724 - Garrett Trapnell - part two

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You ready, beeftits?

You're listening to the dollop this is an American history podcast or each week,

I, Dave Anthony, read a story from American history to a clown.

Yeah, with Reynolds, who has no idea what the topic is going to be about.

To those of those who are tuning in for the first time, I'm not a clown.

We have a lot of fun here.

Listen, go dolloppodcast.com.

We're going on tour.

Same old van, not a new van.

So close to a new van.

That was crazy.

You don't even know, and we blame Matt Farah.

Yeah, definitely blame Matt.

Don't go get drunk at Matt's house, send your home in a waymo.

And then he'll catch you on a wild goose chase trying to get a sprinter van.

He's from the Burning oven podcast.

Burning oven.

Isn't that the podcast he's on?

No, rubber.

Tires, smoking tires oven, smoking tires, burning oven.

We'll check, we'll have Jamie check that, but I'm pretty sure.

Did you see the anytime people get near, like,

billionaires or Epstein, he'll be like, ah, we get.

We'll be like, yeah, so weird.

All right, this is part two of Garrett Trappinol.

Part two.

It's been two weeks since we did part one, so we'll see how much

Garrett's remembers.

Can you sing that like the bear naked ladies?

No, I can't sing.

Yeah, it's been two weeks in part one.

Sometimes I am concerned about what happens in your head.

Other times it's like great and funny, but then there are definitely times where I'm like,

man, this guy's trapped, he's trapped in his own head and it's got to go.

I went to a llama farm in Portland and I deaf, like, the woman who they were great,

this woman, they're like, she does these airport therapy lovers.

But by the time I left that farm, that woman's mother was like, what's wrong with you?

Well, you did send me a video of you tongue kissing a llama baby llama for a good 30 seconds.

Not a baby. That was a adult female.

Are you shitting me?

No, that was a baby.

Oh, all right, it was a baby.

You were doing Epstein, Nile and Lama shit.

I bribed it in my mouth with carrots.

1969.

Yeah, 69.

Gary, we're called Gary.

Gary Trapnel was on the move again after escaping from another mental institution.

Okay.

He landed in Los Angeles and now assumed the identity of James W. Stewart, an army captain.

This is Jimmy Stewart.

This is Jimmy Stewart.

Well, wait a minute, I guess I've always been bitten by that.

But he's been even waiting to do that forever.

I didn't even know I really had a dream.

Yeah, sure he didn't.

He probably like on the house doing that one.

Well, some day it'll come up on the podcast.

I'll be able to crowbar it in.

Uh, who medically retired and was returning.

I've been medically retiring.

That was, I was in Vietnam.

The memory's on me.

He moved into an apartment in the valley.

Someone dropped a phone book.

I think it's a gun.

Now I live in the valley.

There's the whole episode now.

I never want anything to stop more.

Now wait a minute, third day.

Here we go.

A whole lot of minutes there.

That includes Vietnam.

Oh, I still hear the gunshots.

I saw some of my best friends go.

God damn it.

Oh, one of them was a rabbit.

I'm just going to leave.

Why?

Well, well, well, well, if you're going to leave,

then I'll tell you what, I'm going to leave too.

Okay.

Don't stop following me.

Well, where are you going?

Not where you are.

I was a pretty big car.

I always make cars as big where you're from.

What are you doing?

What does that even mean?

What just happened in this time?

He's in your time.

So he's following you to your car now.

They're cars are big also.

Well, well, they're just so compact.

No, they're not.

Well, now they are.

They were big back then.

No, too big.

Now they've taken...

We're talking about 1969 right now.

What are you talking about?

Why don't you yell at me?

It takes me right back to my platoon.

I don't like them, I'm right.

Damn it.

So then he met Susan.

He fell in love with her and he married her.

As James Stewart.

Yes.

Always a good move.

Classic dollop trope.

So he got a job selling cleaning chemicals to an army base.

Sure.

And he settled down.

He settled down.

He's like a regular work and gel with a wife.

Yeah.

He was going to be married to normal guy now.

He even came clean to Susan about everything he had done.

Everything?

Everything.

But she's too in love with him to care.

What a relief that must have been.

He's changed now.

Yeah, right?

Yes.

To unburden yourself and be like,

she's sticking around.

I mean, he's done multiple crimes

and in and out of mentalisticians.

Like, his history is like,

that's okay.

I love you.

That's great.

But Garrett is Garrett.

And eventually, as always,

he got paranoid and restless.

It's only so long he can do this.

It's a sap, but this is the cycle.

Yeah, so it happens.

Yeah.

He started writing bad checks.

And soon he had

$600,000 in today's money,

most from conning big grocery store chains.

How much money?

600,000 in today's money.

Wow.

So he's just,

because people probably don't know how it worked back then.

But back then, that's how you got cash was you would

go to the grocery store,

write a check for over the amount.

Sometimes you would just go to the grocery store

and write a check and go,

can I get $50 and they'd give it to you?

It's like, it's really hard to go

to even think back to when that worked,

how that worked for so long.

Well, because, because,

because crying, you were like,

I'm not going to do crying.

Well, part of it was,

you're part of a society and as a store,

you want regular customers.

And if you do, it can be in things for them.

So, and they just don't expect like,

a lot of people to come in and do that.

And a lot of people won't.

How does it work?

Or most people aren't used to make.

Does he have to show ID with the check?

Yeah.

So he's just got a fake,

what's he, how's he?

Like a fake ID.

Yeah, fake ID and fake check of the grocery store.

He's like, man,

yeah, that's fine.

Well, but that's that's all you had.

Right.

There's no other way to do it back then.

You look at the ID.

Is he like first?

He's first.

No, no people have been doing checks.

Right.

Check.

But he made over 600 grand doing this.

Well, yeah, but I think most people

wouldn't take it to this level.

So this is extraordinary.

I mean, though, like,

the most people would be like $50 and he'd scam or whatever.

Yeah.

So he's going nuts.

Like, yeah, just these tomatoes and then 50 grand.

They're crazy.

So how much is that?

$50,000 and $4.

And you know what?

Actually, just keep the tomatoes.

You know, it's fine.

I actually don't need them.

And then he gets in a car and heads east.

The thing is that it's the rush.

He likes the rush.

He does like the rush because it's all about.

It's all about what you kind of become calm.

Then the, you know,

he wants the, he wants the adrenaline again.

