#520 - Moheathcliffe, #FindTheFlax and Che Guevara On QI

Hello everyone and welcome to the Ellis James and John Robbins podcast and you find us

in a period of flux.

It's safe to say, we're unsettled. There's a lot going on. There's a lot going on in my world

that you two don't know about. No, there isn't. It's the Chris. I just asked. Are you going

to tell us? Yeah, as the theme tune was playing. It's because you had too much hot sauce this

morning. That's what a lot going in in his world means. That's part of the picture, Dave.

Okay. That's an element of the landscape. What? Too much hot sauce to describe a leg is part

of the picture of your big week. Yes, it is actually. Well, no, my big day. I am engaged in a

quarterly battle with an Indian take away. You text me, right? And the text says, so last text

Christmas day. The text says EG, right? I'll get it up here. For 25% off, please order between

one and four every year or whatever. Yeah. Right. To stop this message, text stop to this number.

Okay. Not the number the message comes from. So you text stop to the number they give you

message, not delivered. So that number must be dead. But the number they're texting from,

and I've never seen this before, has no number. It's a ghost contact. Okay. It's impossible.

Getting texted by a ghost curry. I'm getting texted by a ghost curry house. And like, sure,

I could report them to the mat. Yeah, right? But you like curry. And they'd love that. Yeah,

but hey, it's a good curry house. But it's not anywhere near me. So every quarter we go through

this dance of me not being able to text stop to get their offers. What do I do? So you don't

even know which curry house it is? Oh, I know the name. Let's give them a call. Could you not call

them then? No, because they're you were ghost. Well, no, because there's no number on the thing.

I don't know where it is. If you know the name of the restaurant, you could go to it presumably.

Okay, how many curry houses do you think are called gandies in the UK?

Okay. Well, I can think of two. Yeah, that are within my post-cult. So I would have to call

each individual curry house. But you were ghost curry. I've got a lot on actually. I had too much hot sauce.

His eyes watered. My skin's gone blotchy. No, it's all right. Because there were three hot

sauces. There were. And a chili jam. And each of the hot sauces was exceptionally hot and I had

all the fun. Well, you, you know, you're the director of a company now. Surely you can employ

someone to bring all of the gandies. Dave, look into that actually. That's a bad idea.

Could it you remember a staff to call every? It's going to be in England. Dave,

yeah, you're conducting some interviews this week. What about a problem-solving exercise?

Yeah. It's already got one of them in the mix, mate. Well, curry-based. Yeah, really bit.

What sort of problem-solving? Don't give it away because they might be listening.

Oh, yeah. They might be defusing. You know, it's like pick up all my pants.

Come around and pick up all my pants now and cook me a decent lasagna. Yeah.

Just for the sake of HR, it isn't pick up all my pants. Okay. Oh, yeah. I think there's

problems down my pants. No, absolutely. And again, you're not allowed to use your hands.

Dave, do you not remember the opening speech I made about how HR is BS and we don't do HR?

We do. We do J.R. We do. Yeah. That's getting trouble. John resources.

Yeah, but it's going to be in England, presumably. This Gandhi's. I can I guarantee it's in

England. It's not Scotland or Wales, right? It's okay. Let's not with lit down any more than that.

Just for... God, you're obsessed with HR and you know, GDPR and all that stuff.

Jigsaw identification of a curry house, which I'm sure is probably fine. But we're not

saying it's bad. We're just saying that it's a ghost curry house that texts John.

Yeah. I don't think they're consciously trying to sort of deceive me or stress me out.

They obviously set up a phone to get the notifications, which is no longer in use.

Yeah. You can block them, but I am going to sadly report us junk.

And that will be the last mischief. Well, if the system works that I get from Gandhi's.

Well, as we've talked about, I think there is a rule now that you have to make it extremely

easy to unsubscribe. Yes. Oh, a lot of people don't do it. Yeah. A lot of people don't.

Your white male. Yeah, you can't. You can't. In it forever.

Yeah, you're laughing. That actually automatically subscribes everyone in your context to it.

However, there is a darker underbelly to my day. Oh, yeah. There is a cataclysmic event.

The ramifications of which I don't think we'll see in the economy until the next

Bank of England interest rate decision. You've lost your wallet. No, I would not be here

if that were the case. Okay. That's good to know. You would not see me or hear from me again

until I found it. And if I didn't find it, I would die. That's good to know. Okay.

You've been filing your finances wrong for 10 years.

Not worthable. I cannot express how much I'd love that. Not possible. I mean, that wouldn't be

possible. Yeah, it is. It could be. What have you been putting in the right? I went mad.

Yeah, I'd say yes to strictly. If what have you been putting? What have you been copying and

pasting the wrong that code for the past 10 years? What am I copying and pasting a that code for

just for your own invoicing? Well, you bought what have I put you put the wrong that number on?

Well, that actually wouldn't be a problem unless the person I was invoicing got

audited and they picked that up. I occasionally worry that I've been getting my

national insurance number wrong forever because I lost my national insurance card in about

2000. Yeah, I'm occasionally worried that I remember it right. After you're having to ride,

aren't you actually insurance? Oh, quite a lot. Really? Yeah. Okay, so what's this big event, John?

It last, okay, I'll give you a clue. It last happened 233 days ago.

No. 233 days. You lost Bockel, a Bockelkin to Los Angeles. Very, very, very, very close.

You lost the struggle. I lost my word or streak. Oh, no. Okay. 233 days of hard work.

Because you've got 133 days. No, it's because I didn't get it. Oh, wow.

In my defense, some bots didn't get it. Okay. In my defense, an awful lot of the words,

one of the words that it could have been, which I tried, isn't even in the chamber's dictionary.

Okay. But you tried that word. So that was a mistake, surely. Well, I was running out of options.

Okay. And you were panicking. I was, well, I wasn't panicking. I was thinking, oh, it's not

that it's probably going to be this. And then the other option, I thought, well, it can't be that.

It's the hardest, every wordler knows, the hardest situation is where none of the words it could

be feel quite like they would be wordless words. Average solve across the world was 5.2.

And I didn't get it in six. It was that hard. A lot of people will be losing their streaks today.

If you are one of them, I'm with you. I get you. Okay. I fear your pain. All right, then.

But I realized life will never be the same. So that's why when I asked you how you heard this

morning, you didn't say fine or you just, you just grunted the word. The word of action.

Is this a sign? Maybe just to shake hands with a word and say, do you know what, chap?

It's been a hell of a run. We've had our fun. We've had our ups and downs. Maybe,

is it cognitive decline, maybe? Maybe we should just part ways with the word or word.

