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Mal been working behind the scenes Valentine's Day this coming Saturday and this is what we've got for the rest of the week

Valentine's Day is right around the corner and thanks to adult toy mega store. We're helping you get them a rose

They really want

Well done now

This is actually all things to add up to a mega store. Thank you. They've given me a dozen roses to give away

These are not your typical roses. So well see that's the thing

I usually think of a roses you know roses to give on Valentine's day, but they pump up the prices

Yes, it's ridiculous. Yeah, it's just ridiculous and but these these are more beneficial talk us through them

These are specials. So this is a particular adult toy

It is shaped like a delicate rosebud and it's got about 10 modes of a different suction device

You could say a bit of stimulation in a particular area

How much are they worth because I reckon they're about 50 bucks. I reckon pretty good value

I reckon yeah, on sale they would be about 50 bucks, but I think about $89

Actually very worth it. Yeah, that's good process. That's a lot of proof as well

Very wet sweets

These are roses that last they will not die. Yeah, I'm so we've got as you said we've got 12 of these to give away

I mean not right now between now Valentine's Day. Same dimensions as mine

2.8 inches by 2.1 inches. Oh nice

Should we give away one this morning? We'll get away the one Roger's got in his pocket

Is that what that is Roger? Yeah, that's it. That's why

Very subtle

So he keeps crossing and uncrossing his way. He's actually gone as red as one of the roses

All right, David David good morning. Hey, Dave

Good morning guys. How are you? Yeah, we're really good. How do you like the sound of these kind of roses David?

I reckon it's pretty awesome. It would be a pretty good gift for my partner

You were quite you were quick on the line too. You were already talking to Creech

During Ragee is the machine wanting to win one of these valentines day a day usually you celebrate or

Has this prompted you to get into it this idea of a gift?

No, it's definitely something to usually celebrate. Sorry

This is just a bit of a bit of a cherry on the top sort of thing

So to speak over here is

Well, that's fantastic. On the top or to the side or underneath

We're in your life

David do you and your wife have toys already or will this be the first one for the bedroom?

Do you have like a quiver of all sorts of different shapes and sizes? You can't ask that. I've asked it

I could send you a photo of the dungeon

I'm good. I reckon we have him a rose

You and your partner have a lovely valentines day

Are you guys are awesome. Thank you

More to give away today

Had the story yesterday and so many came through on finders keepers on this because this couple in

Crushed you found $200,000 wrapped up in cash in their ceiling in a house that just bought

They did the good thing they handed the money in

And was deemed proceeds of crime so they're not going to get any money back. That sucks. Yeah, that does they can't prove can I know they can't

Legally, but they probably can they can just determine that it is yeah, they're the right thing didn't they and they don't get any reward

Yeah, well that's it like like said you might have had some of the repays before six or whatever too

But like I can it just sets a bad precedent because why what would encourage you ever to do the right thing when you hear those stories

Exactly right. At least get a little bit. I'm not saying they give them all to a brand. Yeah, some some countries do give you like yeah percentages

Yeah, like if you get after a determined time exactly right

15% in the state that's why Rodge just helps himself

Because he knows

If he doesn't take it no one will give it to like it's like life Rodge. Yeah, you don't take what yours

Yeah, no one's gonna give it to you. No one is gonna give it to you. Absolutely right price

So that's why I would have given back a little bit and kept the rest

And then run

But we didn't want to know finders keepers you've actually found something and you kept it. Yeah, Shannon with us now Shannon

What did you do? So what I did what happens? I got phone call one night was a few years back from the police and they covered a car

Through a

Raid and stuff like that and they want to return it back to me because it was still registered to me

I didn't recognize the plate at first and as a conversation when I was like holy shit

I sold that car years ago sold it. I sold the car. Yeah, and um, they'd obviously kept it in my name. Oh, I've never done a trend

The change over. Yeah, so um, I thought you know, it's only you'll go down and have a look at it

That's not my job. Whatever it is. Buffalo out of it got there and it was not the same condition as when I sold it

When I sold it, it was an average mark treacle cleaner

It was a GT but just a false cylinder and when I got down there

It's had a V8 conversion of paint job good stereo nice mags and they turn around and said it's yours

Do you want to take it now? Do you want to organize a tow truck?

So I said I might as well just take it now

And you still got it no, I felt guilty of all health and you shit. So I sold it and made a killing on it

How much how much is the killing?

Then I think I walked out of about 15 or 16 grand

That does it ever wake you do you think? Oh, I did some undone. No, I'm not that type of person

You're like rogge. Yeah, sleep well sleep well at night

Exactly, you know, obviously they were the wrong people, you know, they didn't deserve to have it

You did society a favor cleaning up the streets

And so you did all the paperwork as you as you passed it on sold it on

This time I did yeah

And ever since then I've made sure I've changed that on my name. Yeah

Well rogge sees no problem. Yeah

That's amazing shadow. That's very good

Thanks, mate

Well, quick question then $200,000 is the original story that the customer who's people found in the house and the bricks are cash

I think they should be given something or assets sets a bad example. What would you do you find 200 grand?

I'll after hearing that I'll keep it you have to because otherwise the police does use any excuse to keep it all those

The settings aren't the police the ones that hooked you up with this car though

Yeah, but it was probably the wrong thing they were doing then as well

Ha

I'm winding up. Good on you buddy. Good on you buddy. Someone someone loose. Yeah. Yeah, you won. Good on you, buddy. Thanks for the cool Shannon

That's what we want there's haves of text coming through which we can get to next miles studio 3520 on finders keep us

varying amounts of people finding

various amounts of money terrible people

We need to get to Scott first miles. I don't want to keep on putting off the text

He's rang through he's rang through Scott. Good morning. You're on the beach. What are you doing?

