FretzleMania 245: Cuffs & Collars

What is going on, Peeps? Welcome to episode 245 of the Fretzel Mania podcast. I am the Intercontinental

treasure and your second favorite Canadian, Mr. Fretz today on this unseasonably warm March

day. The day that I actually fired up the smoker for the first time in 2026 to see if it

didn't die on me during the winter. Yes, it's working. And yes, I am doing some smoked

cheesets. But because this is Canada, by the time you hear this, there will be snow returning

to the ground. It is March after all. Today, I have Monday Night Raw from March 9, 1998,

recording this on March 9, 2026. But first, folks, as you all know, as is tradition, we're

grabbing the remote control. We're going grapple surfing to see what else was going on in the

world of wrestling on this particular week. And on the very same night down in WCW.

Hydrate kids, even if it's a delicious hot cup of coffee, the big time year,

Monday night show from the Lawrence drill veterans Memorial Coliseum,

in Winston, Winston Salem, North Carolina. That was a word salad there. And I forgot

the dressing. Three hour night shows. Oh, oh boy. The cat defeated Damien 666, sick boy,

defeated Lenny Lane, Bill Goldberg defeated Holden One, Barry Darsow, aka Future Hall of Famer,

Demolition Smash. Yes, Demolition's going into Hall of Fame, and I hope Crush gets an

honorable mention, at least, because he wasn't there for about a year or so. Dean Millico defeated

Kidman, Ryan Adams Crush, speaking of whom, defeated chaos with Robbie Rage of High Voltage.

Scott Norton beat Hoover, Chris Benoit, and DDP versus Raven and Saturn ended in a no contest.

The British Bulldog defeated Conan. Conan has been in the news recently.

Apparently, he had a leg amputated, his health, he's not doing so well, so shout out to Conan.

God bless you. A company, of course, by the late great Vincent. Chris Jericho retained the

Cruiserate title against Disco Inferno. Walker T. Beat Travel Guerrero Jr., Rick Flair defeated

Kurt Henning by DQ. Lex Luger and Rick Steiner versus Scott Norton and Scott Steiner, the Scott

was a double count out. Six man tag, main event, NWO, Hogan National, defeated Savage, Sting,

and the Giants. We are approaching the NWO Civil War. And if you're a fan of Marvel Ultimate Alliance

2 on the Xbox 360, like I am, are you team pro registration or team anti registration?

Anti-reg, all day, shout out to Mike at Graphic Word.

It's like guns Saturday night on March 14th, 1998. We had Delo Brown defeating Robert Gibson of

the Rock and Roll Express. Pergon defeated Jason Arnt, aka Joey Abbs of the Mean Street Posse.

Jeff Jarrett beat Tom Brandy and in a fatal four-way tag match, we had

Scholar Nate Ball beating Los Bordeques that is Jesus Castillo and Hosey as throughout

a junior. The other half of the Los Bordeques was Savio Vega and Miguel Perez Jr and the Truth

Commission's Recon and Sniper. Yes, shotgun, it's it's taped before or after Monday Night Raw and

yeah. Speaking of things that were before Monday Night Raw, thanks to prorestingwiki.com

for this little tidbit. I'm going to be dabbling with them for some of my notes going forward

because they cover dark matches sometimes, including this week. We had Savio Vega defeating

Rockus, John Morley defeating Matt Hardy, that is of course the future Valvenus,

Flash Funk defeated Adam Copeland, Edge, and Mike Jorosi, aka Duke The Dumpster Jorosi,

defeated Paul Diamond, aka Hado of the Mean Night Express, and Max Moon,

after Conan decided he didn't want to do that gimmick. Again, God bless Conan, hope you're okay.

Monday Night Raw this week from Wheeling West Virginia smart 9th 1998,

Lousy Smarch weather. But again, not today, it's almost spring in Canada, but we will have snow

in May because Canada. We have that dangerous dojo that is Steve Muffuggan Blackman and Ken

Shamrock going up against the Nation of Dominations for Rook and Rocky Mayavia.

