Bonus #171 - Rufat Agayev [PATREON PREVIEW]

One of my favorite comedies of the last few years was jury duty season one such an inventive

show with such funny people and there's a new installment that ups the stakes right now.

In season two, jury duty presents company retreat the groundbreaking social experiment

leaves the courthouse for a corporate retreat in the mountains. Trust falls anyone?

The retreat is for rock and grandmas hot sauce great name. The company's fake everyone's

an actor except one unsuspecting gentleman Anthony. That's the setup. Expect bigger laughs and

some heartfelt moments that might get those eyes misty. Watch jury duty presents company retreat

now streaming on prime video.

I'm just calling because I've a bit of a moral dilemma that I'm kind of in the middle of.

So I met this girl and she's really cool. She's super sick. She has really good music days.

Like we get along. She's a really good sense of humor. I've hung out a couple times.

I've dealt a couple times and the thing is she's a cop. She's like in like police academy

and like we've kind of talked about it and I like ask I was like yes like what's up with that?

Yeah I was like oh I want to be like one of like good ones and I was like okay sure and I don't

know like I guess I'm just struggling with that because it's like just being a cop is so like

I don't know a crazy thing to be signing up for right now. I know good ones but she's sick

as a person so it's like I don't know it's weird I don't really know what to do or how to

like proceed I don't know so any advice to be great all right thanks guys.

Well I don't know man how serious she's just going to be she's in a cat police academy.

She's Latina too. You know she got that probably fat. She got that fat ass in your

cop pants. Yeah absolutely they are flattering. They are. They do they do make your ass look

pretty big for the women. I have the men you know I don't I don't really see there I don't

really see any cheeked up male cops. Would you date a woman that used to date a cop?

That used to date a cop I guess it's in the context like is it she did it when she was like

young and didn't really think about it and then since been like because we all you know make

mistakes in that sense but if it's the kind of thing where she respects cops no I mean I wouldn't

date someone who respects cops or is a cop I mean there's no way that I just don't we would we

would have such an incompatible worldview and it's not this look I have friends who are cops

but it's like they're kind of grandfathered in you know what I mean and it's like look I see a

cop on the street it's like I'm not going to immediately think he's a fucking bad person you know

there I'm going to like I'm not going to be a dickhead to just some random person I see at their

job I don't think being a cop is good like I don't think and I think obviously the there's this

weird outsized reputation cop some people put on cops where it's like they're heroes where it's

like in reality their jobs are really not that fucking dangerous compared to other stuff and other

careers and they're paid it's it's an incredibly corrupt job they'll fucking overtime they rack up

the you know like the the the the the the the the the the refusal to have outside people

like to have outside like an outside agency be the one who who handles investigating like cop

incidents right like it's like it's like a weird mafia like

uh sort of culture and I just I don't think that I could be in a serious relationship with someone

who was a cop I could probably fuck a hot girl who was a cop for a month and make fun of her

about being a cop while I do it and it could be a fling I don't know though other I don't know

that I could if it was serious I don't think I could do that I think it's gonna eat this dude

like yeah she's definitely Latina that's the thing she's definitely like I know it

or she's like one of those whites with a fat ass too like you know like she's Albanian or something

I mean I don't know you asked a question about what I did a girl who dated a cop

my girlfriend her ex was a cop wow a recent ex yeah and what what's that like what have you

taught have you delved into that hmm I think I think she I think early on I checked I think she was

like a second date I asked her she I was like are you a sign that's important are you a sign

is your film like nah because she's half she's half Japanese have Jewish and so but she did not

have a good relationship with her dad who's Jewish so like she went to like Tel Aviv once to like

visit him it was a terrible experience I was like yeah he's in there doesn't Tel Aviv yeah can't

can't and I was like I can't I'm just gonna let you know that's yeah I don't do that and she knows

my stance like yeah I'm a socialist yeah yeah I don't think socialist I don't think we don't

necessarily like not fuck with cops I think we don't fuck with non-community people right like

like yeah like there shouldn't be people who aren't like community-based like that the only time

you see him is when like something either goes wrong or like you said just like no checks and

