How to Conquer the Anger Impulse + TORCH Fundraiser 2026

It was a risky decision.

Some would say it was even reckless.

It was totally irresponsible.

How can you make such a risky, reckless, irresponsible decision?

Nevertheless, we made the decision.

And so far, thank God, it's worked out.

We made a very risky decision when we decided to only do one annual fundraiser.

We decided to compress an entire year's worth of fundraising into one campaign.

We only do one annual fundraiser at the Torch Center.

And that's happening right now.

In 2026, the fundraiser is happening right now at givetorch.org.

You can find a link in the description of the podcast.

Every donation is doubled.

Every donation is matched.

We didn't always do only one annual fundraiser.

Of course, you know, Torch, we're a nonprofit organization.

The only way we can continue the phenomenal work of Torch in the Torch Center and all the

amazing podcasts and all the amazing rabbis and all the amazing activities here in Houston

and the phenomenal outreach worldwide.

The only way we can do that is with donations.

There are people who believe in our mission, who want to support us, who want to see our mission

of spreading the almighty's name and his toe throughout the world.

They want us to continue and they want to join with us and they want to invest in us

and they want to partner with us.

And we're very appreciative of every single partner.

But we used to do multiple fundraisers a year.

We'd have a dinner.

We'd have all sorts of other fundraisers.

We try to try to meet with donors regularly and ask them for the partnership and their

friendship and support and donations.

And we made a decision.

It may have been reckless.

It may have been risky.

We decided to change our philosophy.

Instead of doing fundraising throughout the year, let's do one big fundraiser.

We'll do it online once a year and hopefully we'll cover the lion's share of our expenses

in one fell swoop.

We made that decision more than 10 years ago and ever since then, every year we have only

one fundraiser.

And 2026 is happening right now.

Givetorch.org every donation is doubled.

Every donation is matched.

With the help of the Almighty and with your generosity over the last 10 years or so, we've

been able to concentrate all of our annual fundraising efforts into one campaign.

And the rest of the time, we can focus on our mission.

To connect Jews and Judaism, to spread the Almighty's Torah, the world over, to blanket the

entire world with the Almighty's Torah.

If you believe what we do, if you enjoy what we do, if you enjoy the podcasts, if you've

listened to some of our shows, the Parjia podcast, Torah 101, This Jewish Life, Ethics,

Mitzvah, History, and all of our other amazing shows from the Torch Center in Houston, Texas.

And you want this empire of Torah to continue, we need you.

We need your help.

We need you today.

Givetorch.org, make a donation, give us your support, give us your vote of confidence.

Givetorch.org, give what you can give, support us, empower us, boost us, fuel the torch.

Our nation, we have a very rich spiritual legacy.

We have a very rich heritage, and we have a very bright, shining destiny.

And it's our job to hold up that torch high and to spread the light of Torah to every corner

of the world.

And here at the Torch Center, we're doing that day in and day out, weep in and weep out

year in and year out.

We realize it's our job, it's our sacred mission to pass the torch to the next generation.

That's our organization, Torch's mission.

And right now, it's the 2026 annual fundraiser, and we need you to help us fuel the torch.

Our rabbis have tremendous dedication to the mission.

They dedicate their lives to this, and we need to support them.

We need your support, we need your partnership, we need your friendship.

We want you to join us at givetorch.org so you can pause on the podcast, and you find

the link.

It's in the description of the show.

You can't miss it and give us support, give us a boost, give us a vote of confidence,

encourage us, support us, be generous with us, help us, ensure that the great work of

Torch continues.

And all the phenomenal podcasts continue, we don't do ads, we don't charge for anything,

we don't try to do membership or membership, I like to say for Torch.

How do we pay for things?

How does the torch stay lit?

We have friends, we have partners, we have people who believe in our mission.

We want to help us, and I want you, to be that person, and what you, to join the club.

And you know what, many of y'all, our club members from last year, I want you to continue

your support.

And you may be feeling right now, you may feel like an urge, welling up within you.

