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LINKS
CREDITS
Hosts: Matt Okine and Alex Dyson
Produced by: Bronwyn Dojcsak
Post Production: Linc Kelly
Find more great podcasts like this at www.listnr.com
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
A list-snuff production.
My God.
This is the end of the episode.
Is this the start of the episode?
Hello. Hello.
Alrighty.
Your microphone is not on.
Click on the button with the picture of the microphone.
Well, I'm a little bit disappointed, Alex Dyson,
that you spotted a little surprise
I brought in to the studio.
Yeah, I'll just sit in here.
You think just because we're in different studios right now,
you could get away with bringing a copy of the Apocalypse
that other borrowed inconveniences my new book into the studio.
Why have you got it open to about a fifth of the way through the book?
Listen, okay, I just thought we'd play a little fun game today.
That's all.
There's a game that we were playing at home during the week.
And I thought, well, why not bring it into the studio?
Oh my gosh, okay.
Okay, so I've been nervous here.
Yep, this is a copy of your book, Alex Dyson,
and we're going to play a little game later on.
Is this like when I asked you about the...
Did you put in your TV show?
You put something I'm like,
you definitely got that from the podcast.
Is it something like that?
What do you mean?
Remember what I said like?
What was that, Bron?
What did I say?
I caught Matt putting something in from the podcast into his...
Your dad.
Yeah, your dad said I'm just waiting for night to come.
And I...
It was in the game for a lot of mother and son.
I gave the line to Maggie, Denise.
That's it.
Um, yeah, no.
So look, I just figured we're having some fun at home.
Might as well bring it to work.
All right.
Fantastic, a little Tuesday quiz.
Let's get this show on the road.
Let's go.
Here we go.
Here we go.
Well, yes, I was...
I wanted to do a post yesterday about, like,
posting the front cover of the book with Maddo Kines.
Quote on it, because Matt, I got you the big dog,
shift a few units to get a nice quote from you on the front cover.
But I've given away my only, like, you know, proper new copy.
So I don't have a proper copy with your quote on the front of it.
Because you've got the advanced reading copy,
which doesn't have your quote yet, because they send that out to people
so you can read it and then give me a quote.
So then you get the quote, yeah.
Um, well, no, look, so, so Fiero has been playing at home a game
with Belinda just over the last couple of days.
And it's the old Spics and Specs game, you know?
Oh.
One of those games where you sing a song.
Yeah.
Substitute from Spics and Specs.
Is that what it's called?
I never know exactly what it's called.
But, um, you know, Sophie is just trying to wrap her head around the idea
of singing songs while, like, while reading other things.
Yes.
And so I figured, hey, we haven't played a little quiz on Matt and Alex for a little while.
I gotta, I'm looking at a copy of your book that's sitting on the kitchen counter,
I think, you know what?
Let's bring it out.
Okay.
Well, is it me versus producer Bron?
Yeah, I think it should be Bron, how you feeling?
I don't think I'll be good at this because I know songs and I don't know their title
or who it's by.
So I don't think that'll be helpful.
So we'll see how that goes.
All right.
Well, with the words from, um, what page are you on here, Matt?
I'm going to start a chapter four.
Yeah.
Or why it's okay for adults to say you've grown to me.
But when I say to my man, you've shrunk.
Suddenly, I'm a bad person.
That's the name of the first chapter.
Do you want to tell us what's happening in this, do you know what's happening in this bit?
Yeah.
This is where they've just made it to the city because Xavier, the lead character,
is going to boarding school and they're staying the night at his nan's place
before they hit the dorms.
Can I, a special request?
Don't do any obscure triple J songs I don't know.
Please.
Space J.
Space J.
Space J.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Let's start with an easy one.
Here we go.
And names are buzzers?
Yeah.
Your names are your buzzers.
Okay.
Here we go.
Round one.
Here we go.
Name this song.
My cheek hurts just as much as my ears as my shrieking grandmother.
Pinches it and tugs.
I probably shouldn't have gotten a better, better song.
What is that song?
What is that?
Is that just really bad singing or not a very well-known melody?
My cheek hurts just as much as my ears as my shrieking grandmother.
Pinches it and tugs.
Oh, my goodness little Xavier, look how big you've got.
It's unfair if I touched someone else like this.
My teacher would probably remind me of our online concert classes.
I'm so good at this watching speaks and specs and I'm like hang nail it every time.
What's the song?
Can anyone get it?
Can anyone get it?
You're listening right now.
