No Moving Parts - Murray F Yaco

0:00No Moving Parts by Murray F. Yacco Hanson was sitting at the control board in the single building on communications of Relay Station 43.4 SC when the emergency light flashed on for the first time in 200 years. With textbook recommended swiftness, he located the position of the ship sending the call, identifying the ship and the name of its captain and made contact. This is Hanson on 43.4 SC put me through to Captain Fromer. Fromer here said an incredible deep voice. What the devil do you want? What do I want? Ask the astonished Hanson. It was you, sir, who sent the emergency call. I did know such thing, said Fromer with great certainty. But the light flashed.

1:00How long have you been out of school, Fromer asked? Almost a year, sir, but that doesn't change the fact that you're imagining things and now that you've been sitting on that asteroid hoping that something would happen to break the monotony. Now, leave me the hell alone or I'll put you on report. Now look here, Hanson began, practically beside himself with frustration. I saw that emergency light the one. Maybe it was activated automatically when something went out of order on your ship. I don't allow emergencies on the Euclid Queen, said Fromer with growing anger. Now if you don't, Hanson spared himself the indignity of being cut off. He broke contact himself. He sighed, reached for the book entitled Emergency Procedure Rules and settled back in his chair. 15 minutes later, the emergency light flashed on for the second time in 200 years.

2:03With its red glow illuminating his freckled excited face, Hanson triumphantly placed another call to the Euclid Queen. This is Hanson on 43.4 SC. Let me speak to Captain Fromer, please. Or the Captain has asked me to contact you. I'm the navigator. I was just about to call you. We have a small problem that I'll speak to the Captain, Hanson repeated crimly. Now see here, I'm perfectly capable of handling this situation. Actually, it's hardly even an emergency. You were, it seems, signal automatically when. If you'll check your emergency procedures, Hanson said holding his thumb in the rulebook, you'll know that the relay station attended contacts to Captain personally during all emergencies. Of course, if you want to violate, look, oh man, said the navigator now sounding on the

3:06verge of tears, tried to realize the spot I'm in. Fromer has ordered me to handle this thing without his assistance. He seems to feel that you have a grudge of some kind. If you don't put me in touch with Captain Fromer in five minutes, I'll put through a call to sector headquarters. Hanson's signal off contact. If he knew nothing else about the situation, he knew that he had the upper hand. Five minutes later, Captain Fromer called him back. I am calling an accordance with emergency procedures. Fromer said between clenched teeth. The situation is this. We are reporting an emergency. What class emergency? Hanson interrupt me. Yes, yes, Fromer, obviously caught off guard. Yes, Captain, there are three classes of emergency.

4:08Major class, which would include death and injury. Mechanical class, including malfunction of Heggler units and such. And general class. Yes, yes, of course, general class, by all means, Fromer said hurriedly. You see, it's hardly even an emergency. Just what is the nature of your trouble, Captain? Why, well, it seems that we were doing a preliminary landing procedure check. And yes, go on. Well, why, it seems we can't get the door open. It was Hanson's turn to be taken aback. You're pulling my legs, sir. I most certainly am not. Captain Fromer said emphatically, you really mean that you can't open the door? I'm afraid so. Something's wrong with the mechanism. Our technical staff has never encountered a problem like this. And they advise me that any attempt at repair might possibly result in the opposite situation.

5:15You mean not being able to get the door closed? Precisely. In other words, we can't land. I see. Then I'm afraid there's nothing I can do, except advise sector headquarters to send an emergency repair crew. Captain Fromer said, I'm afraid so too. How long will it take for a message to get there with your transmitting equipment? Two days, Captain. At a guess, there'll be a ship alongside within the week. Will be maintaining your present position, I assume? Oh, we'll be here, all right. Fromer said bitterly. Then he cut contact. As the single occupant of a large asteroid with nothing but time and boredom on his hands, Hanson was enjoying the whole situation immensely. He allowed himself the luxury of several dozen fatacies in which his name was mentioned prominently in galaxy-wide reports of the episode.

