Photoshop it?

Well, what's crazy?

Everyone, when Firewire first tried, everyone caught on quick.

Okay.

Yeah.

Like, within a year, like when I fully figured it out, Firewire went, Taj left and they

went through like a downward spiral where everyone was like, no, we're not, we're not

feeling this.

Like we want like real shapers.

Right.

But then Rob signed on, Kelly signed on, and then they did this re-amp.

So they stopped saying they were the future for the past.

No, they stopped, they stopped promoting the boards like, yeah, indestructible.

Yeah.

So they rebranded it.

With Kelly bought it, I guess, I think, I just knew that from Joel, talking to Joel.

Or he's up, I think Kelly might be like a part owner, I don't get it, yeah, who cares.

So and it was so crazy, because one of the biggest decisions of leaving Firewire was Rob,

and then he started writing Firewire, because Rob was going to join Christensen with me.

Really?

Yeah.

We were going to start a dynasty.

So I was like, oh, sick, like this is, this is best case scenario.

But then Kelly had Rob over for dinner.

I think, I, well, you heard the prices Joel was throwing out, like Rob could maybe make

50 bucks from like a, an actual shaper.

Yeah.

I mean, he's probably making $200 a board.

Yeah.

And how do you, they threw so much money on him.

I think he is just like, yeah, and he has a kid and a lot of morals.

It is such a weird balance, because if you set down a dinner with Rob and explain it,

you'd be like, dude, I get it.

It gives you a future of money and...

Well, what's funny during that time when I was leaving Firewire going to Christensen, I,

Rob was shaping boards.

Right.

He had a little shaping bay in insanitas called the, it was like the garage, he called it the

garage.

So Rob was shaping boards and putting Channel Islands logos on it and Rob was shaping

me boards.

Oh, cool.

And I was living at Rob's house and I was riding a skip fry every night and I was only

riding the boards, Rob shaped me and it, dude, it brought me back to life.

It seriously saved my surfing soul because I had, because I was struggling for so long

because the boards just felt so weird and I didn't feel in touch with everything I grew

up and, you know, like it meant something to like be loyal.

It really did and that's why I think a low key hurts so much because you're a real

loyal dude.

Like once you, you've got a brand or whatever, you want to stick with them.

I mean, yeah, like, you know, I grew up with skip fry and Hank Warner my whole life,

you know, and all of a sudden, I feel like no one's fully communicating to me.

Like what you're, do you know what you're doing?

You're just thinking yourself out and it was kind of this weird.

So Rob, what's funny?

Rob brought me back.

Rob saved my surfing soul and then left me at the e-check button.

I remember I brought a firewire over to his house and he threw it in the grass.

He's like, you can't stay here.

Dude.

He's like, this does from Thailand.

You can't be here.

Wow.

So do you think, what do you think about all that like, well, what was so crazy?

Rob's like an island was screaming Rob over, because they didn't want to let him shave.

He just wanted to shave, be a shaper on Tano Islands.

And they wouldn't let him.

They wouldn't let him.

And so Rob was like, well, because I switched to Christensen, and Rob's like, well, maybe

I'll join Christensen and do, maybe I'll be a shaper at moonlight.

Right.

And you can ride for me.

But that's why it was our kind of our plan.

I was gonna ride Rob's Boards, ride Christians and Boards, and we were gonna try to start

like a mini-dynastie or whatever.

Because no one's paid me anything yet.

It's all just talk.

And I had the biggest channel at the time.

It's like what we have now.

I had been in blog form.

So like, I guess I guess if I were offered Rob money, can it refuse?

Yeah.

He gave too much.

And I remember also and he like slowly brought them into those, he was like, what is that?

And you couldn't say anything.

It was too awkward.

Well, here's what Rob sold me on.

What?

He was like, yes, they're made in Thailand.

But they're way more eco-friendly.

Well, maybe he was tricked.

I think he was.

Like, I think he's just telling me what they told him and the money's insane.

And so I was kind of like, and what he was explaining to me, I was like, okay, well, maybe, you

know, maybe isn't that, or maybe this is the future.

