S8e15: Jessica Kizer – Finding Belonging Through Our Commonalities

Jessica Kizer, PhD and Professor of Sociology, shares her powerful life story. One of the main threads of her story is the deep feeling and sense of not belonging. Through her story, we can understand how identities, roles, and circumstances can cause us to feel as if we do not belong in this world as we are for who we are. You’ll also hear Drew reflect to Jessica: “…that’s stereophonic not-belonging on overdrive.” Through her studies in Sociology, Jessica began to understand how societal forces shape our lives societal constructions, and choices made by others.

A myriad of steps and people brought Jessica to the Hoffman Process. On her first day, she felt that all-too-familiar pang of not belonging. She saw that she was the only Black person there.  This was the reality. Immediately, she felt a familiar pain of distance from everyone. But in the first few days, she experienced a shift. You’ll hear Jessica share a moment when she saw that we can have very different life stories but arrive at the same place, feeling the same things about ourselves and our place in the world. This was when she began to focus on “our commonalities and not on our differences” in her time at the Process and after.

As a mixed-race, neurodivergent person who teaches Sociology at a top university, perhaps Jessica’s story is one we can identify with because we don’t share those same identities. The patterns of not belonging, having to prove our worth, and feeling like we are in the wrong place, are common patterns among us.  Jessica’s experience, wisdom, and understanding, both academically and personally, shed a powerful light on the human experience. We hope you enjoy this conversation with Jessica and Drew.

More about Jessica Kizer:

Jessica Kizer was born and raised in a multigenerational, multiracial family in the South Bay of Los Angeles County. Her spiritual journey led her first to Hoffman Essentials and then the Hoffman Process in June 2023, where she experienced deep healing for herself and her family. As a result of her experiences growing up Black, Puerto Rican, and Indonesian and neurodivergent in a neurotypical world, she developed a strong sense of justice, equity, and inclusion, which led her to a career as a sociology professor.

In her courses, Jessica creates educational experiences so that everyone can learn and, in turn, helps students learn how to communicate sociological research in a way anyone can understand. In her courses, students tutor elementary school students and then write and illustrate sociological storybooks for the children’s home libraries. They also participate in intergenerational and interracial dialogues on race, research, and create podcasts on racial inequality, which they share with elders.

Jessica loves going on walks and talks, journaling, and finding adventure in the everyday. She lives in Los Angeles with her husband, their two cats, and two dogs. Follow Jessica on Instagram.

As mentioned in this episode:

Hoffman Essentials

Jehovah’s Witness

Marni Battista – Listen to Marni on the Hoffman Podcast

EMDR

Brainspotting

Kristin Neff – Listen to Kristin on the Hoffman Podcast

Quad Check:
The Quad Check is a practice to support you in checking in with all four parts of your Quadrinity: Spiritual Self, Intellect, Emotional Self, and your Body. To practice Quad Checks with others, join our virtual Quad-Check at 8:00 am PT on Instagram. We also hold an Appreciation and Gratitude practice each day at 6:00 pm on Instagram.

Left Road, Right Road