6:18He imagined that Captain Fromer was also creating vivid accounts of quite another sort that would soon be amusing several hundred billion news-hungry citizens of the Federation. When the repair ship arrived, it came to Hanson's astonishment to the asteroid and not alongside Fromer's ship. He soon found out that there was someone else who shared the captain's embarrassment. I'm Bollard, said a tall, thin, mournful man. Might have I sit? Help yourself. Hanson waved a hand toward the meager accommodations. He had no idea why a senior engineer was being so deferential, but he enjoyed the feeling of power. You're probably wondering about a lot of things, Bollard began sadly. Frankly, we don't have any ideas about how we can fix Captain Fromer's door. He waited to let that sink in. Then he continued.

7:20It took us three days back at the base to find out that when these ships were built almost 500 years ago, nobody bothered to include detailed drawings of the door mechanism. But why? You certainly know how to build. We know how to build Star-class ship. Sure. We built a few in the past century or two. There's never been a need for replacement, drilling. These ships are designed to last forever. The original fleet was conceived to fill the system's needs for a full thousand years. But the doors on the few ships that have been built, how the ships we built were exact duplicates of Captain Fromer's ship, except for the door. It's long-faced, radiated despair. No one ever questioned why the door mechanism wasn't included in the original plans. We simply designed another type, a different type of door. Well, certainly you can find out how this particular door works, can't you?

8:24I hope so, Bollard said, ringing his hands. But we have a couple of other problems. Number one, Captain Fromer has an extremely important passenger on board. None other than his exalted exalency, our thagna bar, he is, or was, on his way home after concluding a treaty of friendship with the president of the Federation. Hanson managed a whistle. Furthermore, Bollard continued, his exalency has to be home soon to get there in time for the mating season. This occurs once in a lifetime, I'm told, and this is his only chance to continue the ancestral rule. Wait a minute, Hanson said. Are you trying to say that you can't solve a simple problem like getting him home and getting him out of the ship? You can always cut it in two, can't you? These ships were made to last forever, Bollard explained. The hull is, of course, pseudo-met.

9:27But not the kind of pseudo-met used for other applications. In short, about the only way you'll get in that ship is to vaporize it. But can't you simply disassemble a door mechanism? My God, how complicated can it be? We're going to try to do just that, Bollard said without a trace of confidence. As far as the complication goes, let me say just this. This is full of moving parts. Where are you getting at, Hanson asked. Just this. These ships are perfect mechanisms. There is hardly anything in them that could be called the moving part. Now a door has to open and close. Sure we devised a simple safe way to do it a few hundred years after the original fleet was built. The men who designed the original door mechanism felt perhaps that it was incongruous to include it in the first place. Maybe that's why they threw away the plans.

10:30God knows it is incongruous. Look, here's a photo we took of one in a ship back to face. Hanson scanned the photograph. It was a meaningless jumble. A handed it back. Well, make yourself at home. I'm afraid that the only thing I can help with will be radio communication to Captain Frommership. Good enough, Bollard said. I'm expecting someone else tomorrow. After you bring him down, feel free to drop over and see me anytime. Bollard went back to his ship, Hanson went to bed. He dreamed of his exalted exalency, or Thagnabar, growing angrier day by day as the time of mating came closer. In his dream, he suddenly came upon a magnificent solution to the problem, a solution involving a telepathic system of fertilization. He woke up before he had completely worked out the details.

11:31Bollard's friend arrived the same morning. He was a small, dark, active little man whom Hanson immediately disliked. Meet Dr. Chemus, Bollard said when Hanson dropped in on him. Dr. Chemus is a specialist in the history of technology. He thinks he knows how our cute little door mechanism is made. I can't say for sure, Chemus said, but I guess that those components are made of metal, real metal. I thought metal was used only in jewelry, Hanson said. Dr. Chemus grins slightly. That's what most people think. Actually, refined metal of various types was used in large masses, foreign masses, for thousands of years. Historically speaking, the pseudomets are relatively new. It's difficult to imagine metal functioning as machinery, Hanson news. You say that this door mechanism has moving parts?

