Even A 2,000 Year Old Roman "Board" Game Is Better Than Monopoly

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Oh

The faint but warm memories of a sports lifetime left behind

Oh

And that is indeed what our guest today did he went west he burned the fucking boats

Which is one of the most admirable things in life

Yes, it's where you leave no option. You're like we're taking this island and we're burning the fucking boats

So for all you people have been saying I want the original open. I hate the Utah song

Well, you're getting a little bit of both today

Paul Jarchin how you doing buddy?

Oh, I'm so glad to be here Zab. We have so many things to talk about the aluminum Z Vegas

We've got Vikings drama. We've got McDonald's drama. I've got all these things that I'm excited to talk to you about and

You and I by the way

You look pretty good and look at us on camera right here

These are two good-looking middle-aged man right here not terrible chatting about world events not terrible

We we have been blessed with the good leads as they said in Glenn Gary Glenn Ross

We've been blessed with a good material

Of course the good material of stuff to talk about is all over the place and all you have to do

To be interesting I say is to be interested

If you're interested in stuff you can be interesting at a party. You can be interesting on a podcast

But you have to have a mind that goes huh

Never knew that have a curiosity have a fascination about things so

And now you and I have built up enough of a library of topics. We've been through that. We know

Tickle each other

That we're like oh we see something we send it to each other like we got to talk about this

Like a week in advance by the way. Oh absolutely because I don't want to lose it

That's why I text these things to you. So let me start with one that I sent you and this is

Right up your alley. In fact, it might have been sent to me by a listener if it was I apologize

I don't have the email in front of me

But the story is from a from the Smithsonian magazine headline

This ancient Roman board game was a mystery a lot until researchers used AI

To figure out how to play it

Charge

Charge this gate this story is the most charge story ever involves board games

Which is one of your favorites and AI technology also one of your favorites

How about that? So I want to know how old it is are we talking chess go

I mean, is this a thousand year old game? I I want to know and is it any good? I mean that's the other thing

Anybody can design a bad game? Is it any good?

I'm very very curious one of the one of the someday resurrected a frozen caveman

That played the game and they brought him to life and the first words he said were

Uh was the monopoly of our day not a very good game

No, not like monopoly

So here's so here here's the game. Can you see it on the screen there charge?

I can it's about a two inch tall round stone tablet with six pebbles of different colors on top of the tablet

mm-hmm

So that's the game and they said that it was a slab of limestone

Excavated in the modern-day Netherlands and deemed to be from ancient Rome

Since then the mysterious game has eluded historians in its understanding

But according to a study recently published by the journal antiquity

I've left my subscription laps to antiquity

Along with along with boys life and

Noted outdoorsman

According to that fancy right according to the uh the new research

They used AI to figure it out here is as I scroll down the lines that are scored

Into this thick slab of limestone

Along with some pock marks

So here's what they did to unravel it researchers began looking at other old European games

Hoping to find something similar to the carved limestone

They searched the Ludae games database charge

No, did you know there's a game?

Data base

There's board game geek which is the IMDB uh-huh board games okay and board game geek is normally considered like the ultimate game database

I don't know what what he is

I believe it take I believe it goes back to board games that are prehistoric or if not prehistoric

Their centuries old so in other words they were not a product to be sold to the masses

They were a game that was you know developed and agreed upon and they would carve out shit and move pieces whatever

So the largest comprehensible database of traditional board game rules currently available for the study

The team was looking for games. They were on a smallish

Game board on which pieces can take a maximum of 22 different positions

They said that basically by studying the where patterns

In the limestone as to where

Pieces must have gone that they sort of sorted out what the rules to the game must have been it's a long article

I'll make sure to send you a link

But give me your thoughts on this incredible story well

I it looks a lot like go uh an of an ancient game um which you move little pebbles around this board

But I think this is great and it tells you that

You know gaming is innate in our nature. It's fundamental to who we are

We want to compete we want to challenge each other

We want you want to be mentally engaged in something sure and whether it is it could be sports

It could be video games. It could be any of writing things poker

We love we love to have the social competition with our friends and it's who we are as human beings. Yeah

But look at that. I love it. Look at that game

I wonder if anyone owns it if it's owned by a museum. I wonder if there is a

trading community an auction community that seeks to own

No, seriously like when you want to own as a you as a board game geek

I would think you might want to own one of the more ancient

100 200 300 year old games

I think it's I think it's extremely compelling to be pretty cool to be able to say you've got the oldest known game in Europe

Which it might be because chess I believe is

Middle Eastern North African right go was Japanese or Southeast Asian. I'd be very I you know you

I take your I take your word I take your word for all of it because I know nothing about go or whatever

Chess fascinates me. I do not know how to play

I also don't know how to play Texas hold them and I am now one day closer to actually playing in a tournament sponsored by the local radio station

Where I'm a celebrity ad in and I've got to do some research on that so I'm not a complete tool

How did you make it to this point and not know how to play Texas hold them?

