Christy Primmer on Radical Responsibility and Rebuilding Your Life

For a while, I was running this show,

all the determined society.

It was based on the determination

to discipline, seeing your process

and seeing your standard.

I didn't look like it.

How old do people have to get before they realize,

wait a minute, maybe if I take radical responsibility

for myself, every faucet of my life will improve.

You can't get better in any area of your life

from a place of shame or hatred.

And I believe that you cannot be cruel to your body

and be in alignment.

I had decided mid 2025 that I was done being overweight.

I was done perpetuating a message that wasn't aligned

with my belief system.

I was like drinking and eating.

And I was doing well.

I mean, on the outside, the people looking in,

they'd be like, oh, she's gaining weight,

but she's rocking it.

And for the most part, I was okay with it.

But when you're looking in the mirror,

but you're like, I can't go out in the world

and tell someone this empowering message

when I'm not even applying it to myself.

Right? That's it.

And that's when I said to myself, come on, girl,

get your ship together.

I love it.

Like, take accountability.

What's up, everybody?

Welcome back.

I have an amazing guest today,

Christy Primmer.

I'm going to tell you guys something.

She was on my show four years ago.

It was February 4th, 2022 when that episode dropped

and that was episode 15 of the Determine Society.

And now we're at what?

275 or something like that.

It's just crazy.

And the thing that was so funny about that guys

and we'll probably get into it,

it was when I was doing it on Zoom.

And I, and you remember when I started the recording

and then you're like, hey, afterwards,

you're like, you might want to just like intro.

Intro.

Yeah, intro.

Are your show?

Yeah, I was like, so I had it going.

I was like, I just hit record and then I'm waiting

and I'm sitting there and you're like, yeah,

you might want to wait.

So she's the one that helped me with that

because I had no idea what I was doing.

But Chrissy Primmer is an amazing human being.

She's hosted a TV show called Women Who Leads.

She's on her sixth season.

And now it's prime time to shine, baby.

Welcome to the show.

Thank you, Sean.

You know, I am so grateful to be here, of course.

And I love humble beginnings.

And we were talking just a bit earlier

about how just start, just do it, right?

People wait till it's going to be perfect.

And wow, four years ago.

It's crazy.

We just celebrated five years.

Bravo.

Five years.

You know, it's funny because the first year,

when we talk about start slow or just start.

So if that was done in 2022, my first episode ever

dropped on February 21st of 2021.

So that means in a year, I did 14 episodes.

I mean, think about that, right?

And now we do two a week.

And so, you know, you're not always going to start off

on the cadence that you want to, or like you said,

with your TV show, you didn't even have the proper chairs yet.

No.

I mean, I didn't know what I was doing.

But, you know, here we are four years later.

And it's just so nice to reconnect with you

because, you know, we hadn't connected in so long.

And I was like, no, I probably need to reconnect with Christy

because it's been so long.

And I'm just so excited to have you here.

I'm equally as grateful.

Because for me, this is a part of history.

Yeah.

I mean, it was like, when I had no idea what I was doing,

I mean, I probably still don't know what I'm doing.

But I think you figured it out.

I mean, at least I can hide it better, right?

But, man, what an honor to have you back

as a repeat offender four years later.

What's new?

Oh, man, you know, there's so much going on.

I've actually shifted doing more television.

So like you said, season six, we actually just wrapped.

And just my book sales are doing better than they had been.

And I'm actually putting myself out there more.

I realized that I was just dabbling.

So I was putting myself out there, pursuing my dreams.

And I could say it.

Yeah.

But I actually was afraid of being really seen.

Yeah.

You know, it's funny because when I look back, right?

I mean, maybe even a year ago or two years ago,

three years ago, I was like, I always thought

that I was doing enough.

Like I am doing what I need to do.

But you, and that could be true, right?

For the amount of knowledge that you have at that time.

Now I look at it and like, now I know the back end.

Now I know, I'm starting to learn every day

and I tell Dan about this all the time is like,

I feel like I'm playing chess finally.

Yeah, because now I know the back and now I know what works.

Now I know what everybody's doing.

And so now we're building to a point

where we can do that too.

And then we're on a level playing field, right?

But you just never know, you know,

it's your point, you were dabbling.

But then you probably thought like, yeah, I'm all in.

But now you know more, you know?

So, you know, I think for me, what's hard is

when I look at those moments, I go, man,

I initially start to shame myself.

Like you weren't doing enough.

How do you work through that?

Well, shame has been a big perpetrator in my life.

Yeah.

I was a trauma counselor for 23 and a half years

and still active in the mental health space.

But I work through it by facing it head on.

And I like to really top into my self awareness.

So one of the things I was actually just talking about

this with my husband, I really ask myself,

do I am I thinking this or is this something

I think I still need to be carrying around with me?

Like have I actually learned my lesson,

released it, forgiven myself or whoever I let it go?

Or am I still needing to carry it around?

And 98% of the time the answer is let it go.

Like shame is such a heavy burn

and that we all carry.

Especially when we have big visions

and big callings on our lives, you know?

So I work through it by facing it

and I try to normalize it.

Yeah, you know?

I love that.

You know, we're talking about shame

and that's been a big part of my life too, right?

Because anytime I try to get in shape, I do shame.

Yeah.

And that's hatred towards oneself.

I used, it never, it never works

because you're not operating in a place of love.

But I recently had a good buddy of mine,

Alex Boylan on the show.

He had a college tour on Amazon like season 17

or something crazy like that.

And he wrote a book called The Miles That Make You.

And on the back of it, it talked about the backpack.

Like once you put in your backpack and carry around,

doesn't define you, but it tells a story.

And so then one of my buddies,

my business partner, Pat goes,

well, I read it as cause I got emotional.

I looked at all my past, you know,

trauma, I guess if you want to call it or, you know,

internal injuries, whatever it was.

And I go, that's the heavy stuff

that I don't need to carry anymore.

But as you go through life,

it's also people place things in your backpack as well

that can get very heavy.

And so when you mentioned that you're doing the self audit,

you know, through self awareness, like, okay,

well, do I still need to be carrying this weight?

Yeah.

That is such a helpful exercise.

When did you start doing that?

Well, periodically for probably the last 20 plus years,

but intentionally, very much so the last year,

I had decided mid 2025 that I was done being overweight.

I was done working with certain brands.

I was done perpetuating a message that wasn't aligned

with my belief system.

Yeah.

Yes, I lost a lot of money and opportunities,

but I believe that what's meant for me

will never actually miss me.

Yeah.

Which took a long time to really digest

and believe that too.

But you know, it's like, we got one go with this.

And I don't want to be waking up every day,

angry at myself or not in the shape I want to be in

or have the stamina or the energy.

And I made that decision like, really intentionally,

probably almost half a year ago.

And this year has been kicking off.

Come on, like, powerhouse.

Just kidding.

You can ask, dude, I love it.

It's prime time to shine, that's what you said.

Damn, right?

It is.

It's funny because you said the word intentionally

because I asked you a very specific question.

How long have you been doing?

I want the audience to really think about this.

When I say it and repeat it, please stop what you're doing

and really go inward.

She said, I've been doing it on and off for about 20 years,

but intentionally the last however long,

like last year, right?

There's a difference between doing something guys

and doing something intentionally.

What are some of the differences that you know about yourself

when you know you're actually in intention?

Well, you know, not to play off your show,

but my determination, my focus,

not what I want is doing.

Myself discipline.

You know, it's so easy to say, oh, we're going to do X, Y, Z.

But when we don't have the intention

and the true focus behind it, we allow excuses.

We start hanging out with people.

We shouldn't be hanging out with.

We're doing things we shouldn't be doing.

You know, we're not staying in a routine

that's actually going to allow us to win.

And so I look at all of those things in dissecting.

I'm very, very analytical of many things in life.

Ask my husband to do this.

But I'm very analytical and to a fault critical of myself.

Yeah.

The critical aspect I could really relate to.

