Incel Interior Decorator

0:00Late Night Bites with Friends? Already hard to beat. That first two-hot bite of fries you couldn't wait for, followed by ice-cold Pepsi. Now, that hits different. Suddenly, the energy kicks back in. The night goes longer, and the laughs don't stop. Because Pepsi brings out more flavor, more fun, and more of the moment. Food deserves Pepsi. Grab a Pepsi Zero Sugar today. We had our friends, we spoke with our friends, and they had a little submission over at part of my take. I want you to hear this. Put on your headphones. It's an interesting, interesting thickening the plot over here, maybe. Let's hear it. Andrew Centino, bad friends, great show. Out on all platforms, Apple Spotify, YouTube, great guy, and Centino, shout out to him. All right, so I won't get into details, but if you were to say you can't pick Bobby or Andrew Centino as your favorite parts of the bad friends podcast, what would be your third favorite, or one favorite? First favorite.

1:00I'll go with the fancy in the booth. Shout out to him, great guy. He's a film producer, does a fun video. Who else is in the booth? Film producer? I think that's a good man. That's probably that. All men. Yeah, a lot of men in the booth. Yeah. Shout out to the booth. Do they have any producers? They got recurring guests. I think Delaney who plays in the band on Kiltoni is recurring once upon a time. What about the girls obsessed with eating on crustables that we could maybe have you go out on a date? No, she sits on the inflatable couches. That's not the booth. Oh, great show. What did you guys put out? Should I check it out? It's great show. I don't know. She loves on crustables. I will say great snack choice. Yeah. On crustables, fantastic sandwich. You have great eyes. I've got to, I actually have a, I don't know if I have any more, because I did move. I did have an uncrustable puncture, so I could make a crustable at home. Oh, you had your own? Yeah, they make ones you could just punch them out. Fuck yeah. Yeah, so you could do with ham and cheese and peanut butter and jelly. Sounds like you guys would make a great couple. I, I, great show.

2:01They run a great program. Oh my God, he likes you. He likes you. He likes you. He really likes you. He got scared. That is true. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We are. We got to do a call. Pause it on him. Yeah. Pause it on him. It's fat Andrew. Thanks for being a bad friend. You don't know fat Andrew? This gentleman has a big crush on you. Yeah. And he's, he's perhaps shooting his shot is what I feel like it is. That's what it feels like. He's a really nice kid. I met him. So uncrustables, you like them? I don't even know that. There's an uncrustable in the house. She ate them on the bird pod when those guys came on the show. That's right. She ate like six on camera. Okay. There he is. So here's Zach right there. Awesome. Would you go on a date with Zach perhaps, Rudy? That could be. He's, I like his eyes. You like his eyes. That's a good start. That's what I call it. Are you interested in maybe going on a date with this man? If we set this up the guy on the left, he's got a big, big crush on you. He was too shy to say it to me when I met him. But now we know the truth. Maybe. What does he do?

3:01He's a producer for that show, for part of my take. He's a producer and he's very good at job. Unlike the producers that we have on this show. I like the Hammond cheese idea. You like the Hammond cheese uncrustable idea. Yeah. So this is something we can move forward on. Perhaps if we can get emerging of maybe, where does he live this guy? Cargo. It's not going to work. I think it is. She doesn't like winter. We'll travel for love is what Zach said. Okay. So that's him on the right. Cool guy. Cool guy. Press as well. Good style, smart, sweet, funny, very funny guy. So what do we think? Rudy, can we maybe do a date? Yeah, maybe. We love Zach very much. He's the man. And maybe we'll set up a little date for you guys. Because you might like him. His style is cool. So is that a yes? Yeah. Wow. You two are bad friends. You are these two idiots. I'm a bad friend. Welcome to another episode of Bad Friends. I'm your captain, little robber, young Lee. And I'm on the shore saying pick me up. Pick you up. And I'm going to pick you up as soon as the fog.

4:02Woo. Exactly. Hey, can we go to an ICP show at some point? Woo. I want to get sprayed with fego and get soaked in sugar water. Have you not seen these concerts? They look so fun. I want a whoop whoop, dude. Whoop whoop. You know who ICP is? Handbook up. What? What's ICP? Well, I got it. It's closely related to urinary track infections. Is it? That's ICP. That's the insane clown posse in the shows are all over the internet again. Yeah. Because they spray everybody with fego. It's exhibit number one. Can we go to? Pop. It's soda. Soda pop. And that's fine. That's fun. Yeah, it's fine. They're spraying everybody with soda pop. And they all wear make up. I do grape. I was at this. Yeah, yeah. I'm not. You were orangeed up on this. Fanta. I was here. Yeah, yeah, he was fanted up on this. I was playing a show in DC and someone goes, there's an ICP gathering at the.

5:03A new reflecting pool. Dude, no, this is back in the day. This isn't recent because they went there before and I went and I was there. I was there. I got you T either. You're in a you're in a track infection. ICP in St. Clampos. You never heard of them before? No. Well, Rudy Jules is back on the show. Give it up. Yeah, and I want to say welcome back and I live with her and I, you know, she said, what does she say when your mom left? That clean. You're going to clean. You're going to do everything that she's done, right? Let's go to the. All the towels. All that. Can we go to exhibit number one? This is this is my fridge. Okay, this is my fridge and my fridge is supposed to be stacked with sugar-free red bowls, diet coke and balls of water. And what we got here exhibit A is an ice doom on the side. All right. So we got one of those ice dunes that you love and then, um, yes, so nothing in there. Um, except number two, please.

6:03No towels. This is supposed to be packed with towel. That's fake. It's not fake. I restock your towels all the time. Too late. Too late. I feel like you just take out the towel. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. You used to do many towels. Exhibit number three, please. You went from A to two to three. You know what this is? Uh, warts, footwarts. It's a very close. Yeah. Yeah. It's, she let Julio out when my girlfriend was over. So we're supposed to coordinate Julio goes eight shit crazy and bites her and bites her in the fucking foot and she starts crying. Can I be honest? It's, it's, it's small. It's not that bad. Yeah, yeah. That's, that's her fault. No, that's not her. Julio's rabbit. You know that going into it. No, but she's supposed to, I've been coordinating. It's just, it was so quiet. I thought like, oh, they're, we eat quiet. They always, yeah, right? We eat quiet. Always love it. Yeah, but at times we are quiet. Usually you would be like, oh, we're at the, that's not my, no, I'm not, dude, I'm not.

7:05I have no, what you could just say, oh, you're the IRGC, okay? All right, you're going to act the way you're going to act, right? But I don't like it. That's not bad. It's a bad reference. It's IRGC. That's a bad reference. But, uh, what is that? I don't know. What? The Iranian Revolutionary Guard Corps? They got that right. The Iranian Revolutionary Guard. Are you watching a lot of face the nation? How do you, is lava? Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps, the IRGC? The IRGC, yeah. So I got close. I'm tuned out of all this. I know you are. Not even remotely interested in the other. Yeah, but they're involved. My point is, is this, okay, that you made my girlfriend cry. I know. I was so sad. And I wanted a public apology for that. Well, here's the time. We're on public, we're on public. Yeah. I hear one of my things already. What? Because she's my girlfriend. Apologize to me and I'll relay the information to her. I've always said sorry so many times and she said it's okay.

8:08Yeah. She just cried because Julio was, it was so traumatic. Hmm. I saw it. Nobody likes to get bit by a dog. Yeah. Yeah. Nobody likes it. I mean, nobody likes to get bit by a dog. Yeah. This is not a fun thing that happened. It's not a fun thing that happened. And people who don't have control of the dogs don't stock the towels and don't stock the red. What say you? Should feel better. What say you? I stoon. I'm going to be in his house every week. It's just I can't do it every day because I'm also babysitting. And he wants me there 24 seven. Who are you babysitting? I mean, she's also babysitting you a little bit. So it's kind of, it's a baby and a real baby. She, he doesn't know how to clean the dishes. It's like there's shits stains everywhere. Yeah. There's like blood stains from. From my girlfriend. From you. Yeah, not a bloodstates from my girlfriend from her foot. From being bit by a dog. Yeah, yeah. There's a lot. And like I'm also babysitting. So I tell who you babysitting for? Esther's baby. Exactly. Exhibit B, dude. Exhibit B?

9:09Yeah, yeah. Or exhibit two. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, it's two or B. Yeah, it's two B. So what say you? We're not. We're not, we're not two B. Two B. Two B. Two B or not. Two B. Unless coming home. I don't care. Wait, your mom's coming back? Oh, she has to. All right. The love on my life is back. Yeah, I'm going to take her on a nice restaurant. Yeah, you know what? She's going to live with me now. She's going to live with me and my wife and she's going to be, and you know what? I need her, dude, because she's doing shit. No, yeah, I need her, dude. No, we need that. I'll take her. I'm taking her. You cannot see my Filipino. Yes, I can. Yeah, yeah. I got on discount. Do you have a contract? Do you have a contract with him? No. No, well, okay. You ought to get a lawyer, dude. You've never paid rent. Oh, my God. Have you? No. Exactly. Free car, no rent. Who pays for your phone? I don't know. You pay. Exactly. You don't know that. I do know.

