Lizzo

0:00Welcome welcome welcome to our expert. I'm Dan Shepherd. I'm joined by a minicom house. Hello. Hello today We have to always an honor to have someone that's a one name Artist that's true. We call that a pretty good to be a one name artist. I think that's called a mononim a mononim That would make sense Today's mononim is Lizzo a four-time Grammy award-winning Emmy award-winning superstar singer songwriter rapper and actor Our albums are because I love you special bitch and our new book which is adorable out tomorrow Calle little Lizzo meet Sasha B. Fluten This was great. It's a wonderful cute little children's book. It really is About her love affair with Sasha B. Fluten. Yeah, it's lovely and Lizzo what a party Really fun. Yeah buckle up. Please enjoy Lizzo We get support from quince You know what I think about a lot the stuff in my closet. I actually wear like not the trendy pieces

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4:07Farm part and safety information we go via clinical study information and restrictions visit for hers.com Baby You're wanting to dance with you for years. Yeah, this is I wish I had more coffee Isn't I would have really we can raincheck it. I would have brought the move the overstands. I see You're what what is that cream top. Oh, that's coffee. We're came aren't You know

5:08I think in Mexico they give the fun to get comfortable. It's a really good coffee shop. Maro. I don't know. I've never had it But it's very good. Did you guys wouldn't you guys get this? I got like 40 minutes ago So it's melted so it's I didn't know high maintenance like I was not prepared. I thought we were both from Detroit. I'm a diva honey I Are from Detroit and in fact, I know we both lived there at the same time Really yeah because I grew up in the suburbs but soon as I graduated high school I moved downtown and you were there because you were a little child Oh, I was a child when you were downtown. Yeah, my hundred years older than that. Oh, that's right. Okay What part of Detroit did you live in? I was the East cider I grew up till I was about nine and then I moved to Houston so my memory of Detroit is more so like family, but I lived off a Chandler park drive I don't know if you know about that. I know these side Do you have any memories of like going down a Detroit River on for the July? We will go to Bel-Au

6:09Bel-Au that's where it's at we would do Bel-Au Bald-Au Park and you would go sledding and then it was horses after that Did you do a family reunion on Bel-Au because that's the move? Yeah, and did you wear matching shirts? We actually do have Kirkwood family reunion Green shirts and we will play volleyball and baseball. Yes. Do you ever go down that insane slide that you go in the Potato sack and get caught? Yes. Wow. Oh, no, so you really You're really true. What up though? And Bella Isle is the most life-affirming Half-square mile in America. What is it apart? So it's a little island in the Detroit River It was a public park and it was pretty good size and you would go on Friday nights in cruise or on Saturday and Sunday it's family reunion time Oh, that's okay. Yeah, and then you got the matching shirts So as you're driving by all the barbecues. It's like orange green yellow Yeah, yeah, and then in the winter They would water down the trees and so it would be like a ice tree and we would like play

7:11And I had the most wild imagination I imagined there was like a family of polar bears in this tree and I would slide in and I would be sitting at like ice tables It's a real memory. I have yeah I just remember it was like one of those big pine trees and it was just frozen solid and we would just run and slide and play On ice. I don't think kids today play with Play with a phone. Yeah, they have a video game where you slide under a frozen tree. I have the best friend That was a willow tree in Detroit Okay, I'm friends off the Chandler Park and Bishop. There was this giant willow tree And it was my best friend and I was sit in the willow tree and talk to the willow tree And I would use the leaves of the willow tree. Wow, I was a kid. I didn't know no better I would pluck them off and use them as a tail and I would pretend I was tails from Sonic and And then one day They drew a line across the tree and I was like what does this mean and my mom told me she was real She was like they're gonna cut it down and I was like why and they're like it's blocking They told us that it was like a hazard and robbers were like hiding underneath it. So the city couldn't find them in the helicopter Oh my Detroit got them city

8:13So I was like no, I'm not gonna let them do this So I was gonna stand in front of the tree and be like if you're gonna cut this tree down you have to cut me down And my mom was like you can do that but first you gotta go to school honey No, I know what happened next. I was For weeks I was inconsolable. That was my best and only for a giving tree Are you able to read the giving tree without getting hysterical fun fact that book is about me Yeah No, it's not the opposite because the little boy and that is a dick. Yeah, he's a tree Okay, I'm gonna make a prediction Okay, I guarantee I know that there was one night of the year that you were not allowed to go outside after dark and that's October 30th Yeah, devil's not baby That was so crazy. I remember that's not a thing anywhere No, but growing up there you think everyone in the country's got bevels night And then yeah when I moved out here. I've never met anyone that's the

9:14Texas is a open carry state so I was like surely they'll be driving around shooting Or not so we're 30 torching things but absolutely not but also I was a kid in Detroit So Halloween even was a little dicey because it was like oh that was when I was putting razor blades in the chocolate Oh, which by the way is that true? No, it's not true. It's an urban legend I learned this in a class at UCLA There's never been a razor blade in a piece of candy ever The only time there's ever been poison or something naughty and candy is a parent putting it in the candy of their own child But there's never been a stranger There's just doling out poisonous or razor blade Okay, so how did this happen right because I feel like back in a day before like social media There were just commonly known urban legends. That was our social media But that just means that social media is it's something deeper. It's something real We had an expert on on these at one point. There is a math to them There's something about the details are sticky so like they went through like 10 that almost everyone had

10:15It's like there's this famous one about a girl who goes on spring break and she meets a boy She has sex with him unprotected and then when she's gonna fly home He gives her a present and he says don't open the present until you're on the airplane Do you know the punchline of this one? Is this ring about she gets on the airplane? She unwraps the box and inside is a miniature coffin And when she opens it up there's a piece of paper that says welcome to the wonderful world of AIDS Okay I think maybe because y'all were super little during the fight of the AIDS thing But and when I was in high school coming up on spring break that was being circulated my school like listen This happened to a girl two years ago on spring break in cancun So don't fuck around and the expert was like it's these details the little coffin That stay with you. I mean it's stranger date. It's like there to protect you. I guess but it's all made up Did you know the one about the needles in the chair?

11:16Yes, and I still look yeah You just never know what could be in there I agree So with you on this now what about the myth about okay now I don't know if this is a myth but our public toilet seats Can you catch something anything any type of illness or sickness or disease from a Public toilet if you're a married man and you mysteriously end up with HPV. Yes What do you mean all this shit was made up by married folks to explain why they got a STD somewhere They were saying there's a lot you can get herpes from a hot tub. Wait, so you can't No, you can't I'm not gonna get it Well, you're gonna rub the inside of your vagina on the seat You think your blood cheeks are gonna pick up some Most of these STDs die when they're airborne STDs, but what about like um you can get some fecal matter on your butt cheeks Yeah, but that's not a good right Yeah, but again, you're gonna have to explain how it gets from your blood cheek then you move it somehow internally I don't think it wants to ride in if they've experienced this. Yeah, well, it's gonna be a married person

12:20This is true. Some people get in the hot tub naked. Yeah, and then it can and then they have sacks The heat kills it, but again, it's in 102 degree chlorinated water. Good point Now the other one that I was most fascinated by and by the way had I never transferred schools This would have never occurred to me But I went to an elementary then a junior high then transfer districts to another junior high and then went to a different High school out of a different district, right? And every one of these schools had the exact same three rumors about the kids they didn't like So there was the girl who got hot dog stuck in her vagina Yep, I knew that one you have that the boy who got his dick caught in the pop bottle or a vacuum And I would go to these school and they'd be like you know Brad got it And I'm like no, there was a kid Trevor my old school. They said that about there's no way both kids did this We don't know because you kind of believe the hot dog one about the girl in your school She was a friend of a friend I went to like a black country kind of high school So I feel like our stuff was like there was a girl

13:20Giving blow jobs in the annex bathroom and a long line But I don't know if that's like a urban legend or like Probably happy that definitely happy. Yeah, we had a girl under the bleach No more power to her, but yeah, she's okay. I really hope she's okay My god She's when you think about like being in high school when I was in high school I really thought I was grown I really thought I knew everything but now I think about high schoolers Fuck I think about 20 rows. I'm like there babies. I know they don't know anything protect the babies. Yeah, oh no The girl who gave a blowjob under the bleachers in my middle school Was in sixth grade Jesus and it felt fine It literally like oh, it's happening You're doing stuff and now I'm like that's Delta's age That makes me want to die. Yeah, don't bring her into it, but yeah No, you start doing like wait yo same fifth and sixth grade And I was like out like you think back now and you're like oh my god my heart She was poor babies. Yeah, a couple different girls left my eighth grade because they were pregnant. Oh, I had sex in the middle school. Oh

14:27I just saw a shade of your eyes No, I'm gonna sluts shame you well, not know your eyes between you You go what? Also, what are we talking about? The show's called urban legends by me and a cabive and an ad Except you should have listened before you came I'm a handry honey. Okay, so what did mom and dad do in Detroit? They had Multiple businesses the most prominent business where I was born. I knew was a credit card business So they sold credit cards my parents have always owned businesses together as long as I've known them You know before I was born they probably had jobs and stuff and work for people But they've never worked for anyone since I was a kid and I have memories of passing out flyers to this credit card company On the weekends and putting them underneath car windshield wipers and making it fun with my brother and sister like a race I couldn't get rid of their flyers first. So yeah, that's what they did. They're very collaborative. We're the siblings older or younger Older I'm the baby. I'm the mature baby tall Sister short the oldest is the runt, you know the little one is upside down

15:32So why did they move to Houston when you were nine? I always say for the mortgage business. Okay Uh-huh the mortgage business. Was there some heat on everyone? Listen, you know what it's like you have to evacuate Detroit Leave Detroit casually you have to like flee and I remember one day I was like in Detroit and then the next day I was in Houston my mom was like Hey, we're gonna move to Houston. I was like no and then I blinked and we were there So it happened damn near overnight Not a lot of that's why I'm asking was maybe there's some heat maybe we're these credit cards some of them or maybe a little But I'll say my dad was a very infamous person. You either love to him or you wanted to kill him. Okay. Okay big personality Yes, Libra okay. Yeah, what does that mean Monica? Well, my girl Yeah, good at lying charming good at lying. Yeah, you might be arising. Yeah What's look he might be it gives that or maybe little Pisces are airies a little bit rising. That's my rising. Oh Nice. Yeah, okay, scary. Oh

16:35I have a double Virgo otherwise so I'm good. Yeah, I love about you guys who like astrology Is like no matter what you all like astrology and believe in it no matter what it is you guys are equally pumped That's what's neat about it. It's like there's no strat of what's good and bad. It's just yeah You're a Pisces. Oh great and you're a Capricorn. Oh because it's good to know I think you can tell who really is into the charting of it all and who's just like early horoscopes kind of yeah And do astrology because they'll be like oh Oh, that's because you have a very basic understanding of the signs But all the signs are great because we're made up of all of them. We're made up of the stars You know, it's really that and I think we really nerd out because we like I'm speaking for you But yeah, I like sailor moon. It's an anime. I thought it was one of those gurus who knows a lot about Does it it sound like an astrologist's name sailor moon sailor moon that is a fire name Yeah sailor moon like as an astrology account If Nile could take a Gucci will let me have the name sailor moon

17:38They're not gonna come after you on Instagram Is locked in that IP is Barbie deep. They probably already on the handle on Instagram the sailor moon handles take it We haven't looked but we're feel pretty confident in this take Master sailor moon. There's something there though We like it wait. I know all your things. So you had you had corn roll click. Oh, you know my music things got you Yeah, where girl always three hours girl three hours. Yeah, I spelled it a lot today. So I'm like is it two hours or four I know it's very So was this sailor moon sailor moon girl Girl Get the You guys now call on it We have a lot of witnesses Yes, M O O O we can try Yeah, I think that's a little heavy handed Then it's like sailor moon dresses a cow and actually I was going to be sailor moon for Halloween

18:38I was gonna be a cow dress to sailor Here will leave here today with something Thank you so much. Yeah, okay, so you land down in Houston and do you remember that being a Overwhelming transition or did you take to it? Of course, I've read little iso and Sasha be fluten. Yeah, so I know that version of the story, but what was your overall? Did you feel fish out of water? Yes, I think that it was a culture shock because I was like I don't want to see horses in the road just to the cars I was very dramatic and I did see horses and was like oh shit like hey, so that was big But also my entire family is in Detroit and my church was my whole family like versus In Houston there are mega churches where it's just a congregation of the people from the city Also by the way the pastor is flying in on a helicopter coming down preaching getting back in the helicopter flying to his other mega church so he can spread the word quicker exactly, but our church the main room was the size of this was their music in that church

19:44Yes, the choir my cousins and aunties the band are my cousins the pastor is my uncle It's all my family. It scares me. I say this all the time I'm not religious and in fact religion scares me a bit But I do fear it's decline because like yeah, we just had a Anderson pack on he learned to play drums at the church Yes Where are all those kids in the decline of that like where are they gonna get the music education? scares me a little bit. That's what I'm worried about so I don't even think there can be Another Whitney Houston or anyone close to her because church is so formative you're born with the gift Of course, but in church you kind of learn how to release your inhibitions There's something about catching the spirit and there's something about a Holy Ghost and there's something about church music That allows you to express yourself in an unhibited way and that's what Whitney brought to secular stages She brought the church to the club Yeah, you're also already in community which is already a heightened state

20:46And then you add on music which also is a heightened state and it kind of can reach a level That otherwise it's and everyone's rooting for you in the church like no one's at church like there's no haters at church That's bad because it's not like not about somebody calling me Oh, you can answer it. No, it's my driveway. Can we keep this case? Speaking of sailor moon. No, I didn't know why your person's so big and now I do Because what other person with that phone fit in Wow, this is from sailor moon. It's her crescent wands So she's like you really make up and then the powers come out of it and she turns into sailor moon Yeah, but I also hate touching phones. It burns my fingertips. Sorry. Yes I know about me. I'm sensitive We were talking about something church People are rooting for you people rooting for you because it's not about that. It's about God. Yeah, so we're singing for God We're using our talents and our gifts for God and I think that's the difference. There's a humility in it

21:48Yes, because when you think about pop music and in the pop space most singers are singing for the coin They're singing for the check. They're singing for the glory The cloud the approval because they have to but when you see a person who was anointed and who is singing for a higher purpose It just hits differently. I don't see it anymore. It's declining at a rapid rate So in Houston what church should you end up at one of the megas? We ended up at a mega Uh-huh did the pastor ever ever scandal while you were there? Because what did they also like to do with the private jets is they also like to get a little trouble in the sheets That seems pretty awkward. I went to a few churches. I'm not gonna name names because we don't want but I went to a few megas But I will name what I went to Lakewood for a while I remember when pastor Joe's father had passed away because he was the head of Lakewood And I remember when he passed away. There was a huge billboard It was like we're gonna miss you and then Joe begrudgingly took over all. Yes. Be grudging. He was like the young Cool PK. Oh my god, but I remember he took over and it just started going great

