Vision Without Action Is Just Talk

vision. You got to have vision as a leader, especially the leader in your business,

leader in the household. You know, the Bible tells you where the, the people parish where

there is no vision. And it's like, if I'm not constantly telling my team and my family

and my wife, like what's happening and where we're going, people kind of want to start

wondering what's like next, you know, or we just like kind of headed towards the end. You

know, is there any growth opportunities for anyone here? Because I don't think anyone

wants to look at their marriage and be like, this is the peak. Yeah. You know, it's only

downhill from here. It's like, no, like our vision for our marriage should be just always

increasing. Yeah. I think on the other side, I think sometimes people are trying to sell

their spouse on a vision too hard when they need to just do the work. Yeah. They'll come,

I was going to say the B word, but they'll complain and moan about their wives or husbands

not believing in them when they actually haven't done anything yet. So I think if you're going to

have a vision, tell them, but follow it up with action. Yeah. Don't tell them. And then next week,

tell them a new vision, the next week tell them the new vision and next week tell them the new

vision with no follow up to what you're telling people. Yeah. Or it's the same vision, but there's

no actions. Yeah. You know, whatever. That's actually a good point. I remember at our events,

Mindy and I will do sit downs, whether it's like tent makers event or like WealthCon or whatever.

And we'll tell the story about how, you know, when we first took the big risk to start flipping

houses, you know, I maxed out all of our credit cards for $50,000. And you know, I remember going

to tell her, I go, Hey, you know, I got this big revelation, you know, from God, we're going to

flip houses. And she was like, Okay, and then I told her what needed to happen to do that. Like,

okay, so we're going to need to like, you know, max out our credit cards and all this stuff.

I need your social. And, you know, obviously we did it and it worked out and people are like,

so like, are you scared? How did it happen? You know, what were you feeling? And she said this

before she goes, Well, at that point, Ryan had already proven himself that when he said he was

going to do something, he was going to do it. You know, like I watched him say, Hey, I'm going

to be a professional athlete and go and be a professional athlete. I watched him say, Hey, I'm

going to go flip these couches and make money. And he goes and flips these couches and makes money.

So by the time you said, Hey, I'm going to go do these flip these houses and we're going to have

to take this risk, but it's going to be worth it. Like I believed he was going to do what he said.

And yeah, I think to your point, there's a lot of people who talk a big game, but never walk the

talk. Exactly. Yeah, now and it's like, Well, yeah, I wouldn't believe you either. And so I tell

him that at these Christian at our tent maker events, I'm like, Yeah, why would she believe you?

What track record do you have that, you know, where you've even tried to make your dream happen?

It's one thing for your dream to fail. I don't think there's anything wrong with somebody having

a big dream, trying and failing. Yeah. And I don't think a spouse should, if that has happened,

and you're a spouse and you're constantly telling your husband, Oh, remember that time you failed?

And you know, is it going to be just like that? It's like, you have to as a as a life encourage him

to go out and do these things because if he doesn't and your life already sucks, it's not where

you guys want it to be. He's never going to even you're going to kill all the vision he has to

even go out and create. Yeah. And so if your husband, you already tried and failed at something,

I respect that more than the husband who talks a big game and don't even give it a shot. Yeah.

Another thing that I don't like or respect is when men are like, well, you know, she doesn't even

support me in my dreams. It's like, dude, it's. Oh, well, don't blame your, I hate when people

try to blame their wives and kids, why they're not successful. Yeah. So, well, I have three kids,

and my wife doesn't support me. That's why I haven't been able to make it work. It's like, bro,

that's such a weak ASS move to blame your wife and kids on why you're not successful. Yeah,

that's that's where there's no strength. It's like, hey, you tell your wife what you're going to do

and then go do it. Yeah. If she encourages you, that's great. But your success is not determined by

if she encourages you or not. Yeah. So don't try to blame your wife just because you haven't

been able to make things work. And they try to take it out on their wives or their partners or

whatever the case may be. And it's like, bro, like I told, when I started real estate, I told my mom,

I wasn't married yet. I told my mom, hey, mom, I'm going to get into real estate, blah, blah, blah, blah.

She's like, oh, like in 2008, there was this big market crash and my realtor lost his house.

Like, this is a bad idea. I was like, okay, thanks, mom. And then I went and did it anyways. Yeah.

Like, don't blame your and then once you have success, then they will encourage you or another

thing I used to do with Jessica, actually, when I was a realtor, I would incentivize her. I would

say, hey, babe, if you send me a client and I close on the house, I'll buy you a bag. And she would

send me clients because she was like involved. I have sold like a bunch, a bunch of the first homes

I sold in California were all just her friends because she would be like, oh, my husband's a realtor.

Oh, like, you know, she wanted the bag, but also I included her in what I was trying to do. And

then there's other times where Jessica did not want to be included. I was flipping my first house

in Chino. I was like, babe, I'll let you pick the paint. You could do the interior design.

She didn't want to do it. And I was like, okay, well, I'll do it. Yeah. I'm not going to blame her

for not wanting to be involved in my business. I just went and handled it. Yeah. Yeah. A lot of

guys just can't make excuses. That's just what it comes down to. Yeah. It just can't make it. And

that actually brings me up to the next one to bring up is being a provider. Yeah. And I mean,

look, we're talking about having servants, hearts and strength and patience and all these things.

