How To Better Love Those Who Don’t Like Church with Dr. Scot McKnight

During today’s conversation on Back Porch Theology, we’re going to honestly explore how Christians can do better caring about and caring for the precious people who are leaving mainstream churches. It’s a given that some are walking away from communities of faith for sinful reasons but what about the saints who are leaving our sanctuaries because they’ve been deeply betrayed by a spiritual leader or they simply can’t reconcile the Jesus of Scripture – who hugged lepers, welcomed outliers, and compassionately advocated for the poor - with the sociology of the affluent, seemingly inwardly focused congregation they were raised in. Pastor and modern theologian, Dr. A.J. Swoboda made this wise and gracious observation about some who are leaving the church: they have tasted Jesus, and rigid religion has proven to be a poor substitute. Before we go any further, I want to state what I hope is blatantly obvious here at Back Porch Theology and that is: we are passionately, unashamedly, enthusiastically PRO-CHURCH. Dr. Howard pastors a local church in Dillon, CO and Allison and I are life-long church girls. All three of us have spent a good chunk of our lives serving on church staffs or parachurch ministries. We wholeheartedly believe the Christian church is one of the main means of grace our Creator Redeemer uses to accomplish His kingdom purposes. We also believe the Bible is crystal clear regarding how important it is for God’s people to gather on a regular basis as a community of faith for centralized worship, corporate prayer, biblical instruction, water baptism, relational encouragement, and to celebrate the sacrament of communion. But, and this is a big but, we also think Christ-followers can do a much better job of caring for and listening to the men, women and teenagers who are leaving our churches for reasons that should give us pause – mainly, that sometimes our corporate gatherings of faith no longer resemble the Savior we’re singing about or the wholistically redemptive message of the Bible we profess to base our belief system on. Not everyone who walks away from a local church is an angry rebel or a selfish prodigal or a divisive opponent, much less a dangerous heretic. Some sheep are hurt and scared and lonely and they thought they’d get closer to the Good Shepherd if they joined our herd, but unfortunately their wounds have gotten worse, as a result of hanging out with us and they don’t feel like they have any other option except to limp away to a less painful pasture. If someone you love has walked away from church disappointed, disillusioned, and is quite possibly in a season of deconstruction we believe today’s conversation can help you maintain a genuine relationship with them as they sort out what they believe to be true about God, even if they pull away from church for the time being. And based on the some of the excruciatingly honest emails we’ve received here at BPT, we understand that some of you - who purely by the grace of God trust our motley crew enough to hang out on the proverbial porch with us - are nursing fresh wounds from a bad church experience. Please know that you’re especially weighty on our hearts today. We’ve prayed that Holy Spirit will use this conversation to bring you a tangible sense of His comfort. That it will serve to remind you that while Christ followers are notably flawed, Jesus – our incarnate Savior - was without sin, not a man that He could lie or change His mind, according to the Old Testament book of Numbers. Yes, human love is conditional, but God’s love is unconditional and immutable – it doesn’t change. He is not fickle He is perfectly faithful. Although some of you might feel cruelly judged or completely forsaken by a particular church or cadre of Christians, our Creator Redeemer will never leave or forsake His Beloved. According to the Psalms, the God who breathed our universe...