Why Is Talking About Money Harder Than Talking About Sex?!

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Hey, I do part two. It's your host, Cheryl Burke.

And I'm joined by one of my favorite chapter 2000.

It's Joan Vassos from the Golden Bachelorette.

Hey, Joan.

Hi, how are you?

It's been a long time.

Great. I spent a while.

I've been following you on Instagram.

So I know every single thing about your life.

I'm a total fan for all to be honest.

Exactly.

Today, we're talking about one of the hardest topics in any relationship.

And no, it's not sex.

Unfortunately, we're talking money.

Our guest today is the host of the financial tea podcast and her new book,

Future Rich Person, The New Rules for Building Wealth.

Even if you're stuck, broke, and that billionaire won't text you back.

Is out May 12th.

That's a long title, but means so much.

Please welcome Hailey Sacks, AK Mrs. Dow Jones.

Okay, so tell us about your financial literacy.

Did you, were you raised by parents who were really good, you know,

investing their money?

How did you become so great at what you do, I guess, today?

I definitely did not grow up with parents who pushed financial literacy in the household.

I grew up with what I call a WSF, a Wall Street father.

So I like to say that I'm like, if LeBron James's daughter couldn't shoot a free throw,

he never brought it home with him.

And so I grew up like really confused about money, sort of avoiding it,

thinking that it wasn't for me, that maybe I lacked this chip inside of me that would make it

possible for me to manage finances.

And so basically avoided at all costs.

Right, yeah.

I'm sure I can relate, but I was raised with parents who were very, I guess, stingy,

you know, with money, but I feel like we have so much to talk about.

We have so much to talk about.

So this podcast is, I do part two, obviously, and a lot of our listeners are learning,

basically just how to handle money matters in general, just better the second time around.

What is, would you say, the number one financial mistake you see most married couples make that

can just fast track towards divorce?

You know, it really starts, Cheryl, before people get married.

And I see so many couples, because I mean marriage is a legal contract at the end of the day.

That's what it really should be viewed as.

And I just see so many couples sign that contract without knowing much about the other person's finances,

about how much debt they have, about their relationship with money, about, you know,

how much they make, how much debt, like just all these really important questions.

People avoid because they think it's awkward, and they want to walk down the aisle,

and sometimes we get so focused on reaching that finish line, which I feel like society really

does put marriage as like for women, especially this finish line. We got to get there.

And when it's right within your grasp, you can sort of fool yourself into making a bad decision.

Right.

Joan, tell me about you. I mean, I mean, I know you, but our listeners, you know, you're a widow,

share your experience, I guess, with just taking control of just all the finances after

your husband passed. Yeah, that was kind of crazy, to be honest. I didn't know what the heck I was

doing. And that was like, look back at that, like, gosh, how irresponsible to not ever like dive

into that part of our marriage, but he was really good at it. He was the breadwinner. I was a

stay-at-home mom for most of our marriage. I worked part-time here and there, consulting, doing

things. But he was the money manager, and I did not worry about it. And then he passed away,

and I didn't prepare myself as he was dying. You know, he had pancreatic cancer. He lived for almost

two years with that. If I look back at it, I probably should have been more aware, but I was like

in caregiver mode. I wasn't in. Let me, what am I going to do after he passes away? I was

planning on him living. So when it happened, I was kind of blindsided to be honest. And I'm a smart

woman. I have a degree in computer science. I go back to school. I got another degree in interior

design and was planning on starting a business right after my last kid. He was a senior in college

when I was doing this. And then John passed away. And then all of a sudden, my life had changed.

And I remember one, like, really big wake-up call. And a lot. But one, like, really struck me. And

that was American Express of all things. You know, we all count on our credit cards. They're

always there for us. And I went to use my American Express card and it had been canceled. And it

wasn't because of unpaid bills. It was for no other reason that I wasn't the primary card holder.

And he had passed away. And somehow they figured that out. And they canceled my card. And we had

been cardholders. We had a huge limit. My husband made a good amount of money. And it was never

a question. And then all of a sudden, I didn't have a credit card. It was the craziest thing. And I

didn't know. So I applied. I then had to apply for the credit card. And I had like a, you know,

$5,000 limit or something. It was something like, kind of appalling. And I had to work

way up to it. So I started out as like an infant or like a college student, somebody who just came

out into the working world. And I was 58 years old. It was crazy. A lot of other wake-up calls,

including like health insurance. So now we don't have a business. My husband's

business folded after he passed away. I no longer have health insurance. I'd, you know, I was

starting like a child, like a person coming out of college. I was starting to know. And I figured,

I had to figure it out. I had no choice. I had to figure it out.

And how did you do? Who did you turn to? What did you have a business advisor? Or did you turn to

anyone? It's unfortunately, I didn't have the problem that I didn't have money. My husband

had life insurance. So I just didn't know how to use it. And I didn't know how to use it

smartly. Like I didn't know what I should be, you know, investigating. I didn't know. I was like,

I need health insurance. Like how do I go about doing that as a person who doesn't have no

longer has a business to rely on? Never had that problem before. You know, I needed a credit card.