12:33Lots of them? The main parts are nothing to be afraid of. Chemus said, here, look at this. He put something small on the table, much in the manner of a young boy dropping a garter snake in the midst of the schoolgirls. Bollard and Hanson crowded around. Now, take turns, said Chemus sharply, and don't drop it. It's priceless, I assure you. The ancient wristwatch, with its transparent back, was passed from hand to hand. It's a little monster, isn't it, Bullard said. Those small round wheels are called Gears, elucidated Chemus. One gear turns another, which turns another, and so on. I'd rather imagine that your door is operated on some similar principle. I seem to be the one who asked all the schoolboy questions Hanson began. But somebody tell me why Captain Frammer doesn't take his ex-aluncy to his home planet,

13:35land the ship, and then let his technical staff tear off the door mechanism. We've gone through that, Bullard said, we're late. Unfortunately, we need special tools, and there's no way to get them into the ship. Can I speak to Captain Frammer, Chemus, right away, Hanson said. He pressed his hand in various patterns on his belt. This is Hanson. Let us talk to Captain Frammer, please. Frammer here, who is it? Dr. Chemus speaking, how is your passenger? My passenger is fine, but he keeps telling me that he is very anxious to plant his seed. When can you get us out of here? Plant his seed, the Chemus. There's nothing salacious about this. I'd been assured. He simply has a biological craving at this time in his life to plant his seed. I've got problems like that too, Bullard said, but I don't go around telling everybody.

14:40Stop clowning Frammer's net. You guys better find a way to fix this damn door, or you'll have a galactic war on your hands. Anybody have any ideas yet? We're sure that the door mechanism is made of metal, Chemus said. The construction is probably based on the principle of a worm gear. A what? A worm gear, Captain. Chemus said patiently, it's an ancient metal device that was sometimes used for closing large doors. There's also the possibility that the door is closed and opened by dogs. These seem to have been used at least to operate doors of undersea crafts, although we're not quite certain about the function of dogs. The captain maintained his stony silence. Also Chemus continued, we have on earth, so to speak, a reference to a metal component called a rabbit. Now see here, Captain Frammer roared. Who do you think you're kidding with this talk about worms and dogs and rabbits?

15:45Babbits, Captain Babbits, perhaps a type of bearing? Anyway, we're at work on the problem. I assure you. This is a very serious motion to Hanson that he was through talking. During the next three days, Hanson twice visited Fullard and Chemus. On each occasion, he found the two men in translike conditions, ostensibly thinking through the problem that they had been assigned to solve. But more probably, Hanson guessed, brooding about the reaction of sector headquarters to their daily progress reports, which Hanson had been relaying for them. Hanson had only sympathy for the people back at sector headquarters. For if these two experts were the galaxies two top trouble shooters, the federation was not, as Hanson put it to himself, in very good shape to fight a war with 100 billion enraged citizens who worshipped his exalted exotlency, our thagna bar almost as much as it

16:53is seen. Hanson went back to his reading, only to be interrupted with increasing frequency by messy transmissions from an increasingly alarmed sector headquarters. Messages were address to Fullard, and were bravely designed to disguise the center's hysteria. While at the same time urging Fullard on to more magnificent efforts. A few messages, fairly representative of the state of affairs as time wore on, reflected an increasing suspicion on the part of sector headquarters that Chemus and Fullard, although certainly tops in their fields, were not tops enough. Sec headquarters, Fullard, Com Relay, 43.4 SC. President would like estimate of when door will be open. You sure you can handle? Emphasize that political situation now getting touchy, repeat touchy.

17:56Our thagna bar calling on President today to make demand that seed be planted on time. Sure you don't need more help. Commanding General. Commanding General. No help needed. Making progress for sure, President. Today found out metal in mechanism is very hard and constant radio touch with Fromber. Passengers impatient but quieter. Sleeps more now. This significant? Times developing theory of mechanism says we'll take time to work out. How much time we have, when was seed be planted? Fullard. Sec headquarters, Fullard, Com Relay, 43.4 SC. Must have estimate when door opens. This is an order.

