Talking Dateline: Conversations at CrimeCon Part 2

0:00Hi, I'm Kate Snow, NBC News anchor and host of the NBC News podcast The Drink. This month I'm sitting down with actor, writer, producer Brendan Hunt. Most of you know him as Coach Beard from Ted Lasso, but there is so much more to his story. We sit down, we talk about all of it from his bumpy upbringing to his years in improv comedy and how a Hollywood rejection opened the door to co-creating Ted Lasso. It's an open, funny conversation about perseverance, creativity, and the winding road that brought him right here. We hope you'll join us for The Drink. Listen and follow wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, everybody. Lester Hold here. We've got a special talking date line for you this week. It's part two of a conversation Josh Mankewitz had at this year's Crime Con with Ellison Barber, his NBC News colleague and host of the Netflix video podcast allegedly.

1:00The conversation was taped in front of a live audience at Caesar's Palace in Las Vegas. And the audience had some questions of their own for Josh, which we'll play later. But first Ellison, who is a lifelong date line fan herself, asked Josh what it's like talking to families who have suffered the unimaginable. Hi guys, I'm so happy to be here at Crime Con. I'm so honored to be here with you. How has your Crime Con been? It's been wonderful. I've seen a lot of familiar faces. I gather this is, if it's not the biggest crime con on it, certainly pretty close. It's a lot of people. I cannot find my way around Caesar's. I'm sorry. Yeah. No one else can either. But I bring you greetings from everybody at date line, particularly what's his name? Let's talk date line.

2:00One of your old episodes I recently watched, I think it's called Haunted. And it's there investigating a pair of double murders that took place in Nebraska years apart. And police are starting to realize they think that they're dealing with a serial killer. And one of the things in that that I thought a lot about after was there's a moment, one of the victims was an 11 year old. I think his name was Tom Hunter. And there was a moment when you're doing interviews with some of the families and you say something about how grief presents itself in different ways. And for me, I think about that a lot when I'm covering stories because it's hard to know how anybody will react in a traumatic situation. But I also think of recent cases where there have been instances where people have felt like the family has come under a microscope unfairly. There was a case recently involving a dentist where he and his wife were murdered. And there was a situation where the brother-in-law and I've spoken to him where he talked about people speculating when he was doing media interviews of thinking that he was behaving in a way.

3:01And he had nothing to do with this and how painful it was for him and his family. And I was curious when you think about that concept of sort of grief presenting itself in different ways. What have you learned in that regard and how does it impact the way you cover stories? One of the things I never say in Dateline and that I try not to use if we get interviews on this is the idea that settling one of these cases, figuring out who it was, maybe locking somebody up represents something called closure. Because that doesn't exist. And it's a nice idea, but it is not reality. And I hate it when people talk about well now the family can have some closure. That's not going to happen. Your life is split in half the part before and the part after. And I think that sort of the ripple effect of murder is something that isn't as well understood.

4:09Some I certainly don't understand until I started covering this, which was about 20 years ago at Dateline. And the extent to which things that happen, these losses that families suffer end up affecting people who maybe didn't even know the person who was killed. And the kids who grow up and then have families of their own, and then they have a kid in junior high who says can I go to the sleep away? And the answer is absolutely not, you cannot. And they say, well, everybody else is going, yeah, well, you're not. And they can't even really, parents sometimes can't really explain why that is. And it's because it mirrors too directly the situation that their own family member went through. So I think that the idea of the distance and time sort of mitigates what people feel.

5:12Again, it's like closure. It's a nice idea. It's not always real life. And some of these stories that you've done and the families that you have gotten to meet. Nicole Schmidt is here, Gabby Petito's mom. You and I both been able to meet her and she's such an amazing person. And for me, when I think about that story and all the news coverage that came around it, I find hope because I think that it is the lesson that comes from it, is that there is a chance that everybody can do something that can have a big impact. How has that been for you? Seeing families go through the unimaginable, being put in positions they never asked for, having their lives irreparably changed, and then choosing to use it to do something. Sometimes, what we see on day line, shatters people. And it's ended marriages. And it has reduced people to a puddle. And sometimes it transforms people. I did a story right at the beginning of our focus on True Crime in San Diego,

6:18about a woman named Tori Venot. She and her almost infant son. He was killed and she was killed by the baby's father, who did not want to pay child support, but I think mostly did not want to embarrass his family. I thought that was sort of the motivation. He's locked up now. Tori's mom sort of fell apart after that, losing her daughter and her grandson. And then picked herself up and a couple of years later was like victim advocate of the year in California. And now when I encounter families who are having a difficult time, which is not uncommon. I send them to Tori's mom, Dana Arras, and she's been able to help people. Tracy Matheson, whose daughter Molly was murdered. There's a thing called Project Beloved, which I urge you to all take a look at. It's a similar kind of thing, which was spawned by the loss of someone.