Yeah, it's about the juice.

Yeah, yeah.

So he needs a woman who accepts him for him.

I mean, obviously he's under a fake name,

but she accepts him.

All that.

And even that, that's not good enough.

No.

Right.

He needs it to be on the ropes.

And he, the rush is also like the rush of like falling in love with the woman.

Yeah.

And then it's another rush, another rush.

So first thing he does when he heads east is to go and spring George Padea

from the mental institution.

His boy.

And this is how they did it.

So Garrett waits outside in a car during a shift change.

And I remember George is a really big guy.

Right.

So George just runs through and plows through everyone when the doors are open

and just runs and jumps in the car.

Perfect.

That's it.

He just does like a football.

He, they are benefiting a lot from being first again.

Man, this is the thing.

Nobody thought of that.

Yeah, people were like, well, and then we'll chip.

Whoa, did he just run with the fuck?

Wait, you can just run out of here.

Holy shit.

I don't know, man.

Could coolate his way out of this event.

So he's just got 600 grand in grocery store ripoff cash and that his friend just ran.

It's well, now we might need a wall.

This is crazy.

It's always a bad sign when the the mental patient puts on a football helmet.

Yeah, he's Geronimo.

So yeah, he's a football player.

He's a, he's a guy.

He's like, from one from Lukaku's net.

Kugus net.

He's like that, that size.

So yeah, when you really call a madden's worth.

That's right.

Then they take a boat to upstate New York.

Great.

Where they had a great time for a few weeks.

Until George has, I'm sorry, Garrett has an idea.

Prove to himself that he could do more than just write phony checks and knock off gas stations.

It's not about the money.

It wants to take it up a level.

Yeah, rob a bank.

Yep.

greedy.

Because if you are this type of criminal, you always need to push it, right?

Even though George is, it's really, and I'm not even being a jerk off,

it is how you get Epstein.

It's people who are like, boy, we need the next fix.

Yeah, yeah.

So even though George is a dumbass and almost got them caught,

they successfully robbed a bank in Montreal and got back across the border into the US.

Great.

A couple months later, Garrett's good luck finally came to an end and he was caught.

Garrett was sent by the state of New York to a Canadian prison.

And he spent a lot of time in the library trying to figure out some angle to get free and

sure enough.

He wouldn't said I could go.

Oh, yeah, you promised that he said that to you?

All right.

Yeah.

There you go then.

Okay, I'll see you later, fellas.

All right.

All right, thank you.

What a nice guy.

I can't believe the word and let that guy go.

The word and what?

He didn't know.

Well, nobody's ever pulled that shenanigan before.

Oh, Canadians.

Sweet Canadians.

He learned it's technically illegal for an individual state

to deal directly with a foreign country.

The federal government has to do it.

So the Canadian right.

So he got a Republican.

The American.

Okay, I say right.

So against the Republican Center to make a really big deal

out of it and taking always the Republican

rub and taking Democratic New York representatives to task for, quote,

abusing an American national.

How dare you?

That's a good boy.

How dare you have broken and then cut to the Republican Party now?

Sure, whatever you want.

When he was being transferred to a prison in the States,

he was put on a plane back to New York where the FBI was waiting.

But in what it's just like a

luck, pure magical luck,

there was intense fog stradding the airport

and the pilot lands at the wrong gate.

So there's no FBI agents at the gate.

And he just jumps onto the first flight out of JFK before they could nab it.

Oh, my God.

And within five minutes, he's headed to St. Louis.

That's awesome.

It sucks about St. Louis, but everything else is great.

That is great, isn't it?

Yeah, the luck of just like, oh, shit.

What's the next flight?

Well, we'll be going to St. Louis at 645.

You have one, please.

Yeah, now go.

Sam, a criminal on the run, and I want to be on the next plane out of this airport.

Which, which, and I'm not, I'm not.

I'm just like hypothetically.

Well, it'd be St. Louis, but we're going to need to get a check.

Do you want any cash back with that?

Yeah, I'm just going to actually, I'm going to leave this blank for you guys.

Sure.

Yeah, and go ahead and fill out whatever you want.

We have as $40,000.

There you go.

All right, thank you.

Well, thanks so much.

Can I get cash more cash back?

Absolutely.

You can take whatever you want.

Everyone's an idiot in this time.

Okay.

None of this has ever been done before.

And you know what?

You keep the tomatoes.

Oh, great.

No problem.

Thank you.

So he reconnects with Susan, but she, she'd been waiting for Melissa.

I'm going through hell.

She was alienated and kicked out of the house by Garrett's drunk mother.

She was sexually assaulted by a cop.

And once the reunited things, they're not the same.

But they do love each other, but it's not what it was.

It's fucking incredible for this guy to be able to still be, you know what I mean?

I'm going to show up after all this and still be like,

Hey, babe.

Well, she let me fuck her.

They headed back and forth across the country where Garrett tried to return Susan to her mother.

So she didn't get like caught up in the crime stuff that he's doing.

Oh, okay.

How old is Susan?

I don't know.

Okay, but she's like a grown up.

Yeah, she knows.

I can just live on my own.

It's important that I return you to your mom.

You're what we call a go back.

You're going to go back to your mom and 34.

Okay.

Mrs. Anderson's your daughter.

She needs to be safe here.

I'm bad news.

Uh, Susan refuses to let him.

She's like with him no matter what.

Right.

Now go on.

Get out of here.

No, nobody needs you.

There's no reason for him to be here, right?

Well, no, I'm stoked.

God, it doesn't make any sense.

Well, God, nobody needs you.

Move.

Not yet.

Well, you're still sticking around, huh?

Well, maybe this is something.

Jesus Christ.

Trying to do, right?

Where are you going?

Trying to do, trying to do right by her.

He had an obvious ideal for, for, for real business

that would set them straight.

So we're going straight.

Something good.

Move to Baltimore.

Perfect start and start a farm.

Yes, perfect area for a farm.

Raising German shepherds.

Oh, good.

Yeah, no, and definitely go to Baltimore

and start a dog farm.

To rent out a security dog.

Yeah.

So new plan.

Maybe this is the cocaine talking,

but we're going to move to Baltimore,

known for its ubiquitous farmland.

And we're going to raise German shepherds

and rent them out to security firms.

Okay.

All right.

Hell yeah.

I love you.

I remember when you had the cleaning business

where you sent sold cleaning supplies.

Yeah, straight and narrow.