18:59Ambassador threatening war. Can't give deadline of seed planting time since subject very taboo. Our biologists say our thagna bar is sleepy significant. Maybe prelude to seeding time. Tell about chemo-story in next communication. We'll evaluate here. Nice to know metal is hard. Keep up good work. Pressure here to send you help. It says whole federation praying for door to be fixed. Says to hurry up. Commanding General. Commanding General. No estimate possible. Chemistry almost complete. States that mechanism built on principle of worm gear. Repeat. Worm gear. Today instructed Fromber's crew to jiggle moving parts of mechanism at random. Parts would not jiggle. Fullard states that our thagna bar sleeps all time and color changes to blue and red

19:59on stomach. This significant. Fullard. Sec headquarters, Fullard, Com Relay, 43.4 SC. Important you amplify last message. Red and blue on stomach. Why our thagna bar undressed? Investigate. Order's help sent. Help on way. Repeat. Why our thagna bar undressed? Commanding General. Commanding General. Fromber advises tell you ship's position has put our thagna bar in refrigerator, chemos. Sec headquarters, chemos. Com Relay, 43.4 SC. Take out of refrigerator. This is an order. Why undressed? Commanding General.

21:00Commanding General. Fullard making model of my drawings ready soon. Our thagna bar out of refrigerator as requested. But ship's position very angry and wants to put back in color on stomach, pink and yellow with blue squares. This significant. Chemos. That went on like this for several more days. Hanson at first amused was now alarmed and completely convinced that both chemos and bullard were thoroughly useless. The messages were his only source of information since both experts were too immersed in their work to talk with them. As his alarm grew, he decided that he might at least try to strike up a friendship with someone on board captain fromers sealed ship, someone who might have something comforting to report. He called up the ship's navigator. This is Hanson. How are things going up there?

22:02Ah, what's that mean? Good or bad? It means the navigator said while yawning that things are falling apart rapidly. In fact, in a day or two, I don't think it will make much difference whether or not they open that damn door. You, uh, Charter Filmin? Why not? Said the navigator with the voice of a man who knows that it is too late for anything to matter. The members of the crew are divided into two factions. It appears that our position has rallied half the crew to support his medical contention that our exalted passenger belongs in the refrigerator. The good captain, with some justice, one must admit, thinks that he is in command of the ship and prefers to believe that our thangna bar belongs out of the refrigerator. Who seems to be winning the argument? Argument? There's no argument, old man. It's open warfare.

23:04No weapons aboard, of course, but the two teens are grappling up and down the corridors and shuddling our exalted passenger in and out of the ice-fucks about four times each hour. Quite a sight, really. Right now he's in the refrigerator, but the other team... Let me know who's ahead from time to time, will you? Hanson heard himself say. Glad to oblige, the navigator said, yawning again. Oh, incidentally, have they sent for help yet? Hanson said with some surprise, why, yes. As a matter of fact, sector headquarters is sending some help. How did you know? Found a happen sooner or later, old man. When the going gets really tough, they always get around to sending a gypsy. Only way to get anything done, you know. I don't know, Hanson said reluctantly. Why is it that everyone knows except me? What please is a gypsy? You're too young to know everything old man, the navigator said.

24:08You're especially too young to know about one of the federation's best kept secrets. But you might as well, I suppose. The fact is that a gypsy is a generally vagrant, dirty, feeding, clever scoundrel who will not work, who has absolutely no respect for authority, who believes that our institutions are iffy and why. Patients, patients, causing the navigator to be hardly. If I have to reveal everything I know, I must do it in my own way. The description I just gave you is not necessarily true. It is simply the way that sector headquarters deals about gypsies. Common jealousy, really. It seems that from time to time, our perfect little galactic society spawns men who don't

25:08care to be cast in the common mold. In short, there are a few men around with brains who don't think that it means very much the way we're pretty uniforms or fancy titles. Times like yours, Anson S., precisely the navigator said sadly. The truth of the matter is, of course, that I only play it being an navigator. I couldn't get this ship off course if I tried. The same is true with the four engineering officers who stand around watching the Hegler Drive units. They occasionally make a ceremonial adjustment, but beyond that, they simply stand around looking pretty. No moving parts, Anson said. No moving brains if you like. Anyway, a gypsy has somewhere along the line learned how to do things. They'll take an emergency call about once a year if they happen to feel like it.

