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About this Episode
After a long weekend away, Sam had a transcendental experience with some fudge. Aleks doesn't care for fudge. This is the episode. We also briefly discuss:
-Sam being too stoned to recognise what's creepy and what isn't
-Aleks' inverse reactions to psychoactive drugs
-A brief stopover for Cherry Pie
-More fudge
For Bonus Episodes and Ad Free listening: https://patreon.com/wflpodcast?utm_medium=unknown&utm_source=join_link&utm_campaign=creatorshare_creator&utm_content=copyLink
SYDCOMFEST SHOW: https://www.sydneycomedyfest.com.au/event/small-claims-court/
Sam's Brisbane Shows: https://goodchatcomedy.com/shows/sam-bowden-bombing-the-hang/
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Transcript
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I think it's pretty lunchtime.
Alex, do you want to hear a joke I wrote yesterday?
I would love that, Sam.
This is my impression of a woke Viking.
Yeah.
No, just the pillaging for me.
That's good. That's good. That's really good.
If we just go north, north, south for north, south.
What I thought of after my run, this is the process of comedy.
I think depression is so strong because it makes everything so serious.
It's really hard to get out of self-seriousness.
I figured out I was like, you want to know how to, because I did it and it works.
A little life hack to get out of depression.
Just a small moment is listen to EDM, and it works best if you have a gatorade with you.
Time your first sip with the drop.
Beautiful, I love it.
So it feels like you're in the ads.
Great, gorgeous.
That's fantastic.
No one has depression in the gatorade ad.
There's something fun about feeling, if you're everything in your life is so serious,
put yourself in the gatorade ad.
You'll feel like a dickhead for a second, and then you go,
and it's just a brief moment of respite.
Yeah.
It's a nice little exhale.
Dude, I can, I will see you, and I'll second you.
Something happened.
Mission I went, as you know, mission I went away to the Blue Mountains for a few days, for a birthday.
And we were sitting, I think it was echo point, and it was cold.
It was like the coldest day of the year so far in the Blue Mountains.
It was like a maximum of 13.
It was freezing, and we're standing there.
It's really quiet, and then this gust of wind just comes to the canyon,
and it's really, really cold.
She just goes, now it feels too far.
That's good, that's fine.
Bring it back.
Put yourself in an advertisement.
Pull yourself in an advertisement.
Across the board, I think it's good for your mental health.
It is, yeah.
Except I feel like now realistically, I just feel like this spokesperson for orthopedic shoes.
Yeah, well, that's fine in itself.
My ads have gotten less cool the older I'm getting.
Even the lady in the hemorrhoids out is smiling.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
Because if you've got to do with the hemorrhoids, you still got to finger your butt.
I was going to say, she gets to put a little dick up her butt every single day.
A little cream-based dick.
Yeah.
When I had hemorrhoids, man, you know how?
Honestly, when people go like, do you, like, the reason I'm so sensitive as an adult now,
people go like, people attribute it to having older sisters,
but I think it's for like a year when I was 16 years old,
I put tiny cream dicks up my butt.
Yeah.
I think that'll humble you in terms of that warrant.
You can't be in the manosphere.
You can't be very taken by the manosphere while you're putting tiny cream dicks in your butt.
Oh, yeah, yeah, 100%.
It's a deeply vulnerable thing to do as an adult.
Yeah.
While you put alone a 16 year old boy in the most developmental period of your, like, masculine,
like brain, like the testosterone part, you have to feel what it's like for your,
for your anal glands to accept the accept of a cream-based dick like a UFO takes a cow.
Yeah.
Yeah, man, it's a weird intersection chemically as well.
Yeah.
You're going through puberty.
Suddenly medically, you have to touch your body.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
I understand it's more questioned than answers.
Yeah, man.
I never got hemorrhoids until I was about 26 because my dad when I was like eight years old,
described what happens if you push a poo too hard because I used to shoot with the door open.
I used to really bug him and then one day he saw me, I was like, I read in the face,
he goes, don't force it.
I'm like, okay, why he goes, you know, Stu, I'm like, yeah, yeah, his butt fell out.
Whoa.
Yeah, he prolapsed.
Yeah, that can happen.
That's fucked up that can happen.
Because I had more questions.
He was like, if you push too hard, your intestines come out your butt.
Yeah.
And it's really painful to get back in.
Yeah.
I'm like, oh my god.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I heard about that in promise.
But someone described his, someone shout out all of their intestines and died.
I wasn't sure that, but just in case.
It was enough.
The fear came back.
Yeah.
Pushing too hard while you were shooting.
Not even once.
That is it.
The kid just described a friend who had dysentery.
Yeah, I guess so.
Because I feel like that's the final form of it as you just shoot at you.
You shoot at everything.
Yeah.
What a horrible way to go.
It's a terrible way to go.
It's so not fear that you can go in horrible ways, dude.
Yeah, I know.
When people describe like, you know when they show like animation or like illustrations of death being like welcome home.
It's a kid, but I shat myself there.
Yeah.
Like, it's not this warm embrace of like a maybe right after, but you die in such a horrible way.
Yeah.
I feel like even death would be like.
Ew.
Ew, dude.
But like walking through the beach at like Normandy.
Yeah.
You guys had this fucking lower torso.
I was crying for his mom.
He's holding his fucking Catholic Bades.
Yeah.
It's like, ugh.
Yeah.
Gross.
Give me that guy that's just sleeping peacefully.
Yeah.
That's a nice transition into death.
The warmth that people looks like it's actually a very, you have it's just a gentle goodbye.
It's like, but you shat yourself into oblivion.
That's disgusting.
That's one disgusting, a horrible way to go.
That's the memory that you leave.
Yeah.
Death does not wait for you at the fucking Texas chili cookoff.
Yes.
Yeah.
Because you chose to eat a four million scoval chili.
He's not there being like, I'm gonna give this guy a warm embrace and tell him he's welcome.
Yeah.
You fucking fat idiot.
That's it.
He won't even play chess with you.
He's just bullying you.
How you died?
Yeah.
Because you took what was probably like some very important, but like a chili pepper.
That was very important for like a psychedelic experience to ancient like Amazonian tribes.
And you put it on like a cheese hot dog.
Yeah.
And it mixed with the processed pork.
You have like a hallucination diarrhea on your way into it.
Like that's fucked up, man.
Yeah, man.
It's the best high level.
Get the end because you used to do it.
It's hallucination diarrhea.
You have diarrhea so hard.
You, you see God.
That's the part that everybody, wait, do you, could you diarrhea in what is it?
I think ayahuasca was spew.
Oh, okay, okay.
I'm sorry about that.
I think it's spew.
And I've done that enough now.
I'm like, yeah, but by all accounts, by all accounts.
And ayahuasca spew is like a different thing.
And I don't mean in good way.
It's like the worst spew will ever, you will ever do.
Followed by however you were feeling just before you did this.
Yeah.
But times 10,000 billion.
Yeah, right.
Would you ever do an ayahuasca circle?
I would probably, I might do it in, I probably do it in South America.
But here's the thing that like the people that do ayahuasca, it's, I feel like once you do ayahuasca,
you become an ayahuasca guy.
Yeah.
And that's case the fuck out of me.
Yeah.
I mean, I think that kind of happened with weed.
But I can function on weed.
Well, weed is still like, I'll tell you what.
This is the thing about stepping, like these stepping out of the matrix to a degree where like you can and everyone's like,
okay, yeah, you can still exist sort of one toe in with the matrix.
