The Falcon - The Case Of The Proud Papa

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Hello.

Yes, this is the Falcon speaking.

Oh, Diner.

I'm glad you called.

Now I have to have a rain check, angel. I'm all jammed up.

Some boy and I'll just figure out a way to make a fortune.

And I've got to prove to him that sometimes a million isn't worth shooting for.

This is Ed Hurley. He's friends and finding you to join the Falcon in tonight's drilling adventure.

As he solves the case of the proud Papa.

And all the cases of the proud Papa.

It's Wednesday evening in New York.

In a small hotel room on Manhattan's west side.

A brunette named Rita Jordan quenches her thirst.

And when Rita hears a knock on the door.

She hardly hides the bottle proving conclusively it doesn't contain soda pump.

Who is it?

May.

Just a second, Leo.

Hello, darling.

What were you doing that took you...

What's been kissing me?

Cut it out, Rita. It's smell like it's a loom.

Well, it's a nice thing to say.

I told you to lay off the stuff.

Honestly, Leo, I haven't had a drinking out of it.

Oh, you're kidding. Where's the bottle?

I told you.

Where is it, Rita?

Oh, oh, well.

In the bureau door.

Is that one?

Please, sweet heart.

You've got to understand and take.

If I don't have a drink, what are you doing?

You don't have a garbage disposal unit in this door.

No, Leo, don't.

Why did you do that?

Because I can't trust you.

I hate you, I hate you.

I don't know. You don't really mean that.

How?

You're crazy about me, aren't you?

No.

No.

Everything's going to work out real fine.

I just don't like this, Leo.

I can't.

Well, you don't have to.

You think I enjoy seeing my wife live in a crummy dive like this?

Don't you think I got a heart?

That's why I lined up Ernie Moore.

Ernie?

Yeah.

How are you doing in that department?

It says he's in love with me.

Well, that's wonderful.

You think it's wonderful he wants to divorce his wife and marry me?

Sure.

That shows you doing a fine job.

But that's only half of it.

Well, I can't do the rest.

Now, look, Rita.

You're going to go through with it or I'm through with you

and I'll make up your mind.

Well?

I'll get the money for Ernie.

You got a date with him tonight?

In a no.

Good.

Listen, Leo, couldn't I have just one small drink?

No.

Just to give me another one.

I said no, Rita.

But you do the job right and I'll buy you a case.

Now, go wash your face, baby.

We want you to look real pretty for the boy.

Yeah.

When is he home?

Well, I'm looking for him.

Oh, there she is.

Hello, Ernie.

How are you, Rita?

You're waiting alone?

He seemed like he is.

I hope he don't mind my ordering.

Of course not.

Look, that's stupid of me.

I went and finished your drink, too.

Waiter.

Waiter.

I think we'd better go around again.

Very good, my dear.

What's the matter, Ernie?

Look, I'm happy.

Look, I don't want to heckle Rita,

but don't you think you're drinking too much?

Are you going to start lecturing me, too?

Well, I only.

Why can't a girl take a drink without a sermon?

It's all right, darling.

No, it isn't all right, darling.

Just because I like to feel good for me

you think I was committing a murder or something.

I'm sorry, Rita.

No.

It's my fault, Ernie.

I'm sick.

But you're responsible.

I am.

Darling, can't you see I'm crazy about you?

When you know how I feel about you?

Yes, you say it, but you're mean.

Well, let me prove it to you.

I mean, by getting a divorce, I'll speak to Jonathan.

No, no.

Why not?

Because.

No solution to the problem.

You work for a father, don't you?

Yeah.

As long as you could job less if you and Janet both do.

Well, I don't care.

Well, I do care.

You know, we've got to use our heads, sweetheart.

If you just have a little money put away.

Well, it's no use talking.

I have it.

Well, why don't you get it from Janet's father?

Are you crazy?

I heard someplace called that she's one of the biggest loan sharks in the world.

Well, what's that got to do?

Well, it stands for reason.

A man like him would keep a lot of cash in the office.

Rita, you suggest.

Yeah.

Well, you're crazy.

You kill me.

I don't talk to a child, Janet.

I have a joy.

I don't tell you so.

Well, sure.