balances and the thing is it's like are these even people who live in these communities like

people who fucking come in from the suburbs to police the cities there's something inherently

fucked up about yeah and people then look is it possible I guess that there are people whose heart

is in the right place and think they are going to be one of the good ones and then spend time in

the system realize there's no such thing as being one of the good one and leave you know what I mean

like is it possible that this this person is with could be kind of naive about what being a cop is

like she's like oh you can be one of the good ones I'm gonna make change from within you go there

you see how fucking impossible that is and then you leave the job yeah that's possible she could

she could you know that could happen I'm just saying it's something to monitor and it's like you know

you can barely do that shit in comedy you think you can do that shit as a cop I'm gonna

yeah I'll be one of the good ones like nah yeah you gonna be opening up for the devil or somebody

you know I mean yeah so that's interesting though that is the the it is it is it is important to

I mean sec you said the second date you kind of were like I pressed her on her like and then like I

found out she it was like almost like two you know not two strikes but two like red reddish flags

absolutely but like yeah I don't know I have never gotten the vibe from her that she's a person

that's like you know I mean it's also look here's the thing like her politics are in the right

place now yeah so and I don't know if her politics were in the wrong place you never know sometimes you

know women they come from all they face all types of trauma yeah they might be you know sometimes

women fall in love with pieces I've fallen in love with women I knew I shouldn't have been with you

know I mean and I do think there can be something attractive about something that is like I mean

the like man in uniform thing I think is also wrapped up in a type of masculinity and a type of like

being attracted to things that are bad for you right like so who knows and maybe just maybe

the guy was a good guy and they didn't get that deep and ultimately didn't work out so who gives a

fuck people can make mistakes but if if some if I was someone who dated a cop and was like they're

just so brave they're what we do without them I mean no I'm not dating that person no you know what

I mean but if I if I could date someone who has a less extreme view as long as we align on you

know the what you know crime other criminal justice shit but you know her being a cop

if this is eating you alive brother it's not going to get better and I would say

you probably should not do it or if you do look if it's something to monitor in the relationship

right like it's hard when that ass is fat though I agree it's hard and she this this girl could

probably do pull ups yeah yeah yeah who knows maybe I don't know or not I think like something yeah

now you're a new recruit looking I mean maybe a new recruit yes but because these ice do

thing doing pull up no no no she's not nice ice is a complete another you can't be fucking

dating anybody in ice they're a complete piece of shit anyone who's in ice quit or kill yourself

those are that's that's the only way you can be a good person if you work for ice or border patrol

right now kill yourself kill yourself or quit or even better be a whistleblower record some shit

put it out there and then quit but you know they'll everyone who works for ice is a fucking coward

they would never do it don't be fucking them girls in the massage you know I mean yeah yeah don't get

got don't get got cash Patel style yeah it was funny think about the like the the hot women that

aren't as good at acting as Gal Gadot in Israel become honeypot massage agents it's crazy she was

the best actress she's the one out of the honeypot group that they chose to act

that bitch with cash but they can't give a better actually maybe that's who they the shitty

actions get to go to Hollywood because the good ones have to pretend they want to fuck cash

Patel or whoever else maybe that's how they're doing it but anyway man yeah look personally

I don't think I could do it I don't think I can be in a serious relationship with the cop

and you know I had Fred I've had friends who were cops and it really fucked our relationship

up for a while but then it comes back around where someone isn't their whole identity and you know

my then your friend is just a guy who got into the wrong career but also to the extent that you

could be one of the good ones kind of is has a fucking family I would still be like get a different

job but it's like you know he is he didn't turn him evil or anything and so it's like you can

turn back around but when someone is a new recruit and they're zealous about being a cop and

and like is excited about it I don't know that I could do that shit but if you catch someone kind

of jaded on the way out it's like about the retire and and thinks it was a mistake I could see

that I could see dating somebody like that but I think move on dude unless the fat they ask

is that fat it's gotta be man why have I asked my age fat guy I found on angi.com to change

my grandpa's trachea tube because I was so amazed by how quickly he replaced our air ducts

I knew I could trust him to change poppups too while I was on vacation make a quick young man

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