We're going to grow dogs.

Oh, okay.

People usually don't say grow dogs.

German shepherds.

Okay.

Security dogs.

Okay.

And we're going to rent them to who?

Security firms.

Don't they already have them?

They'll need more.

But why would they rent them?

Because they don't want to buy them.

So we will rent them.

And at the end of the day,

they will return them to us.

At the end of the day?

Or a weekend or, no, month.

I don't know, I don't know.

I'm open to pitching.

But what I am locked into

is Baltimore Farm German dogs.

And the rental.

I think that's a very good start.

It seems not.

They'd rent them for a week.

We'd do them by the week.

And then when they'd like them,

they'd buy them and we'd keep them more dogs coming.

Yes.

Everybody likes it.

Hands in.

Garrett?

Yeah.

Are you on cocaine?

Yes.

I am on a lot of cocaine.

But that's why the idea is working a lot.

It's not working.

Do more coke.

Catch up with me.

And we'll pull little saddles on them.

And monkeys can ride them with guns.

Security firms alike them.

Why would anybody want that?

Because then they have extra protection.

The future is monkeys with guns on the back of German

shepherds that we grow in Baltimore in farmland.

But would monkeys just shoot anybody?

Yeah.

No, you're right.

Well, we'll need to swap the monkey brains.

What?

With children brains.

We will put the brains of baby children in there.

Yes.

Everybody likes it.

Hands in.

Where did the monkey brains go?

We don't make a man too.

We're soup.

Come on.

We'll make a man too.

We're soup.

I like the song.

Hell yeah.

Making a man too.

We're soup.

Are we bad?

We got a monkey brain soup.

Did we just start a band?

I'm pretty sure we did.

Uh, sharks.

My business is called German shepherds security dogs

with child-brained monkeys with pistols on their backs.

Wait, why did you say...

This is a rental idea.

Why did you say sharks?

What?

He said sharks.

Shark tank.

Here he goes.

I thought you were going to red sharks also.

It's not a bad pitch.

From water security.

The question is how do we get gills on a monkey?

And the answer is razor blades.

In less than two months, the business was almost defunct.

God damn it.

I don't know where we turned it wrong.

It was such a good idea.

Every part of this was airtight perfect.

But lucky for them,

Martin Luther King,

Jr. was assassinated by the FBI and Ridescript the country.

No, that's not the official story.

But let's be honest.

Good news.

Let's be honest.

Civil rights leader.

Martin Luther King, Jr. was killed.

So the German shepherds security dog business looks great again.

Yes, security, demand for security.

German shepherds dogs skyrocketed.

God.

Overnight their business became a complete success.

Just unbelievably stupid.

This made Garrett feel kind of gross.

So he used his new wealth to bring young black kids from the ghetto

up to the farm to ride horses swam play with the puppies.

Welcome to guilty pastures.

Here are guilty pastures.

Black children can ride horses for free.

No reason.

Welcome to camp.

I feel bad.

Unfortunately, the wealthy white neighbors

didn't appreciate seeing young black men so close to their states.

Look, I'm trying to bridge a lot of gaps here.

So I need the black kids to come up here to ride the horses

because the assassination of civil rights icon Martin Luther King, Jr.

made my German shepherds dog.

So we're with you up until the black kids come here

and then we're not on the same page anymore.

We're very upset about Martin Luther King.

I think we all are, but I think that at the same time

I'm renting German shepherds to attack.

At the same time in black people.

So I'm trying to give that by calling black children.

No, I don't think will the dogs be eating the black children?

No, no.

The children are here to sort of just cleanse my style of business.

Yeah, we have a different idea for the word cleanse.

Jesus Christ.

I mean, you know what's fucking nuts is talking to someone who I think is crazy.

You know what?

I'm just going to throw this out there.

The HOA doesn't allow it.

So thank you.

I've been growing German shepherds.

Well, first of all, no one says grow when they talk about dogs.

What do you call it when two dogs fuck?

Growing next.

Next question.

So the neighbors called the cops.

And Garrett defied them for a month.

There is no better business to defy the police

than a German shepherds security dog business.

How about this?

I'll just let my dogs go.

Well, one morning he woke up to find that four of his dogs have been killed by a sniper.

Christ.

Well, I mean, this is the game.

My way, kid snipers start to have some moral fibers.

They're just pretty much set and forget.

Now would be a good time.

He packed up and headed back with the now pregnant Susan to California this time.

So she left Francisco.

Okay.

So he's got a...

I like how they weren't working out.

So they just decided to tour the country and, you know, have a family.

Well, now they're going to live in the barrier.

Normal, domestic, married couple now.

No, no, this is going to last.

This is going to last.

He's going to get the...

This time, we're going to hang in there.

I need to rob a blimp.

It worked for a few months.

But the paranoia returned.

He feared FBI goons would show up at his door at any minute.

And when Susan had a pregnancy complication, he saw it as a bad omen and sent her to L.A.

and he ran off to Shreveport, Louisiana.

Oh, God.

I just came back from the doctor.

There's something wrong with the baby.

You need to go to Los Angeles.

And here's what I'm thinking.

I'm going to go fish.

I'm going to go to Shreveport.

What?

But now that I need you now,

I get close to the crawfish.

Look, this is it.

You got a devil in your womb.

I'm going to forest gump.

The only way you idiot.

He went to Shreveport, Louisiana, because that's a place he had never been.

There's a lot of those.

Susan gave birth to Garrett Jr.

Now, Garrett very much wanted to be there to meet the baby.

Unfortunately, he couldn't because the FBI was actually there at the hospital waiting.

Oh, they weren't.

They really were.

So he's right.

He was paranoid, but also they were there.

Right.

Garrett's plan was to go to a new plan is to go to Mexico City,

get settled, and then eventually bring down Susan and Jr.

once he's got everything set up.

Sure.

But on the flight there, he fell asleep

and woke up in Dallas with guns pointed at his head.

Was that the connection flight or what?

I think that's the connection.

He eventually ended up in an LA courtroom to answer for all of his crimes.

Dozens of theft and fraud charges.

But Garrett has a trick up his sleeve.

Well, my name's Jimmy Stoward.

The only thing that could get him out of this, Greg Ross.

Who?

Greg Ross.

An attorney.

He would use Greg to fool psychologists

in quote, to quote, believing that he was a genuine Dr.

Jackal, Mr. Hyde.

