Sleepy Weed And Smiley | All Star Western Theatre (06-07-47)

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Welcome to the old-time radio westerns.

I'm your host, Andrew Rines.

And let's get into this episode.

This episode is going to be also our western theater.

The original air day is June 7th, 1947.

And the title is Sleepy, Weed, and Smiley.

With Smiley Burnett in one of the lead roles.

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The Bakers of Weber's Bread.

Is that your all-star western theater?

From Hollywood.

Come to our all-star western theater, starring Amika's Great Western Singers,

Boydwelling and the Riders of the Purple Page.

And with them is their special guest.

Is the West's own clown of song and story, Smiley Burnett.

And now here are the Riders of the Purple Page.

And now here are the Riders of the Purple Page.

Thank you, folks.

Last night, the boys and I were talking about songs.

And somebody brought up an idea that makes rather a pretty picture.

You know, all Mark Twain visited the early West,

and we got to imagine him out around the Virginia City,

our Gold Hill mining camp.

It would be at night, and Mark was fast to listen to a voice coming from the

darkness.

Our lonely miners singing half for his own pleasure,

and half for an unspoken player that his words were

reaching the heart of a loved one for a wait.

And we thought if such a thing could have happened,

the song might very well be one that could save it even now.

My love.

Oh, if you tell me my love,

let you love me.

Oh, I love you, Molly Burnett.

You are all the world.

And you lead up and you love me.

Oh, do you let all hands in my heart?

If my heart sweet, Molly Burnett.

Hey, that you will give me my love.

Lonely past, sweet and still rare.

Lonely past, darling tell me this.

You love me, Molly Burnett.

Let your love be a key.

Much credit for taming the web

belongs to a fearless group of men known as the Texas Rangers.

A ranger was chosen for his raw courage,

a better day to draw and to fast.

And his sincere desire to uphold law and order.

And he had to be pretty versatile too.

Many strange situations were encountered in fulfilling the order.

Sometimes a ranger would find it necessary to lend aid to a sick rancher,

or set some unfortunate cow-pokes broken legs,

or help round up a stampeding herd.

In other words, a Texas ranger had to be an all-purpose pan.

Ready for anything.

And today, Webber's Bread is the all-purpose bread,

playing an important and enjoyable part on every menu.

For breakfast, lunch, or dinner, and in-between snacks,

good Webber's Bread really hits the spot.

Serve Webber's Bread often.

You can be sure every member of the family will like it.

Look for it in the blue gingham wrapper.

Every man, I guess, has his own ideas on what makes a woman attractive.

But there was one gal who came into town and stirred up considerable excitement

among all the men, the riders of the purple sage included.

They'll tell you about her now with red-tilted stockings and green perfume.

Here's a story of a roaring wild sound.

And a gal who really knew her way around.

They still talk of that event all the way.

He came and went.

He took that town and turned it upside down.

With a red-tilted stockings and a green perfume.

She blew into this man's sound.

Let her feel her boo.

Never was any trouble.

But she thought it'd come soon.

With a red-tilted stockings and a green perfume.

All the town was ruined and the money was gone.

And the boys were throwing it around.

The red-tilted stockings and a green perfume.

He's singing a lot of songs in a gandon hole.

When a long came a stranger, he was handsome and tall.

He won every left's dollar, that we had in the room.

And the red-tilted stockings and a green perfume.

The red-tilted stockings and a green perfume.

The red-tilted stockings and a green perfume.

All the time was good, and the body was swollen, and the boys were throwing it around.

All the rest of the talking and the green perfume.

If we seem to be strutting us up a little more than usual today, it's because we're a little more proud than usual.

You see the writers of the purple sage have as a guest.

One of the finest and best love comedians in the motion picture world.

A comedian who's tickled the funny bone of Western fans throughout the world.

I guess you know who I'm talking about.

Mr. Smiley Burnett.

Well, how do you do to everybody?

And to celebrate the occasion Smiley and the writers of the purple sage are going to tell you a very special story.

It's called Sleepy Weed and Smiley.

