Here Comes The Drama | Reading Reddit Stories

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Hello, welcome to Smoshreads Reddit Stories.

I'm Shane and today's theme is wedding and I'm joined by two people who are about to get married

right now.

Courtney and Rasha.

It's us, yes.

Actually, guys, I have to tell you something.

This is so crazy.

I'm actually not getting married.

Wait, what?

I know.

I know.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

What if you're going by a Russia and only a Russia so that one day you could be a Russia?

Miller.

That was the plan.

Actually, though, I don't know if I told you guys too because Rory the other day was here

and saw the save the date on the fridge and came over and was like,

oh my god, I didn't know you were getting married.

You got one last person.

Oh, I get last casualty.

But I was like, oh, that saved the date so hideous.

And that's that's wow.

Are you offended that they thought that was real?

Yeah.

That's tough.

Yeah, they were like, I wasn't going to say anything, but green.

Oh my god.

Well, today we have a ton of wedding stories.

We've done wedding stories before and they're always the best.

Yeah.

They're the most drama-filled.

Emily and Bailey have found a new subreddit that they've been scouring

called Wedding Shaming.

Ooh.

They've had some stories from there in the past,

but they've really delved into it.

And boy, do people make some choices at weddings?

Oh, yeah.

So I've heard.

I wonder if there would be like ring talk in it, too.

Ring talk.

You know, like ring talk.

Ring, ring.

I'm assuming there's some of that.

I'm assuming someone's going to wear a white tool wedding.

Oh, of course.

Oh, but I never understand that choice that people make.

They know it's such a blatant rule.

Yeah.

But people go for it.

I assume with those rules, maybe there are just outliers, though, right?

Like genuinely, people that haven't caught up with.

Some people don't know.

Some people just think they're above rules sometimes.

That's true.

But I'm special, though.

Yeah, that's true.

But it's a really cute white dress.

But it's so cute.

It's so cute.

Shane, can I say the joke?

Can I say the joke?

Say the joke.

Welcome to Weeding Wedded Wedding Stories.

Let's just cut that and put it into the beginning.

Into the beginning.

They'll fix it in the edit.

Yeah.

That was what you're going to make it work.

Yeah.

Um, shall we hop into our first wedding story?

Okay.

Yes.

Let's just all get married at the end of this.

Yeah, that'll be great.

Yeah, I've never been, I've never been.

Okay.

And then you know, we could leave Shay now.

Just okay.

Okay, we're good.

Okay, yeah.

Our first story comes from wedding shaming.

This was posted a few months ago.

I was in recording this.

I recently went to a wedding reception

where the seating arrangements were alphabetical

by first name.

Oh, fun.

All the ants and bobs at one table,

all the Joes and Katie's at another,

regardless of whether or not any of them knew each other.

If you came as a plus one and didn't know

anybody besides your date, too bad.

No exceptions.

Strictly alphabetical.

Except for my one friend, Caitlin,

who was seated at the K table for some reason.

No, I still don't know why.

Sounds like a typo.

Okay.

There was one table that was pretty much just

women named Sue, Susan, Suzanne,

who didn't know each other.

There was one table where a guy I know,

his current girlfriend and his ex

all got seated together.

Oh.

Basically, everybody ended up standing

around the edges of the room all night at it

because I've answered this 10,000 times already.

Caitlin's name was spelled correctly

on the seating chart and on her place card.

That's why it's funny that she was seated at the K table.

No, it wasn't a hastily corrected spelling error.

The seating chart was hand-inked calligraphy

without any awkward crossouts.

They wrote Caitlin on purpose in the middle of a bunch of K names.

That's why it was worth commenting on.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

And at number two, can we please all chill out a little?

Nobody died.

Nobody cried.

Some people swapped seats around

and it made for a good story.

At the end of the day, it was a nice wedding.

Also, we all know the one thing that really matters

that a reception is that the food was damn good.

Okay. Wow.

I'm gonna be honest after all of this

because the wild choice, after all of this,

I have a couple thoughts just about O.P.

I love this.

I love this.

It wasn't their wedding.

It was just a wedding they went to.

That's supposedly that was not a shaming,

but it has me wondering if O.P.

If this was their wedding and they're like,

ah, this is crazy.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, they did this.

And then it's like, edit too.

Stop!

Guys, they're gonna chill out!

Stop!

But even regardless of that,

I love when people post things,

this goes for anywhere on social media.

When they post things and then they're surprised

by the internet being the internet.

Right, yeah.

You see it a lot on TikTok,

where they're like, guys, my boyfriend's so crazy,

he doesn't wash the dishes.

And then the next one's like,

guys, stop being mean to my boyfriend.

Don't make these actually great.

He loves me very much, just teasing him.

You put this out?

Yeah.

The internet was the internet.

100%.

That is so interesting.

It very much could be.

Because it feels like a bold choice

that's almost like a joke.

Like, it was meant to make everyone mingle.

Exactly.

Yeah, yeah.

It was supposed to be like,

a cute, quirky, everyone get to know each other.

Yeah.

Maybe Caitlin was at the wrong table

because it's like,

K-tlin.

Like, K-tlin.

Oh.

Oh.

K-tlin.

Like, it's because it's K-tlin.

K-tlin.

Yes.

Yes.

K-tlin.

That's really good.

See, and that tells me that these people are funny.

They have a good idea of like,

oh, wait, that's like smart.

Yeah.

Wait, K-tlin.

This is really quirky and cool.

Oh.

But it is.

I think that's really funny.

That is something that like from our view,

not attending this wedding,

not having to sit by your ex or anybody like that.

It is funny from afar.

It's all, yeah.

It has been thinking of a lot of fun ways

to have seating arrangements

that are also extremely messed up.

But like, to organize the entire seating chart

by height difference.

So, tallness to shortest.

And you just, please don't tell anybody.

And they'll show up and they're all there.

They're like, I think everybody at that table's really tall.

And we're all really short.

I know what table I would want to be at.

Yeah.

You organize it by like hottest to least hottest.

And nobody knows that every time they're like, wait a second.

It was like funniest.

Yeah, you don't tell people what it's ranked on.

It's just like, at some point in the day,

the groom is just like, just so you know,

we see that you all in a specific order.

You must figure out what the criteria is.

Oh my god.

Let me have an ensue.

Honestly, really fun.

A really awesome.

Really awesome.

No, no, so awesome.

Because at the table,

then it makes everybody be like, okay,

so what do we all have in common?

What are we?

What are we?

What are we?

So wait, what are we?

Yeah.

It's like we were all placed here for a reason.

Why?

Ugh.

Could be a really fun, horrible game to play.

Yeah.

Murder mystery in the night.

I like it.

Yeah.

Courtney, you and I would not be sitting close together at all.

No.

I'd be so far away.

No, that's fun.

Who would have you with?

How would you have a chance?

Oh, yeah.

I'd give you Damien.

Let me be my Spencer.

Lucky.

I'd be my, I'd be my, I'd be my, you'd be the triple A.

I'd be by Amanda and Angela.

My triple A.

Triple A would be there.