Good morning boys. I was actually I was living on the Gold Coast at the time. I've actually told the story to James

Right, oh boy. So I was living on the Gold Coast. We had a bit of an inlet down the pyrrine

So decided one day to tap the rod down a bit of a flick and took a few beers and

Needed to go for a week. So I went around the mangroves have a quick peek look down and here's $20 sitting in the mud

And I was thinking I was up you put 20 bucks went to grab it couldn't pull it up

So I cleared away some mud and there's another $50 note and I was like you

70 bucks had good couldn't pull it up

So I cleared some more mud away boys and and discovered that there was actually a bag of money sitting in the mud and

$3,800 later. It was the best day fishing in my life

Scott how good and you kept us

Damn sure I kept it now the bag that didn't get away

I wonder what that was. I wonder if it'd been dropped off a boat or buried there or

Well

bricy we um where we lived we there was quite a big hour sort of like a waterway

So I thought maybe some dude had done a burger and been chased by the cops and have the money on the run and

Yeah, unfortunately with the water coming down it's had the mangroves and sort of just buried itself over time and

Yeah, sweet. What did you do with the money back?

Um, so my missus was pretty good at the time so we brought some stuff for for the baby and my RX-7 needed the tune

So I got my RX-7 tune

This is like the most like quintessential rock, uh, rum or listener story

I feel like I'm on rock drive at my

Feel like I'm on the not

We'll get you out of not for radio. Hit me and you're in the man.com and you little beauty

Yeah

Get on your head

Now I can stuff mate. Thanks guys. Let's not get to the techs

Yeah, I another techs this is here

I was with my two sons the three and two years old only had five bucks for the weekend was at the supermarket

Parked up found a purse next to the driver's door picked it up

Drive away

had $350 in it

Took a hundred

drove to their address at night and put the person there

I needed it

Put in the letterbox. I needed the money

felt bad, but you know same time

How well here's the thing a bit of a dilemma isn't it because you've you've half done something good

But you're also a bad person and I think that's a lot of us

We all have good and we're all we all look in the mirror. We've got good intentions

But let's be honest we're a little bit of a piece of show

Some more than others like Roger. Yeah, you felt bad, but not that bad. Yeah. Well, no, you know that too

You wouldn't have dropped it in the house

I'll probably wouldn't that so that sounds like a lot of hassle

What a piece of work

Outdoor to

Test out door to found a thousand bucks cash on the side of the street

It went towards Christmas presents that yeah, we just kept finding $50 like it was a game show on the side of the street

And in the gutter, and please don't say my name though we won't try

That's not that text Ryan said I found a hibis jack up at up a rural road. It was dirty

So I took it home to wash and out came $1200 into the washing machine

Trek the owner down is very appreciative of excuse me and gave me a gift basket

There you go

So he handed it back great

12 hundred, see if someone handed me back 12 hundred cash

I think, well, what do you think reward should be for that, Rodge?

If someone gave me a 5 hundred, I found $200 cash and I said, Rodge, here you go, he's $200

What's my reward?

I would give you $200

Yeah, that's why I reckon it's here

You would not give $200

Why would you give $200 or something?

You're a bald face liar, I want to hear from you

Saying you would give $1,200

$200, sorry, $200, $1,200

There is no way

Well, I would give you nothing else

Yeah, don't you point at me

You are lying

But that is a good amount to give back I reckon

Thank you, Mel

Not that you would

Not that you would

You need a little text, Mel

Yeah, it's not even an hour's worth

So I'm a liar

He's two hundred people from Stamps Mikes

You're good on your mate

When I was an apprentice build, I was doing a demo on a house in Mount Eden and Auckland

I found a bundle of old post-stamps

I told no one, took them to one of those companies that buy old stamps back

12k worth of stamps

Oh, got it

Where did they find them?

In an old house doing a Rena in Mount Eden

So stole from the house?

Yeah

Is that finding or stealing?

Yes, we were into

I must move on

Josh, I found a ring on my way to work about $8.30 in Remuero in Auckland

Oh, that's mine

So a little box sitting on the road, I scooped it up as I was turning into a street from my car

I opened it

Shiny Diamond

Steering back at me

About eight grams worth of diamonds in an emerald

Had up for about nine years

Got it broken up and remade into the Mrs. Wedding Ring

I don't know about that

Is that bad karma?

See, there's levels, isn't there on this?

Today, there's levels

What do you make of that, Rodge?

I'm not really into rings, so I don't know

I wouldn't

Any more tigs?

Yeah, two more beauties

Two more beauties

Quickly get to the tailor

Found 14k cash

Stash behind a backseat of my hole

The next set I bought years ago in Aussie

That's all it says

Doesn't say anything else

Yeah, and Tony

I found a belly stuff

Yeah

I found 22k in cash of different currencies

And three rare gold sovereign coins in an abandoned storage unit

They paid $300 for

Oh, that's like that program

Hey, you buy those storage rooms

Oh, yeah

Whatever you get is whatever you get

Yeah, that's right

So you keep that

Some have some rippers

You can keep that, produce some urge

There we go

Yeah, I sort of thought you were going to bring this up, Rodge

While we were talking finders keepers

I think you might have found something

Around the studio

And you might have kept it

Recently?

