[No Laughter Version] World Theatre Day! 36 dad jokes that are a play on words! 27 March 2026

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My wife wanted to watch a movie about the life of William Shakespeare.

I asked her to be or not to be.

Why did the High School Theatre Club fail?

Because the first rule of the club was no drama.

Why did Zeus strike the Greek Theatre?

To electrify the audience.

Did you hear that Shakespeare was a lousy wrestler?

He was no as the no holds barred.

What do you call a weapon with stage fright?

Shakespeare.

Why are jokes and theaters not funny?

They seem pretty staged.

Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floor?

It was just a stage he was going through.

Who is the greatest chicken killer in all of Shakespeare?

McBeth, of course, for he did murder most foul.

Just saw Pinocchio perform at the theatre.

His performance was kind of wooden.

Did you hear about the fight in the theatre?

If you asked me, it was staged.

A theatre company let some people go.

They hired too many to play clouds.

They overcast.

What kind of pasta can interfere with Broadway theatre awards?

Rigatoni.

I just saw Les Miserables in the theatre.

Personally, I think the whole rebellion thing was staged.

In Shakespearean times, English class was really easy.

Mostly, because you didn't have to read Shakespeare.

I debuted my comedy act at a haunted theatre.

I got booed off stage.

What do you call a group of workers on stage?

In Orcastra.

When Shakespeare tries to pick between which Spider-Man movies to watch,

the question isn't whether the movie is good or bad.

Toby, or not Toby, that is the question.

Just a moment away from more dead jokes.

Right after this brief pause.

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The Snake.

Dream team.

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Why did the fruit theatre company not pick the melon to star in Romeo and Juliet?

Because it cantaloupe.

Did you know that Shakespeare wasn't just an amazing playwright?

He also made exceptional wigs.

His shop name?

To pay or not to pay?

I saw a theatre production about puns recently.

It was a play on words.

I went to see the famous iron swordsmen of Venice perform their street theatre.

But when I got there, the streets were empty with only a small sign saying that there would be no show today because it was the fairest duelers day off.

While she was singing her solo, the actress fell down from the stage during the Broadway musical.

Now she has a supporting cast.

Did you know Shakespeare wrote a prequel to Hamlet?

It was called Piglet.

My local theatre had a Polish sound engineer.

And they had to check 1-2, 1-2.

I love using our theatre's trapdoor.

It's just a stage I'm going through.

Why do we say break a leg in the theatre?

It's because everyone in the play is in a cast.

Have you guys been following that Broadway controversy?

Turns out all their plays are staged.

An aspiring thief enters the theatre and steals the spotlight.

My son took up magic and he's really into disappearing tricks lately.

I know it's just a stage he's going through.

My friend just lost his job as a stage designer.

He took it pretty well.

He left without creating a scene.

What pantomime is staged in a chemist?

Puss and boots.

William Shakespeare walks into a bar.

The barman says, sorry mate, you're barred.

Before becoming famous as an escape artist,

Harry Houdini focused more on disappearing eggs.

He performed this using a complex set of trap doors.

But it was just a stage he was going through.

I have a pencil that used to belong to William Shakespeare.

He chewed it a lot.

Now, I can't tell if it's to be or not to be.

I took my daughter to a sock puppet theatre.

It was a show of hands.

I have a degree in musical theatre.

I may not be able to solve a complex math problem,

but I can solve a problem like Maria.

I'm Montgomery Jones.

We're on a mission to spread the laughs and groans far and wide.

So please do us a favor and share just one of these jokes with your family and friends today.

Thanks.

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See the show notes page for social media links and joke credits.

This show was recorded in front of a canned studio audience.

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