A scratch-letting, chance, Courtney, Damien, Bailey.

Let's make this, let's make this the video.

Tommy would be close, just got your eye.

Let's just build the Smosh Table assignment.

Yes.

Somebody went out there and designed this.

Someone won't make it.

I remember planning an event similar to this

where I thought a version of seating with some mingling

involved would be fun, but it seemed like at the end

that people preferred just to be with the people they knew.

Because you know, people are anxious

and like to be with their friends.

And you're also stuck there, kind of.

Yeah.

Lettings are designed also, I mean, not designed,

but they're a great opportunity for a family to get together.

So you kind of remove that element.

It's like a reunion.

It, yeah.

Yeah, I think it's also particularly

cruel to separate the plus ones.

Oh, that's a rough.

That's so messed up.

Like, you came with somebody to this wedding,

and then you're like, have fun with them.

With the steak, you know?

Yeah.

Because weddings, like, people plus ones to a wedding,

it's kind of like a romantic thing.

People like see it as a cable.

You go to this wedding with me and you're like,

oh, so we're in a rom-com now.

Yes.

So that, and then you show up and then you can't sit with them.

And then, but that's also the funny scene in the rom-com

where you like, I guess I'm stuck with these weird people.

Yeah, I see the day across the place being

funny with the other people.

And you're like, he's really great, isn't he?

Yeah.

And then we were eventually.

Yeah, you know.

He's really cool, huh?

Yeah, I think he's going to be the one.

You bet his name starts with his...

Too bad his name starts with the Z.

Zander.

Zander!

Oh, that's an X.

They spelled K-1 with a K.

Zylophone.

We have comments here.

Someone said, this person loves an icebreaker

at a professional meeting.

Icebreakers mentioned.

Someone said, I'll do you one better.

I once was at a wedding where, at one point,

all the guests had to form two circles,

one inside the other.

So you would face another guest, every couple,

then had to hold each other's hand,

and everyone sang a little song about how happy they were

that the other person was here today.

And then the inner circle rotated,

so you had to do the exact same thing with a new person.

Okay.

And again and again and again.

What are you doing?

That's a, that's a, that's a cult.

No, no, see, that's not fun.

That, no, I'm not a couple, please.

You are here.

I, I love how, I love how I am really,

I was like, hello?

I love how I immediately know that that was a dry wedding.

Like, I'm like, that was a dry wedding.

That, you're not doing that shit when you're dry.

They were all so stoned.

Hammer.

And that was not in the plan.

And they all collectively did it.

So happy.

Guys, the T-dos is telling us to do this.

Someone said, why on, why on earth would anyone do this?

Laziness and lack of emotional intelligence is my guess.

OP said not laziness and not ill intentions.

Yeah.

This was, oh, this was OP's wedding.

I think this was OP's wedding, yeah.

Not laziness and not ill intentions.

I think the groom genuinely thought it was a fun way

to get all the different people.

He and the bride.

Okay, I think the groom was really fun.

The groom was really handsome.

Who's really hot and has a huge dick, by the way.

I think, I think it was, I think it was a great idea.

Yeah, yeah.

Just completely out of left field to these comments.

You're like, I think the groom is packing.

Just, you know, I got that sense.

It's like great, but the alphabetical thing.

So the alphabetical thing was weird, though.

It's like, no, that was fucking weird.

Only someone who's packing heat can do that.

Okay, someone else said, if my wife and I went to a wedding

with this BS, then we would just ignore the seating chart

and sit together.

Oh, he said we did smiling face.

Okay, so it didn't, it didn't matter.

Huh, huh.

We did smiley face.

We did smiley face.

We did smiling face.

This was OP's wedding.

Yeah, that was your fucking wedding.

Yeah, OP, we know.

You abandoned the seating chart

because you were up at the altar.

You wanted to put a post on wedding shaming to see

that everybody thought your idea was actually amazing

and they weren't going to shame it.

And it didn't work.

That's slipping past us.

That's right.

Fuck you, next story.

Oh.

Just kidding, I hope is a lovely ceremony.

If I did go to a wedding, I think I'm the type

if I went to a wedding and it was seated that way

which is so absurd and chaotic,

I don't think I'd be mad about it.

I'd be like, this is crazy.

Yeah.

Like I would get mad if it was like,

if it was designed in a way,

like very intentionally that also split people up,

this was just a pure chaos move.

I do, I'd like a break in the simulation moment.

Yeah, when you break the simulation,

you're like, what is even his seating?

Yeah, you know?

Your outies come out.

Your outies are out, the ines are in.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

And these are, they're like.

Wake up.

I'm here.

They're like, all right, you're seating chart.

You will find your name on a table.

There will also be another name on the table

that is your target.

Find them, find them, kill them.

They're searching for you too.

Yeah, they're packing the group.

The group, it'll only the group as it goes.

As a big gun.

All right.

OK, we must move on.

OK.

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Now, back to the show.

So I can read more Reddit Stories.

That's all I do anymore.

It's fine.

Our next story comes from wedding shaming.

My cousin faked her own wedding to get money and gifts.

That's just wrong.

That's just wrong.

That's so, so bad.

I can't even touch Horrible.

I can't even touch Horrible.

That's just so wrong.

Pranking about being married is horrible.

Like what?

Did she like make save the dates and stuff?

That's awful.

Did she do it on April Fool's Day?

What a best.

That's the worst of it.

What a huge piece of shit.

Yeah.

Yes, you read the title correctly.

This happened almost 20 years ago

and is still talked about amongst my family.

My cousin declared to all of us

that she met this great man.

Six months or so later, they were expected to be married.

Now, my cousin had lucked out

because my mom and aunts agree to prepare all of the food.

The wedding venue was at my uncle's house, not her dad.

He has a huge amount of land,

so the ceremony was set up outside with chairs

and there were tents put up for the reception and the food.

My mom's side of the family is big.

We have people all over the country

and some even overseas.

So we had over a hundred people

who agreed to travel far in Yonder,

rent cars and get hotels in order to attend this wedding.

Oof.

See, I didn't do that.

The morning of my cousin, the bride,

was acting so sketchy.

She was so reluctant to get ready.

She kept taking off her gown

and putting on casual clothing.

We were all so confused.

We thought she had cold feet.

Meanwhile, my mom and aunts were sweltering

in the kitchen, preparing all of this food

for all these people.

Someone noticed she kept making trips to her car

and would come back to the house,

but we were all so busy setting everything up

that we didn't focus on it too hard.

What made matters worse, the groom was nowhere to be found.

People kept telling her to call him.

She did and apparently it kept going straight to voicemail.

Guests are arriving, preparations are being made

and the groom isn't here for his wedding.

We are questioning her and asking her

what the hell is going on

and she says he had a meeting yesterday in New York

but he was supposed to come back last night but didn't.

Making it seem like he stood her up.

Instantly, we deflated because we could tell

that she was lying.

She went outside for a moment.

My aunt took her phone and looked at her call history.

She never called him once.

We all started screaming,

wondering what the hell is she trying to pull here?

My aunt calls him and he picks up.

She asks him where he is.