Like, yeah

Recently in the last couple days

Might have to play a song

Yeah

You're so killed now

Man, let's go know you

Oh no

I thought we were going to wrap it up

But produce some urge

What have you got some evidence against me?

Yeah, well

So we're quite lucky

We'll occasionally get sent some baked goods

By some great friends of ours

Bakers delight

Well, mate, can I just say too

Two years ago we got sent that lovely cake

Yeah, in order of the chiefs and blues game this weekend

Of course

Valentine's Day

On Valentine's Day

Thanks for that, that was great

And how much do we appreciate it?

The office appreciates that we love sharing in a bit of baked goods

Bakers delight, sent us some hot cross buns

So they?

You know I love hot cross buns

Well, it wins the exact thing

Because we should have had it to share around the office on Monday

Monday

But we need to go to Monday

Yeah

Because I think Roger might have found them before everyone else had seen them

And he took off with a whole box of hot cross buns from Bakers delight

You take those

I actually think I saw you leaving with them

Did you not share them?

This one?

Where are they?

This will be hard to prove much

It's on the Instagram store

You don't

You absolute dog

I forgot how much of an absolute thief you are on the workplace

Just take them home

How many in the box?

Look at that

Look at that

That is damn it

Oh, a lot too

Who do you think you are?

The king

The hot cross bun king

Jesus, he tasted too good

Why would you not share them?

No, no one seemed to be around and I went out

I was here, I watched you

You walked past, you didn't even say goodbye

They would have been doing your show

I took the photo

Did you?

I took the photo, I tuned around

This one was here

Yeah, I did

He often looks quite vacant

I thought he's not going to know as much

Did he offer you any merch?

No, but I'm a little fed of raisins

Of course

Raisins

Raisins

I thought he'd run out of spot like a long cross bun

I thought he'd run out of spot like a long cross bun

Because it wouldn't have been signed the morning rumble, right?

Yeah, it wouldn't have been signed

Yeah, it wouldn't have been signed the morning rumble, right?

Grab it up

No

No, that's all fair enough

I'll take that

I'll take that

Can you make us something, maybe

To make up for it, right?

Bring it, bring it your own baking

For the rest of the morning rumble

Not a guy you'd want to go to war

That's all I'll say

No, you're not fair enough, I'll take that

But Bry, so we got, you know, if we're looking at ourselves

No, just let's just have a separator here

You know, our little divider in the show

Where I can see something else

I don't want to talk to you or look at you

Coming up on the morning rumble

I'm going to take it away from Roger

His terrible behaviour

A morning rumble intervention next

Oh, I want to see you

Where someone is singled out

We have a little bit of a group chat

And we go, hey, be better

We're an intervention next

And it's a first, a very first on the show

As to who is getting the intervention

It's time we stop talking about it behind the backs

It's time up for a morning rumble intervention

Rice, good morning

Morning, it's a first, it's a first, first, first of all here

So morning rumble intervention usually

It's the time where we can gather in a member of the show

Bring them in, have a bit of a chat

Of course

Let's have a look at what you're doing here, behaviour wise

Always me

And it's usually often you

And it could have been you with the whole hot crossbow thing there

I know, I know

But then see you guys in a first on the morning rumble

Or morning rumble intervention

I was thinking they had one on you, yeah

Look, so today I read a study first thing this morning

And there is a study which suggests a huge link between hair loss

And masturbation

Oh

Are you not, are you not, are you not plaguing yourself enough?

Tell us the findings

Recent studies in reports of smart conversation

About the potential link between excessive self-play

And hair loss

Oh dear

So they're saying that the more you do it

Your hair might fall out

And sometimes I think to myself, why did I go bald?

No, no

Why did I go bald at 32?

So like

And now I might have the answer

And you got the answer?

I mean, scientific proof price, yeah

So what you're saying is it's a rugged tug

So you're just doing it too much

You're going to need a toupee

Other things don't you need to explain parts

Stress, diet, sleep, combined with high levels of activity

Contribute to noticeable hair changes

Is it too late or can you change your way, bro?

Oh you haven't got a full head

I need a review, man

None of you do, really?

What the hell is Duncan hiding from the afternoon?

Show doing to himself

Flogging himself

It's like legal, isn't it?

Couldn't be boulder

Those two in there don't know what how to do it

Full head of hair

Damning research price

Damning research

Shaming, that is not good

No good, no good

Never look at myself

Yeah, no good at all

Stop it

Mel, use the sport at 7

Don't do it now

Never stop it

Oh smooth as ice ice, man

The Morning Rumble podcast

Valentine's Day is right around the corner

And thanks to Adult Toy Megastore

We're helping you get them a rose

They really want

Mel organised this

There's an easier way

You can text in rose

3520

Or give us a call on this one

Oh it had a rock phone

We've got 11 left, don't we tell us more?

We do, thanks so much to Adult Toy Megastore

They have given me a dozen roses to give out

And the lead up to Valentine's Day

Which is Saturday Feb 14

These are not the typical roses that you're thinking of though

These ones give you pleasure

They last long

I'm talking about the rose

Suction Adult Toy

They are shaped like a delicate little rose

They fit in the palm of your hand

And they've got this incredible suction device

That has 10 modes that you can choose from

They look fantastic

They really look like you can take them anywhere

You can

Perfect for solo

Or like couple play or travel

You put them in your pocket roach

Like what he's done with it

Which I've done the last time

Roses that actually last

Of course

So you're looking at your bad dates

Valentine's Day all about getting together

Any bad dates

Like a horror date

You actually had

This was Valentine's Day if you wasn't it Valor?