10:10I just got it. You got the bill. Yeah, yeah, I got it. I just got it. Yeah, I do. Yeah. What else is going on in life besides you not stocking the towels in the fridge? Just babysitting, getting puberty. How many babies? Two. Extra as two kids now. Yeah. Can you let them? No. He will never be them. Why? Because he doesn't have a sphere. Do you even get there? I don't have a what? That's fear. I don't know. A sphere? I've never met her babies. They're really cute. Yeah. I don't know when, well, how do I meet people's kids? It's like a, when do you come over to my house? No thanks. I just don't want to... I have like pool parties at my house with kids. Like I meet his daughter because he brings her here. If Esther came on the show and brought her kids, I'd know. Yeah, but if I have a date, like I have like a pool party, you know, with all the kids, which I do. Not going to that. I go to adult pool parties. I know. Well, that's the problem. That's your problem. Why? Because Collada has a baby, comes over. Daddy, you should come. No, put it in the cage. Don't you lock those things up, put some bananas in there, and you can walk away for a

11:12couple hours. White kids? That's what you do with whites. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You lock them up and you go, no Brandon. Yeah. No. And then you go do whatever you need to do. Yeah, Chad. Chad. Sit. Yeah. My parents used to leave me in the apartment and go to the bar around the corner and I'd look at them out the window, walking to the bar. I want a white kid. You just leave it. You do? You can leave whites. And you're going to go climb the cliff. They love the climb the cliff. We're big cliff climbers. Yeah, you can jump it off. Latch key kids. Latch exactly right. That's what we are. Yeah. Latch key kids. I was a latch key. Were you? I was a survivor. I was a survivor. Yeah, yeah. We're out in these streets. I were on the streets. The little mentors who... The mashed potato gang. They threw mashed potatoes at you. You fed them. I knew for sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got to jump into school by a guy in a station wagon with his wife who could have easily been childhood doctors. We just got put in. They were like people in the neighborhood. Yeah. Not good. We had no homeless. This is when I was in Chicago. So we had homeless. Yeah.

12:12Growing up, I had no homeless. Right. Yeah. And then when I first saw one, it was like star, star, star. What do you want to hug him? It was like running into Canada. There were two homeless people that were on the news. They were boning right up the street from here. Yeah. They were boning. Because when you don't grow with homelessness and then you come to LA and you see it. Shocking. It's great. Oh, you like it. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like Voldemort. Well, you heard it here. If you're a homeless person, you need somewhere to live. We'll put up a Bobby's address down below. I poke it. Yeah. I poke with. Yeah. You poked one? Yeah. I didn't think it was real. A homeless person? Yeah. And I went, you're so highly would. It's so real. You think it's all part of... Yeah. Casting the same thing. I was all about it. AI Movie Magic. So you're just babysitting. That's all you're doing. Yeah. Good. Pull the mic closer to your mouth. It's been a long time. It's been a long time. Oh, she doesn't have the headphones on so she can't even hear that she can't. Yeah. Yeah. Don't put it on. It's fine. You don't want to ruin your hair. You don't want to ruin your hair. She had some romantics. Romantics? Yeah.

13:13What happened to that guy? You were dating that guy. That's long gone. Yeah. He just came back. Guava guy? He came back into the picture? The Belgium guy. What happened with that? He came back. Did he not come back? He came back and that's it. Yeah. Oh, so you're dating again? No. No, that's over. No. Oh my god. It's not over. Friends with benefits. No, it's just... Are you playing the fifth? It's just something. What if Fauci? Yeah. How the fuck did you let that happen? Yeah. How did you let that happen? Yeah. What is it? We're just talking. It's not like there's a label in it. Yeah. Labels are hard. Sure. But especially in that age range, they don't fucking... They don't know. Yeah. You're a generation. You don't even know how to do it. Yeah. So if he texts you now to hang out, you're going to hang out or go, no, no, no. Yeah, but he's in Belgium. So, at home, he's... I thought you said he came back. He came back last two weeks ago.

14:13To hang out with her. Do you stay at your place? No, they get it. She pays for an Airbnb. No, he did. Okay. He did. All right. I don't have money for that. You make you waffles? I mean, that's the thing. Yeah, they love it. They love strawberries and waffles. Yeah, he's a white, though. Yeah, he's handsome. Shocked at you with the white. Yeah. Straighter. Yeah, straighter. After all this shit, you talked about the white. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now you're back with the white. Not that white. All right. I don't want to hear about that. Yeah. You like babies? I'm okay with them. She's good at them. I would never hand you a baby. No, she's so good with babies. Oh, my God, they love her. Doubt it. Yeah. Yeah, she's like the Filipino version of that one girl. Hi. Hello, Timmy. Who's that guy? Miss Rachel? Yes. Okay. I call her that one girl. Yeah. Yeah. She needs the kids to love her. They do, huh? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

15:13Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I don't know. They feel good. They feel safe around you. Maybe. The babies. Auntie, Auntie. But I got lady to like me. Oh, my God. Who's that? Oh, my God. You have no idea what I did the other night? What? It was it was like Laura the Ring stuff. Adventure. I'll tell you that. Where did you go? In my house. I went to my house. And I. Small adventure. It's a small venture. They have a new dog lady. That's right. You said you know lady. Yeah, they named it lady. Yeah, and then I had to Really stretching the bounds of they are it's a guy though, right? He looks like lady from the town lady in the town. Oh, that's original Yeah, yeah, hack. No, but that yeah, she does look like that cute dog cute dog. So um the other day out she was gone Right, and so this is what I do now she leaves them in the spare room So when she's gone for a long time, well, I'll I'll transfer the dogs into her room He never listens to me. He's so incompetent. It's like crazy

16:18And the reason why I put her in it because it gives her a time tick Because if she's if you don't get if you don't get home the dogs are gonna poo and pee on your bed Yeah, that's good. It's good. It's a lesson learned. It's a lesson learned. So I keep them in your room Always be at the house Get home soon because they're gonna put on your peon your bed I'm just gone for hours and then you you react like I'm gone for the whole day No, that's that true or not you you said you got a couple red stuff it I can look into game what time now Eight those are the four hours. Guess I wait when you're gone. Yeah, dude. You're so smart God you got on walk. I'm telling you I'm telling you you need to free yourself from this prison I Tell him I'm leaving at six. I'll be back around like 11 10 11 and then he acts like I'm gone for the whole day And then he never listens to me and then the dogs shit everywhere in my room and he's like that's what you get That's what you get that's what you get the irony being it's your house

17:20But not not all my dogs, but it's your home exactly so the poop is still inside of the home I understand so this is kind of a double-edged room sure It's a horror room inside of a home that you own. Yeah, so still your house when it moved when you move out Yeah, the poo house is still your house. I know then I do a deep plant Right and also gonna say this the other day I made a very nice spectra goal in your bedroom where the cat cats vomit on it and all the trouble of ants that went to you and do Yeah smart. Yeah, that's a little extra flavor that I put in there what I told you don't let the cats inside the room And you left the door so wide open. Yeah, and then there was so much vomit and You're like the guy who lights the house on fire with his family in it and you stay in the house. Oh, yeah, you don't leave I have to know too. Yeah, you have to go down with the ship. I want to those guys. Yeah, I'm finding because the heat We have baby lizards are in the house now. They found their way in yeah, but I keep the problem was I keep trying to get them outside I don't want to kill them. Yeah, so I keep trying to like scoop them in the cups because if you grab them

18:22They're so sensitive. I tried to grab one the foot fit. They're so quick, right? Well, it's foot fell off Really no, they they they they they loot they can regrow stuff. What are you ripping feet? I want to grab it with my hand like this But they're so sensitive. They're not good for touching it. It's foot fucking came off Wow, and then my wife was like it's foot off and then I try to grab it again And I felt like another piece of it fell off. Yeah, and so at this point I sandal flicked it out because I'm trying not to kill it Yeah, you killed it in jet and yeah, while he's limeless now You do it limb by limb I call it we call him lieutenant Dan when he comes back The poor fuck though. I've this is the third lizard we found in the house. I've tried to get out They're so small and quick, but he said because the the the pool guy said It's because of all the heat that they're trying to come inside Yeah, I would say that Keep them in listen here poo room. Yeah, yeah, I don't want the lizards in the house because then other animals are coming in If the lizards in there that means other animals are in it's a different house situation. Yeah, we don't have poo inside of our house