Like because like weed at some point would have been stepping out of the matrix.
Yeah.
But then enough people started smoking weed that it's socially like, oh yeah, we smoke weed or whatever.
Yeah.
But ayahuasca just a couple too many steps out.
Yeah.
That's like now you're, you, you have broken out of the matrix, but you still have to go to work.
Yes.
But now you are insisting on wearing hemp pants.
Yeah.
Like, and you have not shaved.
You smell like shit.
But you stink, can't.
And the idea, the idea, it's like, no, it's, it's enlightenment.
It's like, well, brother, enlighten my balls into your mouth because that's a disgusting way to,
all the people that love you in your life, now they've got to deal with that.
Yeah.
That's, that's, it's the same way I feel about any sort of like my life's about to change overnight, kind of shit.
Yeah.
Where it's, it's, it is radicalization, isn't it?
Like, in a way, like being like, I've, I'm, I've opened my third eye so much that you win no longer the same.
Yeah.
It's like, yeah, this is, we still have to exist in the same space.
It's inconsiderate.
Yeah.
And now be part of the mental prison that we all have to be part of.
Yeah.
Brother, come on.
Help us do up the walls.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's like, dude, if you spend your whole life looking out your third eye, you just, you're like, you're like, it's the superior already complex that it,
but it's entirely unrelatable to anyone that still wants some foothold in the world.
Yes.
That's, yeah, that's just the one.
It's your friends that go off into the stock market and crypto, at least you can ride in the early and beginning sometimes.
While they tell you what means nothing.
Yeah.
There's, there's something about, it's like, at least it's like chasing riches and wealth.
That's fucking all bullshit.
I'm like, yeah, but I get to go on the boat sometimes because I know this guy.
Yeah.
There's nothing you can do for me as part of the community as an ayahuasca guy.
Yeah.
You're just, now you're a burden.
I have to pay your rent.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And you're going to overcharge me to get ayahuasca that you're going to ask me to take.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I didn't need park and it's not going to be the same.
Yes.
There's something about it to me.
I was like, this, this feels kind of sacred in a way that like, I think I need to be in the place where this is from for this to work.
Yeah.
Because it feels, it feels like with the moment you take that and we, you go to some dudes apartment who has five flatmates, three of them are strippers, two of them smoking doors.
Yeah.
And it's just, I'm like, this is not what this was meant to be for at all.
It's like what I candy flipped, but I do the wrong way around.
I took acid at MDMA, but I, I can't remember which one I took first, but I had a terrible time.
And that's when acid shouted at me.
Right.
And it's that it was the last time I ever took a full tab.
And that was fucking six years ago, seven years ago, because acid was like, why not a fucking party drug?
You fucking idiot.
Yeah.
Oh my god.
Sorry.
I'm so sorry.
I just wanted to like feel nice in the pool.
What are you doing?
Come on, man.
That's what a joints for you dickhead.
There's 32 people.
They're all your brothers, friends.
You all went to school with them.
This is a terrible fucking idea.
You've tried to have sex with her three times.
Yeah, man.
Oh.
Acids only ever been my friend.
And that's why I'm never going to do acid again, because it's one of those things where I'm like, we were good together for a little bit.
But now I have, now I have a lot more to lose.
Like, the time for my brain to go crazy would have been the time that I was doing it.
You know what I mean?
Up until then, it was, it was a pure just like, I'll tell you what, if anything.
Acid was a support every time I've done it.
Acid was like, we're going to get through this.
Yeah.
You just need a hold on.
When we're doing mushrooms, there was no voice that's just like, just hold on.
Acid still had some of the MDMA in this.
I've been like, but I'll tell you what's fun.
Your hips.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You're right, man.
This is sick.
Yeah.
I do it again, but it would need to be under very specific circumstances.
Cause I've just like, I've really felt like I've done it since, but only in really small amounts.
Like only in really small amounts to the point where it just feels like I've just, I've just really high.
Yeah.
Like taking a quarter tab, a half a tab in the afternoon at home.
Yeah.
Fucking watch Rick and Molly.
Yeah.
I never broke through anything.
I only ever get to the point of acid where I've like sat people down and talk to them about, talk about them, about all of the plot of Dragon Ball Z,
starting from episode one to the end of the blue saga, while they watch the sunset behind me.
I think I was responsible for like two people's bad trips while I was having a great time.
Yeah.
Cause they would try to we want themself.
And you're like, okay, so Piccolo, you need to understand in season three, Piccolo decides that he has to take matters into his life.
And they're all there just being like, why are we getting coke energy from acid from Alex?
Yeah.
Cause I'll tell you what was great and what was more empowering is there was another guy that was inspired by the Dragon Ball Z chat.
And he was like, you guys talk about Dragon Ball Z and he was high as well.
Yeah, man, I'm running them through the entire series. He's like, fuck, have you gone to the cell song? Yeah, I was like, we're about to start.
He's a dude.
You're looking at two people lost in the light.
Just like, oh, I think there's noise in the background. I'm trying to tune it out.
We were literally at that park that you saw the city build and then go back down.
Oh, yeah, literally at that exact park.
Yeah, fuck it up.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's hectic, man.
Yeah.
Yeah, you have a co-reaction to acid.
You have a meth reaction to mushroom.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's all the inverse brother.
It's like, I go up on weed now.
I go up on weed.
Alcohol does kind of nothing for me anymore.
Oh, no, that's not true.
But it's just as I go, I feel the old alcoholic Slavic jeans kicking up being like, this is how you turn to a dude with just like at the bar with no teeth and the cheeks that fold over.
Like they turn into jails.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
That's the end of the line for that.
Oh, yes.
Yeah.
No, the mushrooms is done for me.
We're never doing it again.
Thank you for your, honestly, whatever being is in charge of fucking with me.
Thank you for the little knock on my brain door.
But I'm done with you.
No one's home.
No, fair enough.
Fair enough.
Oh, my God.
If I ever meet that cunt.
If I ever meet the God in charge of mushrooms.
That's the only one I'm more interested in going deeper.
Because they, but I'm also like, I'm crazy conscious of having my mind fall down.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
Because I, who was I talking to the other day?
It was a comic and they were like, I'm, I'm feeling all right.
I did a, I did a, I did.
I think it was five grams of mushrooms.
Is that a lot?
A heroic dose is three.
Oh, okay.
Well, yeah.
All right.
I was like, what, what, what, what are you, how are you feeling?
Like, I'm good, man.
I'm good.
It was, it was a lot.
I'm like, yeah, I never, I like to wake up the next morning after a mushroom tripping like that was so much fun.
Yeah.
And I need to do this.
It's supposed to be a vacation.
Yes.
My brain just needs a little vacation.
I want food to taste good.
I want stuff to move.
Yeah.
I want to just be a little silly.
Yeah.
And now that's, as we've discussed on the pod and now the last couple of times, anytime the adrenaline has peaked,
I'm like, let's go do some fuck shit.
I'm like, let's go do some fuck shit.
That's how you turn into the Manson family.
Yeah, exactly.
No, but I just, I don't mean, I, you know what I mean when I say fuck shit.
I'm like, no, I'm, I'm fucking interested.
Let's see if we can drive a car.
Yeah, yeah.
But you want to go into the neighbors back yard.
Yeah.
I want to see if we can find the neighbors.
Yeah.
See, that's the fucking neighbors.
That's where the Manson family started.
