Jim Curtis: Overcome Insecurities, Step Into Your Possibility and Believe You’re Enough, Finally!

0:00And what if I was the most lovable? What would that look like? When you said that, I felt my whole body shift. Yes. I felt like you can do anything. Everything shifts energetically if that's your focus. You say, what you're seeking isn't missing. It's already within you waiting to be remembered. You are not separate from things. They're not beyond your reach. That your identity creates your reality. And if you want something, you start to align with it. And you say, what are the blocks in front of it? Not how do I go get it? Because it's already there. You have dealt with debilitating health issues and insecurity. You've transformed your life. You've now helped thousands of people transform theirs. You're now dating one of the most famous and beautiful actresses in the world. How have you done this in your life? You transformed your health, your deepest insecurities. How? The hot wall first, I'll say. I started walking with a limb. And we couldn't figure out what it was.

1:00We got MRIs. And I eventually went all over the world just trying to find out what was causing this. Was it a tumor, what's a cancer, was it multiple sclerosis? At one point, I couldn't walk at all. Okay, now that I have this new body, it's created a new identity. Because I'm no longer that kind of kinesthetic, masculine. And so what is the new identity? And so for a long time, the new identity was weak. The new identity was not enough. And I had to say, am I going to settle for this? Jim Curtis. Hello. Nice to see you. Welcome, welcome. Thank you. Whether you're dealing with insecurities, health challenges, or fear, imagine breaking fully free from self-doubt and truly transforming your life. Get ready to release, align, and become with today's guest, Jim Curtis. Jim is a transformational coach and wellness leader dedicated to guiding people through change.

2:05He blends neuroscience and spiritual principles to help you reprogram your patterns and become your best self. With more than 25 years in wellness leadership, hypno coaching process and hypno meditations, Jim has worked with leading entrepreneurs and public figures. His work is deeply personal, shaped by his own journey with chronic illness and childhood trauma and rooted in the belief that no matter what, transformation is always possible. When you have someone who's like, I keep dating, emotionally unavailable, guys. And we have to say, okay, what's the pattern there driving this? And one step deeper is what's the belief underneath that pattern? So for example, it could be unlovable. I truly believe our self-worthers are stealing. I believe that in so many areas, like, we'll sabotage things we don't think we're worthy of. Self-worthers are stealing, isn't that an amazing thing to say? I started to find myself sabotaging myself because I felt as though I wasn't worthy of that level of abundance.

3:09Wow. He's been making headlines everywhere this year for his thought leadership, also for his love life. His brand new book, The Book of Possibility, release, align, and become is a practical and compassionate guide to healing, unlocking the power of your subconscious mind, releasing fear and creating lasting change. He's also making his television hosting debut in his new original interview series called Beyond the Program with Jim Curtis, premiering exclusively on Gaia this October. I am so happy you are here and thank you for being part of the Jamie Kernelima Show podcast family. I'm so excited for today's conversation together. And if you haven't done this yet, can you take two seconds and hit the subscribe button on the app that you're listening on or watching on? That way you'll be the very first to get every inspirational episode. Plus, you can get weekly inspiration into your inbox for me, to you, for free. Just join my newsletter at jameycurrentelima.com.

4:12And thank you so much for sharing this with every single person that you know who might need some inspiration and hope today, because we are all in this one life together. Welcome to Jamie Kernelima Show. Oprah, how have you defied the odds? Her show is unlike any I've ever done. A revelation. When you listen, it feels like a hug. First lady, Michelle Obama. Jamie, you are going so deep. I have never had this in-depth conversation. I've actually never said that out loud to anybody in an interview before. You know how to get there. Your brain and your spirit and your heart is like, Wow, Melinda French Gates. When I look into Jamie's eyes, I feel like I am on some other cosmic level with her. Megan, that's just obsessive. I wasn't expecting that one. I could see the light around her. She's infused with light Maria Shriver.

5:13I never made that mistake again. Imagine overcoming self-doubt, learning to believe in yourself and trust yourself and know you are enough. Welcome to the Jamie Kernelima Show. Jamie Kernelima's her name. Everybody needs Jamie Kernelima in their life. Jamie Kernelima. Jamie, you're so inspiring. Jamie Kernelima. He's traveled here today to join you and me in person. Jim Curtis. Welcome to the Jamie Kernelima Show. Thank you so much. That was very comprehensive. I loved it. Every part of my life, I'm so happy to be here. I'm so happy you're here. And congratulations on the book. The book of possibility. Yes. Tell us about this book for anyone who is tuning in and wants to know, is it for them? What is it about? Transformation is always possible. That's what I believe. And you don't have to be what I call 100% healed to be able to transform.