Yeah.

From being the future of technology for boards to now where the most eco-friendly is, that

was a part of their brand change.

Right.

So I'm like, yeah, I'm like, I can't, I can't keep track of this.

Well, you've got a mentor that you look up to when your favorite surface growing up telling

you fireworks stupid.

And then now leave.

Yeah.

I leave.

Yeah.

And now he's telling you, no, it's good.

So I was tripping, I was just like, so that's wow.

So brought all those memories out.

I think it's a combo of a lot of things just that time of my life was just hard.

It took me years to feel like I was thinking straight.

And if that was going on during all that, for sure.

Well, being a pro surfer, it's kind of like Zoolander, which part?

Well, models are brainwashed to be a certain way so they can take advantage of you.

Right.

Like, you should be in this and do this.

And models are doing so much and they don't even know what they're modeling for at times.

Yeah, they're like modeling for.

So they train you to, to almost be obedient.

And I was used to the pro surfer wheel and it's like, it's, everyone's giving you

exposure, but no one's giving you money.

Yeah, I hate that.

And it's like, exposure is going to give you money eventually.

But as I got older, when I started hitting like 25, it's like, when's the money coming?

I know.

I kind of need money.

It's not like, I don't think I would ever think of you as a grubby money guy.

If anything, I would, I want you to be more grubby.

I know it's, when I have enough, it's kind of hard for me to, I know, I'm like, no,

let's keep, let's get gravier.

What a confusing time in my life.

And this just brought up everything like here and Joel say all this stuff.

It's like, was kind of, and, and reading all the comments like, I mean, what was the percentage

of people agreeing with Joel?

Like 95%.

It was majority.

It was 100% the majority are agreeing with, but yeah.

And then it's like, like you said, people are saying he's conspiracy theorists like Joel's

an idiot, but there are way more comments agreeing with this.

Well, Joel has always been a loose cannon, but it's been on his Instagram.

And this is the first time I've heard Joel be able to just talk, just say it, you know,

and I'm like, he doesn't actually sound that crazy.

No.

That's what I was surprised with.

I was expecting like, a little bit more like off the wall.

More my brother.

Yeah.

Like, there's foam in the lemonade.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, it just sounded like common sense legit facts.

I was kind of blown away from the interview, honestly, like I was expecting wow, they're

stuff.

Wow.

But it was just straight facts.

I mean, maybe.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think the only thing he, I mean, unless he's gone over to Thailand and check their factory

right.

Yeah, true.

So to also bring up, you know, like, I'm thinking about all this, I mean, most of

our clothes.

Oh, dude.

Well, I think I had to cut it out because it didn't flow with the pod.

He said, we're all living a hypocrite.

Yeah, he's even talking about himself.

Oh, yeah, he even said, and sorry if I cut that part out, but it just was, I had to edit.

It was like, we're all hypocrites.

None of us live.

We drive cars.

We have iPhones.

We all are iPhones.

Yeah.

They're not made in China.

Dude, this because the technology is better.

Yeah, it's because it's cheap.

It's because it's cheap.

Everything, we're all hypocrites.

We all have to live that way.

I'm not a total anti-firewire person.

Oh, okay.

My experience with them, I felt like they took advantage of me.

Right.

You have a personal experience.

Yes.

It's like, we know these are from China.

We still buy them.

If I don't know, like, if marketing is tricking me to think Kelly's with a shaper in

California making these, I think that's a little misleading.

Right.

I feel like as long as people know, and they still love them, they'll still buy it.

That's what I'm saying, like, how can we, how can we say you shouldn't be doing this

firewire?

Yeah.

People are just going to keep doing it.

Just because you played the game good, and you did everything right as far as a business

side.

Yeah, from a business.

Capitalism type standard.

Right.

It has the core surfing.

That's what's interesting, like, surfers are loyal to, um, they're beginning.

And that's what, that's why I feel like there is people against, you know, boards being

made in Asia because what, we're going to, we're going to leave all the shapers that

God is here.