This was Valentine's Day very quickly

I had someone book me in for a massage

Had the massage

And he didn't pay for it

So at the end of it I had to

Fork out $110 for this beautiful massage

And then I went back and we had a dinner

And you know that I'm pissed at you

Well that's right there

You went back

No, I met up for dinner

At his

And he ordered KFC

For a pescatarian

I mean KFC is all good, but yeah

I know it's not really good

I can't believe we matched

I can't, you know

And now we end up working together

Why did you even go to dinner?

When the end paid for the massage

That's what I was going to do

I am who I am

Oh we know

Great example

I'm a bad date

No, you're looking at bad dates

Could be Valentine's Day, could be any bad date

Yeah

Alana, good morning

Good morning, how are you?

Good, now tell us about your terrible date

Oh, it was horrible

I was living in Sydney

And I matched with this guy on Zeus

And all his profile photos

And like his description

He was like the sixth foot fit guy

Yeah

When I met him for the day

He was shorter than me

And I'm only five six

So I'm not particularly tall

Was he like Roger's high?

How short are we talking a lot?

Yeah, it wasn't good

And I see Timah

So you look different to your photo

And he's like, why are you that small photo?

I'm like, why are you shrunk?

Okay

So his idea was a date

With Timah McDonald's

And get a dollar frozen coat

And I said, no, no, no

It's alright, I'll pay for myself

If you keep your dollar

And then he proceeded to ask if he comes

Stay with me for a few days

Because he now had nowhere to live

What?

What?

Roger's the short

Oh my God, that shirt

It was so bad

Oh no

So no

Didn't progress

No, no, if he can stay

And I ghosted him

Like it was, yeah

Sometimes proud of ghosting

But I think it was the only avenue

Yeah, you got to say no

Well, here's the thing though

It's not like he could have that many options for a first date

It's not like he can take you to a theme park

He wouldn't be able to go on the right

No

Watch

And also I'm way taller than 5'6

Oh, is that bullshit now?

Way too long

Way too long

If you're taller, it's fine, isn't it?

And you wear those puffy shoes

Those hiking shoes, you know

What are we working now?

Yeah, I'm giving you a rose

Valentine's Day

Oh, no, no, no

The rose suction adult toy

Things to adult toy megastore

Excellent

Who's that?

It was about a year ago

Leading into Valentine's Day

A guy who works here

Kamen with an absolute butte of a pickup line

Which led to our crook, I should say pickup lines

Which we're going to get to

Oh man

But he's in here this morning

A year on to celebrate

Oh, he works at the office

What a treat

What a man, what a character

Office Max, he's called Gale Max, so you're made

Oh, Gale

Not only does it work in the office

But he works every angle in life

Doesn't he?

So much so

There's all too much for Mel

She took scusers out from the studio

Yeah, we'll share

You have that effect on woman, don't you Max?

Yeah, they tend to run away

Now, Max, a little bit of a stitch up

You don't know why we've bought you in here, right?

I never do

No, no

And you never come to ball

You're not a guy who seeks the limelight

No

But on a bit of an update

Do you remember saying this was

Exactly a year ago

This is you, Max

Do you like whales?

Because we can go hump back at my place

That's good

I like that

So, one year on

Yeah

We're looking for a year in review

Office Max, how's your game going?

How's it going?

That was a great pick-up line

That's so good

And as Bryce said, mate, it's a year

And pretty much the day

Well, look at...

Well, I've got a missus now

Have you?

Have you?

Honestly, Max, you don't have the law

Why did he take that long to say that as well?

I got painted up

Because I knew this would be the response

Okay, okay

And when so, what...

What AI generator are you using?

Oh, do you need it?

No, I'm not using it

I'm not using it

I'm using it

I'm using it

I'm using it

I'm using it

I'm using it

I'm using it

I'm using it

I'm using it

I'm using it

I'm using it

No, I'm not using it

I'm not using it

No, I'm not using it

I'm not using it

What are your plans for Saturday?

Valentine's Day

A significant one for you

Duffle

Oh, what a keeper

She's so lucky

She's so lucky

She's one of the lawfulers

Are you actually going to see her on the weekend?

No

Even better

She's not going to even see her

You're not even going to see her some flowers or some chocolates

I might send her a text or something

As I said, lucky lady

Thanks Max

Thanks Max

We'll see you in another year

Thanks Max

Coming up on the morning rubble

She's not real

Oh, no, she doesn't live here

Conveniently doesn't live here

How?

How?

I'll get my belly back in

I love that

I love these in a relationship

I know

I'm not

Like, what the heck is going on?

Well, you had to chance with Max

You didn't take it

So, now we're going to come back

Because rebus it some crook pickup lines from last year

We had to

But don't you, don't you

Don't you have any vacancy on this lifeboat

Don't you strangle your life

You should have been doing this

I don't think the whole crook segment

Is a terrible idea

This was disgusting

I think it's amazing and we're doing it

But I guess

If ever there was a week to get in to pick up lines

Two days out from Valentine's Day

This would be it

Crook pickup lines

Which we kicked off about a year ago

Leading into Valentine's Day

But because of what office Max had said

Of course, office Max was his pickup line

Yeah

And the crook ones came in

Just to maybe re-freak

Well, I don't think we should

Well, no

You know you say that but it's not good

This is you reading them

So it's like

It's not AI

It's like, I mean, it's tough really

You remind me of my little toe

I might bang you on the coffee table later

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Oh, that was a good one

I don't have a coffee table

I'm jealous of your heart

It's pounding away

And so I do not

Oh my god

That's so bad

Oh my god

Are you a sea lion?