6:15Mm-hmm. Thank goodness. Right. Right. Like with me. I walk away the limp. Right. But I can still shine light really brightly. So sometimes we start to think, when I get unstuck, when I do something different, when I'm ready. And this book allows you to say that now is the time. And it's often really easy reminders. This is not a complicated book where you're reading line after line after line trying to figure it out. Like some of these books that I studied growing up about Buddhism or anything else. This is a really easy book that speaks to you on a subconscious level. So that your mind naturally starts to release some of these limits that we have around fear, around suffering. And it allows you to step forward. It's a reminder that you are so much bigger than these issues that may be happening. So much bigger than the challenges. And that you can step into transformation every time. This book shows you how. I love that because we're dealing with some of the big things we think like.

7:18It's just us or we're doomed in the future. You say that our subconscious patterns that we all have, right? Are quietly shaping our health. Our relationships, our confidence, our sense of fulfillment. So can you explain this at a really like basic fundamental level? Do we all have subconscious patterns? What are they? How are they impacting our lives? What can we do about them? Yes, at a very easy level. The simplified level is that we learn things. We learn how to be in the world, how to interact with our environment. We learn this from our mind. We interact with our environment. We learn this from our parents and our grandparents and our teachers. And it created a pattern. We can't take all the information in it once. So we create patterns so we know how to react to things. And these patterns often are keeping us safe. And sometimes that safety limits us.

8:19Or we fall into the same familiar patterns because our subconscious mind loves familiarity. Because it's safe. We already may not be serving us in our conscious waking world. Like relationships. We may have the pattern that we go after people that are quite right for us. They don't give us the attention that we need or the love or the support we need. That there are somehow people like to use word toxic. So somehow toxic and we end up upset and unhappy and the relationship breaks up. There is a pattern there that's driving that. And it's in your subconscious mind. It's usually there to protect you. So when I say patterns, we look at those beliefs that are creating patterns that create our identity and that we go out in the world and we create our reality from. So when you have someone who's like, I keep dating emotionally unavailable guys. Right. They tend to think, why do I keep picking wrong? Or why do I keep attracting people that do this to me? But are you saying that this could be, oh, it's actually familiar to us.

9:23And we're doing it without realizing it. And once we recognize, oh, actually, I'm seeking what's familiar. Even though it's not good for me, even though I don't want it when I think about it. But I'm seeking what's familiar. How do we realize that we're doing this? How do we, how do we all realize, oh, wait a minute, is this familiar to me? And that's why I'm doing it. And then what do we do about it? Yes, that's the part. And that's what this book is about. It's about release, aligning, and becoming. So the first part is release. And we have to come aware. And that's taking inventory of our lives. You know, if it's relationships, because that's what we're talking about, or even money, or wealth, or health, you start to say, okay, what have been, what have been the results in my life in the past? Because we have to, like, a business. We look at the results so far. What do we have in our lives? And if we have, like, this really loving relationship, but where it's hard to make the rent, then we have to say, okay, what's the pattern there driving this? And one step deeper is what's the belief underneath that pattern? So, for example, it could be unlovable.

10:23Because something happened in my childhood where mom and dad split up or my parents, or some, you know, I didn't get the attention that I needed from dad. And I was always striving for that, right? And so this belief that says, you know, I'm not worthy of dad's love, follows into a pattern of finding men that are familiar to that. Even though the conscious mind says it's painful and that I don't want it anymore, you're going after that familiar pattern. You create a familiar pattern because you're going after that belief. And then in your life, in your reality, you have a bunch of relationships that don't fulfill you. Why do we go after the familiar? Is it because it keeps us safe because we know what it is? There's so much information coming into us, right? We have this mind that's collating, this particular activating system that's going out and looking for the information that we want based on our beliefs. We can't take it all in at once. So we have an operating system, just like any computer I call it. That's coming down. I want to talk about the soul later. But so the operating system says, I need patterns to make sense of this world,

11:28all this information and who I am. I need to identify an identity so that I can operate within this world and those patterns support the identity and they're familiar and they keep us safe even if they're limiting. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And we can change them. That's the best part, right? I always say, okay, what's the belief driving this pattern? Well, the belief is I'm not good enough or I'm great with love, but I'm bad with money. And that's just where my mother used to say to me, you have champagne, taste, and pure pockets, right? And so I always said, boy, I'm always going to want more than I have. So we say, what is it? And is it true? Where in their heart, if I was to do surgery on your heart, would I find this belief? No. Because it's out here. It's just a piece of information that we've adapted as truth. Mm-hmm. So is there any other truth? Yeah, other people have this. I could have this too. So my truth is not 100%. And therefore, I can start to reprogram based on other truths someone to adapt into the program.