22:51He bought the Charlotte Hornet Stadium, right? That's Joel Stene. Well, he bought the arena that I know about yeah This dude owns arenas yeah, and then moved the church into that arena And I was like oh, they big ball and now I was driving by him on the highway Just let me see what it's all about and I checked it out. So I did a lot of church Hopping but my family. I think they were very turned off our first year there We went to church and it was a mega church and it was New Year's Eve Actually, I remember we went to church and you know, we pray into the new year There was a lot of issues. I feel like my family was very uncomfortable, but it's a weird story There was a huge power outage at midnight and everything shut down and my dad was like a very superstitious kind of person And he had already been feeling weird and when that happened he was like I don't want to do this anymore Like that was a sign that we shouldn't be going to these churches So my family stopped going to church when I was very young all together Only one who continued to pursue church and congregation and eventually with my best friend I found a church and it was very small and we would go together and it was so small that like

23:54We would have to move locations He would rent out buildings and sometimes they wouldn't make rent so we would move to another building But wherever we were we would always come together It would be the same congregation we would sing and we would play and and it was very very grass roots And I loved it because I was hanging out with my best friends on the weekend But I also loved it because it gave me a place to be sacred. I crave that. Yeah I think it's important and so how did you do with the other kids in the school? You said they were country. Were you in a rural area? Maybe I was in the swat I was in the south-west A leaf Texas Which is southwest of Houston So this is Houston and the H as we like to say and then there's the north side south side West Side Katie and then there's East side which we don't really go over there because that's basically Louisiana And I was down here in the swat okay So it's all the greater Houston area But we was in the swat down here mind you 30 years prior it was all cows in the area. Okay, so there's still fields down highway six There's just fields old plantations

24:56Yeah Plantations Very much that and so when we moved into our neighborhood we were the second house I remember when the neighborhood was being built in our house was being kind of put up It was all grass and then it developed really quickly and it became real country urban the culture moved very quickly My sister older than me we went to same high school Elsaq was very kind of artsy by the time I got there it was the trap Like it's up four years for it to be the trap. It was fun though. I love high school middle school is where it was rough You was out here Cracking and shit that was my funny enough Monica's born 87 you were born in 88 42788 and And that is my peak year of my entire life and I've had a charm life But seventh grade is the best year of my whole life. It went all downhill in high school. What happened in high school? Okay, so in eighth grade I was five 11 160

25:58And ninth grade I was six three one fifty so I lost ten pounds grew four inches this nose came in But this all didn't come in so it's just a huge nose terrible hairdo My brother had me get a perm and it was long and bad with a perm up top huge nose acne rake figure It just was a bummer brand new school. What's wrong with being tall? It's okay if you're tall unless you're 150 and six three that's not enough weight on that frame You feel me yeah, I was real bean pulley. Oh, so they were calling you bean pole and shit well I fought so they don't want to be You were fighting them. Yeah, I fought yeah, man body shaming goes both ways No, nobody likes what they got period. Yeah, but also if somebody's mean enough They'll find a way to make fun of you. Oh, of course if you would have talked about my nose. I was devastated right or my act or I remember Was my shoes there would be like oh slouchy shoes your shoes slouch It also that means nothing. What does that mean? What's a slouchy shoe? I don't even know. I'll have wide feet

27:02So my shoes were kind of slouch on the sides and it's like back in I You don't even know I used to bind my feet I found out like Cambodian women like find their feet in middle squals binding my feet with tape So that my shoes went slouch on my air forces was they crispy on the side because if I had a little slouch on the edge of my air forces Somebody would see it and it be the end of the world you're binding for with those gals were binding for length generally Yeah, okay, they're binding all around they're trying to have the tiniest times Oh, they had you seen those x-rays. It's all I did was fuck my feet. Oh, of course I had with the call in her own toenails Okay, I have no arch Actually, I'm realize that's probably why heels hurt so bad now No, I think they hurt everybody Trying to not be slouchy girl, but middle school was I think the worst you know in Detroit Black people we have what's called the Detroit proper So if you talk to my cousins, it's like what are y'all doing today? How's everybody doing?

28:02God bless you ain't me ain't me, but in Houston Everyone's very country and if you don't talk very country and you talk proper you talk white So I was getting the white girl. I liked anime. I wasn't wearing my hair like the other girls Cambodian feet You talking about Cambodian feet Oh my goodness my interests were just different. Yeah Japanese interests. Yeah And this was before liking anime was cool because now liking anime is just so standard. Yeah. Thank you for L For all made it cool, but like before that it was like why do you like that weird stuff? I didn't conform. I didn't shave my legs because my mom and my sister they don't shave their legs So I didn't learn how to shave my legs and I still to this day Don't really need to shave my legs, but the girls were like your legs are hairy. Why don't you shave your legs? You're weird and I'm like why are y'all just finding anything to say about me? So most of my bullying was middle school. That was the brunt of it But it was also the height of my delusion So I didn't really notice because I was in a fantasy world. Yes me too

29:03Like I couldn't find my clothes after gym one day and I was like Hmm my clothes just disappeared no girl They took your clothes and threw it on top of the locker So you wouldn't find it so you'd be walking around the old gym clothes all day So you were saved by your obliviousness oblivious that's the word because I'm oblivious to this day I can't pick up on certain signals. I'd be like wow. How did that get past me? That can be a blessing. Yeah, it might be a lot of It might learn it might not be something you just are your brain might be protecting you You might also call it disassociation Stay tuned for more armchair expert If you dare we are supported by all state Checking all state first could save you hundreds on car insurance Not checking whether someone is actually waving at you before waving back You saw the wave you went big and then they walked right past you to greet the person behind you Yeah, checking first is an excellent plan So check all state first for an auto quote. It could save you hundreds

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31:04Plus it has a ton of other features. I didn't even know about like did you know premium automatically downloads videos from channels you subscribe to So even when I forget my content is still right there for me So if you're like me and you already like youtube you're going to love youtube premium try it now for two months free trial eligibility varies terms apply cancel anytime This episode is brought to you by service now Look, I have my dream job. I get to talk to folks. I admire like crazy and ask them Virtually any question that I want to I can't imagine a better way to spend my time But even dream jobs have some not so dreamy parts the stuff that gets in the way of the actual work Now that's where service now's AI specialists come in They don't just tell you what you should do about your busy work. They actually do it start to finish cases closed Requests handled no extra work for you So you and your team can focus on what matters most which for me is are they obsessed with male bodies on the same level as I am

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33:12Well luck if it's removing stains while keeping an amul intact let's go They also have different kinds they have the advanced white they have peroxy care Which is my personal favorite they have complete care and they have fair a breath So you'll find the one that's right for you. It's also the number one Dennis recommended baking soda toothpaste So it's not just us saying this try arm and hammer toothpaste to taste the difference feel the difference arm and hammer baking soda toothpaste simple powerful claim I Will raise my hand in class and I raised my hand a lot to the point where like the teacher would ignore me I was the only one raising my hand and I remember at one point when I would raise my hand in class There you go, damn and everyone will start laughing I was like, oh, we're laughing with me like You almost making fun of me. I kept raising my hand So I did have a little bit of obliviousness with the teasing but when I look back on it I was like, oh, no, it was really coming for me on the other end of the spectrum

34:12There was the very obvious like somebody called me fat ass every day, you know, it's like what's up? Fedass I had teachers kind of make fun of me too because I have really sweaty hair y'all well he's in the beat down Humidity yeah, and I was sometimes at the walk to school in humidity because I wasn't far My brother and sister my sister has very very long Curly mind you this is a weave but really long curly Alicia keys like hair right so she would always just wake up Wet her hair and scrunch it in some moves my brother very same. So he would just scrunch it with some moves I'm the last baby. So they would tell me to scrunch my hair with some moves It did not look like that my hair's way more coarse way more fine way more kinky I got like an actual afro so I will wake up in the morning wet my hair and scrunch it with some moves and look a hot ass mess And I will put my hair in these little Uncombed wet ass ponytails and I will go to school and be like Oh This is so embarrassing and I'm putting myself all the way out there. It was not mad at okay But it would mildo okay

35:14Because I was sweating my hair And it's humid yeah school and my hair was wet all day in the bun. Oh, no, it's in a bun Yeah, she had to keep it wasn't itchy, but it was just a wet ass mildo-yass bun. It was a wow wet ass bun But I had to like learn real quick in middle school like my hair is not like my brother and sisters My hair's not like my mother and father's my mom had really long hair touching her butt my dad had a ponytail Rico swab, and we did I'm the only one with an afro so I'm like I have to learn how to jazz it up and I did I got my first weave the last day of eighth grade And I remember I was walking through and it was the last day of middle school because we were going to all the high school And they were like oh Melissa Like everybody was gagged. I remember I had this little chocolate brown weave that I glued in myself And my mom helped me glue it and then flipped out the ends like this I had a little fair of false and I was like yes, and it was very sandy in Greece like

36:16Yeah, and they were like wow she's actually pretty Wow, she actually looks nice when she does her hair And so I took that energy and went from Melissa to Lizzo And so it's a big reset for high school. Yeah, you were shaving your legs. You had your hair right? Yes, she's my legs for no reason by the way Just to fit in and have a hair just to fit in and we stopped buying inner feet and I We stopped binding okay, we started getting wider shoes I think I switched from air forces to what's the one the strap the re-buck Adidas? No, no, no What's the one that philos? Oh Because I had no rounder situation I was like I'm in the philos like y'all know about this. You don't know nothing about this I was you were you were bringing it back to run DMC exactly. That's what they wore Philos is that what they were? They did have my yeah, I see you wrong They switched to philos anyways in the fact that yeah, we'll do it for the fact Okay, so you start playing the flute at 10 years old. Yeah fifth grade fifth grade and you play all the way through to

37:20You go to college, but even before that at 14 you formed the corn row click from Oakley How many of you three there was four of us okay? And you were wrapping I was wrapping so flute and wrap happened in simultaneously Fluphers wrap second and then you went to university of Houston go kooks To major in music performance and flute okay And you did what three years there I did about one and a half years before I chickened out it didn't correlate with your father dying um Yes, they were very close together though. Yeah, no, it was same time okay same time yeah That would explain it But it was like I dropped out and then he passed around the same time it was like a year before he passed I dropped out and what can I ask what he died of that's a great question. I don't know how old was he I think he was like 53 Yeah, wait to he was a baby like when I think about a nom like oh my god. Oh, yeah, that's in five seconds He had had strokes

38:20hypertension. Yeah, yeah, hypertension. He had congestive heart failure But like was always trying to like manage that and honestly he was like doing better and I was actually shocked So it was quite subtle you didn't have any sense that was coming And were you guys close? Mm-hmm. I would consider myself a daddy's girl you dedicated the book to him. I did He told me that I was gonna be a great flute player before I even thought I would be a great He was like super into the flute and mind you this is somebody who Was very strict on his kids because he wanted us all to be very successful my brother He was like you have to do football my brother's like six five like in high school and he was like no You're gonna play football in my sister He's like you're gonna do this and they kind of rebelled my sister my brother wanted to do more arts my brother He can draw he's like super talented and my sister is extremely talented in music and arts And they wanted to do that and I Wanted to do this flute thing which is music and arts and I was like sure he wasn't gonna fuck with it But he was like no, this is great do this do this do this and am I wrong real quick? I can name like

39:25Seven great Jazz sex role players. I can probably name like eight great trumpet players even clarinet I can't think of a real famous flutus right? You know black people. We don't say Chris Martin. We say co-play So he would always say you gotta be like jethra tall okay I thought his name was Just a band yeah, that's common though. His name is Ian Anderson But my dad would always be like you gonna be like jethra tall So yeah, I think that was a big part of it because A there was a huge gap for what I provided. Oh, I just realized why you're saying jethra tall a heavy flute in jethra Yeah, the He's the flute play Yeah, and my dad would be like you gonna be like jethra tall I did not I thought there was a black man because jethra is a black ass. Yeah, especially down in Houston So I said oh jethra I'm gonna be like jethra on them like so I will always say that I just got a book of Ian Anderson Flutelos and I'm like oh, that's his name Ray Only kind of contemporary flute Personal start that we knew of because everything else there was the classical side that I was super into like Sir James

40:29Goway is my hero so there was that side but you think about yo yo ma besides sir James where is the yo yo ma of Flute now where you're going on late night shows and shit. Yeah. Yeah. I can't think of a super famous. Yeah Flutist is it floutist flutist? Yeah, my whole life I grew up it was floutist. Yeah literally Recently, I'm telling you right after college. It was like it's actually flutist. I think that's a Mandela effect I think it switched from floutists to flutists. Yeah, because I remember us being like no, no, no, it's floutist correcting people Yeah, and now it's flutist Okay, tomato tomato flutist flutist Hello floutist sounds better. It sounds more fancy. I'm gonna say I'm a floutist. Yeah, like wanting to like shares some DNA with Flonte There's a little bit of a round if I was in a group of flute players I would say flutist because I would be afraid to be looked down upon sure Okay, well, they need to look up to you, but yes, but then talking to the layperson you might say floutist Yeah, I'm a girl. Yeah, I'm a girl like a non-music reading

41:33Individual yeah, well that Harry Potter punch through everything. God, it got everyone in it It's universal happened. Oh, just my reference. Yeah I think I'm very y'all's age you love Harry Potter. It had no borders Someone asked me recently. Why do you like Harry Potter so much? But it was such a young person asking a millennial and I was like, oh my god This is like a moniker of what our generation what was your answer? Because it's to me quite obvious He did ask me because we went to the Harry Potter universe's studio We were eating the Harry Potter food and I was like well because I read the books and I was like and I was present When the movies were coming out and it was like a really big deal and he was like So when did the books come out and he was looking up the year and I was like He went 1997 I was like look at that. I was like, it's say the 1900s. No literally. I was like no It was like 2005 like that's one the last book. Yeah, I was in line for the last book I was also in line at the Barnes and Noble Yes, or like sometimes you pre-order and but you have to get in line

42:34But I think part of it's because our generation We were their age. Yes, give or take a couple years But the main characters were our age so we were growing up with them Yeah, y'all the reason it was so successful is the same reason that you love goodwill hunting Any story about someone who's normal in average and finds out they're incredibly special Is the most wish fulfillment even normal? They're down trodden right? It's like He's getting shit on by that terrible family lives with and then you find out No, I am special. I kind of had a hunch out special and we all feel that way We all think like I think I'm special. Why doesn't anyone see it? So this book is about someone seeing how special you are And then getting to go with the other special folks and we also want to find our tribe So it's like it's also I feel like every story has that assistant or relic story But I don't think you know, I think you could go. It's the magic But that's just the fun stuff But the real human stuff is like hey, I'm really special. Why doesn't anyone see that?