I know what it is.
One.
That was Olivia Dean's song.
Unbelievable.
What?
What song was it?
It was...
Man I need.
No, it was...
That's the only one I know.
It isn't perfect but it might be.
All right, there we go.
That's the name of the song.
It's imperfect but it might be.
It isn't perfect but it might be.
You didn't know that one?
No.
Okay, that song before.
That was a hard one.
I specifically asked.
Olivia Dean's like huge.
She was in the news recently for leaving her hit song Rain Me In out of one of her shows.
Recently it's about eight weeks at the top of the chart.
She decided not to play it for her fans and people were up there.
It's a perfect but it might be.
It's not even in a top ten most played songs on Spotify.
What do you do?
You're giving us an Olivia Dean B side.
To try and guess the melody of whilst you're reading...
I can't get over this.
I can't get over this.
Source.
Oh my.
All right.
What about this?
Dude, Bohemian Rhapsody or something.
God, man.
There's chapter seven.
There's a fine line between board in school and boarding school.
Right.
Which I like as well.
Can you tell us what's happening in this in this chapter?
He's a boarding school.
Gee, someone's a bit cranky far out.
Why would I win this guy?
Come on.
Okay.
Here we go.
What did it name this song?
Round two.
We don't have to go that soon.
I was just the first to wake.
Up and I got the impending sense that hope was going to jump out of the cupboard.
Singing some sort of rise and shine.
I think so.
I think so.
You're doing Missy Higgins' scar.
Missy Higgins' scar is correct.
Correct.
Yay.
Unbelievable.
Very good.
All right.
Do we want to have one more?
God, was everyone sick of this?
I was brought to sing a song.
No.
Final round.
Final round.
Please.
Okay.
Here we go.
What about this?
Let's just say I'll go to the front page of the ABC News website.
I'll sing scar by Missy Higgins on an article that says Angus Taylor avoids backing ASIO
amid moves by ISIS-linked families to return for Australia.
Government action needs to be taken to prevent a group of Australian families from links to former ISIS fighters.
From re-entering the country, opposition leader Angus Taylor is for women.
What's your point?
What is your point?
Are you trying to say that you're better singing than I am or what?
What is the point of this?
100%.
That's what I'm saying.
Better card.
Ron, do you back this up?
You know what?
I actually knew what the song was then and I still was like, I don't think I would have got that either.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Okay.
What about this?
Name this song.
Round three.
Good morning, everyone.
And welcome to you.
Seven Missy Freiborn poses.
Oh, it's outstretched as though she's expecting a cheer.
The room is silent, so she drops her hands.
Angus, I've said hello to a couple of you already, but my name is Missy Freiborn.
42.
When I use the pronouns, I have a wife named Peter.
I can't name Dick Beatt and I'm going to be your former teacher this year.
And I'll also be teaching you English and history.
So you'll be seeing a lot of me and you will know.
Oh, is that Savage Garden?
Yes, it is Savage Garden.
Yes, it is.
It is.
Oh, my God.
I just think it's like, it's on a song.
Oh, God, God, God.
David, I'm thinking towards everything I see still.
Thank you.
It's like a Chicachete called it.
You know, I want you, Ron.
But you know, I know if I need you, Ron.
Can we confirm that you knew that song at least?
I know, I still don't know the name of it, what is it?
I want you by Savage Garden.
All right, speaking of BBC's insiders, programmes,
to tell us anything in interest,
there's security, had to be put in there,
people who's left, the country, it's a port of.
All right, all right.
My God.
This is the end of the episode, yeah.
This is the start of the episode, yeah.
This is the beginning of the episode.
This is how we welcome people to the podcast.
And if this is the first time listening, welcome.
Expect this.
All right.
Expect years more of this.
It's not going to get better.
Yeah, we can do this more of this, for sure.
Okay.
I probably should have done international songs as well,
should not.
No.
Love Aussie songs.
I'll see music.
To the Australian book.
Get Australian songs.
Fair call.
Although you did do Olivia Dean,
that's not what we didn't know was the international one.
Yeah.
No, it didn't occur to me that that song wasn't one of her
more popular ones.
All right.
Now, look, what have we got?
Come to my booklaunch, Immortable on Friday night,
or Melbourne on Saturday.
That's the whole point of why I wanted to play that game,
by the way, to remind you to go to Alex Dyson's booklaunch
in Melbourne or Warnable.
Okay, yourself a copy.
If you ordered now, it should come by next week, probably,
for most of these joints.