I just chose not I chose not to play because I knew I was too far behind

Everyone else and I would never be as good. So like I don't want to poor

Be good at it. You didn't want to do it. Well, I just like I don't grow up playing poker with your buddies

No, no, not really. Oh, yeah, not not really which is which is too bad

Which is too bad because it's a good social thing for men to do light light gambling as it were

So anyway, I'm a day closer to that

I told the the organizer takes who is the morning show co-host of the junkies on JFK who is the he's the poker ambassador for MGM National Harbor

The big casino resort right there outside the beltway. He's their guy. He's always doing these tournaments

And he's like, come on. Maybe you should come and do this, you know, and dead and I'm like, I'd cool

so I

I've never played and I kind of need to know a basic sense of what hands are worth staying on

Because I don't want to just I don't want to just wipe out right away

I don't want to do what I call pulling a vinko bogatage

Do you know who vinko bogatage is

No idea vinko bogatage

Was the guy who wiped out in the opening to wide world of sports in the 70s on the ski jump

On the ski jump

He's the agony of defeat the guy that just wiped out

Horribly vinko bogatage

Um, I think important to this conversation. He was a Slovenian painter

Who had just taken up. Yes, he is a Slovenian painter

Who had taken up, you know, ski jumping late in life

And because of the qualifications were a lot

Looser where I guess they're like all right Slovenia you got anyone wants to this? Oh, you do have a ski jumper

Okay, well send him

You've got you've got a guy who's willing

Apparently because he's a middle-aged painter who's like um

All right, I guess I'm willing to try that yeah, and you know, it was so crude ski jumping was so crude

Sure, then Steve that vinko what's his name again bogatage

vinko bogatage things were so crude back then did that vinko bogatage wasn't even injecting his dick with anything

Right exactly very crude sport at the time didn't try to get the

Added advantages, but yeah, he's that currently still alive by the way

Living in Yugoslavia and he would go on I'm he lived yeah

I know exactly that's half of the that now okay, we got to talk about your browser my man

Because what you just showed me was a Troche's it was a it was little tiny blocks of text

Surrounded by an add at the top and add at the bottom below the text and add

To the right of the text you what are you are you using

Microsoft edge if we wouldn't what browser are you even using that it allows you to see all that

Well, I don't serve up what they serve up. Oh, I see what you're saying. I should have pop up blockers

You should have the brave bra you and everybody listening to be on the brave

Browser and I don't think we've ever talked about this you're saying you're saying this you're saying this is what I should

This is this is the crap I should not be seeing that pop up down the corner any of that crap right

Look right there. There's this woman on the bottom who's got her I've ads the the add on the bottom looks like filthy porn

It's a woman young woman with her mouth open lying on her back and it's for sleep apnea

Okay, I

I love that you get fed sleep apnea ads by the way already already have the apnea

I've got the the CPAP so they don't need to send me this stuff

Well, they apparently they've they've figured out and also you need blood sugar out

So the brave let me tell you what brave does

Number one, it blocks all those ads. Okay, number two the brave browser. Yeah, locks all those ads who makes who makes brave

Brave makes brave

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It is what's called a chromium browser. So they took the they took the Google the chrome browser and they stripped out all the spyware

They do no tracking. They do no tracking. They store nothing

They your pages will load much much faster because you're not pulling in all the trackers and all the ads

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But here's maybe the single best reason for your listeners

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Well, whoa, whoa, whoa, I pray for that

I know you pay for I pay for any ads

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Okay, there it is. I've been using brave for 10 years. This is here is works on your phone works

Says get brave, which is a great tagline get brave. There's my download

Almost there run the installer. I'm not doing this right now, but okay

Private search built-in AI assistant powerful VPN. I pay for a VPN as well

Right, it's got web. It's got browser based VPN. It's not device based. It's browser based

But still when you can you can have a firewall and VPN and it no cost by the way. It's cost nothing. It's free

I paid for I paid for one year of my VPN at your recommendation

You know that yes, so I well, I know so do I need do I need the paid VPN and use the brave browser based VPN

Well, you don't have to use a double VPN because you already got to you've got a VPN that's working in your house

You don't need that but the everything else brave does makes it absolutely worth it feels like I'm wearing a condom my girlfriends got a

IUD in as well like we're really going over

Got the sponge the IUD and she's on the pill. I mean, how much protection do I need all that together?

Well, you're hyperveral hyperveral, so we know that you probably hyper

V-Rile, okay. All right next up you I've pitched my first pitch you give your best story available go

McDonald's

The McDonald's CEO is the talk of social media right now and it's fantastic

Um, I assume you have seen the McDonald's CEO

Extrying to extoll the virtues of the mick arch. Yes

nerdy mick nerderson

Just the most

Like if you saw this guy at a party you'd be like oh god

steer away from this tool

Because there's gonna be no fun conversation coming from this guy

Have you seen burger king clap back at mcdonald's

Which is fantastic uh now I don't know if you intend to play his little

His little the the sound clip of the mcdonald's CEO eating biting into

Taking the daintiest little nibble this little twiggy guy

Looks like just he looks like an actuary and he takes this little nibble

I did it of the mick arch and then declares it a

A great product product exactly. Yeah. No, he's getting roasted to the moon for it

Yeah, I'm not gonna play it here. I did play it with Andy Poland

Yesterday on the podcast, so I hope you don't knock me for that

But I do have this uh the burger king clap back which okay the burger king CEO looks a bit more normal

A bit more robust as just a dude's dude, right?