I needed, um, I needed to buy a house, by the way. Right. Right. And John got sick. We moved to

a townhouse that I rented because I needed an elevator for him. He couldn't go up and down

stairs. So I was renting a home and now all of a sudden I have to go to a house and I have

no credit. So crazy stuff. I said that I didn't have money. I had money in the bank. I had five

million dollars. Of course. Right, right, right. And you can't, they don't care if you have money in

the bank. They care if you have a credit score. If you can pay a mortgage. Do you run into this a

lot, Haley? Like do you have seen this type of scenario? This is a common thing. What can people do?

Yeah. I mean, it's so interesting because I feel like a question that I get asked a lot. It's

a pretty generic, but it's like, who's your work for? And I feel like they want me to be like,

you know, 20 to 30 year olds, like, you know, but the truth is that the women that I love helping

the most are the ones just like you, Joan, who are starting over. And like those are the stories

that mean the most to me and that I get a lot of. And look, like, I'm a bit younger than you,

like even in that generational shift, the women have taken so much more control of their finances.

But we have to remember that, you know, we weren't even allowed to have credit cards till 1974.

Like really, in order to have any upward mobility, you had to marry a man and you basically went

from belonging to your parents to them belonging to someone else. And it was quite the norm to,

you know, be passive about finances. But yeah, I hear this, you know, what I'm really hearing is

that you had a money aha moment, which is something that I talk about in the book. And that could happen

to someone. It happened to me in my 20s, but it could also happen when your 58 and your husband passes

away, which I'm so sorry. But it's like, you know, whenever that happens, the most important thing,

and it sounds like you did this is to hit it head on. But I would say like to anyone listening,

if you're in a relationship and you are in the dark about your finances, A, it's very important

to have a plan about what happens when your spouse dies. And it's not a sexy thing to think about,

but I actually have a resource called the seven documents that you need in case you die,

that you get when you pre-order the book. And it has all this information. And I feel like no one

just ever says to you, like, hey, Joe, like, here's what you need. You need a pod for, so you can get

access to the bank account. You need a Todd's. You can get access to the, uh, to the investment

account. You need a will. Do you have, do you need a trust? Like, you know, you need to make sure

that you're even things like digital, um, responsibility. Like there's a feature on the iPhone that

lets you, um, have access to someone's digital life if they pass away, which is like, I have a

French, like, who's going through that right now? And it's really hard to, like, track down

everything digitally from the person who's, uh, who passed away. But it's like, you know,

there's a lot of logistics with death. And you were in a great, a really, uh, you were in a position

that I think a lot of people would wish for, which was that you had money. But what happens with

a lot of people is that they don't know what's going on. And then they're not only are they grieving,

but they're also dealing with the fact that they have a lot less than they ever expected. And

they're also having to, you know, come to terms with that reality. Yeah. Well, surprisingly,

like, it sounds like I had a, like a good amount of money. Obviously I did. Um, but I actually went

back to work because I felt like I didn't have enough. And I also wanted access to help care.

When you're 58, like, important. And, you know, it's like a sad reality because that's when you're

going to start needing it. And certainly my husband. And so I went and got a job because I thought,

well, I don't want to have to just rely on this, um, income that I have, like, this investment

income. I need to be more proactive about my future. Only 58. And this needs to last me a really

freaking long time. I'm helping. I love that. I love that about you. You just life has just started.

You know, there really is no, it's not too late for anything. It's really not too late. And I mean,

and to enjoy, you know, you, you work your whole life. So my husband and I worked our whole

life. We raised our four kids. We have last kid in college. And like the goal is like you have

resources now. You've worked. You've built this life together. And you're going to like travel

and buy the second house and do all these things. And then all of a sudden he was gone. And all

of this stuff that we've saved for now was now just going to have to keep me alive. You know, keep

me. He was going to continue working. So we were going to have all these great resources.

Now like that income, like the income source stopped. And now I had to plan for this fixed

amount of income that I had never done before. Yeah, the dream. Yeah. Thanks for sharing.

Um, back to you. Hey, before marrying somebody, what should every couple, you think like

experience should there be a five year plan? Should there be a retirement plan? Should there be

joint accounts? So I really believe in having a joint account, but also having individual accounts

because I just think that it's so important to be able to leave if you need to. Even if it's

like your dream relationship, like I share a story in the book of someone who was in a relationship

that she thought was her forever. And then it really took a turn. And because she had that money

on the side versus doubling down on the funds that they had together, she was able to basically

save her own life and got what she called a freedom apartment. And so for me, I also love, like,

I make my own money. And I really like making my own money. And so I think that like I would just

never want to be in a position where I had to ask anyone or justify any of my purchases,

because it's like, I work hard. I make good money. Like I don't want to have to ask for that.