But there are no butts about it.

Victor had never done anything to hurt her and she's in love with you.

What do you find?

Let me look.

Ernie, I know women.

A girl like Janet will do anything to protect her man.

How much cash do Victor generally have around the office?

Want to get married?

Yeah, but generally.

Runs around 75 costs.

Well, think how far we could run with that.

How would you say, darling?

Am I with the gambler?

We're sure, but there we go with the butts again.

Well, and you make up your mind, give me a call.

I can't promise I'll wait too long.

Yes.

Mr. Waring.

That's right.

The fall comes.

Right again.

Do I know you?

You should.

My name is Paul Victor.

I spoke to you on the phone, yes.

Oh, yes.

Yes, come in.

What you said down?

What's the trouble?

Don't you think it's a problem?

What's the trouble? Don't you think I can take it standing?

I don't know what gave you the idea. I had anything unpleasant report.

But you have. Yeah, you know, generally I don't handle this kind of matter.

Well, I'm glad you made an exception in my case.

Well, I only did because you seem so concerned about your daughter.

And as you suspected, your son-in-law has been running around with a girl named Rita Jordan.

She's married to a petty lossy thief named Leo.

I don't believe you.

You don't believe what? That he's a petty lossy thief or that Ernie's been playing around.

Neither.

I don't understand you, Victor. You asked me to do some research on your son-in-law.

Obviously, you were suspicious. I was nothing of the kind.

I was merely interested in seeing how you private detectives operate.

And you were supposed to be the best.

No, I'm not so sure.

What do I owe you?

Or I'll settle for an explanation.

I'm afraid you won't get it.

You better take my check, Mr. Wearing.

You'll find it much more satisfactorily.

41, right?

23 left.

17, right?

93 left.

Where did I put that briefcase?

It's on top of the safe.

Victor.

I hope I haven't inconvenienced you, Ernie, but I had no idea.

Now, the inspector, I know what you think.

Well, what could I possibly think?

After all, what could be more natural than to find my son-in-law at my safe?

Of course, someone with an evil mind would say what is he doing there

after all the officers and with a gun no less.

But that would never occur to me.

So, I suppose you put the money back.

No, put it back, Ernie, and I won't say a word to Jan.

I don't care what you say to her when I just get out of my way.

I don't be a fool, Ernie. Are you going to dope?

I told you to let go!

No!

Victor, why didn't you mean it honestly?

Mr.!

It's all right, Ernie.

You can turn on the light. I'm not asleep.

I'm sorry, Janet, but you see...

Don't bother lying. I've got a call from Papa.

Is that a call from your father?

Yes.

When?

Ten minutes ago.

Then he isn't dead?

No.

You hit him in the shoulder.

I'm sorry, Janet, but you see...

Don't bother lying.

No.

You hit him in the shoulder.

Why did you do it, Ernie?

Janet, don't ask me anything.

I don't have to. I know it's her fault.

Her fault?

Rita Jordan.

What? Don't just see what she's doing to you. She's no good, Ernie.

Who told you about her?

Papa had her investigated by Mike Wearing.

She, you know, has been I just using her.

You're lying. She's not married.

Jordan's her husband's name.

He'll hear Jordan. He's a petty lousy thing.

You're crazy.

Oh, darling.

I don't care what you've done, but alone let this woman make a fool of you.

Papa promised he wouldn't say a word to the police.

You'll return the money that Ernie listened to me.

If this woman was any good, I'd let you go.

But she's watching.

You tell us that's all.

You have to make a blouse.

Well, that would help you one bit.

Do what your father can do what you want.

You're going to do what I want, beginning right now.

That clock, right, Britain?

No, no, it's 15 minutes there.

Well, I better beat it just the same.

No, don't go, Leo. Don't leave me alone.

How do you crazy?

You better douse yourself.

It's some of that taboo.

Your boyfriend will be here any minute.

My voice. And how can you say that?

Now, look, girl. Don't go temperamental.

I'll be waiting downstairs in the lobby.

When I see the schmo come in, I'll call you on the house phone.

As soon as he forks over the dough, send him out for a couple of minutes.

What am I telling you?

What am I telling you?

Tell him you got a headache. Tell him you need to ask.