Yeah, I mean, and I think it's hard, right?

Because like, especially if I screw up at home,

I get to get impatient with, you know, my wife or my kids.

Like, I'll internalize it.

I'll be very critical of myself.

But then what I realize is it doesn't help me move forward.

What I need to do at the moment is like, you know what?

I was wrong.

I made a mistake.

Do you forgive me?

You know, and I think those are powerful moments.

But dude, like, you know, the journey is so different

for everybody.

But when we were talking about intentionality, you know,

for me, like, I look back and I thought I was doing all the things.

Yeah.

And I thought I was ready.

And no, I wasn't because I wasn't intentional with me.

And I had a similar, this fly is like all around me.

Do you see that thing?

It's going crazy.

That's what we say.

Well, yeah, they puked on you.

So I've been thrown up on like 70.

Yeah, like, well, the ones in America do.

I don't know about Canada.

They definitely do in Canada.

Okay.

Cool.

All right.

Awesome.

But the, the thing of the matter is, is I, you know, at the end of 2024,

I had the same realization, you know, the audience is probably tired of me

of hearing about it, but it's a story.

And like the more and more, I tell it, it's a one thousand percent, right?

Because every time they hear it, they may pick up something different.

Right.

But there was a moment where, and I just couldn't, it was hard for me to get off

the couch, unless I was recording.

So if I wasn't recording, I was laying down the couch in a blanket, watching TV being

depressed.

I was unhappy with me, right?

I could, I was like, oh, I thought it was, I'm not doing well in revenue.

I don't have any investors.

I can't, can't get anybody to invest in the show.

Nobody gets it.

Yeah.

It wasn't that.

Nobody got me.

And that was on me.

That was all, that was my fault.

That's when the mirror comes out.

Oh my God.

That mirror, like that thing skips.

Shit out of me, right?

So I remember one day sitting in a room and my good friend Jeff Delaney was there.

And I said, I couldn't even look at him and ended up become, it starts talking to me

and I was like, hey, do you need your help?

I was like, I can't get out of my own way.

At that point, I was 228 to 230 pounds.

Very, very heavy for 5.11, right?

And I made a decision that I was going to go to him, you know, and I was going to go

to his weight loss clinic.

I was going to be consistent with my hormone therapy for his other clinic.

He's like, okay, listen, this is what I want you to do.

I want you to go have a good time for Thanksgiving.

Yeah.

You come back.

Get a hold of me.

And if you're serious, let's do it.

Let's roll.

Yeah.

So, you know, fast forward to however long it is now, 182, you know, much leaner, great

shape, but the thing that helped me was being an intentional with what I eat, planning

my day.

Yeah.

And coming from it out of a place of love and respect for myself instead of shaming

myself, it gave it this ability to become a lifestyle and I have sustained ability with

it now because I'm not constantly worrying about is this working or what not because what

I do know is I speak better.

My show's gotten better.

We have revenue.

We have investors like we have everything now since I did that.

Yeah.

And so what that tells me is the one thing that bothered me the most was the one thing

holding me back.

Oh, it's always true.

Yeah.

I've related to that so much.

Yeah.

You know, you just said something about you can't get better in any area.

I believe in any area of your life from a place of shame or hatred.

And I believe that you cannot be cruel to your body and be in alignment.

And that was a hard lesson I had to look at because my husband loves me all sizes.

When he met me, I was like 130 pounds.

Yeah.

I'm not that now.

Right.

Right.

Because yes, to shed weight, release weight, but to be healthier for longevity.

But my husband's always worshipped me as a woman like my body and always complimented

me.

And I had to say to him, you know, that's great.

But please don't you don't have to love me the wrong way.

Like please hold me accountable.

Wow.

Like not because you don't love me, but because you do see that that's big.

That's big.

Shout to Anthony man.

That's pretty big.

And he probably didn't know what to say because no husband's like, oh yeah, you've gained

weight, you know, like, but it wasn't the way it was.

I'd been through a lot of things my business really took a hit, you know, like just stuff

that happened.

I lost my dad, but just stuff with our son and, and I was like drinking and eating to

cope.

And I was doing well.

I mean, on the outside, the people looking in, they'd be like, oh, she's gaining weight,

but she's rocking it.

Yeah.

And for the most part, you know, like I was okay with it.

But when you're looking in the mirror and you're looking at yourself and you're like, I

can't go out in the world and tell someone this empowering message when I'm not even

applying it to myself.

Right.

Bingo.

That's it.

Hey, guys, we're going to take a quick break and we're going to slide into our recovery

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And when I had Dr. Jay on the show earlier in 2025, it really spoke to me because his

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So let me know how you guys like it until then stay determined.

For a while, I was running this show, all the determined society, it was based on determination

to discipline, singing your process and singing your standard, I didn't look like it.

Yeah.

It's like, yeah, my show, right?

I'm intentional with my show, I'm disciplined and determination in that.

But that's only part of my life.

It's just what I do.

And I wasn't living that, I wasn't the living, I wasn't the walking billboard in the

determined society.

Am I in now?

I believe so.

You are now.

I believe so.

I believe so.

One billion percent.

Yeah.

Like, but that took work, right?

And to your point, you can't do it as shame or self hatred, that works for about a week

or two.

I mean, it really does.

It does.

But how rewarding is it?

It's not.

It hurts, right?

It makes your constantly, you're in this, during this mode where it's just, no matter what

it's not good enough, you know, it's just not good enough.

Like, you know, I'm still, you know, 220 pounds, I should be, I should be 205 at this

point, right?

And once I let that go and just said, all right, well, this meal, I'm going to have this

because this is on the plan I said I would.

Yeah.

You know, now I'm mixing some stuff, right?

Yeah.

But I love plans because they work.

Yes.

They work the plan.

The plan works.

Yeah.

I got it.

Damn it.

I had a donut.

They had donuts in there.

I had a donut.

But they said they were more healthier ingredients.

I'm like, boom, great.

Give me the maple bacon one.

But, but I mean, I know I can do that.

Yeah.

Right.

And it's not going to hurt me because I know what's going to happen the rest of the day.

I had that.

So if that, then this, yeah, it's like, you know, the next meal is a protein shake.

And then the next meal is shaking.

The next meal is whatever.

And so my point is, is when you have that plan, whether it's in your personal life or

your business, it doesn't matter because the one thing that is truth is they all work

in unison.

That's right.

You don't have to know, you don't have to know how you just have to know that whatever

I say I'm going to do, I'm going to stick to it and then everything else just starts

falling into place.

It's weird how that happens, right?

It is.

And you know, I'm actually, I'm walking through that season right now.

So I made a commitment.

I let myself kind of slack a little through, we got to our house in Florida in October.

So you know, got a golf cart ride or go out, you know, we do all these things.

And I said to Anthony, I said, you know, I'm going to let myself just kind of like, go

while we eat very clean, that's not, I didn't gain weight from eating clean.

I gained weight from the snacking and too much wine, you know, and not working out enough.

Yeah.

But I said, I'm going to do this.

This is my plan.

And then I'm going to do dry January.

I'm going to go hardcore at my gym membership.

And everything's going to start working out better.

And he was like, okay, yeah, babe, I support you.

And he does.

I'm very blessed that way.

So I started, I did all those things and that accomplishment of keeping my promises to

myself, not for anyone, but me, wow, like the things happening right now, the opportunities.

And I'm not where I want to be, but I'm in the mind frame that's going to get me there.

Yeah.

And I'm going to just enjoy the, you know what, out of this journey, because life is like

when you, when you, I don't know if you get this, but when I do what I say I'm going to do.

And I don't like working out all the time.

I don't go because I love it all the time.

I despise it.

See?

But you, but you do it because it's a means to get you to where you want to be.

And when you, when you do those things and you're like, wow, I'm going to bed tonight

and I'm so proud of myself.

And then the next morning you wake up and you get an email from a brand that never looked

at you before.