Well, someone else will support, I'm sure they'll have some donors, they don't need

my help this year.

No, no, we need your help.

Yes, your help.

The mission of Torch is too important to take a year off.

And right now, every donation is doubled, it's matched, there's no better time to make

a big investment in Torch.

Many of y'all have never reached out, I got many emails, long time listener, first time

emailer, rabbiwoadjim.com.

A lot of y'all are first time emailers, I want many of y'all, all of y'all who have

it given yet to be first time donors, first time partners.

If you've given the past, thank you, you're an incredible partner that we cherish, we

want your help again this year.

If you haven't given, now's the best time, give Torch.org, give what you can give, and

then you know you're a partner in every single one of our efforts.

There are thousands of people, tens of thousands of people who enjoy the Torah, the rich, powerful,

exceptional Torah that's changing people's lives.

They're benefiting, they're learning, they're studying, they're growing, they're advancing,

they're becoming more educated and informed Jews and believers, and they become more educated

in their Torah because of every donor.

You have an enormous impact because they're people of the world over who are studying

Torah, who are growing, who are developing and deepening their connection with the Almighty,

thanks to the efforts of Torch that you supported.

You can have an incredible impact.

All of those merits accrue to you, the partner, the donor.

It's the best bargain that there is, but there's only one way to have a slice of the action.

Right now, give Torch.org, make a donation, every donation is doubled.

Every donation means you are a partner with us.

If you donate, you're joining our team will give you an email at torchweb.org if you want.

If you donate, you're missing the opportunity.

Isn't that a shame?

It's a terrible shame.

So in short, what's happening?

It's the annual Torch fundraiser of 2026.

What's happening right now?

Where is it happening?

Give Torch.org, G-I-V-E, give, T-O-R-C-H, Torch.org.

You can find the link in the description where you can type it in your browser, givetorch.org.

And if you're still not persuaded, but you're willing maybe to be persuaded, just send me

an email.

Give me your phone number and I will call you up and I will persuade you and you'll make

a donation, givetorch.org, we need your help.

Every donation is doubled, every donation is matched.

It's the only annual fundraiser.

Once this is over, I'll be happy, you'll be happy, and we won't speak about it till like

February or March of 2027.

Isn't that amazing?

Help us get there, giftorch.org.

Buy what just says, rabbi, we'll be at gmail.com.

We all know that anger is not an admirable trait.

When someone gets angry and they start throwing things and they start speaking off and they

get into a fit of rage and they react rashly, they react inappropriately with wrath.

That's not something that we admire.

We admire the people who are calm, who are composed, who control themselves, who don't

descend into a fit of rage.

Of course, anger and rage, it's not something we admire.

When we look at the Torah sources, it's not just that it's not admirable.

The Torah speaks about this trait, the trait of anger with some of the harshest characterizations.

For example, the Talmatel's us that if someone gets angry and you see someone doing things

that are inappropriate to do because of their wrath and their rage, you should view

them like they're a nitolitor because this is the methodology of the it's wrath of

the evinclination.

Today he tells you to do this and tomorrow he tells you to do that and then he tells you

to do idolatry and therefore already once someone exhibits the characteristic of anger

they should be viewed already in your eyes as an idolater.

The Talmatel's us that when someone gets angry, call me nae gehenim shaltimbo, all different

types, different manners of purgatory control him.

The ramban nachmanides in his famous letter, he writes that the worst characteristic of

them all, the worst attribute of them all is anger.

So we see that our sage is viewed anger quite harshly and they say he's like a heretic,

he's like an idolater and that raises a question, why is someone who has a bit of an anger problem

who has a rage problem, who doesn't control themselves when they get a disappointment

that sends him into a tizzy, why is that someone who's like a heretic, why are they

like an idolater?

It's not admirable but we don't necessarily assume that someone who has a rage issue,

has an anger management problem, we don't assume that they reject God so what's the connection.

Secondly, if it's such a contemptible character trait, what does someone do if they have a

weakness for this, if they sometimes get set off by things not going their way, disappointments

mushroom into fits of rage, someone who has that problem and understands that they don't

get what they want and other people view them as being less than what they really are

because of their rage.

