I Thought Boundaries Were Selfish with Bianca Olthoff

We’re spending the last few weeks of 2025 reviewing our TOP 5 MOST DOWNLOADED episodes! 

Why do so many Christians struggle with boundaries? 

We are taught that boundaries are wrong, sinful, or selfish — and that we should always say YES and be ready to sacrifice and serve at a moment’s notice. 

But is this really the way of Jesus? Or could this lead us down a path of emotional burnout, codependency, and unhealthy relationships? 

Today, we have an on-air counseling session with my friend, Bianca Olthoff. Bianca has been on the podcast before, processing pain from the past (listen here if you missed it!) but today we dive into the topic of BOUNDARIES and learning to protect your heart and calling.

Bianca shares how she lived so many years with low to no boundaries, and the damage that caused in her life and in her relationships. We talk about her childhood, and how the concept of low boundaries began to take root in her life…and followed her into adulthood. 

If boundaries have been a weakness for you, you HAVE TO make time to listen to this episode from start to finish! Setting healthy boundaries is the Jesus way. 

Find out how!

 Extras:

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The Debra Fileta Counselors Network:

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DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She is the bestselling author of eight books including Choosing Marriage, Are You Really OK?, RESET, and Soul Care. Debra is the host of the popular podcast and nationally syndicated radio show Talk To Me where she facilitates on-air authentic counseling-style sessions with notable pastors and leaders. You may also recognize her voice from her appearances on national television and radio, including Better Together, The Kirk Cameron Show, Focus on the Family, The 700 Club, and many others. She reaches millions of people each year with the message of mental, emotional, and relational health. Connect with her on Instagram or at DebraFileta.com.