That's a good excuse.

Where's he, Rita?

Leo. I'm her cousin.

Yes. Leo, this is any more.

Well, I've heard a lot about you, fella.

Rita's done nothing but talk about you all night.

Well, I guess you love her a lot.

That's a minute, too.

You must think I'm pretty stupid.

How's that? You're a husband.

No, any honest.

You shouldn't have done that, any.

Once you know Eve's droppers, never hear anything good about themselves.

Leave me for a sucker.

That's right. What are you going to do about it?

Honey, you just wait and see.

Oh, he's a mean one, isn't he?

Don't, Leo.

Leo, please no more.

Hey, body of this, Rita. We're just having fun.

And he's getting a kick out of this, too, aren't you?

Stop.

Hello?

Is this Miss Rita Jordan?

Yes.

Well, this is a desk clerk.

I've been trying to reach you for the past half hour.

Oh, what is it?

I hate to bother you, Miss Jordan, but the party in 209 has been complaining of a disturbance.

Oh, I haven't made any noise.

Only claims he heard someone yelling.

Well, he's mistaken. It's been absolutely nobody here.

Miss Jordan.

Miss Jordan.

Miss Jordan.

Oh, am I interrupting?

Oh, well, but it isn't Mr. Victor.

I'll leave you to alone now.

Thanks, Ed.

Yes, I have.

Thank you.

What happened to your arm?

My arm?

Well, you weren't wearing it in a sling the last time we met.

Well, it's a long dull story.

Well, I'll take your word. What's on your mind?

Have you seen this?

In fact, a Brunette slain hotel room.

Rita Jordan, age 29.

Rita Jordan.

Yes, they're holding my daughter for the murder.

Your daughter?

This is Janet Moore. You know. You checked her husband for me.

Yes, so I did.

Well, now I'd like you to work for her.

And of course, she's innocent.

Well, of course.

How could Janet have killed Rita when I did?

But you say, I seem to have surprised you, Mr. Wearing.

Perhaps you can do as much for the police.

Shall we go?

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Well, if it isn't the one and only Mike Wearing the Falcon.

Well, that's five dollars, I owe myself.

I knew you were going to say that, Corbett.

Yeah, probably it's for me to disappoint you.

And I'm Mr. Victor.

Sergeant Corbett, homicide.

My brother-in-law is one of his best customers.

Says he's rather borrow money from Victor than a bank.

Well, please thank him for me.

Now, be glad to.

Well, what's the matter with your arm?

That's another story.

Well, why not tell it now? I haven't heard a good one in years.

You must be hanging around with a dull cross.

Now, Mike, that's no way to talk about yourself.

Whatever happened to the typical dumb cop we used to hear about it.

They've all gone into television.

What's on your mind?

Well, I'm working for Janet Moore.

Janet Moore.

You're holding for the Rita Jordan kill.

Her husband hired you?

No, Mr. Victor did. He's her father.

Well, if you're working for it, it's the reason she's innocent.

But of course.

You won't think me bold if I ask who did kill Rita Jordan.

I did.

What?

And I don't regret it.

She was destroying my daughter's happiness.

Oh, that's very noble of you, Victor.

I'll tell you, I killed her, Sergeant.

But to do with a knife.

It's sharp jokes.

I disposed of it in the customized fashion.

And what is a customary fashion?

I threw it down a sewer.

Oh, what do you say, Sergeant?

I say you better get yourself another confession.

Why?

Well, there are a couple of things wrong with Victor's.

First of all, we have a signed confession from his daughter.

Well, yes, she made it to protect me.

Let me see that. I can assure you it's in perfect order.

I tell you I killed this Jordan woman.

Well, that was a knife you didn't.

According to this, Rita was shot to death.

Yeah. Well, it's been nice seeing you, Mike.

Dropped in again when you get another confession.

I just love hearing them.

Yes? I'm looking for any more.

I'm sorry, Mr. I'm very busy.

Oh, this won't take long.

You better get out of here.

I don't care.

Did you say wearing?

I must have.

You're working for my wife.

That's right.

Well, I'm glad to meet you wearing.

I was just on my way to your place.

I don't think you were to farm me there.

My wife didn't kill Rita, Mr. Wearing.