12:31Mm-hmm. So many people think if they change something or get something on the outside, then it's going to fix everything. Like, if I hit my goal weight, if I get a certain number of my bank account, I get married to the love of my life or get this dream job or, you know, whatever it is. 2026, I have, you know, people all have millions of fall, whatever it might be. Right. And you say that real transformation doesn't happen outside of you that it has to happen inside of you, right? By changing your identity, your beliefs, your patterns, your operating from. And this is a lot about what you're talking about in your book is how exactly do you do this? What are the steps? Because I think we've all made that mistake that we think like, okay, well, something's missing or I'm not happier, I'm unfulfilled, but when this thing finally happens, then, like then... If I only moved to California, I'd be happy. Yes. You can't escape your mind. Mm-hmm. You can't escape your heart and your energy. It follows you. So the work starts within. Mm-hmm. And when you start to do that deep work within and sometimes that's, guess what?

13:33Sometimes that's the most difficult work we do. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Like, so that's the hard work, right? That's the hard work because fear comes up. Yeah. And what happens when you want to change the familiar? That's when you hit the most amount of resistance. Mm-hmm. So people that are doing the spiritual work or the self-work or the deep inner transformational work, they say, oh my God, you know, I've been through the toughest patch of my life ever. Right? Everything seems to be crumbling. Even people around me are leaving. And I'm so uncomfortable. I said, yes, because you are pushing outside of the familiar. Mm-hmm. And when you do that, all the alarms go off to say that you're not safe. But when you get to the other side of it, the beauty opens up of what's possible. And so much is, that's the biggest thing to keep in mind is that it's all possible. And I would imagine the alarms go off to everyone else then. They're like, wait a minute. Now they're not, now you're not familiar to them if you're changing and growing too. That's a great way to put it. People around you are like, wait a minute.

14:34Something's not familiar to me. Now that feels unsafe to them. Yes. And you're freeing out when you're growing and transforming. You're different. Yeah. And therefore, what I had an idea of you, that makes me challenge myself. Right? Now I feel different. And if I'm going to stay in my fixed identity, then I have to either ostracize you or remove you or accept you for a limb. And then that means I'll change too. So a lot of people on the spiritual path feel this. All of a sudden they feel a little bit of a spiritual awakening. They open up. They're excited for life. They believe there's something more. They start to stock talking about the potential and the light and the certain memories like, oh no. You've gone off the deep end. What are you talking about manifestation? Yeah. And you know, that's the fact of life. Can you explain energy and frequencies, how what we attract to us reflects our own energy and frequency? I like to say it's physics. And then I had an interview by a woman. She said, I'm not sure that's peer reviewed. And I was like, when you say you have chemistry with someone and you have a chemist there and you say, boy, I have great chemist.

15:39It's not peer reviewed anyway. So sometimes it's a leap of faith to know that when you walk into a room, you can feel something. Right? I've been to meditation retreats when you're meditating. And the whole level of frequency goes up in the room. And you can kind of feel that. So when you tune into your body, you realize that we are all vibrational energy. Right? All the way down to the atom. We are vibrating at a frequency. And you can do the tuning fork tests. We have different vibrations, different hertz, which we're vibrating at. And often as we raise our vibration from guilt and shame, which is a self-loathing, low vibration, to acceptance, joy, excitement, love, which is a high vibration, you step into just something that feels lighter and happier, more magnetic. And it's been proven in the scientific world, and then we make the jump into the spiritual world that this correlates to how we attract things

16:42because frequencies connect and attract each other. You find yourself vibrating at the same level. So, and when you do that, you can start to step into a whole new opportunity to say, Okay, I'm not so separate from that health. I'm not so separate from the abundance that I want. I have to raise my frequency and believe that I'm worthy of it. Yeah, I truly believe our self-worth is our ceiling. Like, I believe that in so many areas. Like, well, sabotage things we don't think we're worthy of. Self-worth is our ceiling. Isn't that an amazing thing to say? And I found it in my life, right? As soon as I, there was a time in my business, where I started making more money than I ever experienced before. And I hit the ceiling, I called the homeostasis. Right? Homeostasis is when our blood pressure, you know, evens out, high blood pressure low, and we're always even. Same with the body temperature, same with when we get too cold,

17:45we shiver, too hot, we sweat. So we're on homeostasis, right? I believe our beliefs are there, too. So when we get to a point where we think we're getting more than we should have, we sabotage ourselves. So I got to this point in my business, where I was like, oh my god, so much money is coming in. And then I started to say, oh, don't take any. Yeah, I don't think we need any more customers, no more clients. This is enough there. And then someone would go against the refund policy. I was just giving their money back. Right? I started to find myself sabotaging myself, because I felt as though I wasn't worthy of that level of abundance. Wow. And so I had to go back and say, what part of me, what program, and at what age was it created? I had a recognize that I was doing that, and then questioned myself. Asked my subconscious mind, subconscious mind, at what age was this pattern in block created? Okay. I recognize I see it something, something tells me, let me explore that, is it still true?