43:37Like if you want a successful children's story start with child who doesn't feel special Give them Purpose makes them feel special and then add your own magic. Yeah, I think that's the true story of childhood and growing up Yeah, and by the way, we all deserve to feel special and be seen as special, but it doesn't happen And the more relatable your hero is the more you can see yourself in it And that's why I wrote Lil'Azomi Sasha be floating. Yes, even the kids we thought didn't feel that way Felt that way. Yeah, you know, even the kids that were in the cool click There were four kids cooler than them and they couldn't figure out why it what you know It's kind of a universal human We all just think everyone knows what's going on feels like they've got it figured out But no one does those kids like the cool kids who are fortunate to be cool and feel special at that age I think eventually though they have to learn how to find their special that's not external validation Mm-hmm. Oh, because you're so hot or because you're just so effortlessly cool. You're just the guy

44:41They have to figure that out later in life. I was a nerd. So I didn't have that at the reverse Yeah, I think that can be harder in some ways when you've lived a whole life with other people telling you something And then you're like who am I? Yes, okay, so back to college was there a specific thing that had you leave? Yeah, pressure college was wow when you are a music major You got to wake up at the ass crack of dawn and you're actually extremely independent you wake up at the ass crack And you all have like a big recital that you have to complete midterm and at the end of the year And so every day you have to log hours in the rehearsal room Which is this scary little room by yourself because there's all these rehearsal rooms But they're pretty thick because they're like foam booths. Yeah, cuz you don't want to bleed the sound everyone's rehearsing So I'm in this room and this old-ass building which I know was haunted. I hate ISO booths now when I record music like I don't go into the booth Like I record in the control room with everyone else with a microphone Yeah, because when I go in those rooms, I'm like

45:42So I'm just realizing that's what that's from you weren't even pumped about the size of this room Too small you coming in I'm cool. You like a big space. No, she said the church was this size. Yeah Okay, okay, okay, it wasn't a pejoria. It's not the size When you guys done nothing I think you've done a great job The hidden cameras are nice. Yeah meta ain't got nothing on y'all. Yes Anyways, you're waking up. You're hitting the marching band field at like seven in the morning It's one band one sound then you break and then you have to go and you gotta find a practice room You got to log hours you got a rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal then you have to go to like regular fucking school And that's the part that really pissed me off because I felt like I was in fame and I was like I'm waking up and I'm doing music. This is the thing. I'm an independent woman And then you have to like go to math in English and I'm like, why don't I do one this again? Yeah I did this for 18 years. You needed to go to a conservatory That was the plan after the U of H I was gonna go to the Paris conservatory because that's all I wanted to do and I was kind of getting Exhausted of that because then it was like of course the conservatory was great

46:46But then I'm also a jazzy black girl with friends I went to college with close friends and so there was parties and I was wrapping with them And I was in a rap crew the nightlife and then waking up at seven in the morning And it was like wanting to be in a sorority and then waking up at seven in the morning I felt like I was getting pulled and I was really really stressed out about it It was really stressful to me That was like one of the hardest times in my life. I feel like I just kind of gave up And then so you had the shame of quitting probably right? Yeah, you did regrets about that or not No good. Well worked out But I bet for a year didn't feel like for a few years Yeah, gave away my one shot at making a living at this Yes for a few years because if I had had any other kind of degree if I was pursuing like Doctor or nurse seeing or teaching Maybe to this day I'd have regrets because I'm like it'd be nice to have that But I was pursuing music performance and flute and now I'm performing music and flute So I really honestly think I deserve my doctorate. Yeah I'm sure if you get this speech they'll give it to you

47:48I played with the National Symphony Orchestra last month. Have they not invited you to give a commencement speech? I would love to do that University of Houston get your shit together Get her down there Give her a doctorate Okay, why Minneapolis like if I'm you and I'm thinking about moving somewhere to pursue music I guess I'm probably thinking LA, New York Atlanta. Hello outside of prints Why are we going to Minneapolis which I wasn't even aware of I didn't know he lived there It's a really funny story. I was in the indie side of things So I wasn't on the industry like if I wanted to be an industry girl Maybe I would have moved to New York or LA But I was in a rock band at that time and I had been going back and forth with this producer Via zoom and I was like writing with him and he lived in Denver and I was still in this rock band And I was like man Working with this guy's pretty cool and he was like hey, I'm gonna move to Minneapolis He was like you want to come with me and be in my band. I was like manyapolis

48:50I didn't really think anything of Minneapolis back then as far as like music because I was in my own Houston bubble I went to South by Southwest that year which is a music festival in Austin, Texas and every fucking person I met was from Minneapolis. Oh really every band that performed every rapper I was worried from and they're like Minneapolis And I would like link up with them and we'd run around at party and have like the best time And they were like boofing vodka up their ass and like Eating Molly off the floor. I was just crazy time I was like sleeping in my car and then they all like slept in the car with me because that was the only But we didn't have a hotel room. I was like these people are fun And I was like you know what I will move to Minneapolis because I had already made a bunch of friends at this festival And I was like I'll just link up with them when I get to the Twin Cities And I did and I still had my hesitation and then I played a show there and it was like our first show Oh my god, the varsity club we played the varsity club anyone knows Minneapolis knows And I remember I performed and afterwards someone came up to me. It was a girl

49:51And I remember she was like do you live here? And I was like no and she was like you need to live here. We need someone like you. Oh wow And I was like easy And I was like you know gotta tell me twice I was like wow I felt so appreciated and loved in that community But you know they love on their artists. They love on their local artists They have such a rich local music scene especially when I was there I felt like there was something in the lake water man There was rhyme sayers so there was atmosphere and doom tree and you could sell out every venue in the city With just local acts all in one night and we would like bike and run over to the different venue I don't know what it is about the Twin Cities but it's not just the music scene It's the restaurant culture too the mom and pop shops the family owned restaurants There's so much love and support in that way It seems like it's kinder than some of these other big cities Yeah and it's got like a Portland kind of feel where like they really just give into community I think it's super super community based

50:53There's nothing like it So you got big there There was You got big like you had songs I was so confused by that That were big there and they wrote about you there And you kind of were a queen there I feel like that's a great place to learn how to do all this I felt very appreciated I also feel like I wasn't anomaly because I was this black girl raised in Kojik church Who could freestyle rap like a heustonian or like Mike Jones And I was up in the Twin Cities just this anomaly of a person But I could also jam in rock bands and I played the flute Yeah and they were just like who the fuck are you? Yeah They're so weird and I wasn't like 12 bands You know I played flute with my friend who was a rapper I was in this noise bands I was in two girl groups I was in an electro pop band I was in so many bands y'all And I would pop up on stage and collaborate with the other rappers I was doing anything for free How did you end up recording with Prince?

51:55I was on my second girl group That was fun those were the days But our group was featured in a documentary That was on NPR, the current And they were highlighting girl groups And so it was us and then Prince also had a girl group Third-I girl And so we were all in this documentary And then I remember we got a call from the radio station It was just like hey Somebody wants to work with you We were like Who the rest was history Wait so Prince is using the radio station to book his stuff That's how we found us By the way the current is An incredible station It's the NPR Station there and just be loving it When you heard your song on the current for the first time It was a big deal like we would pull up And we were all in the car together And the first time they played our song We turned the volume up and we were like screaming It's like being on morning It comes eclectic back in the day What is that? That was the L.A.NPR Morning becomes eclectic The Garden State soundtrack Was the current running soundtrack Of morning becomes eclectic

52:56When that movie came out And the guy who would curate all those songs Has now done a lot of music supervision And shows and movies Because he says impeccable taste And it was where you would go discover the coolest new bands That would become these huge bands So I'm imagining it's the same thing as the current Way You're knowing it now Hold on Your Garden State Am I tripping? No but people think I am I literally That was so natural I almost passed out Wait this is my turn No my doppelganger is Zach Braff I am not Zach Braff I was sitting my brain was sitting with you Yeah you started getting scared like I was like no I got the wrong guy Podcast Have I been on this entire time No this is great This happens all the He gets asked to take pictures all the time As me and vice versa and we just do it And those names have this Zach, Zach, yeah Yeah, white boys with big noses The red ass names That just really fucked me up You zoned out Yeah Zoned out again Anyways, have you seen Scrubs?

53:59Let's change subjects Have you seen Scrubs? Look at that, she's really fucking cute Zach Braff Okay I'm parenthood And without a paddle He's punked I know you are But for a second I thought I didn't I said oh shit that was confusing No you fucked me over Intentionally All right Rewind That was wonderful You asked You didn't say like oh yeah I love your movie Oh yeah I can't put my wrap But if you rewatch this tape You will see No the look on your face was very genuine You got really scared about time's face You were like where am I in the universe right now I'm gonna keep you up Down Oh my god I'll be shit Okay Let's really hear that Anyways, we're back those So I don't know, check it out Is a new season Yeah, we brought it back Anywho Stop Okay 2013 first solo album Lizzo Bangers This is the one that got really big In Minneapolis In particular, right Yes, I was able to sell out First Avenue And the song batches and cookies

55:00That one was getting played on like BBC Radio This whole Minneapolis chapter is really fucking cool Because I don't know if you went to New York If you ever gotten all this encouragement And like started fortifying your confidence Or if you'd gone to LA If you'd gone to Atlanta Like I think there's a special accident that happened That you go to South by you end up there And then you're loved there Yeah And you kind of learned to be loved You got to learn to be loved, no You do have to learn to be loved And I also feel like I'd never felt like I really belonged Anywhere fully as an artist Because when I was in my rap cruise I was still writing pop music And then I also was listening to rock And then when I was in my rock band I still wanted to shake ass and freestyle rap And then gospel music don't let you do none of that And flute really don't let you do none of that And then I got to Minneapolis And for some of my reason All of it was okay Prince is the finger print of the city And Prince is doing crazy guitar solos On an R&B song In the 80s

56:01He's going to a Bob Seeker concert And go, why is that guy in arenas? Oh he does ballads I'm gonna do ballads He's a neat, you know, malgam of all these things And so I think the vibe is like very embracing Of something that's a little left to center or Of on guard So it's like a beautiful place Yes For you to learn to do this Well like weird was okay Yeah Yeah right And I was like, oh my god it's okay to be weird I would say that all the time I just feel like Minneapolis The people there Are so supportive of black people I just felt Loved and appreciated for who I was And I wasn't caught white girl I was actually the blackest person in the room with that Well you kind of country like me? Yeah This white girl Yeah Country I'm hood Oh wow that's a first for me That's a first for Elmo So Wow But yeah now I loved my time It was magical At that time when you were kind of a big thing in Minneapolis Did you ever think like Yeah this is good like this would be enough Absolutely Yeah Oh my god Like you made it

57:02Making it I hate to be that person is like No not actually making it I hate those people But I have to be very clear about When you're a big deal in Minneapolis It's not Cloudy or fame like Literally it's like Oh I could play this show And I can pay my bills really well I can tour And make money And I can give money to my mom I can help my people out And if my people need to come stay with me They can come stay with me And I can eat wherever I want And the nicest restaurant in Minneapolis No that's it Boom you did it I can fly wherever I want What a nice flight You're nice virgin First class Yeah Sometimes It was really that Do you have a nice car then? Do you care about cars? Hold on give me a second I did not drive For a long time Slowly rose How the fuck did I get around Yeah How the fuck did I get around him many after They have buses or a train? I can't believe I'm sitting back and realizing I don't know how I got around Because I stopped driving Because I had a little Little do you like it?

58:02My license was not do you like it? Okay, sorry That's a very common reason to lose your license You know I never know do you like Nothing like that But you know She was the HPD they like to fuck with me And my license was basically hot For like a decade Okay My license got unhot When I moved to LA Finally I say Can we figure it out? Yeah like let me hire a lawyer to figure this out So I go to the DMV I'm scared to go to the DMV I don't know if that's an experience for you all But I have a fear that if I go to the DMV I'm going to get arrested and put into prison Because I know that can happen to people That's how you get got Or they'll be like Hey everything's fine You might just stepping out of the vehicle for a second Everything's fine Yeah Fucking yeah So anyway Shit was hot for a while So boom right I'm like okay finally have enough money to pay off Whatever this weird thing is Why I can't get my license was holding my license up I pay it off My shit's still hot I was like Chessed out by the finally get a license I walk up to the beach like oh no sorry You can't get one my job scared

59:03I'm like I'm thinking Why you as Marshall's They're like no you just can't so There were two Melissa Jefferson's Oh Two Driver's licenses out there With my face and my name And they both had a record Oh my god Your ID and started having a good time on the highway I'm to this day don't know What's what It's him It was you I was like this is the reason I had to do something I imagine the gas Because he's like That's right So I finally paid that one off And now I can drive So I did not have a car I did not drive him anyapolis I wrote in the back of people's cars You know what many apples I love you so much I wrote in the back seat of people's cars I slept on people's couches I slept on people's Floors and futons and guest rooms I ate meals at y'all cooked I ate free Poutine for playing shows Drink free beer for playing shows That city really did take care of me Paps Blue Ribbon PBR

1:00:03Huge in the North Peeber That's right This out too Is it I think it's just big Yeah when you're driving I've driven a motorcycle Cross the northern part of the country And when you're going through Wisconsin People can have a bar in their house Like the liquor license very And everyone has a Paps Blue Ribbon sign Hanging off their porch And in Minnesota we get a bit of that too You do get a little bit of PBR up Yeah, yeah And then there's Tacate down south Tacate, Lone Star Beer Right Beer I don't think people fucking will be here no more In the south they're still They're going to breweries and stuff I was just there You was at a brewery I was about to say Some wrong with people who go to breweries But I don't want to judge I don't mean to judge but You don't need to judge It's like why do you want to taste nasty after nasty after nasty I don't like beer but my friends still like it Who are there I carbonated piss It doesn't taste good We're having our first dust up Because you're wrong Beer is delicious It's been with us for millennia He does have a beer come so shit Like I'm like There's two things a little bit of oil for a walk

1:01:03I feel That's a fail I'm sorry That's a good car I'm sorry I'm sorry But beer's delicious is a crazy statement Okay Beer's never been delicious The only time beer's delicious is a crispy A concurrency blue moon With orange juice I do like it So I guess you do like it With orange juice You got to sweeten it up a little bit Orange slice also fights I will squeeze the orange You're healing it But you don't actually need tropical can A dump in there You just want the orange slice I need that orange flavor You want all the citrus pop I can do that I can do all those citrus pop a little sweetness Sure A little sweetness Would they call it a color item or most of Oh that's what it is Okay And you'll fuck with that I'll fuck with that Okay good I want to talk about some important Okay okay come on So in 2014 In the wake of LizoBangers Which was like very well reviewed And you're kind of really getting some traction And some momentum You do this interview for style like use What's underneath Yes Yeah And in this interview While talking about your body You start taking your clothes off Which then leads to my skin

1:02:05And I do wonder When you look back on your life Don't you think it was some of these Decisions that kind of came out of nowhere Literally put you on a trajectory And then you wonder like Wow if I hadn't done that Magazine Maybe I end up there But how much longer Or how much later would it have been I have a very auspicious life I think touristses do though I think we are like The forest gump of the zodiac Okay But like I think about all these things So I just taught a self-love class on Twitch And Somebody asked me How did you learn all this shit About self-love And I was like my heart was broken in a million pieces And I just started desperately clinging To books and crystals and candles And prayer and Then I discovered self-love And my desperation To love people without conditions And then I started writing all these songs about self-love And now I'm the self-love guru And now I'm teaching the self-love class on Twitch It was like this weird full circle thing Where like when I go back to 2016 Clutching of fucking rose courts And a black termally in my apartment As about as big as this space