No, Dave. Do you know what I think it is? It's a sign to say it's time to kiss

a word on the lips, to run your hand down the small of its back, to feather the top of its bum

cheeks, and to, with consent, begin into course. This is why I need HR.

This is why you can't run nature.

Yeah, so I'm just going to have to double down more time, more spreadsheets, more notes,

more prep. Be better. Be better. Be better.

Yeah. Oh, I've had another mega week. Have you met the pro minister again?

No, I cue I'd. Oh, I often think, and I'm happy for him.

If you're a cue I'd, you'd be great on cue I. Yeah. A lot of people would be good on cue I.

I often think if I was in the world. Nelson Mandela would have been good on cue I'd

they didn't ask him. What does that tell you? He had more on his plate than you though.

Yeah, but they didn't ask him. They didn't ask.

Who are the candy? They didn't ask candies. The curry house.

They didn't ask probably Steve Redgrave, five time gold medalist.

Steve Redgrave, Steve Redgrave. I don't think he's been like me.

No, I don't think he was. They weren't. They weren't.

They just took Neil Armstrong. They didn't ask Neil Armstrong.

Buzz Aldrin. They didn't ask Buzz Aldrin.

John Robbins. They haven't asked John Robbins, and he's fine with that.

You know, I, oh, am I fine with being in a group with Buzz Aldrin.

Neil Armstrong, Steve Redgrave, Ghandi, Nelson Mandela, and David Beckham.

David Beckham, well, they were right not to ask him.

So that's the group of people who weren't asked on cue I.

Yeah, the people who have been on cue I, Ellis James.

Yeah, I don't know. I couldn't tell you.

I'm not actually hurt of it.

And some other idiots. Yeah.

I went to, I went to watch Diverburn at the Hammersmith Apollo,

which I think might be the, the best thing I've ever seen.

Really? I didn't know you're into David Burnham.

I really like talking heads.

My friend Clevary One saw his last tour in Kandiff,

and Clevary One's a big theater head.

And he said, that is the best thing I have ever seen.

And I talked to Matthew Crosby, and I have a Graeme.

They saw the last one of the Apollo.

And they said, yeah, that is the best.

I've never met anyone who's seen it.

It doesn't say it's the best thing they've ever seen.

So we went this, I went this time round.

And it's just, it's just exceptional.

It is.

So it said the Apollo, it's more of a kind of,

it's not really a gig.

It's a theater piece slash art installation slash gig

with lots of choreography and amazing visuals

and visual montages on the light show.

The last time I was at the Apollo,

it was to perform there with the two of you.

And it did break the fact that I was asking,

well, if I knew them in front of two ballastans

into Sharpsons.

That was an art installation.

It didn't feel like an art installation.

Why?

How much were the burn tickets?

They were 84 quid, I think.

Well, there you go.

So there you go, there you go.

It's an extra 50 quid.

It's an extra 50 quid.

It's an extra 50 bucks.

Exactly.

He's not staying in a premier end.

No, and we didn't need to.

And we didn't need to.

But they know.

But there's 13 of them on stage.

So because I did a gig last night,

and my friend, Dave, the jazz drummer was there.

And I was talking to him about David,

but I said, there's 13 of them on stage.

Well, that's his first mistake.

But I did that.

I also did a charity sprint on the pitch at Dulley, Shamless.

Yes, there's been a lot of talk about this.

A lot of discussion on social media.

A lot of clips, in fact, haven't there Dave?

I've seen a fair few clips, actually, as it goes, Ellis.

Before we get to the race.

Yeah.

Because it was a big moment for you.

It's been, because it was postponed, wasn't it?

It was meant to happen last year.

It was postponed to September.

It was meant to happen in September.

There was meant to happen in January,

but they were Dulley, Shamless, football club,

but drawn against someone in a...

I don't know if it was the FA Cup.

It must have been a cup of competition of some sort.

So then we did it on Saturday.

Yeah.

And we used to raise money for synchronous hospice,

who provided incredible end-of-life care.

I have been nervous about it for months.

My nerves always follow the same pattern.

I pretend it's not happening for months,

but there's just the general background

of anxiety on the day in the morning.

I try to get out of it, and I can't get out of bed.

And then when it actually gets the event itself,

I'm like, it's go-to.

So what's the...

It's go-to.

What do you nervous about?

I just... there were lots of people.

There was 3,200 people there.

And, you know, I'm not a sprinter.

I died back to differ.

But I was... I was... I was... I think I thought...

I was worried about falling overall,

if you're merely a team.

It doesn't have to.

It's for charity.

I know, but I was...

I was wondering if it was going to be right.

Yeah, there's another bit.

Another big concern.

It was quite...

I don't know why I was nervous.

I just... I just felt...

I think it's fair enough to be able to do something new.

It's a bit scary, isn't it?

I'd be scared about going on QI.

That'd terrify me.

Yeah, but that sort of feels in your wheelhouse a little bit.

That's strange.

This on your wheelhouse.

But that's just strange.

And it's not in... No, no.

But it's all Nelson Mandela.

Nelson...

Would Nelson Mandela...

A She Guevara.

Would She Guevara have been nervous about QI?

I wouldn't have been so...

You would have said these irrelevant to all of my operations.

I'll do it.

No, I'm having a...

I've heard of Stephen Fry.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He's a Sunday Talks figure.

Yeah, I know. Yeah, yeah.

She Guevara doesn't know, Sandy Talks figures.

He's heard of Stephen Fry.

Right. Well, I've heard of Sandy Talks figures.

Well, I think it's unlikely.

Okay.

Okay.

But Fry's reputation is enough for She Guevara,

so I'm going to get off my motorbike and get on a flight.

I will be wearing...

A battery.

A military battery.

I will be wearing political clothing

and the BBC can like it or lump it or pixelate it.

The BBC can be pixelated.

The BBC can be pixelated.

I don't think what they do when you do TV shows.

They ask you to bring clothing options.

That is the one thing I don't think She Guevara would have done.

And they said, listen, it's this.

It's a military for teams in the fairies.

No, he's not bringing two ships.

No, he would have a comical quip, I imagine.

No, I think he'd be quite serious.

Now, he's dry, but he's got a glint in his eye.

Tim, the deadline number's dry.

I don't think She Guevara would have been dry.

And it'll turn out he knows an enormous amount

about bird migration.

100%.

He'd have been...

Actually, yeah.

And then he'd have ended up winning.

And he wouldn't have said anything.

He's nervous about running.

