Why You’d Regret Being a Constable in Tudor England

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Tonight, you’re not a knight, a noble, or even a criminal with a good story. You’re a constable in a small Tudor town—a man too poor to be respected, too official to be liked, and too tired to care. You’ll spend your week chasing thieves with no weapons, enforcing laws you barely understand, and getting blamed for everything from street brawls to sausage theft. You’ll be spat on, bribed, ignored, and occasionally beaten with your own staff. And if you’re lucky, you’ll get through Sunday without crying in public.

Welcome to the life of a Tudor constable: overworked, underpaid, and one mistake away from being replaced by someone younger, cleaner, and more Latin-literate.

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