He says, I'm in New York for business.

She's questioning him.

How are you on business the day of your wedding?

I'm sure none of you are surprised by the fact

that he had no idea there was a wedding.

Let alone a wedding.

She was supposed to be getting married in.

He was in shock and couldn't believe

my cousin did all of this.

But he said he never proposed to her

and planned to be away this weekend

and she knew that.

We all go outside to confront her

and she's gone in the wind.

Gone in the wind.

Gone in the wind.

Gone in the wind.

She's gone in the wind.

She's gone in the wind.

Those trips to the car she was taking,

we found out later from her son

she was taking gifts and money off the table

as they arrived and stowing them in her car.

My uncle said when she came outside,

she tried to grab more,

but he stopped her from grabbing them so soon

because it looked tacky.

Not having any idea that was the whole point

for this entire charade.

He made a joke later that night.

Well, yes, this was just another family reunion.

Moments after that people were just going back and forth

about all the money they spent.

My mom spent over $700 on groceries for the wedding.

$300 rents in a car and money for a hotel.

My dress was, I don't even remember how much

from David's bridal.

I was her flower girl who never got to do her job.

Whenever I share this story with people,

they find it insane.

I absolutely agree.

But looking back on it,

it kind of makes me chuckle at how ridiculous it is.

She's still very much as the black sheep of the family.

Unfortunately, this is not the worst thing

she's done at our expense.

What?

Whoa!

This isn't the worst.

Don't still talk to her?

How did she show back up?

That's why.

How do you show back up after that?

That's why.

The reason I thought it was going to be like a heist

and her and the boyfriend did it together,

but no, he was none the wise.

No, he had a meeting in New York.

And she was gone in the wind.

It's actually, it's so sad to think about

all the stuff that she did wrong.

Like, incredibly inappropriate for her

to just involve her family overall.

What a terrible heist.

Rava Bank.

Like, at least Rob, someone you're not going to see again.

Right, it's wild.

You don't care about your family at all.

Not at all, at all.

I get infuriated when people do bad things.

I get really mad when they do them really stupidly.

Because I'm like, not only are you doing a bad thing,

you're also insulting everyone's intelligence.

You're doing a bad thing, too.

You're doing it badly and stupidly.

Yeah.

But I'm like, you're trying to get free gifts and money.

So you staged a wedding with your entire family there.

That's why.

To rob your family and just leave.

I'm like, you, okay.

But she kind of pulled it off.

I hope those gifts and money were worth losing your entire,

she didn't lose her entire family.

They're back.

They were fine.

She showed up the things giving and she was like,

hey.

Yeah.

And they were like, hey, that wasn't okay.

She's like, I'm sorry.

This is the last time she's ever going to see them.

It's truly like, I would never,

like, how could you do that with any inkling

that you might see them again?

Yeah.

It seems like they don't care.

That's just attached to her.

And it's not even her worth defense.

And this family is, seems very forgiving.

They're like, yeah.

It's been $700.

Well, that's not even the worst thing she's doing.

I know.

I'm sure they were like willing to go this far.

Like, I'm sure I'm sure they have any trust for her.

Does she have a name?

No.

I don't believe it.

I don't remember.

Caitlin.

Oh, there.

Classic Caitlin.

Classic Caitlin.

OP did comment other offenses.

Worse offenses to name some.

She's taken scholarship money for college from her son

and used it for her own benefit.

He never ended up going to college.

She stole Social Security checks from my aunt with dementia,

who was in her care, and has gotten involved

with grimy people just to make money.

Why are you talking?

Oh, well, there you go.

No, why are you talking to her?

She's a scammer.

She's a famously known scammer and a family.

Wow.

Holy crap.

How did they fall for the wedding?

Wow.

She has a kid?

I'm just saying.

Old school.

Yeah.

Like, I'm having a hard time being with her.

Like, hey, I'm good for the money.

Come on.

She made a couple thousand.

She made it.

Make you look like a pastor.

A saint.

You got to up your game.

I did nothing wrong.

You got zero money out of my life.

She's an honest woman.

You did it for the love of the game.

No.

Honestly, I'm having a hard time not being impressed.

This is, she pulled off a lot.

Awful person.

A terrible.

Kind of cool.

Like, but awful.

Yeah.

Like terrible.

Like terrible.

No, robbing your children, robbing your aunt with dementia, like you're the worst kind

of thief.

Horrific.

And the fact that her family is still keeping her around, it's really sad.

It's so interesting.

I know.

I'm like, wait.

Yeah.

Come on.

Maybe at that point.

Sorry, the sun.

The sun's in college now.

So she's like.

Well, the sun can't.

Well, the sun can't.

He can't go to college because she took the scholarship money.

Yeah.

Okay.

But she said he never ended up going to college.

He never went to college.

This person is not just like a girl in her early 20s, get a little cash, get it back.

Like, this is a grown, grown woman doing this stuff.

And she's just continued to do this.

That sucks.

Yeah.

Someone commented, is the groom still with her?

Or did he leave her after that stunt?

Oh.

Oh, he said, luckily he ended things very quickly after that.

So at least he had the sense to-

She was probably taking money from him too.

Yes.

Someone said, so a whole wedding was planned without anyone really knowing the groom, meeting

his parents or anything like that.

Someone said, due to living in different cities, my mom and sisters-in-law didn't meet until

the wedding day.

It is rare, but it happens.

Oh, he said, like I said, we have family from all over and don't live close.

A lot of us have never even met the man, let alone knew what he looked like.

My cousin's dating history is pretty terrible in itself, so we weren't surprised that she

agreed to get married shortly after meeting him.

But you're entitled to believe what you want.

Last time someone said, love granddad, well, at least we had a family reunion.

Yeah, that's true.

That's an upside.

That's true.

Can't be came an impromptu family reunion with food.

Yeah.

They got to collectively.

Well, guess it was just another family reunion.

Yeah.

We love a common enemy.

Yes.

Yes, she's doing him a favor.

Jesus.

She actually might be a saint, actually.

Yeah.

Honestly, not the asshole.

Honestly, best person we've ever heard.

Wow.

I'm just picturing her with a silk scarf around her hair, and it's flowing in the wind,

and she's driving away on the convertible, and there's a blender in the passenger's seat.

Yeah.

It's gone in the wind.

It's gone in the wind.

It's gone in the wind.

You didn't even get good shit out of this, really.

She got a blender.

You could have gotten a blender.

You could be a better thief.

Right.

She's like Robinhood, except she just steals from her family and gives it to herself.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I'm now trying to think of life events that you can fake and get more money out of.

Um.

Not for me.

Sweet 16.

Do you think anyone's ever faked their own death and gotten their own life insurance money?

Oh, 100%.

People go all the time.

They drive the car off the cliff, leave the license, the driver's license on the car.

But then how do they pick it up the life insurance money?

Because they're dead.

Pretend they call me their mom.

You get a really big treasure.

Hi, this is his mom, and I really need that money.

Yeah.

My son is gone in the wind.

He's gone.

He's gone.

And he's not.

And he's packing.

And he's packing.