18:46Am I worthy now to do good in the world and to therefore do well myself? And then we start to overcome it with awareness. We release that. We love it. We say, I'm so sorry, that child doesn't need to be safe anymore. We can step into the light. And every change changes. And that's called raising the ceiling of your own homeostasis. And we do a lot of that in the book, and the meditations that come with it. How long ago was that experience for you, where you were? I think it was six years ago. Six years ago. And did you remember what your mom had said? That was part of it. That was part of it. I grew up also in a blue collar family. And it's kind of wealth was for those people. And we were hard working, you know, kind of go out and shovel the snow type of Bostonians. So I realized that, you know what? Wealth and abundance is an energy. I can step into that frequency. And do well while doing well or do great while doing great. Whatever way you want to put it.

19:46This is going to be a big aha moment. I think for a lot of people, because I don't know anyone who hasn't sort of like sabotage something or even has this sort of bad habit. They wish they didn't have. They're always late or they can never quite, you know, whatever it might be. Pay their bills on time. Whatever it might be. And it's really interesting to actually look at it the way you're describing, the way you take everyone through in the book of possibility, which is out now. Grab your coffee. Grab it everywhere, books are sold. And an audible. But you take everyone through how do you do this? And I think it's going to be a big aha moment. Even for someone listening right now who's not into all the spiritual stuff or the, you know what some people call woo woo stuff. But they've got some issues. And if they could figure out how to make their life a whole lot better. Yeah. I think having this fundamental, here's how you do it. Here's how you take it through. Here's when you uncover. Where is that coming from? Yeah. You know, and then you love it and you release it and you step into the light. I think that's going to be a big shift for a lot of people in any area of life. I think you're right. Yeah.

20:46And I work with a lot. You know, there isn't a person that I've worked with no matter how successful, no matter how well known, that isn't having a human experience that feels some blocks. That's what we're here for. This is called the School of Life. It's not always easy. So we're here to overcome these amazing challenges. And you notice I said the overcome these amazing challenges instead of like solve these issues that are crushing me. Overcome these amazing challenges that we get to have so that we can grow into something greater. And if that is, you know, like why, you just have to start questioning everything in the release phase. Why am I late all the time? I know that I don't feel good when I show up late. I know that my friends get upset. It doesn't look good on job interviews. So why is it? Why is it? What part of me does that create some safety? Or is it the block from? Or why is it that every time my relationship is going so well, I start a fight.

21:49Right? Why do I get in a fight? Or every time that I feel as though I need some reassurance in my relationship, meaning I need to know how much they love me, I pull away. And that creates a lot of strife in the relationship because the other person starts to get anxious and somehow we feel safe that way. But it's not allowing us to step into our most loving selves, the most intimacy that we could ever have. And so we start to ask, what is it about me that's doing that? And when we start to ask these questions, everything opens up. Now we add some neuroscience to it, knowing that we create neuroplasticity and new neuro pathways faster by reading, writing and listening, all at the same time, but one issue. So like I said in the book, and this is not all promotion for the book, I hope people get into this expanded mind just from listening to this podcast. But when you start to read something, the information that could give you a na'ha moment, and then you write your own thoughts and experiences about it, right?

22:49You start to ingrain what you want to become as well. And then you listen to something that can move the conception or perception of something. All three of those create a new potential, a new possibility faster. And so whether you believe in the woo-woo of spirit or not, you know, this is proven science in terms of being able to learn quicker. I want to ask everyone right now who's listening or watching this to think about one thing in your life that you're seeking, one thing that you want in your life. Just think about one thing that you want right now. And I want to ask you this because you say what you're seeking isn't missing. It's already within you waiting to be remembered. Is that applied to everything? I think so. Yeah. Well, you say more about that? Yes, right. And so the way that I speak and the way that I write is all to a reminder. And so I used to get these comments. I'd go and speak in front of a big crowd.

