Gracefully Broken & Faithfully Restored

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Hey, it's Benji Cole, son of Al Cole from CBS Radio and host of the syndicated talk show

People of Distinction.

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Now, zip back and strap in because on the line with us today, we have the impressive

Darnie's Harrison.

And we're going to be discussing her incredible book, My Journey, My Lose Man.

It's Amazon, it's Barnes and Noble, it's a lot of other places, type it into a search

bar, zip back, and be greeted with it all.

People, what happens when modern medicine hits a wall and the only voice left to guide

you isn't from a doctor, but from God?

Okay, well, that's an interesting question and it's one that gets to the heart of the

book, right?

That's the exact moment when her son, a promising athlete, was left in a coma and faced

with an impossible choice between life and death, she didn't consult a second doctor.

She listened to a divine whisper.

This is the story of navigating a tragedy when science says one thing, but your spirit

says another, this is remarkably compelling and one, man, for any parent out there listening

and myself included, oh, my goodness, could there be a bigger fear that we have?

Watching our children grow, you always want to make sure that you protect them in every

way possible, but unfortunately, we can't, right?

There are some unexpected things that come up and we dread being in a position like this.

Get back, strap in, we're going to hear an amazing journey that may just shift the way

you look at yours.

Darnies, first and foremost, welcome to the network and thank you very much for being with

us.

How are you doing today?

I'm doing great.

Thank you for having me.

Absolutely.

Darnies, listen, it is a pleasure.

I think, like I mentioned, man, one of my biggest fears, I have two beautifully young

children and when we were doing research and preparation for today's discussion, that

was something that had my heart racing because of course, you're looking at this book, it's

hard not to put yourself in that position and reflect on that journey.

We are incredibly grateful that you have written the book and even more so that you're

here with us to discuss it.

Let's start off first and foremost before we jump into those pages, tell us a little

bit more about your background.

I was born in Cleveland, Ohio, and I was raised, my grandmother, and a family of 12, she

had 12 kids, so I was raised with my 12 aunts and uncles who I really didn't know they

were aunts and uncles for a long time.

I thought they were brothers and sisters, so it took a lot of six or seven when I really

realized they were aunts and uncles.

And then after that, I married at age of 22, but having my children had three boys and

a girl.

But I finished college, went to college after kids a little older and I got my fellowships

and my bachelor's in business management, and I've just mainly been working day to day.

I've been a waitress, I've been a hostess, and now I've been an insurance agent, and

now I'm working for a bus company, Cleveland RTA bus company now.

Love it.

Love it.

Thank you very much for that again, welcome to the network.

Let's jump in again.

I'm going to hold off on the questions that I have, but tell us a little bit more about

your book.

Give us a brief synopsis so we know what to expect when we pick it up.

Well, my book, it was inspired because my son was in a car accident, he, him and a friend

of his.

The car accident left him in a coma for 13 months, it was really touching to know what was

going to happen.

The whole 13 months and one of the doctors said there was nothing my second do.

I figured I would just lean on God.

God allowed just to happen, so now God, I need some answers.

And I let God lead me and guide me through the whole process.

I didn't go to my church, which I belong to a church, I didn't come to lean on friends.

I just didn't want all those different voices talking to me.

I want it, God, so I figured that it's up to you, me and you.

And I honed in and let God do it.

And my book came about, I was journalizing and I wanted Carlos to know that everything

he went through while he was in a coma, so I would write it down every day.

I was just journal and journal.

And then one day, I said write the book.

Thank you very much for that and listen, a great segue that you've established, right?

Because listen, man, you're talking about all of the voices that you were hearing and

that you wanted to silence them so you can hear God's voice.

And that's where I want to go next because listen, this is something that I think every

believer, right?

Every faith-driven person, they search for that, whether they're in a catastrophic situation

like you or just in everyday life, right?

I mean, I think we're all constantly trying to look out for God's voice, right?

And what it sounds like and being able to delineate between our own voice, right, our

own conscience in our head, I want to go there next because your book hinges on hearing

that voice.

Well, in a moment of such profound medical crisis, how did you learn to distinguish God's

voice from the desperate whispers of your own heart?