Very exciting.
Order up.
Just how you like it, it's perfect.
So Alex Dyson, we had some friends over on the weekend,
and we were in that moment between,
probably for the first time that's ever happened,
in recent memory, where there was a gap between us
getting everything ready and the friends arriving.
Okay, yeah.
Because you know when you go, you're like,
oh, we've got friends coming over,
and then like that last 10 minutes before they're supposed
to come is like, just the most chaotic,
pretty frantic, mad rush of all time.
All composure goes out the window,
and everyone's scrambling to finish their bits and pieces
and stuff.
Well, I ran into a friend recently.
Well, a friend of Karen and Reese's,
who was a comedy republic,
and I'm like, oh, a public conversation
the last time I heard about that friend was wed.
Karen and Reese went to their place for dinner,
but for whatever reason got the time wrong,
rocked up to their place at 3 p.m.,
and they were getting ready
because they were expecting them at 7 p.m. for dinner.
Oh my god.
So literally press the buzzer at 3 p.m.
I was like, hey, is it going?
He's like, can you give us 10 minutes?
And then just tied it up a few things.
Yeah, come in.
And they did realize until about 45 minutes
he had that they'd gotten the time wrong.
Oh my god.
That would, I think Belinda would have a proper breakdown
that happened.
She would just, no, should you go, no,
get up, tell them to just go out.
Bronnie, do you freak out in these situations?
Or you can pose as Steve the freak out, Aurora?
No, I definitely freak out.
I'm more of a day-to-day, more chill
and Steve's a bit more on top of things.
And then, but with we're having people over,
I'm like, no.
We are getting shit done so quickly.
And properly.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So we were in that phase.
But because we were so aware that
so often we're scrambling for the last few minutes.
And we also didn't want to spend the whole time
of our friends being over doing the cooking,
you know, when you're like, yeah, okay.
And that's always really annoying.
You're trying to have a conversation
but you don't want to burn the past nuts.
Yeah, exactly.
So we really got everything ready.
And then we just waited.
And then it turned out our friends
were running half an hour late anyway.
So then we were just like, oh, so we're sitting there.
Porcifee is just lying on the floor,
literally the way that a seven-board, seven-year-old does,
just like rolling around in discomfort from her boredom.
Just like, oh, so bored, right?
Yeah.
And like, does that mean that dinner's going to be served
half an hour later as well?
Because as a, you know, seven-year-old or something,
that's bordering on the worst news I would have experienced
in my life at that time.
Well, the chips are just sitting in a bowl on the table, you know.
And it's like, you can't eat those until...
Yeah.
...the guests arrive and...
Ah!
So anyways, we're like, well, what do you want to do?
Like, you know, just, what do you want to do?
And for whatever reason, she said, can we just walk to the shop
and back?
And we were like, yeah, but the shop's closed,
because it ends that day.
And she said, yeah, that's fine.
I just want to walk there and back.
Yeah.
It's like a five-minute walk there, five-minute back.
And we're like...
There we go.
Ian Dyson would approve.
Get your steps up.
Yeah, right?
So steps in the back.
I was like, wonder why she wanted to do that.
But anyway, she did it.
And it was nice.
But then she can't...
Because then you all did it.
Or just...
Or her and Belinda...
Okay.
I was finishing off some prep for the food.
But then Sophia walks back through the door and goes, guess what?
I just found $2.20.
And I was like, how good is that?
I mean, one, you never find money these days.
Two.
For whatever reason, she just decided that she wanted to go for a walk.
And that's how the universe rewarded her.
Geez.
$2.20.
I mean, to find the two coins as well, that's a rarity.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The double drop coin drop.
Because that would make more of a noise on the ground as well.
So that...
That event sort of kickstarted this conversation
when the friends did come of when have you found money?
When have the universe rewarded you?
Oh, there you go.
I mean, I remember finding $40 on the ground once.
And when I was walking across the shops, when I was 10 years old,
$2.20 notes stacked on top of each other in the gutter,
if you don't mind.
That's not bad.
My universe rewarding me story.
It's almost made me a believer, right?
In this cosmic justice that we all have.
Okay.
I was away with a few friends in lawn.
Okay, this is in the days of prepaid internet.
For most people, that's about 2008.
For Matt O'Conn, that bought us a bit later.
But this was 2008.
Okay.
Went to a particularly branded service station
to purchase $30 of credit for my phone.
All right.
And I used to print out a receipt.
All right.
It's all our Gen Z listeners.