Okay, here he is right here. Oh very very much so great hair on this burger king CEO

And he takes a monster bite as it right there. He's got he got smuts on his lip

Oh, yeah

Yeah, which is what that's what you want to have. Yeah, absolutely

Right now what what what I would say is okay

Now for your next trick can you get non felons to work your restaurants

And maybe not have burger kings be the cedeest dirtiest restaurants of all the fast food chains

Here's the thing they don't have to be there there was a burger king by KFA and in Minneapolis

That was meticulously run and it was this it was clean it with the food tasted on a really

Different level and elite burger king. I've never been in a burger king where I'm like this burger king's elite

Look at this look how shiny is look how nice it is look how friendly the employees same

Never had same and it had all that stuff all that stuff. I was just I was astounded by this burger king now the McDonald's CEO

His first job was after he'd already gotten his MBA

As in brand management and he looks like it the burger king CEO's first job

Domino's delivery driver

He's been immersed in this from the ground up, right? I mean he's made this guy's made a career in food

And you can tell the difference. It's estrogen versus testosterone. Yeah McDonald's versus burger king

That said would you would you eat the big arch?

Does it appeal to you this particular massive double-decker beef

hamburger sandwich? Hey, don't what here's the thing the whole the whole

Value proposition of the mick arch is arch sauce

Oh really tell us what is arch sauce? What the hell's arch sauce secret? I can't tell you

Well, that's the secret sauce if they told you

It's already on the big Mac and it's a secret you can't have two secret sauces. Yes, you can

Tell us what's in mick arch sauce

No, they said we will meet your secret sauce with our own even double secret sauce

I guarantee you it's some it's some combination of ketchup

mayonnaise Chipotle seasoning and a little bit of I don't know

cayenne pepper something like that. It's a goo basically things

It's a it's a goo things that I did not know until I moved to Utah

Every time you order fries anywhere it comes with fry sauce

In Utah which in Utah everything comes automatically comes with fry sauce

It's a thing here that they do you order fries you get fry sauce

And it is what you just described. It's most it's some combination of mayo ketchup and seasoning

And it comes with everything so you you probably did not know that so there's a little Utah data point

Okay, but I want to tell you my personal story with McDonald's CEO guy

All right before you do that. Let me slip this in real quick put a pin in that

I want to hear this story about McDonald's CEO guy

Speaking of sauces. Have you seen the taco bell ad

For their new dipping sauce that is not a sauce

It's ice cream

Ice cream

What? Yes, I'm not dipping my taco in ice cream. What are we talking about?

Yes

They have an ad out now in which they have an ad out in which apparently

Oh, no, no, this is not Taco Bell. This is I think DQ

DQ ice cream

Okay, now that's making more sense. No, it was like it was like to dip your

Your so-and-call I think to dip your

Chicken tenders in ice cream

I had to do a double take on this

I'll look it up while you're telling me the story about the CEO of McDonald's guy

My wife dips fries in ice cream

Really, so this isn't this is not that far from that right

Yeah, dairy crew here it is dairy queen flamethrower

flamethrower

chicken

With ice cream dipper

It's just as if America's not getting fat enough fast enough for

Big food and junk food incorporated that they're like pedal to the metal

There you go, charge there it is right there

Look at this thing

Hey, hey fatso you want some fried chicken with something else to put in it? Okay, there you go

And here's here's your typical American this guy's got a YouTube channel

Alabama eats

Yeah, I bet it does you know what Alabama doesn't do does that guy does eat you know what Alabama doesn't do read

Or get on a treadmill, okay

Sorry, I'm the I'm the bad guy savage. Yeah, look look at this guy. He's checking. He's checking out the whole thing

It's a good time for me. I'm gonna try the ice cream the ice cream dip and this is just one of the strangest things

I've ever heard of but we're gonna try it

So ice cream

Just do it. I'm milled it up to it just do it. I like fries and that ice cream. It's always good. Well

I don't think what I'm gonna see the ice cream. Oh see that one had see that one has a meat

Jesus Christ

What are we doing people? What are we doing? All right, charge the McDonald's CEO

Um while we're just briefly on this guy because I think there's gonna bug you too if you're gonna wear the lavalier

Don't wear t-shirt because you have nothing to pin the lavalier to and pinning the lavalier to just like the middle of your shirt

Is weird charge you you have hit upon

One of a handful of things in this world that I'm convinced only triggers me

To the verge of rage and nobody else

One of the things that absolutely triggers me to the moon is basketball players

Like NBA players that have shoes that don't match the colorway of their team uniforms

So in other words a team that is red and yellow like the hawks will have a guy with lime green sneakers

And it's because the NBA players union negotiated that you're allowed to wear your own brand of shoes

And that includes your own colorways to the shoes whatever you want

And it triggers the fuck out of me. I want

Uniform colorways on the shoes for every player on the NBA court

I'd ideally like them all wearing the same brand

But I know that's a bit too far, but they should all be either you know blue and white or black and red

Whatever the case is triggers the fuck out of me the other thing is content creators

That just lazily put a giant road micro go square receiver

Right on their shirt conspicuously or even worse when they put it on their hat and they go yeah, that's good enough

Hey, listen up bitches. They make thin wired lava-lear mics. They will discreetly