19:23Like fly We poo outside. Yeah, they have high ceiling. Have you been to his house? We dug a pit. Yeah, yeah, we have high ceiling Regular ceiling no, you have high ceiling. They're like this. No, they're mentioned The Bobby said you have a man. He would say that. Yeah, you do have a mansion. It's a regular house Carlos has been to my house Not a regular house. It's a regular house. Is it like your house? Growing up no now he lives in an apartment exactly. It's not like your house. Well, a house in an apartment is not the same thing Got you're getting very defensive. It's it is sure. They're both fucking you know lodgings Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm not a broad normal nice house. Yes, it's a normal nice house. I really cuz a normal I okay I really don't get into this you live in the hills. So cut it the fuck out. All right, Hollywood Hills guy. Who are your neighbors Corral? Yeah, shut the fuck up. Okay, Hollywood your bird Bert Christher he lives nowhere near me. What are you? It's flatland though. Oh, we live in the flats. Yeah, so we're flatland guys You guys are flatland we're flat we're flatland people like you your flatland people just for face. Why don't you just Why don't you just get your own apartment just get your own apartment? Well, I need an actual

20:27Work like job then he'll give you some money. No, I'm not you should give her some money just clean my house She can't I'm cleaning your house. I can't just tonight. Oh, no, you're going out You act like I gotta clean every hour you act like I gotta feed the cats every hour I can't do that Did your girlfriend Is she staying at the house a lot or no? You two does yeah, does she do it? She's sleeping over more than nights more nights than not. She's now it's getting there like do you think you'd move it? She'd move in is that getting to a close point because we are this is kind of that time. It's been what Over here. Yeah, yeah, no, it's not that time good It's yeah, you have no idea what you're talking about she should move in. Yeah, I think she should move in It's been a year. There's no time like today, and I'm gonna say this okay. You're 55 years old It's not it's not dude that that Like okay, like sands through an hourglass. I have no idea. So are the days of our lives. Yeah, yeah, that's exactly right And let me tell you something these days

21:30Yeah, and that's why I don't want to do it. Oh, have her move in no, no, I wanted to live with us You do you love her. Oh, she comes in you're out Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, if you're yeah, no if she's in you're out That's okay, cuz she's the best and then where you gonna go? I take a life Okay Good luck sleeping You have a nice room now. Yeah, you don't you? Yeah, you're down stairs, aren't you? No upstairs? Oh, and also I redesigned a room Oh, you did Interior design. Oh, be careful what you wish for Yeah, what it's like what? It just looks like an in-cell room You living in it Why is there no windows? It's just dark like yeah, the walls are that's not in cell darkness. It's not in cell Yeah, yeah, it is Bring up a i in-cell room. I guarantee it's just a dark room with a computer and a plate full of food and empty cans That's not in it's a room. Yeah, that's an in-cell room. No, that's what this one that one there it is

22:33That's your room looks like that. Yes, no, it looks more like go go up Yeah, the first one It looks more like that. Yeah, dark like that. Yes, it does dark like that Dark walls yeah, and that's your fucking living room. How's high ceilings? That's my living room. I've just had one target on the wall Yeah, and a bunch of different blankets that don't matter. That could have been us. That is us That's us in our in our core. Yeah, so two nights ago I went to go see a Coretet play Michael Jackson's greatest hits It was amazing a cellist a piccolo a violinist and a monkey Go do a bar. Well bubbles Bumbles was there. Yeah, bubbles played. He better. It was amazing. That was incredible It was hard to not sing along You forget how many songs that you're like I know every one of these lyrics off the walls great album thriller That you just know every lyric like you it's just tell me if you want to tell me any what Tell me if you want to any tell me if you want to

23:35Annie you've been bit by smooth criminal you got bit by smooth criminal Your girlfriend Any don't you okay any don't you want day I don't want day Annie you've been bit by smooth criminal Yeah, that's exactly what that's exactly what it is, but I love it There was it yeah, he Mikey Mikey Skyped in to the show That was in a um A minute black movie. Yeah, a minute back too. Yeah, that was what that screenshot is from I'm slow so nothing new in your world other than babysitting you're just babysitting Yeah, what's your career going to be now now that you're free and clear of all schooling? No, I still have to go back to school. Wait, I thought you'd done. No, she's in school graduate school Oh, that's right. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, what's your degree in hotel financing? Gonna buy hotels What is it business management? Huh environmental health, but I think I'm just gonna switch it to nursing

24:40Like a good old Filipina. Yeah, yeah, you're you're going to hate That job that fastest way to get um a job immediately. Yeah, yeah, but you're going to hate that job I know you're working. I was working a podcast after that. Yeah, was Kalala nurse. Yeah. Yeah, she was training Yeah, the Kali her sister at the Kowin. Yeah, yeah You got to be a nurse. It's in your blood Yeah, but she's I can't wait for first day And she's gonna come over. I'm gonna go see you're you're gonna hate it. You're gonna hate it I'll just work for like two years and then I'll just no you have no retire at job You're gonna make enough money to retire for two years. You're gonna be running back to podcasting Ethos I just got life insurance Thankfully and thank you to ethos for doing that and the best part was I applied super quick and I can and I did it online because back in the day They used to like have you go see a doctor or you had to go to their appointment or someone that they set up and now That's out the window baby. You can do this all comfortably from your own home your car your office

25:41Wherever you are because ethos makes getting life insurance so easy ethos makes getting life insurance fast easy and 100% online You can get a quote in seconds applying minutes and you can get same-day coverage with ethos There's no medical exam you just answer a few simple health questions you get up to Three million in coverage some policies are as low as three dollars a month and you'll get a your lowest rate from their network of trusted carriers Let me tell you some as low as $30 a month is extremely good in this day and age ethos says rated very well 4.8 out of five stars on trust palette over four thousand reviews and I'm telling you if you are Like us getting a little bit older and looking into the future Take 10 minutes to get covered today with life insurance through ethos you can get your free quote at ethos.com slash bad friend That's ethos ET H-O-S dot com slash bad friends application times may vary rates may vary trust pilot rating as of 612 2025 Mountain It's not fall until you get out there and get some dirt on your boots when you do

26:41Grab a pack of mountain-do the American original It's exactly right mountain-do is born the foot of the Tennessee mountain-do is made for a damn good time outdoors Don't have to be out there by the way. I like drinking mountain-do inside my home But why not get out touch grass. It's the fall rake some leaves grab a can of mountain-do crisp. It is crisp Yeah, it is it's been facing great since 48 citrusy. It is quite good man. Yeah, it's got it's specific essence It's distinguished you understand it when you know it. It's refreshing. I understand it completely 1948 two brothers created mountain-do deep in the foothills of tea eat double any double S double Lee why not grab yourself a mountain-do today get out there enjoy the outdoors with mountain-do an American original tasting great since 48 from hanging out around the bonfire to just hopping into your friends truck Get outside and enjoy a mountain-do my friends look for mountain-do in stores near you Shopify, we have an online business here at bad friends We wouldn't use anything but the best and Shopify has helped us sell our merchandise

27:43Well, here's why they said they help the setup and the checkout Shopify is all in one It's so simple. It's so easy and here's the other problem when you are setting up a business no matter what you're selling online There are so many other elements that you'd rather not have to take care of and Shopify makes it easy They do everything to help you start selling including The day one out the box experience. It makes it so simple and easy. I don't know why you don't use them Yeah, you know you don't have to be spending time fixing mistakes You want to be spending your time in the sun enjoying These precious moments with the people that you love and you know what that shop pay feature is incredible It's so so wonderful and easy and they shop five they power millions of businesses all over the world from household names Like Mattel and Jim shark small businesses just getting started like us over here at bad friends If you're ready to stop putting off your business and start hearing Kitchen then you're ready to force Shopify start your free trial at Shopify.com slash bad friends today You heard him right start your free trial today at Shopify.com slash bad friends at Shopify.com slash bad friends

28:45Watch the audacity the next time we talk Say louder into the mic just watch the honestly the next time we talk about it. So Andreas texted me What is and there was available tickets for Because I went a fit I went fishing two nights in a row. Yeah, that's not it Oh, it's not no. Oh, I thought that's the honest. That's not the other day. No I went fishing for tickets and all of the 70 mills are totally sold out except the iMacs is there's a few but first row Yeah, all right find me find me that you want to go? Yeah, find us and iMacs ticket buy it now for your four You put six in there. Yeah, but the problem is that when though. That's really hard because I'll tell you why because it's going till September 12 So we can wait until I get back from Australia get it. I'm buying it now. Okay, I'm working right now Yeah, we will we'll buy him, but you're not gonna buy him he will I will right after the show. Okay, 70 mill 70 millimeter. I'm at iMacs I'm max. Yeah, I'll pay for it. I'm Australia and Hawaii