Yes.
The server person would hand you over a receipt,
which had a code on it.
And then you'd type that code into your phone
and your phone would be replenished
with $30 worth of credit,
which you could spend 25 cents per text
of 156 characters.
Otherwise, you would go to two pages of tests
and it would be a 50 cent text.
And you'd do everything you could.
Oh, yes.
Keep it to white.
Oh, you could use ars become ars.
Bees are single bees.
What do you think?
I made a money.
No, no, no.
We're trimming.
But went there, went home to put it in.
They said, sorry.
This code is not acceptable.
They'd sold me an already used prepaid receipt.
Oh, you're still in the shop when that happens?
No, I was back at home.
No.
I can't text anyone.
Because my bloody, I don't have any credit on my phone.
Okay.
Those were the guys.
That was actually the good old days
where that was a very valid excuse
for not texting someone back you didn't want to talk to.
Oh, sorry.
I was out of credit.
But I don't have that anymore, which is the same.
So unbelievable.
I'm like, we're 30 bucks.
Like, what do you do?
You go back and say, I didn't use it.
They're like, well, how do I know?
I'm like, oh, you...
This petrol station has dogged me.
Did you see them printed?
Or was it one of those ones in it sometimes
they used to have the pre...
You see, I wasn't paying attention to that.
Right.
Maybe person printed it.
Maybe the person behind the desk had done that.
But this petrol station, oh, I was annoyed at them.
Anyway.
Back in Melbourne.
Which, not that long later.
Only a few weeks later, which makes it, you know,
you know, the universe works quite quickly.
In the same brand of petrol station.
Right.
When and got some food, it needed to get some money out.
This is the days where cash...
You could...
You carried around cash.
I needed to get...
And you could purchase something.
And then I'll get some cash out as well.
You pay more.
They hand over the cash.
Got $60 out.
The person hands me this stack of 20s.
Leave the shop.
He'd given me 80.
Oh.
Same brand petrol station was paying for their original era.
The universe had made them give me 66% of what they owed me.
And I was like, man.
Maybe there is a...
Maybe there's a higher power out there.
Just look enough to the little guy, you know?
Do you give...
Do you give that back in that instance?
Absolutely not.
Absolutely not.
I'm still in debt at this point.
They still owe me 10.
You know?
But I remember...
You know, I was...
I think I was in the shop when I realised.
But it was so soon to the previous incidents.
I think I've been thinking about what I walked in.
I was like...
You were still stinging for sure.
Damn.
This is incredible.
Um, Brian, how do you feel about this?
Should Alex have given the money back?
I feel like anything sort of user error,
I take it as a sign from the universe like,
I meant to have this.
Exactly what I mean.
Did Sophia give the $2.20 back?
Did she hand that into the police?
Um...
Oh, no, of course...
No, no, no, no.
Of course not.
I would never...
I would never raise an honest child like that.
Yeah.
Not in this family.
No, don't ever mind.
She'll be doing that.
No, no one's handing in money
unless it's so much money that it could risk your life.
Yeah.
It's when you start finding like thousands of dollars
you go, okay, I need to...
I can't be of like, at risk of crime here.
All those stories like...
I think in New Zealand is one of the more...
the last couple of years, some bank error.
Like $150,000 is deposited in the account or whatever.
When they realize they go to talk to the person's fled,
they're like, I gotta get out of here.
I gotta change my name.
What do I do?
It's like, off they go.
So one of the stories that did come up
within the group of friends is...
One of our friends had found...
And it was funny because we discussed whether this was...
something they should feel guilty about.
They did feel guilty about it kind of at the time.
But they had found a wallet that had $20 in it.
And they took the $20 and handed the wallet in.
How do we feel about that?
Yeah.
For me, because the owner of the wallet
hadn't wronged me personally in the lead up,
I reckon you gotta hand it in with the money.
You gotta hand it in with the money.
Bruno, how do you feel about it?
This was many years ago, by the way.
They were young, much younger, and you know, all that.
Yeah, I reckon if it's someone's personal wallet,
I'm not stealing from people.
I'd steal from a big corporation.
Happily.
Come sit on check, Tom's bag on the way out of work today, please.
I don't even know if I look at a person to person
without a stealing 20 bucks or something.
Well, one of my earliest memories.
I remember it would have been probably Sophia's age.
Around that age, we found a wallet in Warnamble
and there was money in it, but we kept the money in it,
gave it back to the dude.
It was Paul Katch, former Jolong player.
