Stop Judging Yourself & Own Your Dark Side (What They Won't Tell You) | Quazi Johir

0:00quasi here and in today's video I want to share with you how you can stop judging yourself and why you really must learn To own your dark side if you want to be successful not just in business, but in any Single area of your life Please stick around to the very end of this video because I'm gonna keep this as short as possible But also I'm gonna share with you the biggest epiphany that I just had recently that's made a huge shift to how I approach my business And how I approach every single area of my life and before I begin this video to quickly announce that I made a brand new bootcamp for you If you scroll down to the pin comments down in the comments section below You'll be able to get access to our exclusive bootcamp, which I really can't share on the channel as well as other bonuses Because you'll be getting direct access to our email list so without further delay Let's go right ahead and get started with this video. So what motivated this video was this book. I was rereading recently It's by Tim Grover. It's called Relentless and Tim Grover is this athlete or a personal trainer for athletes for like very very elite athletes like Michael Jordan

1:05Kobe Bryant and he shares his findings on what actually makes the greatest athletes succeed What sets the top one percent of the one percent and what makes them stay hungry and keep going at it even after they've won so many trophies And I've realized in my life, you know recently I've been struggling with this challenge of upgrading my program So for the past six seven months or so I've been working on recreating our program and making it even better And I've seen that you know, I've been struggling a lot with this and mostly with hesitation and doubt Because the program is already so good and customers are getting such great results already How do I improve it? How do I make it even better and this daunting task made me get in my head even more But I also realized that this moment of hesitation and doubt has always been there and it's always crept up But I've been able to deal with it better and just you know took the risk anyways And when I did you know take those risks and just go ahead and put myself in those uncomfortable situations

2:10Whether this be in you know trying out a new experiment in my business Not knowing what would happen. That's when I actually came out successful when I put myself out of my comfort zone That's when I actually became successful with whatever experiment I was trying So this led me to this epiphany that you know, we are constantly judging ourselves and trying to make ourselves perfect We're trying not to say the wrong thing You know, we're always walking on eggshells trying to say the right thing not to offend someone You know nowadays online It's just a slew of opinions out there everyone is offended you can't say the wrong thing You know, you might just hurt someone and this makes us retreat more and be more you know God did and not be able to freely express ourselves and do the things that we want to do And so in this way I realized this video is going to be controversial but Within every single one of us there is this dark side where we just don't give a shit You know, we just don't give a shit. We'll just go out and do what we want to do But most of us aren't owning it nowadays right?

3:10So most people nowadays they fail to achieve their goals because of this cognitive dissonance that we have We want something but we believe that it's not right to want it So ask yourself this if you're a business owner, right Maybe you want to make money But then in your mind you're like oh, I want to make money, but I don't believe it's right to want money How many times have you had this thought? I know I have I know that I was suppressing myself when I had this thought I wanted to make money I wanted to experience wealth and have that kind of financial freedom to be able to do what I wanted to do But then within me I was like oh, it's it's bad to want money rich people are evil You know, they're greedy and you know, they just chase money and You know this kind of opinion this kind of world view was instilled within me when I started watching TV and you know just Being accustomed to society and looking around me What other people were saying about rich people and I realized that this is what people said to themselves To be okay with being poor right so poor people kept telling themselves

4:15These excuses of oh, you know, it's okay to be it's much better to be poor than to be rich rich or evil just to be okay and justify themselves being in their comfort zones And so I was telling myself this story too so that I could be comfortable and justify my failures But as soon as I realized that as I was growing and maturing in my spiritual journey And I realized that these were the excuses that I were making to stay where I am That's when I snapped out of it and started to face the music and took responsibility for where I am Like you're poor and you're not succeeding at what you want to because these are the excuses that you make for yourself So like this every single day there are these excuses that we have that we don't own that we don't take responsibility for Just like that you have this dark side that keeps coming up Yeah, and you call it your dark side because you have all of these Desires and wishes, but you believe that it's wrong to want it or you believe that you won't be able to achieve it Just like with money, right? You're like, oh, I want all of this money, but you know what? It's only for the gifted it's only for the people who are born with this kind of wealth or born with that kind of talent and