Right.

And then Joel, hit on that.

Just ditching everybody that guy in there.

So it's like, yeah, you can go do that.

I mean, it's, it's, that's what's also awesome about America.

It's a free country.

Do whatever we want.

So it's like, but are we really going there?

Is that, is that really the future?

Like, are we really going to be, you know, like, are we, is it really going to be Nike?

Everything?

You know, like, I think it kind of reminds me of the matrix where you see the guy that

he gets, he takes the pill, he sees reality and he wants to go back.

He wants to eat the steak, ignorance is bliss.

People will still buy fire wire with knowing that all this stuff because it's cheaper

and they want to surf better, right?

Okay.

I love my J.S.

Yeah.

And, you know, like, you know, I'm lucky enough to know the guy who owns and get free

boards from Australia, whatever.

If, if this board had to come from China, I would still write it because it works that

good.

Right.

Like, I need this.

So if people have a fire wire, where they feel that way, have a fire wire in your

quiver.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Like, as long as you know, as long as you know, as long as you weren't like me, yeah,

I felt like was tricked because I feel like majority of people don't know this, at least

the ones that are buying it.

I think at the end of the day, everyone, say everyone knows now, people are still going

to do it because it's like you just said it works for me and it helps me.

We're selfish.

I think that's the only stink about it, right?

Right.

Because they're the same price.

Really?

They're the same price as a channel island.

Okay.

I think if they were making them cheaper, it would almost be worse.

Yeah.

Because then everyone would buy them.

That's what I'm saying.

Yeah.

So they're not, they probably do that intentionally from a business sense, like keep it all in

the same so that, well, yeah, it's smart for them because they make more money.

Yeah.

And also, they look like they're just in that circle of surfboard prices.

And also, they're not taking advantage of, you know, taking their whole factory to another

country.

Right.

Wow, dude.

Well, this is deep.

This is deep, deep core Lord stuff because like, it's funny, like true surfers, we have

this conscious on us, like, like a true server can't ride us off top.

A true, like, if you've been touched by the Duke Hanamaka, like that energy, it's

really hard unless it's like a Sunday and you're being silly, right?

You're teaching your cousin how to surf.

It's really hard to cheat the surf gods once you've been touched.

Once you're like initiated into the surfing community, because the ocean is just powerful.

So it's interesting, dude, I'm telling you, why is there so much trauma when it comes

to surfboards?

We just saw the whole style of guard.

It's because of money, I think.

I think it's because there's no money in surfboards.

I think that's the biggest issue.

Surfboard shapers should be making so much more because we all depend on them.

Yeah.

We all love surfing and they're getting the short end of the stick.

The shapers should have the houses on close.

The shapers should be the richest people in all of the surf industry because without them,

there's nothing.

Not the people that made shirts sent from China, right, all the surf industries, right,

right, right, right.

They're crazy.

It is crazy, but I just think there's also another aspect to this that I'm trying to

wrap my head around, like, why is it, why do we get, we're jealous?

This is why we get like mad at Rob, or we instantly think the worst of him for going

to Firewire.

But it's like, it's because of jealousy.

It's like, he's got money.

I don't.

So it's like, I'm going to make, I'm going to make him the villain in my mind.

There's no part of that.

I think it's like this, it's like we all stand when we get to the airport, we all just

get in line as out of respect for the people in front of us, and we're just, okay.

And then some people like, I'm going to cut this line, yeah, I'm going to weasel my way

through a couple of people.

I'm just going to walk to the front because I have whatever.

And some people just take it all, and that's where, and that's where it gets tricky.

I think on the larger, if you like, pan back, being first, it might be last.

There's a, there's a certain amount of peace you lose by walking over people, or tricking

people, or not being truthful.

There's, I think you lose a little bit of peace in your life that you'll never get back.

Unless you do it the right way.

So it's more sort of like, if people want to sell out, just let it, let it be real about

it.

I mean, it's like Jerry Lopez.

Yeah.

I mean, if he's going to make millions, let's say he made five million from the Costco

deal.

