Side Stories: Snack Attack w/ Jackie Zebrowski

There's no place to escape to. This is the last talk on the left side stories

Side stories yes

Dude I had fucking I gotta listen to what happened to me this week

I was in San Francisco. I had a show at the punchline. Love you punchline. Great time. Absolutely. Also sorry to Alaska

Can't wait cannot wait to be back there in April April. We are gonna come back

We promise we're definitely coming this time and it's not it's not not happening we're coming. We've rescheduled

This is very scheduled. We're coming. Um, but while I was in San Francisco

I was slumming it a little bit. I took in Uber X and

Arrab four showed up and at first I'm like my wife's with me. I don't want to get in this fucking thing

Did you I was like the driver? I was like just worried that like you know, it wouldn't

Move I was surprised it got to me. Honestly. I'm afraid to even put a woman in Arrab four. Yes

So it had um one of those like rearview mirrors. That's like a camera

Instead of like a rearview mirror. You know what I'm talking about. It was filming you it was filming it was filming your consent

No, it was filming the back. Oh, it was filming the people behind us without their consent

But it was really nice and it seemed

I had a nice time in the RAV4 and I think that I've learned something

As it because we've got a lot of messages a lot of people say we're very insensitive

Recently, yeah, yeah, we get really insensitive about how we've been talking about the RAV4

And you know a lot of people have RAV4s and that's okay

And I've been really sitting with a lot of people's opinions about the RAV4

and kind of

self

adjudicating

Yeah, about whether if I'm good or not thinking about the RAV4

And like yes

I'm great. Yeah, but maybe not when it comes to the RAV4

I'm sitting in that RAV4 with my wife and at first I'm mad as hell

And then I'm looking around. I'm like this ain't that bad. She wasn't screaming. No, she was just like at least it's not a Corolla

Wow, yeah, and so we were you know, we were we commiserated in that

And I and we got to the place and we got out of the car. We got you to where you were going

We were going. It got us to where we were going weird. I put even put some luggage in the back

It was it worked and you could sit I sat on the seat

belt the had a belt a seat belt

Erickson was had all the seatbelts and well, I didn't check the middle

But julie and I were both secure. Well, you're big enough to normally need the two. Yes. I know

I know and usually I'm big enough to not even need one because my shoulders are touching either door

The roll cage. Yes

Your body's

Touching your roll cage itself. So I'm saying that I've learned and I've grown to know

That if you drive a RAV4 you shouldn't have to call 988. Wow

Guys, this is one of the biggest

People come at us all the time and they're always so thankful about how we grow. Yes, all right

And then usually it's just sideways and sometimes we start small right we start small

Maybe there's a little procedure that might in kind of

discourage your full growth. Mm-hmm, but we got

Just enough growth. I think on this subject. Yeah, RAV4

drivers

We're not sorry, but we're thinking about saying we're sorry. Yeah, we're thinking about you and how hard your life must be

stuck in that

Horrible can and honestly I feel like

The care that should be taken for you is just the same amount of care that the Baptist took

Yeah, to really carve out the and make sure a really special place for everybody feel comfortable in that room

Know what I think would be a really nice thing for us to do a cause for us

Helmets for people who have to drive and ride in RAV4 honestly that be nice helmets and then

If there was like a cork like situation for their mouths and it's not to silence them. No, it's to protect their teeth

With a bite on it. Yeah, yeah, yeah for when the airbags come out because their airbags all full of sand

This is side stories my name is Henry Zabrowski. I'm sitting here with Ed Larson and we have re adjudicated our opinion on the RAV4

You're welcome. You're welcome, and this has just been like

There's so many been so many learning opportunities this week for growth. Yeah, we got all kinds of updates and we took one we did

I took it. Yeah, we are a better

Person I'm better person he is I'm better person because I was in a RAV4 also. I do want to say I'm sorry to Frederick Brennan

Hey, I slandered quite a bit right before he died. So he died of course we talked about oh my god that guy yes

The creator of a chan the guy that did start life off in a bad way

But then did his best to pull the nose up and try to discourage young men from getting radicalized on the internet

And then everything he could Frederick Brennan he passed. Oh

Yeah, he's dead. Wow. I can't believe you were just making fun of that guy. Yeah, but so it goes

This isn't a funny and a bad not funny. It's actually not funny. I'm sorry. No, no

Yeah, unfortunately he did pass because unfortunately Peyton Manning did use him as a long ball. Oh, yeah

That's just me just trying to obviously

Hide my pain with last Jeff Saturday

Use them and then he Jeff Saturday gave him to Peyton Manning. Thank you. That's was Peyton Manning center

Wow

So again, sorry to that guy

And we got some updates. I think we got a couple updates and we can go in before the updates before the updates

We got normal updates hold your finger off that

You wait your god damn ass

They fucking charge the brother in the shit in the cruise ship murder

All right, so first of all we want to say congratulations to the police. They finally got their man

So when we arrive last year

This is not just a plug for crime wave at C-2.0

Not certainly not the cops are on the boat. Please everyone jump off because guess what no step sister got strangled to death on Royal Caribbean that we get no

This is a carnival cruise activity. We know that that is what they do over there. Okay, life was in limbo

You got to be careful over there. So we now know the Anna Kempner who was a lovely young lady

Was on a carnival cruise

docked at the dock the same weekend we docked yeah after the crime wave at C-1.0 there were cops everywhere

There were cops everywhere. We didn't know what was going on. This young lady was murdered by right now

They're accusing her stepbrother and what they this is actually finally happened because they've been kind of

Tipped towing around actually charging the younger brother

The funniest part about this story is the parents were all like oh, yeah, he did it

As soon as everyone threw him under the bus everybody was like oh, he's a fucking creepazoid. He was obsessed with her absolutely

Yeah, then why can I ask

Did you make him a roommate on a carnival cruise? I want to say four out of five

Brothers scenarios. Yeah, involve step brothers and sisters on cruise. Honestly. This is like and I think that

It's like that's it was just not good to do. I mean not everyone has enough money for multiple state rooms

I'm not saying this is not what he sleeps with her in there or someone's coming into the parents room or somebody else

Goes in the air besides the stepbrother that is sexually obsessed with the step sister was he sexually obsessed

I think he was just like me never and beat her up all the time

That's what they said, but also that's how young boys flirt. Yeah

What I think ask the fucking Christian church at the Catholic church

Yes, how the boys flirt

They're always fighting and kicking

That's how they're doing. That's how they say yes to a priest

I mean, this is a fucking crazy story. It's like everyone's god damn nightmare

You're on vacation and one of your family members gets killed by another family. Oh, yes, it's fucking horrific

This is a horrific the the the the the the the woman working the the housekeeper found

Yes, because he strangled her to death and will allegedly strangled her to death and stuff shoved her underneath the bunk

What I think happened is they were rough housing and he took it too far and accidentally killed her and then tried to hide her body

That's my personal like that's me putting my like stupid like I wasn't there detective glasses on

Of course, we have no idea what goes on, but I do think that also a or

Did he try to do something weird and then try to shut her up?

And kill her in the process of it

Man, I don't know ain't good. It's not good either way. Guess where it didn't happen

Royal Caribbean. That's what you're gonna want to go to crime wave and see 2.0

Because on our I'm telling you we're gonna control the true crime on our cruise

Yeah, and we're gonna have CCTV cameras on the carnival cruise ship so we can watch the crimes as they happen

Live stream crime from carnival cruises on to the absolutely idyllic perfect royal Caribbean cruise line

Don't look them up in the Epstein files

No, you don't look it up. No, don't look it up, but just know that there's a

Boats sort of not to play him

Boats aren't to play for islands. Boats have done as much good as they've done harm. Yes, ask the lucetania

Ask the monitor and the marimax. Ask the Titanic. They know

They know down in the old

Valdez so go to crime wave at c.com slash left by tickets

We're gonna have so much fucking fun in this cruise and I swear to god the only stepbrothers and step sisters

We are gonna allow to choke each other all the performers that we invite with us that play those family members

On television. That's right. Yep. That's right. So the television enemy pornography. Yeah, and that's you know

free

Another update

Austin the yogurt shop murderers have been completely exonerated. It's kind of crazy

That it took this long because now that one guy got booked who died right the guy that we know that did the yogurt land murders

He was dead already because they did that with like by there was DNA

Science later on the fact, but they did actually say I'm sorry to the OG guys

Well, how about they give him some fucking money, you know, he took 30 years of their god damn life. You'd think that

I know that now like it seems like complicated. There's really another like, you know that that guy arctane that actor

Or they put a big go fund me after he died for his family, and then we know how much money did Vanderbake get?