And when we see that the Torah views this so harshly, what does someone do if they want

to control themselves, they want to actually overcome this attribute, they want to fix it,

they want to rectify it.

These are the questions I want to pose tonight and I want to answer them based upon an idea

that I heard from my grandfather of bus and memory and it's a solution, a solution for

anger.

You ready?

It's a solution.

So let's talk about the concept of anger, just the mechanism of anger, anyone who's ever

had the experience of a fit of rage, they know that they sort of lose it.

That's the term that we use, they lose it.

There's a feeling of dissociation from oneself and as they just tell us that this is the

definition of what happens, typically, you know, we're in control of ourselves, I want

to make a choice, I make a decision, I can make the decision.

I have a certain, a certain measure of rationality in what I do.

When someone gets into a fit of rage, in the words of Ramchal, their heart is no longer

with them and this person, a person who is in a fit of rage, if they were able to destroy

the entire world, they would do it.

What he's describing is someone going off the rails to such a degree that they're not

making any coherent, any cogent, any measured decisions, they can make decisions that they

wouldn't want to make.

How is it possible that someone could do things that they don't want to do?

It's because they're not in control of themselves.

And the words that he writes, very powerful, it's like they tear their soul a sunder,

that their soul, which is usually kind of the governing body of a person, it's like your

rationality, your thought, if I do this, it's wrong, if I do this, I can, I can end up

in jail, if I start beating up this person who gets, who gets me mad, rationality goes

out to window, their soul is ripped from them.

That's what Ramchal writes.

And someone has anger, their soul gets torn off of them.

And what happens in its stead?

What happens in the void left by the missing soul, so to speak?

See, here's the powerful idea.

Someone gets angry, why did someone get angry?

Well, they're frustrated.

Why?

Because something unexpected happened.

They were planning for something to go a certain way and it was disrupted.

Someone made a choice that they don't like.

Someone did something to them that they weren't expecting, that they weren't anticipating,

that caused them pain, that caused them frustration.

So a lot of people understand the concept of anger as being adjacent to heresy.

The reason is, because if something bad happens to you, if something unfortunate happens

to you, if something frustrating happens to you, if someone does something to you that

you don't like, the man of faith understands that nothing would happen to you unless God

wanted it to happen.

So if someone wrongs you, if someone disappoints you, if someone causes you, triggers you to

go into rage, well, if you truly believe in God, you would know that God is behind it.

But it allowed it to happen.

So if it's from God, why are you so mad?

That's the typical idea as to why anger is associated with faithlessness.

When someone gets hopping mad, they are repudiating God.

But there's a deeper point here that we're learning from Ramhaal.

There's a much more profound point.

There's a representative of God within a person, it's called the soul.

We have a capacity to have a connection with God and to behave in a godly fashion, why?

Because there's almost like a representative, an emissary of God within us.

Anger is the act of removing that representative of God from within us.

That's what it is.

That's definition.

That's why someone's not themselves.

They lose it.

They actually do lose it.

And they pull that part of themselves away temporarily.

And in its stead, in that void, in that vacuum comes something known as the yet-ser-harad.

The evil inclination.

Now, the Talmud, the Talmud says that the evil inclination has a nickname.

It's known as the foreign God.

When you pull the representative of God within you, you pull that away, you remove that,

you withdraw that, you tear that apart.

In that void slides in the yet-ser-harad, the evil inclination.

As a result, you are embracing via your anger, you're embracing an alternative to God.

You're literally saying, I don't want God, I want the foreign God.

I want the usurper, the pretender.

So it's quite literally an act of heresy because by removing that element of godliness from

within that soul, you are replacing that soul with something quite nefarious with the foreign

God, thus anger is in itself an act of heresy.

And of course, someone who unfortunately has had this experience where they've lost it,

they realize afterwards it was not them behaving.

It wasn't them because the balance of who a person really is was altered.

So how do you control this?

How do you manage it?