29:48We'll do it. I travel in man. Yeah I'm a traveling man Middle-Ala Country road Take me home. Yes, to the west place where I found I belong West Virginia Ver Carol Mountain mama Take me home take me home country road Do you know who sings that song John Denver? Thank you Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Was that me? No, I was looking this way one trivia. I know Yeah, yeah, do you know that song? Yeah, yeah, no she thought you know you don't see it Take me home. Yeah, West Virginia. Yeah, yeah, yeah, country road country road. There's no Colorado in it Colorado in the song it's it's it's West Virginia. It's about West Virginia. Yeah, but there's no Colorado There could be yeah, yeah, yeah, see if there's Colorado in that song Ha ha ha Almost heaven not at all

30:49Okay, zoom in There's heaven and West for country roads take me home to the place where I belong West Virginia mountain mama not Colorado That's what I just told you. Yeah, you already said that. Sorry my bad. I don't ever read it You know, I just memorized the songs like the Annie one. Yeah, you do what they do in Japan where they do phonetics They just I love phonetics where they where they just figure out what they think it sounds like that's crazy If you're seeing that when they do concerts from people from American they don't begin to English But they genetically understand all the other. That's how I sung all my life. Yeah, I know Yeah, I know. Yeah, Annie are you okay? Yeah, Annie are you okay? What's going on with Annie? She's not okay. She's not I know I know that from the lyrics, but is she hurt? It's it's it seems like it he's asked her so many times if she's okay at this point. Yeah, how many times she asked her oh my god Do type in how many times did Michael Jackson ask Annie if she's okay? Yeah, yeah, I mean I let's take a guess I would say She's okay 24 times I would say it's 50 some odd times. Yeah 40 times or in the middle. Yeah, yeah

31:50Annie are you okay? I'd say Annie Annie are you okay? Are you okay? Annie? And yeah, are you okay? It's so hard to say Annie are you okay? Yeah, is that what the lyrics are look like me. Yeah. Yeah. Sorry. And are you okay? So are you okay? Are you okay Annie? Yeah, that's a lot. I don't think that's that hard to say. Say it. Annie are you okay? Annie are you okay? Are you okay? That's what that's what it says. This is Annie are you okay? So Annie are you okay? Yeah, but it's so is not in the rhythm of it 20 it go. So any were you okay? Are you okay, Annie? Oh, yeah So any so I got it. So any so any are you okay? Are you okay, Annie? You've been hit by you there it is. That's it you've been struck by why'd you say hit? Because it goes you've been hit by you've been struck by a smooth criminal someone with such musical talent that you have I have no musical credible. You had done how to read music okay or lyrics or lyrics it I don't know what's going on today. I don't like it. It's a wild little day. It's a wild. Yeah, I'm lost

32:53So your life's not exciting. It is exciting. She gets looking she looks forward to him when she comes she gets lucky I'm off today. What are you saying she gets looking? Brain is off like with his vocal cord. Yeah, something's wrong. Yeah, you like it. It's like you need to be reconnected It's like they fucked up the wires. Yeah, like they put one towards the other thing and they're like shit That was there are our Q wire. Okay. I apologize. Let me get back into office. No, fine. Let me grind it I think I'm gonna take a gab. Yeah, take a gab. Yeah, I'm gonna take a gab a bit of a nerve inhibitor a nerve Are those ballet shoes? Yeah, yeah, are you in ballet now? No, it's just your ballet. It's just a trend right now Yeah, is it a quote is that a popular thing now? Yeah, ballet fluts. How do you know that because skimsassin they have them How could you keep up? You know, it's funny when she sings in the kitchen and I try to join she doesn't like it Yeah, yeah, you and ESA do this where you go

33:58It's real time Sabrina Carpenter yeah, whatever. Yeah, and then she's chopping things right You know that's how do you want to know in real time? It's chopping away, so then I'll come in and I'll go are you ready to have a good time too? Yeah, the backup right the backup as she goes stop it Tito poppy You know don't sing with me. Why do you guys do you know you let him sing? It's just his energy. Yeah, it's better. Singing energy No, it's not and then it's like and then you'll know where to even tell me who's singing Like what are you singing? You know, as the song yeah, who sings that do you want to have a good time? Here here Do you want to have a good time? You know that song go go here we go. We don't ever want to know

35:06That could be a song sounds like a song. I really don't I know it does you sang purple rate. I did Yeah, I went like this. I would purple rain purple rain Yeah I see why she's with you. Yeah, yeah, I think that I'll tell you that right now. Do you ever hum to yourself? I sing to the dog a lot. What do you sing? Just make made up songs. Yeah, that's what I just did, but I to the dog. Say so I'm the dog who? I'm the dog. Oh What? Someone in the well. Oh, what's wrong? Swing song song song. Oh, what are you? You want a song? Oh, he's asking I sing songs don't you sing songs to the dog sing me a song fuck face my little sweetie sweetie pup Is my sweetie sweetie pup we go outside and have the treats and And she's my sweetie sweetie pup

36:09We went swimming yesterday. It was so fun, dude. Oh, she goes in the water. She jumps on me If I'm if I'm like sitting on like a raft none of our animals do that. They won't go on you or near it No, they don't like the water Well for a long time she was freaked out. You know why we used to have at the old place We had one of those like um solar covers that goes over the pool to keep it warm in the winter And she a ball went on it and she jumped on the solar cover because it looks like it's stable It's quick sand to them. She sunk into it. Yeah, they don't like it and our friend Jeff dove. I mean like Because we're all hanging out outside and I see it out of the corner of my eye and he's already like Superman parallel like mid flight diving but did it collapse on itself and drowned. No, no, no She's alive. You've seen my dog. Yeah, but grab their out of it. It was fucking unbelievable. Yeah, he was a savior He was a hero. He was a hero that day. We salute him every time we see him. Who your your friend my friend my buddy I say yeah, I would have never jumped in. Thank you Jeff. No, you would for your dog for any for your dog I mean, oh you okay. Yeah, that's self. I would have watched you watched my dog die No, I would have watched and then I would have processed

37:12And then what I do is I go, what do I do? So there's three little stages there Yeah, I did when she got bit I process it too late Why not Sorry, you just held her leg I held her leg up like this, but he was still but with him attached to it Okay, that helps yeah, you didn't say stop or try to get him I didn't even know what was going on to be honest with you When a dog is biting someone you didn't know what's going on The screaming and all that I have to process all that you got a process so stage four is when I do something the blood when the blood comes I guess it's good you don't have kids It might be well because then it will I mean if a baby falls in a pool you have to you can't process am I by My bye bye bye. I'm off today, right? It's like someone hit him like a cartoon. He speaks like yeah Did you fall in your head? I did yeah, yeah You say you know what you sound like right now You sound like right before you fall asleep You know when someone's talking to you right before you fall asleep and you start mumbling you're like well, we're in a carpool and You know you start saying shit my wife says that all the time She'll be in full conversation. I'll be sleeping on the couch and half in it out and she'll be asking me now big

38:15You gotta be a side bit about that Yeah, that's where I'm at I do that all the time she's like do you know what you were saying last night before you I was like no, I'm no idea because when I start when I nod off on the couch see I'm almost impossible to get to bed Yeah, if if I'm on the couch and comfy with the dog I'm most likely not gonna make it to the bed to fall asleep. I'll probably just fall asleep on the couch And then I wake up to piss and then I'll come up and go to bed No, no, so what time do you use a wake up on the couch to pee like if you realize 530 I wake up to pee now have you smoked weed or drank a little bit or no No, no, sometimes I'm just tired So you just fall asleep and then when you get back to bed, do you wake your wife up or no? She inevitably is waking up because I get I jump in the bed. I can't in ball. Oh, right. That's not good Well, you gotta let her know your home. Yeah, I like to make silence. Oh, you're a little ninja. Yeah ninja in the night I tiptoe right I do slow like blinky. Oh I do the slow blanks slow blank. Yeah, yeah, I go like this Slowly get in there see I can't do it because then the dog the dog wakes it's you can't get in the

39:20Well, the dogs are in her room you're peeing and shitting Yeah, I'm just privately slowly. I never wake her up. It's impossible No, no, no, I'm I've got it on lock the quiet stuff. Yeah, but she must be a good sleeper my wife wakes up She's impossible. She's just like well, if she hears the door you're a big guy I'm trying to lose some weight No, you're a big guy. I'm gonna get on Mugovie. Yeah, just the fucking shadow alone. What are you scary? If I was like in the dark and I see like something walk by so if you're in the dark and then a shadow and the dark comes by your shadow So a dark shadow in a dark room Yep, exactly you think my shadow is so looming that it can it can no because you're not you're not getting I'm not I haven't given you a picture. Give me the picture when I go to bed right I put a mini light on in the in the bathroom I can nightlight exactly Why not and then so I can see shadows walking by Why would you want that exactly? Yeah, yeah, but if I your shadow walk by I would know it would scare me