But I do think that like when your life becomes entangled with someone, you need to treat it like a

business. So it really is about setting up a structure. So what does that mean? It means A,

you're having money dates. Money is a relationship. And just like any relationship, if you don't

spend time with it, then it's never going to blossom. It's never going to get deeper. It's never,

it's actually going to get worse. Relationships get a lot worse if you're never together.

And so you need to do that with your partner. But I also think there's something so amazing

about having a partner financially, because it gives you someone to build with and dream with. And

to not that you can't do that on your own. But I think that like it doesn't have to be something

that makes your life smaller. It can actually be something that brings you so much wealth.

And like helps you expand your financial horizons. But like you need to normalize talking about money

and make it something that you do together, even when you don't want to.

I kind of how soon into a relationship do you think is a good time to have those conversations?

Because they're super uncomfortable. I mean, if you think about like why is it easier to talk

about sex and it is to talk about money in a relationship? I mean, it's difficult. I still have a hard

time talking to talk about it. I'm engaged. Wow. Okay. Love that. Congratulations. Thank you.

You know, I'd say the right time is usually when you're at one of those crossroads, like you know,

you got to the point where it's like you're going to move in together. You're engaged. You're

getting a dog. Like where things got a little bit more complicated. You know? And but the thing is,

is like whenever you tie your finances to someone, like even if you're not married to someone but say

you're dating them seriously. And so you guys are like, okay, like we should go to credit card

together because like then we can, you know, use the bonuses to travel. And we're always going

into her together. And like this makes sense. We have shared expenses. But it's like when you do

that, then say that person defaults on the credit card. It's on you. So you never always, at the end

of the day, go into this life and we leave with one person and it's ourself. And a lot of people

get confused in relationships and lose that plot. And so you nothing is forever. But also yeah,

exactly nothing's forever. Statistically women outlive men. So it's like, you know, most women

are going to go through some version of what Joan did where it's like, you know, you have to deal

with the consequences of what you've been avoiding. That's the key. You're going to have to deal

with it at some point. So you should really start to think about it. We got to deal with it

throughout. Cheryl, it's like it happened to you the way that you were agreeing with what you

was saying. No, it's what you've experienced with this. I mean, no, not not not to that extent.

I mean, when I was married, we kept everything separate for the most part, right? So we did

start something, but it was like, you know, I was very, very long as, you know, so that didn't

really mean anything to be quite honest. But yeah, everything was pretty much separate. And I mean,

yeah, that's all I could say. And that was intentional. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe there was like a part of you

that knew it wasn't forever too. It's my parents. My mom is like, she's a business woman. So she

instilled all this in me. And she was raised very, very poor in the Philippines and created a

business and a life for herself on her own and was raising me as a single parent. And so she

has lived every part of life from not having food to, you know, obviously now very wealthy.

But that took a lot of work. And the one thing that she's always instilled in me,

since I was a little girl, is just don't ever depend on a man for money, period.

I feel like we're talking about, we have such good conversations about single women and people

that have, you know, starting their dating careers together. I am in the chapter of life where,

like, you know, maybe have lost a spouse or maybe you're divorced and you're going on to like

your chapter too. And I have a scenario because I certainly have friends that are like kind of

dating men and they're in their second chapter of life. What if you're a dating man and he is

in chapter two and he's always had a great career, but his ex-wife took him to the cleaners in

their divorce. And now he's back at square one and has wrapped up a bunch of credit card debt.

And if you were to make, and if you were to make things more serious, would you have to take on his

debt? How does that work? If you marry him? Yeah, if you marry him. It depends what state you're

in. It depends on what state, but to me, that sounds like a guy with money trauma.

That sounds like you should run for the hills. Yeah, and someone, yeah, someone,

I sort of agree because it's like, it's just the way that it was worded. It feels like someone

who's looking at women as a villain and it's going to maybe want to like get revenge on women

just in general from what they went through versus really wants to build like out of a place of

integrity. Yeah, that's me, Clifford Taylor, the fourth. You might have seen the skits,

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Well, somewhere along the way, this platform became bigger than I ever imagined.

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Hey, Ernest, what's up? Look, money is something we all deal with.

But financial literacy is what helps turn income into real wealth.

On each episode of the podcast, Ernest, we break down the conversations you need to understand

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Hi everyone, I'm Cheryl Strade, author of Wild and Tiny Beautiful Things.

I'm excited to share that I have a new podcast called Mind Over Mountain.

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We're there to support and celebrate each other. And that's not like a your story versus my

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mind over it. Yeah, exactly. And if I can't walk up and over it, I'm going to go through it.

Listen to Mind Over Mountain every Thursday on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts,

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Let's talk about money trauma because it is an actual thing. I mean, it's not just

we're not just throwing that phrase around, right? Like because it is. Like you can live in scarcity.

Like my my mom did and my mom I have to say still does because she will always feel like she's

poor no matter what, right? Like she will walk by a penny and she will literally pick it up

because every penny counts, you know? And like that's just and that she's getting older,

you know? It's like she's turning even worse into that, you know? So how can you break that trauma?