Yeah, it was my friend Geiront, my dear friend Geiront,

Ross's lovely wife, Debs, to cancer a few years ago.

So he texted me, he said, no, he just texted me last year.

He said, what are you up to?

I responded with a video of me winning the dance race.

Great.

My daughters.

Small stay because I am the fastest dad in key stage two.

Still.

So there you are, a sprint to them.

Yeah, but not professional.

I'm just...

Stop, just keep saying.

The files, modest teams, come on.

I'm just...

You love how fast he is.

I'm just hugely gifted.

You know how he goes, just to pass this talk about his...

He's hugely gifted.

What's the phrase, fast-twitch?

Fast-twitch, puzzle fibres.

I'm a big ball of fast twitch muscle fibres in jeans.

And he wanted to humiliate your friend.

He sadly lost his wife in front of 3200 people.

I was wrong with you.

So, I...

He said, what are you up to?

I'm up to the horrible.

What a horrible man.

He's...

You've got him right where you want him in the palm of your hand.

This poor guy.

He was a very talented schoolboy athlete, Geraint.

Yeah.

Very sort of school's 800 meter champion, all that kind of...

He did like a 35 minute 10k when he was...

I'm sorry, he's slow to switch.

This isn't fair.

You're going slow to switch.

He's slow twitching confidence.

So I texted him.

I said, this is what I'm up to.

I've just won the dance race, sent in the video.

And he went, right, you, me, on the pitch,

still his hamlet.

Half-time, all the many girls, synchristophers.

I'd say he's an ideas, man, isn't he?

Absolutely right.

He spotted an opportunity.

Ellis closes his phone.

Just laughs and laughs and laughs.

Calls Izzy and says, Izzy.

You're never going to leave him.

I found my victim.

Great.

So...

Yeah.

So there was the buildup to it.

It's so...

You're nervous.

I was nervous.

I did win.

I must admit.

Well,

before we get to the performance itself, Ellis,

because this deserves a bit of something, doesn't it?

Do you think?

I think so.

It's been in your mind for a while.

We talked about this during the tour.

I remember you talking to me quite a lot about the race,

because it was good.

It was due to come up.

I think maybe towards the end of the tour.

Yeah, we could do it in September initially.

And then something happened.

We couldn't do it in September.

Well, we've all seen the social media clips.

Well, not everyone might have done this.

Good conditions for running.

Not bad conditions.

Yes, I thought that.

You wouldn't want to be absolutely hammering it.

That was my worry with Januri.

It would have been horrible in January.

If it was one of those, like, 1970s, like boggy gold.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Like the Facebook round.

So we thought we would supersize the moment a little bit

for the podcast recording, because we're nothing

if not creative and vicious producers.

What would you mean by that?

So we've got the footage.

And we will now hand over to television presenter

and athletic commentator, Steve Kram,

to take us from here.

Hello, I'm Steve Kram.

And a very, very warm welcome

to the aptly named Champion Hill,

the home of Dulwich Hamlet FC,

for the very first.

And to be honest, probably the last box-to-box challenge.

This is a sprint race of approximately 70 meters

between two of Wales biggest sporting egos.

Ellis is taking on his great friend Gerand.

And we've got a large crowd gathered here,

two and a half thousand people at Champion Hill.

And I'm looking around now and they seem

completely uninterestingly happy.

But there is a lot at stake here.

Ellis, looking resplendent in the all-white

of his beloved Swansea city, obviously touting

for a washing powder endorsement afterwards.

And Gerand, or Baz, as he's known to his friends,

he's wearing the card of city kit.

Incidentally, some say that the nickname, Baz,

refers to his resemblance to the Welsh wizard Barry John.

However, others say it's more of a reference

to England cricket team's batting style

as he's likely to collapse.

I do also apologise about the dubious coverage here

from the Horse Broadcaster.

It's what we refer to as a phone in the stand.

Start as Marksman calls them to the start line.

Look like they're waiting for a bus here.

And now they go down.

They both adopt the starting position.

Last used at the 1896 Olympics in Athens.

Interesting.

And where they go.

And look at Ellis go.

He's driving those thighs forward.

Look at the power he's developing.

Gerand, deceptively slow.

It's going to be a win for Ellis here.

Ellis takes it.

Arms are off.

Wheels away.

It's like he's won the Olympic 100m final.

Embarrassing to be honest.

But it means so much to him.

A little bit over the top here.

But he set his stall out.

He trusted his ability.

He picked some average opposition.

And he is the winner.

Nobody else here understands why this has mattered so much to him.

But let's enjoy the moment with him.

Ellis may have crossed the finish line first.

But the real winner here is the charity

in Christopher's hospice.

Well done, Lars.

Oh, well done.

That was amazing.

What a moment.

That's amazing.

That's good because you like your commentary.

Yeah.

You've got a sense.

You've got a lot of money.

He's the first middle-distance runner as I remember.

That's what I'm saying.

It's all E.T.E.

I don't realise.

That's an lovely voice, Steve Krump.

And thank you so much for doing E.T.E.

and that around very quick place.

Very generous with his team.

Unsecrested, you can still donate to Sprint for Debs.

So while done so, yes.

Now we can talk about the performance.

Because you now have the surprise of Steve.

Good race.

Thank you very much.

Strong.

Felt good out there, actually.

Did it?

You know, it felt less good outspinting

my friend has lost his wife and from the 3000 people

that I anticipated it would actually be.

Why, I didn't look like it.

You celebrated it.

I know that.

I caught myself by surprise.

I was actually in a need to rub his face

into the penalty spots.

No, but I went into the weigh-in.

I was beat by chest.

Yeah.

So I was flicking the V's back in.

I didn't flick the V's, but I did.

He was texting me afterwards and he was like,

you were running around with your arms

off like a sort of bird in flight

just lapping up the applause.

You can understand how you'd get carried away.

It's adrenaline.

It's adrenaline.

I'm a big game player.

Yeah, he didn't see you saying,

bowl just jogging off after a bit of wind, did you?

He celebrates.

The sprinters haven't just jogged off for about 60 years.

They now milk it.

Yeah.

And you know, I'm part of that community.

Great.

So, we've got some correspondence.

And I don't know if it's covered in the correspondence today.

But the missing flex

has gone national.

Yeah.

I've heard from so many people

who have can't find flaxseed in Tesco.

So this was your local Tesco had moved it.

Yeah.

But they wouldn't have one over on you, would they, John?

No.

The intro to last Tuesday's show

where they tried to make a fool of me.

They did.

And they've also put it in a mad place.