Clip to right around here on your shirt

Take two extra seconds. Make it look good you suck. Okay

rant over

Obviously, I concur with both and the the shoe thing drives me nuts because it's

I appreciate the fact that you have your own shoe line that is modeled for your specific foot and just

Wanted to be it should be your you should have your team colors on it the color doesn't change anything

You're not going to dunk any worse because it's not the color scheme's not right

It's why not match the team that's paying you millions of dollars on your shoe

I think that's a reasonable request. I think the why not is just that they've negotiated this and I guess it's important to selling shoes

To be able to say well, you can tell these are Steph Curry nines because of the way they look

You know that the certain color I don't I don't know I guess okay to the McDonald's CEO story here we go

So there's the pre is a prior CEO the guy who is the McDonald's CEO from

1991 to 1997

um

He ushered in most famously the chicken McNugget successfully and after his time at McDonald's he went to

um

He went to famous Dave's are you familiar with the famous Dave's barbeque chain? Oh

I'm very familiar. I used to eat that way too much

Mm-hmm. Yeah, it's good pretty pretty good pretty good pretty pretty good pretty good. It's you know, it's chain barbeque

So true barbeque aficionados like yourself

We probably miss big bore badly up there. I do miss big bore. Yes, very

I would say that anyone who's a barbeque aficionado would kind of scoff at chain barbeque, but look for sure

It's barbeque. So yeah, I want to famous Dave's quite a bit

Okay, so uh, this is probably

20

17 18 something like that and he's now the CEO of

famous Dave's

And the Chicago radio station that I've been doing hits on for 20 years

sold a

August fantasy football training camp event at famous Dave's in Oak Park, which is where this guy lives

so

We're going I'm going on an August and they're turning a whole famous Dave's they're got the PA system all the TVs and everything around me

I'm going through picks and players and stuff like that and he's there

The CEO of famous Dave's former CEO of McDonald's ed is there

And we're chatting and as a good dude he loves sports loves sports loves NASCAR

We're talking football on the side and he's

Lincoln

He's pounded in drinks and

I get about halfway through

I get about halfway through my my bit and I look at him over and he's sitting at the bar

He has a bottle of wine in his right hand

And in his left hand is a different bottle of wine

And he is drinking from each of the bottles of what?

Back at these two fisted bottles of wine. He's he's drinking wine out of the bottle

Or is he pouring it into a bottle? Oh my god bottle

What a savage were those were those uh wine bottles and bags like he was some hobo on the street

I mean, that's crazy

Oh

Now he was there with a very young woman. I have no idea

Mrs. Ed or if it was not Mrs. Ed uh none of my business, but at by the time the things over

He's turned into I love you man

Oh

He loves me ed loves me and

At the end, he's trying to convince me

To take over the Minotanka Minnesota location of famous Dave's

He's charged

You got to run this one for me. I want you

You get that you want you to turn famous Dave's into Buffalo Wild Wings

I'm gonna give you the Minneapolis store

You do all this you turn it into a sports destination just like just like Buffalo Wild Wings

You can go run the store like Ed. I don't know. I think about running a run of famous Dave's

Then I'll get you an ASM who's gonna be great. I get you the best ASM in the in the twins. What's ASM? You go

It's assistant store manager. Okay, and you go you go run this thing. We'll do whatever you say

Budget is no limit. You just turn it into turn into Buffalo Wild Wings for famous Dave's

I decided to stay on my current career path instead

Do you regret it? I don't say that's

Um no because I don't I think in the sober light of reality

He would have probably rescinded that offer and uh turned out everything worked out okay for me with fantasy sports

My dad used to say how early on he wanted to run a taco chain that had come to the East Coast

It was not Taco Bell. It was something else and that he was serious about doing it almost and my mom used to always scoff

Whenever this came up at the dinner table over discussion, you know dad would be like oh, yeah

I was gonna. I was gonna be a franchisey. I wanted to get one of those uh, you know taco presto outfit

So over there in Arlington

I'm like I can't imagine my dad slinging tacos for a living

Well, you know, I doesn't everybody have that other weird career that's nothing like the career you have that you were always interested

Not everybody not but some people do and when they change up and they do something completely different

I totally respected. I like it. It's cool. I think we should all have a great second act in us

That is completely different than the first act

By the way, Arby's bought Buffalo Wild Wings back in 2018 for 2.9 billion

And somebody tweeted and I just saw this today. They're like the fuck did Arby get 2.9 billion

Who's buying who in this deal

I just love the way it was raised like streetlingel the fuck did Arby's get 2.9 million where that come from

Fucking Arby's fucking socks. Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa

Whoa

I'll give you a second to retract that

I've been to the Arby's I've been to Arby's one time since I moved here went through the went through the drive-through

It's Utah Arby's 18

18 dollars

Oh, okay, okay, you know, you're playing sandwich. I know you're okay

A regular size roast beef sandwich a small size roast beef sandwich curly fries in a drink 18 bucks. I know

The best thing about tiny and okay, the best thing about Arby's is you is the put down when somebody's talking crazy

Sir, this is an Arby's

Or sir, this is a Wendy's which is another good way to put it

Somebody also said today that you can pretty much track when our society

began its inexorable decline in America when the last of the Wendy's

Solariums went away

Oh, you remember the iconic restaurant style of Wendy's which had a little

Solarium seating area where you could sit under a nice little slanted glass roof and it was like all right

It's fast food, but it I feel like I'm sitting somewhere

nice ish

No, they're gone. Yes, I remember that that was and you know what

That's a pretty cool

Signature thing to have in your restaurants here. We are talking about a 20 and 30 years later

Um, but nobody does it anymore and at some point somebody came into Arby or Wendy's and went you know what

Yeah, you know, that's not adding to the bottom line

We know you know, we spend

1463 dollars per franchisee every quarter cleaning those glass Solariums are very difficult

We have to hire a company to do so. I don't see how it's giving us any ROI

What's the return on the bottom line of those Solariums?