You signed a confession?

She did it to shield me.

You need it?

Yes, I killed her.

Come again, please.

But when I got nearer, I just couldn't think straight.

And all the while she was just using me.

She got me to steal from my father-in-law.

He caught me.

That I'll Victor with shot?

Yes.

I must have been crazy.

Then when I went over to see Rita, her husband was there.

I can't see what happened.

Look at my face.

I've been admiring it since I walked in.

There's nothing more to tell.

When I came too, Jordan was gone.

I still had the gun. I used it in my father-in-law.

And you used it on Rita?

Yes.

Isn't it funny how you can love somebody one minute and hate him the next?

It's the funniest thing in the world.

Janet is worth a million of her.

And I was so stupid I was ready to give her up.

Look what she's trying to do for me now.

Sure. You still got the gun?

Yes.

Yeah.

Well, I think there's a lot to do with it.

All right, Ernie, let's go.

Oh, no. Don't tell me you're back again.

All right, Sergeant. I won't tell you.

You know him?

Yes, sure. How are you, Mr. Moan?

Fine.

Well, what's on your collective mind?

Break it to him, gently, Ernie.

My wife didn't kill Rita, Sergeant.

I know it was her father. We've been all through that.

Are you wrong?

I killed him.

You what?

Look, Mike. Is this another one of your gag?

Oh, what do you know? So this is the murder weapon.

Hey, part of Victor with a tube.

Funny it didn't seem to have been fired lately.

Well, he explained that to me.

He cleaned it before he put it away.

But there's one thing I'd like Mr. Moan to explain.

This is a 32-cold automatic.

So, Rita was killed with a German luger.

She watched you heard me.

But just so it shouldn't be a total waste, here's the gun back.

Maybe you'd like to use it on yourself.

All right, take it easy, I'm coming.

Wow, well, you look who's here.

I guess you remember me, Jordan?

Sure, it's Moor, isn't it? Ernie Moan.

Yeah. Well, what's on your mind?

Your wife's murder.

Yeah, I've been thinking about it too.

I don't know how I'm going to get along with that, Rita.

Your homestead won't seem the same without all those empty bottles.

Please claim my wife killed her.

Yeah, I heard it on the radio.

I understand she made a confession.

She didn't do it, Jordan.

She confessed to protect me.

Oh, that was real nice if it wasn't.

But that's a woman for you.

Now, you even take Rita.

You've tried that, didn't you?

Now, you'd be surprised as she knocked herself out for me.

Now, some people might think I was just a big overgrown slob, but to Rita.

I was the greatest thing since my teenage.

You killed her.

Now, you don't know what you're saying, Ernie.

Yes, I do.

You're going with me to see Mike wearing.

Why would I want to see him?

Tell him the whole story.

Obviously, you're a boy who doesn't learn from experience.

You think so?

Well, you forgot the lesson I taught you.

Just lucky for you that I'm a patient man.

So I don't mind teaching you again.

Come here, Ernie. Time to call the class to order.

It's actually, it's actually.

I give you a lift, son.

Oh, I would want to trouble you.

No trouble at all, Mr. Wearing.

You seem to know me.

The Balkans are famous New York landmarks, like the public library.

That's pretty good.

I wish I hadn't done back in.

Wouldn't be a gun in your pocket.

Wouldn't it?

I guess it would.

Get in.

Want me to sit on your friend's lap?

Move over around.

Any more excuses?

Wish I could think of a couple.

Maybe you'd do better inside.

All right, Al.

Find us some nice, quiet spot where we can talk.

Am I my no hydromatic?

Oh, I always busty when he steals a car.

Oh, you're a Leo Jordan, aren't you?

Who told you that?

I recognized you from your description.

It's off the side here about your wife.

Thanks.

Got any ideas who killed him?

No, but I understand you have.

Where do you understand that from?

Ernie Moore.

Ernie says you're fixing the pit and the rap on me.

Well, I hadn't considered it before.

But now that you have, I think it's a great idea.

So you would go on a friendly, huh?

I don't think you need one, Leon.

I'm sure a little investigation will cover enough evidence to send you to the chair.

And if you don't turn up anything, you'll manufacture it.