Before we get into this Monday Night Raw kicked off with a recap of last week's historic show and

many moments that it gave us. Unfortunately, it did not cover the return of Double J,

but we saw a recap of Mike Tyson joining D generation X and the Undertaker making his return to

confront Kane following his casket match loss and apparent demise at the Royal Rumble.

Crowden West Virginia tonight loves Blackman and Shamrock, so I imagine a very young

Kyle from the apron bump podcast would have been there. I believe he's from West Virginia.

Big Rocky sucks chance for Dwayne to kick this one off.

And we see a sign of a crowd that says Nation of Mastervation.

I used to call them the Nation of Constipation,

complete with grunting and fart noises in the beats of their. I was a very mature 13-year-old boy

in 1997. Wait, this is 1998. My birthday is in April, folks.

Same day as John Cena, if you're asking, while I do.

And then we learn that as is tradition on WWE programming, Stone Cold Steve Austin is yet to arrive.

Yes, much like your chronically late coworker who shows up just in time to save the shift.

Steve kicks for Rook and then Ken says, hey, I want to turn, and also kicks for Rook.

The rock hits a body slam and the newly named, recently named,

heples elbow on Ken. Ken hits a facebuster on for Rook.

And we learn that Stone Cold following hit learning that Mike Tyson has joined DX.

He had an altercation with a WWF official at a Buffalo airport.

Or no, he had an altercation with somebody. I don't know if it was an official being alluded to, but

see, 1998, Buffalo, was he missing with Brad May, or Rob Ray, or Dominic Hasick,

or maybe even Muroslav Satan? I can sit here and name obscure Buffalo Sabers players.

They're doing pretty good right now, by the way. At least friggin suck, I don't want to talk about

them. The rock here, on commentary, he is noted that he is building his own dynasty.

Oh, I smell what they're cooking there. Rook hits the power slam that won him the WCW title

from Vader in 1992, but it results in a two count. The show begins to glitch out, and this

happens a lot during the show. So it's either something's happening in the production truck.

Well, Bucktooth is asleep at the wheel. A 10-year-old Bray Wyatt is fiddling with things because

even as a child, Windom Rotunda could have been a menace, but he wasn't. I saw that becoming a

mortal documentary. He was a darling. Or maybe it's pain in the undertaker magic.

For me, it had Wyatt six vibes all day. Like, you know, the show glitches out, then you have

Uncle Howdy sitting in a chair, telling everyone that solosikoa, give me back my lamp, or

I'll friggin have you, or something like that, or a VCR rate of tape. That's not the worst when

the VCR eats your favorite tape. That happened to me. I wasn't very happy. We have Shamrock

as an absolute house of fire. On the rock, we get kicks, power slams, and her conrata,

and then Comma and Delo decide, sought it. I've had enough of this crap run in,

positive EQ. Even this show, oops, all the EQs, wait, that was a total title last year.

It's a total title again this year, except it's not going to be that.

During the beat down, Mark Henry assaults Steve Blackman on the outside, while everyone else

in the ring takes out Shamrock. Rock then wants Ken Shamrock, all the himself in the ring after

being beaten down, and he sends the nation a domination packing. Hey, pain, not pain.

I'm not saying, pain, and Rocky, my idea. That match happened, but not yet.

So, Ken fights back, gets a belly to belly, gets an ankle lock in.

Rock has a visual tap out, but the national domination tried to interfere, but Farouk then restrains

him saying, no, he said he didn't want our help. So, here you go. Now, F-A-F-O-Rocky,

the sentient amongst the nation, it's almost time.

Farouk doesn't allow them to help, which is given me the, you know, the eyes emoji.

At that stage, we have a camera waiting in it, darkly lit, receiving Doc, waiting for Austin to

arrive, because he had an interview, and so does Mike Tyson.