How can you do that if you say it's nervous? Like if you were raised with frugal parents,

if you're raised with people. It's generational trauma, right? Like it's more psychological. It's

like, you know, it's psychology, but have you experienced this? Yeah. So actually in my book,

Future Rich Person, I start the book. The first part of the book, there's four parts, is mindset.

And it's called part one, face it because I can teach you anything about money. I can teach you

about index funds, about emergency funds, about debt payoff, about investing, but none of what I say

is going to stick. If we do not identify and fix and work through why and what is the root of

your behavior? That is everything. That's what I always say. People say, oh, should I get a

therapist or a financial planner? And I say, go to the therapist first, work through it.

Because, you know, your behavior is going to keep reflecting your self identity.

So you just shift your self identity to be a future rich person if you want to actually take

control of your financial life. And first, you have to heal, right? You have to

heal that part. Identify your triggers. You have to calm down in the moment. So much of financial,

like, so many financial issues are just, I think, from like, lack of emotional regulation.

There's a lot that you need to sort of work through. It's not that it's impossible, but it's

sort of the same for anything. Like, say you're in bad relationships and you want to get in a good

relationship. You'll have to work through the trauma of your past relationships. Say you want to

fix your relationship with food. It's not just like going on a diet. Everything. Everything.

Everything is you have to get down to the root and take responsibility for yourself.

I look at the book you relate. You talk about your own experiences like so freely and openly.

And it kind of like, we gain your trust as we read your book. I spent a lot of my weekend reading

your book. And I love it. It's fun to read, right? Like, it's like, you actually want to read it.

So I took all kinds of pictures on my phone. I can't read them right now about like,

passages that I love that I wanted to like tell my daughter about. And now they really

as good your talk. I feel like you were talking to a friend. And I felt like I relayed it. Like,

I knew all those people you were talking about. You know, you'll give some quotes about or a

conversation you had with somebody and you say you and then her and then you and then her.

And I feel like I'm like, I know that conversation. I had that with my daughter. You talked about,

you know, that you didn't feel like you were going to be good at this because you're not a type A

personality. Yeah. And you had these friends that were type A and they were organized. And

you were the person who's going to the bar with your passport because you couldn't find your

driver's license. And I'm like, God, I called my daughter. I'm like, oh, I just met your like

twin. My daughter still doesn't realize this and hasn't for like three years. And she's

transferred to go to bars. So I felt like I did to everybody. So I'm just like giving you a

plug for your book. It was just so much fun to read. You sprinkled in all this great advice.

And it was almost like you were giving therapy and financial advice mixed in with a bunch of

really funny stories. I really love that. You're giving me so many chills. It's like so weird to have

the book like being right now. But it's that's exactly what I wanted it to be like was where it's

like a brownie with spinach in it. Yeah. Like it's the kind of book that you actually because how many

times do we buy a finance book or like a self-help book? And it's like we never actually

crack it because it's like fun. Yeah. It feels like self-punishment to do it. And it's like I,

what has made the biggest difference for me. And I would say this like about changing anything

of my life is when I'm able to find a way to make the change enjoyable. And I think that like with

finances, yes, there's going to be an element of cutting back and of like choosing your hard if

when you really want to improve your financial life. But there's also so much possibility. And I

think especially for, you know, your audience, people who are really looking to start over. And

you guys are both great examples of this. Like just see abundance of opportunity and how surprising

life can be and how much you can actually shift things and that they are in your control.

And like that's why I talk a lot in the book about learned financial helplessness because

especially right now, like economically, you know, the housing market is so messed up. The

student loans are so high. Since 2020, wages have increased seven percent. But inflation has

increased 67 percent. Like there's so many reasons why not. But the ones who win are the ones who

understand that the game was not built for everyone to win. It was actually built by the people

who are winning to keep right. But when you learn the rules, which is why I wrote the new rules

of building wealth, then you two have the opportunity to get a seat at the table no matter where you're

starting from. I would love that. Figure out how you figured all this out. You don't have a

background in it. You were in media. You had a really cool career that wasn't making you any money.

And you looked at your life and you're like, okay, this isn't working. How the heck do you start

this career? How do you become you? Because it seems like such an aspiration that most of us could

never even think about. It's so funny. It's like the I would it came when I started influencing

was not a thing. And so like every thing you know, I think the both of us, yeah, I can say the

same thing. Yeah. And so it's it came from a place of like where I'm patient zero and I needed to

help myself. And so and I thought in my head, oh, okay, there's definitely other people that feel

like this. And I wanted to make a difference. But like it really, I think that when you create

something from your like deepest wound, that's where the magic really comes. Yeah. And so like

that's how it all happened. But I also think that like, you know, thank God I never worked in finance.