You mean, you just want to make sure you know that.

Just need you to know that.

All right.

That's, that's going to be hard to top.

That was a, that was a crazy one.

All right.

Eighteen.

Our next story.

This is comes from Am I the asshole?

Yes.

Am I the asshole for having a no ring, no ring, wedding?

Huh?

No wing, no wing.

No wing, no wing.

Oh, I know this.

I know this.

I think it's, I think it's, I think it's if you're not married to your plus one, they

can't be there.

Oh.

I've never heard of that.

No ring, no ring.

I think.

That's what it sounds like.

Hotline.

Hotline, hotline, ring.

I loved it.

I loved it.

I loved it.

I loved it.

I loved it.

I loved a weird place today, guys.

This is a great discussion to have, so I can't, I can't wait to hear the story.

No ring, no ring, no ring, wedding.

What?

They okay.

Welcome to Weeding, what a story.

All right.

No wing, no wing.

No wing.

Gone into wind.

Using a throwaway account for this, I'm a 32-year-old woman getting married to my

fiance, a 35-year-old man next summer.

We've been together since this January, which might seem sudden, but have been living

together since Easter, and both know that this is the relationship we want to be in forever.

This was posted in November, so they've been living together since Easter, so a half

a year maybe.

I am the last of my core friend group to get married and have, playfully, of course,

been teased about being the last one standing since the second to last friend got married

last year.

That, along with being the youngest sibling and youngest cousin, means that there is

no one important in my life who isn't already married or engaged.

When discussing wedding plans originally and in line with our budget and venue size,

we realize quite quickly that we wouldn't be able to have many if any plus ones.

To me, a plus one is a friend of a friend or unmarried slash not engaged partner.

From everything I knew about my fiance's friends that I'd met, they were all married,

and there is one couple engaged to be married next spring.

He had often mentioned a friend, a 33-year-old man, who lived at the other end of the country

and his partner, 29-year-old woman.

I clarified they were not married or engaged, and so only included the friend on the invite.

What my fiance failed to tell me in advance was that this couple had been together for ten

years, and will never get married due to some kind of trauma that the girlfriend has

from her parents' marriage growing up.

In the no plus one rule, unfortunately I couldn't make an exception for this once I was

made aware.

I was contacted by the wife of my fiance's best man to ask why this friend and girlfriend,

where the only couple to not be invited together, and despite explaining the above, she thinks

I could have been more flexible.

My fiance is concerned that his friend won't attend the wedding.

We are close to the RSVP deadline and we haven't yet had his response.

But my own friends don't see an issue with the no-ring, no-bring as a rule, given how expensive

weddings can be, especially with guests I don't really know.

I personally just don't want to make things awkward at my fiance's friend's wedding in

the spring as we have been told this couple will be attending.

Okay.

That's...

It's like, I made this rule and I can't, I'm sorry, I can't break my, I can't break this

rule.

It's like, you're, it's your wedding, do whatever the hell you want.

Totally, totally.

This is a clear indication of the concept of like keeping something just because it's

a rule or a ritual or a tradition, when it's like, there's exceptions, there's outliers,

like there are reasons to break this made up rule that you made up.

Yeah, like the fact that these people have been together for over 10 years, like, and because

they haven't assumed a traditional role of their relationship, they, like, I'd be like,

dude, there's, there's an imaginary ring, like, like, like, they've been, they've been

together 10 times longer than you guys have, yeah, so, like, that's very silly to even

though the RS U.K. deadline has, haven't, has not happened, like, I thought, like, oh,

it's too late and, like, literally, the wedding's today, but it's like, no, there's time

and you're just choosing to, that just feels very black and white and white and not.

Yeah.

It's like, it's like, you're putting so much value on this concept of marriage and the

ring is so big when it's like, I think when people are trying to use that rule usually,

it's to signify a strength and relationship and a commitment.

And I get the idea of, like, oh, we want people at the wedding who, like, will probably

stick around in our lives, like, eventually they'll get married or, like, we'll see them

down the line.

It may be their wedding, like, that kind of thing.

Right.

But to strictly just be like, if you don't have a ring, then you don't come into the wedding,

like, that rule of string.

Yes.

It's bullshit.

She's trying to remove any responsibility by acting like, oh, this rule was placed upon

me.

It's like, yeah.

You made it a fun rule because you thought it would be in line with everything you were

already going to do.

Turns out that's not the case.

You're going to exclude one couple.

Just let them come and call all your friends who aren't married and say, like, hey, here's

the number that can attend.

So, like, I had to, in order to get everybody, I can't have plus ones for all of you.

I personally think, I think that they're just super into the marketing idea of no ring,

no bring.

So, clearly, she wasn't saying no plus ones unless you have a ring.

It sounds like she was checking if people were engaged or not, married or not.

I was like, okay, they're not.

Okay, I'm only going to put his name on the invite then.

So, it's not even like, oh, it would bring a plus one.

It's like, she's inviting people by name.

Yeah.

It's not like a casual, you can't have a plus one, like, it's just, it's just gymnastics

at that point.

Yeah.

Like, fixated on the expression for some reason.

Yeah.

Like, they like that idea of it.

Yeah.

So, it's really silly.

The verdict is asshole.

But of course.

I also, lastly, I'll say, is like, she's talking a lot about her experience and why this rule

is like funny for her.

We're not hearing much about the groom and it sounds like she's excluding the groom's

friends.

It's sounding selfish, to me.

It seems personal.

Yeah.

Comments.

As someone who had been single for so long, you would think she would be more empathetic

to unmarried people.

She should know better.

You're the asshole.

Someone said, you're the asshole.

I'm sorry.

I thought you and your husband were getting married.

Why is everything about you?

Oh, unfortunately, I couldn't make an exception.

Fuck out of here.

It's your husband's wedding too.

And if he's upset or concerned that his friend can't or won't attend, then why are you

the only one that gets to a say in the matter?

Sounds like you and your friend group put far too much value on a ring.

Someone said, easy fix.

Invite her separately.

I totally get that you don't want people bringing dates just to make up the numbers,

but 10 years is a long-term relationship.

Longer than a lot of marriages.

If it's important to your future hubby to have his friend there, then make this one exception.

Marriage is about compromise.

Who all else is pressuring you for plus once?

This sounds like a non-issue.

Invite their long-term partner and be done with it.

No one else knows the exact nature of everyone who is invited's relationship.

You are impacting your future husband's friendships.

You're the asshole.

Yeah.

I think that's one thing I say too is like, I think whenever we read stories around weddings

and choices made within the wedding, you can't treat it as an isolated choice.

It is a statement toward that relationship.

That choice is a message in a lot of ways.

A lot of choices about weddings are a message.

It's sad that the group's close friend is maybe not going to go because they care about their partner.

They might have been with their partner longer than they knew this friend.

Definitely.

That's just selfish.

I agree.

I think it definitely feels like an individual choice.

What I was going to say earlier that feels peculiar is the way that she described her relationship

to marriage in the beginning of the post.

Talking about how no one pretty much important in her life is unmarried, which I found kind

of strange.