Oh my god. It was James Vanderbake got like several millions of dollars after they bought that ranch and after they did

You know, we know that he's like he was his wife was like an alternative health person than James Vanderbake

Essentially dumped millions of dollars since an alternative health things that could have cured

He had curable cancer and he ultimately died of it. It's really sad

But that's why I feel like would go fund me's

Maybe for people that aren't

Previously rich and famous. Yeah, I think that this could be a good use for a go fund me that would be an interesting

Yeah, if you were to do that. I'm not setting it up. No, I'm not somebody else could if someone

I mean these guys deserve money. They do if you would give them money. I would I mean

I wrote down if someone sat it up. Yeah, sure. I throw it down at least 50 for these fuckers

But they should sue the government. We should. Oh, absolutely

If you have an opportunity to sue the government always sue the government

I'd sucks that the taxpayers have to pay for it, but get yours baby. Hey man

Who cares? It all fucking comes out the washers fake money anyway. All the money's fucking ones and zeros and a fucking

Money that real no, so I got to ask you about this Henry

This is important before we get to our updates and I just need your natural opinion. We do also have an update

An update. Oh another update. Well the other the thing I have to ask you about is two presidents

This week have said aliens are real

How do you feel about it?

First of all Barack Obama was being extremely flippant

When he said a UFOs were real

He did it in the spirit of the stupid podcast he was on he was trying to be fun and cool

And guess what he is ultimately at disappointing mess like was what we found right as a country, right?

Remember when we all be on the day basis that and so Barack Obama said that UFOs were real

He did it very flippantly, but that aliens are real and he didn't say UFOs are real

And then he yes, you're right and then he rolled it all back afterwards saying statistically

Of course, they would be real and then he said they're not a dairy of 51

Which is I know that I knew that anybody who's plugged in knows that Obama. I didn't know that

Because they're right Paterson

Right yeah, so then we have our do you believe Obama more than Bob Lazar? No

Really you believe a Bob Lazar more than Obama if there was somebody who actually got closer to the whatever the fakery that is going on

Into the center of this they let Bob Lazar much closer to it because it would only make the president sound like a moron

Yeah, like literally they couldn't have him

Even know they couldn't even know that we were spending millions of dollars creating technology that was just mimicking

The visuals of UFOs even back then yeah, so he would even it wouldn't even matter

So now we have obviously our current president the pedophile is

Now he's doing this new thing right another distraction. I'm not even calling it a distraction anymore

There is no distraction no he's no there are no

Everybody really everything he doesn't says sucks. It's just also he has no thought behind it

Yeah, every single thing is off the back of his fucking head

He's got dementia

He is got nothing he has no idea what's going on so he has been openly floating

Saying he's like well, I've got this speech

Saying aliens are real that I'm just waiting for the right time to say it

So he's like saying he's like floating it

But he also said that Obama released classified information because he has no

Literal idea what the living fuck he's talking about. It's because he's trying to generate a

Headline no one's buying it

It makes me believe in less any single thing he'd say into a microphone

is not

Gonna answer anything you really think

He's gonna say something of substance at this point. I mean, I feel like if anyone's gonna release this information

It's Trump. No, it's not it's the anything that he would release is something that has been

Carefully packaged and handed to him you think so yes, you don't think he's just gonna flippantly be like

This is you know, they're all gone or it doesn't exist

Like anything that would really be like like that level that level like if you believe

The UFO lore if we actually believe the big mother load lore. Yeah, that we've had these things since the 1950s

Yeah

We got some advances in technology. We've starting to maybe make some things that look like UFOs

Yeah, I think we're at the same ground level. We were

Fucking 70 years ago and I think that your guy you have a bunch of now the worst of the worst of the worst that are gonna try to

talk about

one of the most

Powerful mysteries of our reality. Yeah, we don't know how this reality works

We don't know where we're at we don't know why they're the whole universe is it filled with endless life

We don't know why they don't know why he has no fucking idea what's going on anything

He'd say wouldn't matter it makes me not care about disclosure

One bit this is literally I just watched Jeremy Corbell and George nap just had a brand new great piece

Of UFO footage out of Syria unweaponized and

It's I watch it you could actually see the thing you can see this thing go stop you could see it go back at forward

You could see take off and I mean it's like really good footage and

It don't quite make me as hard as it used to yeah, what do you think's going on? Oh just cuz it's cuz the world's on fire

I thought that otherwise it's that it's making me understand what are the mysteries

Actually here and what are the important mysteries and the important mysteries are

You just coming out and trying to just say something about aliens like obviously is just such a deep

smoke screen

For whatever's going on yeah

And he's just gonna say the smoke screen and it doesn't matter and the fact that he is got this in his back pocket

And he's flippantly talking about it like it's deciding whether or not there's gonna be a season three of a television show

Also shows just how important this is to them okay

So we should really also think about that if he has the speech and he's waving and around threatening to give it

How important is that speech? Yeah, obviously not because he already told us all he has it because he's a fucking moron

And is it Obama making an alien documentary? He's doing anything but helping

He's literally anything but anything useful as an ex-president he'll he'll do

Yeah

All right, so

But yeah, that's my problem a problem makes me upset

I think that the the the very center of this is the mystery that we'll never explain and I think we can shelve it for a couple years

Wow, I think that at this point what we are seeing is

evidence of every single

piece of conspiracy theory thought

That has been ridiculed that has been put out and we are now watching in real time be exposed

And nothing

Is more important than that story. Yeah, and with that

We go get out of this

Maybe hit our fucking music my

It's an island adventure. It's an island adventure

Hey, yeah, it's Jeffrey time

Oh my god, so I made it through about a half an hour of less Wexner's deposition. Oh, this is what you want to start with

So this fucking piece of fucking shit. I have never oh my god. Natalie hurt me in the other room

I'm just watching this really not very good at keeping a secret dude. Oh my god

So I'm in the room. I sound like I'm at the Baptist, right? I'm just yelling at my screen

I'm just sitting here. I'm watching him talk and I'm just going mother fucker mother fucker

You know like it's over and over again like I need a documentary made about me. Yeah, and not enough laughter at the bathtub, right?

I'm so serious

And so I went and I

I'm cursing at this motherfucker less Wexner

He has a disability now. I'm seeing this thing and I

The next man Greer them when an old man that is he goes from he wants he's he when he leaves that deposition room

Which also had members of they were supposed to have members of Congress, right? None of the Republican showed up

They sent all their assistants four Democrats showed up. I guess just because they had nothing to do

I don't know right they were there. I feel like the Democrats should be busy and the Republicans should be that whatever

That's the most important story of the century. Oh, yeah, who fucking know if you fucking idiots

So less Wexner is getting talked at by these guys and all he does is he goes from

The most powerful billionaire, right? He talks about it in one way when you see him on the news. Yeah, and he goes in there

He is the most aw shucks

Oh, I couldn't even tell you what jeffery was doing

You don't have that type of money to act like that that mother fucking liar

Lied through his teeth. He's laughing

Joking about what's going on. He openly says. I don't think Trump and Epstein were friends

He said he never knew Epstein personally every single time they brought up an email that said like here's him saying stuff like

You and I are embedded together in a crime

Organization and we need to act like it like literally saying out loud. Yeah, keep going

I don't know what he's referring to in these. I don't know what he's talking about in this just the most just like I can't even

I kind of talked about like

Just like so what happened when you found out did jeffery Epstein was stealing money from you