23:52Or I'd put out some videos or something. And people would be like, that's, oh, right. That's such a great reminder. And I'd be like, oh, God, I'm doing something wrong. Why have I not had this major breakthrough moment of people like? Oh, they already knew what I was saying. Yeah, they already knew this stuff. And so I realized that there's a place for everything. And my key role is to remind you, to remind you of these things that you have forgotten, that your soul has always known, that your mind, that your subconscious mind is always known, and you may have forgotten. And these reminders are simple. And the reminders are you are not separate from things. They are not beyond your reach, that your identity creates your reality. And if you want something, you start to align with it and you say, what are the blocks in front of it? Not how do I go get it? Because it's already there. There's so much wealth in the world, right?

24:52You experience this. You realize there are some blocks. You start to remove them. Your business flourished. Every time there was a challenge as an entrepreneur, you overcame that challenge. Not thinking that it was not possible, just knowing that, you know, maybe there's some boulders in the way that I need to climb over. And so we realize that this is all available to us, because what we dream of, what we desire, right? That idea and image, if we can think about it, desire, dream it, imagine it, that means that we can create it. That means that it has to exist somewhere. We've dreamed it up. Think about the facts machine. And some guys are like, we're going to send some papers, some information, like, try selling the first facts machine. Try selling the first facts machine. Like, here we go. Someone else somewhere is going to have another one of these, and you're going to be able to send a document over the airwaves and the frequency and the vibrate. And it's like, okay. But he had a dream. Same with a skyscraper. Someone thought about a 50 story building when it built it.

25:54So if you can dream it, you can get it. This is not separate. Anything. You believe that. No matter what, if we can dream it, imagine it. You think in time and space. And this time and space, and this reality we're experiencing as a human, that if we can dream it, we can create it. Yes. Yes. Yes. Now, okay. Perhaps there are some limits on our own consciousness. And then someone who has a health issue that says, you know, you're telling me I can overcome, like, I'm in a wheelchair, and you're telling me I can dream about running. Therefore, I can run. No, not necessarily, but I have to get to the emotion of it. I dream myself about, like, oh, okay, I have dreams about running. And I wake up and I was like, yeah, I feel so good. Like, yes, I remember that feeling of the strength in your body, in your lungs, and being able to run. And someone said to me, do you feel badly that when you wake up and you realize that you can't run? No, absolutely not. It feels great.

26:56And so, I'm not saying that you want to wake up and all of a sudden you'll be healed of your condition or your disease. What I'm saying is that what you really want is the emotion of feeling happy joyful whole. And despite not being able to run, you can still feel happy joyful and whole. That is a huge granular difference right there. Yes. Because you want the thing, and you're like, okay, maybe it's not possible, you could physically run. Right? You're saying right now, you could not physically run. That's correct. And I'm going to ask you about your story. But you're saying why you want the feeling of physically running is you want to feel these emotions. You want to feel happy and joy and strong. But you can actually feel those. Exactly. And you've accomplished what you're hoping to. Right. You want to do some of them maybe saying, Jim, I can imagine myself being a billionaire. Yeah. Right? And we know that there are only a couple hundred billionaires in the world. You're not going to be, you know, perhaps you will be, right? If you can imagine, you go out and do it, right? But why do you want to be a billionaire?

27:56You have to get to the emotion behind it because you want this feeling of safety, abundance, wholeness, excitement, opportunity. Well, you can go out and get those without a billion dollars in the bank. You have dealt with debilitating health issues and insecurity. You've transformed your life. You've now helped thousands of people transform theirs. You're now dating one of the most famous and beautiful actresses in the world. How have you done this in your life? Right? How have you transformed your health, your deepest insecurities and you're sitting here right now, having helped thousands of people, right? Having now done this work for over 25 years and contributed to so many people, living an incredible life in every respect. Yeah. Yeah. What would you say is how? Well, first I'll say, see anything as possible, right? Anything, again, that's why I kind of chalk up to possibility. The other part is I continued to unravel the identity that I had.

29:00And so when I would find an obstacle, I'd say, what's happening and what do I need to change? And so whether that was changing my career from working as an entrepreneur and companies like WebMD and Everyday Health and the Institute for Integrative Nutrition, I felt resistance. I listened to my body when I started to feel sick and I said, something needs to change in my life. And I always had the curiosity and the will to actually take that step beyond fear and to change it. Right? And I also, with health, right? I think it's really important to say, can I shine my light despite it all? Or do I need to be completely, you know, whole, healed and healthy to shine my light? This is big, Jim. Will you just share for a moment, there's me people listening or watching that have read your book yet and they don't know your story yet. Will you just share with them the context of what you have gone through as far as your physical health

30:03and the physical health challenges you've gone through? Because I want everyone to put themselves, it's easy to see you, you know, oh, he has everything right now. But I think what's so powerful is when it's like, oh, but how far have you come? Like how far have you come in your journey? And a lot of people are going to connect to this part of you. Can you share just a little bit because there's so much more in the book that's so well told? But a little bit about your health struggles and what that did to your confidence? And your insecurities? Because we all have insecurities, but some of the ones that you've dealt with, people can only imagine. Right. So I was at 20 years old. I woke up, I was always an athlete. I was going to college on a swimming scholarship. And I was kind of identified as being the strong guy in the room. I was kind of happy and very physical. And at 20 years old, I got into the shower.