1:03:06I love using this space as a reference I can't tell you what it is It's a reference point I would have never imagined The life that I have now Or needing that moment to have the life that I have now It felt so Impassing Or not important Just like the style like you When I got that interview I didn't even realize I was under prepared for the interview Because I didn't know what it was That's when I was just doing press and j- I was just doing shit I was like whatever I was kind of rolling up hungover To things Not in like a dark kind of way But I would party a lot And I'll be like what what are we doing today What are we talking about today And they're like you know you have to remove articles Of clothing and I was like I don't have that many Pieces of clothing on to remove That's part of the interview Yeah I got to go out my wig Yes part of the interview So it's called what's underneath So you're slowly taking things off of the As you question so a lot of people come with layers on Oh yeah Because they're prepared The people that know where they're going Come in layers Yeah I'm over there I literally have to take my wig off Because I had nothing else to take off

1:04:07Boring you with these Anderson Packseries But another Anderson Packing that's crazy Is he thought of the idea I want to play Tiny Desk You want to fuck Anderson Packing? So bad He really does Dude I think he is Prince I think he's our Prince No he's fire He is unreal That smile Oh my god It's in toxic cake He can't not smile He said he can't get his teeth in his mouth Like he is a permanent smile I know right Cause you know you can trick yourself into being happy Yes And he's done it But he had the idea of I want to do Tiny Desk And then he got fucked up And he woke up in New York And he's hung over And he doesn't want to go And he tries to get out of it And they basically force him to do it And as you know that's the biggest Tiny Desk ever And then to find him People are like Oh he plays the drums in his face Crazy So yeah it's that same weird thing Or it's like you almost missed it My Tiny Desk is also very underrated Okay So anyone listening just go watch my University of Houston Get her to do the commencement speech Go watch Tiny Desk Watch Scrubs new season now Now

1:05:07There's a new season for real For real they relaunched it And it's actually very good Yeah Stay tuned for more armchair expert If you dare This episode is brought to you by SoFi The Everything app for smarter money Award winning banking Investing borrowing and more Get it all in one place And get every dollar working Get started with SoFi checking and savings Earn up to 3.8% APY for up to six months Pay no account fees And a cash bonus up to $400 when you sign up With eligible direct deposit Terms apply SoFi bank and a member FDIC When you're ready to invest or deal with that debt It's all right there SoFi members can talk to actual financial planners Through SoFi wealth Which helps when you have no idea what to do next Get started at sofi.com slash armchair SoFi Get your money right This is a paid advertisement by SoFi Technologies And it's not intended to be financial advice

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1:07:09Why isn't big girl small world unspotted fire apple Damn I was trying to listen to that today and I couldn't find it Every time I get alive Somebody go I want to listen to human eyes I want to listen to human eyes Humanizes a music video that's the one line That's from that album So you can listen to that It's very Bjork Well me trying to be Bjork If you want to know the unsexy answer Oh my god this is I'm Who fucking cares it's over now already won the Grammys So to be eligible for the Grammys I had to take down Previous works Oh Why Because best new artist That's new You could only have a certain amount of submissions Or whatever Or not even submissions but bodies of workout Because I never submitted for the Grammys before that But bodies of work And I had so many bodies of work out That they were counting them as albums Or I don't even know if it was albums Songs out in the world So I had to take down a shit ton of songs To be eligible for best new artist If you then put them back up they would take it back I didn't even win it so

1:08:09Oh okay I'm good Okay You know I think Billy Eilish won actually Which much deserved Because I had been out for like a thousand years But I say all that to say I changed the rules Because now the Grammys came out and said Hey now you can have Ex amount it doesn't matter You have to only have a certain amount of like Well-known pieces To be eligible for best new artists So that's why Apple gave me the Rule Breaker award Because that's not the only rule I broke Songs that came out three years ago Never went number one on the Billboard charts Like that just was unheard of I was telling Monica that good as hell No it's truth hurts Oh truth hurts Good as hell as well That had been out for a minute That came out in 2007 And I said to Monica Can you imagine having good as hell And for a couple years you're like I don't know why is it this fucking song And then it comes out on another album And I was in it is fucking to the Strathater But mine was the major writer was like top 10 Bill Gates Yeah it hurts Number one Billboard Yeah what is it like to have those songs That you must feel in your soul Are worthy of that

1:09:10Later confirmed But in the period before it's confirmed Are you going like Well y'all I don't know what else to do Well here's the gag Well first off One thing about me I don't care if I flop Or have the biggest song in the world I'm a songwriter And a performer So I'm always going to be okay There's more where that comes from I'm like I'll write one I got something in me And I do think that there's a sort of scarcity Mindset What a lot of people because they're given songs And when you're not hot anymore And you flop They won't give you the hot songs anymore So you're in trouble But because I'm a songwriter And all these songs I wrote myself I know that All I have to do is keep going and being myself You know so back then when that happened I wasn't thinking like Why isn't this number one Why isn't I was like once in a while I was honestly first off I thought where the hell my phone was going to change my life When I wrote where the hell my phone What do you know I'm like Y'all I'm scared Y'all just get her Nicki Minaj

1:10:11You're like Everyone needs to get a hold of my ego Okay everyone pay attention Keep me in check I know I was back to bed I was just Shit In the world that we go with it all vaguely Nothing happened to this day with that song You know good as hell Truth hurts I loved them I believed in them I thought they were incredible But I'd never known any greater success Than they had hit So I just kept moving forward And they were all step-ups anyways Yeah truth hurts was devastating for a lot of reasons So truth hurts was devastating Because I was like Yo This song is actually really good I love this video And I felt like a lot of people went dark on me Who was supposed to support me at that time And it kind of broke me down And I was like Oh I quit music And then they were like hey don't do that And I was like All right I'm just gonna make music And just talk to my fans And not worry about nobody else Not worry about no grimmies No number one It's nothing bigger than what I got I think that's actually incredibly good advice For anyone that's artistic to hear I had two different people that helped me One time I had written a sketch While I was doing sketch comedy at the Grandlings

1:11:13And then I saw almost the identical sketch On Sorry Night Live And some of the folks that were at the show Were writers on Sorry Night Live And so I got all spun out You know I'm living in a fucking one bedroom apartment I've not made any money About the size of this room It's a big deal to me And I remember talking to someone Kind of higher up than me at the Grandlings And saying like Too to a fuck And this person said If you think that's the only great sketch You're gonna write Then you should go get a lawyer And so If you think you are an endless Well of great sketches Then keep a movement And I heard that somehow I don't know how I'm pretty bullheaded But I heard that And yeah I think it's just like If you're an artist Just keep fucking Keep going Be a volcano man Yeah and now you look at The biggest artists in the world Are people who have been out for a long time Putting out music consistently for years And not getting the appreciation they deserve And then all of a sudden one day Just popping the fuck off Yeah yeah yeah Thank you to the internet Thank you to TikTok Thank you to the fans Who like consume it So just keep fucking going

1:12:14Use it Oh my god I use so much emotion I use anger I didn't wait to hear the song That comes out of this interview I'm so sorry Oh my god all the anger I thought he was Zach Braff Zach Zach The tension between those Zach The song should be called Zach Zach the accent Zach Zach And Zach Zach It's so low on the nose It's uh It's like clunky It's more clunky No nose There's no sound It's not the songwriter I don't get it You signed in 16 to Atlantic Good as hell comes out 2019 you're in ugly dolls And you're in hustlers Also first movie You're in makes $160 million It's crazy it doesn't happen anybody Wait really Yeah It made $160 million That was a big movie You know guys I never really I don't really Cause it's not your thing You weren't setting up to be an actor If your life was acting You would damn well know I didn't really appreciate the music Shit either bro

1:13:15Oh really I was performing at the AMAs and stuff And I was just kind of breezing through everything Cause of this obliviousness Or as a self-protection It might be a combination of both I really didn't smell the roses a lot I just started Appreciating and smelling the roses lately But for the most part I'm like I had all that going for me I even realized You feel like you missed it I did miss that Because that particular Part of my career is never gonna happen again Right The discovery and the rise That's never gonna happen again And it's scarier to be the person Who's already famous and built in Because there's one way to go People want to bring you down As a part of your career Yeah I survived that part Yeah It's Phoenix time And then once you're Phoenix You're good Okay Yeah, you gotta That's true Yeah, you take the big beat down And then if you Phoenix Then you're kind of Impenetrable Oh but I now feel like a mama bear For other artists I see When they start blowing up I'm like oh my gosh It's coming Yeah I'm gonna see survived I hope they make it Yeah At the peak of that

1:14:15Once you start Touring In 2022 was special You've hosted us and now it's like You're really at that peak Kind of Everyone in the world is Singing to you dancing you Watching you on TV Didn't even really realize it Downing down to you really I mean that's what was happening You know But I know that's too much You're not a god Come feet I want to know how you do on those tours That are really really long Of course we lots of doc love the doc Do you get lonely? They're their waves Are you happy? Then you're sad I don't like to describe this Being on stage In front of 20,000 people Who came to see you Who love you very intensely Who got babysitters to see you I know Oh my gosh They don't even get me started on that part Like the sacrifices Yeah you know But the energy That they're giving you Imagine every person You love All in one room Screaming Affirming you And I love you

1:15:15Yeah It is the most incredible feeling And then you're not up there Doing something you don't like I'm up there singing songs That make me feel good And I love my music Yeah So we're doing this together And it's this incredible high And there's these lights And then you go and you sit Afterwards There's a massive come down Just chemically I think there's why so many performers are addicts Because The only way to sustain that moment on stage Once you're alone back in your room is to get fucked up Yeah I'm not calling you an addict But I'm saying I think that's why so many are addicts I probably had an addiction to food or something Okay You're gonna have something you regulate Yeah And then I would just get very moody And like sad Until it was time to get back on stage again And then it was awesome But I love touring Like I love performing And now I'm a way more balanced person That touring for that long You're kind of raggedy Like I was pretty raggedy I know it looks so glamorous being

1:16:17Glittery and diamondy And made up When singing songs It's just the wear and tear of travel Anybody who goes on vacation Knows that when you're done at vacation Even though you had a ball You got to recover Yeah From the vacation Because this travel is taxing on the human body So you're into planes You into trains You into automobiles You into buses Time changes You're going faster And the human body should go Way too often While I'm going as fast And of pressure Fucking tube in the sky And then you're in the next city And then you're Oh Every fiber in your body You give to people And back then We were doing a radio promo Because I don't think they really do that Post-COVID I don't think Meet and greets and all of that But it's like Radio station Meet and greets You got your real life meet and greets Of your fans who came to the show You got your sound check parties You have your press You have your promo Post show You got to talk to The suits and the ties Yeah, you got sponsors So much interaction And energy and talking and connecting I'm really good at that

1:17:17I love that shit But the human body only has so much And so I'd be really tired But I would feel like I'm not allowed to admit that I'm tired I'm in a very privileged position Well, you feel you'll be ungrateful If you acknowledge that Yes Which is the great crime and sin of people Who aren't eternally grateful If they've made it Which is not possible for a human To feel eternally grateful The human version of me Is like, oh, I need a day off You need a day off from your dream job Exactly That's great No one's going to feel bad That you're tired on a world tour I didn't even feel bad for myself Yeah, right It gets yourself together Right Get up, girl, get up Yeah So after that height There was a valley And I'm not attempting to relicator Get in a Yeah The reason's there's a valley But I've certainly been in valleys But I've never been on a mountain as high as yours Before I was in the valley As low as that And so What emotionally was happening there And how did you regulate

1:18:19During that period When you're going, going, going, going, going On a super high And also I wasn't even really perceiving How famous I had gotten I feel like A regular girl In the Twin Cities Walk into the bar Gonna get some cheese curds and a beer I still feel like that girl But the whole world It's like everything I did was news I had been going full throttle It was like clothing line It was like TV show Tour Album actually really doing well Like, oh my god I didn't even know how well that album is doing I wasn't paying attention I was just Doing, you know Making my little tic-tocs I had always planned to just like stop My last show Was in Japan On that tour I had never been in Japan I've been waiting to go to Japan my whole life You know, Sailor Moon Yeah And I was about to spend some time here And I wasn't going to tour I was gonna take time to work on the next album I had really planned to just like stop But I also stopped While the world stopped

1:19:20Fucking with me And it was really weird Because it was just like Yeah And I was like, whoa This feels like My life is over Yeah Okay, now, quick question here Because when I've had These things Some part of me goes Yep, I knew it That she was gonna drop It's too good to be true I didn't deserve it I've had that fear My whole life about everything And I don't know why it's a common thing With people who are successful We are always looking over our shoulder Because I know with me personally It started when we were in Detroit And then Detroit got taken away from my family Got taken away from me Church got taken away from me And then after that My dad died when I was 19 Taking away By the way, every time Something kind of good is going Yeah But like you just found your Shit in high school You're in college Taking away It's taken away And so with the fame thing And the success And the public perception Being super positive And being overly loved And people understanding me I wasn't looking over my shoulder

1:20:21For a shoe to drop Because I really genuinely Was moving so purely I really Which they say you shouldn't do Just really showed the whole world My heart Uh-huh You let your guard down There was no guard ever You know Type deal Like I came into this thing Myself And I was like Honored myself And I was just bumbling around Is myself unabashedly So When everybody Started hating me I kind of didn't understand And I think anyone in this position Because it happens to a lot of artists Like it happens to every artist Especially now You look up and it's like Uh-oh now everyone hates them What happened Yeah We never expect that's going to happen us Do you remember when there was a fight in high school And like you'd see a huge crowd of kids Running to go watch the fight Did that happen in Houston That was like where I grow It was constantly like You be at your locker and also The big mob is going Oh shit But go And someone's going to get their ass kicked They fired The inner that to me is that it's like The pile And you can see the big mob coming You're like Oh I got to get a piece of this I had experienced little waves of it But this time after my tour ended It was like legitimate

1:21:21So I really did feel like my life was over Because music had been my life And I didn't feel like Anyone wanted me to make music I only signed to a major label So I could help people Because I was cool being an indie artist But then I was like But I'm making music that makes people Feel better about themselves And seek love for themselves Specially girls Especially black girls Especially big girls Yeah Folks that deserve Gay boys Trans people People who felt Other So I was like I'll sign to Atlantic Because if that means You all will get my music out to more people I think of my music as medicine So I was like Oh wow Should I cease to exist You're right It was really heavy It's really heavy And I think you have to kind of go To a very very very very low place To be able to kind of float back up to the top I had to stop making Everything external about me Everything I was having outside I was like That don't got nothing to do with me anymore Like who am I Who's in my real life Who does see day to day Let me tell you something It was nobody for a while

