The Gentleman From Hell |S2 (Part 1) | Ep. 10

Greetings Gentleman and Gentle Ladies from Hell.

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Howdy, howdy ho and welcome to fantasy fanfellas.

I'm Hayden, producer of the fantasy fangirls podcast and your resident lover of all things

Sanderson.

And I'm Steven, your bookish internet goofball, but you can call me the smash daddy.

And we are currently deep diving Brandon Sanderson's fantasy epic Mistborn.

But here's the catch.

Steven here has not read Mistborn before.

That's right.

Hey, hey.

So each week you'll get my unfiltered raw reactions to every single chip.

And along the way, we'll do character deep dives, magic explainers, and Steven will

even try to guess what's next.

Spoiler alert.

It'll be wrong.

News flash.

I'm never wrong.

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Alright, she's coming.

Take it easy.

Steady.

Steady.

He's up.

He's gonna run around.

He's up.

It'll hold.

Just don't drag it along this side.

I think that did it.

She's cleared the hole.

Jesus.

There she is.

There you go, easy does it.

Just sit it there.

I'm not so easy.

Okay, let's get her all unhoved and wrapped up before the store really picks up.

I have to admit, it certainly doesn't look like what I'm at home.

Kind of looks...

I don't know.

Alien?

Yes.

Ah.

That's...

Ah.

That's...

That's...

I can't stop it.

I can't stop it.

I'm going to give it to you.

I'm going to give it to you.

I just want to see you.

Well, I can't say for sure, but I'm pretty confident there's nothing like these machines

on record.

The closest thing that could even come close would be the antichythera mechanism, circa

150 to 100 BCE.

It's often described as the world's first analog computer.

It was a Greek device discovered in a ship rack in 1901.

It contains a complex system of interlocking bronze gears designed to predict astronomical

positions and eclipses, decades and advance.

However, before we begin to counter respective chickens, we should realize that while those

structures do indeed appear to be machines, they may be something else entirely.

I agree, but judging by these wire-like structures, I'd say there's more than fair

chance they're machines, not debris, not ornamentation, machines that once hardness conducted

some form of energy.

I'm no expert, but dangerously braided metal filaments into liberty, repeating patterns

suggest sophisticated manufacturing.

They imply a level of technological achievement that should have been utterly alien to the

era.

About that, the era.

I'm sure we're all curious if the alleged machines were placed down there at some later

date, and technology of some level of complexity was present, but from the characters etched

into the metal, and the comparative levels of erosion, I'd say those things have been

down there since roughly the same time the temple sank into the sea.

And then there's this thing.

Almost looks like a giant compass.

Do we want to open the inner chamber?

Or should we wait till we get into the cleaner room?

Well, best to wait, I think.

Maybe there's some trace of whatever it used to contain.

Well, despite technical and meteorological complications, I'm happy to announce that

the monolith is free of the ice.

Ah, nice!

I can't wait to get over there and take a look.

Well, I just wish it felt like more of an accomplishment.

Those machines of yours pretty much stole the show.

I think that remains to be seen.

The tower is refused with wiring for the machines.

If the devices were designed in accordance with the tower's overarching purpose, to invoke

some semblance of a myth-fitting home, then it stands to reason that a spy may have received

special attention, as was the case with the other two towers we know of.

Perhaps to spy on how there's more secrets than we first surmised.

You do realize how scary a thought that is, right?

That these machines might have been designed to somehow interact with some other reality.

I mean, I don't very much do succeed it, or that it was some kind of hell.

But the mere fact that they break the bell curve will all of a sudden be possible, then,

it's, well, spooky.

Is that a conflict I hear?

Is there any sign that things are still active?

What the captain said earlier, that the machines might be responsible for all the weirdness

that's been going on, given the magnitude of what those machines represent, I'd say

just about anything on the table.

I was getting some decent interference in my end while I was down there.

More than I would have expected.

And the footage from the drone was less than ideal.

The drones were picking up slightly higher levels of electromagnetic radiation, but nothing

off the charts.

There's anybody there.

Come in.

Go ahead, Bert.

I hear you.

The storm is really picking up now, so you science folks need to figure out where your

shelter in, and the ship or at the outpost.

Once this thing's in full swing, you're going to be stuck there for the duration.

And if it's not the ship, then I recommend beating feet over to the glorious ASAP.

Things are getting pretty bad out here.

I'll be finishing my rounds soon.

After that, you're going to be on your own to get across the rope lines.

Roger that, Bert.

I'm heading over to Burreus in just a few if you can wait up for me.

We'll do.

Just hurry the hell up or her and out.

He's always a pleasure to talk with.

Well, you heard him.

It's either here or back to the outpost.

I'm no fan of this ship, so.

I'm out.

Anyone coming with?

Well, I'm a big city gal, so I'm headed out with you.

I think I could speak for both of us.

We're headed to the outpost.

We've had more than our fill of this tub.

Generally, I can sleep anywhere.

Boats included.

What's the accommodations here are a little too slim, even for me.

I can't help but agree with the rest of you.

All right, let's do it up and get well again as good.

I think that if I've does it, Bert, old place is pretty well buttoned up.

Aye.

She should be old good to go.

Wait, I forgot about that big industrial auger in the storage depot.