They were trying to find out like a dollar amount and he wouldn't give it to him

It's always like oh, you know

Everything went into chaos when we found out jeffery was a crook and it's like

They just are and what we know that

They forced less wexner force the farmer girl the girl that was

Kidnapped yeah, and kept on the Columbus grounds where less wexner's house was where he allowed jeffery Epstein to live

Next to his house was where she was kept captive and then was forced to change her driver's license to the address of less wexner's house

That seems like hard evidence

right

But he looked at it and he's just like never happened don't know these people don't know what's going on

Just managed to delete everything and then we have the very famous moment where his lawyer Michael Levy

Says if you answer another question with more than five words

I'm gonna fucking kill you

Yeah, the thing is funny enough is that

That the obviously just a clip alone is so deeply enraging right even just watching them joking because he was funny and

Tudid is right in that moment he was talking about how Epstein gave financial advice to Google

Well, that's when he was throwing it that was the one time he threw people under the bus

He threw Jeff Bezos under the bus he threw Google under the bus and he threw Bill Clinton under the bus

There's the only three names he dared mention right now. They're all coming for Clinton because Clinton actually did cut him off in

2008, but I will say I was listening

This is one of those things that are all comes together in ways. He don't understand

So part of what I do to shut my brain off and the crowd knows this

You just keep watching Epstein files. I know but like

So I've been also trying to cut off my body cam footage. I'm trying to like

So I unfortunately I do I listen to old Howard Sterns to just kind of

Delete my brain right I found a bunch of archives of the complete episodes and I listened to them to just sort of relax

I watched this fun documentary about elephant stepping on landmines

Go ahead. Yep. Oh, so they what happened?

They lose their legs and they get prosthetics. It's actually very

Laughing about this is funny for you or it's funny talking about it now. Yes, but the the documentary itself is very upsetting

Yeah, well of course um

But in 2003 they were like offhandedly talking about

Bill Clinton

doing this thing

with

It was ping pong balls. I mean basically

He was him talking about like they were all talking about how he was working with this

young recent high school graduate that big one this like science award

It was like 19 years old and they kept talking about how he was like all over her

And he was like touching her and like doing all the kind of stuff and you can kind of see you like oh, yeah

There's that rapist. Do you think you thought she's maybe you thought she's saxophone? Who knows. I mean she was gold

Very gold

But I made it through about an hour of the less wixner stuff and then I jumped to clips and it's

So deeply responsible and basically what it comes out is is that he is obviously he's the the simplest old man

Awshocks just a he's just a businessman. Yeah, Awshocks. He only like made lingerie the most popular item

He also was very obviously a closet. He's a closet homosexual that is I thought he was out

No, cuz he's

Just brilliantly in love with his wife. Oh, okay. All he does is hide behind his wife

There's like I know people mark us was even getting on me about that about even saying that it's just more just

The only reason why you've been bringing up that about him is you're watching him hide behind his wife

Yeah, cuz he keep the whole time. He's like what my wife would have had nothing to do with that

Yeah, and he keeps doing this thing like his wife kept him out of trouble

That's what all these motherfuckers are doing and it's just why fucking his lanes the only one in prison just lanes a

fucking she open she's gonna

When she gets out of jail, I don't know what she's gonna do, but it's it's gonna be bad

I think that whatever we we need to keep more than close eyes on just lane

I also have gotten a lot of feedback because

Honestly, people were like why are you mispronouncing Pam Bondy's name as that truly I had no

Interested learning it. Yeah, and when I first I never you guys have to understand guys is that I am it's what they deserve

I'm new to actually reading the news news. Yeah, right? I don't the news news

It's not something I normally had to pay attention to I very rarely even cared about who was district attorney and all these

Fucking people because I was a piece of shit. We need to be going back to a Buffalo Wild Wings being able to sell boneless wings under the name boneless

Yes, that's our terror that was my terror to be able to get to that today

So I'm learning about this. I'm learning things. So now I know her that I know that cunt's name is Pam Bondy

All right, and I hope she gets torn apart by dogs yes, so that's it

This is all just to try to add more mystery because people don't or actually

Don't want to talk about the real stuff like how Jeffrey Epstein and just Lane Maxwell went to the very very high end and basically

We're one of the main donors for about a decade of this very very fancy private economy called interlocking

Which is where chapel rone went I want you guys to remember this too. Oh, this is one of those little things that you like forget

Yeah, as people right any and I were talking about this just in this this fear about how we're lucky

Few chance saying no

kept us out of really bad places because you felt like a feeling about a guy

Yes, now that you now know was on the Epstein list. You didn't hang out with him. Yes. Thank it's weird, right?

How like all these things are all connected interlocking is one of those places where would you ever wonder why

A starlit appears out of nowhere, right? Like you wonder why like oh my god was given to us was was past

She had like she like showed up at some big Hollywood party and like played guitar

She was walking down the stairs. She has a song written a song was given to her. She wrote the whole she came down

It was a whole Jennifer Lawrence was given was created right just great

You know stop there's no the wrong just remembering that every single time you are one of you at one of these elite things

You actually do have quite a potential to rub up against some of the most

Fucking despicable people in the face of the planet. Yeah because money seems to bring them. Yeah

Harvey Weinstein was at all the same events as Jeffrey Epstein while they were both donating to Democrats

Yes, we know that they were on the other side and they did that to fucking cover up for themselves

So interlocking the interlocking center for the arts is this amazing idyllic

Now I guess it's about a hundred years old. It's outside of Traverse City and it has a large amount of celebrity

The all these like celebrities kind of came out of it. There's a lot of people that went and trained their trapperones one

I just kind of brought it up in the fact that like

You just be surprised who gets if you get to the right places who has access to you

And then what people want to go to julyard of course. It's because it's there. It's like

There's and it has a pipeline. There's like a thing you're getting involved Harvard in an institution

Jeffrey Epstein did the same thing. So he would go and he like so he gave them he donated this building to interlocking

And then he from I guess it was called Zorro Ranch. Oh God I wish

And from 94 and 2000 he uh spade he would go and stay at interlocking with jislane

And then what they would do is they would walk a little dog a little terror a little Yorkshire terror

And they would walk and they would find a freshman

And they would talk to him and then they'd get to know him and they'd bring him out to the private house

start to groom him

happen

Many many many times of course the school said we never had any complaints

Yeah, which is you know mostly just because these things is that we don't understand is that in order for them to have a complaint

They have to receive the complaint and then enter it

Yeah, into some form of book or some care about it. They have to

Say it's a complaint. So what they can do is say

They didn't get any complaints even though we have one mother basically

There's one may I had a whole crusade against Jeffrey Epstein right while during all that so a while this was happening

And they hushed it all up right he gave 400 grand to this to the place or a decade

They now disavowed him they took his names off of everything obviously that makes sense now they have like the money

They have

Send that money back to Jeffrey Epstein's estate. You know, so we're donated to fucking people or child people who are

Yeah, some kind of it's hard right because I do understand

They are what they're doing is it's manipulating places that are in desperate need of money. Yeah, these high

High end I've access to younger people. Yeah. Oh, yeah, and so he he they need the money and so he

Jeopardy Epstein probably the single most effective

pedophile network organizer

Maybe ever since the old days

Like he put his fingers

He put his fingers on these great industries that he could manipulate very easily

With his tremendous amount of cash that he got from who

Less Wexner that's how it all started and lots of other people none of this is possible without less Wexner

He did start it all nothing of this is possible when Epstein was down and out he was staying at Wexner's house

Yes, and also this is so that was one thing looking to that there's a whole NPR stuff on it

It's fucking wild on interlocking, but the main piece of news. Yeah, the big one. Yeah, they got old boy

Oh

Andy

I was so sad the day that our episode came out they finally arrest Andrew Montbatom Windsor formerly known as Prince

They arrested his fat

Sweaty ass. They brought him in for a couple hours of the very first time

They was this neck fatter than his head

Because that's where the food stays

He did it was like the first person

What was it the first person arrested first royal arrested? I think since 1674 as soon as I saw that he was arrested

I was like fuck this this could have been the thousand years ago since the last time a prince was arrested dude

We are now seeing the UK actually gives us a sort of shit, right? They all they released them. They got it

Well, they

Because he's probably God knows what he said now. It's all about what what can we get what is what's the evidence?