Hydrate, hydrate, coffee. The generation next interview, ah, jump and cry daddy's, these are,

this is just these two bellens coming out and talking about how cool they are, how big their

wiener is, and now everything's x-rated. Yeah, um, it wasn't. It was a very clever marketing

employed to, yet susceptible people were going through puberty at the time, like me, a fall for this

hotter shite. Ah, triple H, it's going to be x-rated. Kids, get your children's permission.

This question is advised, but completely ignored.

And we have a bit about Owen Hart last week. China interfered in Owen Hart's European title

defense spoiler alert that happens again tonight, but then he's saying that China got in that 80-litty,

bitty little head of yours, and she will again. We then roll footage of Austin getting super kick

last week on raw, complete with cheesy whiplash sound effect, not was. That was a great touch by

the way. That was funny. That was like me trying to dick around on Windows Movie Maker 98

and putting in HBK isn't here tonight, can speak you us by his absence.

But he is live via satellite from some random hockey themed bar, and I thought

West Virginia doesn't have a hockey team. He might not might not have a professional hockey team.

Ah, pile, call into the show if you know about any hockey teams in West Virginia that aren't

collegiate. They might have an AHL team, not if I think of it. But anyways, it's a random hockey

theme bar, have in a beer. Ah, have eight beers. And HBK, possibly a little buzzed, says that we

have acquired the hottest commodity in the world in Iron Mike Tyson. Then Sean begins to cut a bit

of a quiet loud promo like he said. But I think it's just bad audio mixing on their end, and he

doesn't say much, probably something like WrestleMania, Steve Austin, superkick, title, Mike Tyson's

second. We get a commercial for Jack specific toys. This is the Legends line featuring

Mertrified Jimmy Snuka, Andre the Giant, Captain Lou Albano, Super Mario, himself, and of course

the best of all, classy Freddie Blassie. Owen Hart versus Barry Wyndham for the European

Championship. Triple H is on commentary. Yeah, it's a nugget time. I'm not going to do that

every time now. Fucking Triple H, man. And then he begins to hide behind China when Owen Hart

tries to confront him as per usual. Triple H is talking smack while Barry is getting a bit of

an advantage. At Owen Hart, we see more in-dish-heck issues. Owen gets a back-soup-plex,

Barry with a wrist. Impactful, Larry Atto. Triple H says that Owen has a big nose,

hot calling cattle black. Barry then gets that walking back-soup-plex DDT. However, Owen Hart

is resilient. Triple H continuously being a twat on commentary. Owen with a big spaghingo

back body drop ding. The spinning wheel kick and the 10 punches. We see a sign on the crowd.

Sunny, six, nine. Moving on, I'm just a man. I am just a man. I'm really just a man.

Owen Hart with a missile drop kick. And on his way down from another 10 punch spot, he rolls his

ankle, which I have done. It is painful. China punches Owen right in the wiener right in front

of Tim White. This qualification, Triple H, laughing on commentary, Crick. Bradshaw comes down

to the ring and Chase's Barry Wyndham manages to get him a big boot. And this match, this feud

must continue. One day, Nate Rawl tonight is brought to you by 10-3-2-1.

WWF The Music Volume 2 and Jack's Pacific Action Figures, the legends line that I just talked

about. Yeah, 10-3-2-1. I don't think that's something we had in Canada. We had like 1-800 collect.

We had these other things where you would dial zero in the number, collect calls from a payphone.

Yes, would you accept to collect calls from him? Can he pick me up from the party by?

If he caught that, I love you. I'm not going to repeat that. Gary Lawler is backstage with Paul

Bearer in pain in an old wooden locker room. It looks like the locker room of one of those old

barns. Those old hockey arenas that are just rustic, a lot of wood everywhere, a lot of steel

everywhere, a great echo chamber, great acoustics, especially for cheering. Take me back, good times.

Rick McLeish Memorial Arena in Canyton, Ontario, Canada. Big shout out.