40:21Yeah big shadow. Yeah, but anyway, don't do it. That's my nickname big shadow That the dog and I fell asleep on the couch last night and she fell asleep on my head Did she lick your face? She if I'm snuggled in the corner she'll sleep in the corner with me But sometimes because I'm fat I'll the cushion will like lean into the couch. You know what I mean? It's like it likes it dips in Yeah, and then so she will slide in and then she'll end up just flopping on my head Maybe golf trips you going daddy That's what she says And I say as many as I want you little bitch. Yeah And that's how daddy takes care of this family. Yeah, I like it. How many golf trips? I got to go. What else do I have? It's the only thing I like Bedrot the way I've been doing. I don't want a bedrod dude. I don't want to be a bed. You're not a you're not a bedrider Oh, she's taught me You become she taught me bedriding I thought you're up in that them now you got a baby so you got to be up you can't lay in bed, okay? Yeah, but when I'm not babysitting I do Somewhere in the house there she's she's like I'll sleep somewhere. Do you eat in bed? No, no you do

41:27No, I don't you nibble. Do I? No, I don't never Pro fuck you Yeah, watch your mouth. Yeah, yeah, no, I don't I'm not nasty. I've just started eating bed like fried chicken Let me throw some stuff out and you see you in bed Go ahead would you eat fried chicken in bed? Yeah, Kentucky fried chicken sure. Oh, no, no not Kentucky fried. Yeah, pop eyes Yeah, pop eyes. Yeah, no, but that's skin will get on with a fried skin no on your bed No, cuz I I made the a makeshift bowl that goes under my I tied her on my neck. It's like a little bib Okay, so it catches all right Pizza yeah, absolutely. Yeah, absolutely and I get it hot with a cheese is drippy Yeah, oh fuck three three stacked pancakes. That's right. You're all the light blueberries can't do pancakes because the stickiness of the So yeah, now you're thinking now you're not kidding see chips No crumbs too crumbly too crumbly too crumbly too crumbly from yeah, yeah, how about this ramen? If you're in bed with me. Yeah, yeah, okay, good. Yeah, I'll bring it over tonight. I love those parties

42:29And then okay, well those are it's actually a really good idea for like a restaurant that you eat in bed That'd be real no that you eat in bed. We serve you in a bed. Yeah What was the name of the place that used to be on third treat the where you ate in like those big comfy? It was it was like a big it was like an Indian restaurant and you ate on the ground But you ate in like these huge comfy. What's read us on it's on third. No, I don't know electrical Otis. Yes electric Is that right there was a used to be an electrical Otis in Los Felos. No, what was the one on third street? Oh, man, dude, I used to love that you like literally laid on a big electronic. What are you doing electric karma electric car? It's always electric. Yeah, so yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Indians love to be they have not got electricity yet That's why exactly okay, that's it. No, so you go to the room go to the big room What's your favorite thing in an Indian restaurant? Butter chicken, but but chicken. But dark chicken man. No, what do I like? I like curries. I like curry Curly yellow. I like red curry Garloch non red curvy yellow curry

43:32Cold Korma. I like veggie Korma love. I love veggie. What's that level spicy? Medium I can't do there's they get too hot for yeah medium. Maybe you like Indian. Yeah, which one already go? I'll merge yes the first time we went to Rome we went to the calcium and you wait these long lines outside and there were Indian guys selling bottles of water Mm-hmm I loved it because the way that it was like a it was like a song to them. They'd go water water water water water for your health Water water water water Water for your health and I had to buy from house like the water guys got me very good. There is water water water water. Yeah But they they go up this long that by the way, they must make bank selling bottles of water they sell for a euro They probably buy it, you know a pack from 12 for a buck the ancient Roman trade with India spices. They love that. Yeah, you know me They they kill it with the spice. They know what they're doing. Yeah, the whole spice trade was through India right if it weren't for them You know whites wouldn't have all the flavor

44:32They had no why didn't you guys do flavor before we were scared of it? Yeah, now you love it. We're still scared of it Yeah, what flavors did you discover during that trade nutmeg cardamom cardamom? Yeah, what else did you get from there? Tarragon Tarragon was a good one Star anise Theranise is a good another one Peperica, let's go basic though pepper and salt was huge That really shook a car like yeah, oh garlic garlic fucked you up. No, but garlic I think that changed the world no, but Italy garlic already They had a lot of garlic. They use garlic on fucking any right they garlic in their cereal But in England and and oh you're not British. I wish an Italian. Yeah, yeah But the Brits yeah, they the British people just got hot sauce about a year and a half ago, I think right They they were banned they banned it no hot sauce in Britain, please When you say hot sauce rise of black pepper huge black old baby. Yeah, cinnamon Hard-of-moment ginger ginger or big ones. I need got I need to get back to cooking man

45:36I can't cook for shit. I keep trying to cook at the house and I ruined it twice. What'd you cook? I was trying to cook this like Mussels pasta muscles that's such a difficult thing to do at home. Yeah, I learned that yeah Yeah, yeah, go basic, but I wanted linguine with muscles sounded really nice with the white wine Bongo I can do a um ball une sauce Bull and eggs I can do yeah already pre made though. Yeah, you open a can That's not absolutely not you homemade you homemade. Yes, you homemade I homemade it will give me the ingredients tomato sauce Tomato sauce no tomatoes tomatoes. Do you puree them? Do you heat them? Do you cook them? Yeah, well, I take extracted extract the tomatoes how how to precision And equipment use a precision maker. Yeah, so I've all the equipment you have a tabletop precisioner. Yeah, yeah, that's pretty impressive And it'll liquidates the tomatoes into a liquidator as well Exactly, so you have all these cut up the garlic you cut up the garlic

46:40You caught up the garlic. I don't care what I say. No, it's just shocking. Yeah, I cut up the garlic Mm-hmm all right into thine thine thine yeah, that's something long Whoa you ever call a business and get sent straight to a voicemail that's clearly from 2015 and just hang up I ever have a have a well you've reached exactly. Yeah, I don't like it either your customers Don't like that either and that's why at some point you just got to say let's fucking quo That's right today's episode is brought to you by quotes spelled Q. U. O the business phone system that is built so you never Miss a call all it takes is one miss call Legend gentlemen by the time you call back the customers already left a competitor a five star review starting Following them on Instagram and shown up to their kids birthday party all of your calls texts and voicemails Living one place so anyone on your team can pick up a conversation see the full history and respond fast I don't care how big or small your business is Quo as you covered they got optional built in AI agents that handle after hours calls answers questions and even books appointments

47:41You're never gonna miss a lead even when your team is offline So I'm telling you if you are running a business of any size no matter what Quo is going to integrate with the tools your team already uses like HubSpot Zapier Claude and more to help you save time stay organized and spend less time chasing information between systems money is on the line Oh, I say hello with Quo try Quo for free plus get 20% of your first six months when you go to Quo.com slash bad friends That's Quo Q. U. O. com slash bad friends talk space Let me say something I wouldn't be alive I don't think without just talk space because therapy has really saved my life and with the traumas of my past That's right talk space is the number one rated online therapy bringing your professional support from licensed therapists and Psychiatrist that you can access anytime and anywhere you have to take control of your mental health I've always said it the word may feel uncertain and out of control at times But one thing you do have control over is taking care of your mental health Talk space makes it easier to start we've been talking about mental health on the show for quite a long time and

48:41Talk space makes that so simple for you particularly because you don't have to go into some weirdly lit office anymore You can do it from the comfort of your own home or wherever it feels nice safe you yeah, wherever it's feel safe Talk space makes getting the help you need easy accessible and affordable plus most insured members have a zero dollar co-pay as a Listener of this podcast you'll get $80 off your first month with talk space when you go to talk space calm and enter promo code space 80 That's space 80 SPAC 80 Zero to match with the license therapist today go to talk space calm and enter that promo code space 80 The perfect lunch combo that first bite of your favorite sub followed by ice cold Pepsi add a couple of friends and now that's next level Suddenly the laughs get louder the stories keep flowing and the food tastes better because Pepsi brings out more flavor more fun and more of the moment Food deserves Pepsi grab a Pepsi Zero sugar today