They weren't, by the way, they just thought let's go kill them.
They were like, let's go see what the neighbors are up to.
And then they turned into, what if we kill them?
I don't know what to say.
It was a really weird experience.
I fall over.
I graze my knee.
The pain is acute.
And all of a sudden, the Vikings made sense.
And I was like, oh, fuck.
I'm alive.
Yeah.
I was like, holy shit.
I had so much energy to do fucking anything.
I'm like, oh, I've never felt this on Shrooms before.
One thing that I am looking sort of forward to into, like,
of like the normalization of psychedelics.
And the fact that it's like, now it's in the medicinal phase.
Everyone's going to get it used to it.
So eventually it will just turn into like, you can just buy it.
Yeah.
Whatever.
I hope I'm alive to see like LSD survivor.
Where it's like psychedelic reality TV.
Where it's, it's still, it's still all the same shit.
But they've just loaded them up with LSD.
We've spiked all your water supply with huge amounts of LSD.
Yeah.
You are in the middle of a Fujian jungle.
Yeah.
Make it work.
Yeah.
And we were putting puzzles in front of you.
Yeah, yeah.
And then you still have to vote each other out.
But it's based on just, it's just like, I don't know me.
I'm getting a red aura from this kind of.
Oh, dude, I don't know what show it is.
It looks like it's quite old.
I've been seeing this.
I've been seeing this thing.
And it's, it's, it's a little sexist, but it just makes me laugh.
And it makes me feel a real kinship with men.
Is it was like a men and women surviving on an island.
It's been doing the round so hard.
It looks like it's maybe from about 2004.
And the whole point is they get dropped on an island.
There's a team of about 15 dudes and 15 women.
There are adjacent islands to each other.
They have a series of tasks.
They have to get from the breakers to the shore.
Yeah.
Then they have to get to a point on the map.
And from there, they need to figure out water.
They need to figure out food.
They need to figure out a campsite.
And it cuts to the women.
And they're like, there was a snake there.
And it was so hard.
We don't have any water.
I haven't drunk water for 12 hours.
Oh, oh, there's a came and crocodile.
Oh, no, no, we can't.
We can't.
And it's just cuts to the boys.
And now there's like five of them jumping on this crocodile.
Like riding a moose.
One of them drives a fucking knife through its head.
They cook it up.
They've built a net.
They're fishing.
Like they just have in the best time.
They've got so much water.
They've got a campfire on the beach.
And I'm just like, ah, you know what?
I know this edit or this show was stacked to make it look like this.
Yeah.
There's no way this wasn't even picked.
For sure.
But at the same time, I'm like, that looks like so much fun.
Just nature healing, dude.
The boys back out.
The boys just killing crocodile.
That's so sick.
Because also, by the way, it just takes one to build up the confidence.
That's the thing.
You kill your first crocodile, I think, with the fellas.
You go, boys, we can fucking do this.
And I think you start to hear the drums in your head.
Yeah.
Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.
Boom, boom, boom.
Boom, boom, boom, boom.
Yeah.
You start to erase internally all of the white within you.
Yeah.
And you're like, fuck, we're about to be back connected with the land.
Good.
Fuck this building shit.
We've lost it.
I'm deconal, I'm rising my mind.
Dude.
We watched the coach.
Did you watch any of the coach ownership?
Yeah.
Okay.
I've seen pockets.
The problem I have with it is that.
is that aside from the strokes and Bieber,
I was going through this, just being like,
who the fuck is Nina Giracci?
What the fuck is Somba?
Nina Giracci is this.
Nina Giracci, you should get around Nina Giracci.
She's our most famous Australian.
She's Australian.
Australian chick, electronic artist.
Great, really good.
Really good.
I watched the strokes shout out the draft.
I watched Reptilia, it's quite like Reptilia.
If I hear last night, one more time, I swear to God.
Never even heard of Reptilia.
It's a relatively popular song of theirs.
It's good, I like it.
Oh, that's what it got.
Last night came up on my feet.
I'm like, I'm so sick of this fucking song.
Why?
I hate it.
I've heard it so many times.
Last night, she said, oh baby,
it feels so down.
Actually, for real, I have no concept of the strokes.
I know they exist, I know they're a band
that's very popular in people like,
but they exist in the place of the 1975, for me,
where the fans put me off.
Yeah, that's fair.
I like the 1975 now because I was forced to watch live
at Madison Square Garden, that they're very best.
Well, they're at their very best right now.
Now I love them, they're great.
But they're Rick and Morty sort of thing,
where I'm like, it's good, take me a while
because you're fans, we're Doc Martins,
and they look kind of annoying.
That's just sort of, it's like,
it just sort of comes down to the indie,
what I'm getting from the fans,
the indie sleigh sort of private school sort of energy.
You know what I mean?
Of like, everyone's trying to dress like David Byrne
a little bit in the 80s.
Yeah, yeah, that's kind of what I'm getting from.
I feel like you could group strokes fans and 1975 fans
into a style of musical fans I call hesitation marks,
spelled M-A-I-X.
Well, it's just suicidal commies
who are relatively between 14 and 19 years of age,
predominantly women.
Yeah.
And men who don't want to be seen at a 1975 concert.
Yes, and if they do, they're a problem.
That's the other thing.
And if they do, I don't trust you.
The only appropriate way to be a man
at a 1975 concert is with a hat on in your head down.
Yes, with your girlfriend.
Yes, doing the shame shuffle.
Yeah, because I was thinking about this,
it's like, if they come back into it,
because I missed them the last time we were out,
if they come back,
because another album is fucking well over to you for them.
What was the last one?
Being funny in a foreign language, 2022.
That's pretty much all the music from at their very best.
And if I would really like to go,
I figured you'd really like to go.
I'd love to go in there.
I need to bring the girls.
Yeah, 100%.
You and I can't just be there.
I think you're allowed to be gay.
You're allowed to be gay.
I think people can assume that we're gay.
That's true, yeah, yeah, fair enough.
And then 1975, if we scream madty-healy enough,
you can either be there, actually, that's the thing.
You can either be there with a girlfriend
or the shame shuffle as a gay man with your couple,
with your gay friend, or gay friend, gay boyfriend,
or with a sign that says,
I'm only here because I liked Maddie Healy
on the podcast where he said all the fuck shit.
That's great.
That's great, just on Maddie.
That's it.
Yeah.
Getting mad because they keep cutting him off
at the intro where he's about to say something really stupid.
I mean, finishing that sentence for him, yes.
So I think he should be with the dude in it.
A bad driver.
Yeah.
Fuck you.
He's playing a dumb song.
I thought, I came here for the rally.
Yeah.
Coachella, sorry.
Yes.
David Boone, actually.
He did a great one.
Yeah.
David Boone existed in such a weird area for me,
where like the talking heads,
also another band I sort of had no concept of up until this year,
and watched the stop making sense.
I was like, okay, this is great.
This is really good.
It made me realize I knew a lot of talking head songs
that I didn't think I knew.
Yeah.
But David Boone, he's, I don't even know how old it comes.
It must be six, seven.
He's still got it.
He's still such an interesting performer,
and he had a song where it was,
I can't fucking, I need to find what the song is.
But he had a song that was like,
this used to be a 7-Eleven.
Now it's a colon field.
You got it.
You got it.
And the entire song is basically like,
after the apocalypse has happened,
but it's a beautiful thing.
Oh, nice.
I don't think I know that song.
It's a really interesting song.
And it's very catchy.