Because listen, I say it, man, as a parent, and I started off by talking about this, as

a parent myself, and I'm sure everybody out there listening in, all the parents out there

can relate.

Man, if I'm in that situation, whew, I feel I'm trying to tell myself whatever I need

to do to get through the moment.

So I know I would be confused, like, is this just my desperate voice talking to me, or

is this in fact God's voice?

How did you delineate that?

The way I knew it was when I was giving a choice that the doctor asked me, did I want

to go full speed ahead, and do all we could save them, or did I want to let them go

and let them go comfortably?

And I said I needed a day or two to think about it, I have to think, I have to make a decision

at the moment.

And when I went home, and I sat on the couch, and I tried to figure out what I'm going

to do, and I'm like, God, what do I do?

What do I do?

And all of a sudden, there's this voice that full speed ahead.

And you know, I looked around, okay, now I know I wasn't thinking, that wasn't me.

And then I said, what should I do, and it said, full speed ahead.

And then I just got the confidence down.

I just knew that wasn't me.

I wasn't saying that.

And I did know God speaks back, and did not know that.

I mean, I wanted to church on my life, but I tell people, I was giving a foundation.

I didn't even tell what to do with the bricks.

So I did just sit, no.

And yeah, he will really speak to your conscious.

Sometimes there's all the good voices.

Sometimes there's dreams.

And sometimes there's just a knowing.

And that time, there was the voice of my head.

There's just a full speed ahead.

And I went back to them, Doc, he said, what's my family?

And I said, full speed ahead.

Well, listen, people, I'm going to tell you one thing, okay.

A full speed ahead on heading on over to Amazon and Barnes and Noble

and purchasing your copies of this book, okay.

My journey, my lost man, is something that you need to add to your shelf.

It is going to keep you engaged, but it's also going to inspire.

It's going to solidify that fundamental faith, right?

That foundation of faith that you have within you.

And hopefully, it's going to help connect you to that voice,

to God's voice within you, because I know we're all searching for it.

You know, my follow-up that I want to go into now,

Darnies, in the blurb, in the description of your book,

there's a beautiful phrase gracefully broken.

And I love that.

Like, I remember, again, my team and I researching the book

and having our discussions, that was a phrase that the moment I saw it,

stopped me in my tracks.

It is, it's a powerful phrase.

And I want to explore that a little bit further.

In your opinion, what is the difference between being broken by despair

and being gracefully broken?

Well, when I mean by gracefully broken,

actually, it was a song I heard, and it just resonated with me.

And I was like, that's what happened.

I've been gracefully broken.

It's like, I saw it, but I just went down to nothing to build me back again,

but did it gently.

Even though my son was going through God, was right there.

I started receiving dreams.

And I started being 20 to people who helped me interpret the dreams.

And some of the dreams, let me know it would be a tragedy.

But then in the end, he was always okay at the end of the dream.

But I started getting the grasp in it that, okay, Carlos is about to have an affection

or about to get sick, but he's going to be okay.

But those dreams started letting me know that's how I started besides

when the dreams, okay, if I had a bad dream and I ended up,

and it was never him in the end, it was always like a blank figure in it.

And I was going to be hugging a man, a person.

And that's when I started knowing that it was him going through a trial and tribulation.

But then in the end, he would always be okay.

Yeah.

So that's how God started walking through.

That's why I said, he just gracefully did it.

He let me know what was going to happen.

And then he also let me know what's going to be okay.

Now I have those dreams over and over for a minute.

And that's how he talked to me.

He just started dreaming.

Darni's, you touched on this earlier in the interview,

but I want to explore it further.

I often thought, listen, I love having guests on our network that have written

memoirs, right?

I've written books based upon personal experience because I think there's a lot of wisdom to be

gained there, to be found there from a reader's perspective, although I understand that from

your perspective, yeah, that wisdom can be gained, but it also is reopening a wound.

And I know in your instance, again, this was something that was dictated to you from

God, right?

I don't think that from an inspiration standpoint, it was really his doing that pushed you there.