49:43I feel like you're having a stroke. I think I'm having a stroke. I think something's wrong. Well today's first day without Zannex Do you smell toast right now? No, you're fine. Yeah, I smell cinnamon. Why do people smell toast when they have a stroke? What a weird thing to smell because I really like toast They could have made it something but should have been bad. Yeah, something bad. What does it say up? Phantom smells are linked to temporal lobe seizures every day sinus issues than a typical stroke So even when I make toast, I don't smell toast. That's a good thing. That says it's a pop culture myth Yeah, I'm not even real missing brain cells during a partial seizure, especially in temporal lobe can trigger fall century What's wrong smoke rubber toe? Why? I don't have a stroke Yeah, yeah, speak speak a different language real fast to me I'm gonna do it. He's fine. Yeah, what I'm he's fine. Yeah, but I'm good. Here's the bell fast warning signs balance Sunloss of balance I find face arm speech raise both your arms above your head. Oh Oh

50:43Can we be another one sudden moments of pointing to the sky are in very indicative of stroke speech lured strange hard to understand Oh I'm in trouble. Now. I hope you don't have one that's dangerous. Well, I mean if it happens it happens Well, no, that's not that I we don't want that to switch it up Yeah, we'll get the views Yeah, well, thanks fancy Here's more about the views than your than your actual health. Yeah, the death episode would be big I was mad you didn't come to dinner with me in sports and that bummed us out Yeah, you know, we had a lovely dinner things have changed guy What's changed? Relationship I'm busier. I have more time than I'm giving to somebody else Okay, but we're both married and we both found time to go to dinner together and we invited you because we wanted the little the boys get together Yeah, but when you say downtown in sushi, I get scared and I already know what he's gonna get scallops He didn't get scallops. Yeah, he always gets scallops. Now this place was actually fantastic, but it wasn't just sushi was we got um

51:44Uh What's it called when it's on the let me guess the grill strips, you know, what is that called? Real meats on the car butto car butto And we got yaka manago Yeah, and it's always a bada it's always a bada like you know, yeah, it's a capabara rubber bar. Yeah, I remember beata I already be out of it, but we talked about you were mad that you didn't go Did you know that's why I know it's so it's weird you it's weird to see you in love like this In love man, what does it mean? I love her slow burn this fuck you say I love you I do okay here in love If you say I love you Yeah, I love you too though. Am I in love with you? Yep That's true that's yeah, that's everyone in the air not a good example of what yeah, I mean who in this room are you not in love with? Right yeah, I kind of like her, but sometimes I hate her Well, she got to get back to why don't you put up a checklist of things she has to do during the day You know like a chores she won't do it dude And also you know what a lot of you got it's it's rewards like a dog like if she does something right

52:45You give her a reward Well, she hasn't cleaned my room. It'll very long time. We'll let's offer a reward right now or days I know so how about this can I say this I want to say this what When before you go out tonight because you're going out you better clean it where are you going tonight? Are you going out OC fair the orange county fair you drive the orange county for the fair Yeah, what's at the fair? It's like a carnival right Who you going with? Hillary yeah, and then she she only goes to get recognized What you love getting recognized there? I don't get you take pictures of the OC fair with people and they come up to you. No Yeah, you do does anybody is no one's ever asked you for a photo Oh, I want to go to the alien abduction the air raid. Yeah, the big wheel. Do you get it you go on these rides? No, I hate rides. Yeah, well then what else is at the fair game livestock. Oh, there's animals. Yeah animals food food

53:45Food food. I never you've have you been to the OC fair? I never I don't like fairs I never been. Yeah, you like unfairs. Yeah. Oh, there's a grand champion cow right there. Oh, yeah, 2017 We're still talking about that guy. Yeah market well after we ate and we talked about him. No, he's delicious. Yeah It was very delicious when you when they win it then you can bid for it and we bid it for the 2017 Right huge and we got to what? I think $300 maybe just about yeah, yeah, 25 give or take yeah, yeah, we bought it We had a hell of a time eating him so many tea bones so many tea bonds wait too many side hip wait some side hip Yeah, you want to talk about a weird gig I had let yesterday. I was talking to Carlos on the phone good god What was it? I did a private gig yesterday like a quarter. Why do you do that corporate? Yeah, well you don't do corporate gig No, I've never done it why not? Because it hit there's too many rules Well, this was no rules. I could do whatever I wanted there was nothing. It was just it was an interesting day Tell me I did it the Reagan library how many people

54:46Nine Not many people were there nine no, yeah, you just stand up in front of nine people I brought Joey Serone from the commissary. No Joey. Yeah, he's hilarious the big guy. Yeah, he's like six eights Yeah, yeah, I brought Joey I was like you got to come with me and do this gig and open it up because I can't cold up into a room at the Reagan library to nine guys Yeah, how much time do you do you? He did 15 and then you went up and it seemed like a you know You know eternity. Well, yeah, you know the beginning of Star Wars. That's what felt like oh my god It's never gonna end yeah, yeah, he did 15 and I had to do like 30 or 40 Tough tough tough. Oh, I can't I've done I mean I've done corporate Guys yeah, yeah, that's yeah so hard no so hard. That's a no for me. We had a great time Who went me and Joey Serone you did these guys go no hell no He literally sent me the map of the Reagan library and he's like you're gonna be parking next to an f14 We parked my car under a fucking fighter jet. Wow We walked inside and Joey was like I think I'm scared Yeah, and I was like this is yeah, and then they brought us into a ballroom for which is the green room

55:46It's massive. Yeah, it's just a table with popcorn and a mountain valley water. Oh my god And she said do you need anything else? I was like no just maybe Maybe didn't over the exits are I was so freaked out man doing these private gigs are so hard to do because you want you to go in being like I'm gonna have fun I'm gonna make them laugh, but they're so hard. It's nine guys in a room. Yeah And by the way guess what time it was at oh my god, let me guess 2 p.m. 145. Oh That's even a moron ever nightmare 145. Oh wow, and I was like And I asked to say why in the middle of the day because they what they went to the Dodger game Yeah, they need to take a look. They need to get to the Dodger. Yeah, nobody was it I'm not saying anything bad about him very nice guys. It's just yeah You know, I'm saying you can't do well in those scenarios. It's so hard It's so hard to you stand up in the dead middle of the day in a room with nine people and they're not prepped by the way The woman putting it together goes this is even funny. You're gonna laugh the woman put are you in a blue tube right now Yes checking if it's gold. Yeah, you're fine The woman who put it together the sweet woman that was there Karen who I love She goes and the best part is they don't know they're getting a comedy show today

56:50I was like that's not the best part. That's not the best part. No, I go. They don't know. They didn't know I didn't know until me that no no I didn't know until we were already there and then joker so they're not fans No, no, but they didn't go Andrew Santino and they stood up. Oh my god. That's that's true Ask Joey Serone I call him right now if you want me to call Joey ask him Wow, Angel I literally sat on stage Joey can vouch. I said hey, how many guys know who I am not one hand was raised Oh, it can be it can be it can be it was incredible. I loved it wild well I had the laugh through it like what are you gonna do it was in sync? What's it a birthday present? No, it was like a core It was like a boys trip corporate gig for this guy don't have his number You want me to call him? No, okay. Yeah It was insane But I we still had fun. That's why you bring someone that you like on the road. Yeah I went on the road. I bought Jeremy Watkins ones to a corporate thing. Jeremiah Watkins. Yeah, and or his twin brother Jeremy Whatever his name is and then I know I'm off today. Here's Serine. We're calling you Serine Branson from now

57:54Serine yeah, yeah, I'm sorry. Terris Taisen Ted to the pits go to the pet pits so um It's a very heavy burlite. Jerry Jerry Jerry Watkins. I brought on the road you big big dog Jay Wat. Yeah Jay Wat and Hebom so hard Hebom so he'll even if I call him he'll even pick up yeah and talk about it Hebom so hard all you can hear in the distance is my hyena loud Hahaha That's all you can hear. Wait, were we a corporate gig in Vegas. Yeah, it was nightmare and he was doing physical things Yeah, you got to try yeah, yeah, yeah, it didn't work What are you smoking on what is that it's like a babe sorry? I apologize um you're back to smoking cigarettes too I tell you I've been through a lot of anxiety in the last couple weeks I know, but I thought you were quitting the cigarettes for good. I know, but I was in such high anxiety That I'm like there's no other way to do it, but I got it you got to get through whatever you need to do I had to go through it. It was tough. That's fine. Yeah, well you're here on the other side