The drop to his wallet.
Oh, there you go.
Give it back.
Get it, Paulie.
Big fan of the show, Paul.
As someone who, if I were to lose my wallet
and a 20-year-old uni student were to find it,
I am giving full authorization.
Take the 20.
Guys, take the 20.
I promise you.
Do you still carry cash in a wallet?
I had to get some cash out just on the weekend
because of a Facebook marketplace purchase.
Oh, there we go.
So, yeah, so the amount of Facebook marketplace in going on,
I'd be a fool not to have cash in my wallet at all times
buying and selling.
It's all happening.
So, yeah, I reckon take the 20.
I reckon it's worth it because no one,
$20 to not have to reapply for my credit cards.
Yeah, but you could also do that
and still have the 20.
No, take it.
I'm not saying you should do it.
I'm just saying, if it happened,
and that person a uni student did take it,
I'd be like, yeah, whatever.
I get it.
I think it's one of those things as well.
If someone gets their wallet back and there's still money,
they're like, oh my God, thank you for finding it.
Here, have this.
And it's a much simpler trend.
There's a finders reward which I think a lot of people
who are in that situation would probably give the money
rather than have it taken.
We asked you.
Tell us your money finding stories.
Polly got in touch with us, said I found cash in an ATM twice.
Nobody else is nearby.
See, that doesn't happen very often.
Michelle said a lady was running a brothel,
a few blocks away from my house.
One morning walking my dog found a $100 note
on the footpath right at the front.
It was shut down a few months later.
It says like one of the runaway with a knapsack
and there's money flowing out the back.
A two says I moved house and hanging up my jeans.
I found $200 in one of the pockets.
Chloe says I found $50 that someone was using as a bookmark
in a library book.
Thank you.
Oh, no.
I'm using a $5 note as a bookmark currently at home.
Are you actually?
It's not a library book, but yeah.
The Australian money is a great bookmark.
Who are these people?
I can't believe.
All right, Mr. Moneybag.
He's just chucking your money.
Five bucks is not quite there.
Once I've used it 50 years of bookmark,
then you can call me Mr. Bodybag.
Probably Professor Moneybag at that point.
Mel says my sister found a $50 note in the bush
near our house when we were kids.
We told our parents and they bought us barbie roller skates
for being honest.
Wow.
That's pretty good.
Oh, that's a good little reward, isn't it?
That's a nice life lesson.
And finally, Bonnie got in touch with us and said
my house got broken into and they took an empty jewelry box
and some chocolates.
I found the jewelry box outside the week after the robbery
with a note that said sorry and $50 inside.
What?
Are you kidding me?
What?
Amazing.
The guilt.
The guilt had happened.
I've never heard of a robber's guilt before.
Geez.
The robber's guilt has struck.
That person spent $50 to steal something.
Yeah.
Unless they sold the jewelry and got a heaps of money for it
and were like, you know, I probably should split this.
Yeah, I'll take my commission,
but here's your guy's cut of the loot.
Well, there you go.
We wish you all the best luck today with your eyes peeled
on the ground, looking for some of that cash.
Thank you for listening to another episode of Matt.
Now, I saw their breakfast.
Don't forget, you have until 2 p.m. today.
Two vote for Australia's best loosest news moment.
You'd need to get your vote in.
Have your say.
Yeah.
If you're listening to it on the day of release,
make sure you're hitting up our Instagram
and making your voice heard for our three finalists.
This is democracy manifest.
Go joy and off my penis!
Let there be a thousand blossoms blooms, folks, I'm sorry.
But I ain't spending any time, why not?
Because every three months a person is torn to pieces
by a crocodile in North Queensland.
They came bounding over.
One of the biggest triple headers in Australian competition history
makes sure you're there.
If you're listening to this podcast, not on the day of record,
we'll be back tomorrow.
Tomorrow's episode will have the triumphant victor.
Can I say something as well?
Certainly, Brian.
I have a Canadian friend and this was such a good education for her.
This whole competition.
You have an international friend who doesn't know all this stuff.
It is such a good watch to just see them watching this stuff
for the first time.
It is a very, very good.
I'm glad that our, well, eccentricities,
the Aussie eccentricities can be welcomed by the world.
It's perfect.
And that we can showcase them to your friend and many others
around this globe.
Thank you so much for listening to another episode of Matt.
Now it's all day breakfast.
We are going to be back tomorrow, same time, same place.
Bye-bye!
Matt and Alex - All Day Breakfast