She did declare like, hey, I got teased about being the last one.

Yeah.

As that top comment points out, it's like, hey, you know what it feels like.

Why are you doing this?

Yeah.

It's almost like she wants to turn it around and give some shame to other people now that

she's crossing the finish line.

It kind of reminds me, something that I struggle with a little bit, and I feel like in L.A.,

this is common, of people who are so dedicated to an aesthetic that they're willing to ruin

an event.

You know, it's like, no, this is the theme.

This is the thing.

And it's like, hey, man, due to what you want the optics of it to be, you're making it

a bad time.

Yeah.

Like, that's what she's putting this weird rule on this that is going to ruin it.

It's definitely something deeper, I think, knowing the idea that the relationship that

she has to marriage, this expression, no ring, no ring, I think it is some sort of like

underlying feeling that she has about it, which again, makes sense, but it's important

to dissect and make an exception.

Right.

Yeah.

Update?

Update?

No update.

Save the date?

Gone with the wind update?

Gone in the wind?

Gone in the wind.

Gone.

I see I said it properly that time.

All right.

Well, good luck to them.

Yeah.

Whatever happiness to you, too.

Yeah.

I hope you're happy.

No, no, no, no.

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Now back to the show.

Can you tell this was written by Angela?

This comes from wedding shaming.

Best man's speech was incredibly insulting to the couple.

Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, best man.

We love a horrible best man.

Oh, my God.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

For those of you that don't know me.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yo, Bobby.

Yeah.

This guy's crazy.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

All right.

Here we go.

I was a guest at a wedding, knew both the groom and the bride before they started dating,

and they are both very lovely slash kind people.

The groom's family had an attitude of, it's about time, having seen the groom date

people, party in the city, et cetera.

He was not old by any means, early slash mid-30s.

The best man was the groom's brother, and his speech still lives rent-free in my head.

He got up and started off with some jabs about typical family slash brothers, slash athletic

banter, and then turned to the couple.

He goes on to explain that their relationship is similar to how the groom shops at IKEA.

You go through the store, so many options.

What about that one?

What about this one?

Can't make up his mind so you keep moving, and eventually you get to the warehouse area

where you pick up the parts, and then right before the checkout line, you look to your

left and see the return slash incomplete bin, and grab something out of there right before

checking out.

He chuckles at this point, and the entire audience is silent, except for someone who

audibly says, what the fuck?

That would be Spencer.

And then someone came to grab the mic away from him as he was raising a glass to the couple.

His own brother roasted him and her, comparing her to the last possible option, broken or

damaged.

At one point, a family member of the bride had to be restrained from a fight.

I think it was her cousin slash friend, not sure.

The buffet line was super awkward right after that, and everyone was talking about it for

the rest of the night.

Luckily the couple brushed it off and didn't let it dominate the night.

I would have been out for blood, but they kept it classy.

A distant relative said, I've been going to weddings my entire life, ain't nothing is

bad as that crap.

Wolf.

Okay.

I, like, couldn't even grasp what the best man was saying.

So, yeah, he was saying you go through, like, you see everything, you're like, you're

shopping, you're shopping.

You're shopping.

And then right before you check out an akea, there's the incomplete, there's the broken bullshit

stuff.

Right.

That's really cheap, and you just grab it right before you check out.

I know what's so crazy is like, I'm like, oh, so, what are you, so he's checking out?

He's checking out with some, so I have notes.

I have notes.

It's a bad idea.

It's also one bad idea.

It's like, you've found something great and you're checking out, but also you've found

something lost and damaged in this other section.

Yeah.

It doesn't even work on funny, bad writing.

Yeah.

Like, if you're going to insult someone, at least have it be like a good analogy, right?

Yes.

Like a juicier.

Yeah, this was, this was dumb, and also mean.

And, and your brother?

That is heartbreaking.

Was he drunk?

Was he drunk?

It sounds a little planned though.

It was actually too, it was too good to be like, he might have been drunk, but I think he

kind of thought about this before he was drunk.

You think he thought he was going to like, eat?

I think he thought like, this is awesome.

Is he going to like, eat?

It's, well, well, I mean, look, not reading that hard into it.

It is objectifying too.

Like he had the way he talked about like, I'm like, I think I know what this guy thinks

about women.

Just based on how he's talking about women being things that you go through Ikea and

just grab, whatever.

Even just the idea of shopping.

Yeah.

Like, what?

Hello?

He could pick whatever he wanted, and he chose that broken bullshit.

And I thought the speech was going to go like, and then he looked left, and he saw a gorgeous

juicy, shiny, hot dog at the food court.

And that's all you have.

Yeah.

And you all enjoy that more.

Yeah.

And then, and that joke is gone in the wind.

It would have been, that would have been bad.

I think it does need to get a writer's room.

Yeah.

You in the group.

Let's work track that.

I don't know where there's groom.

And the man's the best man.

You can punch him.

It's mad.

I can punch him.

Punch him up.

It is.

Out of all the, all the wedding speeches I've heard on Reddit stories, that's definitely

in the top three.

That's awful.

And it's not even well constructed.

No, it's poorly written.

I, the couple is, I, I'm very impressed by the couple.

Yeah.

I feel like they're like being classy.

Wow.

I don't know.

I don't know.

I also got to give mad props to the person who in the back just, what the fuck?

Yes.

Yeah.

Did I just hear that?

Right.

Someone needs to do that.

I think the, the couple probably were like, well, everyone got to react for us.

And like, maybe they weren't surprised by this color.

Yeah.

You never know.

Totally.

And it does, like, he did his own change.

That was the best man.

Best man and brother.

Right.

He was, so the brother had to have at least had some respect.

Well, I think some.

Or felt pressured.

Sometimes, like, it's, it depends on where it comes from.

The decisions for a wedding.

It's like, well, I have to make my brother my best man because he's my brother.

True.

A lot of people do it out of obligation, just as you're sibling.

There's reasons.

Cool.

Um, comments.

Everyone wants to be the funny man.

In reality, most people should simply be a little sentimental and a lot concise.

Wedding speeches aren't your opportunity to be a stand-up comedian.

Say something nice about the groom.

Say something nice about the bride.

Say something nice about them as a couple.

Toast and put the microphone down.

Nothing more is needed.

4,000 upvotes.

Someone said, I remember one story here, as an on Reddit,

where they made of honor, a childhood friend of the bride,

decided to regale the guests by sharing how,

when she'd sleep over at the bride's house as kids,

they'd go out into the yard late at night and poop.

In the morning, father of the bride would find it and blame the dog.

So she concluded with a sparkly smile.

Now you know, it was us all along.

By this point, the bride's face could not have been deeper in her palms.

That's an awesome story.

That's a great story.

I would rather the best man take a shit on the floor.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And say that to God.

You can pick up the shit and toss it at me in my white dress.

But don't do that.

But don't call me a piece of furniture.

Someone said, my husband has horrible social anxiety.

And was the best man at his best friend's wedding.

He was dreading the toast and went last.

After everyone had given their long, heartfelt, sometimes funny,

sometimes awkward toasts, people were ready for cake and dancing.

