Mike Friday: Rugby Is What You Do, Not Who You Are

What does it really mean to build a winning culture in sports? Few coaches can answer this question with the depth and global perspective of Mike Friday, international rugby sevens coach whose 25-year journey has taken him from England to Kenya to a decade with USA Rugby.

"Culture is a group of individuals that have alignment in the way they go about their business," Friday explains with refreshing simplicity. But beneath this straightforward definition lies a profound coaching philosophy centered on human connection. Friday draws a crucial distinction between kindness and niceness – you can deliver hard truths without sugar-coating, provided there's genuine care behind your words.

Friday's transformation of underdog teams reveals his talent for adaptation. When he took over Kenya's program, he arrived to find "a bag of balls and cones and 20 Kenyans that were late to training" in long grass. With USA Rugby, he inherited a team given just a 10% chance of Olympic qualification. In both cases, Friday's approach wasn't to impose his system but to understand the cultural contexts and individual needs of his players. "You mold yourself around the team, you don't mold the team around you," he shares, challenging conventional coaching wisdom.

Perhaps most powerful is Friday's perspective on success beyond trophies. "Rugby is what you do, not who you are," he emphasizes, a mantra that kept both him and his players grounded through victories and defeats. This philosophy proved especially valuable when coaching players from diverse backgrounds – from Kenyan athletes who had never experienced unconditional support to American players from wildly different cultural contexts.

Whether you're a coach, leader, or simply someone interested in human potential, Friday's insights offer a masterclass in communication, resilience, and perspective that transcends sport. His parting reflection captures it perfectly: "I'm proud of what we did, but I'm more proud of what the players became."

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