Normally, a sane honest man whose mind every so often was taken over by a sinister

alter ego named Greg Ross.

Now, look, most times I'm pretty good, but then

sometimes a night I turn into Greg Ross.

Evil, Gregg is a very strong criminal.

Why is he Jimmy Stoward?

Because that's like, because you gave me a hacky premise.

Now, I can keep beating it, Dad.

You know what I'm saying?

But a courtroom appeal to their wiser censorship.

So Greg Ross was the Mr. Hyde that comes out to commit the crimes and only the crimes

and then Greg goes away.

Right.

After the crimes, he just wakes up.

He's like, that's so much money.

How do I get here with all this cash?

Greg.

No, Greg.

I got 40 German shepherds in money.

Oh, God.

What did Greg do?

This is like quantum leaping.

Oh, no.

What have I done?

So Garrett works the psychologist through a masterful bout of manipulation.

And he doesn't.

He made his shrink believe that the entire crime

binge had been a burst of a psychoprenic mental illness.

And then he was now totally okay.

The good news, Doc.

I figured it out.

I just have to stop allowing him into my body.

The other Greg.

Absolutely.

And do you know how you can do that?

I've just completely stopped it.

Okay.

Yeah, I just said no more.

Well, congratulations.

Thank you.

You're free to go.

Well, there is one thing.

Sometimes at night, I am taken over by another personality.

Who's that?

Stop!

A little guy comes out to play.

What a wonderful life indeed.

So now there's the three of us.

There's me, evil Greg.

What?

I don't feel good about any of it either.

It's very obvious I shouldn't have read that name.

Come on.

It's been fun.

It's good.

It's like when I found out I had an Elmo.

Elmo was amazing.

Thank you.

Garrett was found not guilty on all charges

and strolled out of the courtroom a free man.

Wow.

Garrett, the dollop is brought to you by Pestee.

We have a back room, right?

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He settled down with Susan and Junior, but soon enough, as always.

Greg.

Got the itch.

Greg.

Ready to go, baby.

He saw the dog to a gorgeous showgirl slash topless go-go dancer,

slash hustler named Kathleen.

Well, goodbye.

And became obsessed with the idea of hustling the hustler.

Oh, interesting.

I thought he was going to love the topless thing.

He leaves Susan, who is pregnant again.

Again, promising her that it was just a financial situation

that he would be back for her and the kids soon.

So he's like, I'm going to go off with this hot broad.

I'm not.

I'm coming her.

But I'm taking all of her money.

I'm going to come.

Honey, it's great.

Yeah, I'm fucking doing a lot of stuff.

But I don't want to.

Why don't you just stay here with your with with Garrett Jr.

And the new child.

So when a hustler meets a hustler.

Why don't you hustle?

I got to hustle the hustlers.

There's other hustlers that aren't like.

There's a rule.

There's a rule.

If you find me come across a hustler with a great rack,

you got a hustler out of their pants.

I mean, she's like, okay.

I got to go fuck her to get her money.

You got to stand.

I got to fuck the money out of her.

You know, I understand.

He drags going to fuck her.

So he tucks Kathleen into a loping with him to Vegas

where he got her so drunk that he was able to convince her

that they had gotten married.

Is that that's like that's like shitty hustling?

Yeah.

Yeah, we got married and I now get all your shit.

Hey, hey, then he vanished on her with her credit cards,

her power of attorney and some cash.

So he was really doing it.

Yeah, he did it.

And then he used one of her credit cards to rent a plane

and fly to the Bahamas.

Hey, are you coming home soon?

There's a new part of the plan I didn't tell you about.

I bought a plane and I'm going to the Bahamas for a little while.

Wait, why?

I love you.

And it's just all part of this whole thing I'm working on right now.

This whole thing got a little crazy on me, okay, hon?

Hey, how are the kids?

No one out?

Yes.

Yeah, cool weeks ago.

Ah, hell yeah.

They got this punch up here that is so good.

So anyway, yeah, I fake a look to that lady.

I got her money.

Now I'm in the Bahamas because I bought a plane.

I'm really excited to come home and see you again and meet that new one.

All right, hon.

I love you.

Stay back.

Stay back.

We're in poverty.

All right, take care.

You don't love this plane.

By the way, I met a woman up here.

I got to take her money.

I'm a marry or maybe.

Bye bye, bye, bye.

We eat mostly beans.

I'm hanging up.

Okay.

In the Caribbean, he met another dashing young con man.

God man, okay.

Roger Peterson.

And they partner.

And so they're basically fucking their way through the island's lady tourists.

Sure.

And then in a jewelry store where Garrett was buying some jewels for his actual wife

on his fake wife's credit card.

Can I just be honest?

Yeah, go ahead.

It is nice that he actually likes this first wife still.

He does.

A little bit occupant.

I mean, like, yeah, he could have totally bailed.

I mean, yeah, he could have been a con,

but clearly he's like out of his tits,

but he is basically like,

oh, man, I'm going to get Susan something nice from here.

Hey, woman's last time he talked to him.

He's been months.

So he uses fake wife's credit card to buy his real life.

Some jewels.

But the shop owner refused him.

She's like, she's sent to something is off, right?

It's her deal.

I don't know.

What's off?

I mean, I don't know the name one thing this guy did that was weird.

Now he takes this as just the most horrible offense.

Yeah, it's clutching pearls.

She didn't let him have.

And possibly decided that he couldn't buy the jewels.

So he's just going to take him.

He can't buy him.

Take him.

Sloppy crime.

He wants he's for his wife.

Sloppy crime.

So he walked into the store with his gun out

and calmly had the shopkeeper, Philip, a bag.

See, this is sloppy.

This is how you do it.

Most of his other things are longer comments.

This is how you do it.

Except for the grocery store stuff and breaking out his friend

and a bunch of stuff before that.

But still, he had to love crime.

The country robbing gas stations.

Yeah, yeah.

Okay, but I feel like he graduated is something new when he

alloped with that lady.

He was bank robbing in Canada like in the series of banks.

I'm saying he's gotten better.

Why is he resorting to this?

He escaped from the cops by hopping

in his partner's running car and speeding straight to a plane

and took off as the cops arrived at the tarmac.

His plane, the plane he rented.

Right.

Awesome.

He evaded the FBI and Miami police by performing a daring landing

on an abandoned airstrip literally under the radar.

Hell yeah.