We've actually had an email on this.

Have we?

Just to say, although you mocked, John,

his flaxseed intro was genuinely helpful.

I too, with the same issue that we can,

was forced to leave Tesco empty-handed.

Thanks to his tip off and his tip off alone.

I've gone back in today in front of flaxseed.

Move to the serial aisle.

I never would have thought to lose this.

Was yours on the serial aisle?

Yeah, but well, at the end of the serial aisle,

there's a porridge section.

Yes.

And it was above the individual porridge pots.

Got.

I thank you for your public service, John.

A norm.

This person doesn't want to be named understandable.

This flaxseed obsessive.

I was actually contacted by the makers

of that brand of flaxseed.

Do you work?

Have they say that this is a known problem?

They have no...

And they live it?

Yeah, they have no idea why Tesco have done it.

Some of them are big flaxseeds.

Some of them are big flaxseeds.

No, I never thought about the brand.

Like a damage to taking.

So the remnants of dips.

Wow.

Because people can't find the flaxseeds.

So nice.

I said you should make this into like a social media thing.

Find the flaxseeds.

Find the flaxseeds.

Flaxseeds great.

So you could get like kids.

You could give them the phone and say,

right, you've got to find the flaxseeds.

You've got a 30 seconds, but it won't be where you think it is.

Yeah.

That's fun.

Well, do you keep getting into it?

And flaxseeds.

We'd like some sort of things.

Hashtag find the flaxseeds with John Robbins.

You keep QI.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You keep QI.

Because I've got Netflix online one.

Fun flaxseeds.

God, Amazon online too.

And it's hashtag find the flax with John Robbins.

It's Friday fun flax.

It's that flaxseed feeling.

Dave, we're gearing up for the weekend with Friday fun flax.

So yes, thank you for all the messages I've received.

So you've received messages from flax fans.

From flax creators.

And flax creators.

And people who...

And flax influencers.

And flax influencers.

People who can't find the flax.

Yeah.

And they now know where the flax is.

And it's just...

You just have to go there.

I think so.

I can't confirm.

No.

They should off.

They should make you a minority investor in their company.

Because you've actually driven up revenue.

Well, I tell you people have to find the flax.

I've driven awareness about...

That's the most important thing.

I've driven awareness about a very important issue.

I'm aware we have mentioned Tesco a few times.

But it's fair to say that just a teaser head.

Coming on Tuesdays.

What are you doing?

What are you doing?

I don't know.

Don't ever ask a question.

You don't have some secrets.

Never ask me that, John.

You know I don't know.

Yes, there will be more balance.

Yes.

In an also probably quite problematic way,

which you'll have to manage on the fly.

We've had a message from What Three Words.

Yes, I saw this.

Which I'm completely new to.

This is new to What Three Words.

I did find the What Three Words of the place

where I want my decomposting body to be spread by you guys.

And I will share it with you because it is very appropriate.

Is there a partnership here between

Flaxseed companies who have lost their products

and What Three Words?

Ah, this is huge.

Why, you're on the medium box, Dave.

That is a stupid idea.

If they could find by Flaxseed could be the three words.

Sponsored by What Three Words.

It's a match made in heaven.

Dave, you should live in California.

Yeah.

I don't want to.

No, not a way.

No, not a way.

No, not a way.

As a long time listener and having worked at What Three Words

for the best part of eight years,

I was delighted to hear John extolling the virtues

of our Three Word Dressing System on Tuesday's pod.

Given his love of words, numbers,

and generally being a man of logic and precision,

it's no surprise John is already a What Three Words user.

But I thought you, and indeed the listeners,

might like to know the answer to the question posed

and also enjoy some other fun facts

about how the system is designed,

which might woo Ellison Dave to the more precise side of life.

They've not said anyone else is using it

to designate where they want their decomposing body

to be spread, because no one will be.

I imagine.

Well, that feels like the first use.

US, do we filter root or inappropriate words out?

The answer is yes, we do.

In the core word list that we use to assign the three meter squares,

their What Three Words Addresses,

we remove words that might be considered offensive or rude.

Whichiles used to send us What Three Words for the venue details?

I just thought he was being wacky.

I've never heard of it.

So, Giles is the tour manager.

Yeah.

So, what did you think it meant where it said,

like, stage door is grass at all airport?

I was like, God, he's so crazy.

So, he's being like Noel Fields.

Yeah.

We also remove proper nouns,

excessively long words, and homophones words that sound the same,

but are spelled differently.

Ellis can be 10 examples.

Which and which?

Great.

That's just there.

There and there and there.

Great.

Great and great.

Great and great.

Oh, well done.

Very good.

You're very useful for cryptic cross words.

Pop and pop.

Feet.

Pop noise and pop to mean father.

No, that's not a homophone.

Because that's spelled the same.

Are they spelled the same?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, sorry.

Feet.

Feet and feet and feet.

While we do this and the resulting addresses are intended

to be completely random, naturally,

sometimes there are some entertaining

or serendipitous combinations that crop up.

Oh, great.

For example, well, there is, unfortunately,

no three word address, boys, boys, boys.

On account of the similar sounding boat related,

buoys, buoys, buoys, boys, boys.

You could, in fact, be rescued from a rogue boat party

in the Arctic Ocean at Lads, Lads, Lads.

No way!

I don't understand if that one works.

We're just three, the word three times.

So that's Lads, Lads.

Oh, see, there is, so the same spelling of the word

can be used.

Sorry, I misunderstood.

Yeah, but you couldn't have, you couldn't have that

if it was great, great, great.

Spelled differently.

Yeah, because the person who you're calling

on the sat-sat-a-light phone saying

the stag-do boat is sinking.

Lads, lads, lads.

They'd be like, yeah, okay, well, no, come and rescue us.

Lads, lads, lads.

Yeah, okay, you're having a great time.

Yes, real.

And one of my favorite recent examples

was a company called Kangaroo Self Storage

in Tyneside, where the front entrance

what three words address was hops pouch stuff.

No way.

Way, day, you.

And that's random.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I think they're going to get to a point

where they're probably selling decent three words, aren't they?

For relevance.

Surely.

Another superb idea.

Dave, do you work for Nvidia?

Are you a large language model?

Dave.

Isn't it, isn't it?

Clept.

It's not topping you up, but you can wind up

for Facebook.

No, I'm just an enterprising chap.

That's a big cause.

Because I have enterprising.

So you wanted lads, lads, lads to be the

what three words for your strip club?

Oh, yeah.

Or...

Scout hut.

Not, not a jewel use venue.