5:18all the all the excuses that we keep making for ourselves So the point that I'm really trying to make with this is there are just these two sides of us at any given time And what we do is because we don't either believe that we can achieve it or we believe that it's wrong to want it We suppress this other side of ourselves and when we suppress when we push this other side of ourselves down And we don't live in accordance with our true desires. So think about it like this You have this real core desire right now Whatever it is good or bad, but then there's what you think you should want Okay, most people think that they should want something You're like, oh, why don't I sometimes it's the other way around people don't want something But then they force themselves to want it because they think it's right to want it For example, people think that they should want to you know make money and have a career when they really want to be an artist You know, they they could Care less about money. They want to be an artist and they want to express themselves and put their work out there and be recognized

6:24And be famous for it But then they judge themselves in thinking oh no, I shouldn't want this the fact that I want this means that I'm bad And I need validation and I have some sort of childhood problem that needs to be covered up instead of owning our You know insecurities and our failures and our mistakes what we do is we justify them and we suppress them And when you suppress them, guess what happens they come up later on in life right later on in life They express themselves in a way that's uncontrollable to you and if you look at Or some of these athletes who get involved in all these scandals What happens to them is their dark side starts owning them because they keep suppressing and repressing it They don't know how to channel it and how to own it So the first step always begins an acceptance of this dark side whenever you have all of these Desires and all of these thoughts You know our first reaction to these bad thoughts to these perverse thoughts is oh my god Why did I have this thought? But then there is an attitude towards that too

7:26And that attitude you get to choose how do you Respond to the natural reaction that's even coming to that thought itself So there's a negative thought But then there's a reaction to the negative thought based on societal conditioning where you believe it's right to have this thought Or it's wrong to have this thought we're constantly doing this by the way We're constantly judging whether it's right or wrong to feel this way or to think this way Instead of accepting and letting ourselves have this thought or have this feeling please notice this From day to day in your day to day life right now just notice whatever feeling and whatever thought comes up and the natural reaction to it What is the natural reaction and how do you feel how do you even respond to that reaction This if you can just do this one thing if you can just instead of judging that natural reaction even if you can just Let that reaction arise and let it pass you will become the master of your mind. I can promise you that So from now on whenever you have a thought that you don't like or a feeling that you don't like

8:27Choose the response that you have to it choose the response that you have to this reaction And I can promise you if you can just learn to do this and just learn to even watch You don't even need to respond to it just simply watch the reaction just silently watch it without any sort of judgment And see what happens over time you're going to be able to take a step back from all of this and Choose whichever response whichever reaction comes up naturally So all of these reactions that are arising right now they're naturally conditioned within us subconscious Based on what we've seen based on what we've heard based on what society told us When you think of money and then you feel negative about it you feel like oh no, it's bad to want it Oh, no, I can't have it that reaction too has been societally conditioned I remember I used to have this negative reaction towards money or negative reaction to success But then over time when I started to observe and notice this and acknowledge it and accept it instead of trying to fight it

9:32I was able to choose which reaction I wanted So now when I think of money and when I think of you know wealth my relationship to money and wealth is completely different From what it used to be before it was scorn it was like hatred towards it It was anger like the world is unfair. Why is it unfair? And now it's it's more of Money's available for everyone you can have whatever you want It's very simple to have what you want But this wasn't it wasn't like this before it's been conditioned This is how I conditioned and programmed myself and you can do this too if you simply just start Observing acutely observing these natural reactions that are already programmed within you And these natural reactions they're just habits. They're just habits because you've been accustomed to feeding to reacting like this Over and over and over again Okay, so the message of this video really is simple You know, you have all of these thoughts and desires Instead of judging them just begin by observing and watching them and letting them pass