All Bearer does not want to talk about the undertaker. However, he turns his attention to Vader,

and how Cain bashed his brains in at no way out with that wrench. Then we see footage of

Vader unmasking and showing his wounds. I believe it was on shotgun or superstars.

He has bandaged up. He has bruised all the heck, selling a lot of sympathy for his character.

I mean, he wouldn't get sympathy later when he calls himself a, well, you know.

I mean, during this little chat, the, the benches, so the benches in this locker room

open. So they have like storage compartments underneath like for your gear. So they keep like

opening and closing and shutting and shaking and making noise. Either Owen's revving

or the undertaker's spooky powers are getting involved here.

And then they go away because they're like, Paul's like, yeah, I'm out. Nope. Yeah.

Cain's just sitting there staring at him. It's probably him doing this.

Aguila, aka S.A. Rios, aka Papi Chulo. He has a match coming up next with two sexy Brian Christopher.

Aguila is accompanied by light and heavyweight champion Takamijinoku.

Jerry basically bolts from his backstage perch to the, to get to the entrance way

to accompany his son to his Mac. He looks a little bit spooked following that locker room incident.

And then Brian says to the camera, I look good and I taste good too.

Anyway, Aguila has had a temperature of 101 degrees as of late. I mean, he's not hot blooded.

He doesn't have a fever of 103, but 101 is 38 degrees Celsius, which is one degree hotter

than the normal body temperature for a Canadian hot blooded male, which is 37 in a row.

You get a dropkick to the back by Aguila, brainboard arm, drag, corkscrew,

by him, and assying moonsault. And then we see more of the light smell functioning,

either gray white, hopped in a time machine, or the undertaker is controlling things from the dark side.

Too sexy hits a skull-crushing finale, and a staggy, really dodgy,

looking sit-down tombs dome at absolutely spite, Aguila. I look at that and thought,

what if that was the one that spiked off the summer slam? It might have been

effed him up, but it also may have been, you know, not as impactful, if you will.

We get a float over into a rude awakening by the future grandmaster. This match is all Ryan,

who then hits a sunset-flat par bomb to the outside. Aguila with a lovely,

super-armed drag. We get more more lights going out. We have a wiki-looking bow and arrow,

submission spot, Jerry and Taka fight at ringside. The 450 is denied by Jerry

jerking Aguila off top rope, and we get yet another EQ finish. Oh boy,

command Kevin Kelly with a very tongue-in-cheat remark here saying that Lawler has been caught in

a deceitful act for the first time in 25 years. Okay, Kevin, we get a post-match more scrapping

by the four men, and more light stuff happen as well. M&Ms, the candy of the millennium,

smarties are better. The moment of the night is WrestleMania 2 with Andre the Giant

winning this battle royal that had, you know, football stars like refrigerator Perry,

and much of the roster. But they're showing Andre the Giant eating Bret Hart out of the ring

to win by royal. He, I wonder why they're showing Bret Hart getting heated by Andre the Giant.

Backstage Austin arrives, he comes to the ring through the crowd, and Austin's pretty pissed off.

He said that Vince called Tyson the baddest man of the planet, and then he

replays it. He asks the truck to replay it a few times, and customally the baddest man on the

planet. And then he analyzes it. Without the use of Madden and the marker on the screen,

if you know, you know, he says run it back, not like J.U. So, but run it back again, or I'll burn

the truck up. So Kevin, nobody plays it again, and again. And he considers it Austin does a slap

in the face. If you think Vince is insulting me, give me a hell yeah, hell yeah. The SCU shirt,

not that SCU, sorry Christopher Daniels, no. He would be doing dark matches for the time as well,

Daniels is. But as they don't have a cold beer, cold beer for me, I'm not going anywhere,

until Vince comes out here, though they keep delaying it, they send out Jack Lanza, they send out