Let's just get rid of those smaller box smaller footprint focus on drive through get rid of the Solarium

That's how societies start going down the share just because the NFL season is now firmly in the rearview mirror

Does not mean the bedding season is oh there is still plenty of opportunities to put a little something something on the games

No matter what tickles your fancy. There is still plenty of action to wet your appetite

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All right, so look I'm almost 57 years old now in fact almost 58 now been feeling more and more of it every day

You know what I'm talking about things that used to be easy just well aren't anymore

The energy is not quite like it used to be recovery takes longer

Nobody really talks about this stuff. We don't want to but here's the reality

Most men start losing testosterone around age 30 and about 1% every year do the math by the time you hit my age

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They will ask you where you heard about them

Please, please, please support the show in the zebcast by telling them I sent you

I got three NFLs things that pop today and then you're going to tell me if you're sight for the soon-to-be Kyler Murray era in purple

but three stories today of oh

eyebrow raising nature in the NFL as teams now start to get set of we're keeping him or let them go

We're going to tender him. We're going to franchise him etc etc

story number one

Tray Hendrickson says goodbye to Bengals as team declines to use the tag on him

This is going to be one of the greatest

Bungalings of a guy you've ever seen as a player because

Check me if I'm wrong

Teams are willing to give up a naked first for Hendrickson last summer

And the Bengals got all high and mighty and said it'll take two first rounders plus plus and teams like man you crazy

So they never moved him

They kept him they had a bad season

Burl got hurt now they're letting him walk you dumb fucks

No compensation for him at all nothing. It's almost like letting Sam darn a lot of you're out of your building

Goes and get nothing in return and he wins a Super Bowl

Yes, that's I think the Bengals will probably rule the day

There was a fractured relationship. There was a lot of distrust and dislike

And the Bengals for an office freaking blows. I mean no, but you know nobody ever

It's always like the whole operations always listed near the bottom of in the you know in the players report card

Sitting in the detouratory for most of the things that they do

Tray Hendrickson probably finds himself in a far better spot when this thing is all said and done

And will probably be sitting on you know another dozen sacks and he'll end up

You'll end up making a difference for some better organization

Two years ago he came off a year in which he had 17 and a half sacks

He was an all pro not a pro bowl because that shit don't matter no more all pro 17 and a half sacks

Wanted more money team was like no where the Bengals haven't you read about us?

More money is not what we do

So you said so you say while I want to trade and they go okay go ahead and see if you can get a trade

And am I wrong and in remembering

What the Bengals wanted I kind of thought that a

Naked one would have gotten it done from somebody if it was expected to be a later naked one

And the Bengals wanted more

I'm pretty sure right. I don't I don't that's how I remember it too. I saw reports today that

The team had said no to second rounders last year

I think they're asking price either was a one or was a one plus okay

And obviously you know they screwed up they look they screwed up if you if you are you should be able to look ahead one year in your crystal ball

It's not that far. Yeah, right you're making these decisions

You should know a lot of what your team looks like one year in advance

And what kind of decision making you should be having if you know you're not going to sign him trade him

I bet it's something for him. I bet they could have gotten two twos

Easily could have gotten two twos

Especially if one of the twos was kicked in the future

Let's say a two last year and a two two years from now

Fucking take it and move on. I'm either way. He was hurt this year played seven games placed on injured reserve and that's that

So that story number one story number two the Colts

Have put the transition tag on quarterback Daniel Jones

Now what's interesting about this is they haven't used no team has used the transition tag on a quarterback in like 15 years

Yeah, this is the bit where another team can come in

Match the deal and then the originating team can up it is it do I remember that it's been so long

I can look up the rules on it. You get the you get the average of the top 10 players in your position

And then the player can negotiate with other teams

And give you a better deal

Then you can go back to the original team and they have five days to match it. Yeah, how I remember this note

No, no quarterback has been hit with this tag since ESPN research began tracking such moves in 2000

So never been used not keeping only 20 players total have been given the transition tag

Most often players reach a deal with their team after being tagged so it's sort of like a time share pitch

Where they they lock you in the room. They're like okay, I don't think you're gonna sign on the bottom line

But we got to keep you're a little longer. We're gonna see a whole whole hold up don't leave just yet

But they already are looking

I think they franchise tagged Alec Pierce their wide receiver who every nerd in America on sports radio

I was like we should go get Alec Pierce. He's really underrated probably get him cheap

Well, everyone knew that he was gonna be getable and was probably not gonna be cheap was gonna be over expensive by the time