1:22:23But can I ask this Here's what I've been guilty of At moments that We've had great success That has been something I can lean on When I'm doing some other shit Like for me it was I had a relapse right And it was like This isn't good We know this isn't good We know that me using is not good I'm not an idiot But then I go Man this other thing's going so good I'm just going to think about this Like I had something to lean on That was pretty powerful for me And I think If in the wake of me Also collapsing on that And then also I don't even have the thing I had been leaning on We're at a very lonely, scary spot Like I don't even have the crutch now Of success Oh my god Yes, I know exactly what you mean I can't even really articulate it But I understand what you're saying Yeah It's like just keeping myself above water Because I know I have this thing That's really quite special and good But by God if you took that For me at that moment I don't know Like again I don't know if I can exist at that moment Because it's all I'm using to keep myself afloat

1:23:24You know When I came to it's like Knowing who you are And not like what you do And I feel like I had been identifying myself as what I do for so long Instead of remembering who I am Because that's my job And everyone in the world might not actually know me Like I thought they did Yeah It's like oh wait, there's no false It's like realizing Oh this thing I thought was real Is actually kind of false In some ways that's freeing Isn't it a little bit? It was extremely free Because I'm like oh only I know me Only I know who I am And I need to remember that And not allow someone to change that Because I can do that too I can allow someone to make me feel bad Even though I didn't I used to get emotionally manipulated a lot Actually to this day I kind of still Because I'm so like sweet and understanding and forgiving Yeah And you're taking advantage Oh my oh my god Yes I need protectors around me And so now I feel like I have all these protective people And when I be right to guess you're not great at boundaries

1:24:28No I'm okay But now I am Yeah, yeah You know what's so crazy It's like when you're a famous person The more famous you become The more boundaries you have The more people look at you like you're a bad person It's like hey that's fucked up But I'm like but I have to protect myself Yeah, yeah, yeah You know so I was always like No you have access to me Everyone has access to me I will never be that famous person And then no one can talk to you And no one can like No, no I know I There's only so much of you Yes You know I have to save some for you Yeah So I learned that as well Did you come to that on your owner Did you have therapy? Did you have help I did have therapy I've had the same therapist Since like 2017 That's kind of helpful Because she got to see the whole Yeah, the whole enchilada I'm like actually we're like trauma bonded now Because you just see it all Sister you're not going anywhere But like I have that And honestly I'm not going to hold y'all Like I was talking out loud To myself

1:25:28Into God But I would just be like One day things have to be better One day things have to be better One day I'm going to wake up In a reality where I don't feel like shit Where I am happy And I was saying these things And then one day After the next You look up and you're like Oh I don't have to say this anymore Because I'm here Yeah It was a lot of self work And a lot of self awareness You kind of have to have It's like Hey you know you shouldn't do that Or you shouldn't give this person access to you in that way Or you shouldn't put yourself in that position Or you know you've been putting yourself in this Fucked up position for so long You know that this person been Kind of boxing you out and manipulating you And you thought this was going on But really this was going on You need to watch the people around you And this is the biggest thing that I learned from therapy Is my inner child Had been leading the show the whole time My inner child who was like I don't want everyone to get along And we're all going up just naively optimistic And now Growing up me is protecting baby me I'm like no stop you can't No, get back here Get behind me Yeah the girl with the bound feet And the fucked up hair

1:26:29Yeah the mold and the bun Okay No wow He's dragged No that little girl you got to protect No we got to protect Yeah Girl no Yeah Yeah You can't trust these people So I am proud I'm not done though I'm learning new shit We all are Oh my god It's not over Yeah yeah yeah Okay so how do we end up Writing Lil Lizzo meets Sasha B. Fluten Can I kind of give you the description I wrote out of that It's so adorable Of course I did It's such a sweet book It is it's about a little girl feeling lost and alone in a new school She's a roomful of instruments Gives them all the world but none of them land Then Sasha B. Fluten said what about me The two you go on a ride Stopping in the jungle the sea in the sky And every time you try to make the sounds of those places Nothing comes out But when you and Sasha look into yourselves Into your heart a sound finally comes out And that is the sound that brings all the kids together It's the sound that you make that lets you know you belong Oh my god Is that a good description

1:27:30Yes With the cutest little drawings Oh I know And the cutest little imaginary world I just feel like this book makes me emotional every time I think about it And I said I fucking wrote it And I dead ass wrote it like no funny shit I got video footage on me writing this mother fucking book And me sketching little lizard to give to Mark Pet Like I'm really hands in this book But I get emotional every time I think about it Because everyone's interpretation of it And every person I sit with as they read it or I read it too It elicits a different response I'm the same way with my music though I could play a song for somebody And a different person different person And it'll hit different every time The way you surmised it With going to the space And the sea and the jungle And like you try to play those sounds But those sounds were not you Yeah Oh my god Just tearing it upright out because it's true I wanted it to have a where to wow things are Kind of surrealism Yes Where you know the walls De-materialize And suddenly he's like in a boat Well again you already told us like you lived in La La

1:28:31I did And so this is the book is the La La Yes exactly And when I would walk into the band hall It was like nothing outside of that were mattered Only band kids understand the intense feeling of family And importance It was so fucking important to us The music that we were playing The march that we had to do Anything outside that room We just drowned out Because we were so focused And we were so in tune with each other And so when she walks in that room She's like what was all of us about I want to know And she finds Sasha Sasha called to her The flute picked me when I was in fifth grade There was something about the flute being difficult That I was like super super drawn to And I loved a challenge I was like such an overachiever Just poindexter So when I was chosen She was like you Because it was just such a magical moment I just she looked down on me and smiled And was like you And I was like yay That was my Sasha being like you gonna sleep on the flutes You gonna leave on the flutes? Exactly They chose each other I do like drawing the parallels

1:29:33Between my actual childhood experience with the flute Because that's the reason why I wrote the book I wanted to tell the story in a colorful way I've been playing the flute When did I first pull it out At the BET Awards and Twork and Rihanna stood up 2019 BET Awards, 1819 They've been asking me about flute since then We're about to be about a decade of the re-length So why flute? How flute? And I was like here Let me put it down for you Our friend Molly When we were all at the height of our Lizzo obsession Molly was obsessed with Sasha B Right? She talked about Sasha B all the time People have a connection to Sasha Separately from you And I think this book is gonna do that even more Because of her personification in the book It's not just the whole thing Yeah, I've been outcast too Yeah, yeah, yeah See me Yeah, it's beautiful And Sasha's so funny and brassy And like she's got a little hands on her hip and her little rainbow buttons And she's a fun girl Yeah, she's being played wrong the entire

1:30:36And at the end, it's like And that's when you create the sound And it's like breathing And I wanted to throw a little bit of mindfulness And breath work in there at the end So that you can sit with your young ins And you can be like Okay, now sit and take a deep breath White when you get to that point And they take a deep breath A deep breath makes anyone feel good Sometimes when you say deep breath It makes you want to take a deep breath Or when you say yawn It makes you want to yawn Okay, the very last thing I want to talk to you about Is I was watching the Galking interview And she wanted to talk to you about your use of the word bitch Oh yeah Look, I love Galking, we all love Galking But she's like you're going through You know, we use it a lot Okay, and then she said You know, what about a little girl hearing that word? That was part of it, right? And I just want to say that One morning probably four years ago I think Lincoln was nine Our oldest daughter She came into our bedroom It was one of those days, right? She just did not want to go to school

1:31:38She was just feeling defeated by everything And she said I can't do it I didn't feel as she was sad and all the stuff And I said come with me And we went to our mirror I've told the story in here before But we went to the mirror And I said I want you to repeat after me Okay, and she goes okay She's nine I go I'm a bad bitch And I'm gonna fuck this day up And this little nine year old goes I'm a bad bitch And I'm gonna fuck this day up Yes And do your spirit change Like you can't imagine on a dime And then I told that story on here And then all these kind of women in our life It became a little anthem I'm a bad bitch And I'm gonna fuck this day up And then this was given to us Oh my god Look at the little baby face So I just want to thank you Because our family anthem That gets us through our bad days Is I'm a bad bitch I'm gonna fuck this day up And that's because of you Really? Yeah Wow Because my little girls

1:32:39They got introduced to that word As a powerful word As something that makes you feel Yes Like you can walk out on strong The way that I feel about That thing with profanity And children is I don't like to cuss around Kids at all I grew up in the church I don't cuss around my mama Okay sure To this day And I'm a grown ass woman So that's how my mind is But I also feel like we live in a world Where it isn't an inevitability That they're gonna hear these words Like I was hearing cuss words when I was And I was like what is that What is that First grade on the playground You're every homeless word imaginable You're gonna hear it So it's like Better to disarm Some of these words So that younger people Cannot have the negative effect Taking the power out of fat Taking the power out of bitch That someone can hurt you with You know Giving the power back to you The way you neutralize them Is they go bitch And you're like Fuck yeah And I'm like Oh That didn't have the effect I wanted I wanted to hurt you And minimize you And reduce you I was so fat I see I might ask this fat

1:33:39Yeah Exactly Like okay And you want to bite it Yeah Or else you wouldn't be talking about it Right So much So yes I do think that In the inevitability And a part of my work Is disarming words Like that And toxic words Like that Cause I want people to Be kind to each other But that's not realist That was not going to happen That's not the world We have to disarm the bullies That's right I love that No, it's just a judo move on it all Yeah Well I've been wanting to do this For five, six years I'm so happy You've been alluding us for so long Yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah We've been wanting you forever I hear that so much I'm like Guys, I promise I'm down the street Well now you got boundaries So We caught you when your boundaries were dead Oh my god No Like five or five years ago We probably would have been doing sequela shots Right Glad to have conversation five, six years later Yeah, maybe maybe this is the time he was perfect for this Yeah, yeah It was so funny Are you guys No, you drink beer

1:34:39No, I don't I haven't drank in 22 years I just love it I've been drinking all the beer Oh, duels Okay Okay Dio no duels You own a duels No No, don't I just have to have one Don't do it What I gotta hold this up It's the cutest book ever Please Little Lizzo Meet Sasha Be Fluten Out September 9th September Guys, it's a great It is Get it for your little beautiful girl And there's a flute song in the end You can hit the QR code And go listen to a special flute song Lizzo, I adore you Thank you for coming This was so fun Yeah, I have so much fun with y'all I can talk all day Come back Okay, let's go out with a song Okay, here we go That's not gonna work for me I'm gonna focus on you All the big fights Long nights that you've been through I got a bottle I let the key out And say For you Balls up and change the line You can have it on a sacrifice Don't you get wrong We can make it right So go and let it all hang out tonight You don't know who you are

1:35:42Oh, you wanted that Oh, wow You're better off You're better off I'm better off Oh Woo Good Um All right Listen There's feet on the view anymore Y'all gonna be sweating these damn chairs Y'all find it You see my back Okay All right I sure hope there weren't any mistakes in that episode But we'll find out when my mom Mrs. Monica comes in And tells us who's wrong Okay, you have a story Yeah, I have a couple You withheld this happens to us in real life occasionally Yeah Where I see you Normally I'd hear some fun story And then you have to reserve it

1:36:43In the fact Yeah I'm too actually Oh my god Okay, but I'm gonna start with this one first Okay So happy birthday Jess, Jess is 50 today That's a big old number That's a big boy That's a big boy for a big boy And he's finally grown into his age Exactly He's aged into his growth He's aged into his stature So we went to Palm Springs for just like 36, 38 hours I was told by Anna you were blessed with no traffic on the way there Which is rare on a Friday It was great Maybe because it was 126 there It was hot Yeah It was really hot So it was me, Jess, Anna, Erica and Charlie We kept it small for many reasons when it was very impromptu But Jess, we wanted to go to this very specific restaurant That I think max is five people The tables With the only five customers at once No, no sorry, like each table

1:37:43You can't have like more than five people Maybe six But I think five They don't have big tables Yeah, exactly So we went It was so fun Um Restaurant incredible What kind of cuisine American Palm Sprint Everything's fusion, doesn't it? I would say it's fusion Like I had a burger I'm gonna have a pork chop Steak-free Okay, so hardy for it American, yeah And then there was a really cool bar attached to it That we went to Anyway, great But like chill Night, like we Written the pool and then we did the dinner Oh, and I walked to shopping which was The first time I've ever thought No, maybe the second time The other time was in Georgia When you were in your Your family really wanted to drive you You were gonna take a walk Oh yeah, but I don't regret that That was like I thought you said you got on the walk And you were like, gets too hot for this walk No, okay I don't regret that Okay I had some regrets in Paris

1:38:44When I'm out when I was out there in the He-bubble Yeah, and he bubble But then this was only This was a three-minute drive I was like, I'm walking This is crazy Yeah So it was like a 16, 17-minute walk I get out there two minutes And I was like, oh wow I'm like So hot and I'm getting nervous Like it's then I'm starting to panic Yeah, so I'm taking deep breaths But I made it there You're a console cycle Exactly Exactly But I made it there to the store And then two minutes later the store closed I didn't look up the timing So that was really upsetting Anyway, easy Great day, fun day Now this hotel Has two parts to it It has a Normal part With like rooms Great rooms A big pool And then There's an area The special area called the bungalows Okay

1:39:45They're extra And it's like kind of its own private area So if you don't have a key card to that You can't get in there And it has its own waiting pool This is what you posted a photo of I have an image of a long rectangular pool And then seemingly bungalows on the sides Yes There's bungalows on the sides And then in the pool on one side There's like Six or so chairs that are in the pool And so you can like lounge and be wet It's so nice I mean the pool is like 18 inches Okay So there's no Yeah There's no diving No There's no diving There's no swimming You just like lay in it No hold your breath contest Yeah And it is kind of funny When people are walking Because they just like splash Then there's walking through And it must have been so warm as well I mean they would maybe even have to Cool it at that depth In that heat The first day people thought it was Could be a little bit cooler Okay Not me Because you know I like the heat The second day we thought it was nice

1:40:46Okay great Anyway So we get back after dinner And we decide to get in the pool The pool closes at 10 Okay interesting For Palm Springs I feel like it would be open later But continue Lovely So then So Pool closes at 10 It's 8 40 When we get home And we all get in our bathing suits We're all drinking water Like no one We are not rowdy I guess is the whole Purpose of me saying this We all get in the pool We're hanging We're chatting We're drinking water And somebody opens the door To the bungalow behind us Opens it like What's this like A broccoli A broccoli Thank you And he said He was a guy He was probably I would say 60 Or Younger but had You know Some hardmiles Thank you Okay And he said

1:41:48He's holding back there What happened Okay Let's talk about it Oh That scared me Thought he was being attacked back there before I thought he had a seizure Yeah Figure pick Okay So he opens the door And he said I can hear you And we laughed Like we thought he was Shocking Being funny To remind people who don't know Charlie So we have Charlie Perfect and Charlie Yes Charlie just meet Erica Anna Charlie is huge and muscular And Jess is huge as well Jess is Intimulating when he stands up Right but we're on the pool So he comes out And he is like He's like You're wake You're waking everybody up We're asleep We're asleep You and then What's so interesting is the way Everyone starts behaving differently