And you could say to what three words is 10 grand.

Yeah.

It's like a domain.

And you swap it.

Because the middle of the Atlantic Ocean

isn't going to be annoyed that it's what three words is.

Oh, it's not a strip club.

There it is.

Do you know how many...

There's 57 trillion.

At a pound each, Dave.

You're already the richest man on earth.

Man, to have ever lived.

You're missing a trick.

Dave.

Dave.

I've always liked you.

And when you're a trillionaire,

help me out, mate.

I'm actually a 57 trillionaire.

Well, the only way I could be the trillionaire

is by setting up a rival company.

Or they let me in at the ground floor.

Dave's three words.

Dave's three words.

You could absolutely revolutionize Cheedle Hume

with 57 trillionaire.

You could end global poverty many times.

Many times, yeah.

And I'd choose to.

Yeah, I would choose to.

Because you're not mad.

No, I'm not mad.

Just enterprising.

So we have plenty more geekery to share,

but I'll leave it there.

Yours in precision.

Jane and the team at what three words?

Thanks for the info.

Useful.

Wow.

We okay.

I think companies could buy four numbers

they wanted at one point.

Yeah, well, it's that like 0800.

Date, date, date, or whatever.

Yeah, you buy it for that thing.

There was a taxi company in Halford West.

Landline four numbers in Halford West

tend to start with seven six.

And so they're four numbers.

Seven six five four three two one.

Which was obviously enormously sought-after because it's on them.

Right, everyone.

I think it's time for us to chat to Uncle Adrian

and see what he's been up to.

Ellison, John, join us.

How are you, fellows?

Very well. How are you, Adrian?

Yes, I'm doing all right.

I've got a favour to ask you.

I'd like you to ask me a random question

from time to time when we get into this section of the show.

Because each week, I do it.

I do it. I know my ingredients.

Yeah, well, I've asked you.

I've asked you.

Do you own a drill?

I've asked you if you ever

engaged the services of a dominatrix.

I don't mind doing the random stuff.

I'm doing all the heavy lifting here.

So it's over to you.

Okay.

Are you scared of spiders, Adrian?

Yes, but not as frightened as I was.

But no, I'm not like, not fond of them

or a mice and rats.

I'm really terrified of.

What about your rats?

I've got a problem here.

Have you ever been in a hot air balloon?

I have never been in a hot air balloon.

I would like to go in a hot air balloon.

Actually, what do you hate most about yourself?

What do I hate most?

I mean, there's a lot to choose.

There's a lot to choose from there.

I think it's just losing things all the time.

All that I lose things.

Okay.

I will put something.

I'll have something in my hand.

Nothing suddenly it's not there.

I don't know where it is.

There's stuff I literally,

and it's important.

I literally never see again for no reason.

That's what I hate most about myself.

I've gone into the airtags scene because of that.

Yes, well, I've got eight of airtags.

And I still lose things.

And I'm going to buy more as well.

Headphones.

That's what I hate most about myself.

Losing headphones.

I buy expensive headphones.

Lose them.

I'm getting enough to sort,

sell a tape in airtags to headphones.

When you were a kid,

did you have any male relatives who are missing a finger

who used to make up stories about how they lost it?

And it turned out it was just an industrial accident.

I had one who did lose a fingernail.

I was like, I don't know.

So I had to think, was it my granddad?

And it might have been a factor.

I thought there might have dreamt that.

So I'd love to have given you a straight know there.

But there was something there, yes.

Well, I think, you know,

people moan about health and safety.

But far fewer uncles and grandads

are missing fingers these days.

And we're all the poorer for it.

As if we are from a childhood experience.

They would say it was bitten by a shark.

I put my finger in a hole.

In a hole that it just came off.

Yeah.

And they would do little tricks with it.

Where am I getting that from now?

Might have to imagine it.

West Brahms were in the Dublin,

Inter in the World Cup.

What do I think is more likely?

No, no, if you give a chance, one.

Oh, God. West Brahms are so far off that.

I'll go for England to win the World Cup

at the list on this occasion.

Or Croatia, for that matter, either or not.

Have you ever had a lip salves

that smell so nice, you ate a bit of it?

No, I haven't.

I've sniffed deeply,

but never actually had a nibble on it.

In the 90s, were you embarrassed

to play lips of in public?

No, I've always been very comfortable with...

Have you ever lifted anything from a JD sports?

No, I haven't.

Do you still use a mouse on your desktop?

Yes, I do.

Yeah, yeah.

Like a mouse.

Cordless, obviously, but...

Have you ever hidden pornography in a long-haul flight?

No, I haven't.

And neither have I read it openly, either.

I could do this all afternoon, but one last thing is...

Do you still practice kissing on your hands?

Actually, no, I've never done that.

And perhaps that's why I'm genuinely regarded as a very poor kisser.

I'll never put the hours in practicing.

Okay, we'll have more of them next week.

Yeah, I'm looking forward to preparing these.

All right.

Right, I'm going to read an email that really made me laugh.

We've talked a lot about the shortest distance you've had to move house.

Oh, yes.

We've had so many mills on this.

That's our award-winning ten-month feature

that's the best idea anyone's ever had.

Well, we are blooming.

We are blooming.

Well, it is spring in our brain.

You said that last week.

This feature is going to run and run.

We've had dozens of emails on this,

and they already made me laugh,

but this one in particular, this is from Luke.

Do the content kings like that?

Yep.

Good three words, the content kings for this studio.

A decade ago, my wife and I once moved

approximately 100 yards in Balam, South West London.

Being a man, like many with far too much confidence in my physical prowess,

I decided I could handle the move without any transport.

The problem.

The move did to schedule the day after I was due to run the London marathon.

Marathon day arrived, and it was hot, seriously hot.

The run went okay, even if I was disappointed not to break the four-hour mark.

The most memorable moment from the run was when I reached my wife on mile 20,

when I inquired where she was sitting on the floor,

she said, because it's too hot to stand.

The irony passed her by.

Post rays, it became apparent I'd pretty bad heat stroke

going to the Holy Trinity,

the seating, a hairline,

a pinging of a ginger persuasion,

and running 42 kilometres in relentless heat.

That night I didn't sleep a wink as the exhaustion of the rays

plus heat stroke combined.

I've hallucinated a few times in my life,

but this was a biggie.

Fast forward to 6am the next day, move day.

I'm staggering the 100 metres done,

Bollum Hirode, carrying an undercount of French withdrawal.

Adding to all the stress, he's a waist-high,

and knee-high, under waist-covered, fridge guy.