It wasn't, I don't think for me, it wasn't size or whatever.

Energy speaks volumes.

Our energy is talking all the time.

Our online presence when we walk into a room, people can feel us, right?

And so when we're in denial and not aware of what we're putting out there, but we think,

you know, it's all good.

That affects everything, marriages, children, friendships, business, our money.

And I don't want my money messed with.

I don't know about you.

You've always said that.

Yes.

I like when we said that.

Yeah.

But it's also one of those things where, you know, you, oh my gosh, what did you say

earlier?

You talked about, um, we were talking about relationships and they just said marriage.

And so I really want to, I want to dive into that really quickly because anytime you try

to fix something and business, a relationship yourself, the first, the first, knee-jerk reaction

for everybody is like, I hate this about me or I hate this about my spouse, right?

I hate this about my business, so I'm going to change it.

What I found is, you know, because I said, I needed to come out, my transformation from

a place of love.

So if you are unhappy in your marriage, right, not you, but the audience, I'm going to

have you're unhappy with yourself, you're unhappy with your business, still choose to

love those things.

Yeah.

And come from it, you know, in a place of empathy and understanding, especially with your

significant other.

Absolutely.

Because if you, if you have some, some issues in a marriage, which every marriage has

issues.

Oh my gosh.

Someone says like, all marriage is perfect.

You're a fucking liar.

Absolutely.

You're not in my face.

You're not even human.

No, no, no.

We all have issues in our relationships, even friendships, even business partnerships.

It doesn't matter.

No one is the same person.

We think of things differently and we see things differently.

So it's like, but if I want to fix something in my marriage, I'm going to try to do what

I can and too many people are trying to control that other person or that other entity

or variable in their business or whatever it is.

And they lose all the time because they haven't held a mirror up.

That's right.

Like, that's all you need.

And you know, one of the things that I do this in my own life, I always joke, the Anthony

has had custody of me since I was 24 because I've been with him since I was 24, I'll be

47 this year.

So it's a long time.

So I, you know, I say that half jokingly because I'm like, if someone's wrong with me,

blame him.

Damn it.

I think it's all your fault.

But no, in all reality, what I do is I visualize people how I want them to receive me.

So like if there's a person I've had a conflict with, I will visualize that being resolved

easily or I will send them love and it's not always easy to do.

You know, like some people have really hurt me or deceived me.

And I pray about it.

I'll try to visualize it.

But when it comes to like my marriage, I have an amazing marriage, but it's taken a lot

of work and certain seasons of my marriage haven't always been hunky-dory, you know?

Yeah, they shouldn't be.

Same with parenting as your children age.

Like we only have one child, he's 25, but I mean, we parent differently.

So I mean, there's so many things.

And then business, that's a whole other thing.

People that are always late or they don't do what they say they're going to do.

And then you have to navigate that, but you have to do what I like to think is with

class for yourself first, because it goes back to that energy, right?

You don't want to be upset with something going on in other areas of your life and then

pollute your home life.

Yeah.

Right?

You said something interesting.

How I want someone to respond to me or perceive me or say, yes, receive me.

You know, and that all comes from energy, that all comes from being intentional in the

words that you speak, but also having already said energy, but having that warm feeling

when you're approaching somebody, even if that relationship's bad, they can feel it.

They can say, oh, okay, Chrissy isn't coming at me with that energy right now.

This is actually okay.

Then you find that common ground and things can improve that way.

It's safer.

Yeah, absolutely.

Absolutely.

Like I said, it's not always easy, but I'm also very mindful of who I associate with.

And I mean, believe me, I've learned the hard way.

I thought I had people figured out and then I'm like, oh, I didn't see that coming.

And sometimes it's like, wow, okay, next.

And sometimes it takes some time to really like process because I don't want something

someone else did to affect my trust issues with other people.

Yeah, because that other person shouldn't pay for that person.

Exactly.

Yeah.

What I look at too is like, even though that person did something to me or I am perceiving

it that way, what part did I play?

Exactly.

What was your role?

Was my role, you know?

You know, and it's crazy because in this business, and when I say this, you're going

to be like, yeah, a lot of that shit happens.

Oh, every minute, every second, like, there's a lot of times when people say, like, man,

that must be great.

You know, you're on top of the first ball or not.

I'm never done.

And the other thing is, is something that's always happening behind the scenes.

You're always being undervalued, overlooked, scoffed at mocked, mocked, compared to

the chat about you.

Oh, dude.

I mean, bring it on.

Like crazy stuff, right?

Yeah.

But it's also like, okay, like you said, you know, I have to pay attention to what circle

I'm placing myself in or what I'm allowing in, in every single time I can go back and

I can go.

That was my part in it, like that, you know, that was my part.

I should have exited this community in this way.

And so I'm just like, dude, I'm just going to roll out.

Yeah.

And you should be able to do that, by the way, you should never be gaslighted for not sticking

with someone's community.

It's like, if someone left my $45 community, cool, yeah, it should never be an issue.

It shouldn't be, right?

But people take that shit really seriously.

Because they need to heal.

They have a lot of work today.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, we'll say that.

But I just, I just think it's, it's an interesting, you know, this industry, it can be

very dirty.

Mm-hmm.

You know, whether it's, you know, you know, the podcast, TV, PR, like that whole game, like

everything is the modeling industry that I'm in, that's insane.

That's insane.

Oh.

I modeled recently.

I saw that.

That's a fashion.

You look good.

You look crazy.

Oh my god.

You look fashion week.

I know.

We're going to do it again in the fall.

And it, it's funny, but my daughters, they, they want to be in fashion.

They want to have their own company.

They want to move to Paris.

And so I better haul ass.

I mean, because they're, you know, seven and nine, like my goal by then is to be able

to fund it.

Well, and you're showing them through your everyday life that they can achieve their dreams.

Yeah.

So come on, dad.

I mean, yeah, I got to, I got to get on it, right?

But it's, it's such a beautiful experience at the same time because the more you learn,

the more you know, it's like, you can.

Navigate things much easier.

Oh, yes.

Right?

It's like, hmm, there's the problem.

Mm-hmm.

I know I can find that solution over here and then you go get it and then you implement it.

And then you just, you're able to grow in ways that never thought was possible.

Like I remember in 2024, we hit a million listens for the first time.

Amazing.

And it took us until November, you know, November to do it.

And I remember once we hit it, I was like, oh, yeah, I did a post, right?

It's a million.

Yeah.

Cause I thought it was a lot.

And now what do you think?

It's not.

Well, even just if you look at like, you know, I mean, again, at that point, I wasn't playing

the comparison game.

Yeah.

For us getting to a million.

That's huge.

For annually.

That was big.

Mm-hmm.

You know, in, so I was 2024.

And I remember once we hit it, I was super excited and I did the post and was like, all

that dopamine.

Next day, I was so freaking depressed because then I, because I, you know why?

Because the fun part was the chase.

Yes.

So all of it.

Once you learn to stay in the chase, celebrate your wins, but stay in that hunt because that's

where you're built.

And so in 2025, we did close to nine mill.

This year, we're pasting 12 and a half to 13 mill.

That's amazing.

There's some, there's some shows that do 13 mill a month.

And that's okay.

Yeah.

Okay.

I think too.

One thing I just, I want to highlight everyone I've shared your podcast with.

It's the realness of this.

You know, and coming from trauma counselor background to going back into the modeling industry

and the media industry and even as an author, there's so many people that are like forgetting

what it actually took to get there and forgetting that they can shift and change and be proud

of every single milestone.

Yeah.

Yeah.

No, I love that.

And thank you.

Because, you know, Dan tells me, look at those.

Look at those.

It's amazing.

Grateful.

Yeah.

Right.

Super grateful.

Well, and you're helping people.

I hope so.

That's the goal.

That's that.

That's the purpose behind this.

Right.

And I think that's why I've been able to stay kind of where you're at.

Like whenever you share the show with someone, listen to it or sit down in that chair

for the first time.