1:42:48Right So Erica I can feel how I would I know the feeling that would be in my body Yes Which is Similar to Charlie Sure Okay But Eric was like Don't worry we'll move And I know And I was like No Yeah And Charlie was like Hey you need to chill man Okay yeah sure And he said I need to chill And Charlie was like Yeah man you need to chill And he like turns around And this guy is like I would never do this to you To him To Charlie's was everyone To all like Wake them up Or something He was like We're asleep I said I said It's nine Yeah And Charlie was like It's Friday night Charlie was like The pool closes at 10 Yeah It's nine o'clock And he's screaming at us And getting closer He's starting to walk towards What is his

1:43:49His physical stature Oh You're not great at this I'm not good at this He's not tiny Okay But okay So then Charlie gets up And he's Is kind of Copical because you know It's like 18 inches He's just like standing at this Like you know water does Angles basically And he's like You need to go back and say You know Charlie's like You need to go back and say And he's like Oh With you and your tattoos You think you're a tough man I was like Oh my god What is about to happen This guy who hasn't been punched out Too long Been too long He's been acting He's been acting like this To people and getting away with it And we heard A woman inside She's so sick of being this Exactly Yeah Glenn Steve Okay Steve Steve come to bed She said you could hear inside And then Charlie was like Steve go to bed And then he was just

1:44:50Carrying on Carrying on finally he went Inside Okay But it was a real Showdown Showdown And I Did not expect to feel what I Felt Okay Yeah Okay It was really interesting Where are you feeling I was like I Can don't this Yeah Yeah I can don't Charlie But Charlie Didn't He did not Escalate He did not cross the line And he He said after he was like I just told myself Do not get out of this pool Alright because then There weren't an hour and another Six weeks Yeah And a police or maybe come Like I Yeah, so I didn't want any of that to happen But I was glad that he was Saying stuff and standing up to him And I also I was like It's nine. I was like Sir we are allowed to He didn't hear me at all He couldn't hear women Yeah But I was not afraid The confrontation And then I was like Whoa this feels not natural for me

1:45:51Meanwhile Oh it's happening to me Meanwhile Erica Jess and Anna Have like moved into the air And Erica keeps telling us She's like come on guys Come on like come Charlie come Like you know she's obviously Steven Charlie Yeah Yeah Um The wives are like come on Everybody let's just But Drop this But no No to dropping it Like this guy Like I did feel like moving felt like He won And it was Nine o'clock in Palm Springs And oh I think I said something like We've all paid to be here Yeah Yeah We're all What what makes you think you can come Like if you I understand if it's loud First of all you can come out and say Hey guys I'm so sorry I mean whatever there's a million ways to do this We go to bed so early Exactly We like to go to bed at seven Uh-huh Yeah But you could do that Or you need to really Take it up with the hotel You also don't get a room next to the pool But all the bungalows are right there

1:46:53So that's not for you Exactly So this is an hotel for you You need to get seated tucked into the corner And you visit the pool and you want to Yeah like Yeah This isn't the hotel for you This is the way it's done The beef's with the architect my friend Exactly Yeah yeah So Then Yeah So we were all like a little like Ampton kind of frazzled But it was it is funny Everyone behaves so differently in these situations And I'm sure so much of it is Childhood so much of it is Just personality I guess Like I was kind of surprised Like I was surprised Erica wasn't more confrontational Uh-huh Because she's very strong And like speaks her mind And stuff like that In general But she's also in public relations So she's really really good at Deescalating You know tensions that are rising She has these big events You know So she's got to be a Master judo expert at redirecting these hostiles

1:47:54You know Yeah She's really well-practiced She's like dealing with the public A ton and clients And yeah And Anna was sort of some In the middle Because she was like what Like she was saying Like kind of some stuff But then Not enough for her to like really hold her around And then just you know Kind of gets up And then staggers away She got trips five times Literally He wants nothing to do With confrontation really That's interesting Because he often does I don't think he does He does My experience with him And one time we got And a fight about this Yeah, yeah That's like someone called Someone gay Or That's what I'm about And then It wasn't Anna It was somebody else But yes some Thing happened And she was really upset And then just like Went inside to go deal with it And then he came back And had done nothing And then I was really annoyed So So we're all just so Different in these circumstances And you know Normally I think I'm like

1:48:55No We just still who cares Who cares Just we need to walk away That person has nothing to do with us But I didn't feel that way Interest At all How do we describe this And I was like This is your New thing This is your Auntie vibes coming out Now you're an Auntie I don't I don't like that I Now I'm starting to wonder why Ever thought I don't know I'm fine in confrontation We do know this Yeah Yeah Yeah So I don't know why Ever thought that I Well I'm imagining You think you are Anti-physical Colle Violent Physical Comprehensive Yes Which I am I am too Yeah Until someone forces Physical confrontation And then Yeah Then I go Okay this is how you want to Have this confrontation I can do either I'll I'll Are you with you Or if you want to get down I'm on your Huckleberry Like let's let's do that

1:49:56I know That'll be conclusive That's my why I like it I still don't like it I don't like it I'm really proud of Charlie For staying in the pool I'm glad he did Yeah But when this man Is coming towards us With this anger And like Scream me and he's so aggressive I was like Wow Like I do feel like Maybe he deserves to get hit Which is I've never felt that So it's really wild Then a good thing We're transitioning you and I Like now you're into And I'm kind of like I'm retiring From all of it So it's good that we weren't ever Out on the scene Oh god Both of us that way Because again I have this chip On my shoulder About guys who have power in their jobs And they're used to like Fucking screaming at people And and doing things that Would otherwise get them Into a fist fight Like you can't just Do that Unless you have some Bullshit arbitrary power you're used to

1:50:57And you literally can't click out of Yeah, you're not in your office, bro And I don't work for you And you can't Talk to people like this Yeah, I guess Because I think I live with so much That you you can't talk to people like that You can't treat people like that Like I live with a lot of those feelings Yeah So I guess I was just like Yeah, this Maybe is the heat The heat had you I mean also he was just so clearly Obviously had been drinking like all day long Obviously who knows the bet It was insane As you said 10 pm is too early Yes, yes, yes For volumns fringes on a Friday night Yeah So that was wild And then it led to a different conversation Where I So Then Charlie went to the front And he just said hey just so you know This is how this unbriable Exactly And I And this is also I guess a way that I Act I was like Someone's getting an email Someone's getting an email tomorrow

1:52:00The hotel's getting a stern email And I said that to everyone I was like I'm telling the hotel Like that this was completely unacceptable And then then we were kind of split Okay Because some people were like Well it's not They're a fault And I was like it's not their fault It is absolutely not their fault Yeah But this happened at their hotel Uh-huh It Ruined A section of the night Yeah And it Could And maybe did have an impact On whether or anyone's We're ever coming back here Okay So I think it is up to the hotel to say like I'm so sorry that happened here Um you all get to come back for a full week For frams No not like that But still I do think it's a responsibility of the establishment To do what they can Um To make you want to come back Because I did think like oh well if this

1:53:00And also if it is too loud for people Like that's a problem Yeah yeah And I don't want to have dealt with that person I hated that You know I kind of liked it but I hated it Yeah a little bit you liked it Uh and Yeah so then we got we were all in a debate about that Me and Charlie of course Of course yeah He's the great email writer Yeah he loved exactly But To be clear we both But we're not like oh this is the hotel's fault But So I'm on the side of the confront that guy Uh Uh And then not on the side of like It's too bad you guys had to deal with that guy And now these people working there got to deal with this guy Downriver Yeah but here's the thing that's also true like They might need to put a flag on that or say to him like hey if you come back to this hotel That can't happen again Exactly like they need to know Go ahead and call us If you think someone's being too loud and we'll look at you

1:54:02Exactly Yeah So did you write an email I did not Uh okay Because then I got in my head about it a little bit I'm still debating Okay Cuz like I just Cuz I was thinking like okay if this happened at a restaurant Okay cuz Jess was like no like they don't whatever and I was like Jess If this happened at a restaurant in some patron Screamed at another patron and like stormed over and stuff Of course it's not the restaurant's fault But the restaurant is gonna do something The restaurant is probably gonna Santa Md is there Something Yeah yeah yeah And like Pay for their coffees Tell the guy like you can't do that here You're not welcome here anymore Yeah Well maybe When Charlie gave them the whole lay of the land I know but they would have decided He didn't say it to anyone He said it to a bell hop Kind of Like there's no one there Oh they were

1:55:03So that's why I felt the email was really necessary Okay Cuz I wanted to speak to a manager the hotel owner Not just the front that Cuz I agree with you there right I'm like what's this front desk person gonna do she's trying to get through their ship Yeah so this is more of a higher up situation That I wanted I wanted to I'm gonna Okay Yeah Let me know how that goes Okay It just was wild this year And then I hope you're really bad for the life Yeah I mean that's she's linked to this guy You think it's not a stand alone That's not someone's first time acting like that Steve come back to bed Steve we can't do this again That's what I mean I'm not going to value out again Although Let's just devil's advocate Maybe she was in there going Steve go fucking tell him to stop Go get like she could have been goading him Then he snapped Cuz his wife's yelling She could have Yeah But some that's a scenario that happened sometime

1:56:03That happens That could definitely happen I love friend his wife's always getting into fights And he's just like he can hear it from the car and he's like oh god She's she's yelling at the construction workers How long before they call her a bitch And then I got to get out of the car So yeah No she could definitely could have been I just felt like This is a tough tough situation And then the next day we were at the other pool At the bar And he and this is like at two or one or something And he comes up And so we're all just kind of like Standing there and he doesn't say anything to us And orders his drinks and then Goes so we think he doesn't remember Okay, yeah, so he might have been Heavenly intoxicated Okay, one of the many reasons he would have lost that tussle with Charlie Oh yeah You think you're a big man I co- When he started saying that I was like I was like who do you think you are Like who

1:57:04I mean it's crazy because I was like yeah you're asking for him to hit you When you go up into space you're your tauntina bear Yeah, oh with your tattoos It was wild Wow exciting It was exciting Yeah very exciting But the hell was our money back Okay Okay great Was that that was one of two stories Yes Okay, this is a different male story Okay I was on the west side on Thursday And once you get to the west side Depending on your timing you have to stay there Yeah, you're there for the day You're there for the day and to the night Yeah, so traffic dies down at 8 p.m. Exactly So I was there and then I was like okay where do I go Kill time So I went to a place called Ball Terre It's a restaurant It's in Brentwood And I've been there before And I was like oh they have like a loungey area so it's like I'll do work there I have my computer

1:58:04So I went and they were like have a um See wherever that doesn't say reserved So I went there was one table in the back that didn't say reserved So I sat there and there was like obviously Some sort of like gathering happening like kind of like maybe it was like a work Post work or work thing Uh-huh Anyway, I'm sitting there and then this guy comes up to me this man And he was like I haven't met you yet I would say he okay I pretty much think everyone's 60 Yeah, it sounds like People are your age or they're 60 No people are 25 or they're 60 Um and he came up to me and he said I haven't met you yet And I was like oh I'm not party your party And he was like oh and I said but they told me to sit where Where ever I wanted if it didn't say reserved net doesn't say reserved and he was like oh, it's all reserved and I was like oh

1:59:04Uh Any and he was like but you're you're fine. You're fine. You're not bothering anyone like you stay and I was like How did it build up at this point with all the reserved tables? No, there was like a couple more but like people were coming They're filing and I wasn't a very I was like at a big table but that because I was the only one You're a six-stop or something Through the only one that didn't say reserved yeah, and I was like well, no, I don't want to be I don't want to like intrune he was like no no no no you're fine And then like the as bar tender server lady comes up and she's like this is a server. I was like okay. Yeah, it doesn't say it Um and so I sat here, but where should I go? Yeah, and he she was like do you want to sit at the bar like the actual bar And I was like well am I allowed to with my computer? Yeah, yes, it's like okay great I go I sit at the bar now I am the first in Like the front seat uh-huh where people would put in cocktail orders to your right like the servers exactly except okay But it's on the left and There was one seat there, but yeah, it's like on the corner. I'm not sitting there, you know

2:00:09So I'm workies and it's great getting my edits done. I always wonder I'm like people can see uh-huh So they're just seeing um Me and you and Lizzo Anyway Um, so I'm sitting there. I'm doing work and then I look over and the Bar tender like comes and he puts down this place mat this leather place mat at the seat next to me No one else has this by the way And he puts like a knife in a fork and I thought huh who is about to come sit here? Yeah, the president Exactly. Yeah, so I'm kind of keeping an eye out and then a man comes and sits there I don't recognize him um, but I'm noticing that Every one like the staff wise is coming up to him and they're all like really engaging with him Holding him 60, okay, great. It feels stupid asking

2:01:14And um, and I'm like who is this guy? Yeah, you love this. This is happening in New York This happens to me all the time. Yeah, yeah, someone a very VIP enters this You're intrigued yep. I'm intrigued people are and then I think but I've had fun since I can't hear that well But I hear something about sports was like maybe this guy like Owns the sports team or something and he was wearing a suit. Oh, okay, so then I'm intrigued and then I take out my headphones to get a drink right? So I'm just like I take them out and I'm waiting for a second and he Says ceases uh-huh. He does he says It was like 540 or something and he was like you you have to stop working at 545 and I was like Well, I don't think that's gonna happen and he was like um Well, they're gonna kick you out, but he was being very very playful. I was not like

2:02:15Nervous or anything, but I was like oh, I guess I'll be on the street with my computer in my martini then And then he laughed and laughed That's joking ever heard And I was wearing a baby Schumer joke Yeah, oh my god, you're not going to believe what she said. Kate upton ding ding ding upton Um, I was wearing a bandana that day. I've never worn one before so I think I was feeling like a new personality Yeah, persona going. Yeah, yeah, um, and she was cool this girl me um, so then You know, we talked for another second or whatever Get my drink. I like kind of put my headphones back in and then all and then this other person comes up to me Extreme a shout out extremely attractive man Comes up to me and I take my heavens and he said are you Monica? Said yes, he said I'm a huge armchair. Oh my god, and he was extremely attractive. Yes. Yeah to me James Marsden energy

2:03:15Whoa, that's huge energy, uh-huh, and I was like Not then my bandana was doing nothing for me. I was you were back to yeah being an ugly dog with a lot of Um, and I was like oh, that's so nice. He was like you just had a birthday happy birthday, and I was like thanks Um, I'm editing. I always tell people that I'm editing right now. Yeah sure Um behind the curtain. Yeah, and then he said he said can I take a picture Uh for my wife uh bomber. Yeah, okay, and um, and I was like sure of course and then he Looks at this guy and he says can you take a picture for us and he hands the phone to him. Yeah, exciting Now that now the old-timers like shit this bitch is famous. So he says yeah, takes a picture I say buy to the armchair he walks away and the guy says okay, well, I need to know who you are Uh-huh. He just said I own the cardinals Stay tuned for more armchair expert if you dare

2:04:24I Said oh, I have a I have a podcast and he was like oh Well What is it and I said it's called armchair expert. I I Hosted it with um Daq shepherd and he was like oh he's like you do look familiar. I was like well I know you're gonna say you do look like Daq I thought it was you Daq Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha no he said you do look kind of familiar I was like well, I mean if you don't listen to show you it's probably not he was like well I mean I know of course I know Daq's and I was like yeah, and he was like well Then I think I put my headphones back in or something So much actually happened Yeah, this is like sitcom pacing. Yeah, like cheers now this person enters that person exits They open the door to this conversation. Yeah, exactly and so then I think I take my headphones out again or something and he sees this again. He's quick. He knows you know And he's like to sit next to someone on the airplane

2:05:26Yeah, he said I just a doom scrolled you oh wow Yeah, and I said doom scrolls like well that's I think a bad thing and he was like my daughter He has a 24-year-old daughter so my daughter calls it that um and he was like your famous uh And I said I think you're famous based on what I can see has been going on here for the past hour Yeah, and I said and I said who are you? Yeah nice. What the screw? uh my band-hano was doing a lot of the heavy lift. Yeah you were back to bandanamo Uh-huh and then Then things start going wild, right? Like he's like oh no, I'm just a regular here. And I was like It doesn't feel like that you have your own place, Matt. I know how this works. And then he said he works for some people. Okay. And then the bartender, this really nice bartender, Carlos, I learned about Carlos. He comes up and he was like, not 60.