Okay.

Softop Costco deal.

I don't know.

Is it worth it?

Maybe.

Maybe.

I want to know what it feels like.

I mean, he's just snowboarding.

Yeah.

He's probably like, now I don't have to work.

He's like, everything I did my whole life, it finally paid off.

Right.

Like, I built my name, surfed my brains out, was a legend.

Yeah.

And then Costco offered me five million dollars to put my logo on a piece of phone.

Yeah.

It's kind of like, would you do it?

I think what people can, I don't know.

You don't know.

I don't know if I would do it, because no one's offered me five million dollars.

You know, it's easy to be like, yeah, I wouldn't do it.

If I got five million right now and moved our whole family, our whole into a plantation,

pinched my salt headquarters, I know, and that's the thing is people don't know what

they would do.

The most people have never been in this situation.

The love of money is the root of all evil.

Well, that's what sucks.

You know, like, what's, what's making us all argue is money.

It's money.

It all, everything's money.

And it sucks.

We're not all brainstorming on making each other better.

No, we're thinking about like, I don't like that kind of stuff that's money.

Like imagine if the whole surf community was on this podcast, talking about opportunities

and ideas, rather than to make things better.

But we'd love drama.

We'd love to.

This Joel stuff is way too juicy.

I know, dude.

I know people are calling him, have him come on one time, I need Joel.

We need Joel, because he gets it going, dude.

I love people like Joel.

Like, I think it's so needed.

I keep seeing people right.

And like, his biggest people are throwing at him is vans, you know, his money's coming.

But I don't, I don't, is all vans stuff coming from China?

I don't know.

I don't know.

But Joel in the episode that didn't, he doesn't own vans, he doesn't own vans and he's

just getting paid by them.

But he also admitted that he's, we're all hyper.

He literally, when he said, we're all full of crap, he said the S word, we're all full

of it.

He's talking about himself too.

He was saying that like, we all need forgiveness.

We all need forgiveness and Joel, I don't know, he's just a fearless man.

How does he live like that every day?

If I get in a beef with a person, I'm like thinking about it for three days, dude.

I can't get over it, but he must just have the thickest skin.

I would love Kelly to come talk to Joel about it if he really thinks he's lying.

Well, I would only be fair.

It would only be fair.

And I think people are calling for that.

Like, if you're saying all this and you're disagreeing, then let's hear it.

Let's hear the facts.

I feel like them not saying anything is just proving Joel, right?

Right.

I'm not going to talk about this on the internet.

It's stupid.

It's like, this was a waste of my time.

You're the one that commented.

I will say this about Chewy because I got to meet Chewy and film with you.

And I think that footage of you doing this gnarly tail blow at seaside, I filmed.

Chewy was in the water with you.

And I think he took us to some nice fish tacos that day.

That's another thing.

No, no, no one's ever bought me food, dude.

He took us to lunch and it was because I have so much money.

I know they have money for ping pong tables, but could it just pay?

I know, but I wonder if they would have paid me if I'd still be ready for it, dude,

and keeping it secret.

You think Rob could get you on?

Well, what's funny years later, I kind of owed Rob because I'd spent so much time at his

house and stuff.

Right.

He used his air conditioning.

Well, he let me ride on his board all like, yeah.

So when he rode for fire, I made him a video.

You did?

Remember that?

His first model was called the moonbeam, which is still my favorite board.

The moonbeam.

Yeah.

I made a full video.

I rode it for two days and reviewed it.

Oh, yes.

I thought you made a video of him.

Oh my god.

Oh my god.

No, I made a video for his first board as a...

You're wearing the dreads?

Yeah.

That's a bro.

As a brother.

Yeah, that video was sick.

Yeah.

Like, you can see right now it's happening on the screen.

That was...

I think we should have Joel back on for part two down the road.

Check on.

Right now.

Dude.

See if he'll just do it.

Ask him about you.

We're calling Joel.

He's probably on the mats.

Joel, leave a message.

I will not call you back unless it's an emergency.

Text me.