Like they think all that it's like that I that I that I have the career before this that I did

because doesn't that just prove that anyone can do it? Like that's sort of what I try to get

across in the book, too, where it's like, yeah, I am a girl in the password at the bar. I'm not

walking on an incline with my like meal prep chicken and hairwashing schedule. Like I was on a

date last week and my hair caught on fire. Like, and I run a multi-million dollar business girls.

Like it's like, how did that happen? You know, I mean, we were leaning over to kids. There was a

little candle. It was I've got extensions in. And that's not a sign. I don't know what is. Don't

get it. It's so funny. I loved it. See, now her book is sprinkled through through that the whole

thing with these stories. Like her adderal addiction. Like I love it. I wouldn't be surprised that

that was vodka right there. I mean, I know it looks like it actually. Yeah, take a take a

swig. It's past five o'clock, right? I know. Oh, yeah, I'm drinking vodka right now. Yeah,

exactly. I'm drinking like a $13 water from here. I was like, you're just killing it. That takes

your life. Or at least by fine. I don't know. But you're just so relatable that nobody, like,

you don't intimidate us. I don't feel like you have this Harvard degree and you're telling us

how to do it in a way that none of us could do it. You are the one that's drinking the vodka

on the back. I'm not drinking a water. But I, but I next time I see you, we'll have a martini.

But I, but I, you know, I love a martini. But I do feel like that that there's, you know,

there's a lot of financial experts out there that make you feel like you have to be a certain way

in order to do this. And it's important for me to be like, no, you just have to be you. And like,

it's actually, you don't even, you just need systems. Like that's the biggest thing, too,

that I talk about in the book that's been the biggest reason that I become a millionaire is

like automation. And, you know, also forcing myself sometimes to do shit I don't want to do.

Like I say in the book, I have a money date every month. It's really important.

I never want to do it. I never want to do it. I force myself to do it. But then once I do it,

I'm fine. It works. It's a money date. So it's a time for money's a relationship. If you don't

spend time, you know, with someone or something in a relationship, the relationship's going to go

to shit. But most people manage their money off of vibes. Like they're avoiding their bank

statements. They don't look at their credit card bills. They're sort of just like, you know,

grin and bearing it and swiping it and hoping for the best. They're forgetting about packages that

they need to return. They're, you know, they have subscriptions. They didn't cancel. They're not

on top of it. Descriptions. Yeah. And it just feels so overwhelming. And I think that it's,

it is every day something that will weigh on you. So you need to create a system where you have

the time set to take care of it. So then you give yourself the freedom and the energy to live your

life without that weighing you down. Like it's actually a way to like live a better life.

So yeah, it's just set time every month that I review my finances, that I take care of all

those finance tasks. Yeah, I open my mail like all the shit that I don't want to do happens then.

And once I'm doing it, you can make yourself do anything and you start and you're going. And

it's not that bad, but it's like not that scary. I think people are just scared. Oh my god,

it's not scary at all. And what you realize also too, like I think that's what's so interesting

about this whole idea of like financial dependency for women is like actually like the most feminine

cool thing is the being in control of your finances and having like the power to choose your own

life. Like being able to like make your own decisions to say no to shit that doesn't serve you

to buy yourself what you want to walk away if you need to walk away. Yeah, to take to travel,

to like take care of the people that you love. Like this is you're the first generations of

women who even have that opportunity. And it's like I take it so seriously for us to take advantage

of that and to embrace it because you know, the patriarchy doesn't want us to be in control of our

finances because it keeps us dependent. And if a man feels emasculated because of it, that's not

your problem. That's his problem. You know, it's funny. I had that conversation with one of my

first dates with Chuck. So, Chuck, as the person I met on my season of the Golden Bachelorette Haley,

in case you don't know. And so he was, we on one of our first dates on TV, on camera, I made a

statement about like being financially secure. And I think I mentioned a number to him. And later on

in our, after we were even engaged, he said, why did you tell me about that? Why did you mention

that like on one of our first dates? I said, because I wanted you to know that I didn't need your

money. And that I wasn't in this for money. And I just put that out right away. And let's just

move on from that because I never ever want to be dependent on a man. I had that a month I was

married. And now I'm financially independent. And it feels really good to know that I can get my

own American Express now, even though I'm afraid to open this statement up pretty much every month

that it comes. It sits on my camera like five days. But I know that I get the app girl. And then if

you have the app and it's in your like digital wallet, it makes it so much easier. But like it's

why isn't so scary? Like it's like you your smart girl. Like it's like this is seventh grade math.

Like we have been so conditioned. And we have been so brainwashed. It is not that hard. It's not

that scary. Put on a song you like, you can drink your vodka to the bottle. Whatever takes to get

that there. Do it because I think what's scary though in jobs defense is like it's just like,

you know, what I spend the money to buy stuff. Yeah, tell me about it. I bought all of Sephora during

the Sephora savings event just this past. I know it's not so funny. The Sephora savings event

and everyone is like, well, it's not even that much you're saving. You're done. Yeah. I know.