Cherry Briscoe, they send out more refs, and Pat Patterson, and Sergeant Slotter,

and Vince is showing backstage, like I'm not going out there, no, no. It's like you have to go,

Vince, like, he bet Mr. Mack Mayan, he's just going to keep delaying the show until you get out

there. So Steve is having to sit down protest, and wait and white shirt security comes down here

if Pat Patterson, no, or man, finally. Finally, Outcomes. Finally, Outcomes Vince McMahon,

who a chorus of booze, Austin wants Vince to explain why he's been decorating Mike Tyson,

as of late. Vince explains that calling Tyson the baddest man on the planet was just a figure

speech. So Austin replies with given Vince the bird right in his face and calls that figure speech

as well. Good one, I know you'll like a little bit of sound language, so here's to you.

He wants to know if Vince wants him to be the WWF champion, yes or no.

If Vince does, give Austin a hell yeah. Vince refuses to say yes or no, he doesn't do the

oh hell no, yet that's coming up. He's had enough, but now Austin wants Vince to give him the

best shot across the face. J.R. is claiming that this is ridiculous. Austin tries to get McMahon

wild enough, wild up enough to punch him by ripping at his sports jacket and calling him a yellow

bastard. The cousin of green bastard, he's unknown. When Vince never lays a finger on Austin,

Austin then asks the audience if they want him to kick Vince square on his ass.

Of course hell yeah. Vince starts to leave and Austin says that he tells Austin that he will

pay for this embarrassment. Well, he ever. That's Vince in his studio's head for the rampway. Austin

says that he'll be bidding up for play cheer tonight once he gets in the ring. When Sean Michaels

shows up again, Austin will be knocking his ass out too until he doesn't get up anymore because

that title is coming to him and that's the bottom line. Stone hold says so. Oh doggy.

Pretty sweet ear respect here since forever series 96. Okay, let's let's be real, but this is

turning it up to 12, man. This is some fantastic promo work by Master Mac Man and Stone

Steve Austin. Our next contest to accool them on the crowd is Terry Funkin cactus jack versus

the co-backers who come out to the job of entrance during the break, waving the maple leaf and

they floored the Lee, you know, the flag of the province take Quebec. ECO gives for the corner

there's a big sign on the crowd that says Nitro sucks fish off swallows.

Moving on. Triple H demands security extra security out for his match later tonight.

Foley pins PCO with the double arm DDT and we also learned that the NWA tag team title match

due to time constraints tonight because of Stone Cold's little protest is going to be on superstars

and they're not going to go and see what it is. Call the superstar line to find out

something about Jim Coronet, something about Tyson. Well, we're just going to have to wait

and see. The 10 321 slam of the week is the undertaker last week. Paul bearer brings Kane with

him down to the ring to talk about the undertaker so I guess he shifts his focus back on to the

to the dead man by making his return the undertaker has just made things hotter and hotter and

hotter long. Let's go out when they come back on undertaker is standing in the ring behind

his brother when bearer and Kane turn around long let's go out. I'm back on takeer is gone

WrestleMania take a real face Kane and return to the dark side never to return again.

Now light those corners on fire 20 days until WrestleMania and I know it's going to happen

and Kane's magic pyro goes off no more undertaker shenanigans and next week bunny night raw

is on Tuesday nights. I don't know if it's the US open. I don't it wasn't the Westminster dog show

that's already happened probably due to other things going on in the networks but next week's

Monday night raw is on St Patrick's Day 98 so be sure to wear green or you're gone get pitched.

The artist formerly known as Gold Dust versus Marvelous Mark Merrow. Luna and Sable are both cuffed

to ringside so they don't get at each other. Jerry Lawler says that his hormones are slam dancing

in his pants. He am I Jerry just no. Gold Dust comes out looking

normal looking like regular Gold Dust just with sleeves put off.

So two former partners here two men starved for attention two men who were dying for the spotlight

in Mark Merrow and Gold Dust because the spotlight hasn't taken off them and onto their managers.