He stood up and just said, I'm so happy for you too.

I love you guys. It was perfect.

Aww.

Someone said, best man sucks but kudos to the person who said,

what the fuck?

And to the mic confiscator.

I've read so many stories of situations in which people were too stunned

to call out the asshole behavior.

Yeah.

Someone said, to be generous, I get that he was maybe trying to say,

hey, my brother found something he wasn't expecting at the last minute.

But not the right comparison.

A friend went to a wedding once when the best man said, you know,

I'm happy for them. She seems fine.

That was apparently not what the best man had meant to say.

But he got stage fright and totally blanked on his speech.

Bride and Grude still gave him a hard time.

Lastly, someone said, what if the bride had just left?

Being compared with damaged things picked up as the last option

is not what you want to hear on your day.

No.

He took us on a journey.

He took us on a really bad journey.

Don't even want to go through IKEA on a good day.

Yeah, IKEA.

I like IKEA for like the first half and then it feels like a movie

that goes on too long where I'm like, all right.

Yes.

Oh, we're bringing up rooms that I forgot about.

This makes me think too, how much of a wedding is just what we do

because it's what other people do?

Like, do we need the maid of honor in the best man's speeches?

Do we need like certain things, you know?

To be whatever you want.

When we did like our big family celebration,

we chose to each do a speech and then we were like,

okay, and then we'll just do no speeches.

Just so it's fair to everyone.

And sometimes I look back and I wish like,

what if I just let them might get passed around?

Like, what would people have said?

Just like, because it could be funny.

What do people, I don't know,

but also you might hear something you never wish you had heard.

Yeah.

But yeah, we chose of like, we will thank everyone for being there

and like, we don't want anybody to feel left out.

What I think about though is like, how many times I hear about like,

when people have these opportunities for speeches and stuff

that's like, don't try to be funny.

Like, it's just, it's like, yeah, if there's something

that's a really sentimental funny joke, sure,

but I'm like, the amount of times that people go for the funny thing

and it's insulting, because it's selfish.

It's like, oh, are you trying to get a laugh?

Yeah.

Or are you trying to make that person feel special?

Like, when you're giving a speech, especially at a wedding,

the point is to give the spotlight,

which is kind of opposite in so many other situations

where you're giving speeches,

because it's maybe it's like, oh, you want an award

or like, you're, you know, like maybe a graduation thing,

but this is a very unique one

where you're not trying to have the spotlight.

And the easiest comedy is just shitting on another person.

Right.

The lowest common denominator.

And it's a wedding jokes are marriage jokes.

I feel like they are originally so deprooted

in just like domestic issues

and just like the old ball and chain me old, right?

Yeah, literally.

Yeah, literally old.

With those speeches too, I find it so funny.

I've gone to a handful of weddings where people,

and you know, with the right amount of taste, you can do it,

but a lot of people also choose to go up there

and make jokes about them being single.

Yeah.

You know?

It's just like, once again,

it's like you're taking the spotlight away.

You're talking about yourself.

Like, it's not like, yes, if I'm a guest at a wedding

where I don't know anybody, I'm entertained by it all.

Yeah, right.

But truthfully, it's like, if you're there

and this is someone you care about

and they're getting married, like,

this is kind of almost more of an opportunity

to talk directly to them and be like,

this is a core memory.

Yeah.

Like, what do I want you to remember forever?

Totally true.

Like instead of thinking about like,

I'm in front of all these people.

It's like, no, you're kind of on the spot for your friend right now.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Just you and them.

Yeah.

You and them.

That's sweet.

Our next one comes from Wedding Shaming.

Another Wedding Shaming story.

They want my daughter to be a flower girl at their wedding,

but I'm not invited.

Oh.

Okay.

Well, that's your relationship.

That's your relationship.

Break it down.

Have I been eating crazy cakes?

Am I off base?

I really need to know.

Have I been eating crazy cakes?

Am I going in the wind right now?

Am I going in the wind right now?

Am I eating crazy cakes?

Am I eating crazy cakes?

Is crazy cakes?

I want to be eating crazy cakes.

That sounds awesome.

Damn.

Oh, damn.

Okay.

Damn.

What?

She was that crazy cake.

I go into Susie.

I go into Susie cakes.

I'm like, you guys have any crazy cakes?

They're like, come with them back.

Yeah.

They're like, dude, you're the one that reads reddest to me.

No.

You read reddest to me.

I'm like, just the cakes, man.

Just the cakes.

Just the cakes.

Just the cakes.

Becky is someone I've known for many years.

We're in the same social circle, more like friends of friends,

but we're not super close.

It's really more like an acquaintance I run into from time to time.

I do see them and hang out with them at gatherings,

probably three to four times per year,

but I've never been to their house nor them to mine.

I'm a single parent to an 11-year-old girl

and I received a call from Becky,

who has never called me in her life before this.

Asking if my daughter would do the honor of being a flower girl

because there are no other young kids in her family.

Side note, my daughter would eat that up.

She'd love to be a flower girl.

I asked for the wedding date and where it was,

and she told me that it was at a winery

in the middle of nowhere,

almost two hours driving from where we live,

but she also said that it's an extremely intimate wedding

for family and a few very close friends.

And unfortunately, there wouldn't be room for me

at either the ceremony or reception.

I'm sure you can understand.

Okay.

I told her I'd have to look into it and call her back

because honestly, I was too stunned to reply.

Listen, I have zero problems not being invited to anyone's wedding.

You do you and your day, no problem.

But let me get this straight.

Becky wants me to spend the time and money

on getting a flower girl dressed in shoes,

drive my kid two hours away to a winery in the middle of nowhere,

and drop her off unsupervised with a bunch of adults.

And I should do what, wait in the car,

wait down the road, wait in the bathroom,

wait in the kitchen with the caterers, LOL.

There isn't even a cafe within a 30-minute drive.

Am I off-base thinking this is just totally bonkers?

No, that's crazy kids.

Totally bonkers.

FBI, open up.

Yeah, I'm like, you're sketchy, dude.

Yes, can you send your child to this winery

in the middle of nowhere unsupervised for us?

Like, what?

Yeah.

That sounds insane.

It's actually like, it's like gross.

It's like weird.

You don't have kids here.

Love it?

Let me take yours.

Yeah, you're 11.

You're all just going to be alone here with a bunch of adults.

They don't know.

At a winery.

Where they're drinking.

Yeah, this is atrocious.

No, that's awful.

They want to cast a flower girl for a wedding

and not even have a chap around for this chat.

It's a child.

Yeah.

No, they're making Ikea, man.

Look really good right now.

Truly, truly.

A flower girl doesn't have to be a child.

Let me show you.

Let me show you.

Why would I eat that up?

I think it could be a sleigh.

Honestly, no, get the oldest person there.

That's the ethic move.

That's awesome.

That's gorgeous.

Have her in a goddess wrap.

Oh.

Fabric.

And the flowers are not in a little basket.

It's in the fruit of the loom baskets.

And she's like holding her under the arm.

She's like, cornucopia.

Dude, she's in so gorgeous.