You better kill me because I know too much shit all the evidence is gone. Either way all the evidence is gone at this point

It doesn't matter what did come out was my favorite piece. What's his 72 teddy bears

So prince Andrew the not pedophile

Keeps an entire collection of little teddy bears trust as navy men

Each one is so particular that um, they are uh that he was he was so enraged

To be downgraded from his home to the farm that they put him at right yeah that because one of the big reasons as he said

I don't know if my bass can handle the move

Oh, you see the thing is you can have 72 teddy bears. You just can't care about them. This guy

Well, he's and that's has to be something because I have 10 stuffed animals full of disclosure

You like yeah, that's what you're 10 stuffed animals. You're a cute guy. Yeah, I enjoy I enjoy

I mean half of them are orcas. Yeah, what am I supposed to give them to you? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I don't buy them

I bought a couple I bought the do dog. I like the do dog

And I bought it like she's saying that it's like cocaine that it's okay as long as you don't buy it. Yes. Yeah, okay

So he was uh the Sarah talked about like he's just disgusting

He's just another example of a disgusting piece of shit and we now there's some talk

So as we know that the russians taught Epstein a skill of putting cameras in Kleenex boxes

So that was like one of the thing that he would do as a thing blows. Oh

Any

And there was some talk about whether or not so Andrew used to go through with a fine tooth comb with his help

To make sure that they were all properly organized by size and shape

And they had to be done. It would take hours for them to do it properly. Yes. I knew what else they doing. He had two people

They got into something organized the teddy bears again. I don't know fucking know who fucking knows

I wish I had someone to go through my DVDs

I'm gonna fix my tire pressure

And these guys like the it is just the he's just such a fucking pervert and

They might kick him kick him out

Well, they've got to put him in prison

There's no, they didn't even get him on the child shit. That was the part that fucked me up the most. They got him on espionage

Yeah, so they have him dead two rights

An information that he sent to Epstein about financial moves that the

The fucking royals were doing so that he could get in on it

It's the definition of insider trading and so he

Parents prince Andrew dating of course because they don't they don't got them

This it's it's fun. It's sad out there ladies

We know that it's extremely sad out there for women in order for them to this is what we were saying

This is why cash but tell our fuck that fucking moron that's the reason why he said there was nothing to go on is because there's literally no

Video of Trump's face next to a newspaper with his penis entering into a child like there is no that and even that wouldn't necessarily

It's like they that's what they're saying yeah in terms of there's no quote-unquote smoking gun

Because it's extremely difficult as we know to litigate out and do sexual assault for regular people never mind

For that because it's like because they hold this burden of proof like it's just like fucked up thing a woman has a woman gets raped

Has to go deal with an extreme physical

Search you have to go up inside you do all this you get a rape kit done the right and then they just sit hours

Yes, and then it just sits and then they just go and so

I think that it's gonna be a they're not gonna get we're not gonna get the justice we want

Jeffrey Epstein being dead is the closest thing we got

I mean someone's got to go down. I mean Adi had just quit you know lots of people fucking

Contbondi busic just said straight up there with that's woman caller

Contbondi basically just said we're not they're done

We're not well. They're done for now until the fucking shit switches over and then we arrest her ass first

Democrat with a spine and I will show you and I will I might think

I these are how many people from Trump's first term went to prison

I don't even know the number. It's gotta be 20. Yeah, it doesn't make it doesn't matter. It's gonna happen again

They're all gonna get locked up except for him

But then they get less than they get released again

I'm gonna get released and then we all get everybody goes playing like good game

And Democrats are helping to go good game get everybody. Yeah, and walk away

Peter Till just gives a bunch of money to fucking everybody. Yeah, yeah, yeah, so these people can be fucking

People suck my fucking dick. Well, you know how I agree. Yeah, but I'm trying to figure out how to be funny about it

I think Andrew's gonna get any time or anything. No, you don't think for the espionage nothing

No, I think that's what he will get

Hopefully there's an opportunity

To kill himself in jail

That is what I think I think that he's gonna get an opportunity to off himself. He is legitimately

such a

He is a massive liability. Yes, King Charles is trying to figure out what to do

But King Charles is gonna be dead soon and I think that his waste of space panty boy son is also gonna not just gonna

Shoot the bed. Well, he's gonna be king. Yeah, well, guess what good good. That's done. I thought they have power

They use a new Jackson so they're gonna say again another group of fake ass people gonna ask my fucking D

Where's out freaking? How freaking's done? Yeah

He broke

I wish I wish he didn't but he definitely we gotta find out who cares man. Honestly

All I know is I think just if I'm curious to yell it

I definitely believe that Peter Buttigieg is gonna lead the whole

Gillotine of the whole government. Don't worry

That brave man is absolutely gonna step to the entire pedophile ring

Can we just make sure we're given Bernie the same drug cocktail that are given Trump

Like can we just make sure he stay alive if you gave Bernie Sanders speedy die

He has to be at Vermont speed

Yeah, that's as fast as he can go. Jesus. All he could take. He's already had his moment

I have no idea how he's still alive. I have no idea how he's still alive. He's older than all of them. I just

We need a new batch. We do need a new batch. We could use a couple. We need all of them new step up you fucks

Who all right. I don't know. Maybe your sister

Speaking of

Jackson brosky

She will be a guest here on side stories

Here she comes

Yeah, recording

He's got her little baby smasher in there. Her little baby thrush

Catcher more than a smasher

And release

No, I ain't releasing him. I ain't releasing

If your baby lawn mower diesel

Don't use yet let it gasoline

Whoa, like then it'll set on fire. Honestly, it's a good old-fashioned propane

And then you can also grill some meats on top of the lips if you want

This is Jackie's a brosky my sister. She is talking about

Her are you do? Yes, and you might know her from LPN Romantician page 7 and who's the bitch?

Is the bitch. I'll tell you the fucking bitches. Is he you? It's me. Yeah

Yeah, cuz I voted this year

So this year

I had an old ballot

I filled it out. That is filled it out willy-nilly. That is really good. I saved my I voted stickers and wear them on random days

Just to like confuse people

What did I do? Why did I make sure of first of all? Also, did you wear this Mariah Carey shirt for me?

Oh, I love my Mariah Carey shirt

Yeah, I got it. Yeah, we we got it at the show. I like this shirt because her press

I like wearing a panceless

Like I'm Mariah Carey and it doesn't look like balls are hanging out with Joey says go. Oh my god

Get in here. All right now Mariah your balls have gotten so big

All right, let's try nipples on the balls. Let's pause here now and loud Jackie her time the reason why Jackie is here today

She's reclaiming her time. Yes. She is actually here to plug something that's not on the network

Yes, and I'm not talking about plugging up this hole on the bottom or plugging up this hole up top

Unless that's what you're into you should give slash pick a try and while that sounds like you're going to be putting

Whatever you've got inside of my holes. Well, the answer is yes in a way. Are you plugging the project?