The writers of the purple sage like all carefree vagabonds are an exclusive group.

They consider as members only those believing in the open range in the blue sky.

Only those who love high adventure and good fun.

No, it isn't everyone who has the qualifications that will enable him to join this exclusive group.

Although there are a great many who try to get in.

Wait a minute, boys.

Hold your horses.

Some wrong boy?

Yeah.

We've got one more writer with us now than we had when we started.

We got what?

You mean somebody's snake dance?

Don't away?

That's exactly what I mean.

Somebody has snake dance.

Don't away and is writing right along with us.

And not even ask about your leave.

None of us.

And if you don't speak up, I'm coming over after him.

Well, how do you do to everybody?

Watch Smiley Burnett.

You ought to be a snake.

Don't away.

Stealing a ride.

Let me handle this, boys.

Smiley?

What are you doing here?

Huh?

Oh, I was going that way.

When I see you, fellas.

So what?

You were what?

I was going that way there.

Well, he's acting like he ain't got good sense for.

What does he mean?

Go on that way.

Something out of a foreign language, I guess.

Well, ain't nothing.

It's the way all us Western fellas always talk.

I know we do because I've here to say such things in the moon pictures.

Smiley.

We don't mind if you ride with us.

But just remember, no funny business this time.

I got you, partner.

I got you.

I got you, partner.

Got you.

Which way was you going?

Well, not that way, anyhow.

We're heading for the Sweet Bar Age Ranch.

The bed down for the night.

And in the morning, we're riding for the flat.

There's a little business we want to take care of up there.

Well, then look warm, Lily.

She cooked me up some flapjacks and some bacon with our heads.

Until I couldn't reach the table.

Oh, and some coffee, too.

Look, warm, Lily made five or six pots of coffee.

Four.

Four.

And when you get me leaving, you hit that harmony over the head with a stick or something.

Oh, is anybody going to get me sleep around here?

Smiley, we're all beddied down for the night.

How about setting off the gal?

Oh, I'll be glad to.

I know how that is to have somebody talk, talk, talk, talk on your tarts.

Talk, Hannah, the circle over our works once was a gathering.

And he talked the door right off the barn one night.

His name was Lion Lion.

And he could tell more fives than any old boy himself.

Oh, he started all over again.

But I haven't actually seen him talk the door right off the barn once.

And if you're the least way he's interested,

I can tell you no exactly how he done it.

Never mind, boy.

The gab can't last much longer.

Oh, Lion Lion was inside the barn.

See, we're pulsating feet and seven toes salmon me.

Was trying to catch a little nap.

Oh, Johnny, yeah.

I put a good health in a sleepy weed and smiley coffee.

Oh, when he was having a child tonight.

I knew he'd talk all night if I didn't sort.

No, excuse me, boy.

You interrupted.

What a sleepy weed.

Who thought sleepy weed and who's coffee?

Well, I put it in yours, Smiley.

We've had experience with you before.

Oh, fine.

No, you didn't do that now.

Well, I had to do something.

None of us would have gotten anywhere.

But sleepy weed gives me bad dreams.

Terrible dreams.

Well, I keep everybody awake for miles around

when anybody puts sleepy weed in my coffee.

This is it, squinty.

Somebody better down over there, Clyde.

Boy, you're willing in this outfit out of bed?

I don't like that at all.

Me either.

But there's nothing much we can do about it.

We got to work here.

This is the oil well old Vaskam's been syncing.

400 yards, two south of the ranch house.

Like Polly Colors.

That boy willing is a mean ombre.

Yeah, I heard he is.

Everybody finds a fellow doing something illegally,

but slide into that fellow's business.

Price to get some of it from south?

No, no.

Worth takes our state's share.

Murderers, losses, horses.

Why everybody?

Well, sounds mean all right.

Lucky we aren't doing nothing

but trying to get this ranch away from the old man and his daughter.

I always said we wasn't even to that

unless this turns out to be helium coming to the oil well

instead of ordinary gas.