It's been in my head since.
And that's, sorry, that's what I,
the reason I was reminded of that
is survival with the boys, where you,
just the idea, like the picture that he paints
of like a Westfield covered in vines
and mousse running through it.
And you're like that?
I was like, it's a beautiful world.
That's a beautiful world.
For like an ATO to be like just Rex.
Yeah.
You know what I'm gonna do?
The department of transports just a crop now.
Like that's very, that's a wonderful thought.
That's essentially where we grow hydroponic strawberries.
And we grow that in these services
out of Wales building.
Yeah, it's like nothing will grow
because of the pure passive aggression,
the energy, the crops remember.
What are you doing today, man?
I'm filing the paperwork to filter out drinking water.
Yeah.
Some reason that still sticks around.
There's a woman covered in moss
who will call a number.
Yeah.
See, 21.
And it makes sense that she's a bitch in that context
because she's been covered in moss for a very long time.
Yeah, yeah, I'd be grouchy as well.
She's David Jones of the land.
Yeah.
She's gross.
But eventually if you keep going back
and off you get the right paperwork,
you do get drinking water.
But do your back, this is, I'm very jealous.
You're back in the monkey mind pocket
of having come from the blue mountains.
You've been in touch with nature, though.
Does it feel good?
Man, it, it, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
We stayed in this place.
I gotta, I gotta write it on Expedia.
It was, it was called the Haikuhat and went with falls.
So funny to have like a transformational, like,
nature experience.
I'm like, I need to give this place five stars.
I'm, I must, the second I get back to why, five stars.
I have, I'm completely, I've completely forgot.
I did, that's the point.
It's like I forgot to even check in
or say the state was good.
Cause I'm like, man, it was so good I forgot
that you even owned it.
Yeah.
But it like had a loft bed.
So we had, we had a staircase
that we had to pull down from the roof.
It had, it overlooked.
It wasn't like the greatest of views.
But if you weren't in the Blue Mountains,
you would have been like, wow.
And we watched a storm roll in on the Friday night.
We went for a, it is impossible.
All right, this is my hot take on the Blue Mountains, right?
So essentially all we did for four days
was get stoned and go bush walking.
And it was so calming and so nice.
And I have come back, we did so much fucking exercise.
But I just so refreshed.
My head was clear and new ideas for shit.
Great.
Blue Mountains is a stoners paradise
because it is impossible to get a bad pub feet.
Every pub we went to just had like really, really good shit.
Really, really good shit.
It is impossible to get bad food.
We weren't got country Chinese
and weren't worth falls, can't on palace, shout out.
Some of the best fried plum chicken I've ever had.
Love a country Chinese dude.
That's so sick.
Wrap your fucking shaft around this, right?
So we go and start my talent to somewhere else.
So we go in and I'm just expecting good country Chinese.
I didn't expect to have my mind blown.
We are the only ones in this restaurant,
but it could be full.
Like it's so warm in this music playing.
It's like nine degrees outside.
The guys weren't an added ass track.
So he's like, well, you won't, like I love this, this, this.
We ordered the pepper, beef, classic country Chinese,
and I got crispy plum chicken.
Crispy plum chicken comes out.
I'm like, what the fuck is this weird looking?
I asked him how I met it.
It's the best fried chicken I've ever had at a Chinese restaurant.
Because what they do is they keep the skin on the entire time
and then they batter the whole chicken
and then they put the batter onto the skin.
So the skin fries with the batter.
So it's just pure, unadulterated, fucking chicken.
It was so good.
The food was amazing.
You cannot get a good beer to save your fucking life.
At the pub.
No, no.
Every single beer that you get there,
you want to rushes,
or you're getting some blood orange,
deeper bullshit.
We went to mountain culture brewing.
Mm-hmm.
Those one, gabs, beer, pale ale of Australia
awards two years running for their pale ale.
It's the worst fucking shit I've had in my goddamn life.
It gave me diarrhea.
And then I go, well, I'll just get something else.
You don't think it was the double crunch plum chicken
that gave you double ribs?
That was two days later.
Okay.
No diarrhea, good quality chicken.
Okay.
And we were like, well, you know,
it's got a nice view.
It's a beautiful old building.
It's a nice brewery.
And every beer that just came out,
was like, I guess, well,
this is my impression of ordering a beer at mountain culture.
That one.
That's it.
I guess, I guess,
fuck, every single one of them was a weeper,
or a niper, or a 9% IPA,
or a fucked stout.
And the only thing that they had that wasn't that was a lie.
And it was one of the worst loggers ever had in my fucking life.
And we were just, we had three beers.
I was like, this place fucking sucks.
And then we just went down to the Old Bank Brown Abrocery
for dinner,
Katumba Brewing Company and English pale ale.
Lovely.
I'll grab one of them.
I gave it back.
Really?
I was like, this is the worst shit I've ever had in my life.
This was worse than the man culture stuff.
I know so better.
This is the issue about really getting into like,
the fact that you're into beer the way you are,
is that you can't enjoy the simple things anymore.
Ah, but that's the thing.
From that on, from that on, we were just like,
I just want to fucking rushes.
Just give me a fucking rushes.
Yeah, that's a simple beer.
But it's so cold up there that I do want something
that's just a little more heavier.
But everything that was heavier, fucking sucked.
And I cannot stress enough to Alex,
I know you're not,
I know you're not into beer the way I'm into it.
Yeah, like I couldn't give a fuck
about anything you're saying.
I had to tell you that.
You asked and I'm telling you.
Oh, I didn't ask about this specifically.
All right.
Should we move onto what you were talking about there?
No, just you brought it, you were like,
and the worst part of this beautiful weekend
the way that I had was this,
I couldn't find a decent weird beer that I like it.
I don't even want it.
They didn't have any of my city beers.
I didn't want a weird beer.
I just wanted a normal beer.
You rushes, that's a normal beer.
I know, I had to settle for a rushes,
which is a normal beer.
What's a normal beer to you?
Just give me a fucking, just give me an eye
all the taste like an ale.
We're in the mountains.
I just want an ale.
You want like a 50 lashes?
They didn't have James Squire or anything like that?
Didn't see him.
That is still a Queensland beer
and that's the harder new South Wales.
I didn't see any 50 lashes.
The point is, my point is this, right?
It's been so long since I've just been to like a brewery
and I got excited because I'm like, man,
mountain culture beer in cans tastes like fucking piss.
Maybe it's better at the source.
Right.
It's worse.
I was just, we got, me,
me, should I go really salty about it?
And this Katumba brewing English beer.
It was so bad that even if I blindfolded you
and I gave you that, I think you would have,
I'd be like, what is this?
You would have drunk and it'd be like,
I have no idea.
Did you put a frog in some cider?
Like it was so fucking bad.
It was barely beer and it was just,
and then I spent the whole night just having such bad acid
reflux, I was throwing up in my mouth.
It was so bad.
But the food, Alex, the food.
I mean, the food sounds amazing.
I do sort of want to get to the bottom of the beer thing
because I want the fuck, give me an intro point.
This is the thing.
I want to be, I want to empathize.
I really do.
But there's something about what,
because I think you,
I actually think you're being a bit of a,
know this respect, a little bit of a princess.
Now, can I be honest?
I'm aware of my princess line with beer.
That's the thing.
I'm aware of my princess line.
Because I've never seen in my life anyone return a beer.
Oh, the only time I,
most I've ever seen is someone on TikTok
in high viz returning because it's like,
my, where's the fucking head?