And they hopped in a cab and took it all the way to Orlando,

which why would you ever go to Orlando?

Literally the worst thing I've seen going there.

It's the worst thing.

Nobody's going there.

No, there's worse ones.

I just so disagree.

Orlando's trash, but

Orlando's like, what if meth was a city?

I mean, Florida's if meth was a state, there's a lot of stuff.

But the rest of Florida isn't in the middle.

At least the rest of Florida has like, oh, well, there's ocean.

Well, there are parts of Florida that I'm okay with.

There are, but the Orlando, you're right, it's trash.

Then he got on multiple flights and ended up back in LA

where they fenced the hall for around $20,000 each and kept the best jewels for themselves.

Wow.

That's a good, that's a good little room.

I mean, he's got a wife and two kids in Mexico.

No, I think they're in LA.

They're in LA.

Okay.

Now, over the next two weeks, Garrett went back to Nassau,

posing as a film producer to get girls onto a rented yacht.

Okay.

Well, what are you going to do?

I mean, this is what you do.

He was in the Bahamas.

He sees yachts.

He's like, I should be on a yacht with girls.

Why?

Just because he wants to be with girls.

Yes.

What would you do?

I mean, I'd probably tell the woman that I was with, that hey,

I think maybe you should move on with your life

because I'm going to be a real anchor for your heart.

That's insane.

Honey, I got to go on a boat and convince him I'm a film producer for money.

So he, he captains the yacht through a deadly storm.

He seduced girls.

When we just get to go in the harbor, everyone, hold on tight.

He seduced a young Southern debut taunt.

He compared himself to Captain Bligh when captaining the yacht.

I'm a lot like Captain Bligh.

I've done that.

I'm like Captain Bligh.

That's what you do when you're captaining your boat.

I'm very much a Captain Bligh type.

It just like the way he would compare himself to Charles Lindbergh when he was flying.

Right.

He ended up being caught again on the island for using a bogus credit card,

and he barely escaped by posing as a doctor with an emergency clienty

and to get back to the states to treat.

There's no doctors near where my patient is.

That's truly just the most insane.

Excuse me.

Out of the way, I'm a doctor.

I have to get home and...

You can't arrest me.

There's a man whose kidney is coming out.

I have to take out one of my patient's gallbladders at once.

He ends up marrying the debut taunt.

Now, he did that because he wants to hide out from the feds

and he's going to do it by being in the world of Southern aristocracy.

I hate good news.

I think I'm actually safe for a minute.

I had to make some really, really quick adjustments.

I've been crushing, by the way.

Okay, Grant, so how can you send some money?

Well, please reading beans.

I will soon share.

My new wife is...

I'm sorry.

I want me to show you.

Wait, what?

The Vegas girl?

Vegas girl.

Who's that?

The girl who you took her credit cards.

You said the girl was in the office.

That was a fake alope.

That was a fake alope.

You didn't marry her?

I don't think I don't remember.

I'm pretty sure I didn't, but I got her credit card.

And that's what got me to the Bahamas.

And then I fucked my way through that island.

What?

Now I'm married to a...

Wait, you fucked your way through the island?

Completely.

Completely.

But I left.

I left because I love you.

As a matter of fact,

you're a fucking selfish type of suck.

Hold on, hold on, hold on, honey.

Honey, honey, honey.

That's a terrible nickname.

The reason why I...

The reason why.

Hold on.

Okay.

I had to leave the Bahamas because I robbed the jewelry store.

Okay.

Because they wouldn't let me buy you jewelry.

The woman who I was fucking in Vegas is credit card.

Can I have some money, please?

I'm getting there.

So then, remember when I went out on that boat?

Yeah.

I had to go out on that boat with all the women.

Well, I've just fucking fucked and sucked my way through that vessel.

But no, no, no.

But then I...

Then the FBI caught up to me.

And thinking of you, the whole time,

I married one of these Southern debutants.

Now the FBI don't know what's going on.

And so I'm going to make it back to you and our one child very soon.

Two children?

And figure this all out.

But for now, I got to lay low with my new wife,

who's awesome, by the way, and reminds me a lot of you.

That's just huge.

She's really hot and really young.

Just like...

Yeah.

I love you.

I love you.

I'm going to go.

Because when you told me...

I love you and I'm going to go.

You said this is a good dance.

I'm going to go and I love you and I got to run.

But I love you.

Also, the crimes you're committing...

You should have a lot of fun soon once this all settles down.

I'm really excited to settle down with you.

All right, so join Mexico.

Can we go away out of vacation?

We are in a vacation.

You kidding me?

You should see this chick I'm banging.

She's at 10!

Okay.

All right, honey.

I just need beans, though, for food.

I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that because that really pisses me off.

Okay.

All right, bye.

I love you.

You okay?

I love you.

Okay, that's great.

I love you.

I heard you.

Okay, okay.

Hey, later.

All right, key.

So, her father owned a big factory.

It was an elder statesman in the society scene at Garrett.

Easily charmed them.

He learned how to waltz as a boy in Panama.

So, he just needed that and his big charm to get in, right?

He told the family he was in real estate.

And a few weekends a month, he would go out of town on business,

which meant robbing a bank in Canada.

Man.

King.

I mean, this is, this guy's life is insane.

He needs, like, the fix.

There's no drug that can give you this heart palpitation.

So, Garrett and Roger flew up once a month.

Garrett, like, robbing Canadian banks because the tellers were more docile.

Followers of orders than the...

Would you like him on any orders too?

Yeah, the Americans were not like that.

We also have some traveler checks.

American clerks give you, you know, cowboy.

Yeah, just pull the gun.

So, Garrett robbed millions of dollars in travelers checks and cash from at least a half a dozen banks.

Working his way up to number one on the royal mounted police's most wanted list.

Oh, he's number one.

Oh, we're going for this guy.

Yeah, absolutely.

He's, this guy's really...

This guy's an absolute...

He's the Wayne Gretzky of...

He's an absolute bear.

No, he's not been invented yet.

The Annabelle Gretzky just yet.

Goldie Howe.

That's closer.

They called themselves Butch Cassidy in the Sundance Kid.

Wow.

And copyright infringement as far as all the others.

Very cocky.

Wow.

But also, that doesn't end well.

I believe it did.

We're the body and Clyde.

Garrett signed one hold-up note to Butch Cassidy.

They would tell a reporter they were doing the real thing while Newman and Redford were

quote, just acting.