7:22It's like the smart family in California, who even though a man was convicted of killing Kristen, their daughter, like they haven't stopped for a second. Like they want her body. Like they know. They know she's dead. They want her remains. And they're still putting pressure on law enforcement to find it. And I think they will at some point, because they're relentless. So I mean, you see both sides of this. You mentioned Kristen Smart. There's been a lot of activity in terms of searches related to Kristen Smart of late. What do you make of that? Look, I mean, I think a lot of it is due to a couple of things. The smart family, as I just said, won't give up. They have remained very focused on getting a result in that. Even after their daughter's murderer was convicted. I think it's also a tribute to the sheriff there,

8:27who when he was elected, which was some years ago, made a pledge during the campaign that he, like, this was like the big unsolved case in that jurisdiction. And he wanted to make it a priority. And he said that he would. And then he did. So that's part of it. The other part of it, which was this great sort of ex-factor, was that, as a lot of you probably know, a podcast played a huge role in that case. And in some ways, that's sort of what I want to give law enforcement in the sheriff's office sort of the most credit for, because frequently, when someone unorthodox walks through the door, whether it's a private citizen or a private eye or a podcaster or a journalist, and says, you know, I have information on your case. I think I know some things that you might want to know. Frequently, the lawyers were not terribly interested in talking to those people. Or they say, like, great, you know, fill out this form, which I might never read. But in this case, the podcaster, a guy named Chris Lambert,

9:32who has a podcast called Your Own Backyard, that was really sort of instrumental in getting that case over the finish line. And so a huge amount of credit is due, not just to him for the sort of way he presented it, but also to the smart family and law enforcement, which, like, listened and was willing to take information from what was at the time a non-traditional source. And I think you'll probably see more of that as the years pass. When we come back, Ellison and Josh discuss a theme running through several of his recent episodes, Stocking, and what more the legal system can do to protect victims. Before the first snap of football season, get everything you need to know with NBC News' NFL Kickoff Guide. Powered by the experts at NBC Sports, it's the easiest way to get up the speed on the team's players, stats, and biggest storyline shaping the season. Dive deeper into your favorite team with dedicated guides,

10:33plus data insights to help your fantasy line up too. It's the fastest route to being ready for football season. And it's only for NBC News subscribers. Just go to NBCNews.com slash NFL Guy. Two of your episodes that really stood out to me for talking season 34, Crystal Krueger and Megan Fox. Yeah. For people who maybe haven't seen those episodes, and I think probably those people have, but give us an overview of those, and then I want to ask you kind of more broadly about some of the systemic issues I think it brings up. Okay. Crystal Krueger was a mom and an engineer and a wife in the Denver area, killed by her stalker who she thought was her high school boyfriend, but who turned out to be her husband. And his motivation apparently is that she was going to leave him,

11:34and he thought that if he could make her afraid of this phantom stalker that he had created, that she would come back to him. And then when he realized that that wasn't going to work, and that in fact he was going to be found out, and then he would be on the losing side of what was going to be a lopsided divorce, then he felt that he had no choice but to kill her. That story is interesting because police in Brumfield, Colorado, which is just that side, Denver had written search warrants for the phone and internet companies that this phantom stalker was using to contact Crystal. So they'd written warrants for phone and internet and text companies trying to figure out where this guy was and where these texts were coming from. And that information was not made available until the day that Kristiel was murdered in her garage.

12:37Then the police department went back to those companies and said, now we have not just a stalker, but a killer on the loose, and we need that information right away. And it arrived within hours, making it clear that that information could have been provided before she died. And if that information had been provided, she almost certainly would have thrown her husband out of the house, changed the locks, taken it. She certainly wouldn't have allowed him to stand behind her in the garage, which is where he was when he murdered her. So that made Kristiel's family through their grief. Her cousin Becky, who was a domestic violence prosecutor, began lobbying the Oregon State Legislature where she lived to pass a law called Kristiel's Law. And they did pass it. And it's now on the books in Oregon. And it requires that in stalking cases, there is a very short clock on companies

13:41that receive law enforcement search warrants to respond with that information. And that is a wonderful development. And I look forward to it expanding to all 50 states. And the fact that we played anywhere on that at all is wonderful. That is that was Kristiel's family at work. The Morgan Fox episode was in the Ken Ohio area. She was being stalked by someone at work. All these people worked at FedEx in a packaging facility. And he murdered his co-worker, who he was clearly obsessed with. And she merely saw him as a friend. So one of those is sort of workplace stalking. And the other one is sort of a more traditional form of stalking. I ended up doing a lot of work on stalking because of those two cases. And I didn't know this before we started down the Kristiel Crew story road, which is that stalking is not even a felony in about half the states in the United States.