You hit the market and the Colts even said we're not even allowed to hit the market

So there you go

Cowboys elected you franchise tag

I

One last one last thing on Jones coming off in Achilles injury

You know, he had been he was eight and four as a starter

I mean, this you know remember the first half of the season the Colts were the talk of the NSF and his play was fantastic

But the Achilles injury

It's you know, it's it it hurts look at Kirk cousins

I mean, it does it really does make a difference for a quarterback more meaningfully than I originally thought it did

And you got to bake that into whether or not you know

If you're the Colts or some other team like let's just say Vikings looking for a quarterback

Yeah, Daniel Dones remember was on the Vikings that you know just 13 months ago

This is yet a you got to it's not obvious whether or not he's going to be able to be your starting quarterback at the at the beginning of the year

And that's got to be a huge factor here. And then there's this dayline Chicago veteran center drew Dalman

Who started all games for the Bears last year is only 27 years old

Had just been given a new contract three years 42 million dollars

retired

Just said you know what I didn't hear that yeah

Drew Dalman out after five years wow the Bears had just invested a good amount of money in him

And he had a really good season he was a key player on an offensive line that ranked number one in past block win rate

And fifth in run block

win rate

Wow

That's a sizable loss do we know did he say why I've not heard a reason why

But there's an old saying that a former NFL player told Andy Poland and I on our radio show once

He was Irving Fryer the former patriot. He was a red skin for one year

He said to us he goes he said you know what

Once you start thinking about retirement you're retired in the NFL. That's how it works

Other guys have retired right before reporting to training camp

Because they were just like I can't go through this again

Um

Joe panel yeah

Okay, that's when training camp was hard not now

Training camp is a freaking breeze now

Reled half as many practices. It's like three days of hitting it's and if nobody's backing out of training camp now

I don't think you shouldn't be 20 years ago Joe Panos who was an alignment for Wisconsin

He's now a agent for one of the top agencies in the NFL athletes first

He always said when he was on the radio with us on Bob and Brian. He's like yeah

I just retired right before going to camp because as soon as I started packing my stuff up and thinking about what camp is like

And how my body was feeling at the time. I'm like fucking I cannot do this

So as I come out, but I guess Dolman is at least said he's out um, you know early so the bear is gonna address it free agency

And in the draft so good for him and you know what I have no qualms about a guy retiring after just five years

If you've made enough money for your life if you don't want to keep bashing your head against guys

Whatever it is if footballing for you

retire

So should okay two things one

Should Chicago get a pro rated amount of the signing bonus back?

I think they will I think they will and I'm sure there's some language in there about hey bro

What happens if you retire?

I hope that's somewhere in the in the contract now let's talk about let's talk about the Kyler Murray future

In Minnesota the Falc or the cardinals are ready to say

We're out and they're not going to keep them

So what do you think yeah well first um that's already that is now happened and Kyler Murray has

Bid his farewell to partner fans on social media

So it's a 100% done deal as we knew it would be now if the most charitable case for Kyler Murray is

You're playing with a shitty team for a long time a bad organization surround with a bad offensive line

Mostly you haven't had good targets of throw to throughout your career. I'll be a Larry Fitzgerald for a while

I believe and I don't so you know there's some excuses you can bake in for not having enough wins and enough success for Kyler Murray

The other side of it is man what went down last year is a bad look for Kyler Murray you remember at mid season

That the play was super weird and a play in which the ball he's in shotgun the ball gets hiked into his feet

Roughly and then he gets a foot injury

Somehow we don't know how and he never plays again the rest of the year

I know and they put him on IR. I think twice or whatever and

Then the really damning part is Jacoby brisette walks in and he's just lighting up box doors. Yes

The defense was terrible so you're still losing games

But they're losing games 2835 and you know they're back and forth to brisette had moments where that offense looks so much better on

With a just journey man that it ever did with Kyler Murray

I don't know man. I don't want him in purple. I just don't I don't think I just don't think he's got

Dave that you know rank will the win rank the four unthinkable option

No, the five unthinkable options as the Simpsons once said

About the Vikings in there and their quarterback situation

rank him uh Kirk's return Kyler Murray to a tongue of Ioloah

Geno Smith or stay the chorus with JJ McCarthy

There you go those are the five unthinkable options

I need to go to sex because I would take Aaron Rogers before all though. Oh my god. Oh my god. All right hold on

I found the soundbite for you

So here is our chance to kick some ass for mother

I'm listening. Well, I've managed to raise this down to five unthinkable options each will cause untold misery

I pick number three. You don't even want to read first. I was elected to lead not to read

Number three number three

Five unthinkable options. I was elected to lead not to read

Okay, so there's so there's your unthinkable options

Do you happen did wherever you got that clip did it happen to show which season of the Simpsons that came out because it was funny

And it had to be the first like five years. Well, I tell you charge Simpsons aficionados will quickly say

Oh, it wasn't a season. It was the Simpsons movie

Oh, that was from the movie. It was from the movie. Yes, it was okay. I'm pretty sure

Somebody might be wrong about that. I'm pretty sure there's a movie. Okay, so

Give me your six unthinkable options

Well, all right, then I mean if I can't have Daniel Jones and because he's now got the transition tag