And we can't tell the storms

that we fill up the balloons on that pesto.

Hey, before you're willing in this outfit,

it'll be gone by that time.

Well, Charlie, if you'll give us a big enough balloon to fill.

No, most is that one.

And help me get the nozzle over the pipe.

You'll hope, boy, willing, don't catch it at this.

How's that look?

A balloon fastened tight enough?

Yeah, I guess so.

All right, boy, willing as I mean?

Oh, brilliant.

Well, stand back now while I turn the spigot.

Where's Ryan?

Yeah, here it is.

Fill up the balloon.

Get outta here.

Yeah, she's turned.

Yeah, she's turned.

Yeah, she's turned from any of us.

We'll fill the balloon up good and tight

and take her back to Charlie.

And let's try to decide whether it's real helium or not.

Miley.

Miley.

Gringo.

Where'd it be quiet?

Oh, this is awful, boy.

How can anybody sleep?

Oh, it's my fault, I guess.

He said he'd get that dream whenever anybody put sleepy-weaving his coffee.

I sure hope the sleepy-weed wears off quicker.

We're sure going to put us in a light.

Let it turn off now, Clyde.

Yeah, it got about as much as the blue will hold.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He gets off.

The balloon's almost too full.

I think I would let some out.

No, no, we can hold her.

Clyde, you would need an all-the-work neck with this thing.

Charlie, didn't do any.

Yeah, I had the same thing in mind, Scuddy.

Why should a fellow who doesn't work will get any of the gravy?

Uh, you satisfied this is really helium.

Yep, yep.

And he shouldn't get any of the profits.

No, sir, not a penny.

Why don't we wait until morning and take over this ranch for ourselves?

What about those colors there?

Boy-willing.

That boy-willing's a mean all-brain.

Uh, uh, Squidding.

Yeah, you see a big foot sticking out from under the blanket.

Yep.

You feel how hard this balloon is, doesn't it?

Yep.

Well, why don't we let it tug at that foot?

Mmm.

It's how it tug so hard to carry a boy-willing right on up.

You know, Clyde?

I like you.

You got green.

Hey, come on.

Boy-willing will be up over the North Pole before the gas is out of this balloon.

Where's a piece of rope so we can stop higher?

The biggest foot I've ever seen in my life.

That's two.

Looks like a fat ironing board.

Hey, that's my foot.

Better hurry it up, Clyde.

Hey, that's my foot, not boy.

Hello, it's pulling somebody off.

I'm holding down as hard as I can.

That's my leg trapped around this pole or two.

A few armors are making a terrible mistake.

fellow would speak like this.

I want to be able to walk right on the water.

Stop!

I tell you.

Certainly, we wouldn't have no trouble crossing quicks.

All right.

All right, next time.

Now, when I count three, let loose the balloon.

Yeah.

One, two, three.

Let loose.

No!

Nothing happened.

Huh?

Well, I just joked off this minute.

Now, you wake me up here.

What?

Well, I heard it sound like somebody was being dragged across the ground.

Hey.

Smiley's gone.

Go away.

Well, that must have been the noise I heard.

Whoa.

Cougar's dragging him off, maybe, huh?

Smiley.

Smiley.

Where are you?

Oh.

Listen.

Oh.

Where are you, Smiley?

Look, there's a way.

Oh, why do things like this always have to happen at night?

Can't see a thing.

Smiley.

You're looking that way, but I'm that way.

But where?

In the tree.

Why are we up here in the top of the tree?

Oh.

Are you into anything?

What are you doing up in the tree at this hour?

Well, come up here and give me quiz.

Keep quiet out.

Yeah.

Why do you say it, Smiley?

I'm hanging on to the top of a tree, but you've got to hurry.

If a gust of wind happens to blow in a cave, it's clear up to the clouds.

Clouds?

Oh, that mustn't sleepy-weed you put in.

Call for it.

It must loco-weed.

Look.

There he is.

See, against the sky.

A balloon has attached to him.

Yeah, Smiley.

What are you doing up there?

Attached to a balloon.

