If you’re the owner of a cat, then you’ll undoubtedly be aware that its life is governed by a strict set of rules that you’ve established for it. Wait, no — that’s for a dog. Let’s try again: if you have a cat, then YOUR life is governed by a strict set of laws that it’s established for you. Here's a collection of the closely guarded secret rules to help you establish good relations with your cat.
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TIMESTAMPS:
The law of feline magnetism 0:13
The law of sleeping beside a cat 0:35
The law of the misshapen rug 0:55
The law of observing the refrigerator 1:22
The law of feline resistance 1:48
The law on cleanliness 2:09
The law of endless milk consumption 2:36
The law on defining value 3:09
The law of feline inertia 3:42
The law of feline extension 4:17
The law of feline agility 4:52
The law on moving house 5:19
The law on feline curiosity 5:55
The law of feline physics 5:23
The law of the feline gaze 7:02
SUMMARY:
Cat fur is attracted only to things of a contrasting color, regardless of the color of the cat.
Cats must sleep in their owners’ beds as often as possible, preferably in a pose that’s comfortable for them and not for anyone else.
No rug can remain in its original flat state for any lengthy period of time.
If a cat stares intently at the refrigerator for long enough, someone will come and provide something tasty from it for the cat (and for no one else).
The resistance shown by a cat is directly proportional to the desire of their owner to force them to do something.
The desire to get dirty appears straight after being cleaned.
A cat can drink any quantity of milk, even if that quantity is several times larger than the volume of the cat itself.
The desire of a cat to scratch furniture is directly proportional to the furniture’s value.
A cat will remain in its desired state of rest until it decides otherwise, regardless of the laws of physics.
A cat’s body stretches at a rate directly proportional to the time it spends asleep.
Given the right amount of time, a cat will be able to reach any area of your home that attracts its interest.
The likelihood of an empty box soon being occupied by a cat when moving house is approximately 100%.
A cat’s interest is indirectly proportional to the amount of effort a person puts into attracting its attention.
The possibility of being made to take any kind of medicine is sufficient to provide a cat with enough energy to overcome the known laws of physics and carry out teleportation.
A cat can induce feelings of guilt in others with a single stare. Even when the cat itself is at fault. In fact, especially when the cat itself is at fault.
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