I started about investment options quickly. Our luxury goods ever a good idea. Like

bronzer versus Sessionel bag. Oh my god. I like, I totally fell for the all the Birken stuff.

Oh, I haven't I haven't done that one yet. I haven't gone there. I haven't invested in that.

Yeah, it's they're not in. Look, here's the thing like I sell it. No.

So here's my issue with it is there's a lot of like media hype around Birken's being as good

of an investment as a stock market. Oh my god. Really? Yeah. Oh my god. It's everywhere where

they're like the Birk Birkins will beat the S&P 500 and the truth is it's like if you're getting

the like Lauren Sanchez special where it's like the most rare ass Birken in Paris and you're like

never actually wearing it and it's dramatically sealed and then you resell it and there's like

three of them in the world. Great. You're going to make a huge return because any you sell it.

Yeah, but also any good that is in demand that is so scarce and in great condition

is going to hold its value or increase. But the Birken resell market is flooded with inventory

and you will make some of your money back for sure but it's not an investment and I think that

it's crazy to have normalized $25,000 handbags as this like savvy financial choice when really

that's a fashion choice and I love fashion don't get me wrong but it's it's how you view it.

If you're getting a Birken because you love it it's cute you want to wear it great but it's not

none of these bags are investment pieces. They will maybe hold some of their value but it's like

you're maybe going to hold like 50% of the value. I mean I have very clued into the luxury

resell market. I used to flip a lot of bags and like it's a whole bag. What do you mean?

Oh my gosh I would go to Japan I would go to Paris I would buy rare bags and then I would

this would be like if the dollar was really strong in Paris and I would go and find vintage

Chanel bags or whatever and then I would bring them back. That's fun. It's so fun and I love

wearing them like it's like I have a fabulous bag collection and like that's like something that's

just like is fun in my life but it's not something that I look to as a way that I'm building wealth

for my future that's what my stock portfolio is for. So I don't think it's sort of a girl math like

we don't need to fool ourselves. If we want to get a bag and we can afford the bag get the bag

and enjoy the bag. Yeah no need to justify it. No need to justify it. Some things are just frivolous fun

and like I'm I fall for like all the girl stuff like you know I like to get my nails done I like

make up I like my hair I like clothes like it's all a pink tux and I I don't know it makes me feel

good makes me feel comfortable. And if you can write it off great yeah and I write off a lot of it.

Exactly.

A win is a win. A win is a win. I don't care which I'll say.

Yep that's me Cliver Taylor the fourth you might have seen the skits, the reactions,

my journey from basketball to college football or my career in sports media.

Well somewhere along the way this platform became bigger than I ever imagined and now I'm

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Hi everyone I'm Cheryl Straight author of Wild and Tiny Beautiful Things.

I'm excited to share that I have a new podcast called Mind Over Mountain.

In each episode I interview athletes, adventurers and adrenaline seekers

to discuss the inner landscapes and life experiences that informed and inspired their extraordinary

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what you already have inside. We come into this world fighting for our lives. All I'm going to do

is pull out what you already got inside. We're there to support and celebrate each other

and that's not like a your story versus my story. You're going to walk up and over that dang mountain.

You're not just going to put your mind over it. Yeah exactly and if I can't walk up and over it

I'm going to go through it. Listen to Mind Over Mountain every Thursday on the iHeartRadio app

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American Soccer is about to explode. The World Cup is coming.

We're almost sending on the only store of the chip.

SCAR!

You are so...

I'm Tab Ramos. I'm Tom Bo. On our podcast Inside American Soccer you'll get the real storylines.

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The biggest decisions. You're going to look at stats and numbers.

He has no shot at making this World Cup team. And the truth about the U.S. national team.

It wouldn't be a huge surprise if our team ends up in the quarter finals or potentially a great run

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You can't say you can't.

Listen Inside American Soccer with Tom Boehrn and Tab Ramos on the iHeart Radio app Apple Podcast

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Hey Ernest, what's up? Look, money is something we all deal with but financial literacy is what

helps turn income into real wealth. On each episode of the podcast's earny leisure,

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From stocks and real estate to credit, business, and generational wealth,

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So how about like vintage cars? Like if you were, I'm aging myself, but Jay Leno.

Oh yeah? You know, it depends on the car, but it's like, you know, watches can actually be a really

good. Yeah. Right. Like a Rolex. Yeah. Or you know, like a, but you know what?

Actually, no, my father passed away, and he had a few Rolex watches, and honestly,

I didn't even end up selling it because they were giving offering shit for it. So.