58:56And you went to mental yeah go ahead no drugs. I heard you're doing drugs again. I'm not doing drugs. Yeah, right. Yeah Weed once last time you had weed Last year or January wow are you going when you go out tonight to the fair? Are you drinking at the fair? I don't like to drink do your friends drink no micro dose No, the new generation doesn't drink booze. Yeah, they kids don't do that. Yeah, they microdore they take a gummy Right you take a gummy? No, wow I'm so how are you guys hiding your pain. Yeah, what are you doing to mask all the problems? Yeah I don't know You got to discover it So in your group of friends nobody no one drinks booze, huh? There's some but it's not like they need it for every time we hang out Wow, so you don't really drug addict friends you got to get one yeah, they're fun. We're exciting Yeah, then you can start a podcast with one one day. Yo, dude. Yeah, yeah, stop. What? Yeah, yeah, it's my favorite thing in the world stop what I'm a child of addiction All right, we relate yet. Yeah, 830 billion dollars in global market value over four year period leading to 2026 bloomberg tracking

1:00:03The global alcohol industry has lost that much. They've lost 830 billion dollars. It's don't drink alcohol dude It's gone and because of all these health influencers online out being like what are you getting out of drinking anyway? And people are like all right, so I'm not gonna do people eating sardines and stuff all day long sardines and beans There's a shop on Melrose. Yeah, like me shop on Melrose co sardines and beans No, it's pretty impressive, dude. It's it's actually But then they say stuff like like look is a really a shop like call that she's sardines and beans on Melrose is that a real place? And of course not oh I was gonna go now. No, I know Yeah, yeah, it's built for you But I think like with our generation like you know, I like to have a couple of soda pops and I like it but I do think Yeah, it's not great for you and people know it but but then the argument is Are you taking away from some social aspects of the world? But also less sex so less sex less alcohol Well less alcohol good less sex bad Because alcohol with sex we're having less sex they are Oh, yeah more phone more screen so less more screens less sex

1:01:06I don't hear a lot of like going to clubs Or clubs are much better. What are you guys doing to like feel free? Yeah So music is dead art is dead sex is dead. Music is dead drugs are gone. Yeah, and alcohol is not existent What the fuck are you guys doing doing use on your phone in bed all day? Yeah, yeah, we'll see we're fucked you are too, huh? You are too my my fun in bed. Yes. I'm not in bed You are you're you love to fucking go through it my phone. Yeah Take stock you love tick talking on the toilet. I tick talk. Yeah, you talk talk other places What am I talking you're talking everywhere am I taking what I'm talking? Yeah, you're taking everywhere I love tick talk on the toilet. I'll admit it's my favorite thing in the world. We do it in bed as well No can't do it in bed. Do you lie? We made a pact. We can't be on tick talking bed. Oh you and your wife well We said no phones in bed. Mm-hmm. That's why you're in the coach couch sleeping That's why you're in the couch sleeping. That's why I'm in the coach. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, put me in coach. Yeah, I'm on the couch. Yeah, sleeping I sleep on the couch because you're because I'm lazy and I don't want to go up I don't want to go up to the I've seen you scroll so much you're the master. What do you mean you see me scroll scroll? A lot

1:02:11I seen your car scroll When I'm driving yeah, nobody's better driving and scrolling than me, but you do it. No, I do it You do Do I scroll so much on the on the road? I put on tunes and I focus on the road. That's great God bless America I can't get off the talk when I'm when I'm on the toilet. I got a hemorrhoid from it I got a hemorrhoid from being on the toilet too long. Do you still have it? Yeah, you want to see it? He's still there. I've seen him. He's still there. I told him he's got to go soon I told him I say you're overstaying you're welcome, Mr. Hemorrhoid You got to get out of here, but I asked the doctor and he said it's totally normal. You're spending too much time in the toilet See, I don't push out. I think that's the white people's problem. I didn't push he no no no you can get him because I don't know any agents Hemorrhoids yeah, but I know a couple of whites that have it Yeah, yeah, I think you guys push out too much. I didn't push this from sitting too long He said you can get him from just sitting on the toilet too long. Yeah, five-minute rule We just pops out because you're sitting too long Because of the blood and the gravity from the sacks and your to see I'm sitting on the toilet can worsen your hemorrhoids

1:03:16Main risk include prolonged risk sitting at a toilet desk hard services. How many hours are you? Yeah, how many are you in there 12 maybe max 11 to 12 That's a remarkable no, I'll sit on the toilet. Sometimes I will catch myself beyond the for half an hour Yeah, no five minutes. Wow. It's my escape time. Yeah, and the dog comes the door and she sits and she watches me and I'll chat with her And I'll go look at this and I'll show her TikTok and yeah, and she'll go And then I'll go back to it. Yeah, I love when the animals watch a poop. It's my favorite thing in the world because they do it Guy watch her poop. She watches me. It's a balance. I really like I make her pick mine up though. Yeah Go get up here and clean this up. She just opens the door Yeah, you let him in. Yeah, no, you let him out. You don't look after them. Oh, see who's pooping and who's not see I have a little thing You don't do it. What are you doing? I do. I have a little note. I go Taking notes Yeah, because I care what's your rule now? Are you finally cleaning up your poop after being called out for years of not cleaning up poop in the neighborhood? No, she doesn't

1:04:18So you don't take the dogs for a walk ever. They're my backyard. No, I'm that that's happened as it happened in 10 years Because that's the that's the problem with the hills. You can't take a dog for the walk in the hills. You can't No, when you have a backyard, you just let them out It's not a walk you have to take a dog for a fucking walk and throw balls at them. You got to take them for a walk Sometimes you hike you don't have to trails I've never seen that happen one time Not one time I have a you you have nothing new to report. I'm so shocked. I haven't seen you in so long. You have nothing new to report I have to buy new mugs because he to Bobby that's not true. I bait let go let it go. Let go. No, let go of like on Don't you go down to the a speak. Yeah, I am I'm gonna go let go of like on one day at a time You told me that don't like you got to wash the mugs really well because I pee at I pee in the night You have a bathroom in your room. He doesn't eat in bed, but he pees in bed. Yeah Wait, you have a bathroom. I'll just replace all the mugs and he said no just keep them

1:05:19Why why why why would you pee in a mug just go to the bathroom. It's right there Sometimes the distance from to more and sitting to the bathrooms too long I'm adjume when you go to sell this house Sometimes and they're like it's a pool room downstairs. There's a piss room upstairs And the piss mugs come with the home just so you know There is no pool. It's got coffee in it Hmm I mean, who's gonna buy that? You said too much on the show about your home They'll be cleaning, huh deep cleaning you're gonna have to set it on fire. Okay, you have to burn the fucking thing to the ground No, he did that in Coachella and I saw him and he tried to say no, I never peed on anything. Oh, yeah Why he denied it? Why are you peeing in mugs? I need to know These are the same monks people drink out of it It's a territory. It's a territory thing You're marking your territory in your home. It's your house. It's a territory thing. You own the territory. It doesn't matter

1:06:19People have to know he's burning the boats. What I'm in shock because I remember Jewels talking about that and I have no shame. It's not about shame. It's it's hygiene. It's insane And I will stay Where I'm at with my being you know what maybe let her not move in I think her not That's a good idea. How do you feel about it? I just hate it because I feel like every time I just use a mug I can like I feel like I can smell but you can't that's the thing But I because I did do it clean You do a deep clip oh my god. He'll do a deep clip on him. You can't you won't be able to snark him if he's deeply Dude, I can't speak today. It's so weird so weird I do a deep loop I need help I think Like the last middle yes, yeah, call it to go in though. No, I got it Honestly, I'm concerned Yeah, I'm full of anxiety this is day one with you know, I know you're back. It's fine

1:07:21It's like you know when did your mom come back Can she do some kind of like ritual spell on him to get him back to where he needs to be? Shake some stuff at him He always feels better when mom was around She does have your mother has such an incredible energy your mom is still like such a I love your mom I love laughter or an I love joy and I feel it with throughout the house Transcending through the walls when she's there in general They past memories, you know, I mean the past laughs these walls to talk yeah, they can talk right so I can hear the creeks And it tells me a story the creeks and cracks. Yeah, crevices and crew. Yeah, and the story involves a lot of trials and tribulations And how many trials three how many trips one Yeah, I've only been through one tribulation, but a lot of trials three. Yeah, and all in that house So um everything tells a story and everything has to tell a story Yeah That's cutting board You think about that cutting board a lot the cutting board tells a story. What does it say? Ginger

1:08:24You know Garlic Not exactly. Yeah, you know, hey, sorry talking about me. I was like, uh basil It all tells a story But anyway, it's really good to be here and I'm glad we were able to recap on a many issues. We got to get you to the hospital Yeah, I think we need to take you to the hospital. No, I feel great. Take every glasses Hey, look fine You want to see my new license? Do I Okay, this is my best photo yet This is my best best work. You just go retake your license photo. Yeah, can you just send it in now? You don't have to go in and take the photo because I want to do the best face. Could you like being recognized at the DMV? Why don't you have in there four? What do you have? Look at my new oh, it looks nice actually. It's a nice license. Oh, that's funny doing like a cross side. You look like me. Yeah By the way, but by the way, I got to show you I should have sent the picture the Chicago Cubs sent me a a jersey Because I never went to Philly to the all-star game because you know, I remember the flights got canceled And they sent me my jersey and it says Bobby mom on the back. That's amazing. It's incredible. I have my license back. No