26:10Then they charge about half a million credits. You mean they have an organization? Standard rates and habits? No, the navigator said. They hate anything that smells like organization. They don't even specialize in any certain kind of work. One year they'll be fascinated by sub-nucleonics. The next by horse racing. Very erratic. Can't keep attention on any one thing. Hard of one wants to engage in fishing and alcohol drinking. Brilliant mathematician too. But he'd only take a call once every three years or so. For a half million credits a crack, you could live pretty well for three years on that. Strangely enough, the navigator said thoughtfully. They don't really have any interest in money. If you'd ever met one, you'd know that the high fee is sort of a penalty. They meet out to everyone else for being so dumb.

27:12Well, one thing for sure Hanson said. If Bollard and Chemus are the cream of the crop, I'm on the side of the gypsies. Ah, youth and navigator said. I too once had such dreams. We'll see about the dreams Hanson said almost menacingly. I didn't spend six years in that damn school just to sit around in a pretty uniform for the rest of my life. Oh, you'll get used to it. In fact, you'll like it after a while. The home leads. The fuss your friends will make over you when you step off the ship. The regular and automatic promotion in grade with the extra gold band-editeers sleeve. The move from one outpost to an always larger installation. You'll never do much, of course. But why should you? After all, there aren't any moving parts. Hanson cut the communicator off. He stood there for a moment, feeling depressed and betrayed.

28:14Automatically he reached down and flicked imaginary dust from his blue sleeve with its narrow solitary gold band. Ten minutes later, the gypsies shipped signal for landing. The man who walked into Hanson's control room was hardly the ogre he had been prepared for. He looked, Hanson was later replied, like Santa Claus with muscles in place of the fat, bearing an almost unheard of beard and dressed in rough clothes, he walked across the room and made short work of the usual formalities. Names Candle, said the man. Where's those two phonies I'm supposed to replace? You'll have to go suit up and go back through the airlock, Hanson said, motion to the door. They're in their ship. It's the one next to yours. What me to tell them, you're on your way over? Hell knows it, Candle grinning. I'll surprise him. Now, suppose you and me sit down and have a little chat. They sat and Candle pumped Hanson of everything he knew about the entire situation.

29:18An hour later, Hanson felt almost as if he'd been had. Is that all? He asked, weirdly. I got the facts, Candle said. Now let's go throw those experts out. It wasn't quite that simple. Neither Bullard nor Chemos had any intention of simply clearing out. Who the hell you think you are, Bullard said, to come on over here and order us off. We didn't even ask for help. And God knows you couldn't supply it anyway. Bullard, with evident distaste, ran his eyes up and down Candle's clothing. Dr. Chemos had some ideas too. Letter of authority or no letter of authority, Chemos said. Pointing a manicured forefinger at the paper and Candle's hand, you'll ruin everything. You have no idea what you're up against. We spent weeks working this thing out. Candle grinning. What have you worked out?

30:19Why? Why we know that this is a metal, double, enveloping worm gear. Wrong, Candle said. It's a single enveloping worm gear. It's made of steel, with an aluminum alloy wheel gear, and the two parts have corroded and stuck. The whole mechanism was originally designed for submarines. Chemos started to say something, then turned and looked at Bullard for reassurance. He's crazy, Bullard said. He's making it up as he goes along. How can he possibly know what he's talking about? Why? There haven't been any submarines for centuries. I'm tired of playing games, Candle said, no longer grinning. The boy and I have work to do. You two are in the way. You'll only take up time if I have to work with you and show you what to do. I want you and your ship out of here in a half an hour. Who's going to make us, Bullard, asked with great originality?

31:20I am everybody turned around to see who else had entered the conversation. It was Hansen. I'm going to give you 15 minutes, not 30, Hansen said. Then I'm going to turn the grid power on at full intensity. You can either use it to take off or sit around and roast alive inside your ship. Candle turned and looked at Hansen with new respect. Okay, let's go back to your place. I've still got some things to figure out. Camus was on the verge of hysteria. You are bluffing. You wouldn't dare. I'll report this. 15 minutes later, the ship headed for space. Back in Hansen's room, the two men ate a quick lunch. Then sat at the table and talked about Candle's plans for opening the reluctant door. The way I figure it, Candle said, I think we can handle the whole thing by radio.