They have a one-on-one match Merrow chases Gold Dust around ringside. They come by Luna who trips up

Merrow. Gold Dust drops Merrow on the guardrail brings him back inside for a jumping laryon.

He puts Merrow down on the suplex and goes to the outside to mess with Sable. Merrow brings Gold

Dust back into the ring gets whipped into the corner and we get the curtain call.

On Merrow, Refbump, Gold Dust gets the handcuff key from his pants.

Gold Dust goes right to his Johnson and unlocks Luna. She goes over and starts drawing all

over Sable's face to make her Acadias get the mascara out just googling all all over her not

that kind of Google. Sable starts to look like the missing link when the refs finally come down

here and escort Luna away. This matches in no contest by the way. There's

there's nothing. In the back Gold Dust and Luna issue a challenge to Merrow and Sable for

WrestleMania. They can have WrestleMania. The celebrities for the show include Pete Rose,

Jennifer Flowers, and Iron, Mike, Tyson. The video package airs highlighting Mike Tyson's

last six weeks with the company and how the media has been loving it.

Hydration. This sets up an interview, Jim Ross conducts with Mike Tyson.

Being in the WWF as a dream come true, he said he was a Steve Austin fan until he just

respected him in front of the world by flipping him off back on January 19th. Austin pissed him off

pretty barely that night. Ross wants to know why Tyson can be fair as a special enforcer at

WrestleMania. Doesn't Tyson think DX is just using him to get what they want? Tyson then asks

JR if he has ever used anyone to get where he is today. That's the way the world works and that's

true. And if you think otherwise, you need to get worth the program. When he is asked if he can

be fair in this officiating, Tyson tells JR that fair was winning and walks off. Oh, that's a

reverse Ted Lasso. Well, that's good. Your main event. Triple H versus Savio Vega.

This screams main event of action zone in summer of 1995.

Oh, Dougie. Refs and agents surround the ring to ensure Triple H gets some extra security

after Austin threatened him earlier in the night. Not even 30 seconds after the bell sounds. Austin

walks tall to the ring, Dunor de Brisco, Stunor de Kiyota, Stunor de Savio. Hey, wait, Sean Michaels is

here. It was a setup all along. As Austin turns around, he eats another sweet chin music.

Triple H celebrates and mounts Austin for an added insult to injury.

China hands Michaels a chair and as they sit up Austin takes a shot to the head

and we run out of TV time with DX standing tall against Austin following the chair shot from hell.

So that'll do it for this fun, folks. Thank you very much for listening. Be sure to follow me on

my social medias. That's Twitter, Instagram, and Blue Sky at Fretzel Mania, F-R-E-T-Z-L-E. Mania,

this podcast is available on wrestle addict radio. The cure for the common wrestling podcast,

also home to grace for impact Nate, the great step journey through TNA wrestling and I got to

give a big shout out to leave a base. Blue pants herself for Nate getting her some

war merch to plug into where and the model. Good shit there, pal. That's fantastic. So

can't have coped blue pants and Nate. Yes, we're getting into 2011, 2010.

Error TNA, I believe I have a couple of episodes coming up to be on and they are

oh boy, they're doozy's just just you wait and see. Also streaming, most ish, who's day nights

at 7 p.m. EST. You got the kings of the rings podcast featuring cave.

It's legend, cave, cave, fave, whatever they would like to be called, Willy T. And

a esteemed general manager, king, Ricky Rosé. And although he is currently in the hyperbolic chamber,

big love goes out to Mr. White LP, the online perspective, who in your news and reviews,

and your previews and predictions in the Stephen A Smith style that only Zachary Rezukiya knows

how to do. Big love to you, pal. Can't wait to see you when you desire to come back. But enjoy

that time in the hyperbolic chamber. Recharge and take care of your business, bro.

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So until next time, TTFN, talk to offer now, and keep your stick on the ice.