Please.

That's smart.

Don't leave a message.

All right.

Well, maybe he'll call back unless it's an emergency.

Wow.

Well, guys, we'll get Joel back on and we'll get to the bottom of this Thailand thing.

All right.

I wanted to play a game with you.

You want to play a game?

To lighten it up.

Yes.

I feel good.

I got it out.

All right.

So, I don't know anything about stars or anything.

We just want to let the church know.

Ryan is not associated with the Zodiac.

What is it?

Zodiac calendar?

Yeah.

All right, guys.

So, Sterling and me are playing a game called Name That Zodiac Month.

What is it?

Name your sign.

Zodiac sign.

All right.

Pro-surfer.

Name your sign.

So, let me explain this game.

Okay.

That you made for me.

Okay.

What?

One of my favorite things in life is guessing people's sign.

Okay.

And you have the idea.

I have the idea of what if you threw out Pro-survers and see if I could guess their sign.

Right.

Let's go.

What if you suck at it?

Let me just roll.

Cut it out.

And for the salty pinchers.

Yeah.

I swear I didn't go.

I wanted to look them all up and get them right.

And maybe like convert you.

Yeah, yeah.

But I was like, no, I want to see you.

All right.

Here we go.

So, I'm not fire wearing you.

Well, I'm just going to start from the top.

I have a list of 20 men.

20?

20?

I'll cut some out.

Marco Calupo.

Oki.

Spending so much time with him.

And I feel this energy with him like we're the same.

He's got to be a Gemini.

You're right.

He's a Gemini.

He's a Gemini.

June 6, 1966.

I'm always scared with world champs to say they're Gemini because it's almost impossible to be a world champ being a Gemini.

So, that was a tricky one.

Because I feel like world champs are usually like a Capricorn or something like kind of gnarly like that.

Okay.

I'm going to show him you might tell you that galore.

All right.

Next one is Joel Tudor.

Dude, he's for sure a Gemini.

You're right.

The Gemini.

June 11, 1976.

Dude, that one's easy.

Yeah, what Gemini's are twins or something, right?

So, Gemini's we are the most.

We can be anything.

Like, we're, we're, I mean, you see me.

Yeah, I see.

We're like, we can be comedians.

We can do this.

Yeah.

Gemini's are usually good at like more than one thing.

Okay.

That's why Joel Tudor, he's a world champ long word and a world champ.

That's a classic Gemini thing.

You're right.

And what is Joel, what is called Aki, get it?

Two things.

Dancing.

Dancing.

All right, let's move on.

This is just the list, the way it happened.

Kelly Slater.

I wanted to look in love so bad.

It's okay if you're wrong.

So, so I'm leaning towards Capricorn, but he's such a drama queen.

It makes, it makes me think he's an airsign.

So, I've always wondered if, there's no way he could be a Gemini though.

What an airsign is Gemini Aquarius and Libra and the way Kelly's such a drama queen,

but he's won so many world titles.

It's like, how could an airsign do that?

I'm going to say Aquarius.

Sterling, you had to have known.

He's an Aquarius.

I know.

February 11th, 1972.

Is he really?

Yeah.

Aquarius.

I know.

I'm telling you Aquarius, they, it's like they can't make it.

It's like, and when we're watching stab in the dark, it's like, oh, he can never be here

on time.

Like, he could never make a decision.

That's dude.

Any Aquarius I've been around, it's like they can't make a decision ever.

Indecisive.

Super indecisive.

John, John Florence.

Oh, this is a good one, dude.

Laning towards Taurus because watching him sail around the world so much, like that's

such a Taurus thing, like they love nature and he's, he seems really grounded.

But a world champ, it's, Taurus, you're wrong.

He is a, John John Florence is a Libra.

Okay.

He was born on October 18th, 1992.

He's a tricky one because he doesn't give away much.

Right.

You don't really know John John.

Yeah.

What's a Libra?

Libra is an air sign and they're kind of like a sister sign to me and Libra, Libra's,

my brother's a Libra.