I'll do you one better.

Get a roomba.

Let it just roll down.

It's going to suck them up, Shane.

It's going to suck the flowers up.

A reverse for firework.

A reverse.

Yeah, a different sweet girl that eats them up.

And then you know what they do?

You know what he's about to use?

You know, Rumba's used to do that.

What?

Sucking air.

Those flowers will be gone in the wind.

They use his wind, I know I love this.

No, so I'm thinking, guys.

Be an alarm, be clapping.

No, this is this is someone who I think has just maybe not been around kids in a long time.

This is creepy as hell.

I don't know how kids work.

They're just like, yeah, can we just grab that kid?

Yeah.

They're like, this is your kid.

Move flowers.

Has a kid.

Let that kid just run around.

Yeah.

Whatever.

We'll give him some wine.

Yeah.

There are so many weddings with no flower girl.

Like literally, you know, if the child isn't significant, they're like, it's a really intimate

wedding, except for this strange child.

Yeah.

We'll be throwing plants.

They're calling up.

They're calling up someone they talk to three times a year.

They're going, yo, can I borrow your kid from my wedding?

Yes, absolutely.

You can't.

You can't.

I'm actually thinking about that now too.

Like somebody that you see three times a year and just being like, can I have your stranger

kid?

I don't think I do it.

I don't think I do it.

It's like, who are you bearing?

She's like, oh, my husband's name is William Afton.

Just like, yeah.

I know.

Yeah, no.

It's Phenath.

It's Phenath.

Phenath.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm like, yeah, okay.

If my daughter wears a body cam, I'm not like that is down the aisle.

So, that is so beyond weird.

I'm reporting you.

I'm recording you with my child's body cam.

Yes.

Um, comments, you're right.

This is bonkers.

I'd be saying no, no matter how much she would love being a flower girl.

I would not be leaving my 11 year old daughter alone with a bunch of people she didn't know

who would be drinking 7,000 up votes.

I think about how scary that is to down the aisle.

Yeah.

Like just a flower girl being like, I don't know anyone.

I mean, she said her daughter would be cool with it.

But the person asking does not know anything about this daughter.

They're just like, yeah, a random kid.

Yeah.

Come on.

Absolutely.

Absolutely.

Of course, I would never want to put a kid in that situation.

No.

I'm sure too, the mom is speaking in a way of like she would love to be the flower girl

surrounded by maybe her relatives, surrounded by like people that she knows and is comfortable

with, but put her in like a strange environment and she's probably like, why am I putting flowers

on the ground right now?

But also like not even having a supervision.

Like, 11 is not even old enough to babysit a younger sibling when the parents are.

Right.

Yeah.

That shouldn't be like-

Look, arguably like kind of the worst age to be stuck at a wedding by yourself, because

you're not like a little tiny kid that doesn't like-

No, it's not.

You're 11.

You're definitely like, what the hell am I doing at this wedding?

Yeah.

But you're also like not a teenager where you're just like, you're like, I don't know, that

would suck.

I would suck.

I'm side eyeing this family for the end of- till the end of time.

Yeah.

I'd be like, you guys are sketchy.

Are you on a list of-

I like that she, I just feel like I have to make note of it.

I like that she was like, let me get back to you.

Yeah.

And so this is like, immediately emotionally reacting and being like, hold on, is this

am I crazy?

Yeah.

And now she has the full wear with all, hopefully to call back and be like, no, definitely

not.

Absolutely not.

Someone else said, it's also a red flag that the bride supposedly doesn't have anyone

closer to her with kids than OP, who's an acquaintance.

If they don't have any kids in their life, why would they want a random one in their wedding

photos?

Someone said, I think the red flag isn't that she doesn't know anyone with kids, but rather

that she wants a child that she doesn't know at all to be part of her wedding for the

sake of aesthetics.

A child is not your prop.

And yeah, obviously not knowing that kids don't just attend weddings on their own is

daft.

I 100% agree that the kid would be completely ignored once their duty was done.

Someone else said, I would suspect OP's daughter is a beautiful child and this entitled bride

wants the appearance of a picture perfect wedding because all of the possibilities are creepy

or just weird.

Right.

Someone said your daughter is not a prop for her Instagram wedding.

Yeah.

Exactly.

I would hope that that's the reason.

Yeah, yeah.

I would say that it's the aesthetics as well, likely she wants that cutie all moment when

the flower girl comes out and she wants everyone to be amazed at it and it's just like,

you can't get that.

No.

You don't have a kid.

Update.

Let's go.

Let's go.

We are open up.

We're here with the wind.

We're here in the wind.

We have the wind with us.

They say you're in the building.

The wind is going to speak to you now.

Honey.

Honey.

Sorry.

Sorry.

Okay.

Sorry, she's in the wind.

She's in the wind.

In the wind.

In the wind.

So this text message string is from a few months ago and I'm just getting around to

posting the updates.

We got screenshots.

We got those screenshots.

Text messages.

Text messages.

All right.

OP writes.

Unfortunately, we are unavailable at that time sending warm wishes that your wedding is everything

you've dreamed of and wish you both the best in your new life together.

Congratulations.

Classy.

Let's go.

Free.

They write back for real.

Two question marks.

You're busy over a year from now.

Let's say you don't want to do it or are broke.

Just say you don't want to do it or are a brokey LOL.

I was trying to do something nice and include your kid in my day and you can't even be honest

so rude.

I don't know why you're acting like this.

OP writes back.

Come again.

WTF.

I tried to take the high road but you had to push it.

So let's get this straight.

You asked me to dress up my 11 year old child spend time and money to drive her two hours

away to a remote winery and hand her off unsupervised to a group of adults she doesn't

know just so she can perform in your ceremony.

While I check notes, wait alone outside like the hired help.

Let's call it what it is.

What you are asking for is a prop, a glorified insta accessory, not a guest, not an actual

human being.

I declined politely and you accused me of being rude.

What the fuck?

What's rude is treating my child like a decorative accessory, a fucking prop.

If that's not bad enough right there but then you add acting entitled to her presence

without extending even the most basic respect to her parent.

The fact that you don't even see a problem with this is exactly why the answer is no.

Yes.

Seriously, what the fuck are you thinking?

You are completely delusional.

Please stop texting because you can fuck right off.

I won't change my mind.

Oh.

Okay.

My queen.

They continue right.

Reader, I have to confess that the two glasses of Cabernet dragon woke up inside me.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

You are going to have a rant.

Was it my finest moment?

Absolutely not.

Did I say fuck right off?

Near the end?

Yep.

That was me.

Yes.

And I blame the wine and the fucking audacity of well all of it.

On the plus side she never replied and it has been months so I assume the role of unpaid child

actor went to central casting and this episode is closed.

Wow.

Holy shit.

Holy shit.

Wow.

Yeah.

They went to central casting and got someone who is over 18 to play younger.

Yeah.

I am interested.

Wow.

You can get a Russia.

And I will do it.

What in the world?

That's so crazy.

To see actual texts and be like, damn, this isn't fake.

Like, is this?

Yeah.

This someone really did this.

For real?