That's, that's when they return it.
And even then, I'm like,
brother, just drink the, but I get it.
Yeah, no, I tend to agree.
I tend to agree.
Unless you make me pay $18 for a Guinness
in the heads this much.
Yeah, right.
I agree.
And I don't tend to,
I can't really be bothered anyone to do that.
You said that a lot.
I don't do that anymore.
It feels odd.
This was, this was so bad I went,
hey man, I think this is at the bottom of the barrel.
Uh-huh.
And he goes, I tapped the hair 10 minutes ago.
I'm like, oh.
Well, maybe turn it upside down.
Yeah, yeah, brother.
It's easy thing.
I assumed because of the way it tasted.
It was a barrel and keg different thing with beer.
The kegs, it's good all the way through.
And so he tasted a little bit of it when it's fun.
I'm like, no, it's not.
It's the, no, I don't worry about it.
Like it was so bad.
I'm like, dude, I can't get a good beer to sell my beer.
You're giving us city boys a bad name in the country, dude.
They're shaking your head.
They're shaking their head at you.
You just see that's the, that's the opposite.
You got to go in there and be like, hmm.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, yeah, actually, but to be honest with you,
that wasn't my fault.
That was at the end of a full hiking day
where that was the Saturday and me,
and I had spent the morning just,
like just goblin edibles and walking and finding waterfalls.
And so when we walked in, we walked into the old bank
Brian and Brassery.
We hadn't made a booking.
Oh my goodness, you have anything available?
He goes, I have two tables I can throw on,
but they're going to fill up real quick.
So if you want them, grab them now.
And me, she goes, do you think they'll be here in 10 minutes?
And he goes, I don't know if you would like a table
I'd suggest you grab them now because, okay.
What if we come back in half an hour?
And he's like, let me just consult my crystal ball,
hold on to me one second.
And then he goes under the little foyer,
that's what he has, and he comes out
and he gives you the double birds.
And I'm like, I wanted to be like,
me, sure, that's not how it fucking works.
You're embarrassing me.
He's offering us a table.
We take it over there.
But I didn't, because we were just like,
come on, let's go through to the Carrington Hotel Gardens.
They're beautiful gardens.
We'll smoke a joint.
We'll come back.
We'll see what they've got.
I'm like, okay, done.
And so we don't go to the gardens.
We go to an unlit alleyway that stinks of piss.
I mean, these are lovely gardens.
She's like, yes, the gardens, they're over there.
I'm like, well, this isn't, this is an alleyway.
And then we go back in, and me and me
was like, do you have the table?
And he goes, I actually do have a table for you, yeah.
And we sit down, and it's just, it's so parked
and she goes, I am freaking the fuck out right now.
Way too high.
Oh, shit.
I'm like, oh, the one that wanted to join.
I was happy to sit down and get a table.
It's gonna be fine.
It's gonna be fine.
It's gonna be totally fine.
It's gonna be totally fine.
Oh my God.
And then eventually it was, it was fine
after about 20 minutes.
Dude, there is nothing, first off one,
being in an unfamiliar spot, already tough enough,
but being on the moon in an unfamiliar spot,
that's so scary.
Yeah, I guess.
I quite like it.
Yeah?
I quite like it, and I think my confidence with it, mate,
and I don't want to speak ill of my lovely lady.
My confidence with it, I think, gives me
a sense of confidence that she doesn't quite have.
Because then we go to these new places,
and she's like, I think I'm too high for this.
I'm like, I told you you might be too high for this,
and then you told me to not police you.
Yeah, nice.
And here we are.
That's awesome.
But it was, but yeah, man, it was like,
it was so, it was barely,
it was barely able to put on the radar, dude.
I know I've bitched about it for the last 15 minutes.
Yeah.
But it was just, it was.
It seems to be the main part of the holiday, honestly.
Dude, it was just all bush walks,
and it was just waterfalls,
and we saw some only fans influences,
getting their tits out on the trail.
Really?
Yes, they're all like standing on the trail doing this.
Oh, it's fun.
And then we walked down the trail, and they were,
and then I just got to watch two perfect butts,
walk up the rest of the trail until they ducked off
to like a hidden area.
Nice.
I know.
We know what you're doing, by the way, you sluts.
Yeah, we're fully aware.
We know what you're doing.
And then, and then we walked back, and we walked back,
and Misha was just like, you been quiet, buggy, you okay?
And I'm like, oh, yeah, I think for the last 15 minutes.
You know, call me buggy around the only fan's tricks,
but actually, can you walk five steps behind me right now,
actually?
I'm gonna pull my shoulders back a little.
I'm just like, what's it?
You've been quite quiet.
Yeah, I think just for the last 10 minutes,
I've just been fantasizing about what they're up to.
Yeah.
I've just been to be like, oh, I don't know what they're up to.
Would it be weird if we followed them up?
Do Misha and I go up together?
What if we watch from the bushes?
Well, what's the point if you can't check off?
Is that weird?
That's creepy.
But if we do it together, it's not cool.
It's not cool.
What if we introduce to ourselves?
I don't want to get it.
Getting better, getting warm up?
Yeah, I'm like, I don't want to be in a video.
I've seen Paul with Fat Guys, that's not for me.
Hahaha.
Oh my god.
I don't think that would come out very well.
And then I definitely doesn't come out good when the Fat Guys
and the bushes jacking off.
Next to a chick that's way too hard to be there.
Yeah.
And so Misha and I just walked and spoke
about the play-by-play-through of that
and what that scenario would play out as.
I think in hindsight, way too loudly, a bunch around
a bunch of tourists with kids.
Because we weren't so far gone that we couldn't engage
with everything, but there were.
You were in a bubble.
We were just in our little bubble.
And there were so many, dude.
Fucking, there were so many Germans.
Okay.
I don't know what's going on.
I guess that's, I mean, just not learning their lesson.
Yeah.
I guess, brother.
Just because the Wolf Creek movies have taken
a bit of a sabbatical, they get in confident.
You get a really confident.
We need a Wolf Creek movie and that'll lower immigration.
I think that's the thing.
In terms of backpack and confidence,
I think you could chart it based on when Wolf Creek has come out.
Yeah, true.
Because they were back being confident.
We need a Wolf Creek.
We need John Jarrett back in the saddle.
Yeah, we do.
God bless him.
But yeah, man, it was just, it was just a really nice trip.
Went to some beautiful old pubs.
Wait, how did it end?
The conversation of like the, how do we approach this?
We both agreed that if we were both in the bush,
jacking off, even if we were both doing it,
it would still be creepy if not doubly creepy.
And then it would be weird to then impose ourselves
on whatever they're doing.
Because it would just be pervy.
And despite the fact that what would be really funny
is sharing out, I know what you guys are doing up there.
That's fun.
Which would be fun.
But then also like, we then started getting really confused
about, okay, so these two girls in what
could barely be called active wear.
Like you're picking to do this on a Saturday at lunchtime.
Like it's full.
There's so many people in this area.
It's just a weird time to pick to do this.
But it also just could be that.
Also just could be pure blue mountains of brain.
Like true.
Yeah, we have, this is where weird people come.
Yeah, the now salons closed on Saturday,
so it's on the time to get off.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, I think there is something nice about being like,
hey, me and my partner, we notice that you guys
are doing only fans.
And we don't want to be a part of it.
But if you don't mind, we both would like to jack off
from the bushes if that's okay.