I am slash thick check it out

It is a dating sim game where you can have sex with slasher's that are based on different IP

So I

I mean they are it's like there's leather

There's there's a mic who's based off of Michael Myers mine is there's no like Dahmer

No, no, no, no, no, only only you know IP killers. Oh, that's fine. So my yeah, so they're these big sexy guys

And now we've got slash thick cuffing season, which is the second part of this and I'm coming in my name is penny

I am a harlequin clown. I am based off of penny wise and I

Can know your deepest fees. Is there like a Jason who's like really fat and stupid and all the kids fuck with them

No, no, no, they're all just really hot. You just really want to in fact, I feel like a hockey player Jason

Not in this. I mean, he did rivalry crossover waiting to happen

No, they get this pass by all these various copyright boards. Yo, because that's the thing is that they're not it's just it's an illusion

That's why I'm penny and I look nothing like penny wise

Honestly, I'm really excited for you to enter into the world of video games

This is something you have been obsessed with for a very long time. I love dating games. I love

I've been playing dating games for so long and I have been wanting to voice a character in one of these games

And honestly, what's really cool about this company is that it's a woman

Get your balls up woman. Oh nice woman owned and they are trying to have the creators keep their IP

So a lot of the money goes directly to the creators. It is funded by the creators is for the creators

And in fact, I am now currently working on my own

cryptid fuck game so that we can start banging cryptid

Yes, so I will you know

She's down deep in the barrels of coding as just she just like pennies a chick

Yeah

Okay, I was like but Jackie's playing

Yeah, that's what I was I was weird is that why would you have an amorphous blob

Play the one the pictures up but Rob pulled up the picture up there

So I've got this like cat mask on and I'm they wanted me to be a bit of like a really insane southern bell

And so you you either get fucked by the slasher or you get killed by us

You wonder the other I work and they find it they can find it on the app Dorian get the app Dorian

And all of it is free and you can now then like as you're playing the game

You can give your money directly to the creators for the crazier scenes

Like this full titties

They just say there's more

You fuck priest

There's not titties and dicks in it, but it is very it is written

For us romant to see lovers out there and it's very fun

Honestly a lot of

female identifying and queer people that are writing

beautiful stories

Where I had no idea that I wanted to be called a piggy piggy by leather face

You know

And I'm sick of people making an insult

How do I do like why

Julie find it when you call do you say quiet piggy to Julie?

We like we love our piggy talks Julie doesn't mind it at all

I know I'm not even ending this to any other husband

You understand my love of piggy and she knows that when I say piggy it is a compliment

It's a compliment to her because pigs are smart

You want more than a fucking toddler? I'll tell you that much

Absolutely on I call my wife a woman

Yeah

How about crampers?

Crampers should have been a woman for periods

Oh why

Cramps

Oh because the cramps

Yeah, I don't know

I didn't even think that honestly I haven't had a cramp in like 10 years

So I don't I don't know what to do. Yeah, she is a kid a cramp. We started talking about the IUD

Oh wow

That's full circle

That's amazing

Yeah, I don't realize it did more than that

Yeah, it zaps it all the way

Amazing

But now we have the positive plug out of the way

Yes

And now it's time for you to enter into the world of side stories

Because I'm sick of all the positivity you've been talking about

Up until this point

I am I am over it

I do a lot of positivity as well

I know on the brighter side

Sick and the other show

So you're upset with both of us

I know I'm just saying

It's time to bring you both down a peg

All right

All right

So we got this first great story today

You talked about fallen in love

What is like getting out there dating

But no one ever really talks about the perils of marriage

I feel like that's a good thing that nobody really talks about marriage

You know, you're married now Jackie

I am married

I like the Sherals of marriage

Well, you know, it's a lot of Sherals in marriage

If Sherals not being a big old bitch

Sounds like you're stepping out with Sherals

But the one thing you know

One thing you could take to the bank

Is that you don't actually know your partner

Never the person you're sleeping next to

Is a labyrinth of mirrors

Someone that you'll never really even know

Even if they are a previous American idol contestant

Whoa

Put the dog down

No, I can't

You don't know

You're being distracted

I can't hold people around

You're being distracted

You're being distracted

You look how sad he is

Look at this, look at this

You're going to yell at him like that

He did this to me earlier

Champ gets numbers

You kidding me?

This is for the Netflix crowd

I forgot, yeah, this is this

This is for Netflix

We're fluffin' it

Yeah, what are you talking about?

This is champs good

This is our bet

This is our bet

Apologize to him

Apologize to champ

I'm sorry, champ

Thank you

Well anyway, let's talk about this guy

Do you watch American Idol?

No, I don't

You know

No, I've never watched American Idol

I watched dancing with the stars

This year for the first time though

I did too

It was surprisingly enjoyable

Delightful

What an absolute delight

Watching that robberger

When just, oh

Oh, oh

What did robberville

When kill his kill his fucking family?

I think

No, no, no

Oh, is it the number that killed the stingray?

And that's so respected it

He should have fucking

Got revenge for his life

For his father's stingrays

He should have been every day

Cookie cuttering the fucking waste

He should wake up every day

And stomp a stingray to death

No

On the side of his boat

He should have a stamp

Every time he kills a stingray

Yes, that stingray would align through it

You're right, he's a pussy

Does it rip its guts out

When it stings you did the stingray

At least

Have the guts ripped out like the bees

No, it doesn't do work like that

It just stabbed the heart with the barb

It's an assassin

Yeah

They're quiet assassins

That is in petting zoos

Yes, speaking of a quiet assassin

So this young man

A champ

This guy by the name of

He's a cute guy

Cute guy

He is by the name of Caleb Flynn

He is a pastor

And he is a former American Idol contested

Let's hear his interview

Over on American Idol

Okay

Rob

He's gonna start playing the guitar for me

That's exactly what he does

My name is Caleb Flynn

I'm from Tip City, Ohio

I audition because

I don't even get to say sorry

Music is all I know

It's what I live to do

And I love to sing

So that's why I audition

Maybe my wife kind of nudged me a little bit too

My first thought when I got my golden ticket

Honestly all I could do was

Cover my face

Because I cried a little bit

Kind of a crybaby

You get it from my mom and my dad

But it was honestly just pure joy

Excitement

I tried out for American Idol

Two or three years ago and I didn't make it

And so to get this was all the more

Sweeter and all the more

Mini-full

So it was awesome

The person that inspires me

To be an informer I guess would say

Would say the Lord

I'm a music pastor

And so that's my job every week

Is to go up there and to sing

And to connect

What I do on stage the congregation

So first and foremost

Obviously is the Lord

Thing that makes me unique

You know

I absolutely love the Lord

I love my wife

She is very very pretty

She's cool

Do you call her a piggy?

Cut

Get rid of this guy

Send him back to the Lord

That made him

No

It is a good chance that happens

I will say I do think that he did that his own wife

He did it justly

But he said he loved his wife

And you know what that means he means

He loved her a little too much

We'll see what happens

So we did one of my favorite things in true crime

Is when a man calls in

And tells the 9-1-1 operator

Exactly how he murdered the person

But in a third person way

And if somebody else had done it

So he calls and the first thing he goes is

You know I need an ambulance

So like well what's the prop me or sir

And he's like my wife is shot

Three times in the head

He's like he's so much chaos

Three separate shots in the head

I don't know how

And they're like are the kids still in the house

He's like yes

Yes the murderer might still be in there

And they're like oh my god

Do you think that the kids are okay

And he's like oh oh yeah

Do you even pretend to check out of

Did Brett?