Hold on, Smiley.

I'll climb up and cut the rope loose.

Well, hurry, boy.

We've got to get those fellas who are trying to take cool man back and scratch away from

him.

Look at the wind, hippie.

There he goes.

The wind, Torin, loose.

He's gone out.

Oh!

What am I going to do?

I'm falling in space.

Hey, fly, I'll shoot him down, huh?

Oh!

I'm hungry.

I need a sleigh.

I'm hungry.

I'm hungry.

I need a sleigh.

I need a sleigh.

I need a sleigh.

I need a sleigh.

I need a sleigh.

I need a sleigh.

I'm hungry.

I need a sleigh.

I'm

hungry.

I need a sleigh.

There.

I need a sleigh.

I need a sleigh.

I need a sleigh.

Oh!

The balloon might blow up and Smiley don't bounce.

You can't give me down, either.

Maybe if you save these rancs, they give you some grub.

Could you shoot me up sounds, anything?

Some biscuits in the shotgun, far out of hungry.

Molly.

Molly's right, Al.

We can't get him down, and the old man is liable to sell the ranch.

Oh, hey.

Get a pie, if you can.

That's what I crave the most.

I want to sit up here on a cloud-need pie.

Come on, Al.

Quick, yeah.

Mr. Vassam.

Boy, willing.

How'd he get down out of the balloon?

I didn't go up with my own eyes.

I understand these men are after your ranch, Mr. Vassam.

Won a bite, offered me a fair price.

Told you, boy, willing butchered all kinds of illegal business clients.

Don't see any reason not to sell you.

Yes, I do.

You were disappointed because you hadn't struck all else.

But you've got something better than all on your property.

Gold?

Helium.

One of the raris gets his known, and one of the most useful.

Willing, I ain't gonna let you get away with this.

Me neither.

I don't care how many you are.

Take that lumbar to the left, Al.

Now I'll get the big fella.

I need you to find him.

All right, get going down the road.

Don't load her on the way.

If we catch you, Lauren, we'll send out some leather.

Hurry along.

You'll be sorry for this willing and show your friend up there.

He was someone who told you about it.

I know he did.

You're wasting your time.

Get going.

Oh, I said that the boy willing was a mean arm.

You remember, Lauren?

I don't know how to thank you, boy.

We can't stop for thanks right now, Mr. Baskham.

Only about half of our troubles are settled.

What's that?

Shoot.

Johnny must be trying to shoot him down.

Come on, before Smiley gets killed.

What were those shots?

I said you could shoot again, Johnny.

I was out of the milkhouse, boy, and got some food.

Smiley said he was hungry.

Oh, and I'm asking him that you try to shoot again, Johnny.

He said the reason he keeps going higher all the time

is because he's losing weight from hunger.

What was you doing, though?

Shooting food up to him?

I shot all six cartridges in my six shooter.

And he wants me to shoot more.

Miley, what's the matter with you?

There's only six shots in a six shooter.

Oh, there's more now.

There's 18 or 20.

I've seen him shoot 50 or 100 out of a six shooter

in a movie picture lots of times.

Hey, I'm going up again.

Oh, I lost more weight.

I lost my weight.

I probably keep going forever now.

Help me.

Golly, I'm up so high.

Nobody can even hear me anymore.

Oh!

Ooh, lame cold up here, too.

Shoot.

Hi, don't shoot.

I ain't no pigeon.

Why that one was close?

They're trying to kill me.

It's those two Clyde and Squitty.

They're trying to kill me.

Oh, oh, that didn't say got me.

I'm falling out.

Here he comes, grab him.

Oh, I got him.

Well, you'll teach you that cap everything you know.

Hey, hit him, Clyde.

You hold him and I'll hit him.

And I'll hold him and you'll hit him.

Ow.

Ow.

I'm wake up, smiley.

Slap again for you, still asleep.

Slap again for you.

Let me do that.

I can slap fun.

Johnny said on his feet.

Hey, the guy's low-cold.

Smiley.

One of us could get a hand-free to slap his face.

