Making Healthy Choices with Valerie Friedlander

In this episode of The Art of Imperfect Adulting, Amy Stone speaks with Chicago-based Valerie Friedlander about how intentional choices, including something as small as changing the music you listen to, can lead to major life shifts. Valerie opens up about her journey from family dynamics shaped by addiction, to her self-awareness breakthroughs in college, and her long-standing love affair with music as a tool for emotional processing and personal growth.

About the Guest:

Valerie Friedlander is a certified life coach, podcast host of Mindset Unlimited, and lifelong Chicagoan with deep roots in music, creativity, and self-development. Valerie is passionate about supporting women through life and career transitions, helping them unpack old patterns and create empowered, intentional lives. She offers coaching, workshops, and a powerful Energy Leadership Index assessment.

Main Topics Covered:

• Valerie’s roots in Chicago and her family’s musical legacy.
• The ripple effect of growing up in a family impacted by addiction and recovery.
• Why music is both an emotional touchstone and a tool for moving through difficult feelings.
• Valerie’s “epiphany moment” realizing she could make different choices about the soundtrack of her life—and what that symbolized for bigger life changes.
• The importance of intentionality, pausing before responding, and recognizing where we do (and don’t) have agency.
• Navigating relationships, boundaries, and self-awareness from college through adulthood.
• Playlists, parenting, technology, and evolving ways to connect with others.
• The distinction between self-reflection for growth and unhelpful self-judgment about past choices.
• How Valerie brings these insights to her coaching practice.

Quote from the Episode:

“I can choose what I resonate with and what serves me... I can choose not to stay there. I can choose to do things that allow me more room in my experience.” — Valerie Friedlander

Timestamps: [00:00:06] Introductions, Chicago roots, and indigenous land acknowledgments

[00:02:17] Valerie's love of celebrating with food and cake-making adventures

[00:04:03] How music—and Amy Mann’s “Magnolia” soundtrack—became the soundtrack to a pivotal life shift

[00:13:48] College, codependency, family recovery, and the toolbox of self-help

[00:20:50] The power of self-awareness and talking it out loud

[00:32:38] Navigating relationships with pause, consent, and intention

[00:40:27] Curating music, playlists, and the power of intentional emotional shifts

[00:44:27] Self-reflection, choices, and patterns across adulting

[00:55:24] Valerie’s coaching philosophy and how to connect

[00:57:38] Final fun questions: movement, research, and connection styles

Special Offer from the Guest:

The Energy Leadership™ Index (ELI) Assessment. Normally $375. Use the code IMPERFECT for 60% off. https://valeriefriedlander.com/AdultingELI

Note from the show: Guest offers are almost always limited-time and limited quantity. If you have any trouble redeeming the offer please reach out directly to the guest for support.

ABOUT THE SHOW: The Art of Imperfect Adulting elevates the voices of experience by sharing real stories from real people figuring out adult life. Every episode features honest conversations about life's choices, changes, and challenges—interviews with individuals (not celebrities) who share their personal experiences and insights. Through these authentic stories, listeners find validation, motivation, and inspiration for navigating their own path through modern life. Because there's a big difference between expert advice and shared experience, and hearing another person's lived experience helps us feel less alone in our own situations.

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