10:35that's the first step and whatever arises Within you let whatever arises arise and let it pass and run its natural course What we do is I remember I asked this question in our youtube community like what drives you? What's your why and different people have different wise? I commented that my why was I'd never wanted to be mediocre I always wanted to be exceptional and you know not waste my potential this infinite potential And then someone else also commented that their why Was to be the best right to beat everyone else and be the best But then they also added this side comment which I found very interesting They said I know I shouldn't want this. I know I shouldn't want this But what I want is to be the best now you can see how this person was judging Themself for wanting what they want they're not owning their dark side They're simply reacting negatively to it instead if you simply own it and work with it

11:36And as you progress and mature in your spiritual journey your desires get purified They start to you know take on a different form For example at those lower levels of consciousness we get motivated by self and personal gain But over time what happens is as you keep going in this spiritual journey you keep looking within And starting to you know achieve your goals and starting to see how meaningless and fruitless it is Because you know that feeling doesn't last for too long Then that realization occurs within you that wait a second there must be something more Then you seek something more But that is a natural course of action. It's not something you can fake you can't tell yourself when you're poor that oh, you know It's bad to be rich Get rich first have the money first and then you can say that right So that's the point I was trying to make that's the first key letting whatever arise arise without any sort of judgment And number two is own your dark side Don't let it own you We let our dark sides own us when we repress and suppress it when we try to you know ignore it or resist it

12:44Right when we try to say oh this is wrong just stuff it down and just distract ourselves into focusing on something else When you do that your dark side starts to get control over you how our thoughts and feelings work is the They're They almost work in multiplication and division when you tell yourself not to think about something All you can do is think about that thing. It just keeps getting stronger the mind is Anti fragile, okay. This is a it's a book that I read recently by Nassima Nicholas Teleb and in it he talks about this concept of Fragility is something you know you do something to something you Give it chaos and it gets and it deteriorates But what's the opposite of that what quality is the opposite of fragility? It's anti fragility What can you keep Introducing chaos into but with this chaos it feeds itself and gets stronger. It's your thoughts So the mind is anti fragile whatever thoughts and feelings you have if you keep repressing and suppressing it It'll just keep multiplying and dividing and it'll get stronger and stronger until one day it owns you

13:49But you can own your dark side by simply accepting and acknowledging its existence and letting it be there And letting it take on the next form when the time is right So guys with that I conclude this video. Thank you so much watching quick recap of what we talked about Stop judging yourself. You have different sides to you Own them instead of trying to pretend that it's not there Own them and own your desires. Don't judge your desires if you desire to be the best in the world right now If you desire to be famous own that desire and channel it into whatever it is you want to channel it into and the two keys that we talked about are number one Whatever's arising right now let it arise and simply observe it in neutral attention Whatever reaction you have to whatever is arising even watch that You're the witness the silent observer of all of these you're not your reaction. You're not the thought of the feeling Number two Own your dark side and don't let it own you

14:50There's no point resisting and doubting and hesitating whatever you know now act With full commitment towards that and know that whatever feedback you need will be given to you in due time So guys with that I conclude this video. Thank you so much watching and please let me know what you thought of this I just wanted to make this a conversational style video no whiteboard no fancy writing I have my notes over here obviously because I was going to be prepared before sharing something maybe that's me judging myself But I hope you liked this video Let me know what you thought of it in the comments And if you're new to the channel make sure you like comments subscribe and hit that little bell there Right now so you're notified of every new video that I put out and if you'd like to work closer together with me My team for the reality mastery program. You can apply now click on the link in the description below to apply Now who we typically work with are people who are entrepreneurs and business owners who want to take their businesses to the next level But what they're finding is that they don't have a tactical or strategic or problem What they have is a mindset problem an internal problem You know, they can't really see themselves making more money

15:52And they only believe that they're worth a certain amount and unconsciously these hidden beliefs are governing their actions and what they're able to see what tactics and strategies They're even able to see and capitalize on if that sounds like you click on the link in the description to sign up Let's see if we can help and our free Facebook group is open free to take advantage of the link for that is also in the description Guys, thank you so much for watching. Till next time. Peace