But at the end of the day, you kind of put out numbers. Like, you got to just perform and go out

there and provide and do what it takes. Ideas are great. Vision is great. Like every great,

you know, thing starts with a vision. But now you got to just go out and execute. And so,

I just tell the guys, I'm like, okay, this is, you got a great plan. You want a wholesale. You want

to do this thing. Awesome. Let's start right now. But what can we do to start right now? Oh, well,

I'll do it next week. No, no, no, no, no. What are you going to do right now to start? Let's do this

right the second. Let's sign up for the thing. Let's get going on something. Whatever that looks

like. Because I got to see tangible proof that you're going to actually go perform for me to

believe you. Yeah. Yeah, I think, you know, with marriages, we're old school, we're like the men

provides. I know there's, there's like a new school where the women also provide or like,

it's 50, 50. Like when you first started taking Mindy out on dates, would you guys put the bill?

We never once put a bill. I swear. I know. But that's kind of like a thing now where I'm also not a

loser. Yeah, that's, that's a thing now where I get it. Yeah, you're a loser. I know. Yeah, not me.

I've always paid my bill. I have always paid my, but I'm saying, but the new age, like the 20-year-olds

nowadays, they split the bill. Well, it's why they're, I was going to call them something else.

But I think, you know, men, you need to provide for your wives like, yeah, period. Yeah.

If they're in financial stress because they're grinding it out because you're not doing enough,

that's a problem. Yeah. You know, it's this interesting thing because people are getting married

later. And so when you get married later, you meet career women because they've had to work.

Yeah. They don't have a husband. And so I do find that there are marriages that are harder

in that standpoint because the woman does want to work. She doesn't know any other way to live.

Yeah. There's nothing wrong with women working. Yeah. So, you know, you get women who want to work,

and then, you know, men who want to work too, obviously. And then it starts to become more of a problem

once you have kids. Because then it's like, all right, who's going to sacrifice, you know, to take

care of the kids and everything else. And in most cases, the men are the ones who end up being the

provider. And, you know, I just think biologically, that's how it's built. Like men aren't built to take

care of kids and be stay at home dads. I know there are some guys that make it work, but

I don't think you can argue biologically or biblically or anything that that was ever meant to be the

thing. Yeah. And just providing doesn't mean like all the woman can't work or can't make money. It's

just you are the one in charge and making sure that the financial health of your family is good.

Well, it goes back to vision, right? Hey, what's the vision for our family?

What kind of life we going to live? What kind of vacations we going on? What kind of house we're

going to live in or what are we going to do? Right? And so the vision only goes far as you want it to

go. And so if my vision for my life, and I told many of this a long time ago, even when we didn't

have money, it's like, yeah, our vision is that, well, and I told my vision before we got married,

I go, my vision is I want to have kids one day. I don't want to have them right now, but I'm

I'm looking for a wife wants to stay at home and be a mom and take care of the kids and I'll

I'll go make a bunch of money. I have no idea how it's going to happen. You know, at that time,

I thought it was going to be baseball, but that's what I'm looking for. What are you looking for?

And you know, we had those conversations before we got married and she's like, yeah,

like I could totally see myself doing that, you know, if that happens. Yeah. And she was a

teacher before we had kids. So she was doing teaching and I was just, you know, doing all my

hustles, figuring it out. And then eventually, once we had kids, she quit teaching and she embraced

that role and she loves it now. But I will say a lot of people just don't even have those conversations.

You know, I dude, I had the funniest guest. You guys can watch this episode, Brian with Action

Academy. And we were just talking about this concept. And he's like, I can't find the right

woman. Like, you know, I want somebody who can like match my hustle and, you know, do these things.

And, you know, but also it's like going to be great mom and stay at home and all these things.

Like you just described two completely different women, dude. Yeah. He's like, what do you mean? I

go, why would the woman who's like wants to hustle and have a career and match you also be the same

woman that wants to throw all that away and just be a stay at home mom and take care of again.

That's why you don't have life. You're describing two different women. Yeah. You know, you can have

polygamy and have that. But like, I don't think you're going to find it in one. I think, so I usually

sell young guys that I talk to. There's like three types of wives. So you have the player wife.

So that means this is a great analogy. So that's the you're playing, you're out playing a game

and she's in the game with you playing. Okay. So you're playing basketball. She's out there trying

to score, trying to rebound, trying to play the game with you. Then you have the cheerleader wife

where she's not in the game, but she's supporting. She's cheering you on. She's doing other things

in the background to support you. Then you have the in the parking lot wife, which she's there

with the car ready. She has no idea what's going on, but she's just doing her role of like taking

you to the game and then taking you home. So I believe most girls or women or husbands fall into one

of those buckets where sometimes like my wife has no idea what's going on my business. She doesn't

know what wholesaling is still. We've been married for like 10 years. Like if I were to ask what

is wholesaling? She has no idea. Like literally has no idea. But you know, she maintains everything

at home where I don't have to I haven't watched my clothes in 10 years. Yeah. I haven't folded a shirt

and eat bro like a decade. Yeah. It's crazy. Yeah. That's fine. So she's like the

in the car getting ready to take his home wife. Okay. And that's okay. I don't want a wife that's

like trying to come up with business ideas and trying to, you know, try to make decisions. I don't

need someone like, Hey, you know, in the office checking on people and crap like that. I don't need that.

No. I don't want that either.