32:22Which reminds me, one of these days I'm going to build a tele screen that will transmit and receive through Sudomet. Not too difficult, really. If you approach the problem, I better get Frammer for you. Hansen said, probably. Frammer here said the bass voice. This is Candle. Let me talk to one of your so-called engineering officers. Who the hell shut up and go get him, Candle growled back. And one more yelp out of you and you'll stay in that ship till you're right. There was a pause. Then Frammer again. A meek from it. My chief engineering officer is with me. Okay. Now get this. Come to think of it, you better record it. Number one. By now you know which component is a worm gear. You will notice I'm quite certain that it engages a large, notched wheel. The reason the door will not move is because at the point where the two gears meet, some

33:26of the metal has oxidized. Or possible use in future emergencies, I offer this explanation. The entire mechanism is subject to periodic vacuum when the airlock door is operated. In between times, the mechanism is in the ship's atmosphere. A condition of lower oxygen content thus obtains around the sealed area and such an area is an attic. In other words, corrodeable with respect to the surrounding areas in which oxygen has free access. Now since this door has opened and closed successfully for about 500 years, it appears that there's a special reason why it suddenly refuses to function. But I guess you would experience this condition of intense corrosion only when the aluminum in the wheel gear is exposed to something like sodium hydroxide and only at the point where it controls the worm gear. Now as this ship landed recently within such an atmosphere, three weeks ago on Gorton

34:324 said the weak voice of the engineer. We landed to get said pictures of the cloud formations for souvenirs. We dropped on the edge of a large body of water because the view was better. Candle shook his head sadly and said, you could have avoided trouble by coming in overland instead of the water. The heat in the ship, oiled the water, which undoubtedly contained sodium carbonate and calcium hydroxide, pressed out, and the air was filled with clouds of sodium hydroxide. I suggested you steer away from all such wicked places in the future. Of course, if you learn how to mine or smelt metal, machine components, first they'd have to discover fire. Hanson set out of the corner of his mouth. You're catching on, son. Candle set out of the corner of his mouth. Now gentlemen, to open the door, it will be necessary to break the corroded area apart. This is a large heavy mechanism as such things go.

35:33Since you have no tools heavy enough to batter the corroded area apart, you'll have to make some. How can we? Candle side. I wish I had time to teach you to think, but instead you'll have to do as I tell you to do. I think you can probably make a battering ram out of water. You just don't interrupt. Find and make a long cylindrical container. Fill it with water and quick freeze it in your refrigerator. But they put our thugna bar on the refrigerator again. Then I suggest you get them the hell out, Candle said. An hour later, Ken men smashed a half ton cylinder of ice against the corroded junction of the two gears. Following Candle's instructions, they next supplied the ram to the door itself which smoothly swung open. You'll find, Ken will explain, that the only damage will be the two missing teeth on the aluminum gear. Since only two teeth are ever in contact at any time, you can simply slide the gear forward

36:38and engage it at a point where the teeth are intact. You'll find I'm quite sure that your door will function properly. Also Captain, don't pull out of here until I'm aboard. I think I'd like to bring it along and assist it too. An assistant, Hansen S. Candle twirled the ends of his long white mustache. You, my lad, if you'd like to go along. He pulled a letter from his pocket and fan the air with it. I'm in complete command of this expedition. At least until his exalted excellency gets home to plant his seed. Hansen's face glowed. I can't think of anything I'd rather do. Let's get a couple of messages off the sector headquarters and get on board the ship. It may not be a joyride, Candle said, but you probably haven't heard about it, but there have been a number of ship emergencies in the past few weeks. Door failures? No. At least none I've heard of, but at least two Hegler drives to stop working in midspace.