I think it all depends on the asset. Yeah, true. But you know, the best

place to put your money is in the stock market. And like trying to get rich quick,

and all these other ways is just going to be something that ultimately prevents you from

investing to your full ability. So can we talk about something like totally less glamorous,

but I know that a lot of listeners are single moms. And write it. I mean, how can you remove

the overwhelming feeling of saving for your future and your kids' future if you only have one

income? It sounds impossible. That's really hard. But what I will say is like, you have to put

your own oxygen mask on first because kids can take out loans for school, but you cannot take out

loans for retirement. And so it's like, you know, sounds awesome to, you know, give your kid everything

if they want, and all these things. But hey, financial boundaries are so important for children,

teaching them the value of a dollar, showing them what you're working for, and including them in

that process, I think is like so inspiring. But also don't prioritize their future over yours,

because then you also perpetuate a cycle of in like a family money cycle, where then they will

have to do that with their kids, because they will have retirement funds, and then they'll have to

rely on their kids for it. You know what I mean? So break the cycle now. Yeah, break the cycle now.

So easier said than done though, isn't it? So much easier said than done. I bet. I think it really

depends on your community too. Yeah. It's really hard if you're in a neighborhood where people are

in a different socioeconomic venue, because then it puts so much pressure on what's normal.

But you know, single moms, like that is, June, they are doing God's work. Like that is such a hard

position to be in. And I just think like, yeah, you've already given up so much to take care of

that child. Like don't give up your future too. You know, and by just taking care of them and

getting them out the door and like literally like like that's giving them a huge lag up from

everyone else. Yeah, and preparing them maybe go to college and then they break the cycle themselves.

They go and get a great education and can support themselves and you're good.

So thinking about being a mom and I have four kids, they're all grown. I never actually got them

credit cards, but I know that people talk about getting your kids a credit card so they can start

building some, you know, things that I ended up not having. I didn't have any credit. And so like,

do you recommend that or when do you recommend it at what age it, like what is the scenario that

that is good? Yeah, so what you're, you know, so interesting that you asked that, Joan, because like

you obviously were someone who really got the short end of the stick for not having a credit

history. So you understand firsthand how important it is to really build that credit at a young age.

And so what you're talking about is adding someone who's under 18 to your card as an authorized

user. And for my credit cards, they have a limit that you can only do when the child is 16,

but there are some cards where you can do it when the child is much younger. And it does

it mean that you have to give your child that card to use. You could put like your Netflix

subscription on it and put it on autopay and stick it in a drawer and they never need to know about

it. But it will begin to build their credit histories that then they could get,

instead of getting a starter card, they could get a rewards card. Or if they need to rent their

first apartment, they'll be able to do it. Like it just gives them, you know, they can

you get a loan for a car. They're going to get a better rate. Like it gives them a little credit

score is basically your financial GPA. So it's like, it's your score. It's like, it's that tells

lenders how trustworthy you are with money. So like for you, Joan, when you didn't have a credit

history, they were like, fuck no, I'm not giving that girl a mortgage. Like she has no, there's no one

can attest that she's going to pay it back. You got to stay in a hell out of dodge. You know, so we

need a base, it's like a track record that shows like, okay, you're someone who it's good for the

banks or whoever's lending the money to do business with. And so yeah, you can absolutely set your

kids up with a card. I think that's an excellent idea. There's also a lot of other great hacks in

the book for how to build generational wealth because, you know, if you do have even like $100

a month to put towards your children to their future, I mean, like I said, you have to put your

own mask on first, but that little, you know, $100 could $50 over time with compound interest can

grow so exponentially. So this is where I'm saying it's so much about understanding how things

work versus even having so much money or like, you know, any sort of other sophistication, like we

just live in a system where it's never taught. And so that's why the book is so powerful because it

gives you these sheet codes that you know, you can use to really get ahead in life and to put your

children ahead too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Can I ask you a question? I know that you had kind of indicated

that the stock market is, gives you the best ROI. I know in your book, you talked about really

basic things like making sure that you have a savings account that is, or a bank account that

is not charging you all kinds of fees and then having a savings account. So you actually earned some

interest on the money you have in the bank and a decent one, not one that is giving you like a

.04 percent return or whatever. But I have a question about investing. Okay, so let's say that you

want to invest in the stock market. I'm already in it. I'm asking this as a general question because I

have like a stock broker, but like what kind of fees should you expect? What ones are reasonable?

Like you talked about this in banking, but I maybe I haven't gotten to that point in the book yet,

but do you ever talk about it when it comes to investing in the stock market? What is reasonable?

What are the reasonable fees to pay? Yeah, it's such a good question, Joan, because it's like fees

really are the killer of profit and people don't understand usually their fees with these advisors.

And so what I talk about in the book is how there's two kinds of two different fee structures

with financial advisors. So one is a percentage of what you're earning and then the other is hourly.

And I think for most people an hourly sort of just planner is really all that you need,

because you can do it on your own, but sometimes it's nice to have someone like

tell you know set out the plan for you maybe you want you want something that's like a bit more in

depth, but then you're able to go and like make those decisions on your own. But you know fees can

get crazy. Like I've seen like and that when you look at it over 10, 20 years, it's like it could be

tens of hundreds of thousands of dollars in profit easily really look for like one percent.