2:06:26No. Carlos is not 60. Yeah, yeah, I had a hunch. He wasn't 60. And Carlos is joking with this man. He's like, how'd you get her to talk to you? I've been trying to talk to her. Well, Carlos was saying that now, but you are the head of this bar. You should go here all the time. I would never leave this. Well, listen, so balteir is a very specific place. It is a specific vibe. People are there to meet people. Oh, great. Great. Now, to me, it's a type, so west side. And so I think that's also like the cultures in LA are very different. The west side is very different from the east side. Yeah. I think I felt kind of like in a fun way fish out of water. Uh-huh, yeah, yeah. Because I'm in a bandana. Yeah, yeah. A like Terry cloth, Susie Condi. Great shirt. Green shirt. You know, people are in pants, like loose pants. People are there and basically they're underwear, you know? Oh.

2:07:27People are there looking sexy. It's very specific. And I guess this is Thursday night. And Thursday night is live music night. And so it was like so packed. Yeah, okay. Wow. And I think it gave me confidence because I was like, oh my god. Like what is this is such a scene? Yes, yes. And I think this person was intrigued by me because I was not doing this, you know? Like this band. This is me at the four seasons with the tattoos. Like, yeah. But I didn't. But you were enjoying it. I was enjoying it. And I wasn't on the prowl. Like if I was on the prowl, then I would be like, oh, I like look crazy. Uh-huh. But I. But I'm saying you got to experience thing I'm always trying to say is like, oh yeah, I kind of dig that everyone. Yeah. I'm not participating, which removes me from the stakes of it all. That's, yes, definitely. It removed me. It removed the stakes, but also, yeah, I just felt really confident in my band. Yeah, great. So then we start talking.

2:08:28I talked to this person for, I leave it nine. Uh-huh. And we talk the whole time and then we have some other friends next to us that we make. Yeah, great. And there's like an hour and a half of talking or more like three and a half hours. Wow. This is a meat cut. And then like I eat some of this steak and I order a potato. Yeah. Wow. This is so fun. It was. You were being a hand in hot over. I was because of then I ordered a burrolo. Shout out. If anyone wants to send me burrolo, it is my favorite wine. Oh, that's a wine. It's a type of wine and it is very rarely on the menu as a by the glass. They want you to get the bottle. Yeah. So, but they had it by the glass. And so I ordered a burrolo and he said to Carlos, he said, ah, the perfect woman. Oh, yeah, this is very. He's Italian. The man was not Carlos. The man was. Because Carlos would go either way. I was thinking Latino, but he actually could be Spanish.

2:09:29Yeah. Carlos, uh, science. Exactly. Anyway, um, he, so, so that was fun. And we talked about everything. We talked about dating. Um, he's, he's looking. Yeah, he's divorced, but he has a great relationship with his, um, ex-wife and his, unfortunately, his house burdened out in the palisades, which is very sad. But now I live in Beverly Hills and we talked and I asked him what happened in this marriage. Oh, yeah. And, um, I asked what he's looking for on a partner. Yeah. All these things. I told him about the dairy queen story. Uh-huh. Okay. Yeah. So we just, Chad. And how over it was he being, was he going like, well, that's crazy because you are so beautiful. Was he going hard? He didn't say you're so beautiful, but he was giving me compliments. Yeah. Yeah. And we discussed trips. We discussed everything about me. Wow. Exciting. I was just enjoying him so much. Yeah. Like, I, and I was like, oh my god, this is my new friend.

2:10:30Like, he's a fun friend. Yeah. And I got his name. We exchanged numbers. Yeah, yeah. And he paid for my, all my drinks. Sure. Of course. He lives in Beverly Hills. Well, it was actually really cute because I obviously wanted to pay. And I went to pay and then Carlos, you know, gave me my check, but it was just a smiley face. Oh, no. Really? He gave Carlos the wing. Oh. He probably got it all like sorted out. Oh, he has it all dialed. At one point, they gave me a place map. Oh, my goodness. I know. Because I said, I said, oh my god. I mean, he had to just have to pay. He didn't even ever hang out with him again. I know. Because the elephant in the room is I'm sure he'd love to make love to you. So how do you? I'm not. I don't want, I would like to keep it as a friendship, but I also like kind of like that it was like, it was a, what's that called in the pan? Flash in the pan. Like it was like a really fun just night. One off. Yeah.

2:11:31And I like really just have a fondness for him and for that evening. And I don't really know how these older men will you say they just, they're just a good time. And then I'll say, you're like, he's definitely listening to this. Oh, well, so shout out. You know who you are. I did over here. I'm saying he's buying a house in Puglia. Where the hell's Puglia? Oh, Jesus. I know. You're going to be on a wooden criss-crap boat on Lake Omaha. I did think. But this is how it happens. Yeah. This is exactly how it happens. And also he's great. Like he had a great personality. Very enjoyable to talk to. Funny, understood, funny, which was great. And so like I said, I would keep my eyes peeled for someone for him. Uh-huh. More in his age range. I don't know. I don't know. But I, I, I don't know. I just. Did you ask him what age he dates? I did. Yeah. What do you say?

2:12:31He said he doesn't have like, he doesn't have any restrictions on that. 20s fine. He said he's like 20s, 30s, 30s, 30s. He was just like, it doesn't matter as long and then he gave me some requirements, which were good requirements. He likes that people had their own thing. Yes. Of course. Which is what I also like. Me too. Yeah. Exactly. So anyway, I, um, I don't want a passenger. Exactly. He didn't want a passenger. But he also did because he was like, he's ready. He, you know, he's like lived a big life already. Uh-huh. And he's ready to like travel and do a bunch of things. So he kind, he want, he needs someone. So this is putting this out there for people who are interested and I can set you up. Okay. Um, he is 20 to 60. He's just, he's just, did. And someone with purpose and has her own thing going on. He also wants to travel and stuff and want a partner. He isn't a little bit of a pickle here. Yeah. Yeah. But there's going to be someone for him. Well, he sounds very charming.

2:13:33He was. He got through to you. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. Extremely hard to do. Yes. I'm blown away by both parties. It was really fun. Okay. These are both wonderful stories. And I have a tiny one that's just not wonderful. It's just me telling them myself only because it just came up in an armchair anonymous. Oh, what? I wanted to tell you just because it was one of the more awkward things I've ever done. Oh, no. So this is back in Tennessee over the summer. Uh-huh. Delta had a friend flying in. Uh-huh. And that's a whole process. If an unaccompanied miner is flying. Oh, right. Yeah. So you got to go to the airport. You know, you got to, you declare yourself. They need all this information on you. Great. And you got to get there really early to get a, not a boarding pass, but a pass that can get you through security to get you to the gate, right? Yes. So I left the house and I was like, okay, I got to go pick up my high-flector 2000. That's my, that's your zapping instrument.

2:14:33And, and, and because it required signature, I had it delivered to Walgreens because I was afraid we wouldn't be home. Oh, smart. You ever do this? I don't. I hate signature. Just to everyone in the world. No more signatures. I agree. But okay. Did Delta go with you? No. Oh, it's just you. Okay. It was just me because it was ours, right? I was going to have to be there early then whatever. And she wouldn't have been able to come through the gate. Oh, she can. Right. So when I leave her in the lobby of the airport. So anyways, I leave my house and I, I'm on the edge of me being comfortable. I'm like, I got to get to the airport and check in. I want to make sure this little girl isn't getting off of a flight for a first time flying by herself and I'm not standing there. Yeah. So I'm a little stressed about that. I probably shouldn't have tried to pick up the thing. But I'm going to just turn left just a mile and then I'll be back on track. I go into the Walgreens and I say like, hey, I'm picking up a package. She's like, okay, the name. And I say, deck shepherd. And here's the address. And so she can't really find the box. But I can see the box. We're already in that situation.

2:15:34Okay. I'm like, I can't see that. But I think it might be that one, right? So she gets the box and then she comes up and I show her my license and it says my name on the box and she goes, okay, the tracking number. And I go, oh, I don't know the tracking number. And she's like, well, I can't give you this unless you have the tracking number. And I go, even though it says my name on there and I'm showing you my life, no. I go, okay, let me go out to the car to get my phone to see if I can find this tracking number. So I go out to the car, I get my phone. And you know, you would think it'd be easy to find it. It's not easy to find. I get so many emails from FedEx and UPS. I don't even know which carrier it's been sent by at this point. I'm going through forever. And now I'm starting to get like, oh, fuck, man, what if I can't find this? You know, I'm getting a little stressed. Finally, I find it. Great. Oh my gosh, I find it. And as I'm turning to show her the phone, she doesn't even look. She's like, okay. And then she grabs this tablet, right? And I'm already like, you didn't even look at the tracking number.

2:16:35I'm just like, we have to do that. Like what is this protocol? It doesn't make a ton of sense to me. And then she gets out this iPhone type thing to sign. And I go, okay, no problem. I sign and I go, I'm about to grab the package. And she goes, no, we got to initial some places. And then so she finds and then one of the places to do an initial, I do one of the initials. I go to grab the box and then she goes, hold on, we got more. And she's now she's scrolling through the thing. And I, I, I just kind of snapped. I go, it misses. I go, I go, I go. I love you, but I'm taking this box. I got to go. And I just grabbed my, I flexor. And I walk out and I get in the car and I go, I just said to her, I love you. But I have to take this box and I have to go. Okay. And I'm like, why? Why did I say that?

2:17:35Why did I say I love you? And then I was like, oh, it's because almost every time I have to, we get to that point with the kids. And I go, I love you, but we're not going to that restaurant at nine o'clock at night. It's always, I love you. And here's terrible news, right? And I'm so muscle memory. Just imagine you're hurt and I go, I love you, but I'm taking this package. Yeah, that's pretty wild. It's so weird. Although I do, I think a lot of people are used to hearing that. I love you. I love you, but. Oh, okay. So maybe to her, you cannot do that. Like I say that. I got to get to the air pump pick up as little girl, you know? Yeah, but, but I love you. I love you, but I got to go pick up this. I shipped in a little girl from another state. Wow. Yeah. Now, I have a question. So you pick up Delta's friend. Yes. And how is the car ride with you and this little girl just you two? Well, I know her so well now. She's around non-stop. Uh-huh. Yeah, so I know her really well. She's at our house non-stop and I drive her home. Well, Delta obviously always comes when I drive her home.

2:18:37Right. That's what I think. I'm putting myself in the position. Yes, I was for her. That did cross my mind like, oh, I got you got to ride with somebody's dad for 20 minutes. That was scare me. I was scared of getting dad when she was getting. I'm starting to get panic because I'm watching everyone come off this flight. And you know, often there's like, there's these huge gaps. Oh, I know. Because someone's can't get their bag out or whatever. So I keep thinking, oh my God, she's not on this flight. Now what am I going to do? Like I have five mini panics. Yeah. There was a huge gap and I'm certain I'm watching the last first thing out the plane. Then this long, long gap. And then I see her coming at me down the gangway with this flight attendant. Uh-huh. And she like looks at me and throws up like double pea signs. Oh, she's a gangster. She didn't care at all about flying on her own. We've also taken this, I think I took her to Disneyland with Delta on her birthday. And she's the one that wanted to ride the rides with Ryan and I over and over again. Like the ones that were too scary.

2:19:38She doesn't give a fuck. Okay. Well, I love that. Yes. So she was fine. We did. Good for her because I would be so scared to ride with someone's dad. Sure. Yeah. And like, what are we going to talk like? Do I have to talk to him? I already had prepared. Like I know she where she had been in that summer. I know who she's with. I know her family members. So I have many of questions to keep the ball rolling. Wow. The right home and it was a lovely ride home. And yeah, it wasn't awkward at all. Good. And when I was little, little, little, in middle school, I would go to my best friend Gina's house a lot. And her dad and mom were around a lot. But her dad picked us up a lot and he was still a very cool person, cool dad. And but like, yeah, I would be really quiet around her dad. And then he said once to Gina, he said, what's going on with Monica? She's so quiet. But then when she's in the room with you, like we can hear her, like she's like so exuberant

2:20:43and I was so embarrassed about that observation. And then made okay. And I didn't like that, you know, because I was like, well, now I don't know what to do. Like I guess I need to turn it down or turn it up. Yeah, I didn't turn it up on the dad side. I mean, over time, I'm going to end up knowing in my whole life. So like over time, he did get the foamy. Yeah, yeah. It was just hard to be like, don't talk to people, adults, you know? It'd be my preference. I'm never with a kid by myself. Yeah. I just, I would prefer to not be, you know? Yeah. Sure. I don't like, you know, there are times when I'm taking her home and maybe Delta's been told it's time to get ready for bed. And I always go, no, no, you're coming with me. I'm not going to be alone. Yeah, I just, I just, you know, I agree. It's just preferable to me that's one of my kids. He's always present if I'm with someone. Exactly. And I would imagine the parents would prefer that too as I would prefer that mom joins

2:21:44or the friend joins. Yeah. Yeah. So interesting. It really is. Okay, we do a fact. Okay, great. This is for Lizzo. Okay, some facts for Lizzo. Yes. Does Camarot still exist? And then you said in Mexico, maybe. Yeah. Three locations do remain worldwide. Okay. Miami. Oh, wow. But it's a small format store operating in a former garden center. So it's not old kind. Okay. Charlotte, Omelie, US Virgin Islands. Wonderful. That might even be worth me planning a vacation around. It says a larger department store. And then Guam. Guam. Also a larger department store. Great. But it says, for Camarot family. Yeah. I hate when things go on. No wonder. Yeah. Yeah. It sucks. I told you, I said that Camarot mansion was for sale. I think it's maybe even how that even came up. No, it didn't happen. Yeah. There's a mansion for sale and Michigan.

