The Financial Blockage That Almost No One Talks About (Your Relationship to What You Want)

In today's world, money is the main method people use to get the things that they want and need.

Because of this, we tend to immediately jump to the conclusion that the reason that we aren't

getting what we want is that we have a financial issue. In other words, that our problem is directly

related to money and our relationship with money itself. But what if I told you that your financial

issues may not have anything to do with your finances or money? What if instead it had to do with

your relationship to the thing that you want? Do me a favor and think about the thing that you

want or need, the thing that you think that you need money to get. Now, go ahead and take money

out of the middle so that your face to face in a very raw way with the thing that you want.

What is the pain about? How do you feel towards this thing emotionally? What painful thoughts arise?

It is in these painful thoughts and feelings that you can recognize what within you is

oppositional to the having of the thing that you want. So that you can grasp this concept,

I'll give you two examples. Kevin has been trying desperately to work his butt off at a job

so that he can climb the ladder of success and set himself up in life. No matter how hard he works,

things keep happening that prevent this from happening. He wants to have an income that's high

enough to be able to buy a house and a good car and to be able to provide for himself and a partner.

Why does he want this? Because Kevin really, and I mean really wants a woman in his life as a

life partner, he has identified finances as the necessary way to get this. Upon hearing the idea

that maybe his financial blockages are not about finances, but rather about his relationship to

the thing that he wants, he mentally takes finance out of the middle. So he's face to face with

his relationship to the thing that he wants, which is a female partner. And immediately his heart

sinks. He feels despair and doom. He hears the thoughts, no woman wants to be with a guy that

doesn't have his life together. And no woman is going to want to be with me. Beneath all of this,

is that Kevin feels the thing he wants will not want him. What this points to is that beneath

all of this is terrible self-esteem. What is blocking Kevin's abundance is not finances or blockages

about money. It is his belief that he is undesirable as a person. And so resolving this will do far

more regarding Kevin's abundance than focusing on finances or his mentality around money ever will.

Carmen has recently been putting a lot of time into watching financial experts talk about money

and investment strategy. She wants wealth. When she thinks about it, what she really wants wealth

for is a sense of freedom and personal power. She cannot stand it when she is forced to put up with

things that don't feel good just because she doesn't have the money. She hates that feeling

of powerlessness within human society and powerlessness to having the experiences that she

wants. She also loves that sense of freedom where you can do whatever you want and go wherever you

want and get whatever you want. When Carmen takes money out of the position of being the middleman

and is forced to face her relationship to freedom and her relationship to personal power.

You know, the things that she thinks that money is going to get her. Suddenly so many

oppositional patterns become obvious. One, her identity is completely wrapped up in being part

of the Mexican-American culture. Financial struggle and powerlessness is part of her cultural

identity. Suddenly she is afraid that having freedom and power and money for that matter would

change her identity in scary ways. Who would she be? Two, she realizes that her primary protection

strategy is to act small and helpless. This makes people step in and protect her and help her.

It disarms them. She realizes that having power makes her feel really unsafe because power

causes people to see who is a threat and treats you like one. Three, she realizes that personal

freedom feels sinful and morally dangerous because she was raised Catholic and was indoctrinated

with the belief that one should of course place God before their own self-interest, even if it means

self-sacrifice and suffering. Four, she realizes that as much as she is desperate for it, freedom

makes her feel like she has no safety net in life. Total freedom means that she is solely

responsible for her life, both for the getting of what she wants and for the failures and mistakes

she makes. This feeling feels like pressure and she's observed herself going back into the

security yet constraint of making other people responsible for her. It's as if she needs an

authority figure to feel safe in the world. What is blocking Carmen's abundance is not finances

or blockages about money. It's her relationship to personal power and freedom. And so resolving

this will do far more for her abundance than focusing on finances or her financial blockages

ever will. You might just notice by doing this that you are so stuck on finances as being the

only way that the thing you want or need can come to you, that even though you see finances as

the way to get what you want, you actually see finances as the barrier to getting what you want.

As the oppositional force to getting what you want. So on a subconscious level and energetic

level, you see finances as the bad guy and are in fact pushing against it. This mentality is a

pretty serious financial blockage in and of itself. The best place to start when it comes to taking

money as the middleman out of the equation is to sit as if in meditation and bring the image or

idea of what you want into your conscious awareness. You know the thing you think you want money

to get, right? Just observe your reaction. Pay close attention to your physical, emotional,

and mental reaction. When you first just think about the thing that you're wanting. And second,

when you think about already having the thing that you want. When any negative emotions or

uncomfortable sensations arise, see if you can identify them and see if you can identify any

negative thoughts, especially associated with them. Some things that you can consider when examining

your direct relationship to what you want. You know the thing you think you need money to get

are the following. Looking back at the last three times that you were close to getting this

thing that you want. Can you identify any patterns regarding what you think prevented you from

really getting it? Keep in mind that if the same external obstacle shows up, it can often point

to an internal defense mechanism that is masquerading as bad luck. If you were to watch yourself

in your life from the outside as if watching a movie character in a movie, what would you say

is preventing them from getting what they want? Also, what would you say about their relationship to

what they want if you're watching them from the outside? What was your relationship with this

thing that you want in childhood? What attitude do your parents, other authority figures, maybe even

siblings and peers have towards this thing that you want? Also, what is their relationship to it

themselves and what is their relationship to you having it? What attitude did your culture of

origin have to this thing that you want and what relationship did your culture have to you having

the thing that you want? Are there any traumas that you've experienced relative to this thing that

you want and do those experiences actually feel resolved or do they still feel unresolved?

If they're unresolved in what way? Are you using this thing that you want to try to get away from

something? If you wanted this thing so you never felt a certain way ever again, what might this

point to you desperately trying to avoid? Answer this question too. The thing I am afraid I would

have to become to get fill in the blank with what you want is what attitude do the people you

currently spend time with or does the culture you currently live in have towards this thing that

you want? If money can't be the answer and you were to ask yourself the question, why don't I

already have this thing that I want? What answer immediately and spontaneously comes up?

If you were to ask yourself the question, what is the thing that I want's relationship to me?

What answer immediately and spontaneously comes up? How might having this thing that you want

change your identity, especially in scary ways? When you ask yourself the question,

what bad thing will happen as a result of me getting fill in the blank with what you want?

What answer immediately and spontaneously comes up? If you had the thing that you want,

what would be the biggest risk? Now complete this sentence. If I had fill in the blank with what

you want, the price I would have to pay for it is, if you knew you didn't have this thing you

want because you didn't deserve it, what would be the reason that you don't deserve it? And what would

you have to do in order to deserve it? When you think about getting the thing that you want,

do you run up against any feelings or thoughts regarding your own capability or competence?

Complete this sentence. If I stopped struggling for the thing that I want, I would have to face

fill in the blank. When you watch every single thing that you do over the course of an entire day

and over the course of a whole week, how much of the things that you do directly serve the

getting of the specific thing that you want? And when you examine what you get out of doing

each thing that you do, can you identify something that you are subconsciously far more committed to

than the thing that you say that you want? This may take some reflections, some soul searching,

some being with uncomfortable emotions and some deep inner questioning, but improving your

relationship directly with the thing that you want tends to do more for unblocking financial

blockages, more for your abundance overall, and more for the getting of what you are actually

wanting than focusing on money ever will. Despite it being the financial blockage that almost

no one talks about, have a good week.