No none of it

So he does one of those and then he looks a lot

Different post murder of his wife

Yeah, he's got what we call school bus head

Well now that 13 years of past

Since he was on American Idol

I think the issue is as that what we're seeing here is age

Yeah and that the Lord abandoned him finally

What I do like is that as he got older

His hair concentrated on a more pinpoint part of his skull

Yeah he looks like a conehead

He looks like he's becoming a conehead

He's mid transformation

Maybe that's why he killed her

He never got out of tip city

Never left tip city

Stay in there

Get out

Stay in there

Couldn't he never gave the whole thing

No slightly in there

Then right back out

Jackie do you remember

Do you ever watch worse cooks

Oh yeah

Food Network

Yeah

Yeah

Most of all

The NBarell story

Is

Daryding

Absolutely

I don't know what you're talking about

Oh NBarell

Somebody I loved on Food Network

Has now

Died by suicide

And it's the most hardcore

Non-lesbian lesbian

You've ever seen in your life

Very sad

She had a hair

She had a hair like a

Fucking

Napalm tsunami

And she was

Ake

She was quite a

Quite a leader

On the Food Network show

Worst Cook

You liked her breasts

Didn't you

No she's gross

Okay

But I mean

That was a stressful way

I mean

That was a respectful way

She's not

No

She's not like

She's not like that

I mean

I'm sorry

I'm sorry

I'm sorry

I'm sorry everybody

That was my best

Everybody's upset

It's fine

I'm threats

I'm threats

All right

And I need you to understand that

That's what makes you such a great host

Yes

I have a chance to talk

And we should be thanked for allowing him to run this network

So what are

I'm

My disability makes me

Special and fun

I'm like the BBC

We have nothing

Yes

We do

We do

Two of them

Oh god

So

In Lord

But in Burrell

So she was found

In a cascade of pills

Dead in her shower

And they just now

Released that there was a suicide note

She had kept a suicide journal

And then do you remember

Also for Worst

Worst Cook

Yes

Where she had kept a separate document

Where she was writing all of her sad

Boxes

Extremely sad

It really fucked up

It's very sad

But and also on Worst Cook

It's totally against journaling

Right

Journal journaling is the problem

I don't need

I know how many people we know

And have gotten

Someone read their journal

And they had to break up with a significant other

Well it's because you

You should be reading their journal

I know

But the person

It's always the person

That's why the journal is wrong

And it has to rest

This is the problem though

Is that I remember

I'll never forget

When mom came into my room after

Having read my journal

And she wrote

If you don't want someone to know something

Never write it down

She's like

That's not

What is this like

Coastal Nostra

Right

I just know

I was like

It's just my

I love that rob

Immediately brought up

The diary

And Frank

I'm sorry

It's a diary

It's a diary

She did it

Let's get back to the story

It's Kenny

So I was

Want to talk about

What

It's also for Worst Cooks

That lady that killed her child

That one

Worst Cooks in season two

She killed her child

She killed her child

Food poisoning

I know

My question is Jackie

What is it with

Reality television show people

Enter crime

Like they're not real celebrities

They're just fucking shoved into

Shoved into its celebrity

I asked

They don't have to earn it

I asked the woman

Think about

Honestly

Think about the stunt casting

Of the show Chicago

Right

It's being infamous

It's the idea that

Roxy Heart is always

Oftentimes brought in

To be played by a celebrity

Why are you making this

Jump into Chicago land

Why did we do

On page seven we've been talking about

Whitney from

Secret lives of Mormon wives

Is playing Roxy Heart

But she's not the first time

A Roxy Heart is like

Pam Anderson has played her like

Yeah, they just don't cast it

But it's because the reason why

They stunt cast that specific

It's because of

The especially with like

Reality television stuff like that

It's the idea of being infamous

Why was Renee Zellwa

Garina in the Oscar-wimneying film

Because she won Oscars to do it

After the fact

Yeah, that was

But she knew what she was going to go catch

She should've been

We'll release a Marie Presley

She can't pick her anymore

Wait, she's dead

Well, yeah, back in the day

She was too old then by then to play her

What is she going to play up against

Catherine Zeta Jones

Catherine Zeta Jones was like

65 years old in that film

No, she's not

She's not even 69 years old

No, she's not even 69 years old

I'm trapped

Oh, sorry

I'm trapped

I think it is the idea

I'm sorry, Henry

I apologize

Becoming famous no matter what

I think there is that like

Part of like even in like

You look at a Whitney

From secret lives of Roman wives

That she was straight up like

Oh, you want me to be the villain

In this show

So that I can get on Broadway

She's openly said

I will like keep giving me the villain

And it's I'll keep being this bitch

If it means I'm going to have a career

After this

And so that's kind of how they spun it

And so why should we kill these people

Do they sing 25 or 6 to 4

Chicago

Yeah, they threw the big band version of Chicago

That's through the you know

The half time we both

We both the gun we both we both the gun

We both more saxophone

Yes

All right, so that's I guess you could say that

Catherine Zeta Jones was approximately 31 to 33 years old

During the production of Chicago

Approximately approximately

Approximately

In her age 50s

If you have to put her ages approximately

During a time period

There is some doubt

She's got secret

Of course

And don't bring this up in front of Mariah Carey

Mariah Carey is pretended to not have a birthday

For many many years

Mariah Carey was forged

Yeah

She was not born

Mariah Carey was forged

By natural water

Oh yeah

Yeah, that was like the now the movement of water

That is so yeah

Oh yeah

Yes

So what's your advice for this guy?

