[No Laughter Version] Videos of groovy drum beats made by George W. Bush’s presidential opponent have been appearing in my social media feeds. (+ 17 more dad jokes!)

I have created the most advanced AI soldier.

The weight is over.

Tronaries now streaming on Disney+.

We are looking for something.

Something you've discovered.

And some of us will stop at nothing to get it.

Ready?

The countdown is complete.

There's no going back.

Dr. Rektiv is clear.

Hang on!

Tronaries now streaming on Disney+.

Ready to be J13.

In fact, it's Dublin.

What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo?

One is heavy, and the other is a little lighter.

Today, a Bradford man with a stutter was convicted and sent to prison for life.

But how victims are worried that he won't finish his sentence?

What's an astronaut's favorite part of a computer?

The spacebar.

What did one Shriners say to another Shriners at the convention?

I'm sorry, I don't know your name, but your faeze looks familiar.

What do Irishmen call a fake diamond?

A shamrock.

Why did the Irishmen go outside on St. Patrick's Day?

To sit on his patio.

My bands called the infield.

All of our hits are singles.

I wasn't just sad when I saw the brand name toothpaste fall off the bathroom counter.

I was Chris Fallen.

What do you say to someone who refuses to let you help stitch them up?

Suit yourself.

Laughter continues shortly after this brief ad break.

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Videos of Groovy Drumbeats made by George W. Bush's presidential opponent have been appearing in my social media feeds.

It must be the Al Gore rhythms.

I have a scrapbook of all the places I've enjoyed pints of Irish beer.

To save some shelf space, I consolidated it with my International Music Vinyl Collection.

I call it my Guinness Book of World Records.

What do you call a psychologist chicken? Freud Chicken.

I met a group of very successful female anglers and I asked what their secret was.

They told me a net.

I'm Montgomery Jones, hold on until the end of the episode for a bonus joke.

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The daily dad jokes podcast is produced by classic studios.

See the show notes page for social media links and joke credits.

This show was recorded in front of a canned studio audience.

Shout out to the people.

Wondering what the opposite of it is.