Smiley.

Smiley, come out of it.

Oh!

Oh, him saved.

Somebody saved me.

What's the matter with you?

Who saved me?

I'll give him a thousand dollars reward.

A couple of you, you've been having a nightmare.

Give it everybody else one.

Where's those villains?

That Clyde.

The blue one.

What?

Well, good morning, boys.

Good morning, he says, after all this.

I guess I must have had a bad dream, huh?

Well, I don't suppose there's any use trying to sleep now.

We may as well fix some challenge, start writing.

Well, that's just me just fine.

I'm kind of hungry at that.

So, uh, after breakfast, which way you headed?

Why we've been thinking of going to...

Oh, myself, I kind of undecided.

But you don't think?

I think I'll go that way.

No.

Oh, what is it?

I'll go this way.

Maybe, uh...

Erie, you suppose that way'd be better.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Running a cattle ranch is a big job.

But in the early days of the West, when all range land was unvanced,

it was an even tougher job.

The ranch owner had to depend, in the most part, on the skill and experience

of his foreman and cow planters to get the beef to market in prime condition.

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Molly, I want to thank you for appearing with us today.

Every time you come to see us, it's more enjoyable than the time before.

Well, thank you for it, and I can't leave without returning the compliment.

I just want to say, Kate.

Just a minute.

You're not leaving yet.

Look around you, man.

The boys have all got their six shooters ready.

Just like an in-moving picture.

If you take one step toward the door without singing Cecil could see, they're going to use them.

Oh, well, looks like we're going to have music, don't it?

Right.

This is the song Smiley wrote himself, friends, for his picture.

Outlaw from Powder River.

On the streets of the village stood Cecil,

with dark glasses and a cup in his hand,

with a look both pathetic and eager.

He cried, won't you help a poor man?

His clothes were all powdered and ragged,

and his world was as dark as the night.

But just let a pretty girl go by him,

and Cecil could see her all right.

Yes, Cecil could see what he wanted to see,

and he could be where he wanted to be.

He'll look onto the little herd Cecil with all.

Now Cecil no longer is free,

now Cecil no longer is free.

Once Cecil stole out through a pasture,

and there laid a row-flung and strong,

said Cecil.

My goodness, I'll bend you.

I'll just take this fine row-flow.

Of course Cecil, his eyesight was awful.

He just didn't see it somehow.

He'd never have taken that fine row.

He'd known it was tied to a cow.

Yes, Cecil could see what he wanted to see,

and be where he wanted to be.

He'll look onto the little herd Cecil with all.

Now Cecil no longer is free, is free.

Now Cecil no longer is free.

There are songs which become as much a part of life

as the air we breathe or the cells we walk.

There are songs that express a sincere and honest feeling.

And here's one of them, Red River Valley.

From this valley they say you are gold.

We will mend your brighter than we find.

For they say you are taking the sunshine

and as bright and as bright and as way of one.

I have waited a long time my dawn

for those words that you never see.

Not a last for my plumb hope have fallen.

For they say you are gold away.

Come and clear it by my side, if you'll away.

You not hate none to be near you.

But remember the Red River Valley

and the cowboy that love you.

That's about it for this time friends.

I'd like to thank Smiley Bernette again for being our guest today.

It's been a real pleasure to have you Smiley.

This is for Willing speaking for us, Louis.

Jean Walls, Johnny Paul and all of the writers of the Purple Sage.

Thanks so long and good luck to all of you.

From Hollywood you've heard your all star western theater,

a VMBare production starring America's Great Western Singers,

boy willing and the writers of the Purple Sage.

Smiley Bernette may soon be seen in the Columbia picture,

Boot Hill.

The script was by Ray Wilson, direction by Tom Hargess.

This is Terry O'Sullivan speaking.

This program came to you from Columbia Square.

KNX Los Angeles, 29 seconds until 7 p.m.

They say if you want to go fast, go alone.

But if you want to go far, go together.

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As a mutual insurance company, we're built for our customers

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Amika Empathy is our best policy.

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