Yeah.

Like your experience today is going to be light years different than it was four years

ago, right?

But it's like when people come and they sit down in that chair for the first time and

we have this conversation, they're like, what just happened?

Mm-hmm.

Like, I've been on big.

That was my favorite thing I've ever done is because we have the real conversation and

we get down to the root of the human experience.

Yeah.

And that's what is needed.

I don't care.

Oh, desperately.

I mean, I don't care what country you live in.

We have forgotten to love one another.

I'm only giggling because our country, Canada really needs a lot of help.

Well, walk me through that though, actually.

I mean, because that's interesting to me because from what I know of Canada, it's

a beautiful country.

It's a beautiful country.

It's a beautiful country.

Like, so I mean, because I was.

I think this is a, I think America is beautiful.

I love America.

I love my country, but it's a fucking cesspool right now.

Times that by 10 or maybe 100 and that's Canada.

It's, you know, it's, I always bite my tongue because I come from a military family background

and I've been a, I'm a proud Floridian for six to seven months of a year.

Yeah.

That's what you want.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And for 16 years, you know, I've been coming to Florida and our country and Canada,

I live in Ontario, but it's just gone to the shambles.

I mean, it's, it's hard to explain, but the racism is at an all-time high.

I'm not even kidding.

I live like three hours west of Toronto and it's insane.

Stabbing's every day, shootings every day.

And this, this is like stuff that never happened.

Like we just had our massive school shooting out in British Columbia.

The first school shooting in 40 years and people are still saying that everything's going

tickety-boo and that, you know, things don't need tweaking.

I'm like, no, we have a problem.

We have a problem.

You know, it's funny, not funny, but what to me is comical is that we don't get that stuff

here.

We don't hear the news in Canada, really, right?

We hear what the media outlets want us to hear, right?

And so we don't get that worldly news.

My wife grew up in Ecuador.

Oh, wow.

Yeah.

She, you know, that is awesome.

I didn't know that.

Yeah.

Well, she was born in Puerto Rico.

I knew that.

But I know she grew up in Ecuador.

I mean, they're Ecuadorian, right?

Like 100% Ecuadorian.

Her dad was in Puerto Rico working.

He was an executive for I think Citibank.

Okay.

And then they ended up moving back to Ecuador when she was two or three.

Well, the whole point is is that when they would watch the news, they would actually

get a neutral reporting of the news from worldwide.

Okay.

That doesn't happen here necessarily anymore.

You might get international news, but it's whatever that outlet believes the slant is.

Mm-hmm.

And I don't think that's real reporting.

No.

It's kind of messed up.

And that's what drives the engine of racism, the, you know, dividing countries and

dividing.

Ignoreance.

Absolutely.

Yeah.

And Canada actually put a ban.

We can't access certain media anymore.

What can't you access there?

Like certain news outlets.

We can't access as soon as we come to, well, what I love about coming to America is I get

American Netflix.

It's way better than the Canadian Netflix.

Really?

That's true.

We have to wait months, sometimes years from what you guys get.

American Netflix, here's fire.

I bookmark everything I want to watch as soon as I get to the States.

But yeah, they've, they're just certain bands.

And I think people are afraid to have conversations.

And you know, one of the reasons I get asked all the time, why do you go to the States so

much?

And I say because I love it, the diversity.

Everybody, everybody matters.

No.

And a lot of Americans I talk to don't always feel that, but from an outsider coming in,

that's what I see.

That's interesting.

That's interesting.

That's interesting.

Because like I said, I was like, wait, are you sure because that's what I hear the opposite

about Canada.

But we don't, you know what I mean, like, yeah, but, but again, I'm going to take your word

for it, obviously.

I trust you.

There will be Canadian listeners that will say, no, she's not telling the truth, but I

am.

And sometimes the truth is hard, but, but the truth is different for everybody, right?

Exactly.

They may not see it.

Yeah.

And they may not be in the tax bracket.

I am.

And my money going to things that I don't support and believe in can be very frustrating.

Oh, yeah.

And you know that.

I do know that.

Yeah.

I know.

That's all certain tax bracket sucks.

Yeah.

You think it's cool.

And you're like, oh, I owe that.

Yeah.

Like, that's not fun.

Yeah.

It's like, damn, I missed the W2s.

We're just going to take it.

And I get both.

I get dinged by both, because as a property owner in the States and then work and stuff,

I always claim my, you know, my accountant does it.

I don't do it.

But anyways, it's like a double whammy, but you know, I wouldn't change it for the

world.

I, I loved to come.

I love to go home or whether it's beautiful in the summer, but the palm trees, it's

the palm trees for me.

So you're in clear water, right?

Winter Haven.

Winter Haven.

Oh, God.

Winter Haven.

Winter Haven.

Yeah.

Holy shit.

Polk County.

Polk County, baby.

So it's funny, because when you, when you texted me the other day or when we were going

back on a message, back for the messages, I figured out what day you're like, no, because

I have this and it's three hour drive, I'm like, clear water.

I'm like, oh, she must be in Orlando.

But winter Haven.

Beautiful.

Yeah.

Beautiful.

I love it.

Pretty cool, huh?

Yeah.

Pretty cool.

It's 16 years.

We've seen a lot of development.

Mm-hmm.

But I just love it.

It's like, um, but it is home.

It's home for us.

You know, seven months of the year.

It's home.

Well, it's home.

I mean, it's, it's, it's, that's the majority of the year.

Yeah.

That's, you know, there's a lot more.

I wish it was more sometimes.

Yeah.

And we're working on that.

Well, yeah.

You'll be able to figure that out.

Yeah.

Eventually be here full time.

Yeah.

It's right here.

It's, it's, it's, it's, it's my reality.

Well, that's it.

Right.

And you, you see it and then you feel it emotionally.

Right.

And that's what it feels.

Feeling it.

That's already.

No.

No, go.

Because that's the thing that is missing.

Mm-hmm.

A lot of people talking about visualization, the secret.

They miss that.

If you can't feel what you'll feel like in that situation, you're never going to have

it.

Never.

It's just, you know, I've experienced it for a while, so I know it's, it's just the way

it is.

Because your mind thinks it can't achieve it if that.

You saw what I put out today, right?

No, I haven't.

Oh, my God.

So two days ago, my friend David Waldy came into town, we did an episode in person.

We did an episode probably two years ago.

Okay.

But I've known him for about three, three and a half years.

And he pulled out his note book, his like little remarkable note book, right?

Okay.

You can save all the notes to the cloud.

It's all that kind of stuff.

You know.

And he's like, hey, do you remember the conversation we had, our very first conversation we

ever had?

Like, no.

And he had it.

He had the notes.

Wow.

And we did this exercise, you know, basically rating my happiness on the scale of one to

a hundred.

I scored a 38.

Oh, wow.

I was just, it was the hardest point that I feel I've had in probably, you know, 10, 20 years.

And, you know, there was no joy.

I wasn't happy.

I didn't feel I was, you know, close with God.

And I felt like my marriage was fine.

Like neither one of us wanted out, but I just like, I don't feel as connected as I should.

I want to be able to be more, you know, not again.

I don't want people to think I wasn't connected to my wife.

No, I can't.

But anyone just like can think.

Yeah.

Well, who knows.

The fucking trolls out there.

Oh, because they're so angry at themselves.

Yeah.

The radio.

Yeah.

But, um, but I wanted all these different things.

Like funny.

I was scared of losing everything.

Yeah.

And so I scored myself a 38 out of four out of a hundred.

Now, so, and I was very overweight.

Right.

And, um, the other exercise you had me do was close my eyes and think about what does my

ideal version of Sean look like?

Okay.

What is he wearing?

What is he doing?

So I went on and said, you know, that, that version of me is wearing tight black jeans,

a tight form fitting black shirt, and black and white shoes with red accents.

And he's like, okay, do you remember what you said about your appearance?

And I said, yeah, I was, was in great shape, you know, but she said something specifically.