I think they would be like, man, yeah, maybe.
Who were you hurting?
Yeah, what's really coming?
Yeah, what are you guys saying?
Genuinely, who am I hurting by doing that?
Sharks.
Have a pitch.
We're going to jack off in the bushes.
Well, you do what you're going to do.
And yeah, I think we can come to some arrangement here.
What do you say?
Yeah, we went to a bunch of antique shops.
Oh, dude, I don't know what's going on in the blue mountains
at the moment.
There are so many weapons for sale.
Swords, axes, maces, helmets, shields.
We went to this one, I like, D&D antique house with a baby.
And this one came in.
Sorry, we came in and this woman's sitting there.
And this house, it was beautiful in its own way,
but it was 90% just shit.
Mom.
And then...
As are most antique shops.
Like when you go to any of those small town,
like little Nicknack stores,
and everyone, like, take a look at my way,
it's me like, all of this shit is useless.
I can't believe that you've dedicated your life.
It's sweet.
Yeah, sweet.
But oh, man, if I was your parents, I'd have woods.
Oh, yeah.
This is crazy.
You thought you would get a buy off,
but the fuck I didn't do that.
I don't love it, of course we go.
But the dude in Adelaide that had the,
just specifically, Serbia store in the German street in Adelaide,
it's like, I'm your only business.
And I've never been here before.
He was so excited to see me, he closed the shop
and he was like, you're on Djokovic here?
And I was like, oh, look, can we look at the Djokovic here?
And every size was a different graphic.
Oh, yeah, great.
I was like, do you have this in the large?
And he's like, nah, the largest are all this graphic.
Yeah.
No other business works like that.
Yes.
Yeah, and you have a very niche market.
Yeah, in Adelaide of all places in a German.
Yeah.
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Yeah, man, we walked into this place.
There were like 1950s, empty, dirty Pepsi bottles
for like 70 bucks.
I don't know, I'm a fucking biker.
There was a far-side cartoon book.
And I love the far side.
And I don't have a far-side cartoon book.
I got Calvin Hobbs, I got Phantom,
I got a bunch of the ones that I grew up with.
And I was like, oh my God, that's a fucking 38 bucks.
It's like, fuck you, that's a $5 book.
Yeah, man.
I don't even see them.
I was like, oh my God.
I was going to say the only thing I wanted
was sitting at the back is the creepiest fucking shit
was a genuine turn of the century,
really good condition ventriloquist doll.
Creepiest fuck with the jaw and the painted on eyes
and the weird smile.
And I just saw, I'm like, oh my God, I want that so much.
I want that so much.
I want that so much.
$1,300.
Damn.
I really thought it would have been like,
you don't pay in a money situation.
I thought it would have been like, yes, it's for free,
but you pay in other ways.
Yeah, like I would have dealt with that curse.
Yeah.
Really, you want that in your house?
I would have taken the risk.
I would have taken the risk.
Oh, someone who's been haunted before.
I might have kept it in my car.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
The place where you're most likely to get into a collision.
I just, yeah, yeah.
And day one like easy mode for a curse.
Yeah, true, yeah, it's fair point.
And then she had an armory.
She had a full armory.
Battle Axis, swords, helmets, shields.
And she just had like a two month old baby.
And she was like 55.
It was all just kind of odd.
And I think we interrupted her breastfeeding.
It was just like, nice.
It was just weird.
No one that had two was out recently.
That's great.
Yeah.
I don't know if I filled that way about about a woman
over 55 still capable of breastfeeding.
It was just all a little unsettling.
Sure.
And then she comes in as we're looking at all the like the swords
and shit.
And Misha and I are just midriff, having a nice time.
She goes like anything in particular.
And I was like, yeah, yeah, man.
This is just a really interesting collection.
She's like, people come through here.
You know, this is just stuff we've accumulated.
I'm like, look, okay, I'm looking at this Battle Axe.
What would you personally recommend
if I am trying to get an invoice paid by a sports bar in Cramon?
And Misha laughs and she goes, the Battle Axe.
The high ace.
Yeah.
The Battle Axe, because he had 600 bucks.
My God.
I'm applying King to come to.
I'm pretty sure I know how to forge my own.
Yeah.
600 bucks, you fucking out of your mind.
Yeah, man.
Well, this is the thing.
That's actually, if you told the peasant,
it's only $600, they'd probably be like, that's a steal.
If you told him that evil peasant,
they would be like, that's a steal for a Battle Axe.
Like a nicely forged Battle Axe.
Surely back in the day, that was the most inaccessible thing.
Yeah, well, I know, not really.
Very exciting.
You're Iron.
You're Iron.
I feel like that would have been very expensive.
Like a massive thorned Battle Axe.
That's cool.
Yeah, a thorned Battle Axe, short with like,
really nice steel, 100%.
But you just go to the backsmith and ask for a Battle Axe.
He sharpens the fuck out of it.
He'd probably pay fucking six coins for it.
You think so?
Yeah, he had huge four coins.
Six general medieval coins.
Six general medieval coins.
Clean, clean, clean, clean, clean.
There you go.
Very good sign.
And one of the big major highlights is any country town.
I find a sweet old deer who's selling fudge.
Oh, brother, can I be real?
I hate the fudge places.
Oh, you're out of your mind.
The fudge places aren't.
I go, look, it's good, whatever, fine.
But you're out of your mind.
If you think I'm paying $9 for a bit of fucking fudge,
that's what it always comes down to where I'm like,
first off, this is way too rich every single time.
I get it's fudge.
But like a country, I'm like, I'll tell you what it is.
Why do you all have a fudge place?
I think that's what it is.
I can tell you.
Every time I go, I'm like, why don't,
another dessert would be nice every now and again.
I can tell you what's the,
there's a real reason behind everyone has a fudge place.
Yeah, everywhere.
No, no, it's why country towns have fudge places.
Because all of the ingredients are cheap
and it's easy to make.
And you don't need ovens and it's high margin.
Yeah.
And it's relatively low effort.
So, yeah, I think you can taste that
in every part of the experience with fudge places.
I completely disagree with you.
Commercial fudge, a thousand percent.
I need to taste the love and the sweet old deer
with the dicky hip who took 15 minutes
to get me four pieces of fudge.
I took one bite of that and it's like I would have waited 40.
Really?
It was great.
We ate the whole thing that night.
The one person has a favorable memory
of you in the blue mountains.
Yeah.
The one person.
The fudge chick.
Yep.
I hope someone fire bombs her place.
We went back on Monday.
We went back on Monday and we bought more fudge.
Well, it was so fucking, I love fudge, dude.
I'd like my favorite thing in the whole.
It's like a country fudge made by a sweet old woman.
Oh, caramel, pecan butter, vanilla, no chocolate,
fuck chocolate, chocolate fudge is bullshit.
Just what?
What's your problem?
At this point, the podcast is just you
naming flavors of fudge.
I can't, I can't fathom how shit this is to listen to.
I like my fudge.
Fudge is a top tea, a peasant dessert.
I think it's insane.
It's not a peasant dessert anymore, brother.
They're expensive.
They're a little expensive, but at the same time,
it was, it worked out to be $6 for a...
No, no people in, like, send the link ads
have all the envelopes on the table.
Can barely afford to get my kids' fudge.
Well, that's the thing.
You can now, because fudge has been co-opted.
So you can get a chocolate fudge sundae from McDonald's,
but that's not proper fudge.
Proper fudge is heavy, it's dense.