31:05I couldn't feel any water on my left foot. And I thought that was very strange. It eventually moved up to my calf and then to my leg and then to my stomach. And I started walking with a limp. And we couldn't figure out what it was. We got MRIs. And I eventually went all over the world just trying to find out what was causing this. Was it a tumor? Was it cancer? Was it multiple sclerosis? It could never really find a cause. But what did happen over the decade is I got incredibly ill. I got in. My pain body was really, really over the top in terms of what I was feeling in my body. And then I started to walk with a limp. And then at one point I couldn't walk at all. And I came back from that through both medicine and what I believe is spirituality.

32:08And I started to say, okay, now that I have this new body, it's created a new identity. Because I'm no longer that kind of kinesthetic, masculine. So what is the new identity? And so for a long time the new identity was weak. The new identity was not enough. And I had to say, am I going to settle for this? And the new identity said, you can't go out and lead people and teach. Even though I was working at these big health and wellness technology companies, because you can't be in front leading people because you're not whole yourself. And how are you going to show someone how to be healthy and happy if you're broken? That was my identity for a decade. And it was based on old stuff from childhood too. And that would get you nowhere. And so I really had to say, what do I want?

33:10How can I align with it? And how can I release that old identity and step into something new? And here's the simple reminder. One, you need to forgive. Forgive yourself first. Forgive yourself for not being enough. Forgive yourself for not being healthy and whole, for not having enough money, for all those things that you're beating yourself up for. It's not true. Just forgive yourself first. And the second thing is, guess what? You're so lovable. So incredibly lovable. Start with you. Love yourself. Because when you can love yourself and accept yourself, everything changes. You don't have to be perfect anymore. Guess what? You are lovable and complete as you are. And everybody makes mistakes. Those mistakes that you make so soon as I say you're lovable and your listeners like, but you don't know this. Guess what? That's lovable too. You can accept it. And from that point of loving forgiveness,

34:14you move on to say, OK, if I no longer have to be afraid and shameful, because I've done these things, I've forgiven myself. And I no longer have to feel as though I am unlovable. I can step in with the question of, what if I was the most lovable? What would be possible for me? And so, OK, well, I'm the most lovable. I can lead people. I can step into new opportunities. I can find love. And then if I'm the most lovable, that means I'm shedding love. I'm sharing love. I'm pushing it out. That energy of love is coming out of my heart. And if I lead in the world like that, what is possible? And the answer to that is everything. And so, how do I get there? Well, forgiveness and love. And that's the steps that you need to take. And there are many ways to kind of eat those vitamins. And we talk about some in the book. But that's the first step.

35:15For the person, for the person who's like, oh, but Jim, you don't know what I did. You don't know how many mistakes I've made. You don't know how many times I've broke promises to myself. You don't even know what I look like in the mirror, naked. You don't know the times I didn't keep my word to someone. You don't know all the failures I've had, whatever it might be, right? All the mistakes I've made. How does that person then forgive themselves and love themselves? What do they do? Okay, the actual part. When we say, okay, let me first do right size. What am I hiding? All those things that I'm hiding, right? You know, they say an AA, I'm only a sicker, it's my secrets. Okay, and then am I the only one hiding this shit? Oh, yeah. Everybody's hiding the same stuff. They're not good enough that I did this wrong. And everybody's made mistakes.

36:15This is a school of life. And what if we were put on this school of life to have these experience so that we could learn and grow into something greater? What if that was our purpose? That we can't get out of this life without having these mistakes and issues? Okay, that's the first rationale that we give to our subconscious and conscious mind. So that we can start to get ready for the change. That I'm not alone in this, that I'm not the only one hiding my shame. And therefore, okay, we're all in this journey together. That means this one, this is, if you take anything away, this is it. That means that I'm not doing it wrong. And if I'm not doing it wrong, that means that I'm doing it exactly right. Oh, even the mistakes, even the stuff that I'm hiding, yeah, you're doing exactly right. Radically accepted. Okay. Now, from this point of doing it exactly right, radically accepting all that stuff, do I want to continue this way?