People say, I've here, learn anger management.

So you can develop the ability to control it.

When you feel a well-ing up of rage, you say, I'm going to control it, I'm going to have

my willpower quell that feeling.

That of course is important because if someone feels rage, it's not quite the same as when

they feel it and they express it.

It's much worse if someone just says, okay, I have this well-ing up, I feel like this

boiling up a vander with me, but I'm going to do nothing about it.

I'm just going to breathe and hopefully it will pass.

That is quite admirable, it's not the same, if they felt anger, sure, but they did nothing

about it, so we could celebrate that.

That's a good thing, that's a victory.

They've controlled themselves, anger management.

And the problem with that is that it won't always work.

Sometimes it'll be successful, sometimes you'll be unsuccessful, and when you're unsuccessful,

you're inviting the eights around the foreign guy within you, and that's an act of heresy.

That's like idolatry in some level, and that we won no part of.

So is there a way to replace the feelings of rage of anger and replace it with something

else, eliminating anger entirely?

Is there a way while there is, and you're going to learn that today?

This is an idea that my grandfather shared, very, very powerful, very powerful, and a

big counterintuitive.

There's a certain framework for anger.

This is an important point, it's a subtle point.

We think of our impulses, our attributes, they're known as midos, amida, good midos,

it's good attributes, good traits, good reactions, bad midos are bad traits, our bad attributes,

bad reactions.

The word midami is a measure, you have a lot or a little, everyone has a different measure.

The rhombum has a different term for the subject of traits, of attributes.

He calls it daos, the word daa means, like something that's in your mind, it's more cognitive.

And the idea is that there's actually, there's a framework that the person who gets angry

has for how to react to a situation that causes anger.

And it might be even possible, if you think of something that makes you angry, you can

actually get angry even when that thing is not present.

Let's say someone has a trigger when they're co-worker, when they're spouse, when they're

personally meet, when they're neighbor, when their child does this, they get angry.

You can actually elicit that same feeling of anger.

You could kind of summon it, even when that trigger is not present.

Why?

Because it's something in your mind.

In your mind, there is a framework for how to react.

There's a system, where your mind has this built-in progression, where if this happens

that I'm supposed to behave in a way like that, there's a way that I'm supposed to behave.

I'm supposed to stream and yell and throw things and so on.

That's the mechanism for how it works, that there's a cognitive component to it as well.

It's a dao as well.

It's a intellectual part.

I was in your brain, there's a system that you say, okay, when if this, then that, if

something which triggers my rage, then I launch it to a fit of rage.

The way to fit anger is to actually change that mechanism.

That's what my ground for the lesson I'm going to be used to say.

Again, one way to do it is to think about how bad anger it is and to realize how futile

it is.

And to realize how bad it is and how you lose your respect, because people lose respect

for someone who has a short temper.

But there's another way to do it.

There's an entirely different and novel framework that a person can adopt.

It's a different perspective on how to deal with disappointment.

The Hebrew word for it is savala-nut, now it's translated poorly as patience.

What it really means is tolerance.

And what my grandfather bus memory proposes is to learn this attribute of what we're going

to call it tolerance, to learn the attribute of tolerance and to replace, to replace maybe

the default settings of if this, then that, if something with triggers anger, then it's

explode in a fit of rage, replace it if something that triggers anger, turn on the attribute

of tolerance.

Now, what does this mean?

Tolerance is a very, it's a very, again, very counterintuitive concept.

Once, firstly, you'll be happy to learn.

It's an attribute that some of the great sages say that it's a number one, it's a number

one attribute of them all.

It is the root of many great qualities.

Everyone's different, every person that you interact with is different.

If you have the great privilege of studying in the Yashiva, you have a Chavrusas study

partner, you have a different way of thinking than they do.

Everyone has different habits and different abilities, people that you work with.

There I say, your spouse, you're just different.

You see things differently, you process things differently.

Your basic assumptions may not be the same.

The ways that you were trained to react to a given situation is very different.

You're just different.