This is Derek.
He hasn't tasted fudge since 2014.
And then, like, the kids are, like, sad.
He's like, sorry, I think he's giving them, like,
my low cookies.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I just want to provide for my family, the amount of fudge
that my father provided for me.
For $47 a day, you can support Derek getting fudge
for just himself.
No, it's like a crazy huge highlight of mine.
I loved it.
I don't want that yucky, y'all.
I'm that sweet.
I'm glad that you had a nice time.
And also, this is how good the fudge was.
Michelle had that opinion before she tasted this fudge.
And she was like, holy shit.
I'm like, yeah, country fudge, man, it's the best.
It's so good, dude.
Oh, it's so much.
Sure, it was being sold out of the back of a habidashary.
Yeah, yeah.
But it was beautiful.
Please, for the love of God,
someone run this fudge stand for this poor woman,
the arthritis on her hands.
She can't cut it.
I'll tell you the number one spot with all country places.
And I can't see you disagreeing with this.
But the number one spot to it is the meat pie joint.
Wherever, if you go to a country place and go
the number one meat pie that you can get in fucking
wherever you are, that's always the best shit.
Yep, you don't think so?
No, I grew through entirely.
I'm just having a moment of regret
because I wanted to go to a place called the pie hut.
It had like 4.8 stars.
It served it with mushy peas and mashed potato and crazy.
Yeah, you got to go to the pie hut.
And I was voted down.
I was voted down for going to the pie place.
I voted down. It was just YouTube.
Yeah, I know.
But Mish was like, I don't really want that for breakfast.
So I'm like, well, that's the breakfast option today.
This is what it's a holiday.
Yeah, I know.
I wanted a really nice country pie.
A country pie is the go.
I didn't get.
I got a pie at the old bank Brian Brasser,
but it was really whatever.
I know it was good.
I just expected more from a country pie.
It's a country pie.
This is the thing.
They're all sort of whatever.
Like, you go there because you're like,
I'll tell you what, you go there most of the time
because they're relatively cheap.
And they make them there.
Yeah, that's kind of it.
But when it's like, it's the best pie you'll get
for fucking kilometers.
And you're like, yeah, yeah.
But it's not that much better than like a 7-Eleven pie.
It's slightly better.
Oh, it's slightly better.
No, it's not better.
And because I believe in the Australian economy,
I am here and not there.
I'll die before I give another cent of the Japanese.
I'm a country boy now.
It is funny for pie places to be,
to be like the best pie for miles, mate.
It's like, you are the only pie shop for miles.
Yeah.
It's like the place from Brisbane to Sydney
where it's like the best cherry pie on this side
of the equator.
Oh, I bet, Cunt.
You have why you're like, it's in like,
it's keeping in the glosh, in the glass glosh.
It's like, you didn't even make this turn.
They're like, yeah, but what are you gonna do about it?
What are you gonna do?
That's really at the end of the day.
You're already here, Cunt.
Get a cherry pie.
That should be on the side.
You're already here, Cunt.
Get a cherry pie.
Dude, that building.
Last time Mum and I drove back to Brisbane years ago now,
we drove past that place and I was like,
I've always wanted to pop in there.
She went, oh, you're popped in there.
That pie was shit.
It was really bad.
You're like, you want an ice cream with it
and you're like, what is it like a homemade?
And they go, and they just take like someone's
spits on an ice cream scoop.
And then just, it's not even ice cream.
It's like vanilla dessert.
Yeah.
Vanilla frozen dessert from Aldi.
Plop it on cardboard.
So it soaps through.
Yeah.
There you go, Cunt.
Enjoy that, mate.
Who's going to believe you?
That'll be $14.
And an extra 83 for the petrol.
Dude, fuck that place.
Yeah, yeah, it's so, it's so gosh.
This is the thing, if it was good, it would be in a city.
Let's just be real.
Like, Eljana was so good, it went from Western Sydney
to now, it's a franchise.
If it was good, it would be in the city,
your best cherry pie, but maybe your cherry pie
just ain't that good.
If the only place you can afford to make rent
is in no man's land between New South Wales and Queensland.
Yeah, and also, not for nothing,
at an intersection in a highway
with really high volume traffic
between three petrol stations.
Yeah, dude.
The fact that you have outdoor dining
at this cherry pie place is, oh yeah, great.
I love to eat a cardboard pie, stinging of diesel.
Yeah, man.
Yeah, yeah.
But the fudge, brother.
Fuck, fuck, fuck, you, let's end this shit.
50, should we call it?
Yeah, we can, but just really quickly,
you really think, you've known me for so long now,
you really don't think my highlights and lowlights
wouldn't be all food based.
No, no, it's just, it's not even that.
It's not even the fact that I don't think that it's just,
I've known you for long enough now
that I've realized there were no surprises left with you.
Oh, okay.
I think what you're feeling is the disappointment
and how predictable you've become.
Right.
Okay, sure.
Anyway.
So I had, I'd say something back,
but I'm sure I'd hear about it in three days.
Sure, somehow you tunnel it into some sort of version
of disrespect.
It's not this respect.
Look, brother, this is a point in the relationship
where it gets a little blamed.
That's all, man.
We've all experienced this.
Look, it's not my fault.
You think you're better than fudge.
That's not my fault.
You're working on your fucking high horse.
God forbid, I say one thing.
I can't say one thing.
God forbid Alex acknowledges that the one thing
came up to 19 other things, all in the same thing.
Sorry, brother, I was just trying to find the way
the riff was, and he all ended up at,
yeah, this kind of food, that was good.
And the bushwalks, the bushwalks are nice.
Yeah, that was, we stayed on that for like 40, so that it's,
oh, I forgot about this other food.
It's still the blue mountains.
I'm not like, dude, have you been to the rollercoaster
in Katumba?
Why do you think it was going to fucking happen?
Oh, at this point, we're 52 minutes.
And this is tie-toe, it's been like, fuck.
And this other thing I ate.
This is just, it's been the most sand bowed
and the sand bowed and you can do.
We had a nice time, I don't want to tell you.
We chilled out in the bush.
Yeah, I thought it was funny.
The local Katumba RSL was doing a K-pop demon
hunter's dance along with me.
There we go.
I wanted to fuck me.
Sorry, that's not all you immediately going to.
Well, yeah, I didn't want to.
People line dancing to K-pop demon hunter,
so you're trying to figure out how to make the nut bush
work to K-pop the, are you fucking crazy?
The riff is right there.
And we've been talking about fudge.
You dickhead.
That's how good the fudge was, brother.
It was my fucking brain, remember the else?
You're a fucking skunk.
The RSL, why were there at the time was doing a K-pop demon hunter
dance along?
Could you imagine, could you imagine?
Oh, something for the grandkids and something
for the grand parents, remember?
No, I believe.
Yeah, we're fucking welcome.
We're comparing our former selves.
I like the fudge.
I know you.
I know you, I know you.
I know you.
Just every one I've fucking told is at the exact same reaction.
That's what it is.
That's what I'm reading.
Yeah, it's not me.
You're talking to a line of people
as equally disinterested as I was.
Ned had the same reaction.
Michelle had the same reaction until she had the fudge.
Yeah.
And I bought more fudge to give to Seth
because Seth looked after Bugle.
And I gave him the fudge.
I thought you some country fudge was like, ah, cool.
I'm like, yeah, because most people
have the exact same experience with fudge,
which is like, I guess we'll go here
because there's nothing else to do in this place.