Commuters, I'm suspiciously as my body reacted to the punishment I deflected on it

in the previous 24 hours.

I'd actually remember matching from that day, as I was deliriously out.

But after about nine trips, we have it nailed,

and I'd saved £100 on Van Haier, a great win.

What a little spontaneer you can get.

This answered quiz.

This puts into perspective the fact that I told Richard Herring

I couldn't do his podcast the day after the marathon

because I'd be in too much pain.

Oh, my goodness.

He has moved house.

In madness.

To save an answer to quiz.

Yeah.

Another take, this is from Alex.

A few years ago, I moved across the road,

and when I say across the road, I mean from number 81 to number 83.

Close enough that we could start the viewing

without having to get off our sofa.

That's good.

A few years previously, when my wife and I,

with the one-year-old baby, had moved the first time,

we'd done it all ourselves, resulting in a day that,

while technically, must have been 24 hours,

was in all reality closer to three weeks long.

Boxes of books were stored in a state-agent storm.

Clothes were stuffed into bin bags,

and a lute and van had a damaged tyre

repaired with mud and rainwater.

Don't tell the rental firm.

So learning from past horrors,

we hide a firm to do the remoodle for us.

Given the short distance, literally a stone's throw,

and quite a large stone at that,

I assume they would just carry the stuff over the road.

But no.

Partly because the move out begins prior

to receiving the keys for the new place,

and partly because their insurance terms dictated

they couldn't cross the road with moved items.

Fun fact.

They unpacked our house and loaded up their van.

What?

Then after partaking of a meal deal

from the supermarket at the end of the road,

they drove the van 15 feet to the other side of the road,

and unpacked it to the house they'd been looking at the entire day.

I obviously spent the day assuming

that the removal men thought I was a layabout

who couldn't be bothered to carry a TV

in a bookcase over the road.

But they were conscientious, diligent,

and no one had to pretend they hadn't ruined a vehicle

so they could get their deposit back.

Money well spent.

To answer the inevitable follow-up question,

we were moving from a flat to a house

and the street is very nice.

We still live there now,

but I have my eyes on number 84.

Oh, lovely.

Very nice.

I like this.

It's a very shorty meal.

Just back to that though.

So you couldn't just hire the men and women to do this?

I'm sure you could hire a handyman or handy woman,

or a handy person.

But I don't think if you're a removal firm,

your insurance will have so many stipulations

about what you're covered for and what you're not covered for.

So you might not be covered

for carrying things on, you know, across roads.

Yeah, yeah.

I think the record from Gordon is across the hall.

I have the winning answer,

where that this is not a competition.

Five years ago, me and my family moved home.

The door of our old flat was quite literally opposite

the door of our new flat.

So approximately one meter away.

Right, you don't need a van for that.

We moved on our finish in possessions

with the help of my brothers-in-law,

or brother-in-laws, or brothers-in-laws,

and two door stops and were finished by lunchtime,

and not the beside-brow raising anecdote.

But there you go, all the best, Gordon.

And then this is from Simon.

Very recently, listen, episode 5, 11 onwards.

But first time emailer,

conversation about people moving house just down the road

reminded me of when we moved house in the 80s when I was young.

We moved from number seven to number eight,

literally straight across the normal residential road.

A moving day, all the family came to help,

forming a chain of people to get it all shifted.

The move still talked about to this day,

not just because my sister was born on the same day,

but more the father, the garlic press,

was somehow lost in the middle.

LAUGHTER

Maybe I should have made a moving company after all.

Cheers, Simon.

Yeah.

Oh, it's a stressful day.

It's what you've got to do.

Do what you've got to do.

We'll be cutied out of our house in a box.

Yeah, yeah.

Never moving again.

Yeah. Because next door,

but one put their house on sale recently.

And Hannah's very much wants to buy next door, but what?

We do, we thought about it.

Why?

Because it's a bigger, better house.

Oh, right. Okay.

A bigger chapter.

So all the houses aren't like the same?

No, some of them have been extended,

and there actually are different,

there's different...

Different footprints.

But prints and layouts.

Yeah.

So we were tempted,

but it's prohibitively expensive.

So we do...

Yeah.

The bother.

Happy where we are.

Right, I've got another email.

This is based on something as he said.

Hello, my cathartic content, kings.

You've been treasured, companions.

I'm quite wonderful.

It vibe variable years.

I've danced with Dave.

I've howled with Jon,

and I've watched that video,

a bell is kicking a football into a child's groin,

more time to have charged my foe.

You consistently confess feelings

and expose vulnerabilities.

They make me feel like less of an oddball.

They're more confident in both halves of my experience,

the chosen,

and the completely uncontrolled.

Very much on brand.

in last Tuesday's episode, I heard the most relatable thing ever uttered under the EJJR banner,

but it wasn't from any of you. Sometimes, even if I think something is going to be wrong,

a small part of my brain just wants to go ahead and do it anyway. It was as you said that.

In one throwaway line, is he perfectly summarised the life of leaving my phone balance precariously

on rounded surfaces, making rush purchases, ignoring bad reviews, but one too many drinks,

the list goes on. Perhaps one day, I should be sufficiently

theorised to make these micro sabotages the focus of investigation, but if not,

is he's already shouted down a certain amount of self-criticism, thanks up the villa and keep

the fabulous nurse and John H. List and proud. Yeah, the the effort gene, which is he has.

So it's like when she scrapped the car, when she scrapped the old car, it was on a lump post.

Now, at that point, the first microsecond of scraping I hear, I stop and I try and work out

what to do so that I can minimise the damage. So if you know, if I if I if I'd missed time something

or you know, got my angles wrong and I hit, I'm going to stop. I'm going to try I'm going to turn

the wheel and reverse run so that I don't scratch a candy more. When is he to the old car? She was like,

I can't better keep going then.

Well, he's also panic, isn't it? I think just trying to quickly get out of the situation.

I wonder if it's a subconscious. You only get to scrape a brand new BMW once in your life.

But yeah, it's I don't think I have that effort gene.

Plenty of people that I know do. What's what's strange with this is that she's very,

very sensible usually and there's something like that will happen. You can just see her change.

That's interesting. Yeah, yeah. You say she's very, very sensible usually. She did push a

five litre pot of paint into a. Yeah, that's that's the effort gene. Is it? It's really weird. Yeah,

because I heard her day, she's constantly trying to make sure that we got babysitters arranged

for everything and that, you know, the it's all sorted with the children all that kind of thing.

And then eventually she'll get pushed and she'll be like, I'll fit.