37:16No, I'd like to have something different. Good. Okay. Now, let's start to write down what we want to be different. And then you start to align with that vision, because sometimes you ask people, what do you want? And someone says, I want to be happy. No, we can need to get very specific. What's going to make you happy? How do you want to be happy? Who are you with? Where are you with? So what do you want? So the first part is releasing, and we use things like the Honopone, Oppone, Oppone, Prayer, which is a really powerful, energetic, vibrational code. It's like stem cells in your body. All you have to say this and the vibration of it will go and start to heal people and experiences in you. The second part is sometimes you have to make amends. Sometimes you have to go to those people and say, you know what? I'm so sorry, I made a mistake. And, you know, I want to have a new relationship. That's making amends. And then you forgive those people that hurt you.

38:16Release their energy. You're no longer going to rent space in my mind. I release you and give that energy back to you. Now you don't have to go and tell them that. You say that to yourself. And the forgiveness isn't for them. It's for you. And then you forgive yourself. And there's also a writing exercises, questions to ask, and things to listen to. We use meditation and what I call hypno meditation, so that we can get into the subconscious mind. Re-experience these things very easily. In a place of peace and relaxation. And start to reframe them. Because the mind remembers stories. And we'll reframe the stories. We can have a new story in our mind. And then we move forward into the aligned peace and then embodying that as we make it our identity with a few steps. Two things. I don't want anyone to miss what you just said. When you go from I'm lovable and you go through the whole process and you forgive yourself, you forgive others. And then you go, and what if I was the most lovable? What would that look like?

39:16When you said that, I felt my whole body shift. Yes. I felt like you can do anything. Like you're whole, everything shifts energetically if that's your focus. And so really quick. When you mentioned the open, open, open prayer. Can you just share briefly for someone who's never heard of that? What it is. And also, can you do that to yourself in the mirror? Oh my God. Yes. And how do you use it? Yes. I use it. So the Honopono, the Honopono Pono Prayer is a Hawaiian prayer. And it was developed by a man, or written by a man, and why that the lore goes. And so the reason why he was the Honopono Pono is that he prayed over inmate's pictures. And one of the most violent institutions, prisons in America. And as he prayed over these inmates, this prayer, it is a vibrational code that the words are,

40:24the words we say are just frequency and vibration. And so the resonance, and it goes into our ears, and then we have an understanding based on our programs, what those words mean. But really, they're just a vibration. And so everything is vibrating. What if the words that we say are actually codes to change the vibration in the reality around us? And so the Honopono prayer is a vibrational code for forgiveness and realignment. And as he prayed over these inmates at the prison. All of them were either downgraded into a less high of security prison. They were moved into a lower security because violent crime went down so much, or they were released. And they never, he never saw them. He got into that vibrational match with them. What I use this for in my life is forgiving myself and others. And I always pictured my inner child was just like healing when I said this prayer.

41:26And it was one of the most profound experiences that I had in my initial journey. Because every time I said it, I would just, I would start to weep, not of sadness, but of release. That I no longer had to carry this burden of shame. And then when I do it with people in the large groups that I do, I always look at the screen or in the crowd tears. And I know it's not sadness. And so it's a powerful vibrational frequency and it goes like this. I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you. And anyone listening, just maybe even close your eyes and just take this in for a minute. I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you. And don't think about anyone. Just allow this to penetrate into your energy and to your heart. I'm sorry. Please forgive me.

42:26Thank you. I love you. And as you repeat that over and over again, you'll start to feel something release, some energetic shift. And then when that shifts, if you are completely lovable, if you are forgiven, what if it all works out better than you ever expected? Then what's possible? So my husband and I, this prayer has been so helpful because there's times where we'll be in some kind of disagreement or some kind of argument or one of us is whatever's going on. And it feels like, you know, is this repairable in this moment? Do we even have time or capacity? But also, we don't want to just stay mad and keep that energy vibration. And one of us will just start this prayer and then we'll both do it to each other. We'll say the four lines to each other. And there's something that shifts and it's like every time. Right? Yeah. It's like, oh, what if this is an illusion, this anger that I'm feeling about this kind of thing that doesn't really exist?

43:30And now all of a sudden, I can shift it just by like stepping into love and acceptance with you and forgiveness. Yeah. And it's like at the, okay, so maybe it didn't change the problem, but at the very least, it changed how you felt about him and the issue in that moment. This isn't that enough. Do you and Jennifer use this at home, like if you have it? We do a lot of meditation. We do a lot of talk. But we don't use this particular prayer we have. Yeah. But it's a very easy. It's really powerful because especially if one person, if someone's so frustrated, and then you actually just look into your partner's eyes and you say these four lines, you almost just can't be mad anymore. You almost just like life's too short and keep them moving. It is true. It's very healing. Yeah. How long have you been with your husband? Oh, my goodness, Jim Curtis. 24 years. 24 years. So I think that at different stages in your relationship, right? The different tools are really beneficial.