You really know me, don't you?

I know plenty like you.

Let me give you a little tip-wearing.

Keep out of my hair.

And if I don't, then you got to expect me to get into your show.

Now, back to the adventures of the falcon.

You are in the past since my swearing learned that you can increase your height by either wearing elevators,

shoes or getting a wrap on my mug.

Now, as Mike comes to.

Ooh, this is a peachy one, mate.

You ought to get a big rise out of this one.

Where am I?

Here's a Bronx suit.

Somebody must drop you off headfirst.

And when I heard about it, naturally, I dashed down.

Sure, thanks.

Oh, don't thank me, Mike.

This sort of thing doesn't happen often enough to suit me.

Well, who did it this time?

Leo Jordan.

Rita's husband?

Yes, why?

He thought I was trying to frame him for a murder.

Were you?

Yes, sure.

That's the way I operate.

Look, Janet didn't kill Rita Jordan.

Don't tell me you got another confession.

I couldn't stand that.

Well, Mrs. Moore is innocent.

But then who'd done it?

I don't know.

Let's get all our suspects together and we'll play Blind Man's buff.

And if that doesn't work?

Well, I can always take Jordan's idea and frame somebody.

Hand me my head and let's go.

Ernie.

Hello, Janet.

Oh, Ernie, what have they done to you?

Nothing, honey.

Oh, you poor darling.

Janet, come here.

You ought to have nothing to do with him.

Hold, Papa.

Please.

Oh, he's right, baby.

I've given you enough trouble already.

Oh, that doesn't matter.

Janet.

Flavor alone, Victor.

This is a very touching thing.

Keep out of this, Jordan.

I wish I could.

But a fellow named Wearing insisted on my being here.

Someone messing my name?

Yeah.

Oh, hello, Leon.

Been here long?

Too long.

Good.

All right, Victor.

Sorry we had to do this.

Oh, well, that's perfectly all right.

Well, I knew you'd take it like the Grand Trooper, you are.

Well, Mrs. Moore and gentlemen, not to keep you in suspense.

We are gathered here tonight to determine who killed Rita Jordan.

In this case, it's complicated by one thing.

We had three confessions, which is two over par.

So obviously, someone was lying.

Well, it wasn't me.

If you tried framing me.

Oh, we don't have to do that, Jordan.

You're no problem at all.

You're the only one in our little care, so it didn't confess.

So, no, obviously, you didn't kill Rita.

Now look, Wearing.

No, I'm sure of it, Ernie.

He has no motive.

If you wanted to get rid of his wife, all he had to do was walk off.

Well, Janet didn't kill her.

Yes, I do.

I don't believe it.

And you shouldn't.

Especially when you know the truth.

Are you insane?

Yes, I am.

You killed Rita Jordan.

Now listen, you don't complain, Ernie.

I especially staged this little scene down here in jail,

so you wouldn't have to do any more traveling.

I'll try and show her the appreciation.

Hey, Mike.

Yeah.

There's something I wanted to ask you.

Far away, Sergeant.

Say that sometime when I got my service revolver handy.

What's bothering you, little man?

Well, I can see why Ernie killed Rita.

Can you?

Yeah, yeah.

Like he said.

He hated it.

But what gets me is why he confessed.

Hello, it's a smart move, Sergeant.

Ernie knew sooner or later we'd get around to him,

so he beat us to the punch and offered himself as a sacrifice.

But you noticed he gave himself an out.

Oh, you mean the business of the gun?

Yeah.

He disposed of the logo he was on red end, got the cold automatic.

He knew the minute you saw it, you'd be positive he was innocent.

Well, I was.

Yeah, sure.

And once you gave him a clean bill of health,

you would probably never bother him again.

You'd think it was a man who was just trying to protect his wife.

But you saw through his dark, nefarious plan.

Well, it's not what you'd expected me.

Oh, of course, of course.

After all, aren't you the one and only falcon?

But here's something you wouldn't expect to me.

What's that, Sergeant?

We've been coming to Ed's lunch in that every week for years.

And always you grab the checks.

But tonight?

Tonight's different.

Tonight?

I'm gonna pay my own.

I'm gonna pay my own.

I'm gonna pay my own.