Joe, can it's a little anxiety holiday? I don't know. She just actually in an emergency.

Let's go. Oh, three, four, you know, I only live once. Oh, it was funny, but I went, I went,

I went, I went, I went, stay night. I was me to my friends at seven. And I was I was walking

to where I was me to them. It's like 10 to seven. And she called me. She said, you've got

to go to TK Max in Hammersmith. And I said, why? I'm going to watch David Bern. He's on in an hour.

And she said, because I bought the World Book Day outfits, I thought I bought a bow and arrow,

but it's just the case. I've just bought a quiver. See, he took on a TK Max and buy an arrow now.

And I said, but I can't take an arrow into the Hammersmith Apollo. They told me that you take

rucksacks. They removed your bow and arrow at the door. I know. I said, the security's mounted the

Apollo. I'm not going to be looking up. And she said, no, I have worked it out. Go to the TK Max.

It's a six minute walk from the Apollo. You're not going to be late for the show. I know they

won't let you in. So just hide it and drabush because no one will be looking at drabush for a bow

and arrow. And then you can just, and then you can, you can retrieve it at the end of the show.

Well, three words to tell her what bush it was. I could have done. Yeah. So what happened?

Well, I went to TK Max. They didn't have a bow and arrow. Yeah, it's not placed to go.

Well, there's, there's a toy section. Oh, I see. I was going to see it. Yeah. So she checked,

there was a toy section TK Max. They had a lawn dart set, which I thought looked a bit like an arrow.

What are they going dressed as? Stefan, my son went to his clever little Freddy, a fox.

He could have gone as Eric Bristow. But as Eric Bristow got a book out.

He's got a book. Does it have to be out now? Not. Well, Eric Bristow is out now.

As long as the book exists. Yeah, I'm sure it'll be called like the Crafty Cockney.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's got it. It's called the Crafty Cockney.

Here we go. Let's my daughter went as the one who wins the Hunger Games. So in the end,

she had to make, so we had the bow, but the arrow, we just had the quiver, just the case for the

arrow. So she made one out of a stick. She found in the garden, and it's cardboard and a point.

So I, so I took all that. I said, there's no bow and arrow in TK Max Smith.

Unfortunately, I'm going to the kick now. Wow. But thank you to the literally hundreds of

listeners who were DMing me from six weeks ago saying, you've got to get a sorted man.

Okay. Well, should we end on an ask us anything? Yeah, sure.

I'm not going to ask us anything in a long time. So why don't we hit the bling jingle?

Oh, yes. Yeah.

Send you questions and answers. You'll surely get what you should say. What's the name of your very first pet?

It's ask us anything. Well, you can ask me anything.

Thanks. We will. We should get Izzy on to talk about the effort, Jean.

Oh, yeah. Because she's much more emotionally articulate than I am about it.

Because obviously I don't have it. Well, is this what makes you the perfect couple?

Because you don't have the effort, Jean. Not at all, no. But she has the prep gene.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So combined, you know, it sort of works. Yeah. So she's, you know,

she's booked babysitters for filming things. She's doing like three months in advance,

and she's very on it with that stuff. And then occasionally, when she's stressed and

the dashboard alert that says you've got someone sitting in the passenger seat,

but they haven't put their seatbelt on is beeping and going mad, rather than plug the paint in,

which is what I would have done. I'd have I'd have attached the seatbelt. She'll just tip the

paint off the floor and then fill my foot. Well, we're five feet. It's a two-lux.

She'd make a superb alcoholic. Why? Because she'd always have booze in the house.

Yeah. And in moments of real stress, she'd get absolutely hammered. Do you know what? I'll tell

of that. It's something to say. Ask a thing, Rick. Got in touch too. Ask a thing.

John was recently talking about impressing women by taking two steps at a time at the tube station.

It got me thinking if both of you met a lovely lady in a bar when you were younger and you were

both single and both took a shine to her. How would you impress her and win over her affections?

What would be the... What? The two of us are at the same time.

Yeah, I see. What would you be competing? Yes, absolutely.

Like Top Gun. I smell it. Oh, that's very cool.

Okay, well, maybe take the competition out of it, then maybe just what was what was your go-to?

Was there a part of your personality or a thing that you would do to impress a lady?

Now I'd probably just do a sprint. Yeah. Take it to the nearest race track.

The nearest athletic center. And say, just stand at the end and get a stopwatch from somewhere.

And time this. Exactly. I'd probably do a sprint.

I just, in all honesty, I just try to make people laugh. Yeah.

Regardless of gender. Yeah, absolutely. Nothing wrong with that.

Yeah, I was just trying to be the funny one, which was less successful than you would imagine.

Yeah. John was a sort of brooding heathcliff character.

Yeah. Heathcliff with a Mohican.

Yeah, and now heathcliff.

Heathcliff from mothering heights, not the cartoon cut.

I should say. Me and Robin, I mean, weirdly, having a Mohican when you were...

I was sort of between the ages of 16 and 20.

Yeah.

It is a bit like being seven foot tall in that...

Everyone notices.

Yeah, everyone looks at you.

So if you go into a nightclub like an indie night and there's 500 girls there and 500 boys there.

Is peacocking, in a way?

Well, yeah, everyone sees the guy who looks mad and ill.

Like, I can't...

I can't believe you're doing taxi drivers.

Yeah.

And if only 1% of those people who attracted the guy looks mad and ill and now angry,

yeah, that's five people.

Whereas if you just look like, you know, everyone else.

I was trying to just look nice.

Yeah, I was.

So you had to make him for four years.

Yeah, he got thinner and thinner over time.

Yeah.

Also, me and Robin used to do this thing, which I was thinking about yesterday,

where when we would go to the tecler,

oh man, what days?

It was indie night the tecler.

I still like the tecler.

Was every...

It's on the boat.

Yeah, it was every Friday or Saturday, it was called popcorn.

And this guy Fat Paul with DJ.

And it would pretty much be the same songs every week.

But he would play...

I'm often the same people in my experience.

There was a one in Clubby for Bach.

Yeah.

Which is the same.

So he would play the...

Pop scene on a Wednesday night.

Brilliant.

What's that rolling stone's cover,

but done by a soul band that you really like?

Oh, God, there's a version of satisfaction.

Yeah, it'd be like that, but done by the vandal,

on the...

The velvet lips.

Yeah.

So he'd play that sort of thing.

He'd also play a bit of Captain B fart,

but basically, we'd get there at like half 10.

Yeah.

Because people at the bar, no one's dancing.

Me and Robin would go into the middle of the dance floor

and do especially devised interpersonal dance with each other,

where we'd sort of...