I was like, I don't, he's like, the vascularity in your arms.

That day.

And he's like, oh, and you also went and said what type of car you drive.

I'm like, okay, well, hit me with all this.

Yeah.

He goes, you know, he hit me with the clothes and he is like, look at your outfit.

I had a tight black shirt on, short sleeve, tight black pants in the exact shoes that

I described.

And he goes, we're all purchased after, I forgot about that conversation.

And I was like, what the hell's going on?

He goes, yeah, you said you were speak on stage, top 20 show for a rat.

And he goes, is that your TRX out there?

I go, it is.

He goes, yeah, that's what you said you're going to buy.

Wow.

And it's because I felt it.

Yeah.

You know, and I didn't know how.

And you like yourself feel it.

Yeah.

I mean, like, I, I'm a big field person.

People say don't chase feelings.

I love feelings.

I'm going to chase a shit out of him.

I want to cry.

I want to laugh.

I want, I want goosebumps everywhere.

Like, it's always make fun of me in the truck.

Always because the song come on.

I'll say quiet.

And then it's like, yeah.

Oh, Daddy's feeling it again.

He's got the goosebumps.

Shut up.

Like, but they'll love that about you.

Yeah.

Like, I mean, they say love it, but they just they tease me.

But like, if you aren't chasing feelings, then you are not feeling anything and how can

you ever create something?

Exactly.

And even like, I just want to shift it to like, of course, marriage family and our appearance

and all those things, but your business.

Like people would say to me, oh, you've got this TV show and you've got this and that.

And I'm like, yeah, but I could do all of that and still not be feeling, you know,

the bass or into the next step of my vision, because I have a big vision for my life.

And obviously you do too.

And a lot of our listeners do.

Right.

And right now they old.

They're like, yeah, they get it.

But it's like when people can step back and say, okay, this hasn't been working for me.

So maybe these feeling things aren't so crazy and woo woo.

Maybe it is the secret ingredient in this recipe of creating my dream life.

Yeah.

Imagine.

Imagine that, right?

But I mean, it's, it's crazy because like, I, at a younger age, I never under, I

mean, I didn't understand it.

I made fun of it because our coaches would put us in right field.

You'd have your bat in your hand.

Lay down.

I'm like, why am I laying down on my bat?

Close your eyes, envision the pitch, envision that count or their runners on base.

What's the situation?

A lot of times they give us the situations runners are on second base.

What do you look for?

Yeah.

Here we have to visualize it.

And I was like, man, this is the dumbest shit ever until I got into a game and I'm like,

oh, fuck.

This already happened.

Yeah.

I recall.

Yeah.

I was like, oh, wait, no.

The situation is runner on second.

There's nobody out, not bunting because maybe the guy behind me doesn't have a strong, a

strong bat.

So I'm looking for something to go the other way with.

So I'm looking at her third.

I'm talking baseball.

That's what I love.

I played baseball for 18 years.

You picture.

Yeah.

So it's like, it's, it sounds silly until you do it faithfully.

Yeah.

That's the key word though.

Faithfully.

And this is what people don't understand.

People understand they go, okay, faithfully means consistently.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Faithfully meaning you're doing it and you have the utmost faith that it's going to work

without any evidence of it being true.

Yeah.

And you know, and, oh, that just made me think of something.

I was talking with someone and they had said to me, faith is also preparation.

So yes, doing the work and the faith part of believing and feeling it, but being prepared

so you can be that person that has the things you want to have and sustain it, which you

had said earlier, once you go back, I want you to repeat, be the what?

The person with faith that in preparation, so you the person, be the person who has the

things that you want and sustain it.

You know, the reason I want you to repeat that, be the person who would have all those

things.

Yeah.

Is because you're going to get anything that you want until you become that woman and

that man, that, that person, I've learned that the hard way many times, Sean, you

may have to be hurt.

I have to be heard to have what I want.

The only way that I'll tell you everybody in this room that I hack the system on because

I wasn't him.

Yeah.

Is when I met my wife, I got wasn't the person that should have even attracted at that

point her now, dance, probably sit under this bullshit, because you've always been a great

dude.

You've always been a great dad.

You've always been someone that has a lot of value, but, but like it would make sense

now, but she saw something in me, right?

There was those elements, right?

But like, when we talk about, you know, a lot of times people say like, I, I don't have

the relationships I want or I can't get the, the girl or the man that I want.

So many people are looking at what they want in somebody, but unwilling to look at who

would I need to become, do attract that.

That's right.

So quick, funny story when I met my husband, I had a checklist of everything I wanted.

It was like, did you literally have it written out?

I did.

He's here.

He can attest.

When he, when I finally was, he went out at the dinner and checking that shit off.

He took almost three months to get me to even have a coffee with him because he wasn't

my type.

I mean, he's gorgeous brown eyes tall, you know, all these things to those beautiful browns.

He does.

He does.

And I mean, you know, there was that, but I had it in my head.

I had like all these goals and all these things.

And I had been through such a heartache and such horrible, horrible relationships that

I'd made this big checklist.

And so when I finally met him for coffee, I said, here's my checklist.

This is everything that I'm looking for.

And I want you to go home and make a checklist.

And I know it sounds so weird.

I mean, we've, this is our 20 year marriage this year.

This is trans action.

Like, you know, Sean, I, you know, remind me of, I mean, over the top, hey, it's okay.

You, I mean, listen, I love that about you, but it reminded me the other day when I was

on this software program was, okay, do I buy the, do I buy the basic or do I, the, the

professional?

And it's like, well, there's the checklist, like, no, I need all that.

Like I haven't written down here.

I got it.

That's so funny, dude.

And you know what?

The one thing was on the checklist that he wasn't, a jock.

And then I talked with my parents and my dad, who's been gone.

This is 12 years now, but my dad said to me, well, how's that jock thing been working

out for a young lady?

And I said, oh, you know, yeah, they're so dreamy.

Yeah.

And I mean, he's an artist.

He's a brilliant artist.

He was a high school teacher.

They're a smart man.

And I thought about it and he, we reconnected and I said, you know, I figured I'd never

hear from you.

I brought a checklist, you know, he was like, no, that actually was so impressive that

you knew what you wanted and what your focus was and what your boundaries were.

And I have mine and you fit all of them.

And we've been together ever since.

It's so awesome.

It's so weird.

It's so weird.

Our son's always like, oh my gosh.

How is he doing?

He's doing amazing.

Well, he just had knee surgery, third knee surgery, but he's carrying up for baseball

season.

So he's healing.

That's great.

He's getting married in August.

I did know that.

I didn't know he was engaged.

He's doing amazing.

That's great.

He's the first aircraft mechanic engineer with herbs palsy in North America.

I don't know if you knew that.

Did you know my son had herbs palsy, caused at birth?

No.

Okay.

So it's crazy.

It's caused from brachial plexus injuries during delivery.

And so because of the terrorism damage to the brachial plexus, it affects the hand

all through the arm.

So he's got a bit of a palsy, he can't lift his arm out, but he's an incredible.

He's doing everything that the doctor study couldn't do because that is strong, how strong

my faith is and seeing my son doing these things.

So when I'm telling your listeners about see yourself do it, feel into it.

I did that over my baby.

Like it's mind blowing and it's kooky, but it's true.

You know, it's so funny because over the last couple of days, you know, I told my wife

and I had a wedding anniversary here.

I saw that congratulations.

Thank you.

We're at thank you.

We were at dinner.

I told her about my conversation with David Walty that day about everything three years

ago that I've freaking treated.

Treated.

Yeah.

And she goes, it's pretty cool.

And then I said, you know, I'm going to take Friday to myself.

Oh, well, maybe you can do it.

No, no, no, no, let me explain to you what I mean by myself.

No, like no, I'm not doing anything until you guys get home.

But like for me, you know, Friday is going to be, you know, maybe I go, I'm going to go

to work out, obviously, but maybe go get a massage.