So how is it possible to live a life of harmony with some who's different?

So our instinct is to either get angry or to try relentlessly to have them change, right?

Of course, they need to change.

We're perfect.

They need to change.

There's a different system, it's called tolerance.

It means to accept and to embrace the pain and the discomfort of other people.

In Hebrew the word savvla note means to carry something, it means to bear a burden.

There's an attribute called bearing a burden, something that you're holding on your shoulders

and it's not comfortable and it's not pleasant and it's not ideal.

And that is what you're choosing to do.

It's not to try to avoid the pain and try to fix it, let them fix their characteristics

or to explode with rage, which does nothing productive.

It's to say there is a value for me to have this attribute.

I'm not trying to change someone, but to experience and accept the pain of interacting with

people that are different than me.

And of interacting with situations that are not to my liking.

What is the reaction?

The situation is not to my liking.

By default, it could be anger or rage.

That's the built-in framework that we may have.

Here's a different framework to bear the pain, to tolerate it, not to fix it, to tolerate,

to carry this burden.

The reason why we have an impulse towards anger is because we don't want to have that

pain.

That pain is not a pain that we want.

That pain is something we want to avoid.

The attribute that we're trying to replace that with is the attribute of the grades.

It's the foundation of all or many of the great qualities of the grades.

It's the first thing we've told about Moshe as a leader.

Moshe, when he grew up and he went out to see the plight of his brothers, of his brethren,

and he went there with the intention of suffering alongside them, of bearing their burden.

And the reason why Moshe was the constant leader is because every single one of the 600,000

people that he was overseeing, each one of them was completely different.

Moshe was able to suffer the pain of having to lead so many different people, each one

with their own uniqueness, idiosyncrasies, each centricities, and Michigas, as we say,

in Yiddish.

Everyone's different.

And it's painful.

It's painful to have interaction with someone who's different.

It's painful to have to tolerate someone who's different and situations that are different

than what I would have liked.

And the attribute of Moshe is that all 600,000, he's able to bear all the pain of all of

that, every single one of them.

When it's time to go find a successor for Moshe, we have a very unusual verse.

This is in Parshash Pinchas, in the book of Numbers, the most common verse in the Torah

by the bear Hashem, God spoke to Moshe, laymore to say.

And here's the opposite.

One place in the Torah, by the very Moshe, L Hashem, laymore, God, Moshe spoke to God,

saying, and what the Moshe told God, I'm not going to leave the nation forever, I'm

not going to cross the Jordan.

It's imperative that the nation has leader, that they're not like a shepherdless flock.

But the way Moshe frames that request, led God, the master of all flesh, may God describe

in that fashion, appoint a leader to replace me.

And why was Moshe specifically highlighting this attribute, the God of all flesh?

So Rashi, they're tells us, they say, just tell us, because God knows that every person

is different.

And every person has their own eight central cities and idiosyncrasies.

A point, a leader who can suffer and bear the burden and tolerate the differences of

all of these people, the definition of a leader, both of Moshe and with, and with, and

with Joshua, is someone who is comfortable, bearing the burden and the pain of leading

and interacting with so many different people and so many different situations.

That's the definition.

Definition.

Like, this is a novel to us, because we're used to saying, pain is someone willing to

avoid.

Of course, I want to avoid it.

And therefore, it's outrageous to suggest that when there's pain, you don't avoid it.

You, you carry it.

You don't try to shirk your responsibility and shake it off and try to flee from it.

No, there, there is a value of saying, I am now embracing the pain.

I'm going to tolerate it.

And I'm okay with that.

I'm going to lean into it.

I'm not going to maybe pursue it.

I'm going to lean into it.

And it's uncomfortable and I'm going to carry it.

That's the attribute of Moshe, that's the attribute of Joshua, that's the foundational

attribute of many great qualities.

Of course, it's related to patience.

Patience, we think of patience as just not feeling pain and discomfort of frustration.

This is a, a, a subtler point.

No, it's being comfortable and not reacting violently while we're, or another towards

the phenomenon of being in a frustrating situation.

