Ep98 What 40 Years of Marriage Actually Teaches You About Christ | Peter & Debbie Herbeck

"The love of Christ was the magnetic force that really drew us together."
~ Debbie Herbeck

• What does it actually take to keep Christ at the center of a marriage through decades of real life?
• What do you do when one spouse is further ahead in faith than the other?
• How do you build a family culture that passes faith down to the next generation?

In episode 98 of This Whole Life, Pat and Kenna welcome Peter and Debbie Herbeck, a couple with nearly 40 years of marriage, four children, and 12 grandchildren. Their story is anything but ordinary. Debbie grew up Jewish, came to faith at the University of Michigan, and paid a real price to follow Jesus. Peter came from a Catholic family shaped by both great love and the wounds of an alcoholic home. When they met, they were both already fully committed to the Lord individually, before they ever considered committing to each other.

What followed was a marriage built not on ideal circumstances, but on a shared decision to put Jesus first, even when it was hard, messy, and costly.

In this conversation, Peter and Debbie share the practical rhythms that kept their marriage rooted through busy seasons of parenting and ministry, what they say to couples where one spouse simply isn't on the same page in faith, and how they built a culture of honor in their home that their grandchildren are now carrying forward.

This is the kind of wisdom that only comes from decades of saying yes to the Lord together.

Peter Herbeck is the Vice President and Director of Missions for Renewal Ministries. Debbie Herbeck is the founder and executive director of Be Love Revolution and Pine Hills Girls Camp, and a speaker whose journey from Judaism to the Catholic faith has inspired thousands.
Together they are co-authors of Lessons from the School of Love: Building a Christ-Centered Marriage.

Episode 98 Show Notes

Reflection Questions

Chapters:

• (01:27) - Introduction and welcome
• (07:30) - Highs & Hards: life lately
• (09:40) - How Peter and Debbie met
• (18:30) - Blending two very different backgrounds in marriage
• (26:30) - Keeping Christ at the center: practical rhythms
• (39:30) - When one spouse is trailing behind in faith
• (50:30) - The culture of honor in your home
• (58:55) - Challenge By Choice

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Interested in more faith-filled mental health resources? Check out the Martin Center for Integration

Music: "You're Not Alone" by Marie Miller. Used with permission.