Which does not rule out the Vikings? You know, you know, it may not work out

And he's hurt

I would take if I can't have Daniel Jones, they're not going to spend a Malik Willis

His team is still in desperate cap trouble. So there's that

um

My next choice up. I don't like any of those options

I might be Kirk only be not because of my past affinity with Kirk

But only because you're not fooling yourself and at all thinking that he's your answer for the future

And you still need to you still have to come up with your answer for the future

Because I don't think it's Jay Jay McCarthy

And apparently the team doesn't either. Yeah, he's already planning for the new starter

So if that's the case at least they're not deluding themselves into thinking

Oh, Kyler Murray still got 10 good years left. We could go kind of murder

Geno Smith your case for Geno Smith is

he was

serviceable

in Seattle

And put up decent like yardage. Yes two years ago and another city ago

Another city it go right and then the Raiders wreck everything right

I mean you could just you could if you want to make your case for Geno Smith that's right

You go like okay, the Raiders destroy everything they touch. So you know, he went down with the ship on that

There are some metrics that suggest that Geno was okay last

Right. I don't know man and that's those are those are all bad

But this is see this is the thing that gets me say yeah, you you if

Everybody you get you get locked in this mindset. That's like oh, well Kirk cousins like good enough

He's not good. We got to we got to move on from Kirk. You pay him too much. You got to move on

Oh, Sam Darnold. He's not young enough. We got to move on from Sam to you got to get your guy on your rookie deal

You got to build your own rookie deal

You know, you got to get this guy in a rookie

Then you get Jay Jimmy Carthy right or any or you know or you end up with Zach Wilson or Tray Lance or

You know Carson Wentz or whatever Sam Howell. It's just

Mitch Trubisky you

so many times

You're trying to find that

franchise quarterback in the draft and it's really really hard to get it right yeah these are

Unthinkable options each will cause untold miseries

number three

Calamard is number three. Good luck. Do you ever see the

Grooton football

Academy

Short video with Gino Smith never used to do these for ESPN. He'd get a prospect in my friend

This is my friend Gino Smith

I'm saying that what kind of quarterback is this Gino Smith

You probably like what what are you talking about? I'm right here

Just just say why don't you say what kind of quarterback are you I mean are you a read option guy?

Are you a guy that can do it all? How do we use this athletic ability the best?

I don't consider myself any type of quarterback

I consider myself a quarterback who's you know got the ability to win games

Above the neck my athletic abilities

That just comes with the package. I can run the ball can run and you know scrambling pick up first downs

And you know I extend plays more than

Then I just go out then just running around like a chicken with my head cut off. So I love this man

I love what you're bringing to the table your athletic ability in the pocket you can use your

Ability to extend plays and create your advantage in the pocket. I don't see as Cam Newton a power

Wildcat quarterback to you

No, but see these were really I think instructive valuable interesting

pieces of media

That I don't think ESPN would even do anymore. I don't think the agents would let their clients do them

Because all they could do is hurt

I remember when Cam Newton at a hard time explaining why he couldn't call plays at Auburn

And that they would just have a simple signal like a green square and that meant you know power read right or something like that

I just and you know they didn't replace it. They don't have orlovsky doing these same things right

No, um, well, I don't think no not that I know of it all. No, these these were good. They these were like soon to be pro quarterbacks about to be drafted

Sitting down with john gruden to let him shape the narrative on them

In whatever way was the most entertaining or the way that gruden thought was

correct

And if I'm a if I'm a agent. I'm like the fuck we're doing this

How's this gonna help me out? No

Well, isn't there a tacit understanding that ESPN's only going to show the stuff that makes you look good right when they did these

It feels like you're gonna trust of it is all about just making the player look good

Are you yeah, but are you gonna trust potentially tens of millions of dollars on a tacit understanding

And sometimes you sometimes the editors might go out didn't make you look bad, but they don't have the polls on how it's gonna be

You know reacted to by the public

I'm just saying that's true. I'm just saying all right

Shane Lowry

Shit the bed

Sunday

Charge and I have been in this golf pool all year. It's charge put up the money. He said I just want you as my

Consigliary

I don't know anything about golf

Charges done all the legwork every week because he scouted the

You know pick sites to say here's who's good at this course and here's who could be used blah blah blah

He then just runs a couple names by me and I kind of go yeah, maybe or no

And I've had a few good calls on no like when I said don't take

Ludwig Oberg in San Diego because he withdrew the week before with the sniffles

And of course he sucked to miss the cut

win for me

Then you said what about Sam Burns at Pebble Beach and I go you know what?

I think it's time activate Sam Burns miss the cut actually just Phoenix I believe you missed the cut right

So I've been kind of hit or miss charge

Went to me this week and said

Hey is Shane Lowry still a thing on the regular tour? I go yeah, no, he's good

Wanted a Ryder Cup for Europe last fall so sure and I said, you know, it's a kind of a weak field

Down there at the cog I said go ahead, you know fly him in there and you're like okay cool

I didn't really check to see if you had entered him

But then Sunday you send a text to me with the leaderboard with Shane up by three with two holes to play and

Gugli eyes

Gugli eyes and I go oh wow I go to tell me we started him

You're like yep, we did, but then you added the problem is a quarter of the field also

Took him but still we'll take the win

And

God damn fellow Bart

You jinx oh ramma charge

What are you doing?