14:42It's about where domestic violence was, about 30 to 40 years ago, which is that frequently the response from the criminal justice system is, you better stop doing that. But when you think about the cases that you have covered, when you look at statistics today, the CDC says one in five women in the United States have experienced. And this is as of 2024 have experienced some sort of stalking incident in their lifetime. It amounts to like 22.8 million women in this country alone. And then you think that's just the ones that are reported. Correct. A lot of people when you talk to people who have experienced this will say they feel like if I go report nothing will be done. And then maybe the person who's doing it is going to get mad. Maybe the situation will get worse. And as we know from domestic violence, much more attention and much more severe penalties are required than just essentially saying, you stop doing this, don't make me come back here. But stalking requires a concerted, deliberate effort and series

15:48of efforts to do something. And so much of it now has moved from parking across the street to somebody's house to online. And the laws need to reflect that. And they need to reflect how closely stalking is frequently followed by other crimes, many of which are significantly more violent, dangerous and frightening. And so like we're kind of at the infancy of things evolving with that. But that is the thread that unquestionably connects both of those cases. And unfortunately I guarantee you we're going to be doing more. You talk about it being kind of in the infancy, in its infancy, at least legally speaking. But I look back, I think 1990 in California, you had one of the first anti-stocking laws passed. It was considered landmark legislation. It came after a series of high-profile murders that had come from a stalking situation and or attempted murders. And essentially what that law did at the time and essence was it said, okay, there are some behaviors that maybe individually will not amount to a crime.

16:50But if there is a pattern, that's something that could be criminally prosecuted. And the idea behind that law was saying the pattern may be changes things. When you think about the legislation that was passed in the 90s, that has looked at and often framed as these landmark moments, legally speaking, do you think they've done enough to change the course of what's happening? Clearly not. But you know, and as I said, it's got a, I mean, a lot of the laws that are on the book sort of don't reflect cyber stalking like at all. That's all changed with social media and the fact that everybody has a phone in their hand now. That, I mean, that's a whole other aspect of this. But no, I mean, I remember when I, when I was a local news reporter in Los Angeles, an actress named Rebecca Schaefer had been murdered by this guy who got her address from the DMV and came to her door and killed her. And one of the laws that was changed was all that is you can't get that kind of information. But like that's, that's a, that was a great start, but it didn't go much beyond that. So I mean, you know, for example, on the search warrant thing,

17:53phone internet and text companies will tell you, we get thousands of requests from law enforcement all the time. And we do not have the personnel to answer all of those search warrants. And we generally rely on law enforcement to tell us which ones are urgent and which ones are not. And of course, the other thing is that law enforcement has figured out that if you say it's urgent, you're going to get the results back quicker. So that, that, you know, like it's not always as urgent as maybe they make it sound. So the, the idea of crystal law, which, which would be great if it were expanded nationally is that in stocking cases, it requires a much more immediate response by the tech companies than has previously existed. And again, you're working a, a 30 year cold case homicide. It might not matter as much if you get the phone records back today as opposed to getting them tomorrow. But it does matter in a stocking case. When we come back, Josh answers some questions from the audience,

18:55including one about his good friend, Keith Morrison. We have Mike stands if people want to start lining up to ask any sort of question. There's a question. Oh, we have a great question. Could you tell Keith how much we miss him here at GrimeCon? I will, I will, I will, you mean you mean he heard a crime come? I would miss him a lot. Yes, I'll tell him. He's, he's, he's definitely going to be on plenty of stories in the next few months. But I, I will tell him that he needs to come to GrimeCon. A quick question for you. I have a friend whose daughter was murdered and could use some direction from an advocate to advocate for his own daughter's case. How would I get in touch with, or he get in touch with Tori's mom? Tori Van Oswell. Yeah. Dana Eras is her name, H-E-R-R-R-O-Z. You know, Dana, Dana read like 50 books about how to survive, like, about recovering from grief.