Because I can see your lion in my bed

Oh my god

It's smooth

Propaganda

Let me ever propaganda at those

Oh my god

Oh, she's

Oh my god

That isn't age one

I know these aren't big rocks

None of these are good

Sorry, sorry, sorry

That's not good

None of these are good

Would you like to try an Australian kiss?

Oh no

What's an Australian?

Well, it's like a freech kiss but it's down under

Oh my god

No, not bad

Oh my god

It's pretty good

Roger fan of space

You said, oh, big fan of rice

Oh no

Big fan

There will only be seven planets

No

I have to write it

Stop playing it

Oh my god

Oh my god

Oh my god

Oh my god

Roger, try to get me five

Well, that was a year ago

And you didn't get five a year ago

So I

We're going to get two

Yeah, we're going to get two

Actually, a bad idea

I've got some others I didn't get two

Oh my god

Oh my god

10 and 10

3, 5, 2, 0

They have just joined us

Croc pick up loans

Which we did last year

Leading into Valentine's Day

Boy oh boy

Played some examples before

This is

You

Well, this is so bad

Roger

Roger's

Writing rough shot

Over the show

And making us do this

He's making rice

Put his career in jeopardy

He's forcing me to re-ticks

Visitors

He's no risk or reward

Yeah, he is

Well, you've always been offered

Rice was offered

Then he came back round again

Produced the creatures

Been reading some out to us

Off here

Should have been

Should have been

Created

You're not allowed to participate

In this anymore

You're the worst

In a lot of

That recycling

1, 100 off here

Oh wow

It's really good

It's not broadcastable

There's some out

Seamount

Single

Pick up lines

Yes or no

I actually don't mind them

If you're very creative

It can't be the ones

That you hear over and over again

But some of these ones

See but there's a fine line

Between funny and crook

Isn't there a good one

Funny and offensive

This one's a good one

I might not be the best

Locking person in the bar

But I'm the only one talking to you

You see that button

See that's good

The rest of them are crook

See some of them are

What about

What about someone

How's about we make

Like Bryce Casey

And get out of here

I see

We're hooking up

Oh right

Michelle Tixon

Michelle says

Do you want to go back

To my house and help me

With some math homework

We'll add a bed

Subtract our clothes

Divide some legs

And multiply

It's a lot of work

It's a lot of work

It's a lot of work

It's a lot of work

It's a lot of work

It's a lot of work

I'm terrible at math

What about

What about what about

This is a nice one

Girl are you and appendix

Because you give me a funny feeling

In my tummy

And I want to take you out

That's not bad

Not the worst part

Cheesy though

Yeah little I like the first one

What about

Puma squirrel

Because I've got some nuts

To bury

I love that I love squirrels

Squirrels live in trees

Have you seen a tree lately

How about a root

Hey let's

Well on that note

Hey what about

Hey let's go home

And play house

You can be the door

And I'll slam you

Girl are you from China

Because I'm China

Grab that ass

Yeah

You said you weren't going to

Read that one

It's too loud

I did actually do that

Can you enter that one out

Can you enter that one out

But on the dunk button

What about are you a chicken farmer

Because you sure know

How to raise

Raise

A male

Do you like wine gums

Then wine your gums

Or else

You give a god

Me and your gums

You see it not

You see it not to read that

You see it not to read that

You see it not to read that

You see it not to read that

Because you've got

Rhyme and gums

Rhyme and gums

This good

If I flip a coin

How do you reckon my chances

Are of getting heads

Head

Head

Head

Head

Head

Head

Let's play Titanic

I yell out I speak

And you go down

Yuck bro

No, that's

Absolutely disgusting

No, that's

That's a rough ride

That's really rough

That's really rough

Have a crit

You'll turn the mic

So when you go

Good stuff guys

Nailed it

Yeah, absolutely

Have a crit

Have you been to the bat

Plenty lately?

No, no

No, I haven't

Because tonight you're gonna fuck a tarnet

I shouldn't have read that one

Use a dunk button, Roger

Oh dear

Next

Next

Next

Produce a merchant update

On the CNB Hall of Fame

After Metallica

That's so awesome

Oh my god

Oh my god

That's really good

Males good stuff

We've had your crook pick up lines

Yeah

And we're gonna be looking at

The CNB Hall of Fame

Well, we're not

We're not

We're not

We're not

We're gonna email

As a member of the show

So it's time to straighten the show

It's not an only one in Hamilton anymore, Roger

We've had 40 minutes of this sort of content

This one

Rubby con

Ziggin and Zaggin

And we can come back to the CNB

We'll come back to the CNB all right

Grow up, get out of the gutter

Because it's time for a life update from you, Roger

Actually is

So

Which we were gonna talk about

But yeah, I can do it now

Sam Ruth

Talked to his dad, Ben Ruth

Right?

Sam Ruth

16 ran the mile

Amazing

3 minutes, 48

The 11th fastest time ever

Fastest for a 16-year-old

Fastest for an 18-year-old

He's just extraordinary

I took it upon myself to think

Okay, so a mile is 1600 metres

I went to the gym on Monday

1.6K

You're 1.6K

Yeah

I went to the gym on Monday

It's the first time I've been back to the gym this year

That's terrible

What's the point?

