[No Laughter Version] What award did the theoretical physicist receive for putting Pavlov’s dog into Schrödinger’s box? (+ 16 more dad jokes!)

0:00Did you hear about the restaurant called Karma? There's no menu. You get what you deserve. They did a DNA test on a frog. Seems he's part English, part Irish, and a tadpole. What do you do when you see a spaceman? Park your car and it man. I went to school with a girl named nonstick cooking spray. He tried calling her Pam, but it didn't stick. Why don't tattletails have lifelong friends? A snitch and time drops dimes. Why are Star Wars movies so long? Because they are spaced out. Did you ever hear about the guy that only sings when the car is in reverse? Turns out he's a backup singer. Did you know killer whales are really good at making music together? They're called an orcastra.

1:00An optimist sees a glass half full. A pessimist sees a glass half empty. An engineer sees a glass that is. Twice as large as it needs to be. What do you call a nice guy that's into rocks? A nice guy. I heard you're dating a girl that only eats plants. Who is she? Oh, you've probably never heard of her before. Poor dad jokes are on the way after this quick announcement. This Easter skipped the ordinary and whip up something golden with melty creamy velvita cheese. From scalloped potatoes to rich mac and cheese, velvita turns every bite into a crowd pleasing celebration, bringing the extra to the ordinary, transforming simple sides into lips-macking, satisfying moments. So go on, make it melt, make it craveable, make it indulgent, velvita, respect the drip. Visit velvita.com slash Easter for some recipe inspiration.

2:02April showers bring me flowers, but what do me flowers bring, comma, pilgrims? My grand was 80% Irish. Her name was Irish. Remember the cool aid man from the 90s? He played baseball. He was the pitcher. My friend Phillip had his lip removed last week. Now we just call him Phil. What do you call getting coerced into doing something by a Frenchman? Pierre Pressure. I'm Montgomery Jones. Stick around until the end of the episode for a bonus joke. We're on a mission to spread the laughs and groans far and wide. Do us a favor and share a joke with your loved ones today. Looking for the gift for dad? We have the official daily dad jokes podcast electronic joke button now available on Amazon. A massive 500 preloaded dad jokes guaranteed to make you laugh and groan. Check the show notes page for the link.

3:05The daily dad jokes podcast is produced by classic studios. See the show notes page for social media links and joke credits. This show was recorded in front of a canned studio audience. Are you stuck staring at your W2? Our tax refund worry is holding you back. You probably have FOMO. The fear of messing up. The fix? Using turbo tax on into a credit karma. They find every credit and deduction to help you get every refund dollar you deserve. Or your money back. It's time to overcome your fear of messing up and get your taxes done right. Start filing today in the credit karma app. What award did the theoretical physicist receive for putting Pavlov's dog into Schrodinger's box? A Nobel Prize.

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