37:44But there's nothing to stop working. Hansen's eyes twinkle. No moving parts, eh? Hansen reddened. I hope I've outgrown that silly notion. Candle peered into Hansen's eyes. I'm sure you have. I'm sure that you will find out a lot more things for yourself. You're the kind. And we're going to need lots of your kind because failures, failures of so-called perfect mechanisms are becoming more and more commonplace. Candle pointed to the emergency light on the traffic control panel. That light will be flashing with more and more frequency in the months to come. But not just the signal trouble in space. If I were a superstitious man, I'd think that the age of the perfect machine is about to be superseded by the age of the perfect failure. Several failures that can't be explained on any level.

38:47I have several friends who have been in touch with me recently about. You think that it's time for a change? Candle smiled quickly. That's the idea. And the truth of the matter is that I am a superstitious man. I really believe, childishly, that the mechanics and motions of the galaxy may turn themselves upside down just a snap man out of his apathy and give him some work to do. Upside down turned out to be a good word. They boarded the big ship an hour later and were respectfully ushered into the presence of Captain Framer and his staff. Where underway, Captain Framer said, we'll be landing in nine days to deliver our Thagnabar home. How is he, Hanson asked? Framer shrugged. He's been thawed out, frozen, and thawed out so many times. It's anybody's guess. Take a look for yourself. Someone pulled back a curtain to expose the recumbent, thawing, steamy form of his exalted

39:49excellency, our Thagnabar. Why is he undressed? Hanson asked. Funny, now that you mention it, Framer said, puzzled. Why is he undressed? Fascinating. The hardest thing I've ever seen, Candle said. What's so fascinating, Framer asked suspiciously, moving closer. His belly never saw anything like it. Those black squares keep appearing and disappearing. If I've ever seen a truly random pattern, it started right after they froze in the first time. Framer said, disconcilately. Fascinating by heaven, said Candle, who was now down on his hands and knees. Look at the top sequence. And yet physiological. I've got a friend on bride and three who'd trade anything for some photos of this. Get me some photo equipment, will you?

40:50Captain Framer ran his hands through what was left of his hair. Get him some photo equipment, he said to no one in particular. And somebody make a truce with that idiot doctor, long enough to get me a sedative. About this time, the ship turned upside down. But there's no reason for it, the chief engineer said, running alongside Hansen and Candle. The ship can't turn upside down. Everything is functioning perfectly. It's really not interested, said Candle, running down the corridors, mile long ceiling. Figure out something for yourself for a change. But what I can't understand, said Hansen, doodifully traveling alongside, is how you knew was such certainty how the door mechanism was made. Even if submarines were built like that, you'd have no way of knowing there haven't been any submarines in centuries. The hell you say, said Candle, increasing his pace, I built one five years ago. Built one, what for?

41:51For the hell of it, and it was a damn good outfit too. I found plans in an old museum and had the good sense not to improve on them. Just remember, boy, that's something that really works can't be improved. That's when the submarine mechanism was adopted, not adapted for space. The so-called, better way they're building them today is simply a disguise for the fact that most of the gas is gone from our technology. What happened to the submarine? Oh, I traded it to a friend for some Falcons. You interested in Falconry by any chance? No, can't say that I am. You will be, Candle, said profetically. You'll succumb to every enthusiasm man has ever been deviled with. You're the type. It's a disease, boy, and the big symptom isn't just curiosity, but the kind of intense curiosity that turns you inside out devours you and ruins you for orthodoxy.

42:57Hansen had stopped listening. He was absorbed in trying to recall the pattern he had pressed on his radio belt. The pattern never taught to him. When the ship had suddenly turned upside down, hesitantly, he played with the notion that he had been thinking of the ship traveling upside down at the time he impressed a novel pattern on the belt. Now, could that have possibly? The man and boy disappeared down the ceiling, running at top speed to catch up as the rapidly vanishing form of Arthur Gnabar was dragged and pulled relentlessly toward the refrigerator in a tug of war between the ship's wild divided crew. Fascinating, said Candle. His eyes glittering with their own peculiar madness remain riveted on the distant imperial valley, never saw anything like it.

43:59This is the end of No Moving Parts by Murray F. Yacco.