But then you know what I'm going to do?

I'm going to connect and do that exercise again because it's clear to me that I need to

read up.

And again, it's not that I don't have my, my targets, but I haven't sat with them.

Yeah, exactly.

I want to sit with them again.

And the reason why I want to stay on this topic and I'm bringing up this visualization

because, you know, there's people listening right now that may not really understand

what the hell we're even talking about.

And I appreciate it, right?

Because not everybody's a visionary, not everybody's a manifesting generator.

Okay.

They may want to be, but they don't understand how to do it.

And so, you know, back in what tooth, what was it, 2000 and maybe six, seven, when the

secret came out, like right now, right, yeah, Rhonda Bernie, yeah, yeah, yeah, and that

came out and everybody was making vision boards, which, which I think are very, very effective

strategy.

If you do it the right way, right?

And for the audience, I'm going to get to the right way in a bit, but, you know, all

these different things that you want in your life, but there was a, there was a massive

component missing to the secret because I fell into it and everybody else that had new

fell into it.

So I was thinking about what they want, put on the movie screen of your mind, movie screen

of your mind, movie screen of your mind.

I want this car.

Cool.

I can see it.

Yeah.

That's it.

You just visualize this car.

Like, oh, yeah, then a Ferrari shows up on my driveway.

Yeah.

Hold on.

I wish that Ferrari may have showed up the driveway 10, 13 years later after the X

secuted the plan, right?

And so when I say vision boards and the law of attraction and visualization done the

right way, it's really, truly getting quiet and fighting through the noise in your

mind and seeing it.

And again, like I said before, feeling it and then letting it go.

She can't focus on it.

No.

I love that you're going to do that for yourself.

I'm actually going to check in with you in a week and just see how that week or how the

whole process goes.

But you just saw something like feeling it and letting it go.

And one thing I know for myself and thought I've worked with thousands of women and men.

I've had the privilege of working with thousands of people throughout my career.

And the one thing that's always been common is not letting it go.

Right.

You fixate.

Why isn't it hurt?

Why isn't it here?

Come on.

How come it's not here?

And you know, like my car I rolled up in today.

My dream car.

It's beautiful.

Thank you.

Thank you.

I knew that shit.

I knew you guys were in that young version of me would never have been able to afford

something about.

So it's just I'm so proud of being able to afford it on my own.

But that was like three, four years in the making and I had on my screen saver of my phone.

You know, my husband's here.

You can attest to this.

I had this car and it was a CLA.

Okay.

So anyways, three, four years go by.

Finally, I'm like, you know what?

I'm turning 40.

I'm going to buy myself this car.

Go test drive the CLA.

I'm like, I love it.

I love it.

I love it.

My husband goes, no.

Look at that car over there.

And I said, ah, that's like $50,000 more.

That's the one.

He's like, well, just test drive it.

You know, sometimes my husband and one of the people you really got things and they're

amazing.

And you lost your shirt 50 year in more.

That's the car you want.

Yeah.

Lost your shirt.

I test drove it and I looked at him and I was like, hot damn.

Yeah.

This is my car.

So we roll back up to the dealership.

I said, I'm going to put this amount down and finance the rest and two to Lou.

Yeah.

Pat asked, have you ever, but that was years.

My point is that took years for me to actually have it in my, in my lane lane.

Yeah.

You know, driveway, I guess you will say.

Yeah.

Is that what they call laneways up?

We call it laneways, really.

Interesting.

I know.

And that everyone looks at me.

You live in a bowling alley.

I live in a small town in Ontario.

But to your point, like it takes time.

Yeah.

Sure does.

It's funny because have you ever looked, have you ever thought about everything when

you were a kid?

Right.

And all the dreams and aspirations you had, whether they worked out or not or what you

wanted in a partner, obviously, and what you wanted in a life.

Have you ever done a full, like retro active audit, like, did I actually attract what

I want?

I've done that numerous times.

Again, I'm a very big journalist and self-reflective.

I'm very much an introvert, believe it or not.

I need a lot of alone time.

I recharge alone.

I can get lost in books, writing.

I do that a lot more than people never get set about me because when I'm on and on.

Yeah.

But I'm very reflective.

Okay.

And I actually just did that half a year ago, a little more.

And that's when I said to myself, come on girl, get your shit together.

I love it.

Like, take accountability.

It's so funny because all the good things and all the bad things I attracted into my

life.

Yeah.

I've attracted some bad things too.

I've attracted some tough stuff.

I remember in 0506, worrying about losing everything because of real estate problem.

And I was in mortgages and then I did.

And then I look back like, you know, what was the one thing that I wanted, right?

If I had a son, you know, I was like, my first child is going to be a son.

It's going to be my boy and my mom's, my mom and my grandma and her brother and her

dad.

They were in a car accident when she was six.

My mom and my grandma live.

My would be uncle and grandfather both died.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

Yeah.

It's crazy.

Right?

So it's real heavy.

But my grandfather, his name was Bobby Lee, Dostor, and he was a baseball player.

He was a catcher.

And he was born in 1932.

My baseball number was 32.

Wow.

And no idea.

Completely unrelated.

He didn't know.

I had no freaking clue.

Wow.

I can tell you that sort of later too.

But my point is, it's like I remember looking at this picture at my, I think my mom

had her, my grandma had it.

I can't remember which, but it was me feeding a squirrel.

And I was dressed like weird.

I mean, my, my mom dressed me weird when I was a kid.

I'm like, I'm like, that app.

It was freaking weird.

I look like a complete dork.

I'm like, I got slime.

I'm not sure.

Okay.

No, dude.

I had a mullet.

And then the vanilla ice lines.

I was ball ball players and kids, such a G.

It's back now.

I mean, Jamie upstairs has a freaking mullet.

I mean, it's like, it's like a cool thing.

No, son has a mullet.

See?

Baseball Harry says.

It's what's a base, it's a, it's called a baseball cut.

Yeah.

I try to get Bob.

I send to do it.

I'm like, do you get a mullet, bro?

He's like, he goes, no.

I'm like, dude, it's a baseball cut.

He's like, what about Bryce Harper cut?

He's like, no, I'm like, dude, this is, but anyway, but it's so funny because I'm, I was

looking at it.

I'm like, why am I dressed like that?

And like, why is it black and white?

They're like, because it's not you.

Wow.

I'm like, yeah, that is me.

They're like, no, that's your grandpa.

And so when that gave me truth bumps.

Yeah.

It's crazy.

And like, I always wanted to be a third baseman or a pitcher.

Well, when I turned 11, my dad's like, the way your body structure and the kind of situation

you have going on, you have a great arm, but you're going to be a catcher.

I didn't want to do it.

He was a catcher.

Okay.

Right.

And so into a point where in junior college, his friends would come watch me because they

were still around.

And I said, we could not tell the difference he was playing.

It's the same dude, right?

My whole point to this is, that's the connection with everything, right?

And that day that they both perished, that name died, the Doster name died.

Wow.

Right?

So I said, when I have a son, I'm naming him boom, boom, boom.

And anybody that I dated and got serious with, they had to be okay with that.

And then my first child, little boy, I named them all, boom, boom, I love it.

And I remember always wanting a Latin woman.

Check.

Check.

You had a checklist.

You just didn't know it.

Just didn't know it, right?

Because you think of these things.

And the whole, the whole point of the, of the rant is we're always manifesting.

Absolutely.

Always.

Always.

This is part of who we are.

Whether we're conscious of it or not.

It's part of who we are.

Yeah.

You can say universe, you know, God, I believe God and the universe is the same dude.

Yeah.

Like for me personally.

You know, I, I believe in Christ and like he's the universe.

He's the creator of everything.

Like everything.

It's everything.

Yeah.

It's infinite intelligence everywhere.

And so I just always like to tell people is like, you know, believe in this like, no,

I go, have you ever like thought of something like really bad and then it happened?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And you know, it's so important to have the things that you want to create the top of

your mind all the time.