But listen, it's undeniable that you lived through this unimaginable experience and then

you chose to relive it by writing it down.

Was the process of writing your book an extension of the healing process or did it in fact reopen

wounds that you thought were healed that maybe weren't?

Talk to us a little bit more about that experience and that writing process.

Oh, when I began writing books, it was very hard, it was very hard to relive everything

and to really write it down in detail the way it happened.

A lot of times, I would start writing and I would have to stop because I couldn't stop

crying.

Sometimes, before I wrote, I would have to stop and pray, Holy Spirit, please.

And then I even went back and read something like, oh, I wrote that because of something

like, you know, that was not me, but when it came out, I'm like, wow, Holy Spirit really

wrote that because I don't think like that, but it took a lot of, I couldn't write

for a month and I'd take it up and put it down and I'd take it back up and then I'd

pray and I'd ask them by, and I'd say, Lord, please help me because that was 2020 and

he was there.

If you finish in this season, I will bless it.

So once I got that word, I kept writing and I kept writing and I kept stopping and I kept

writing.

I just had to push through.

Oh, it was very hard.

The aches, the pains, everything back.

It was like, because it was not even a year afterwards that I went to write it.

So it was very fresh, rereading that and rewriting it.

Yeah.

It was hard.

But it got great from God's help.

You can do it.

Yeah.

No, listen, I think that's a great point to bring up and listen, as we close out my final

question for you here, Darni says, what are you hoping readers take from the book?

I mean, listen, when they go through when they journey alongside you on this path, once

they close that final page, what are you wanting them to think?

What are you wanting them to take with them upon conclusion?

I want the seal guide when they read it.

I want them to come out knowing that there's hope and that you do not have to carry the

pain of loss with you forever.

I want you to know that that will give you a comfort beyond your own understanding that

he will actually do that.

I want you to understand that you can deal with it.

You can live with the loss.

Things does get better.

I will speak and he will guide you.

No matter how hard it is, if you lean into God and you allow him to walk you through it,

he will speak to you, he will show you, he will even hold your hand and he will let you

know, it's okay.

I am right here.

He will do it.

It sounds hard and it is hard.

It's nothing easy about it.

And if you just let God do it, I want someone safe to be strengthened knowing that it does

get better and it will get better.

So I first pray that it strengthens somebody in their faith and their walk and their prayer

life.

I have no doubt that is exactly what's going to happen.

I really do mean this man.

Like I challenge each and every one of you listening and although I don't even think it needs

to be a challenge man, like you listen to the discussion today and you know how valuable

this book is.

And I know a lot of you are already heading on over to Amazon and Barnes and Noble and

you're getting ready to purchase your copies of my journey, my Lose Man.

What I loved so much about this discussion is it's just a reminder for me as I reflect.

Like we live in a world that often tells us to rely solely on what we can see.

But what's beautiful about this journey and what is beautiful about what Darni says informed

us today is she reminds us of the power of turning into what we can feel.

And I think that's such a key point man, like we're always looking, as I mentioned, like

we're looking for God.

We're looking for those obvious signs and trust me.

Like I'm right there with you man, like I wish that it was something as simple as I

could just pick up the phone man.

I'm dialing the number and I got Jesus on the other line he's talking to me, right?

Like man, that'd be fantastic.

It doesn't happen that way.

And just because we don't see it doesn't mean it isn't happening, doesn't mean there

aren't forces behind the scenes that are pulling strings together to make us okay.

And it's like, you know, I firmly believe this.

I've said this a number of times in the past, like I believe that God doesn't place anything

on our path that we aren't strong enough to overcome.

Now, I may not feel like that in the moment, but I firmly believe it.

And I believe that her story is a testament that even when we are shocked by tragedy,

we possess the strength to be, as she said, gracefully broken and mended back together.

So you already know, man, head on over there, purchase your copies of this amazing book

and remember that sometimes the most profound healing starts and you finally let go.

Dardis, this has been, this has truly, this has been an inspiration.

This has been a wonderfully delightful conversation.

Thank you once again for being a guest on People of Distinction.

Thank you.

I'm on it.