What's the point of having a member show?

That's me

You sound like my wife

So I thought to myself

Okay, he can do it in 3.48

Yeah

How fast can I run a mile on the treadmill?

I love that

First time I'm sorry

Never been a runner

That's not a runner, oh my god

Let's do the CNB stuff

Now this is bold

So if you did it

If he did it in 3.48

3.48 record

That's extraordinary

Yes, of course

Yeah

And 1.6K

How fast do you think Roger'd be able to do it miles?

Miles, how fast do you think I'd ran the mile?

1600, 1.6K

Oh, 7 minutes

She's a genius

I reckon you've given him a lot of credit

I reckon he struggled to do 1K this year

Yeah, like 22 minutes

Oh, that's offensive

Okay, okay, okay

I'm going to go 9 minutes

9 minutes to do the mile price

When the records, the 16-year-old can run it 3.48

Yeah

I think Miles is close

I'm going to give it a round

I'm going to round it off

Put her to perfect 10 minutes

Oh, okay

And I think if you didn't do it in 10 minutes

It really actually needs a look at yourself

Well, it's humiliating

Someone said an hour

I ran a mile on the treadmill

1.6K

1.6K

Which is different from mine on a track

Or the roge

13 minutes, 25

That's horrific

It was horrific

I was like, there must be something wrong with the treadmill

Blaming the treadmill

You guessed it, You guessed it a treadmill

Something close up banging it

There's something wrong

Why is it going so slow

Why the number's so slow

And it was

With short legs

1.6K

There's a long way

1.6K is a long way for a little fella

I think with my bung-leg

I can walk

That's the positive way

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's it's a not true and B you're better than that

Sorry, I'm gonna I'm gonna improve I know I'm gonna improve on that time

How much though

That was my first go I reckon I can knock minutes off that I can knock minutes off that

Let's oh

Well a week a week

How are you getting it better in a week? I will just you a sore for days after stop still sore

Why are you showed or so? Did you did you run the entire 13 minutes?

I actually did

So what do you want to do next week a week? I'll have a better time for you. I'll have old we had hope so yeah, yeah

But it has to be significantly better than it can't you can't just shave a couple of seconds

Did you drink a yachty at your 25th? I actually did took me 40 minutes

Valentine's Day is right around the corner and thanks to adult toy mega store. We're helping you get them a rose

They really

Yes

Yes, welcome

Mel's running and Mel running the cutter on this one here

I looked at worse dates after seven great calls and text coming through and a cheating scandal is exploited at the winter Olympics

Yeah, I don't know if you saw this if you've been keeping out with the winter Olympics

But this Norwegian guy who won a bronze medal yesterday while he was being interviewed after accepting his medal

He went on to confess that he had cheated on his partner

And it had been like one of the worst weeks of his life despite his win

Yeah, you already got bronze medal. Sorry. I said that he already had the gold at home

Too late, mate. No, but what a way to reveal that live on TV

Okay, right. I've been told let's go to lie in 10

anonymous anonymous and so yeah worst way you found out wasn't on live TV for example

You can text through 3520 anonymous. Good morning

Good morning. Hello worse way you found out your partner was cheating

Well, my friends have I we have to remove him from drinks one night

Um, please scan our out haven't a little lesson as you do

Um heard the entire conversation the family with another lady

How how on the how that happened

We have no idea so now do we are hearing him on a phone call or were we were hearing him? Oh, okay

That was on the cell phone call

You heard your partner was he in the house was he in the area like no he was in the South Island and I was in the North Island

And you you were bang on it was her I'm talking to another lady

100% 100% we find them afterwards and had a good laugh

Oh, you laughed it off well laughed as in like you you're out of the house sort of thing or

Well, it's coming to the end of the relationship, so

Okay

None of us

I know I know it was like one of those meant to be moments. It was like okay. This is coming me. This is it

So was he away on business? Is that what he said he was doing or

He was working down the line. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, she didn't at the same time and you'd had your suspicions prior. I I guess anonymous

Yeah, I guess so. Yeah, okay, and on thanks so much

Thank you, man. It's not a great not a great way at all. We did we did say keep it keep it light

Yeah, it's okay. See if it this one's any better. Oh

Yeah, I'm going the line one. Yeah, okay, I think we were going anonymous. Hi

Oh, sorry, will we not supposed to be another anonymous number two?

Morning

Um, so I was at home. I was fully pregnant with our with our second children

I think it's all right my um my partner had gone to babysit his three-year-old sister at his mum's house

And um, I don't know. I've never checked his socials before but something was just really nagging at me

So I turned on his computer and his Facebook popped up and I was literally watching these messages between these two pop up

But like right in front of my eyes

Um, just about you know, things that they'd been doing um things that she was experiencing afterwards

I'm really rotten

No way to find out no one deserves it. No, once again. No, Mal's didn't say these keep us light

And uh, you just say and I got

Yeah, did you jump in the convo and then nice having back good call

Ah, I just kind of know sort of watching them and sort of shaking um, and I called him and I'm like

There's like anything you want to tell me and he's like, I don't know what you're talking about

I'm on your Facebook

You should have run from has Facebook messenger because you can ring from messenger, right? Yeah, it sounds like you know

What's Facebook find that right

It's all over it's all over now, Casey

Um, yeah, I left him in Australia and moved back to New Zealand

Casey no one deserves that

Sorry that happened that's uh, that's beyond poor, but appreciate the call. Yeah, thank you

And uh, should we give Casey a rose do you like a rose from adult toy megastore?