Yes.

That was a movie.

So when you say you're the real deal, they were acting.

Right.

But you're also not them.

But it's also based on real people.

So...

Yeah, so you're...

We're really doing it.

Right, which makes you an actor to their story.

I don't think that's right.

Okay.

Okay, but this was a terrible...

Anyway, here's a million dollars.

This is...

Okay, thank you.

Still, he's bored.

What does he want?

He needs to go to space.

Well, he feels stuck in Southern High Society.

Because he's married and he's with a family.

Well, you know, my family...

He's still...

Man, works so demanding.

I'm his wife.

The real...

And then he comes clean to his Southern wife

that he's a bank robber.

How do you even start this?

Honey, there's something I gotta tell you.

Exactly like that.

I'm married to three different people.

I have gone to court.

I created a guy named Greg Ross, who I blamed it all on.

I was in the Bahamas, Rob, and when I bought the yacht,

started porking you.

But I already got a wife and two kids.

Now, it's a hat.

I don't think you came skinned about the wife and two kids,

but I bet he does it by crying and being like I'm so stressed out.

I don't know what I've done.

Yeah, totally.

Yeah.

I'm so lost in my own self.

I want to be good and you make me good.

You're the reason I need to tell you.

And you can fix me, honey.

You make me want to live and be strange.

Sometimes I'm so hard to be brave.

No, okay.

Like what?

What's the note?

Why?

Baby, don't you know it's so hard.

I'm aware she, of course, is in love with a full moon.

She's in love with him.

And no matter what, she's sticking by him.

Right.

Why make me so happy, baby?

Did you turn up the temperature?

He'd bring her to Montreal where she'd stay in the hotel

while he robbed a bank's back in a little bit.

Then they'd fuck on a giant pile of money.

Don't hate it.

Once on top of a million.

I used to do that money, but it wasn't enough.

There's a couple of fives in here.

Once on top of a job jacking off.

Once on top of about a million dollars in cash.

Wow.

That's pretty good.

That is great.

But the itch,

Garithitch.

What is he wanting?

What does he want?

Why he's doing riskier and riskier things.

And eventually, he came up playing up my ass.

Eventually, it ends up in him roaming a bank that was being watched by the cops.

Dude, he's just out of control.

And he is arrested.

Roger gets away.

Roger was probably like, dude, do you want it like?

Yeah, what are you doing?

Call 911.

Roger, come over to the room.

I'm going to fuck my wife on top of this money and you're going to watch.

The cops are going to watch it.

I'm going to confess to everything.

But something on happens once Garith is in cuffs.

He said he didn't feel bad.

He finally felt free.

Freedom!

When he's caught, he's going to buy his bag.

When he's caught, he feels alive.

Yeah.

Right.

Free of lies and deceit, free of the world that he'd built around himself,

the artificial fake world of lies.

Yeah, I bet there's something nice about that.

Yeah, there probably is.

He was treated like a celebrity by the Mounties, like the John Dillarder of Canada,

like this guy's the shit.

One bank manager even stopped by to see him telling the press quote,

I must say he was a perfect gentleman in my bank.

That's very nice.

Very?

Yeah, that's a compliment.

He's no mask when he robs, either.

Why would there be?

The 70s.

Yeah, he was, well, and also for him, he was just like,

here's my name.

I'm in room 502.

So claiming that he isn't sane, he was sent to a brand new maximum security

mental hospital near Montreal.

And there he made a daring escape.

That involved a 1968 Mustang, a toy gun,

and taking both a tiny warden and beautiful secretary hostage.

A tiny warden?

Tiny warden.

Hey, wait a minute.

I'm the water in this place.

Look down your son of a bitch.

Now, wait a minute.

You ain't going to get out of here when I'm in here.

What?

You ain't going to be in here.

There's rules.

I can't.

The first one, my friend.

Can you, can you speak up or, I don't know, stand up?

That's bad.

That's about time far.

I don't know, I don't know, that's bad time far.

I don't know, I don't know, I'm on my warden.

How did you get this job?

I think, I know that.

I don't know.

Well, my dad, hey, pay a big night.

Hey, you're my third man.

And then?

Did I see you in bar and barely circus?

Were you the littlest man?

Did you go to sleep again?

No, he's so cute.

And he takes a secretary?

Well, so he, he posed, Roger posed as a lawyer and gave...

He's two are like...

And came in and gave...

He's Jordan.

They are.

And he gave, um, Garrett, the toy gun.

Oh, I'm his lawyer.

He can have a pistol.

Oh, okay.

And the prison secretary was also hired by Roger.

And they get out and they speed for the border with us.

So they got, they fake secretary?

Yeah.

He just was like, and also, uh, this is Sheila.

She works here now.

It might be a different secretary.

I might be confused about that.

Okay.

But unfortunately, just after he let the hostages go near Syracuse,

he bumped into them again at the bus station.

What, what, whoa!

What are the owls?

Oh my god, I thought that was you.

Oh my god.

You were the guy who just took us hostage.

I am.

Sorry.

What a small world.

My apologies.

You're the guy who just took us hostage.

Where'd he go?

What?

Oh my god.

I stepped on him.

I'd better put him out of his misery.

I...

No.

Uh, so he, he was trying to hit the West Virginia

in up for a money wire.

And the guard hostage had just flagged on a cop.

And Garrett was arrested again.

This time, he was sent to Miami to face charges

for his dozens of crimes.

Well, I don't know where we should put a guy

that gets easily stimulated by his surroundings

and always wants to participate in crimes

and sometimes drugs.

Let's put him in Miami.

That total of up to 70 million is stolen,

money checks and jewels.

Holy fuck.

But with his record of insanity...

Hey, remember Susan?

Look, get back there.

So, yeah, he's got it in.

So they're like, well, he's clearly crazy.

Yeah, the FBI sends him to a shrink first

because he has a history of insanity.

Have I ever told you about Greg?

Greg Ross rises up again.

Who's Greg?

Meet Greg.

Garrett said it was all by the way,

Greg has two Gs on the end.

Yeah.

Of course he does, right?

Hey, he likes money.

Garrett said it was all Greg

and Garrett played the shrink like a fiddle

and ended up walking at a prison

scot-free after three months.

Take that, you motherfucker.

Quote.

Life was exactly as he came to believe.

Nothing really mattered and nobody really cared.

This is like he...

We are all in his simulation.

Yeah.