I know my brother's sign if you were going to know, I don't have them.

My brother's a Libra and Libra's are like, they're not, they're normally the most like

the person.

John John's very like.

Yeah, they're normal like, yeah, he's everyone loves him.

But they have like this weird like hater side and I should probably should have thought

about this longer because I feel like John John's the luckier hater.

To be a world champ, you've got to have a little hate.

Oh, for sure.

Because you got to be like screw them like three time world champ, Mick Fanning.

He gives me Gemini energies, but I keep going back to it's make it such a Capricorn.

But he's, he doesn't take himself serious, which is a total Gemini feature, so I'm going

to go Gemini.

You're right.

He's a Gemini.

Are you cheating?

I printed out this list this morning.

There's no way you know this list.

That was a trick you wanted.

Mick Fanning's a Gemini.

Tom Keran.

I'm kind of feeling Scorpio with Tom, but I'm not telling you that I don't know why

I'm feeling the way.

Think about it.

Think about it.

I'm like trying to remember his energy when he's sitting here.

I don't know why I'm feeling Scorpio, but um, let's go Scorpio.

Tom Keran is a cancer.

Yeah.

Interesting.

They're the most emotional one.

Really?

And he's so emotionless.

Well, maybe there's a lot.

Wow.

So he's hard to nail down.

My dad was a cancer.

Really?

They're kind of similar.

They were.

Like stoic and kind of spacey.

All right.

Lared Hamilton.

Oh.

Just.

Lared.

Are you kidding me?

Oh, I don't know, dude.

This is a tricky one.

Hey, he can't be a Pisces.

Is he a Pisces?

Are you saying you're guess?

I'm going to Capigorn.

He's a Pisces.

He's a Pisces?

I should have capped it.

He almost got it.

He was born March 2nd.

So what made me go for Pisces is like they can't stay still.

That's why they call him the fish.

Really?

Yeah.

And I was like, he's got Pisces vibe.

He's Pisces?

He's.

Pisces can't stay still.

They're like Andy Iron.

Leo.

For sure.

Leo, dude.

Is that your answer?

Yes.

All right.

You got it right.

Dude, he's.

Classic.

Well, I knew he's Leo, like, thinking about just like.

He's a good Leo, because some Leo, my sister's a Leo.

Right.

And everything has to be about her.

Okay.

Okay.

And he gives such Leo energy.

And Leo's love, Gemini's, and he loved me some like, well, you're right, Leo.

I don't know how you would know this one.

Duke, Kahana Moko, because you don't really know him.

Yeah.

Well, he's a legend and a pioneer, but he's sweet, caring.

I'm just as I capricorn.

He's a Virgo.

Virgo.

Virgo.

That's what you are.

I'm a Virgo.

Yeah.

I'd mean Duke Kahana Moko.

Okay.

Dane Reynolds.

I'm so glad you asked this one.

I've been studying Dane for so long, and he's such an interesting creature.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I've never seen a pro server overthink things so gnarly.

And I think that's why he had a hard time on tour, because Dane would have been world

champ if he had maybe anyone else's star sign, I feel like he's got to be a Virgo.

Like he has to be like, if I had to bet my house on this, I would bet it.

Like he has to be a Virgo.

It says he is a Virgo.

You nailed it Sterling.

He was born September 7th.

Wait, so my Virgo?

Yeah.

So mean Dane.

Well, I don't even want to say this, but you're the same way.

Really?

Just spacey.

Like it took you like 10 years to do this podcast, because you're like, maybe we should know,

we should know.

So just indecisive, but we could be heroes.

Y'all are super smart.

I love dating.

I love dating Virgo.

It's not man.

What about Jordy Smith?

Tricky.

Big donk.

Jordy.

Tricky.

He's got to get such a gem in eyes.

I feel like he's got to be an air sign of some sorts, maybe.

He's either a Aquarius or a Capricorn.

Let me think.

Let me think.

Oh God.

Oh God.

He's got the same birthday as Michael Jordan.

Well, then you know his birthday, but I can't remember Michael Jordan's birthday.