Oh, well

Sounds like you're each aware of his problem

The main the main problem was that he put the three bullets in her head

And didn't save any for the kids

Because now he's got to go be a single father

Slashvik

You know

The game is coming out

You got to go to Dorian

That's big

Dorian man

Also if you're listening to this on Wednesday

And if you happen to be in LA

Check out the ripped bodice

Because your wife and I

Are going to be doing a monsters against ice show

It's pro monster fucking

As long as those monsters

Are not a member of ice

Oh

How many of you are 100% of the donations go

Towards churla as well

What about the Epstein list

What about

I think that your wife is doing enough

Work on Epstein list

In some of her other things

I sometimes wonder if

If we're in the Epstein list

But like walking around inside of it

Like it's the back rooms

That's how to Natalie and I are right now

Yes

That we just sort of kiss

Finding the monster

We talk about what we just read in a separate room

You know, some different variants

So Natalie goes from the Epstein list

To like straight up fucking monsters

Yes

And then you expect to have normal conversations with her

We don't

I know

No, no, no, no, no

I don't expect to have what

What

It's been very crazy

Because I recently

I was watching the process

Of my husband's mother die

And during all of this

I've been listening to these

From top to bottom

Super nuts

Oh yeah

Watch it

It's starting at the hair

But it's I'm a god to the toes

I was like she's dust

But I've been listening to these

Just monster

And like these

This like people are getting railed

By 12 foot bass lists

And then

I'm holding my husband

As he's crying

And I'm just listening to this

And you know

The dichotomy of life

Isn't it beautiful

It really is

And speaking of the dichotomy of life

There's so many ways for us to try to get back to nature

Yes

You know, we love monster

Yes, and we've been talking about monster

Yeah, I do

It's really hard

Because I feel like

We've been separated from nature

By technology

You're right

We've been separated

From our natural instincts

Yeah

And I think that's why it's really good to have you here

To talk about the Kentucky man that was found covered in fur

After he was allegedly

Caught having sex with a deer's corpse

Now what when you say covered in fur

Are we talking he glued it to himself

I don't think it was that organized

Okay

I think he's skinned a deer

Oh

Put on its fur

And then

Fucked it's skinless corpse

Eleanor's born

The same one

Didn't go out to find another deer

You know, it's surprisingly

Not that much information in this article

And for that, I want to say

Shame on you, local twelfth

Shame on you, W-C

I have so many questions

We already have a cover up happening

From the merry-tipety top

Of the government all the way on down

And you don't want us to know

Whether or not he got the hair

Separate from the deer's corpse

He was fucking

Yes, he was covered in fur

For all we know it's dog fur

To be honest, he's fucking an

Intact dead deer

But I don't think that's what it was

He also

Could just be

Polish Italian

Oh

I mean

If you saw me fucking a dead deer

And I also happen to be covered in dirt

Let's just pause at this

Right

Because right now it seems to be the big issue

Is as that someone saw him

Covered in fur

That was even to be the big issue

Right

And they thought

They saw him fucking a corpse

On the side of the other road

They called the cops

They got him

At first it was this whole big idea

That he was covered in fur

But now I'm certain to think

If I was dirty

Right

In a ditch

I'm in a retention pond

I'm fucking a deer corpse

Right

I'm covered in brown hair

Okay

If I'm already covered in brown

Brown brown hair

If I get slathered with dirt

It's very possible

You would think I'm covered in fur

Yeah

I'm fucking the thing

Right

So the thing is very possible

Looking at the man himself

I think that Alan Osborne

Might have touched back hair

So they're saying you're triggered by this

Feel that

No

He could have not been covered in hair

He could have not been covered in fur

I'm commiserating

And to be a Sherlock Holmes

Okay

That's what you're doing

I'm unpacking

You know

Do you think that the

That the sheriff's

The people of this fine county

Do you think that they think it's better

If he was pretending to be a deer

Fucking the other deer

That like they're like

We got to let everybody

Know he's covered in fur

Because like

At least he thought he was a deer

Fucking another deer

That's very optimistic of you

And I like that way of look

That way of thinking

Thank you

Yeah, I actually think

That they like the idea that he's covered in fur

Because we're

And this might be a big jump

Literally

But they're like

Farries

That's right

That's them's fur

That's them's fur

This fur

They're pretty scary

They're scary

And they're head

They're meaty like

Oh my god

San Francisco

San Francisco

San Francisco is here

Run and are edible roadcale

They're coming down here

No

That roadcale was for it

That was for it

And for stew

All right

But that might

He might

He might

The dirty

Yeah

He might

He might

He might

He don't

He don't

Yes

And it's disgusting

When it's

He put his combala hair is juicing it

It's his combala hair is juicing

It's his combala hair is juicing

He does look ashamed

I will say that

Yes

Because he look ashamed

He got caught

His heads

His eyes are down

I think

He's talking straight into the camera

Yeah

Well

That'd be

Awesome

If he was looking in the camera

$10,000 what smile

Like full

Like if he had full

Like veer

Veer

Yes

Hi

Actually, this is a perfect time to bring this up

This is a part of our monster fucker show

Because there is a dog shifter

In the world of Sookie Stackhouse

Who's like

He is a hot guy

Regularly

He's just like the owner of this bar

But then she

Started seeing this coli

At night

And then she started noticing

All these pregnant dogs around town

A lot of these are wearlassies

So he's a

Yes, he's a wearlassies

It's all the animal fucking stuff

But then that's my question for you though

Is he a

Does he have a human brain

When he's a dog

Like if he's in his dog form

Does he still have a human brain

And so it's the human brain

Choosing to fuck other dogs

Or is it a dog's brain

So he has no control over it

It's a dog's brain

There's no way another man with a brain

A normal brain is trying to fuck dogs

Unless he's thinking that the dogs are attractive

When he's a man

How does he shift back into being a human

If he has a dog's brain

Because it's his job

The whole thing switches back

It's a wearlassie

How do you understand it better

Lassie at night man during the day

He understands nothing

But that's not even the case

He can chew his shifts at will

I think here's a

I know you're right

Thank you

I'm sorry

I think he's a fucking pervert

You should be arrested

Well, this is what I was saying

That there are times that you are like

You're supposed to be like attracted to this character

And the book and I'm like

I can't be because in my head

He's a dog that fucks other dogs

This is the thing

Again

I could get this off the screen

Get that dog inside her

Get off the screen

It is just a dog

And this is my problem

Yes

Is it anything involving dog penises

Makes me want to put a gun in my fucking mouth

And the idea of this

Oh man

My new boy

His little penis came out for the first time

Oh my god

We saw it

We saw it

It's such a good day

Chop

What was he looking at

I really

A july laugh

Oh my god

Chop it

Chop it

Chop it

We're good

We're cutting this nuts off

But I was happy

And I think it's showing

That he's starting to get comfortable

It's nice

It's too comfortable

Yeah

All right, let's get out of it

Well, do you think

I don't find the monsters having sex

Like like

I'm in monsters

That's why I just pause at the question

Like that's not what I'm into

Yeah

The cops said that he was actually kind of horny

And then he got mad

He's like I'm

Antlery

I'm sorry

Yeah

Yeah

And he's brilliant

And he's brilliant

From Northland

Jackie sear on a short amount of time

And we I wanted to do something before

She's a lot to leave

Okay

So on her

Show page seven

She works with MJ Nuffal obviously for many years

She's a little

Thing that she likes to do on her show is segment

She's like to do snack corner

I like it because you keep called it snack attack

You call it snack corner

You've called it almost everything except its name

Which is literally Jackie's

Snackies

It rhymes with my name

But I like that

You hate it

I know

And Henry kept saying

I'm gonna snack attack you on Tuesday

I'm a snack attack you on Tuesday

And I was like I don't know what that means

I'm trying to embrace you

I appreciate this

And so what I saw this never happened

No, no, we don't touch each other

Like when they're dead

No hugs

We totally touch each other

Yeah

And we're not a touchy family

Not a touchy family

And so time to touch

So I wanted to do

I want to just snack attack you

Okay

All right

So Jackie's snack attack

Everybody knows the segment

And so no it's Jackie's snackies

So Jackie finds obscure snacks

And she springs them on her people

Right the gas on the show

But most of the time they're pleasant

And you like them

You like them

Yes

This one I try to be nice

Yes

Have you had any bad ones?

Sure

Of course we have

What's the worst snack you've had?

Well, uh oh

We had that we got the Thanksgiving Oreos

And specifically they had a roasted turkey Oreo

That was it

It smelled so much like roasted turkey

And an Oreo mixed together

But the turkey was so turkey

That it true

Like I did throw up

Yeah, Jack

And that was apparently threw up as well

Yes

I made sure there was no turkey in it

For there wasn't any actual turkey

No, there's no real food in this thing

I saw this

And I knew

You had to try this

And I knew the only way it was going to happen

Is if we did it on camera or on mic

I'm so scared

I saw this, I have to eat it too

No

Oh, I saw this, I have to do it

This, we're not sponsored by them

We have no idea if they know

And I think that these are fine

So every year apparently

Progress those soups

Puts out

A series of hard candies

That they run out immediately

And I had no idea that they did this

We do good put

We are still doing good put

With good put season two

Coming out

We're coming at you

But by the way

I find the the term hard candy offensive

Thank you

I'm sorry I have Tourette's

And so

Progressive

I said I'm sorry

I love I'm sorry I have Tourette's

And so

This one is when you

It's the new things for this week

For this week I can do it

Quite big

And so this one I have here

This is a

They are Progressive Soup Drops

The tagline is soup you can suck on

Ooh

Now

Oh wow

Oh wow

They are limited edition

Wow

They sell on immediately

I don't buy an eBay

I have heard about these

I've never been able to get them before

You got them on eBay

I want them on eBay for you

Wow

They just be free in nursing homes

They come in three flavors

I get wars in this

Oh my god

It's their food cans

Yep

So this one soup drops

This one is

So they have a big one

Italian wedding

They give you a big one of chicken noodles

I love this

So this is Italian wedding

So what they do here is

They give you a can of soup

Right so this is a can of chicken noodles

So you can compare

What do you know where it's what it is

What it is

Yeah no no that's some progress

Is that soup in there

You know these are soup drops

No I guess is it chunky

Like is there a

Melty center

Now it says here

Natural flavors

Natural flavors

Mmm

Oh okay

It's natural

Wait but there's different kinds inside the soup

It is beef pot roast

Cool

Chicken noodle

Ooh

And tomato basil

Which one would you like to try

Tomato basil is probably the only one

That's actually kind of maybe good

I feel like if I'm going to do this

I should eat the beef pot

First of all let's you know

Let's hear it pop

Yeah we know they're fresh

Oh wow

Oh yeah

Tennis balls

Okay here we go

I would think we could figure out

Which one is which by color

I would

Now I don't know

It has to be beef

There are all levels

The darkest

It has to be beef

Hmm

Yeah they'll know they definitely look like

There's little chunky chunky

Which one do you want to do Jackie

Do you want a red or you want a brown

I guess I want a

I feel like if I'm going to do this

I should do a beef pot roast

But Henry does that mean you're going to do chicken noodle

I'm going to take whatever this red is

Red is obviously tomato basil

Well then I'll do

But one of it's like a brown

I'll do tomato basil

I'll do tomato basil

Because I feel like that's like a bloody Mary

Here we go

This should this might be beef

Yeah this is with a shot of vodka

That's it

Yeah

I want to see what you think

Should we do it all at the same time

Or should we take turns

Let's do it at the same time

Okay, all right

Watch out, champ

Oh no, there's an opportunity

I don't want this

He probably would love it

One, three, two, one

Oh god

My taste looks spaghetti-os

Yeah

I kind of like mine

Honestly

Yeah, there's tomato basil

I like it

Mine's tomato basil

How'd you get tomato basil

You don't like the beef

You don't like the beef

Where's the beef, champ?