So there's really...

Why would you not do this?

Yeah.

I mean, he's like walking around like he's like Neo.

Yeah.

He can't be stopped.

Yeah, he can.

He just says...

So what would he do?

You know what I mean?

He's gonna just like jack off all eating breakfast

and then he's gonna be like,

what are you gonna do?

Put me in jail.

I'll get out.

It's Groundhog Day.

But two Gs.

Like I get...

Okay, so...

He's saying he's this Greg Ross guy,

but he's committed so many crimes now.

He'd be like,

well, actually both you and Greg,

you and Greg have to be locked up.

Yeah, I'd be like,

look, unfortunately,

Greg is taking the steering wheel

of the...

A little too much.

The project, a little too often, okay?

Greg's in you a lot.

Now, why are they running?

No, that's not Greg.

No, that's not Greg.

I'm not saying that's Greg.

And that's not you either.

I know.

There's a third.

Why?

Jimmy Stewart.

The actor also lives in me.

He's the moral compass.

Greg's the bad guy.

This is what it goes like a lot.

Hey, let's rob a bank and marry a debuton.

Now, wait a minute, Greg.

You're not gonna get away with that again.

Jesus Christ.

Nonetheless, Garrett pressed on.

Now that he was free of the fear of being caught,

he no longer needed to sit with his back

against the wall at restaurants.

He planned out a life on the straight and narrow.

Yeah, uh-huh.

Go and clean, baby.

He stayed in a $40 a night Miami hotel

and often had $1,000 in his pocket.

He used his stolen loot to marry a gorgeous Canadian nurse

from the maximum security loony bin.

So he fell.

So this guy must be charming.

That's one of the reasons that he can con people is

he's clearly charming as far.

Yes.

Is he handsome?

He's got to be.

I don't know.

He's got to be.

He bought a mega yacht with the help of a buddy in Los Angeles

and he used it to charter the elites

and lease a marina Miami that he'd fix up

and start ricking in the dough and it worked.

Well, he doesn't need any money.

It worked for a day.

It's not a long time.

You need the yacht company had pulled the fast one.

They robbed the robber.

They claimed Garrett had stolen the yacht

and no payment had gone down.

Ooh.

Pretty good, right?

Yeah.

The company owner vanished.

His car was found two days later at the Miami International Airport.

This is the only thing they can get

Greg Garrett high at this point.

I bet.

He's just like, oh yeah.

I need to find this fuck.

Yes.

Hell yeah.

Garrett told the judge the money he used to buy the yacht

was from a buddy who owned brothels in Mexico.

That's just a great thing for him to judge.

So what are you saying?

He ripped me off.

I took all the sex worker money that he got.

He called them gizpacos and I brought those to pay that guy.

And he ripped me the fuck off.

Also, I invented a guy named Greg.

He ain't even real.

Now wait, there's a third person who could talk to you

unless you roll in my favor.

No, I know.

No, wait a minute.

No, okay.

Guilty execution.

That guy called me.

Got all the whole systems on trial.

With Garrett's record, the judge almost had no choice

but to rule in favor of the company.

And this became big news when the Marina Company found out

the real story of who they've been doing business with

and they booted Garrett out.

So now Garrett, he's pissed.

Yeah.

He told the reporter, quote, I'm through playing it straight.

I tried to straighten out for about 14 hours.

I got fist fucked.

Now I'm back.

Greg's back, baby.

Watch out, Canada.

Of course, because at this point, he had been arrested

for major crimes over 20 times and served total of two years.

So now he becomes obsessed with his own death.

My God.

He's pulling robberies that were beyond risky,

not caring at all if he's caught,

longing for a shootout with police.

I mean, that's a great way to live, honestly.

He can't take the fact that he got bested.

Yeah.

It's making him insane.

Right.

Making him?

Well, he was fine before that.

That's true.

He can't sleep.

He just thinks about ending his own life.

It's always thinking about it in the most spectacular way.

Not like a Garrett way.

He's got to go out big.

Then he caught a headline, a man from Brockton, his hometown.

The one named after his family had hijacked a plane

and after landing it was killed in a gun battle with the Fets.

And so Garrett is like, I have my way out.

That's pretty good.

That is great.

And the year wise, we're in the 70s.

This is when hijacking.

There was a hijacking era.

This is nuts.

This is it.

Right.

People don't, I, it was probably right around,

maybe right before I was born or right around there,

where it was like hijackings were very common.

Oh my God.

It was all the time in the early 70s.

It was like, it's like how you got to if I could Vegas.

He taped his Walter Pistole below his elbow

and built a fake cast around it,

making it seem like the fake cast also a big player.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Well, let him go.

His legs broke.

Oh my God.

There's nine swords.

Oh my God.

He takes a cab to L body cast.

Well, go ahead, sir.

Okay.

That's how I got $40 million worth of cocaine

across the border.

So he takes a cab to LAX.

And he walks right up to the TWA desk

and body one way ticket to New York in cash.

Okay.

In his seat, he asked the flight attendant

for a stationary kit.

A stationary kit.

Writing.

Oh, right, right, right.

Imagine when they had that.

Yeah, God.

They have a stationary kit, please.

Absolutely.

Absolutely.

Everyone's writing on this flight.

It's one of the best ways to make the time go.

Now, would you like to plug in your headphones

and listen to one of the two radio stations we provide?

No, thank you.

I'm going to stare at the back of the seat.

Oh, key.

Doke, that'll be six hours

until we're where we're going.

Perfect.

He wrote, quote,

you are being hijacked.

Act.

You are being.

Okay.

Act naturally and lead the way to the cabin.

Act naturally.

So what is that?

A little story you're writing?

I have a pistol and there is a bomb in the aircraft.

Who is this from the first person POV?

Jesus Christ.

So what is this?

It's a fucking note.

I'm hijacking the plane.

And the character you're writing.

It's for you.

It's not a character.

Take the story resonates with me

as if it's me writing it to you.

A couple of reasons.

The character is a strong choice,

which I really like from my mains.

It's just a few V.

I think you're getting to the action too quickly.

Oh, God.

I just like it.

So maybe if you start to lay the foundation a little bit.

I just want to die.

Who is this guy?

How did this start?

Where's he from?

I'll bring you over some some supper.

Blow it up the plane.

You can think about it a little bit more.

He tore off his cap to this man as a story.

He'd like to be here.

He tore off his cap.