Okay.

So you don't know his birthday, because that would ruin it.

It's either a Capricorn or Aquarius.

Pick one.

He's so silly.

Aquarius.

Okay.

Yeah.

Jordy Smith was born in February 11th, and I guess Michael Jordan was born that day.

You.

All right.

Last one.

Let's do one more.

Let's do Shane Dorian.

He.

So I spent a lot of time with Shane, and he's really sensitive.

He kind of does seem that way.

Some leaning towards cancer.

I can't remember.

So that's it.

Let's hang your answer.

Shane Dorian is not a can.

He is a cancer.

Yes.

He just made my stomach dry.

All right.

So do you believe in that?

I mean, isn't it crazy?

That was impressive.

I think the reason why it has a bad rep or whatever is so many people like, oh yeah, you

would be a fair girl.

It's like, well, I'm not.

It's like, oh crap.

Like it discredits it really quickly, because I guess it's not a foolproof thing, right?

Well, I think what gives it a bad rap is when you're trying to guess your future through

it.

Is that what people do?

Yeah.

Like there's lots of zodiac witchy women.

Oh, I didn't know that.

Yeah.

It gets even creepier.

Well, they love, they're like, um, this is in this planet in retrograde.

So you're going to be feeling like, okay, okay.

Um, that's where I, I kind of draw the line a little bit where like, um, you can't

base your mood on stars, right?

You know, like, yeah, like, you got to take some ownership to yourself when I feel like

it's kind of people trying to want to just feel better about their, well, I'm herbal.

They're terrible decisions in the way.

Yeah.

You know, you know, what actually got me into this was, um, Padamahansa Yogananda.

And he was a Christian yogi and the way he would talk about Jesus and stuff really related

to me, because I grew up a Christian.

And he, he explained the zodiac sign how God is such a scientist.

He created our personalities and sync with the solar system.

Wow.

It was really like magical.

It's like, you know, wow, like, if God is so gnarly, like, yeah, he did this on purpose.

It kind of changes the way you look at it, less like, um, random or, like, focus,

pokecy or, right, I think that's why Christians go, uh, that's what like freaks Christians

out.

Yeah.

But it's actually lines up with a lot of like rad things, like, like if we got a Yancey

and Zodiac in the Bible and he started, he, Yancey loves connecting dots, uh, revelations

and we're all going to die.

Yeah, yeah.

One time Yancey came into my office at the church and dude, I found a new book of the Bible.

He somehow found what I was like in his backyard where you find it, but then something happened

and we didn't get into it.

But, uh, anyways, no, that was interesting.

That was Zodiac, guess the sign of the pro server.

That was fun.

I got a new box for the podcast.

You know what this is?

Hold on.

Holds a shock.

No, it doesn't show.

I know.

I hate any, those kind of things are below me.

I hate that kind of thing.

This is what you call.

This is a, this is called a useless box.

So you hit the switch and it just turns it off.

What?

So, so I thought anytime we said something, um, we have to figure it out together.

Then do we hit the useless button box?

I do.

That's it.

Oh, it just turns it off.

Yeah, just shut it off.

So every time we've lit it, it just turns it off.

Don't break it.

No, I won't break it.

I've had this on my desk for probably five years and I saw it today.

I was like, I'm going to bring this.

It's called the useless box.

We'll figure out what it'll do, but we should put Kelly's, it's like weinerary.

Anytime you say soft app, I'll hit it useless.

All right, guys.

Well, thanks for coming this week on the Pinch Myself box.

I'm still in the one more surprise for you.

This entire episode, Jeremy has been looking over your shoulder.

What?

Jeremy is behind you looking over you.

I printed out the cool, look at him.

We don't have a Jeremy update, Lana Del Rey update this week.

It's beautiful, man.

But I thought, look at his hair.

I've never seen it that, like, pressed good.

Who feet?

Oh, it's so poofy.

Lana's been working.

But isn't that a beautiful photo of Jeremy?

So Jeremy's on the wall now.

Yummy!

Thanks for watching.

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