Grow, Become, Love, Alone: Nicole Wordlaw

Clinical psychologist and longtime Buddhist meditator Dr. Nicole Wordlaw joins us to talk about her new memoir, Waking Up Alone: Navigating the Narrow Passage Through Master-Slave Narratives. Nicole came to practice to end suffering, and found instead that enlightenment as an arrival, all bliss, all peace, was one more construction of the conditioned mind. The conversation moves through the single pattern she came to see beneath white supremacy, patriarchy, and the harm spiritual teachers do to their students; writing as prayer; pain as a door; and the intergenerational line of women whose voices run through the book. A tender and unflinching conversation about telling the whole story, uprooting the internal oppressor, and the quiet, still voice that always sounds like Love.

Dr. Nicole Wordlaw is a clinical psychologist and longtime practitioner of Buddhist meditation whose work bridges psychology, spirituality, and identity. The daughter of a white mother and a Black father, Dr. Wordlaw brings a deeply personal understanding of belonging and self-discovery to her writing and teaching. A Stanford University graduate with honors and distinction, she went on to earn her Ph.D. in clinical psychology from UC Berkeley. In her forthcoming book Waking Up Alone, she vulnerably shares her story of trauma and awakening, and offers gentle guidance for her readers to tune into the quiet voice of truth within.

Topics

• 00:00:00 — Introduction
• 00:01:00 — Coming to Buddhism
• 00:02:00 — Enlightenment as construction
• 00:05:00 — Love meeting pain
• 00:06:00 — One pattern of harm
• 00:09:00 — Writing as prayer
• 00:11:00 — A naked story
• 00:15:00 — Somatic abolitionism
• 00:19:00 — A long line of women
• 00:23:00 — Shadow and teacher misconduct
• 00:24:00 — The Sangha Sutra
• 00:34:00 — Risking making sense to no one
• 00:38:00 — The Word Story
• 00:42:00 — The inner teacher
• 00:47:00 — Love is not an idea

Resources & Links

Dr. Nicole Wordlaw

• Website: nicolewordlaw.com
• Waking Up Alone: Navigating the Narrow Passage Through Master-Slave Narratives — out now
• Substack

Referenced in the conversation

• Sounds of SAND — Somatic Abolitionism: Resmaa Menakem & Gabor Maté
• Sounds of SAND — The Architecture of Silence in Spiritual Culture
• Steve Hagen — Buddhism Plain and Simple
• Nisargadatta Maharaj — I Am That 

Contact SAND

• [email protected]
• Support the mission of SAND and the production of this podcast by becoming a SAND Member