He needs some work.

Torf is cast and showed the stewardess the note.

And she trembling, walked him to the cabin

where he pulled out his pistol.

It's real now.

Oh, wait.

And then also like,

well, where are we going?

Where were we going before?

I just want to die when we land.

Land where there's the most cops.

The captain had been in the situation before.

As hijackies were a bit of a mess.

It happened to me last week.

They're fat.

I mean, they're literally fat.

And so he's calm when he complies with Garrett's requests.

So with the gun in hand, he says, quote,

gentlemen, I don't want to use this.

I'd rather not even hold it.

If you will give your word of honor

that you will not do anything foolish,

I'll put it back in my belt.

It will be handy, but it won't be dangerous.

Okay.

And they agreed.

They're like, yeah, okay.

Yeah.

You know, better than the gun pointed at me, yeah.

So he's passed into a landline on the ground

and he gives his demands.

He wanted to talk to the president.

That is a good one.

It's a great first one.

Yeah.

That's very good.

By the way, any list should start with that.

Demi tricky dick.

He wanted.

Are you hold on there?

He wanted $306,800.

You confused?

Yes.

That was the exact amount

that he was ripped off in the yacht deal.

He's obsessed.

He's obsessed with the yacht.

The yacht, the yacht, the yacht deal has sent him

fucking spinning.

Man.

He got bested by himself.

Very easily too.

He also wants George Padilla released from prison

and he wants Angela Davis freed from all charges.

And while we have you on the phone,

you want to see your wife and two kids?

What?

Which?

Oh, Susan, you have a...

Susan from L.A. Garrett, Jr.

Yeah. Oh, fuck yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, no.

I don't think they should see me like this.

That...

We're probably going to kill you at the airport soon.

Yeah.

So then they shouldn't be there, actually.

Okay.

Actually,

yeah, let's have him there.

Okay.

That might be good.

Okay.

And by the way, the president's on the phone.

Hey, tricky dick.

Hello.

Oh god damn it.

What's this all about?

So he with all this action going on,

he's something doesn't feel depressed anymore like he's like,

yeah, life baby.

So they landed JFK to refuel hoping to fly to a country in Europe with good

extradition laws.

That's where they're looking to fly him.

I think so.

They're refueling in JFK, so they're going to be grounded.

They all know he's doing this.

And then they're going to fly to Europe and the FBI is like,

take him to France because the extradition laws there.

Yeah.

Okay.

Or appeal like instead of like,

hey, he's at JFK, should we get him?

No, no, no.

Flam to France.

Then we'll get him.

Then we got him.

But the FBI stall him.

And he made the choice to give up his own leverage by releasing the hostages on the plane

because it was the noble thing to do.

So he's going to do the suicide thing.

Right.

But first, he ordered that they all get as many drinks as they wanted on the house.

Um, what?

Let's party!

Before I let y'all go, let's have a few cocktails.

Let's dance!

I met a woman.

I really like her.

The FBI connected him to a shrink.

He'd spoken to a couple years before to further stall him.

Greg, I know it's you.

And I need to talk to you.

This is Dr. Shapiro.

And this is Dr. Jenkins.

And I need to talk to Garrett.

Okay.

Well, there's only one.

Who is this?

My name's

Wahek.

My name's James.

My

sometimes I get forgotten in this little story.

Well, I wish you were actually.

Yeah.

Uh-oh.

I get that.

We don't have a shrink here to talk to you.

Hold on, hold on.

We don't have a shrink here to talk to you.

Hold on, hold on.

Nobody wants to talk to you.

Hold on.

Hold on.

You want to be quiet.

Now be quiet.

I'm trying to.

Devastating.

Trying to get a, try to get a story out of it.

Devastatingly intrusive.

You make no sense.

I make all the, now how dare you say that to a man like me.

I've never, I'm a guy who even hijacked this little

jump of a jump of a jet here.

Okay.

Ever ended in death.

I got well.

Probably the best way for this one.

And if you have to be awful.

The shrink asked Garrett, uh, why he was doing this.

Quote, well, Dr. Hubbard, I can tell you why these guys take

planes out of this damn country.

I'll tell you right now.

And I hope the whole damn world is listening in.

These correctional institutions and rehabilitation centers,

they don't even try to correct anybody.

They don't build anything.

They don't.

How dare he?

They don't put character and they don't build judgment.

How dare he, how dare he?

They don't indict the mental health system.

The system is on trial.

I mean, that is mocked at a fucking taken advantage of because he can.

And you know what?

That is kind of, I guess, what he's saying.

But it's also the idea that he's sitting here going like,

rehab doesn't work, but this is Trump.

But he's just like, yeah, yeah.

Of course, I paid off politicians because everything's corrupt.

Yeah.

Of course, I cheated on my taxes.

That's how I got your position.

Be allowed to.

You rob a man of five years of his life and he comes back in a society without

having left anything for himself.

Let me tell you something.

More people die for the system than die in Vietnam.

I mean, he's right.

Sure.

He's right about that.

Yeah.

Garrett agreed to switch.

You know, the Vietnam thing really tripped up a lot of their stuff.

It's really unfortunate.

Garrett agreed to switch out of the crew for,

out, switch out the crew for fresh bodies who are ready to fly internationally.

It's just all a bunch of clear FBI agents.

Yeah.

Hi, I'm Dolores.

As they entered the plane, Garrett had the co-pilot,

checked them one by one for weapons.

And the captain arrived, then the co-pilot,

then an engineer, something's off about that engineer.

The engineer's uniform had three stripes,

which is a captain's uniform.

And Garrett knew in the moment that this was an FBI plot to kill him.

How, first of all, adept he is at this and how stupid is the FBI?

Well, put an engineer in a captain's outfit.

They're pretty stupid.

What?

It was too late.

The fake engineer pulled the gun and shot Garrett through the hand,

the arm, and the neck, and he crumpled to the ground.

His last words...

Fuck that, yacht, guy!

The last words he heard were, quote,

pulled down his pants so he can't run away.

What?

That was with the FBI yield.

Pulled down his pants so he can't run away.

And while you're down there,

well, it looks like it's all curtains for old Garrett.

Garrett survived.

What?

I didn't have, well, died.

And then he went through a grueling trial.

Garrett's defense was that he had not

been the hijacker.

The hijacker was Greg Ross.

We got to get Greg out of me.

By any means.

The prosecution conspired with the judge.