Without that, someone whose patient doesn't have the pain, someone whose patient is okay

with the pain.

It doesn't react in an inappropriate fashion.

This is the framework to replace the previous framework of anger.

Some of these frustrating, some of these disappointing, some of them different, different

people are always going to cause friction with you.

That's just the nature of the beast.

How do you deal with that?

How do you respond to that?

It's either with anger or it's with tolerance.

And the way to fix it, the way to fix anger, anger which is so destructive, it's so damaging,

it's so devastating, it's like idolatry, it's the worst of all the characteristics, it's

embracing a foreign god, it's heresy adjacent.

The way to do it is to replace it with something else.

A situation that spawns, that triggers anger, can be a situation where the attribute

of tolerance is the way to fix it, is the way to deal with it.

So this is an idea that I wanted to share with you.

I think it's a novel idea and it's a different idea and it's a solution.

It's not just, oh, I have anger and I feel this welling up of anger, but I'm going to

control myself because I know about it.

That's a good thing to do.

That's not to be ignored, that's to be valued.

Controlling yourself, it's always important, but there's a solution here.

There's a way to actually fix it.

It's totally different, a reinvention of how to react to circumstances that trigger anger.

And it's an attribute.

It's called Savlonus or Savlonut and that means to carry something, a carry a burden

that's heavy and it's not comfortable and it's painful and you wouldn't sign up for

it necessarily, but you're going to do it through responsibility.

Now, if you want to try to actually do this, it's important to take small steps.

So we're going to find the lesson remember, used to guide his students by saying, once

you learn this idea, you're going to stand it, you're going to stand what's being suggested

over here and you want to actually try to do it, you got to go in slowly because you're

rewiring your brain.

How do you do it?

You find the 15 most chaotic minutes of your day.

It could be morning, waking up your kids or bedtime or lunchtime or something in the

work day, some time where you're this interaction with lots of people and lots of tense circumstances

that may be under the previous regime would lead to outbursts of anger.

And you say every day, during those 15 minutes, I'm going to think about the fact that there's

another way to react to frustrating situations.

Now with anger, but with tolerance, what does that mean?

It means that there's pain and that's okay.

I'm carrying a burden, it's a heavy burden, I'm carrying it.

If you do that, you're slowly going to develop this alternative way to react to frustration.

And this is maybe the most important thing.

You want to have a good relationship with your spouse?

How do you do it?

They're so different.

And they see the world differently and we have such different ideas.

Reverse tells us tov la gavare tiisa olminu urov.

It's good for a man to bear a burden, to carry a yoke from their youth.

What is this talking about?

So the mirror tells us that this is referring to the yoke of marriage, marriage.

It's like it's supposed to be romantic, we're going to have this wonderful life together.

In the words of scripture, it's a yoke, a yoke is heavy that you place on your shoulders

and you don't let go of it.

That's the definition.

It's the description of the attribute of tolerance.

That's the definition of this relationship, tolerance.

What does that mean?

It means something like that's on your shoulders and it's maybe a bit uncomfortable.

And that's okay.

You're tolerating it.

It's a definition.

People have different expectations of this relationship and that's why there's such disappointment.

And when people find situations that are frustrating to them, many of them say, I want to

state this.

That's what happens all the time.

Or, meaning there's another way to state it, there's a statement where you just sever it,

or you effectively sever it because you have your life and your spouse has their life and

for taxes and maybe thanks, Jiving, you get together.

And that too is a tragedy.

Toritas is not good for men to be alone.

It's not good.

It's so much that you could have, but what's it based on?

What's the foundation of this relationship?

It's tolerating someone who's different than you in every way, in every possible way,

not every possible way.

If it's every possible way, maybe you're not a good match.

But in many ways, you want to raise children.

It's a series of frustrations.

And very often, parenting can lapse into anger.

And parenting done with anger is not going to be successful.

Period end of story.

It's just not going to work.

Words that are said with rage are not accepted.

In fact, a child who sees a parent anger with anger loses respect to that person.