We'd get our arms.

We'd stand opposite each other,

like facing each other.

And we'd go like this,

but through the gaps in each other's bodies.

That's a good one.

If you went wrong, if you went wrong, did you hit each other?

That didn't really happen.

But you'd sort of be moving around in the dance,

and we'd do that for a song.

And I don't know, that was sort of our way of announcing ourselves

to the night club.

I don't know if it ever worked,

but again, everyone sees those two guys.

Everyone's seeing it.

Sure.

Who escaped from the wall.

Is anyone being rude by it?

The Madill guys got a dancing partner.

So, yeah, that was...

Well, you know, just chuckles.

This one from Roberto leads on from that quite nicely, actually,

as another ask us anything.

Love making tips.

Not... we're not quite at love making tips,

but do send them in.

Do like a candle.

Do put the heating on.

I think my fashion sense is that an all-time high at the moment,

and looking back,

can definitely think of times when it was really bad.

When do you think you are at your most fashionable,

and your least fashionable,

and please describe some of the outfits

that would reference that?

Least fashionable.

I would say about 13.

Would you?

Because I was just desperate to imply

that I was ready to play sport at any time.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So there was sort of all...

That was fashionable.

That was so much umbral.

Yeah.

And also, when I was 13, I was very, very small.

So it was almost in posse...

All the clothes that the cool lads wore were too big for me.

Yeah.

And they wouldn't...

Because the cool lads were wearing adult sizes,

but they had even a small men's shirt

when I was 13, was so vast.

Yeah.

It just looked absurd.

So I just had to sort of stick to like football tops

and um...

and tracksuit bottoms and things.

I mean, it wasn't a great look, really.

The 13 is like, that's harsh to expect a 13-year-old to be fashionable.

Yeah, yeah.

But in relation to your peers, though.

Right.

So like, there were lads in my year at school of my age.

No, I thought, he looks good.

I don't look like that.

I look like I'm constantly ready to play five or something.

Tell you what, I struggled with shoes

for a long time until I found converse.

Yeah.

And then it was like, oh, I'd never have to think about this again.

But also, unless you went to an Indian night,

you had to wear basically your school shoes

to go to the night club.

I didn't go to those sorts of night.

I maybe went three or four times to go sorts of things.

Oh, they were often in wheels that were the only places

which was a pain.

Then I had to get rid of converse

because it made my toe painful.

Yeah.

Then I guess, well, there was my purple dog mount in phase

when I was 13, 14, where I wore purple dogs to school

in school uniform days.

Oh, I know, cool.

Like, I absolute dogs abuse.

I wore dogs to school uniform with black ones

because I would have, I would have been sent home

in, if I'd been wearing purple dogs one,

my school's very hot on uniform.

I was thinking, I mean, I've never really been that bothered

so I wouldn't know so much.

I went through a phase, do you remember that leather jacket I had?

Yeah, yeah.

That was quite a thin leather jacket

when we started radioing.

I feel good in that.

Every girl who's ever seen a photo of me in that says,

no way, Vito, are you ever wearing anything like that ever again?

And I thought it looked quite cool.

I had two of them in fact.

Did you?

Well, I replaced it because it wore out.

I thought it was such a good like everyday jacket.

I don't think I'd wear leather now.

Another thing I remembered yesterday, this morning actually,

because I was thinking about the 90s

because I'm going on Miranda Sawyer's podcast.

Oh, I quite jealous of that

because I think Miranda Sawyer's brilliant.

She said, will you come on to talk about your mad taste in music?

Is that what she said?

Yeah, because my 90s start with Freddie Mercury

and end with Godspeed you black and white.

Tell her I would love to do her podcast

because I genuinely would love to do that.

And Miranda remarked that she thought you were too big for that matter.

That's right, that's too bad.

Dave, he's been on QI.

He's been on QI twice.

Although it won't go out until the end of the year, probably.

Really?

Yeah, I'm a QI guy.

You are, well done.

But when me and Robin would have been maybe,

he would have been 18, I would have been 17.

We went to something very cool,

the incredible Walt Blighthouse party,

which was Orteca,

plaid, maybe boards of Canada.

Yeah, yeah.

It was Chris Morris' label.

Oh, wow.

And they did this basically sort of rave

on right near the Millennium Dome.

Well, it's only Greenwich.

Yeah.

And we got the coach from Bristol.

And you got the coach stick.

That's the coolest thing you've ever done.

It is the coolest thing.

The only cool thing you've ever done.

But so you got the coach and they had little,

there were little secret signs on lampposts with our own,

that you just had to follow until you got that.

And this is pre-mobiles and stuff.

So there's no Google maps.

And we got there.

And it was just these sort of three warehouses

and a big sort of communal yard,

playing with all these bands playing.

It was so cool.

But I was wearing,

I think I was wearing a yellow Calvin Klein shirt,

because I had yet to make the move

from sort of 15-year-old school.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

So I remember I didn't have a coat.

And I didn't realize it was going to be so cold,

so there was no heating.

So I got runners nipple really badly

in my yellow Calvin Klein shirt.

I just must have looked so out of place.

I looked like I should have been

in one of those nightclubs.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I was just talking about it,

but I was at the coolest gig of the decade.

It was hard for me to find clothes

when I was a teenager because I was sort of thin.

Like when I was 18, I weighed about eight and a half

still, something fitted properly

until I started buying band t-shirts,

which they saw in very small sizes.

So that helped me out a bit.

That's the thing with Queen t-shirt and black jeans.

Is that what you, you know,

you're never, no one's going to say

that's really fashionable.

Has it been to Paris Fashion Week?

But you never look mad.

You never getting it wrong.

You never really getting it right.

But you're in the middle.

Yeah, you're getting it right in the moral sense.

But like band t-shirt and jeans.

Yeah, you're safe.

It's 70s, 80s, 90s,

10s, 20s.

You make sense in a way.

Yeah, there's always a reference point to it.

I need to tell the people what you like.

Oh, big time.

I'm talking shit, it's only people where you've been.

I'm going to end their phase.

And the trousers just get tighter and looser, tighter and looser.

Yes, that's a tighter thing, yeah.

Great.

Thank you.

We should wrap.

We should wrap up.

Yes, very good.

The bureau will be on BBC sounds.

Yes, tomorrow.

Exclusive, but not exclusively.

But exclusively, but not exclusive.

You say only on only on BBC sounds.

And then with that Tuesday, won't we, of course?

Yeah, back Tuesday, everyone.

See ya.

Bye.