For real?

For real?

Like just tell me if you're a croquis.

Like, who there's going to be?

So many casting directors at this wedding.

This is an incredible opportunity for your daughter.

Hate that.

Hate that.

Hate that.

Wow.

Okay.

So she sucks.

She's awful.

Yeah.

And we love a woman who's mad after a couple of glasses of wine.

Yes, we do.

Yes, we do.

Cabernet dragon.

Send a link.

Do not talk to any woman after she said two glasses of wine.

You're not going to get.

No.

Just you wait.

No.

You love me when I'm angry.

But you hate me when I'm two glasses of Cabernet dragon.

I hate that.

And that's our speech.

And that's why Brent and Sidney, you guys are the best.

Wow.

Wow.

Wow.

Wow.

Wow.

Wow.

I'll get out of here.

Still better than Ikea, best man.

I'm.

I'm.

I'm.

I'm.

You guys are.

So Brent, when you went to Chile's and you were to the triple-dipper, but you only found.

You found the one.

And then.

But I'll always be there to finish your meals because I love you.

I love it.

I love it too.

I love it too.

You're sitting in the crowd and you're like, okay, yay, I have a wish.

I would pay money to go to a wedding where the bride and groom are giving those types of speeches

to each other that are so atrocious.

Oh, yeah.

Where it's like, babe, you're so freaking hot.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I can't wait to make you pancake.

Yeah.

For sure, babe.

Yeah.

Yeah, babe.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh, it's the best.

Thanks for letting me game.

Yeah.

Okay.

Okay.

We're going to go to Pound Town with you and then play Skyrim.

No, Steve.

She's like, he's like, he's like, oh my god.

All right, we have to go on.

Okay.

We are.

Our next story comes from relationship advice.

He won't dance at our fucking wedding.

I think I've found my deal breaker.

Oh.

It's a 25 year old woman and a 30 year old man.

We've been together five years.

We're engaged, planning a wedding, and he won't dance.

Says he doesn't want to.

He's even pushing for choosing a venue that has no capacity for dancing at all.

What?

Hasn't he been dancing?

No.

Hasn't he danced?

No.

Hasn't he danced?

That doesn't exist.

At our wedding, I know I'm meant to offer a backstory about our relationship, but this

is it.

Our entire relationship in a nutshell, I want to do something because it's important

to me and would take mere minutes of his time, and he won't do it because it's lame

it's slash boring, slash annoying.

He is physically and mentally capable of dancing.

He just doesn't want to.

The same way he doesn't want to do the dishes or cook dinner or clean.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh, wait.

So we're going to back up on that.

So we're getting married.

Yes.

The second he wants to do something, we do it.

No questions asked.

I learned to ski for him.

I put up with his family.

I host parties.

I don't want for people.

I don't like because he wants me to.

And yes, he does dance at those.

I know.

I do all I can to make sure his life is improved by having me in it because I want him to be happy.

And I have asked for one fucking thing to dance with my husband at our wedding over a year

from now.

And he doesn't want to.

And any push for him to do it leads to him saying, I'm pressuring him to do something.

He doesn't want to do.

Despite the rant, I do love him.

He's a good partner and we want the same things.

And we've been together for years and he loves me.

But he won't dance with me at our fucking wedding.

What do I tell him that this is important to me and I need him to do this for me without

making him feel pressured?

And the world pressured to go like this.

We cue back to what we were saying earlier of girls posting their boyfriends and being

like, yeah, so he doesn't clean the dishes and he doesn't respect me.

And then another, like, the second post is, guys, stop leaving hate in the comments.

He's great.

He loves me.

She actually loves me.

She led with that too.

She was like, guys, this is what he's doing and he's done this whole relationship by

the way.

She's like, this is the entire tone of our relationship, by the way.

It doesn't sound like it's been a deal breaker for this person, but it should be.

The wedding is the most important time to show up for your partner, arguably, for a lot

of people it can't be.

So if he can't do this one thing, that he doesn't honor weddings.

She posted this on relationship advice.

And I'm like, what advice are you seeking right now?

Because you give us all this shit and you go, but I do love him and he's actually great.

I'm like, what do you, what response do you want here?

Okay.

I think I've got it.

I think I've got it, actually.

Okay.

It can get tricky when it's in the territory of, like, how much am I changing this person

versus how much are they helping me grow?

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And just because I could see from her standpoint of possibly reasoning her way out of breaking

up with this man, of just thinking like, oh, maybe he is right.

Like I am again, pressuring him or I'm asking him to do something that's uncomfortable.

She has enough evidence, I think, to make the decision of no weight like he's dancing

at other weddings and he's not doing things like household chores that make them on an

equal plane.

So that feels enough to where she should, but maybe that's the gap.

That's where she's struggling is validating herself and feeling confident and separating

from him.

I'm sure he shows up in lots of other ways and she's not just listing that.

I hope so.

So that's probably what like masks over everything?

Yeah, it's hard though.

Like I have to assume there's a bunch that she's not telling us.

Of course.

Because what she's saying is he does all the stuff he wants to do but never wants to do anything

for me.

And I'm like, well, if that's your, she says at the beginning too, that's our relationship

in a nutshell.

And I'm like, so it's bad.

Yeah.

So you're telling us it's not good.

Yeah.

Like, she's being a good partner but he is.

Yeah, he's not there for her.

She's making sacrifices for him but he's not willing to do that.

I also think it's just like knowing that he does dance yet other gatherings and stuff

that are when it's on his terms, it feels like he's making this choice control move.

Like, I will not dance at our wedding because I've been in a relationship where someone

denies me a thing because they know, they almost find it funny that it hurts me so much

that they deny me this one thing that is as simple as dancing out of thing.

And also, I relate to a lot of this.

Like she's like, I learned to ski for him.

I put up with his family.

I hear that and I'm like, oh, so is he not even willing to get to know your family?

And you guys are about to merge families?

Yeah.

I'm obviously like, I have a personal bias in this one so I'm reading into it.

But like, oh, a wedding is, it's an important time.

And like some people get pre-marital counseling to like make sure they're doing the right thing.

Yeah.

So yeah, I think I would suggest that too.

Yeah, I mean, because I think what also she's saying is like, should I make this a deal

breaker?

Could mean a couple of things at once.

It means, should I really hold strong to this and make him choose?

Or is it like, oh, is this the reason that I break up with him?

It's kind of like, it feels like it's both of those things.

Yeah.

That's exactly what I was thinking as well of like, it seems like it's building up.

The wedding is approaching.

And now she's like, now would be a great time for someone to give me permission to get

out of this, if possible, especially because dancing seems to be like, at least dancing

at the wedding, it's something that she's clearly valuing and she's like, well, this

I really, really want.

So now I finally have to ask the question, should I separate?

Yeah.

So it's not about the dancing.

Obviously, dancing is fun and nice, but it's like, it's clearly like, oh, you don't see

how much, when something is important to me, how it should be important to you too.

And like, yeah, I hear you on like, is this my reason, is it okay that this is my reason

to just, to back out?

But it's like, being married and getting married is a big thing.