I would love one

We'll send it to you on Facebook

Let's keep these lighten funny

So many oh my god so many ticks come to America

We want to know we wanted some of the funny ones

Yeah, now remember these people who texted they actually wanted to share their story

So that's all over laugh along, okay, I don't know if I can you said

Well, I see it. Keep them light and funny. Yeah, yeah, but if they're not they're not

Has been born a girl home on New Year's even I found out by looking at the security cameras

He tried to sneak her into the sleep out

Classic great. Thanks for sharing

My cousin found out his wife was cheating on him with his best mate by using a hidden camera in a teddy bear while he was away for work

Somehow they're still friends and I've done it together with them and his new wife always knew he was a bit weird

Cheers, what she's had an exclamation mark. It's a classic. He's happy with that. It's like a movie

My ex told me his female workmate was in a bad relationship and needed a place to stay

I cleaned out a room and set it up for her. She was his mistress and her boyfriend had kicked her out

They work nights. They had every day to spend together at home

Water coincidence

I got cheated on two months out from my open heart surgery

That's a broken heart

What a good what a good text

At a beach you're not right at a beach day with my friends and my phone went flat

So I borrowed my partner's phone to go on trade me to watch an auction. I'd been watching there was about to finish

He gives me his phone no problem and I go on to safari the browser to see he has an account with Ashley

Madison in a fairs website

What a awkward coincidence

Found out my partner was cheating on me from seeing him on a Facebook group

Idiot. We're dating the same guy

Three years and I turn and turns out I was one of five regular girlfriends and many other one-off

Oh

Man, that's classic

She was on holiday but left her iPad at home so I can watch youtube netflix as our tv was still be to deliver

Be delivered Ipad was still signed into messenger

Her messages to the new guy popping up on the screen as I was watching

Needless to say it was over when she got back from holiday. She had no idea. I'd seen it all happening in real time

Man, we laugh

Last one last one all right

My ex was going on holiday with his mates to the Philippines

He left his Facebook open on the computer and I saw messages about how he was actually going to meet his new wife

Oh

Holy heck

For that miles. Hey well delivered mate

Now it's so light and funny

You got more of these to give away these adult toys tomorrow. Thanks to adult toy mega store and Friday as well

Valentine's Day will think of

Now produce a creature morning to your mates. Good morning team. Hello. There's the old show today

And I need to get to your gym habit. So of course, and we're going to the corner. Oh, yes, please

I don't mind come on it. Yes, of course. Is it in there much? Have we got the creek? Yes, we do actually

Creatures corner

I creed

I jumped the gun on that one creed. Yes, of course. It's in your corner there. So I just sorted out

Yeah

Yeah, sorry guys. Sorry. So I now that you've been inspired by me

I tried to run a mile, which is 1.6k on the treadmill

Well, I did I did it in 13 minutes 25 seconds, which is appalling and you blame the treadmill

Yeah, the time must be wrong. What is wrong? And this was based upon if you missed it because Sam Ruth the Prodigy runner

Three minutes 48 exactly. We've got it in 13 minutes. Yes. So you heard this chat. Yeah, look and I've got some goals of my own

No, I know I'm not going to be running a mile in two minutes or anything like that

And I know I'm not going to look like dwayne the rock Johnson in a few months

But I am hoping to get a bit stronger and a bit fitter. Okay. Okay. So I've signed up to a gym

I'm for the for the first time in a few years

Thank you very much

When I'm naked, I look like golem

So I do I do want to I do want to add a bit a bit of um you've got abs. Yeah, well, and you've got a bit of a tan

You sort of you sort of look like um, um, and I'd not choose this name is fine, but uh, the jesus

Yes

But he could it could play him

If jesus was on a bender

The amount of people that have come up to me at rave skicks and on benders and ask me for forgiveness

I'm the wrong guy

Um, but anyway, I've signed with a gym

Yeah, I signed up. Uh, start of jane. I think it was around the sixth

I like a classic g was I need to I've partied hard. Yep. I need to start

2026 with a new zest for life exactly new habits. Yep. New years resolution did r and v did chore classic

There's some other festivals got back. All right. I'm joining the gym. I've signed up. I've been paying weekend week out

Nice and I haven't been

You haven't been once since the beginning of jane

No, once you haven't gone in over a month. Yeah, what's been stopping you? It's the 10th of feb. Is it is the 11th? Yeah, yeah

It's just a bit of a mess

How far away is it from where you live? Oh, about a 10 minute walk

But I just these early mornings are so tired

What's up? Costing you yeah about 15 a week and the joining fee was about 80

Surely there's no joining fee in the start of the year

There's specials to get everybody in or is it because there's so many people joining maybe you don't do that

Maybe they're leaching off people like me

Then in those new years resolutions that join up and then never commit. So you haven't been once not one day

Have you been motivated enough to get it? Have you even got your swipe and stuff? Have you gone to get all that stuff?

No, I don't know. I don't know how I'll get into this gym

Film me. Film me. You must have been busy yesterday then. What did you do? You saw where you flat out?

I

Had a nap

I got home around one 30-ish and I napped till about five

Did you actually? Yeah

Yeah

I'm so jealous

Preacher's quarter

And I was like great honestly. You won't be the only one. No

No, no, he won't be

Also, you haven't even been to the doctor about your right

Again, the map got in the way of that. Yeah. It doesn't mean to the gym you're in time in the show

We have we got like a search for New Zealand's worst gym bro

You know how there's the punchy gym bros that you see every day them online that are like

Yeah, you see them in the gym and they come and sit up cameras and stuff and film themselves doing their technique

Talk to themselves in the mirror. We're wearing the mirror out. They're like, geez

So and good on those people there. Yeah, they're doing it

Great, but then we've got creatures of the world. Are you a creature like it? How long have you had a membership and not used it?

