Growing Beyond Conflict: The Power of Polarity Thinking for Healing, Thriving, and Becoming Wiser

Ep. 197 (Part 1 of 3) | Polarity management pioneer and author Barry Johnson and adult development expert Beena Sharma are masterful teachers on the subject of polarities and what polarity thinking can bring to the world, benefitting our well-being at every level. Together they explain what polarities are, why they matter, how to apply and leverage them, and the essence of polarity wisdom: pursuing the upsides of opposite poles. Barry is careful to explain that although either/or thinking is the root of our troubles, both/and thinking by itself isn’t the answer either. Integrating either/or with both/and thinking and recognizing the interdependence of all things is the road to transformation and, Beena adds, the engine of human development, of human maturity.

Barry explains the profound spiritual understanding foundational to polarity wisdom and Beena details how polarities shift according to our developmental stage. Each of the polarities discussed—justice/mercy, claiming power/sharing power, being/doing, to name a few—illuminates its sphere, whether it relates to democracy, social justice, or spiritual practice. Barry and Beena are passionate about the promise of polarity thinking and their excitement is contagious in this fast-paced, delightfully lucid dialogue, jam-packed with information that is practical, inspiring, and potentially life changing. Recorded May 22, 2025.

“Either/or thinking without both/and thinking is the root cause of poverty, racism, sexism, and war.”

Topics & Time Stamps – Part 1

• Introducing polarity management pioneer & author Barry Johnson and adult development expert Beena Sharma (00:48)
• How did Barry discover polarities? (02:15)
• The essential dimension of polarities—interdependent pairs—and the universal interdependence of all of life (03:08)
• The capacity to integrate and recognize interdependence is the driving force of adult human development (03:47)
• The difference between polarity management and polarity wisdom (05:37)
• A key polarity in leadership and democracy: claiming power & sharing power (07:20)
• Experiential exercise: the infinity loop (08:11)
• What is true for all polarities: each pole brings something special that is essential to the relationship (11:15)
• The integrating wisdom that includes and transcends both polarities encompasses all dualities, reflecting traditional East Indian wisdom (12:12)
• As a leader, how can we be both clear & flexible, self-assured & humble, and as an organization, centralized & decentralized? (13:51)
• The oscillation between activity and rest (14:55)
• Leveraging polarities: maximizing upsides and minimizing downsides (16:22)
• Either/or thinking is essential, but it needs to be supplemented with both/and thinking (16:34)
• Privileging one pole as better, you enter into dysfunction (19:33)
• Interpersonal relationships: we see the positive value of our preferred pole but the downside of the other’s opposite preferred pole (20:56)
• The essence of polarity wisdom: embracing the wisdom of the opposite pole (21:41)
• Polarity thinking is an antidote to rigidity; it heals polarization (22:25)
• Either/or thinking without both/and thinking is the root cause of evil (23:09)
• Pursuing justice to the neglect of mercy (its interdependent pole) (26:47)
• Does both/and thinking require a certain level of maturity? (32:14)

Resources & References – Part 1

• Barry Johnson, And: Making a Difference by Leveraging Polarity, Paradox, or Dilemma
• Barry Johnson, Polarity Management: Identifying and Managing Unsolvable Problems
• Beena Sharma, founder Vertical Development Academy (VeDA)
• Desmond Tutu, No Future Without Forgiveness
• The 8 Stages of Vertical Development with Beena Sharma (Deep Transformation podcast)

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Barry Johnson, Ph.D., is a founder of Polarity Partnerships LLC, whose mission is to “enhance our quality of life on the planet by supplementing Or Thinking with And Thinking.” Barry has been involved in movement politics since his first march on Washington in 1963; in 1970 he turned his attention to understanding how systems became dysfunctional and how to co-create systems that worked for everyone. In that pursuit, the first polarity map and set of principles were generated. Barry has worked with organizations large and small, including business, industry, governments, educational and healthcare systems, and movement organizations to discover how And Thinking can be useful in accomplishing their mission. Barry’s recent work has been focused on how a polarity lens can be useful in addressing the rise of authoritarianism in the United States and around the world.

Along the way, Barry published three books and coordinated the publishing of a fourth: Polarity Management: Identifying and Managing Unsolvable Problems, Managing Polarities in Congregations: Eight Keys for Thriving Faith Communities, with Roy Oswald, And: Making a Difference by Leveraging Polarity, Paradox or Dilemma, Volume One, and And, Volume 2, Applications (written by 54 professionals who have applied And-thinking in their settings).

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Beena Sharma currently stewards Vertical Development Academy (VeDA) as its founding president, with a vision to enhance the practice of human development in service of civilizational resilience. Beena’s focus is on facilitating human maturity through a deep appreciation of the theory and practice of adult learning that catalyzes the development of wiser, more integrated human beings who can respond to personal, interpersonal, community, and larger systems challenges in more adequate ways. One of Beena’s unique contributions lies in leveraging the wisdom of polarities in service of human maturity, and Beena is one of the world’s leading teachers of polarity thinking. Beena is currently working on launching services that seek to build polarity wisdom in leaders and organizations around the world.

Beena is a gifted master coach, consultant, teacher, and thought leader. She has been recognized nationally and internationally for her achievements in successfully conceptualizing, developing, and delivering systemic leadership development initiatives. She is a regular keynote faculty member for McKinsey’s Executive Leadership Program serving leaders in Australia and New Zealand, and has led efforts as an executive and consultant for various agencies of the US Government, leading private sector companies in healthcare and other industries in the US, UK, Europe, Russia, Brazil, South Africa, and India.

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Podcast produced by Vanessa Santos and Show Notes by Heidi Mitchell