2:22:44Oh my God. I think maybe even Jack White owned it or some Detroit famous person owned it and bought it for like, I don't want to say 10 or 12 million dollars at one point. And then now it's for sale for like three seven or something. But it's this huge castle on like all this property. Why is it just declining in value? I think the same way these castles in England, they cost so much to keep off. They're just like, you know, they're everything is 120 years old inside. And it's all separated by concrete and stone. You know, I've seen easy to access. I just think it's a beat down to keep these things operational. Okay. Is Devils night only in Michigan? Yes. Using the specific name Devils night for the night before Halloween, October 30th is primarily a Michigan tradition, especially centered around Detroit, but says there are, while other places do not call it Devils night, many regions across the US and the UK have a similar night of pranks and minor vandalism.

2:23:45They use different local names. Miss Jeff night. Okay. Not as fun. That's common in New Jersey, parts in New York, Pennsylvania and parts of England. Goosey night. That's used in parts of New Jersey. Sounds like New Jersey. Well, we know New Jersey is. Cabbage night, common in upstate New York and parts of New England. Gate night used in places like Bay City, Michigan. Oh, okay. Bay City. And then beggars night, observed in areas like Des Moines, Iowa. I got to say we have the coolest name for it. Devils night. It's like cut to the chase. Yeah. Goosey night is silly goose or pinch people's butts. Why? You call goosey in someone. You do? Yeah, like it feels like a goose bit your butt. You never grew up or hearing that. My mom always says it. Oh, she did. Yeah, then he goosey. Oh. Yeah. Or you can say goose the throbs too. I think pinching butts is out of favor.

2:24:47Like it's very cute. I think it was an 80s thing. It was huge in my junior high in element trade. I should go home. So 90s, 90s. Yeah. Like no one was doing that. And I just love how is that my locker? And so I felt someone pinched my butt. My turn was one of the rascals. And I loved it. It was so fun. I know. I just don't think it's in anymore. I don't think you're allowed to touch. You grab anyone anymore. Well, if they're your boyfriend or girlfriend. Sure. Sure. But even that, I'm saying I don't think is like a thing. Delta does a lot of pinching with her friends. Well, she got that from you. But she didn't. Oh. I think you did. OK, I was looking up some urban legends because we talk about urban legends. Now, what do you want to hear? Do you want to hear 50 of the spookiest urban legends from every state? We go pick some states. Just a list of urban legends, that sounds dumb. But then the others are like from a long time. I want to do this one. OK, it's from readers digest.

2:25:48Ooh, bless when the past came. Aren't readers digest. Exactly. Urban legends. OK, do you want to pick a state? Yeah, I do. I want to pick Florida. OK. I mean, we should probably save that to last, but. OK, ready? Yeah. Florida is Captain Tonys. Since 1852, Captain Tonys, the oldest saloon in Key West, has been known to be haunted. Doors slam for no apparent reason, and there are inexplicable banging noises and frequent ghostly visitations. But why? Well, the building itself has a long and storied history. One that includes being built around a tree that the town wants use for hanging, E. And for being the side of the town's original morgue. Many died around that tree, including a young woman who allegedly murdered her husband and two sons. She was hanged in a blue dress, covered in blood, and she hasn't left the scene appearing to patrons as the lady in blue. Oh, wow. So there's no other ghost story than urban legends. Yeah, I think these are those ghost stories. It says urban legends. But let's look at me. Do Georgia. OK, yeah. Because let's see if we know. Yeah, wait for a hot dog or a Pepsi bottle or a vacuum cleaner.

2:26:53Uh-oh, I don't know this. Georgia, the song of the cell. OK. As urban legend goes, in 1848, Elic and his wife, Betsy. Was this going to be in Savannah? Probably, yeah. Both enslaved people. OK, bad start. Yeah. God, Georgia. Oh, yeah. We're in their home one night when they're, this is a bad, this is bad. They're master. Yes. We're in their home one night when their master, drunken, belligerent, crashed through the door. He attempted to attack Betsy, but Elic fought him off. Undeterred the master. I hate saying that. The master chased Elic up a ladder into a loft. As the struggle continued, the master losses, bounds fell out of the loft and died. I don't, I can't say I miss him. Even though Elic turned himself into the sheriff the next morning, explaining that what had happened was self defense. He was still charged with murder. Oh, boy. A common occurrence in the Antebellum South. Elic was imprisoned in the old Lawrenceville jail. Lawrenceville's near me. And later, and later executed unjustly

2:27:56for the crime, people say they can still hear his sorrowful song through the walls of the old jail. This is horrible. Yeah, these are, these are like ghost stories. All right, let's look at Michigan. I hated that. Thank you. And I'm disappointed. Yeah, the man, the word master, you know, it was, it has so many different meanings and applications. And then this one, uh, gross one. And it's got the power to take down the word entirely. Like they've dumped it from master bedroom. I know. You got master cylinder. You got, uh, you know, but what if you're a master master class? You hear my master, right? Master painter. Yeah. That's. That was a funny joke. Okay. Ready Michigan. Yeah. But what about people like that are masters at things? Don't you feel bad for them a little bit? No. Because that was a good distinction. I know, but he's a master carpenter or she's a master sale. I think you just say expert like we do. Okay. All right. What have this had been called armchair master? No. Why would not be allowed that? Okay.

2:28:56Ready Michigan, the name Rouge. Ever heard of it? Well, we have the river Rouge, which is red, right? In French. Mm hmm. Do you know what name is? No. It's dwarf. The red dwarf? Yeah. Oh my goodness. This is one of the urban legends still recognize today and is celebrated by the people of Detroit every year. They say there's a, they say there's a devilish creature known as the name Rouge, French for red dwarf, who causes mayhem in the city. Small and red. This is devil's night probably. Small and red with a piercing, cacklish laugh. He's thought to be seen when disaster is about to strike and is even said to be the reason for the Cadillac companies downfall in the city. Oh, wow. Okay. Well, is he driving industry out of the city? I guess he hates the city. He's a rescue. Yeah, he's a devil. Yeah. Okay. Well, those weren't really urban legends. Not as we normally think of them. That was annoying. Now, a couple though, Bloody Mary, we all know Bloody Mary.

2:29:57Do you know Bloody Mary? You don't know Bloody Mary? Where you can't say it in the mirror. A famous mirror ritual we're chanting and name multiple times in a dark room summons of vengeful spirit. I once had a sleepover and invited my friend and told her about this and she had to go home. Oh, God. You spoke to her that much. Oops. The hook handed killer. A cautionary tale about a maniac with a prosthetic hook attacking young couples parked in secluded areas. I think I've heard that one. Yeah. Started by the moral majority to prevent. I definitely heard of this one. Okay. The lick tan. A story about a girl who thinks her dog is looking her hand at night only to find the animal murdered and intruder under her bed. I've heard this. Oh, that feels familiar. Yeah. Again, like I was saying, the expert that was telling us about it is like it's these weird details that end up being sticky. So it's like licking the hand. Right. That's what makes it memorable. The small coffin with the note. I know. That's your face. Yeah. Like, why would he, where would one get a, he's a woodworker?

2:30:59He made a miniature coffin. Oh, Slender Man. I brought it back. Oh, yeah, yeah. I saw a doc on that. Yeah, me too. Okay. Now, can you catch things from a public toilet seat? You are extremely unlikely to catch an infection or sexually transmitted disease from sitting on a toilet seat. Yeah. I know. That was what we already said. Okay. It says fragile germs. Most bacteria and viruses that cause STDs or illnesses die very quickly when they leave the human body and hit a dry, hard surface. Healthy skin acts as a strong protective shield against germs to get sick live germs from the seat when you did directly enter an open wound or your mucus membranes, which is rare from simply sitting down. Also, no. Because what if you never got in your vagina on the edge of the seat? I guarantee people have gotten their vagina on the seat. Have you? I hover. But a lot of people sit and I can see what if they kind of fall and then they sit and then they... Well, you'd have to sit on the corner of the toilet to accomplish this.

2:32:02No. And then let's just do the math. Yeah. You got to like side saddle the seat, which is insane. I just don't see that happening. Additionally, the person before you had to side saddle it to get the SCD on that area of the toilet. That side saddle... Okay, let's say... For the listener, Monica's pointing at the little one where... This is the toilet seat. Yeah, the you. Uh-huh. So, okay. The outside of your cheeks go on... No, I'm a good buttony. Yeah. Ah! Now, because you would have put your butt cheek in the big hole and you would have fallen over to the side into the water. No, I can't. Look, okay. I know. So if you're hovering, you're hovering. You're gonna have been touching the front where there's no seat. And again... No, the seats... Look at it. I'm gonna take a picture. I'm interested in why you're incentivized for SCDs to be contagious on toilet seats. I'm not. I'm just trying to talk things through. Okay. As a woman who sits on toilet seats and you're a man... Well, you just told me that you hover, but...

2:33:02I mean, I have mine, I sit. Like, you're a man, you stand. Yeah. So, not when I go over to... Who could go? Right. So, but that's different. Okay. So also, it does say toilet... What you might actually encounter gut bacteria. Yeah, yeah, okay. Toilets, he's gonna curious mom amounts of bacteria like E. coli or strap. Disgusting. Okay. Can you get an SCD from a hot tub? You cannot. From just sitting in or soaking in the water of a hot tub. Yeah. Unless you're married. They die very... Oh. It's such a good job. They die very quickly outside the human body. And there's chlorine. It says you do not catch an SCD from the water itself. You'd have to be sliding down the handrail. Ew. Oh. So you're saying you could... If you slid down and so on else it just slid down. People have done that for sure and they're doing... Now in there, Virginia would rip it apart. You know that. Even your drunk estate, you would never think it was a good idea.

2:34:04Job dog bun, the handrail. I wouldn't. But I've been around so many people who are drunk and then they're trying to impress boys and then the boy size down. I'm like, I'll be fun. And then they do that. Okay. Okay. What does Joel Olstein own? Ooh. What does Joel Olstein own? Great. A 17,000 square foot mansion in Houston, Texas. Value that approximately $10.5 million to $14 million. His net worth is estimated between 50 million and 100 million. He does not take a salary from Lakewood Church. His wealth comes from best selling book royalties, beaking engagements and media projects. So he, his mega church purchased and moved into the compact center originally known as the summit in Houston, Texas, arena that was the home of the Houston Rockets. Did he ever own the Charlotte arena? Was he there? Oh, wow.

2:35:05So there's another mega church owner that has the Charlotte arena. Okay. Unfortunately, you were wrong in run DMC. They wore adidas, not feelers. Makes sense. They did have a song about it. Yeah. Wonder who wore feelers. Well, Lizzot did. Okay. How to pronounce Flutus, Floutist. So it's based on region kind of. Chef's choice. British English is Flotist. American English is Floutist. The Flautist is also used. And it says the more common North American alternative pronounced Flutist. So I guess any, but I would say Floutist. I'm going to stick with Floutist. Yeah. Because it took me the longest to learn. You can't unlearn that. Okay. Now we talked about morning becomes eclectic. And you said the guy that runs it, like, ended up doing a lot of stuff for. Music supervision. Was it Tom Schnabel or Schnabel?

2:36:07He was the shows originator. I know the person I'm talking about did some music placement on parenthood. And I'm embarrassed. I don't know. Would you know what if I said it? It Chris Doritos. Doritos. It really sounds like that. That's so. Could have been in Chris Doritos. Nick Hardcore. Nick Hardcore. Jason Bentley. I'm really sorry. I'm not going to. And Liz. Novena Carmel and Anthony Validus. So lots of people were programming, I guess. Well, these are over the course of time. Yeah. But if you were, if it was parenthood, that would have been. He's in 2012. That would have been Jason Bentley. Okay. That sounds right. Yeah. I'm trying to remember Larry telling me his name 14 years ago. And I just don't have it. I understand. Okay. What's a Colorado?

2:37:07Mimosa often called a colomosa. Hard cider based twist on the classic champagne cocktail made by mixing traditional hard cider with fresh orange and lime juice. Yummy. Okay. The top most viewed tiny desks concerts, because you said Anderson Pax was the biggest ever. You were just saying words. Yeah. Do a leapa is the biggest 142 million views. Walsers. Then Mac Miller, 137 million, then Anderson Pax. At what? 118 million. Okay. Let's get Anderson up there to the top of the leaderboard. Well, also Liz, a member she said she has a... Yeah, Walsers. Underwatched. Yeah, Walsers first, but also let's get Anderson in the number one slot. All right. Mac Miller, that was my introduction. Yeah. Somehow, and, you know, as I told the story. How do you desk is so great. It's so cool. Good for them, man. I know.

2:38:07Found... I found a Fila. Two-pock warfields. Two-packs and some Fila's. Okay. That's cool. And he's in front of a Jaguar XJS. Yeah. It was for an insert of one of his albums. He more of them. It was Grant Hill sneakers. Detroit Ding Ding Ding. What a player, Grant Hill. Always let the league in triple doubles. Something just happened with two-pock. His murder was convicted yesterday or the day before. Wow. Some 18 years later, whatever it was. Wild. Just think about having murdered someone and you've gotten away with it for like a decade. When do you start thinking like, well, I guess I'm probably... Yeah. Breathe. I think for 14 years in, I would be like, I guess I got away with it. Yeah, definitely. Yeah. Whoa. Can never get comfy. That's the one of the... Scaring. Prices you pay for me in a murderous... What? Or us, your life, you're like, am I going to prison? Yeah.

2:39:08Do you think they like it kind of like what happened with Steve, the pool? Like, they kind of get off on like... Well, you know what? I have a little bit of a moral conundrum. Sometimes these people get brought to justice like 30 years after the fact you read about them. I know. I mean, in 82 years, getting sentenced to life, I kind of don't like it. I'm like, well, obviously they didn't kill a bunch more people or do a bunch more. Well, I must say, did like Robert Durst. Yeah, for sure. So I agree. If it's like a one and a... But it's still like... It's just like, well, fuck, they were already out for 30 years and it caused any more wreckage. Do we really need to now spend money to make an old person die in jail? It gets tricky for me. It is tricky. I wouldn't... It wouldn't be tricky for me. It's like a one that was hurt. Exactly. But, although... Me and outside of that dynamic, I just go like, what's this all about? What's the point of this? So that this guy can die in jail. It depends also on the crime.

2:40:09Yeah. I think, maybe. I don't know. Yeah. Not saying anything, but just... Okay, I'm not going to say anything. Um... What do you want to tell me in common? No, because you'll be mad. It could be a spoiler. Oh, okay. Okay. Oh wow. You know about a core case. I don't know about that. Um... All right. Well, that's it. That was everything for Lizzo? Yes. Great episode. Well, time coming. I'm glad we got her. Me too. So fun. All right. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you.