He's up by three I know

into 16 and

Not only did he give up the three strokes not only did he not force a playup not only did Shane Lowry not lose by one

He lost by two strokes. I know up by three with three to go. It's in that was

Absolutely epic collapse and they're showing the shop charts the t-shirts. Yeah

He's for the whole they're showing the t-shirts for the entire the all four days

And everybody's you know even the people that had drifted a little bit were not that far off

And then there's Shane Lowry's like off screened at the very edge of the screen. Here's where his shot went right

I just oh epic lost to a Niko etch of area whatever a Niko etch of area is

Was also battling with an Austin smother man

Um was also like I looked at some of the names that were in the field this week and I'm like holy shit

I've never heard of these guys

That's how weak the field was because of the way the tour schedule is so

Anyway, you sent me a a guy's tweet. He keeps a list of

Things that he has banned in anger from his sports life

This is this is a guy who goes by beating the bookie at beatinthebookie.com. Do you know this guy by the way?

Nope, I don't but you said it to me because it was funny

He said ban list update 31226 adds Shane Lowry lifetime ban

No way to get off list cemented

Then then he then he had listed in what looks like a typewriter font which makes it even funnier his full list

You ready?

I think we should all keep lists of these guys are on my list

There was a wrestler. I believe they used to say

You're on the list

Okay, here we go any and all Canadian golfers

Hardrock bed Daniel burger Josh Jacobs organ in the football playoffs 50 50 raffles what

I love 50 50s

Golf cards driven on the highway people who can't handle roundabouts temple athletics

Temp Texas A&M football and male cheerleaders

Gino Smith and Tyler Lockett be John Robinson one TV scorer Jake Moody and the Niners Jason Myers Seahawks kicker

Dave Aranda

Jacksonville Jaguar's organization

Cory Connors

Cory Connors a golfer and a Canadian

Multiple time offender Tyler Bass Buffalo Bills and championship games St. Mary's Virginia basketball herb Jones West Flagler associates

Mitt Romney Charlie Strong do San Bears Brian Hoyer Al Golden Mani Diaz Mark Denofrio Subway Sub's Matthew Pavon

Nitrogen sportsbook Ricky Fowler parentheses multiple time loser and Denny McCarty son of a bitch

What a list this is everybody who is wronged him in every situation. Oh my god. All right charge

Canadian golfers

Can I confirm them yeah like a void Canadian golfers

They're not the most draped in clutchness I wouldn't say

You know there have been good ones who have won Mike Weir won the Masters

Believe he's the only Canadian to have won a major

But after you won the master as you just kind of

Just kind of fizzled. Yeah, didn't do much

All right, I got this as a treat for you on the way out the door. You ready

This is an email from a listener

Let me uh, let me get this here. I closed it out

Alternate Utah

In fact, you already know this Eric prime

Thank you Eric. He says

Zabe I just don't think you realize how important the Utah song is to all of us

It isn't just a song about a state. It's a song about the rebirth of charge as he begins a new life in a properly governed state

He said I took the liberty of asking our mutual friend grok if there were any alternate versions

Of that iconic banger and guess what you can bet your ass

There are

See link below

So I give you the

Alternate version. There's multiple ones. I've pulled from audio. This is the blues version of it

Gotta be better. No ready better

Can you hear this right now?

Charge can you hear this? Yeah, baby

Yes

Sure is

This is the place

Let's hear for a i baby. Hey the a i version is a blues. It was way better. 10 times better

Do you think sweet do you think a i made this?

100% oh really

How do you know?

Well first because you said there are multiple

There are multiple different genres right so you can just feed the lyrics

Into a couple of different uh song programs a i programs and say okay. I want a blues version

I want a rockabilly version. I want a jannon dean version mental. We'll just do it

You know as funny as that i believe the words are this is the place and then Utah

This song puts the emphasis the landing note on this is the place

Which i don't hate as an interpretation, but it's a lot different than the original version right

That's because that's because the a i doesn't know the original version somebody do our email or eric

Just sent just put paste in the lyrics it so it doesn't have a basis for knowing the original

Okay, let me stop it right there. I believe it should it should have right after that a little subtle follow-on of Utah

By the way, Zayn Vegas is coming up. Charge is super excited. I'm excited

If you want more information on how to join us

Come on just email me at zaynbadi.io.com. I'll send you the relevant information

And uh, I'm just so glad that you're gonna meet some other friends of mine also Tim Murray our friend from vison

There you go right here

Utah

It's like it the Utah belong sooner there. This is the place

Resolve

Utah is right there should be right there

Hey, why don't you make your own song y'all ball do you can't even sing okay fine fine fine

All right again, it doesn't have the originals of reference point because it's a i

It does say Utah, but it waits for the next chorus to resolve

Utah

Don't you think don't you think it belongs right there?

Yeah, okay, it does and you could you know with enough effort

You could make that happen it with the AI as well

Much like playing Texas. Hold them. I'm putting no effort into either Texas. Hold them or

Rewriting this cheesy song yet another time

Charge is always a joy and a pleasure. Thank you my friend. We will talk to you next week

Talk to you in a week. Bye

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