Now how about for those who are in like the entertainment worlds where you have business managers

and you know like at the end of the day I don't do taxes and I never plan on doing them in that

sense. But I mean me too. I have a I have an accountant. Yeah. Uh for sure. And they they're so like

they helped me optimize so much because that's like being a business owner and also that's

the other thing in the book is like I really break down how to start your own business because like

we are the biggest generation of business owners and no one sits us down and says hey here's

what an S Corp is. Here's what NLLC is. Here's what you put away for taxes. I mean mind you this

is not just the entertainment industry. My parents have one like it's like you know you do get help.

Yeah. You get help. But I'm saying like the actual structure of like a like a business like we all

romanticize over going to start a business. But it's like no one actually ever tells you

here's going to do it in the best way. So that was so important for me to include because

the majority of people who read this I feel like are not majority but like a good amount are going

to not be working in corporate but actually be working for themselves. Um you know like 15% I would

say is normal. Yeah. I'd say 15 maybe 20 but like 15. Don't be paying 30. Yeah. I mean I think

people would not I wouldn't pay over 20 to be honest. Like I would like for me I'm paying 15

to my business manager. But he's sort of like my business partner. So it feels like of course

you're still the CEO. Yeah and I really believe also like he worked so hard I believe so deeply

in paying people well because like there's just such a bigger cost to having to replace

someone than there is to uh making sure they stay. And so yeah if I love working with someone

like and they're doing a great job like I just that's not something I will ever be stingy on.

Like I just like my business has to be doing better than for me to be worrying about like giving

you the rays that you deserve. That's not where I would ever cut costs. Haley I can't

leave this. It went really fast. This whole conversation. Thank you so much for your time but I

want to let's plug the book again because I can't wait to read it. Yeah you're going to like it

Cheryl. I want will you DM me when you start reading it? Of course. Are you going to do an

audible version? Yeah yeah. One thing I'll say about what's really cool for your audience is that

if when you pre-order the book you get $700 worth of freebies. So the book is like $30 but then

you're getting all these extra guides AI tools, generational wealth planners, credit card tool like

everything that you need to be a future rich person comes when you pre-order because I really

wanted to make it like you know just so that people for people and so if you're listening and

you're intrigued definitely pre-order and you could pre-order the audible which is so helpful too

because yeah and I read the whole thing it's so fun. I'm a big audible girly too but I will say

there is something nice about getting the physical book and then you highlight it and there's

I have checklist at the end of each chapter of like the action stuff that you should take

but you know that come with the audible as well. Yeah so you can download it. You'll get a PDF.

I love the action. I love how you like kind of organize the book.

Each chapter like I kind of know what I'm going to get at the end that I'm going to get the checklist.

So if I'm not like if I'm reading it for pleasure but then like you know one in the end to have

the kind of notes they're kind of at the end of each chapter so it's really really good.

You did a great job on this book. I have to say because I am not one to read a finance book.

It really means the world to me to hear you say that like again I have chills. I'm such a loser.

But like I'm not really that's amazing. That's what I like when I was read when I was writing it

a like that's what I wanted like I wanted to be like the person who's like I've never read one

like I don't know if I if this is for me like like and just be like damn I'm I'm body-ing this

I'm one thing and it's fun and I'm learning and like that makes me really happy so I'm so grateful.

Thank you. Is this your first book? My first book I'm hoping it's a I think it's like people

are going to really like it like it's yeah and I yeah I think that it will be something that you

like passed your friends like it's I you know because we need this there's not financial

advice out there in this way and also like I do believe like the the caliber of the advice

that I gave is so sophisticated like it's so approachable but it is the best advice out there

and that's that's why I've been in the game for so long is because I'm so trusted in that way

like I don't mind hold down like it's always correct what I say it's like I say in the book I'm

your financial dominatrix and she gets on and on about that which is really funny it's there's

like a whole like like sexual indowendo in the whole like that whole paragraph that is hilarious

I love that I mean I feel like I trust you for sure you're just straight to the point and I like

people like that so um where can people find you you have a podcast I started listening to it

and I'm hooked so good financial tea it's out every Thursday um if you want a prior to the book go

to mrsdowjones.com slash book and you'll get all those freebies um and yeah I'm on social media

as mrsdowjones I'm posting videos every day to help you get rich are you in chapter two and finding

out it's a lot harder than you thought it would be well we're here to help send us an email or leave

us a voicemail all the info is in the show notes follow us on socials I do part two and I heart

radio podcast where falling in love is the main objective

this is julian edelman host of games with names on our latest episode we got comedian

Blake Anderson from workaholics and the hilarious this is important podcast let's go

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apple podcast or wherever you listen to podcasts on a recent episode of the podcast money and wealth

with john whole brian i sit down with Tiffany the budginista eliche to talk about what it really

takes to take control of your money what would that look like in our families if everyone was

able to pass on wealth yes to the people when they're no longer here we break down budgeting

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were never ever taught if you've ever felt you didn't get the memo on money this conversation

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