20:00But none of them were about dealing with violent loss. They were all about like, you know, what if, you know, a family member of yours dies and a, you know, from illness or a car accident or something. And, and so she, she contributed to one. There's a book on Amazon called The Murder Survivors Handbook. I'm sure you can find it elsewhere, but it is on Amazon. And that's been useful for a lot of people. Okay, great. Thanks. Yeah. I'm gonna go over here. Yeah. Oh, hello. Hey, Josh. All right. I'm Keith Sharon, the host of The Murder on Music. Oh, yes. I guess. You and I worked on a case, a similar case in Southern California about the death of Kathy Torres. And I thought it might be good for you to illustrate the links of advocacy that her mother Mary Bennett went. Yeah, I mean, that's a perfect example is what Mary Torres went through. She was pretty sure, I think, she knew what had happened. I mean, she wasn't just, she wasn't just advocating the law enforcement, like, get to work or work harder.

21:04She was like, no, no. This is who it is. Let's, let's focus on that. And got a job at the police department. Right. And they had to stare at her every day at the desk next to the chief of police. Right. Yeah. And then literally, like, came inside the building, which is just an amazing thing. Good to see you. Nice to see you. Thank you. Yeah. Go ahead. Hello. I'm Stacy with womenit and horror.com. And I have a question that I think the answer is yes, but I have to ask, Josh, have you seen the Bill Hader impersonation of you? There's an impersonation of you. Yeah, I saw it. So the day that it happened, we heard sort of through, like, back channels that, like, you know, you guys should watch Kimmel tonight. Right. And we, I guess, Kimmel staff must have called or somebody at ABC did, ABC Entertainment. So I was told you have to watch, but I didn't know why.

22:05So then I saw it the night in air. And I was like, it was incredible. Also, I would have told you that you couldn't imitate Dennis, but his imitation of Dennis was so great. So, so yeah, now people have sent that to me, like, a thousand times, because every time it reruns, people think it's the first time. Right. And they say you're seeing it. They're like, I have. Yeah. So, so yeah, it's amazing. Yes, I've seen it. I've seen it a lot of times. I've never met Bill Hader. And, you know, there's this kind of, like, sort of unspoken rule in Los Angeles, which is where I live. And I think where he lives, that, you know, you know, sort of go bother people like that, like, if they're, you know, you see him in a restaurant or something like that. But if I do, I do ever see him, I'm going to have to, like, interrupt his dinner. Oh, you've got to. Yeah. I'm going to be like, I can't not thank him for that. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah, just really quick. I was just wondering, I know you do some cases where there's, like, law changes because of something that happened to somebody.

23:10But do you ever go back many years later as investigative reporters and follow up to see, like, what, what did change? Because I'm thinking of a particular case that, from my neighborhood, that was covered that nothing did change. And I don't know, like, I would like to see like many 10, maybe 10, 15 years later, go back and, like, okay, what was missed here, you know? We've done that on podcasts. And if you're a premium subscriber on podcast, you can listen to a thing called After the Vertict, which is updates on stories that we've done. We're not just what people are doing, but exactly things like that, like, what came of this, this issue that we brought up in a story. Okay, thank you very much. Thank you. This feels a good place to talk about Ellison's podcast, Video Podcast, which is on Netflix, which is something you should all be checking out. I have already watched it and found it kind of hypnotic.

24:11Thank you. So, yeah, that's another, I already, like, appointment viewing in my house. And it's called Allegedly. And so I'm sort of looking forward to seeing where that goes. And I'm also looking forward to finding the right case where I can... I know, I really want to cross over up. Yeah, yeah, I want that to. I've asked repeatedly. Yes. So now that I have you saying in front of people, they can view it. Definitely. Everybody help me remember this. I know, we're going to find the case, but I'm going to be on there with her. Thank you guys. Well, that said for Talking Deadline for this week, but getting ready for my new podcast series before and after with Lester Holt that drops later this month. Starting on September 14th, I'll be talking to Jeremy Renner, Colin Kaepernick, Gabby Giffords, and more about the moments that change their lives forever. And their resilience and the face of the unimaginable.

25:11For early access, subscribe to Date Line Premium. Thanks everybody for listening. And remember, if you have any questions about our stories or about anything else you can write to us on social media at At Date Line NBC. You can also leave us a voice mail at 212-413-5252 for a chance to be featured right here on Talking Deadline. You can also watch the video version of Talking Deadline. Well, not this one, but most episodes on Peacock or YouTube. Or you can subscribe to the NBC News app. The world sees us as heroes, but they don't know what the job really costs. One family of federal agents. It's one thing to put yourself in danger. It's different when it's your family. Balance is duty to their country. The assassin is still out there. Stop! And each other.

26:11How do you protect the world and the people you love at the same time? Every case, it's home online of fire, premiering Monday September 21st on NBC.