That's what we want to know. Oh 800 rock phone three five two zero. You won't be the only one creature

I hope not

Well, how much are you going to reckon in the year that you had a membership, roach? I've only been once this year

And I did a 13 minute mile

Ha

Creates creatures corner told us about his gym. Well, there's a gym habit. He's got no gym habits. He's signed up to the gym

Yep and creates you haven't been

Yeah, not one not once you can't even got your swipe card yet. No, no, no, so I don't know how I'll get in no

Maybe I need a little snop. Yeah, yeah

Maybe today

Typically useless in terms of

Um

Just you know, because you haven't been to the doctor to get your eye

Even though you got told to that they haven't been to the gym been a member for a month

Yeah, you had you no off or licensed for ages. Yeah, you never anything in your bedroom. No, there's a trend

Yeah, yeah, it kind of makes me wonder how I got this job

Uh, same which requires a lot of organization and not being useless, but yeah when it comes to life

Uh, you know, I'm turning 30 this year. I still feel about 13

I'm on the line yet

Uh, but we try and we keep going once you know it after another but you're not

Oh

Yeah, lots of highway for creeps that

That it is

He's actually just pulled over in a rest area

And he's fallen asleep. He's napped not alone though

So many people like who have these good intentions and they never follow through them

We're looking for New Zealand's worst gym bro. Yeah, let's go to let's go to blaze

I can't grow

How's it going? You got so good mate. So are you a creature when it comes to the gym?

Oh, I'm probably worth okay. Tell us

So I sort of have it for uh

We gym membership for six months and I sweat. I'll jump on board

Um did that signed up and then never went two years later. I was still paying the 37 dollars a week

And you've never seen you've paid that you've never been

Never been

It's what we're after. I know, but have you why haven't you done it? What was stopping you? Why haven't you gone to stop that?

Well drinking got involved and that was more important at the time

Yeah, but thanks buddy. It's exactly what we're after. That's so crazy

3848 dollars that he spent yeah without he's without going to the Jimmy's

That just sitting at home drinking beer. Sam good morning

Good morning. Sam you're in the same boat

Yeah, well, not me my husband. Yeah, he um

He gave me as bank statements to look through when we were getting a mortgage

And I found that he had been paying for a gym in a city we didn't even live in

Over five years

Sam how much did that add up to do you know? Oh, I don't know. It was like $20 the way

For five years and it was in car

At least he I think he signed up when he was a student and he just forgot like

Gave me PTSD. It was there every week on the ground

And so where was the gym membership and where were you living at the time

The gym membership was in Parme. Yeah, we were living in Auckland

How have I commute? How have I been?

It wasn't a chain that he could have gone like they have like city fitness jets

These nails like snap yeah, all those ones

Yeah, well, I'm pretty sure it was like a jet so I was like you could have gone, but

Yeah, he didn't even he didn't even know it just he jets pamas north. I was like great

Sam, that is no good. It's a lot of money. I thank you for your call mate. Appreciate it. Thanks him

Good shape now though. Yeah, it doesn't really need the gym. Is he ripped? No, no, he's good

Yeah, good. I thought she was gonna say no

He's not

We are useless. So do say you can be really useless in terms of

Following through with any admin that seems somewhat difficult

Yeah, like even just from personally like not so much for the gym stuff, but even emails you look at emails every day

And you have these million different bits of spam every day that are from these same countries

You bought one thing from and you have to put your details on and all it would take is for you to take

Three seconds to go to that unsubscribe part in the bottom of the email and you wouldn't get them from that company again

But you don't you don't know and every day you go clear these you know 10 20 emails

Yeah, we're just useless. I just get them daily from briskos with their specials

Cool

You'd probably take them up on

You have a special you create shop producer not the only one who signed up to go to the gym

And hasn't been and it's been a couple of months, which is nothing compared to what's coming through studio 3520 miles

Oh boy. Oh, I had a membership 12 months. Haven't been since I signed up. It's from Michael

Oh, yeah, yeah, been twice in two years. It's still a member

Pay for a gym membership for three years at uni use it twice through 120 bucks a year says Joe

Mark I was a member of a gym for 12 months. The gym was next door to work

Never went

Once

Back in the day you could buy a Liz mill's life membership

A membership which my lovely partner bought. I've been with ever 15 years. She's never gone

To you can't really tell

Guy to girl to go to the gym. That's right. I know that doesn't go down well. No, no done that before

That ended someone told you to go

I was like maybe you should you know, oh you told someone routine going on didn't like that. No, didn't like mal telling him what to do

So we're still on

Yeah, so maybe don't do that decide on your own. Yeah

Smells advice

Miles

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I don't add into the gym for four years went twice

And I've a mate who signed up for two jumps for four years and never went to either

12

Gym two jumps four years

Till you go to either

How much are you going now? How often would you go do workouts in gym? I would do one every day

That's my thing whether it's like a spin or going to the gym doing my pilates. I do something every day

Well, there you go. Yeah, one and a half going to the gym works like we can tell

This has been the morning rumbles show highlights to hear our off-year chat. Check out the rest of the podcast feed

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