44:30Yeah. 24 years, you're like, I know you. And now I also have like, you know, like I'm ready for you. Yeah. And so when you use this, it low is defenses. Right? Yeah. Like, oh, I no longer have to be armored up for you because we're on the same team and I love you. Yeah. And so, you know, Jen and I have been together a year and a half. So this tool isn't, you know, isn't the first tool that we go to. Yeah. What is the first tool of meditation or? Yeah, meditation, acceptance, understanding, you know, kind of those kind of things. And, you know, and a honeymoon phase, like your tools don't have to be like big, slight hammers. Yeah. No, this one is so good. And sometimes when we do it, I'll think to myself, even though you're wrong, and I shouldn't even have to be dealing with this. But then I'll say it. And I'm like, it just puts you in a higher vibration. Yeah. And it does. You know, because even if we don't think we did anything wrong, just saying I'm sorry, which is hard sometimes for people to say that part of it.

45:33But it also feels true at the same time. Yeah. And because maybe you're not only saying to him, you're saying to yourself. Yes. Right? And some people say, if I say I'm sorry, that means I'm not right. And if I'm not right, what does that mean? Often people say that I'm, that means I'm wrong. And if I'm wrong, that means something's definitely wrong. If I'm wrong, then something is definitely not going right. Right? And the question is, you don't have to be right because there's no right. Everybody has different beliefs, different things. Your girlfriend and all of our best friends. My girlfriend. Yeah. Your girlfriend and all of our best friend, Jennifer Aniston, calls you her love. She calls you her love on social media. Can you just update all of us on the status, maybe a relationship right now? It's going really well. My experience of her is so grounded and so open and caring and kind and loving.

46:34And so she uses words like my love or, you know, and she has this group of best friends that are like family. And so I feel incredibly blessed to be part and welcomed into that family. And I feel blessed to be in a relationship with someone that is so open-hearted and kind and loving. Have you felt, have you felt loved and ushered in by all of Jennifer's friends? Yes. Such a beautiful community and group of people. It really speaks to her and them. I mean, that everybody is so grounded, so kind and it's not just to me. Yeah. There's a reason why that whole group and community is so beloved. Everything that kind of, that's all true.

47:37Yeah. If this weren't true, I just wouldn't say anything at all because I would never say anything negative. But it is true. The first time I met Jennifer, I was blown away by how kind she was. You know, just kind and just loving and just like inclusive. Inclusive. Isn't that a beautiful thing. Really a model for how we can all be in this world, right? And she has an opportunity, like you would understand if she was less so. Of course, yeah. Right. I think that she is a real example of stepping into possibility. As she came from, yeah, she came from living in New York and New Jersey. And there was a, you know, into this kind of household name and retained herself. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. This conversation with Jim Curtis is so incredible.

48:38We made it into more than one part. So if you're ready to overcome your insecurities, release fear and step into your most beautiful, powerful version of yourself, you're not going to want to miss this incredible part two conversation with Jim Curtis. That's coming up in the next episode of the Jamie Kernley Macho. Remember this episode's not just for you and me, please share this with every single person that you know because it can impact and change their life too. And if you love today's episode, please click on the follow or subscribe button for the show on the app you're listening to it on or watching the show. And if you could give it a rating or a review, I'd be so grateful. Five stars is always good. And again, please share this with everyone you believe and share it with another person in your life who could benefit from it. Maybe someone you know is stuck or needing a reprogram or needing to release from fear. Maybe they're making a change in their career or their marriage or their health. Please post this episode and share it with others online or in your community who just might need the world to be there.

49:41This might need the words and tools and lessons in this episode today. You never know whose life you're meant to change today by sharing this episode. And thank you so much for joining me today. Before you go, I want to share some words with you that couldn't be more true. You right now, exactly as you are, are enough and fully worthy. You're worthy of your greatest hopes, your wildest dreams, and all the unconditional love in the world. And it's an honor to welcome you to each and every episode of the Jamie Kernelima Show. Here, I hope you'll come as you are and heal where you need blossom, what you choose, journey toward your calling and stay as long as you like because you belong here. You are worthy. You are loved. You are love. And I love you. And I cannot wait to join you on the next episode of the Jamie Kernelima Show. And please note, I'm not a licensed therapist and this podcast is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist or other qualified professional.