You're supposed to be an adult.

Control yourself.

And you know what?

They're right.

So what do we do?

We learn an idea here.

An idea that's, it's not a simple idea.

And Moshe, Moshe is called the greatest leader and the most humble and rashe defines humility

as someone who's lowly, yes, but also someone who's tolerant.

There's a relationship between humility and tolerance.

You don't necessarily see that.

So there's a very high and lofty level of tolerance, but it's also necessary and the most basic

level as well.

You want to be a productive person, a good spouse, a good parent.

You want to control your anger?

You want to avoid this terrible quality that I say to speak so harshly about?

You have to realize there's a mechanism in your brain.

There's a framework in your brain of how do we act?

We're going to replace that.

We've got to pull that out, pull that default, those default settings and replace it, we're

not eliminating it, we're replacing it.

We're replacing it with tolerance.

And if you want to try doing this, it does take 15 minutes a day as a start where you're

going to be tolerant, where there are situations that are painful, that are frustrating, that

are not to your liking, that are not ideal, that are prone to lead to whether it's expressed

or not, but the feelings of anger, let's say, okay, for these 15 minutes, I'm embracing

it.

I'm tolerating it.

Once you do that, you're on a path towards achieving this wonderful and foundational

quality.

This is step one, there are more steps, and maybe if you want to hear more about this,

you let me know, but some people kind of like the rage, it's cathartic.

I get to scream and exercise my vocal cords and throw things against the wall, and maybe

my subordinates are scared of me, wow, maybe if you like it, if you like it, maybe okay,

there's nothing's wrong, that's great.

But if you want to be someone who is always in control and doesn't lose it and is calm

and composed, even with things are likely to lead them, lead other people towards rage.

Now to be calm and composed doesn't mean to be apathetic, doesn't mean to be callous,

there's a way to be calm and composed because you don't care about anything, no, that's

not what patience means, you do care, and you do feel it, and you're okay with that.

You want to control your rage and almost never have an episode of rage, I'm saying almost

never because the Ramam tells us that a parent or a teacher sometimes has to deploy strategic

anger, sometimes you have to have a display of anger, why, because if a child or a student

needs to be reprimanded, sometimes there is a pedagogical device to put on a facade,

a visage of anger, and it's only surface level, you're giving off the impression of anger,

we're not actually feeling any rage born within you.

The great muster masters used to do this, one of the muster masters had a special set of clothing

that he would done whenever anger was called for, so you would change his clothing,

meaning there's no impulse at all, there's no reaction at all, it's totally measured because

now I know that the right thing for me to do is to display anger, not to feel it to display it,

okay, let me put on my garments for that, let me put on my uniform for that,

that's okay, we're not talking about that type of anger, that's a that's a mitzvah,

that type of anger, where it's not even what you feel, you don't feel any boiling within you,

you don't feel any wellspring of rage, but you're deploying it for a productive end,

you want to control it, the first step is to learn the quality of tolerance, yes it's

important to learn about how to control it, maybe that's for the rest, the other 23 and a quarter

and three-quarters hours of the day, the first step is to learn about this wonderful and new idea,

tolerance, lifting a heavy burden, you're not trying to throw it away,

not trying to discard it, it's painful, it's not coming, yes, okay, well that's what I'm going to do,

that's the first step, you only hear more, I don't know, I don't know if people like the subject,

it's like whoa you're asking me to change, I've done this so many times, this is who I am,

so maybe you don't like it, but if you do, you want to hear more about how to have this mastery

over rage and wrath, maybe some of the higher levels of tolerance, how this is, in fact,

the attribute of motion, you let me know, rad by won't be at jimmy.com, maybe we'll be

so fortunate as to control ourselves, and never tear our souls, a sander, and never lose it,

and never got to forbid being a situation where I say to tell us someone who's angry,

all types of purgatory control them, or someone who gets angry, it's like an idolator,

maybe we'll be so fortunate as to learn this cherished attribute of tolerance, you will hear

more about this, let me know, rad by won't be at jimmy.com,