But the biggest component is like, like I said earlier, like you reiterate is release it.

Yeah.

Go do something.

Go do something.

Right.

Yeah.

Think about it.

Feel it.

Know what you have to do.

Yeah.

Of course.

Like, who do I have to become?

Like we've been on this is no question that me and you get on this frickin' topic, dude,

Jesus.

But it's like, you know, you don't have to think about the complete how.

Yeah.

And I think that's where people get stuck.

Yeah.

Because it's like, well, how do I do this?

Yeah.

Sean, how do I grow a show?

I don't know.

Yeah.

But what do you mean?

I don't know.

I'm like, I don't know.

I'm not you.

Like, I know how I did it.

Yeah.

You might be way better than me.

But how you did it?

Probably wouldn't work for someone else.

It's not a one-size-fits-all.

Yeah.

Exactly.

I know that you want to create your life and live a good life and be responsible, but

also, like, dive into the hard shit because that's what makes us.

Yeah.

And stop avoiding it.

And I'm like, how old do people have to get before they realize, wait a minute, maybe

if I take radical responsibility for myself, every faucet of my life will improve.

Yeah.

Every single one.

Yeah.

Every.

But that's the point, right?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But I mean, like, look, it's all about, I guess, holding yourself, like I said, accountable

for those moments and, like, really communicating why you feel you reacted that way, but again,

we don't want to react.

We want to be able to respond.

Yes.

Then I heard the other day that if you get, I hate this word, triggered, but if something

comes up, it's a 90-second thing.

Yeah.

Hold on for 90 seconds, and if you don't freak out in the first 90 seconds, the odds of

you freaking out or saying something stupid and damaging a relationship with a loved

one is very, very slam.

Yeah.

90 seconds.

You know, I love that you're sharing that and something I just want to add to that.

I used to say this.

I did a lot of couples counseling as well as individual counseling and I specialize in

trauma.

So primarily sexual and domestic violence, and human trafficking.

And I would say to my clients, I didn't want to ever discredit them, but I would say

to them, how is the best way you can empower yourself in the moment when you feel triggered?

Because are you actually triggered or are you anticipating the trigger?

And they would look at me and some people were like open to it and be like, wow, I never

thought of that.

And other people would be closed off arms crossed.

Like, no, I'm triggered because he and she did this.

And I would say to them, just look at it with an open mind, explore it.

Because you're giving people or situations power over you.

And it's not to minimize what people have gone through because triggers aren't just

for trauma.

Maybe triggered when someone cuts you off in traffic and gives you the finger when

you're like, dude, you're the one that cut me off.

But I mean owning it.

And then I like that the 90 second because it's like, I know people that walk around all

day triggered all day.

That's a third identity.

It's their identity.

Good God.

And they don't see it.

You know, and I like the common denominator might be you, you, you, you, you, you know,

you.

That's it.

We always bring ourselves to the party.

Right?

Make a joke all the time, right?

It's like, you know, my two oldest from a, you know, previous marriage and most people

know that.

Yeah.

But, you know, they, Jackie's been in their lives since they were a little, little, little,

yeah.

Right?

But my family is dynamic is for us.

And, you know, what?

It is what it is.

And I forgot I was going with it.

Shhh.

Triggers.

Triggers.

We're talking about triggers.

Mm-hmm.

Aren't we?

Yeah.

We're talking about triggers.

Oh, man, I need an Adderall.

I can't remember who was going.

I said, man, we're talking about triggers or two oldest are from your, your previous

relationship.

Thank you.

And common denominator, right.

So, yeah, I have this joke where everybody says, I'm like, I had your children are so beautiful.

I go one common denominator.

Yeah.

This motherfucker.

Because all three for me is a joke.

So, common denominator.

I love it because Anthony adopted my son.

So I was married for a very short time in a horrible situation long enough to have my son

and get up is what I say.

And he adopted my son.

He's raised my son.

He's the only father my son is known and Louisville go places and my son is the male version

of me.

Okay.

He's six foot two.

He's taller than me.

But he's the male version of me.

And people say, man, you look like your dad.

And it used to burn me so bad.

I'm like, genetic queen here.

Yeah.

It's like, hi.

No, this is amazing for my son because it's so inclusive and he doesn't have to like

barf his story on everyone because people want to always know like the nitty-gritty

when it's not their business.

And so I, you know, I'd be like, oh, yeah, and Anthony would just glow, right?

And he would say things, not the common denominator, but he would say things.

And I thought, wow, but you just made me think of that.

And that is hilarious, but true.

It's even funnier is people will go to my wife and when my oldest in my middle, so

my son and then my middle daughter, when they're all three sitting there, oh my god, they'll

go to her and go, they look so much like you.

I'm like, and then, and then Jackie goes, well, ours with that we have together looks

nothing like me.

It looks just like her dad.

That's hilarious.

He goes, at least I got two of them, like, but I mean, you know, I mean, all the kids

resemble each other.

And I think with the, with the great thing is him.

And by the way, like, I want to edify you because that, that isn't easy, man.

That isn't maybe easy for you, but there's a lot of people out there that don't do those

things.

And that's not my problem.

So that's a real man, you know, and I love that.

And, you know, but, you know, it's so important because, you know, the whole genetic thing,

the blood and there, there's a lot of blood relatives that I don't speak to.

Oh, amen.

You know what I mean?

But I think what being a true parent is is not about who created that child.

No.

It's about who really parents and cares for that child.

Loves and disciplines and guides and comforts and provides.

Yeah.

It's crazy.

And you know, we have a clean break.

I know a lot of people listening might be in a different situation, but I didn't, I

didn't have child support.

I didn't have anything.

I just had a clean break, paid a lot of money to have a clean break.

Yeah.

And, um, you know, it's, it's been like, it's my dream family.

I always only wanted one child.

I always wanted a son.

I always wanted him to be an athlete.

It's so crazy.

It goes back to the athlete because you learn so much about yourself through sports.

But I always wanted to have like, nice home, nice lifestyle, like, and have my career.

And Anthony fully supported that, you know, so it's, it's, it's been amazing.

And having an adult child is glorious.

Well, I haven't.

I haven't.

I have two adult child.

One is a nine-year-old daughter and the other one is a seven-year-old.

No, I'm going on what?

17.

Dude.

I have a nine-year-old niece and she's.

She is going to give my brother and loss him great hair.

It's, it's so crazy because, you know, I have both.

I have a boy and a girl and my love for my son is so different than the love for my

daughters.

Wow.

It's just as powerful.

Of course.

It's different.

And Dan knows this.

It's like, he's got a son and a daughter.

Your boy, your boy, your daughters, I will bury somebody, like, getting fuck with

her, fuck with them, right?

But it's like, but it's just such a different, it's a different thing being a girl dad.

Yeah.

It's special.

But, oh my God, do you want to talk about frustrating?

You're lucky, bro.

You're lucky.

You don't have a fucking daughter.

Because they can, they can, they can get you to be the, the most ghetto part of you.

I mean, like, I have some ghetto.

I mean, I grew up in the, in the, in California, like, I have some gangster and, yeah, I

just got some gangster.

I don't look like it.

But I got some.

My son tells me to foffle.

What is that?

I don't find out.

Fuck around and find out.

Yep.

Yep.

Yep.

Well, you know, my son and my, and my wife doesn't like this, but my son's 12.

He's almost 13 years old.

He'd be 13 this year.

Yeah.

I was listening to hip hop then.

I try not.

Yeah.

All right.

Yeah.

I think so.

And so, like, when it's me and him and we're going to baseball, we're going to come

and come for baseball or doing whatever we're doing, going for a ride.

He gets to listen to unedited imminent and unedited drape and pock and all that because

I want him to know that, right?

Yeah.

But also want him to have that F.A.F.O. energy, too, to where he has this little bit of

flavor to him.

But like, like, my wife does not like the fact that she doesn't like it.

Yeah.

I see your point.

Yeah.