1:09:28Class none No, see class C. Thank you sex None Hopefully a lot recently Eyesbrown hairs black eyes low I Eyes low five four one sixty exactly you're five three Why do you like me my fucking license back? Why would you give me my license back? You lied again. You're holding it like a ice agent. I'm holding it Look at that look at that holes. Where are you coming from? No, it okay getting the van Yeah Wrong answer get my license back on it's right there. Fuck you. Serene Dion I've never seen you so like serene Dion Am I the agent saline? Yeah, yeah ladies and gentlemen serene Dion. I don't know any songs from her, but I'll try Will always find you

1:10:30you don't know any saline Dion songs the titanic yeah, I don't forgot how it goes My heart will go on Do give me the tune in and I'll sing it after Wherever Er Silly or Indian. Yeah, she sings her name in it. Yeah, yeah. I don't know why she does that. Maybe to make people know it's her song. Yeah. I didn't sleep good last night. I had to find me two or three hours of sleep and that's what's coming. I slept so good. I know. We do have polar opposites at night sometimes. Isn't that funny though? Sometimes when I sleep bad, you slept for 40 hours. Sometimes I get night scurries and then you don't. You know what I do in the middle of the night? Now I have, I put my hands behind my back like an old Asian guy and I shuffle to the bathroom. Yeah. I like the way it feels. I climb the side of my house. You climb the side of it? Yeah, yeah. I have little rock dentures in there. You climb the roof? Yeah, yeah. You just sit up there and think?

1:11:31Yeah, like white people. Yeah, the ladder. Yeah, just get up on the roof. I park over here. You park over on your house. Yeah. That's white people. That's where the best at that. You're the best at any of those extreme things and I have to admit that right now. I love. Like the wingsuit guys. You guys are great at that. It's probably one of our best things. Yeah. Hatter balloons. Yeah. I'm not a movie night. Just you and I. Why don't you do that? Well, he's busy with his girlfriend. No, she doesn't like hate spending time with me. I do. But I showed my girlfriend a movie that she had never seen before and then you know, holds up, I think. Braveheart. Braveheart. Yeah, I've never seen it. I'll tell you what it's about. Willie Wallace. Willie Wallace. His name, the actor's Willie Wallace. Yeah, Willie Wallace. Who's he? He's playing Mel Gibson. Yeah. Willie Wallace. Oh, is that the Jutez guy? Yeah. I love him. Yeah, he don't you love it when he does that? Love him. Yeah. And such a good movie. It really is a good movie. It's so good. Yeah. Although I go. Scotland. For Scotland. Yeah.

1:12:31For Scotland. For freedom. For freedom. I wonder if Scottish people like that. Do they like that movie? Well, they're not. He's the number one guy. Historical figure. He's Australian though, right? The actor is, yeah. Isn't that weird? It's crazy. Do you ever think about that? That he's, he doesn't seem like he's Australian. It's nut. He's got nothing new to report. What about your behavior with eggs? Your egg behavior. Your egg. God. We're talking to a child. Your behavior with eggs. Yeah, yeah. Eggs. Your egg behavior. What's egg behavior? You know. I'll tell you why. I have to get new eggs because of the expiration date. All right. So it's like you. I'll still eat it. Yeah, but you don't eat eggs past the expiration date. Do you? They eat eggs with birds in them. I know. These people eat bird eggs with a, with a just recently dead bird. They're going to eat expired. Not so. In my house, right? We abide by expiration dates.

1:13:32But they're still good. That doesn't matter. If this is August. I have diarrhea. What? I eat the expired eggs. Yeah. In fact, when you get home tonight, you're making me four baked potato. I'm not picking it. You're going to boil eggs. You're going to make potato. You've got to go to the hospital, man. That's so far away from boiled eggs. Baked potato. It's time for the meat. It just starts with the meat. Unbelievable. If stored below four degrees, egg, you can have eggs for so long. The expiration dates bullshit. I read the expiration date. I don't go fuck what you guys say. I'm not going to get some of them. How long? What does it say? Three to five weeks past that date. They're still good. The month past the expiration date. So that's what you do? Yes, dude. Okay. Yes, it's bullshit. I want four eggs at home. Boyled free. Okay. When there's mold on the bread, I just cut the mold off and still eat. That's insane. No. If a banana is bruised at all, I can't eat it. Yeah, you're... What? Yeah, yeah.

1:14:33It's been beat up. I can't do it. Let's see. Well, my stomach. Call my stomach a pussy. Pussy. Yeah. Yeah. Pussy. Pussy. Yeah. I'm not going to get a bad for banana bread. Yeah, I don't make that. Do you like banana bread? Dude, you know what? I think I like banana bread more than most people on earth. I'll have to say that. Most people. Yeah. Dude, every time I'm in Hawaii or in Maui or whatever, right? And I walk and I do the road to Hana and there's that one lady that's a little too inconveniently to my right to pull over, but I pull over anyway. To get her banana bread. Exactly. My wife makes banana bread. I'm going to bring you someone's fucking fun out. It can't be good. I'm putting it in for everyone. Oh, it can't be good. I just said that guy. Why? Because she's white. They don't know how to make it. Banana bread was definitely our thing. No, it's not. Banana bread is definitely an island or thing. No, it's fucking hot. It's too intricate and full of flavor and moistness and buttery. Who started banana bread? It's got to be the fucking whites.

1:15:34It can't be. It better be. I'll tell you that. I'm changing Wikipedia if it's not. Banana bread was what? Not invented by a single person. Emerge in North America in the late 19th and early of 20th centuries is a resourceful kitchen creation, North America. Not the island. You invented it. Early mention of banana bread. Congratulations. Early mention of banana bread appeared in Lawrence, Kansas, newspaper, Kansas. He couldn't be a whiter. There is no black people in Kansas. I just trust it more when it comes to Ireland because there are more associated with the banana. No, they're not. They're associated with selling the banana to the white. That's a banana, right? Is an island treat. Banana. Banana is. It's a white person. Yeah, and pineapple. Here's the thing. Because this is where the bananas come from in the islands, they get rid of the ones that bruise like you do. But the whites took it on and we said, we'll take the bruises and we'll make something out of it. When life gives you bruised bananas, you make... Stick with strawberry. Shortcakes. Don't tell me how to paste. Yeah, yeah. Stick with strawberry, shortcakes, and we'll take the banana.

1:16:34Dare tell me how to paste your pal. Okay. Because pastry is not in your world. Asian pastry. No, thank you. Asian pastry. Three is the best in the market. No, it's not. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Yeah. That's your thing. No. French and the whites to pastry is the best. Not now though. We took over the game. No, you fucking did it. Don't a career town, dude. We took over the game, dude. No, I don't want a kimchi fucking donut. Do you have any kimchi scone? Sounds good. Yeah, in Hawaii, right, at... What's it called? You got to come up with it. Mo Calalo. If you go to Mo Calalo, is that a kimchi scone? Yeah. Yeah. Kimchi scones are so good. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Leave it to the French. No. Leave it to the French. Because what Asians do is like, we'll go to John in it. I don't want to go to John in a fucking muffin. That's insane. Okay. Leave it to the French. That's why you're having grown. You're taste needs. You piss and mugs in your house. I haven't grown. You pee inside of coffee mugs in your home.

1:17:36Yeah. And you need to open up your fucking table here and open it up. I'm closing the table pal. No one is invited to the table now. It's over. What does it say? When an adult urinates and mugs bottles are unconventional containers of points to a breakdown in typical behavior psychological and neurological functioning. They may be in trouble. They may be in a podcast stumbling their words. Dileerium. It's even worse. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I love Dileerium. You are Dileerium. Yeah, yeah. I've been in Dileerium states before. I've been Dileerium. All right, we'll close it out, Choules. Look at the camera. Thank you for being a bad friend. Woo. Woo. Woo. Woo. Woo. Woo. Woo. Woo. Woo. Woo. Woo. Woo. Woo. Woo. Woo. Woo. Woo. Woo. Woo. Woo. Woo. Woo. Hey, it's Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile. Now, I was looking for fun ways to tell you that Mint's offer

1:18:39of unlimited premium wireless for $15 a month is back. So I thought it would be fun if we made $15 bills, but it turns out that's very illegal. So there goes my big idea for the commercial. Give it a try at MintMobile.com slash switch. Up from payment of $45 for three months, $90 for six months or $180 for 12 month plan required, $15 per month equivalent to taxes and fees extra. Initial plan term only greater than 50 gigabytes me slow when network is busy. See terms.