Wait, this one's not good

Try this one's not good

Try one or the other one

Try this one's not good

That one, you want some of my coffee

Try it that one

Watch it that one's not good

That one's not good

I like it

There's a Mario up

I like the tomato basil

It tastes spaghetti-os

Yeah

I love spaghetti-os

Everyday I used to get home from school

And I'd put on the Heidi cartoon

And I'd eat like two cans

Two cans

I was a big boy

I just took it off to Heidi

You're sweet

Actually, the tomato basil

There's actually much sweeter than I expected it to be

The tomato basil one is sweet

The other one

Does taste like roasted beef

In a hardened form

The tomato basil one I would actually suggest to people

This is where

Yeah, honestly, I don't even want it

I'm just throwing it out

Just because I don't

Barf bucket

We have barf buckets

Yeah, we brought

No, the tomato basil actually really is still

No, it's okay

More delicious than I expected

It's probably just like a bouillon cube

It's like sucking on a bouillon cube

I mean, you're talking my language

Some people eat bouillon cubes

You know, some people really need that dose of sodium

And I think I'll bless it

You know, come explain it

You can beef them

Come on, isn't it my tongue burn

It is a

I feel like the flavors not going to go away anytime soon

It's still in my mouth

Yeah, yeah, it's really eye

Just cut yours out

Yeah, just because I'm in the microphone

It is I know we'll say sorry for everybody

That hates the mouth sounds out there

I couldn't give a fucking shit

The mouth sound

If you have me so fun that hates it

Two people love it

Now, you know what it is

If you can't

I understand the meast of phoning people

I get it every single time we always get emails about it

But guess what man

If you can't handle little tiny sounds

How the fuck are you going to deal with 2026

Whoa

It's a shit together

This is a real

Little tiny sound

A lot of Tourette's going on today

Yeah

Hello

Champ my fuckers

Yep

Well, Jackie, why don't you give that plug one last time

So people know where they can find you

Please everybody

Download the app

Dorian and start playing

No champ, you can't eat this cough drop

It's start playing Slashfic

Cuffing season

You know you want to either bang me as a clown

Or get killed by me as a clown

Those are your options

But there are many ways in which

I can kill you

So go check them all out

At Slashfic

Cuffing season

Do you kiss or is it straight

You know like a brothel rules

No, it's

Let's just say it's not your normal kind of kiss it

Wow

Let's just say

I mean she's still at a nightmare clown

So it's not going to be

Roses over here

But you know

I still think we should have like a really fat

Dumpy kid named Jason

Who everyone like beats up on

Put that in your mood

I love it

If this is a

You were trying to get me to put the squunk

Into my cryptid fuck game as well

Funny was that I always want the sad fat one in there

I think that's fun

The squunker should be great

Because then somebody like

No, but he wants to touch him

But he wants

No, but he wants to

And it just farts out

But you can rail the hell out of a squam

Oh yeah

And I want to see

And I'll sit here and wait till you're done

Counting on it, pounding on it

Yeah, just letting

No, I don't want to just let it happen to him though

Can you imagine what kind of fat piece of shit

You'd have to be that I have cast

But like

Can you imagine what kind of fat piece of shit

You'd have to be to use progressive soup

Suckers as cough drops

Oh my god

Or if to give it to someone

And make them actually feel better

I'm like come on just suck on a little bit of my soul

I mean honestly the chicken soup one

I can see the logic

Yeah, I can see the logic

On that being what you should do

But obviously

I don't want to see it in my mouth

Shouldn't happen

I'll say though

Way less bad than I thought there were going to be

They really were not

I was nervous when you said

You were going to snack attack me

I was like god help us after good put

It really could be absolutely anything

What is good coming back?

It's my favorite show on the network

We're about we are working on the script for it

Okay, we're doing a whole thing for this

All right, no, okay, good

It's going to be great though

And you're it's going to be worth the wait

Can I come back as the bird again?

Yeah

That means we're going to have to go back to the beach

And the Zorowski's on the beach

It's never a good time

Hey, I got the same gucks

The cup size is the net for the jello

So

Well, I don't always want to find me

A little old server boy to play around with them

All right, Jackie

Thank you for joining us this Saturday

Thank you guys

I'm going to talk about an 11-year-old boy

He'll kill this dad

Because he took his intent to switch away

Have fun

Hey man

Dad deserved it

Bye from your play

Thank you Jackie

I love you

I'm going to play your sexy video game

You're not going to

But supported by it

I'll buy it

Just buy it, I'll buy it

You don't have to play it

Yeah

You know, because now four years off for me

See, I'm mad at Jackie Sims

I didn't bring this up on the show

Because the last time Jackie did Sims

She like created all of us in the world

And then the fucking Sims killed Tutsi

Yes, well, I know is that Natalie and I broke up

And I ended up living outside

You really?

Yeah

Fucking killed Tutsi

And also

You got it wrong

Rambo died

Tutsi's fine

Tutsi's never going to die

Tutsi learned how to fly

Yeah, Tutsi hovered

Yeah

I watched you the other day hover

She's my baby

I love her

She's my little girl

I'm glad that I don't have an 11 year old boy

Dude, I am more thankful that we don't have kids

Every single time I read another story

About children shooting their fucking parents

Yeah

So this happened

This kid's got to be stopped

It's allegedly

But we're pretty sure it happened

An 11 year old boy

Had his Nintendo switch

Taken away from his father

He was upset

He stole the keys to the lock box

Looking for the switch

Looking for the switch

And then he didn't find the switch

He found a gun

He turned

And he shot his father

Bucca

What? Cause he wanted to switch

And then he went and hid in the closet

Dude

He screaming daddy's daddy killed daddy

Dude

This kid

Hardcore

He called the fucking 9-1-1 on himself

We understand that screen time

Could be a problem for the children

Let him watch Netflix

This is the thing guys

Just give it to him

Honestly at this

2026 man

Just give it to him

Just fucking give it to him

Just give it to him

Screen time

Yeah they need it

They need it

That kid fucking

Over my fucking dead body

Yes

You can play a switch

I'll play it with you

Honestly I'm kind of mad at the 11 year old

If he really wanted to teach his father a lesson

You just hold the gun at him

Yeah

You know like

And he

Be like

Fucking switch your decision

Rob

Hey daddy

Hey daddy looks like I'm your daddy now

I'm your fucking daddy now

Right

Oh yeah

But he doesn't know about leverage

Yeah

So that's a problem with 11 year olds in her arms

They understand they can be used for negotiating tools

Instead of just straight murder dude

Because when you murder daddy

He gets that you're not going to get

When they're treating you like an adult and jail

Which they are

Well he's gone to the juvenile court

I think that I thought that he said they're treating him like an adult

This the

This is the the preteens lawyer told local outlets

Said no comment on the case

But his goal is to get his client into juvenile court

He's literally not even a preteens

He's 11

Yeah he's a lot of his birthday

Oh well you can't take away

You just can't even do this game

The switch

This is birthday

Yeah

Fucking I mean if it's birthday

You a little play with the gun

All I know is his that

It's certainly the switch didn't teach him

The lesson was to shoot what you don't like

Yeah

I know that

Yeah

So

There's no way he was in like

I'm gonna do like you do and call it duty

I'm gonna fucking

Blow my father's brains out

Oh my god

So my little nephew

He's like 10

11 something like that

He's this kid's age

How does he even shoot a gun at 11

He's playing call a duty

At my my little nephew

He's playing call a duty

And I'm like you're playing call a duty

And he's like yeah I play call a duty

I'm having a good time

I like call a duty

I mean it's a lot of fun

I was like well what'd you do

He's like earlier today

I was playing against a Nazi

And I ran out of bullets

So I beat him the death of my helmet

That's a real man

You're talking to that

I just told the fucking man

I'm not seeing him in the real life

Beat him the death of your bicycle helmet

That's it you learn

Crazy

He said he was looking for the switch

Inside the safe and found the gun instead

Yeah

Yeah I should have done that

Yeah that's why he got to do the combo lock safe

That's why it's more like kid can't figure that out

He can't be in the same place

Yeah

He really should never put the switch where the gun is

No never

Honestly because you never

I never want one or the other

I always very much want my gun

Also don't have the kid

Yeah the kid is a problem here

Do you raise them run

Give them the screen time

Talk about ultimately being immediately punished

for racing your child and correctly

Right

Isn't that sad

Yeah obviously the kids go to jail

He's 11

Love in your old to just feel like