I was in percent.

She is correct.

I am wrong, but that's the reality.

That's what we do.

But, you know, those are those are fun moments, man, because, you know, when I, when he gets

in the show, he's like, Hey, can we can we listen to Slim Shady or like that actual

song, Slim Shady?

I'm like, what do you mean him and him?

He's like, no, the song, Slim Shady.

He's like, I'm like, okay, he's like, forgot about Dre.

I'm like, never have, never will.

He's like, no, the song.

Can you play it?

I'm like, it's my guy, man, I actually raised my son.

Listening to those kinds of things and he will remember now and he'll tell stories.

I expose him to all kinds of genres of music, but he will be like, oh, mom, I never even

realized I was in the car seat like we were bad.

Yeah.

I remember looking back at him, my mom was in town like two, three weeks ago, we were

all hanging out and I looked at her and I'm like, you're, you're really questionable

mom.

Is she goes, what?

I go, mom, I was a junior in high school and we were watching Friday together.

She goes, yeah, it's not probably not the best thing.

It was about smoking weed, selling weed and fighting and killing.

I was like, but again, like, because I think back then we could watch something and then

completely disconnected from it.

It didn't pursue much.

It was like, it's a complete disconnection from what the life that I lived.

But good God.

Oh my, oh my.

Wow.

Yeah.

We're already at an hour.

We haven't even.

Wow.

But so let's shift.

Okay.

All right.

So I want you to walk us through how you just wrapped season six of women who lead.

Yeah.

How to go?

Like what were some of the interesting people you've had on and were you going for season

seven?

Yeah.

So good questions.

So season six was my best jab because every season gets better.

Of course, as you know, I had some amazing women on Alicia, actually a heart of men.

She's just been nominated for the top Canadian woman entrepreneur award.

Wow.

She was on season six, a couple other women, Tanya, Bergen, she is a powerhouse.

She works with a woman named Kathleen Cameron, who is really big and like under Bob Proctor,

Russell Kaye, who is the best in peace, Bob Proctor.

Just so many women private chefs, like it just women that are doing the dreams that were

on their heart as little girls and why that matters to me is because that's what I'm

living out.

All the things I said I wanted to do as a little girl that people had said, like, oh, you

come from a broken home or you don't ever work for you.

I'm doing it.

So I'm like, yeah, underdogs always come out on top if they persist.

But yeah, I've had so many amazing guests and the whole dynamic of my show, like when

I developed the show and pitched it to the network, I didn't, I had no idea that it would

be this and I'm so humble that I'm so grateful.

And I feel like I'm just getting warmed up.

So I'm thinking of season seven and I'm thinking really big, even bigger than what we've

done, like prime time big.

And so actually it was just texting with my producers and I was like, you know, we got

a child.

I got all these ideas.

And so she literally was like, woo, we love these ideas.

Sometimes that's the brand girl.

It is.

And it's a moonshot.

You got to get it.

Yeah.

But it's crazy because it's like, I mean, four years ago when we were, you know, when

you came on a show, you're on season two.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Wow.

Yeah.

And you know what?

Now one thing that's really different and this is just to help anyone listening if they

have a show.

One thing I've gotten really good at is partnering with different brands that I believe

in and that I love.

And so I get all my outfit sponsored.

So I have full wardrobes.

I have a lot of wardrobes.

Well, we, we need to work on the wardrobes stuff, but I've learned how to leverage my talent

and the impact.

I mean, it's all about impact for me.

That is at the end of the day what it's about.

But there's been so much growth.

And I think it's just taken a lot of leaning back and learning and figuring it out as

we've grown, you know?

Yeah.

I mean, to your point, you know, like when I rewind to four years ago, I remember, you

know, having you on the show.

Yeah.

And not that I don't look up to you now because I don't want you to miscontrude that

because I do.

Right.

You know, but back then, I'm like, oh, my God, she's got a TV show.

She got two seasons and like, and she's coming on my show like what, I don't even know

what I'm going to do.

I don't even know what I'm going to talk about.

But it's crazy because like when you look back at all of it, right, and everybody grows

and everybody, you either rise to the occasion, or you find something different to do, right?

Yeah.

Because how many people do you know in that time period that we knew together that are

doing nothing.

That they're not doing anything that what they were doing back then.

I'd say at least 75% at least, at least, yeah, it's like they don't even come across

the.

No, I hope they're okay.

Yeah.

I haven't checked, probably check in on it, but no, it's like I'll go back in like if

someone pops into my mind, I'll type their handle in, you know, I'm like, what are they

doing?

Okay.

They're still doing it cool.

They're just not coming across things.

So I like a couple things.

They start coming.

So I can support.

Right.

But it's just, it's crazy to me because this whole thing is kind of surreal, you know,

the whole growth engine behind the show and the personal brand and like how it's gone.

Yeah.

It's kind of really cool to look at from Sean four years ago, not now, because the

Sean now doesn't get it.

Yeah.

But the dude four years ago would literally kill and maim to be in this seat right now.

Yeah.

And so like that's just kind of a point I wanted to bring up for the audience that is sitting

there and they may not have everything they want right now, because trust me, I'm far

away from where I want to be.

Oh, same.

I'm not even close.

Not even close.

Yeah.

But like, I've got to sit with the fact that we've grown it pretty damn good and pretty

damn quick.

Absolutely.

And it's so funny.

I was talking to somebody the other day up in New York, we're going up there to potentially

do a pretty big show with somebody on the third.

I'm still waiting on details.

Yeah.

He's actually available and he's available at this time.

And I was talking to the studio owner, right?

Like, hey, I'm going to have this this name on and I'll tell you off air.

Okay.

But I'm like, you got any other big names.

And he's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, I got this person, this person, this person, what about

this person?

Do you want this person?

I'm like, to a point where like he's telling me that he's friends with the person that

wrote Rudy, the screen wrote the screen.

Wow.

And he lives in Naples.

By the way.

Really?

Yeah.

I was like, yeah, he can come on anytime.

To think that I could have the guy that wrote Rudy sitting right right there, right here.

But he asked me a question and I paused.

He's like, hey, let me ask you a question, dude, I'm like, what's that man?

He goes, I just looks you up on Apple.

I was like, okay, do your top 25 out of every show in America.

He's like, not categorically, I go, I'm aware you're talking about out of all the genres,

like all the, whatever.

Yeah.

He goes, how the hell do you do that in five years?

It's like, I know, it took forever, huh?

He's like, that's fast.

Yeah.

Doesn't feel like it.

It never does to the person in it.

Yeah.

Do you know what I mean?

That could be applicable to anything that people are building, it never feels like it

for us.

Yeah.

But it's, it's amazing.

So it's, you know, and the other, the other question is he's like, do you ever fall out

of that?

And I'm like, yeah, of course, there's time to fall to 35, come back up.

Yeah.

Get up to 20, fall to 27 and he goes, but that's not that big of a swing.

I'm like, no, he goes, why don't you think you fall further?

I say, because I guess in your words, you know, I mean, I feel it took a long time.

You said it was quick, but, you know, maybe it's because we were in the top 100 for a long

time.

Then we were top 60 for a long time, drop back down to out of the top 100, then back

to it.

And we've worked all the way up.

Yeah.

I think if, when you stay consistent, you're bringing valuable conversations or whatever

the value prop is for whatever it is you do, yeah, if you keep showing up, they're tuning

in.

I knew listeners too.

Yeah.

It, you're staying power.

Yeah.

If you do it the right way, you're staying power is there because you don't, I mean, again,

we met and there's a, there was a bunch of flocks in the pants.

Yeah.

I don't hear anything about them anymore.

Or I, like I said, I hope they're okay.

I mean, I don't hear anything.

Yeah.

And it's because like when, and then when you look at it, it's because they didn't do it

the right way.

Yeah.

Oh, you just said something that I, I literally pray about this and meditate on it.

I've been, I've been offered a lot of shortcuts and I could have done a lot of different things