You're out of your goddamn life.
Yeah, we'll end this.
The numbers are with me.
The numbers are with me.
Yeah, you wait, mate.
It'll be like everything else in my fucking life
within six to eight months.
Oh, everyone's gonna be about fudge.
But I'm just gonna make it.
You're gonna be fucking come back.
I won't be able to turn the corner without someone
trying to get fudge going.
This is gonna be a revival of Guinness all over again.
You fucking wait.
Brother, I am so sick of being ahead of the curb
all the time and getting no acknowledgement for it.
Brother, first off, I maintain
that Guinness is a bullshit beer
and is more than anything a product of trendy.
And you know what?
I agree with you.
I maintain.
However, it got trendy after I started drinking it.
Yeah, but you didn't make it.
It would just happen to happen at the same time.
Didn't I, Alex?
You were doing a lot of grassroots legwork for it.
Everyone else would get a normal beer or something like that.
And you'd be like, actually, you know, Guinness,
you were doing a lot.
It was very great.
I just started getting a craving for it.
And then it became popular again.
And you know, it's been like crazy
and popular since the 1800s.
But it's sort of just, it had a huge culture.
Yeah, you really picked an underdog of a horse.
Yeah, what can I say to you about where you, yeah.
What an angel.
Do you want to add another animal to that?
I don't know what you.
Yeah, another dog of a horse.
You fucking pig.
I grew up in such a cat.
I just don't know, look, this is the thing.
The people on my side with you are this one.
And it came from a pure, this is the thing.
It came from the purest intention.
I've been like Sam has had, obviously,
had a transcendental experience with this fudge.
He's had a lot of ups and downs with the food
and drink in the blue mountains.
Yes, that is one thing.
Yes, now where is the fun in this?
Because at the end of the day,
still got microphones on.
And I was really trying hard and the further I looked,
the more frustrated I became.
And then that just turned into pure anger.
Because you started making me feel dumb.
Because every door I fucking tried to open was locked.
I apologize, man, I was on the fudge train.
We haven't even gotten to how good this pecan butter fudge was.
And this is the fuck thing.
It's funny now, but it's only funny
if you listen to the first 40 minutes of bullshit.
Oh.
There was a guy with a lazy eye at one of the dinos.
Yeah, there you go.
Man, it was so good.
I had all these new ideas came back fresh, man.
Just riding down being like lazy.
I got something lazy.
I all trans women work at country.
Upshops in the country.
Oh, yeah, that was one thing I noticed.
That's one thing I noticed is that there were,
there were, there were plenty of transit on binary people
in September.
I mean, blue mountains are a very left leaning.
Oh, yeah, it's an odd combination.
I was like, you, you think it's country, but it's suit.
You go up there and it's like, it's like communes and shit.
Yeah, it's a hippie paradigm.
Yeah, it's a stone is paradise.
That's why we never really got self-conscious about smoking weed.
Sure, because like, yeah, we're both wearing ponchos.
Yeah, this is the place where you do this.
Yeah.
And every, every single upshot by one,
and we went into like seven fucking six foot three woman.
Nice.
Working behind the counter.
Really bad attitude.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Good.
Taking the full role responsibly.
What was it like a new town trans?
Was it, is a country trans a different country trans?
So, okay, so this is the way I felt about it.
Is it?
Because I've seen a country trans and it was,
tam with, I saw a trans and tam with.
Yeah.
And it was interesting.
It was more androgynous than I expected.
Yeah, that's the vibe I got, is that the people that I,
I'm pretty confident were trans people in the upshops.
It was like, there was a level of commitment to it,
which I think you probably have to have in the country.
I have to be like, I am making sure that if you misgender me,
you know you're doing it intentionally.
Yep.
But I will say this, the non-binaries.
Hot non-binaries.
Hot non-binaries.
In the country.
Hot non-binar is in the country, man.
Nice.
Yeah, oh yeah, dude.
I guess, because you've been to Lura.
Yeah.
So you've got all the nice skin care,
like all the brands and there's a witchery there
and whatnot and all that shit.
And so yeah, we were just, when we bought these shirts
at the Angle Care Upshop, there was just this person
who, I'm so confident, born female of birth.
But just, me and I were both like,
I can't talk to this person.
Too hot, too hot, too friendly, too born.
All smile, a little bit sassy.
Nice.
We were trying to make each other laugh.
And we were just like, okay, we're going to go now.
We both walked out and was like,
which is that way?
And Mish was like, yeah, that was hot.
That was hot.
They were really hot.
That was awesome.
That was awesome.
They were really hot.
That's actually very encouraging to hear.
Yeah, oh yeah.
And it kind of makes sense a little bit.
You know what I mean?
It's like, if you were that like anti-capitalist,
which you know what I mean,
it's like that comes with the territory.
Yeah, of course.
Yeah, you would add out to where the hippie shit is.
Yeah, that makes sense.
If your parents took a bunch of mushrooms
and then conceived,
you're going to come out with a complete deconstruction
of gender.
For sure.
You're a two-spirit from day one.
Straight out the gate.
That's nice.
Yeah.
That's nice.
That's very hardening to hear honestly.
And also a good kind of nice sort of alternate to Bali.
You know what I mean?
A good old man sort of like, can you not afford Thailand?
But you're still just like, you still feel like a dog
scratching at the door in your brain?
Yeah.
The blue mountains.
The blue mountains, I think, is a good spot for them.
Where's some short shorts and experiments?
Yeah, because the Thai, this is the thing.
The Thailand thing is a bit rundown of it.
Like we talked about it where it starts to get a little bit like,
you tell someone, hey, man, I'm going to Thailand.
You're like, you're perfect.
But someone goes, hey, I met my wife in the blue mountains.
You go, what a progressive.
Yeah.
What an interesting.
I see his couple that peg.
Yeah, clearly.
That's good.
They're just smoking weed, hanging out,
going to the op shop,
and just trying to pick up the non-binary lady.
How do you say it?
It's not my, it's a non-binary NB.
NB?
It is funny.
It is funny because your ears is the non-binary chick.
Yeah.
And it's so nuts, we're like, well, that's not correct.
But that does paint the picture.
We're like, yes, the non-binary.
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You know a non-binary dude in a non-binary chick?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, that's not fair.
That's not fair.
Obviously not joking, that's not fair.
But if you're around, if you're around the place
selling vases, you're a non-binary chick.
Yes, 100%.
That's the thing.
If you're at a mechanics, you're a non-binary dude.
Non-binadio.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Well, my pro-nayners, they then,
but enough about how I alternate.
Let's talk about your alternator.
There you go, that's pretty okay.
There we go. There we go.
I'm sorry, man, I'm really rich.
Yeah, me too. Me too, man.
I'm zonked.
But we'll be, have more angios.
Small claims caught at the Sydney comedy festival
on the third and the second and the third.
Second and the third of May,
tickets are at the link in our buyers
at the Sydney comedy festival website.
I will also be shortly announcing
a solo show in Brisbane at the end of May.
And also tonight,
Mosh Pit faking clever.
Yeah.
Fucking come through, lads.
So you with the pit band started 8 p.m.,
Mosh Pit's on King Street, Newtown, they fucking rule.
I hope they'll kind of like spin kick music
because I'm ready to fucking take some concept.
I feel like it's spin kick music with a big old smile.
All right, well, fuck you, much love.
Sweet, see you gang, bye, bye, bye, bye.