Someone left it leading into the corner.

I should probably lay it down in case the wind starts shaking the place.

Don't need a crash into the floor.

More importantly, I don't want to come in out of my way.

I don't think you make enough in three paychecks to cover that thing.

Now let's get it done quick.

Sure thing.

All right, it's right here.

I just think you all the other end of it.

All right, full set.

Just ease our day.

One, two.

One, two.

Whoo!

That did it.

Oh, what the hell did I knock over?

Relax.

It's just a glass jar.

Your paychecks will leave to see another day.

What the hell's in it?

What's that?

Now you're clippings and...

Hey.

Aye.

That's what it looks like all right.

What a hell would someone want to keep that in it?

Yeah, got me.

Probably part of one of the science team's little experiments.

Best to put it back, where are we found it?

I don't know.

I don't know.

I don't know.

I don't know.

I don't know.

I don't know.

But remember, it's still pretty dark.

What are we found it?

Hello, I'll tell you.

I'm sure being glad we finally get the hell out of here.

Still freaked out about that, shit from...

It'll be enough for us.

I don't even want to talk about it.

Bad enough it happened in the first place.

We don't need to keep bringing it up.

Hey, Bernie.

We're all coming across the road lines,

but they're all tangled up and buried.

We can use a hand coming across.

We can barely see where we are! Over!

Roger that. Me and Jacob are on the way. Just a put till we get there.

Roger that! Thanks, Bird.

I come on. Let's go help the egg heads up with a snow. Right behind you.

Captain, the instruments are off the charts. Air temperature is minus 45 degrees Celsius. Wind speeds are sustained at 75 knots with gusts over 90.

Visibility is effectively zero. It's a complete whiteout. The barometric pressure is dropping faster than I've ever seen.

This could turn ugly before it's over. We're snug in the ice pack for now. But we'll need constant monitoring throughout the storm.

No one moves until it passes. I want consistent updates from Boris.

Yes, sir.

To be honest, I'd much prefer a good honest storm to what we've been having to put up with.

Captain, we're getting something on the radio, but it's fine.

Eh, put it on speaker.

Two more.

No more.

Fuck it.

I'm getting old.

Yes, sir.

Shit.

What the hell is going on?

What are you doing?

That old sister, can you hear me?

The terrible things are coming for you.

Just fight big game for me.

You too will know the stinging cold of their touch.

Colder than the night you remember.

Colder than the night you tried to forget.

You won't see them at five.

You'll only feel less.

Ah, slow, heking emptiness.

I'll be with you behind.

When the cold flies through,

circles and all kinds of shit.

When you begin to understand.

What a benton man truly is.

Don't be afraid.

I will be there in the dark.

I've been waiting for you.

You're loving brother.

Shut the end of!

That will be enough of that.

The storm is likely scrambling our reception again.

Yes, sir.

Forever.

They go over for me.

I'll be right back.

Yes, sir.

Jesus, what the hell was that?

Is that Russian?

All bad Blizzard's look the same.

Pure white stretching as far as the eye can see.

I suppose we won't truly know how bad it is until it's over.

Hopefully, I won't be as severe as they're predicting.

What do you think?

Will we be buried for our next millennia or not?

Why it?

Or even listening to me?

Honey, come here.

Look at this.

Okay, why am I looking at exactly?

This is the initial drone footage we took of the ruins.

See right there?

Those are more of the wire structures we collected.

They just looked like tendrils of seaweed and whatnot when I first saw them,

but now I know better.

They extend off the seam out until they're straight down and out of sight.

I'm beginning to wonder if they lead to whatever once powered them.

If anything did it all.

Who's to say it isn't still powering them?

It's far too early to do anything but speculate, of course, but.

But what if that black substance, combined with the geothermal venting,

was being harnessed as some kind of energy source?

It's a staggering thought, but all the strange phenomena we've witnessed

could very well be the byproduct of whatever those machines were designed to do,

just like the captain suggested.

Well, I think you're right.

It's so little early to speculate.

Those machines, those structures may well be advanced for their time,

but you're kind of going hog wild over what they might be capable of, aren't you?

We really have no idea.

For all we know, they could be ornamental,

and what we've been calling wire,

and it might just be some expression of art or culture

that only appears more advanced than it should be.

We arrive and encounter strangeness on every front.

Environmental, technological, chemical, even psychological.

And then, right at the center of it all,

we discover hidden ruins housing near the prehistoric machines,

machines that could very well still be active.

Should I say all of that lines rather neatly?

Or you'd like it to align rather neatly.

I must freaked out by what's happening as you are.

But I don't think we should be jumping to any conclusions just because we're scared.

That's fun.

I do think you're right to be excited to see where all that wiring leads us.

A legend wiring, I mean.

Look, I know we've both been through a lot this year.

But if all goes the way we want,

we stand a good chance of writing the boat.

And which boat would that be?

Look, the doctor said that there's still a chance.

And if there's not, we're just wasting time.

Time we could be spending raising a child, a family.

You know I'm not against adoption.

I just prefer it was ours.

Something we made together.

And if there's still a chance, well, I'd like to take it.

You know I'm a sucker for you, right?

That's why I married you.

Is there any more of that gunk on it?

No, I had the crew clean it off.

We had more samples of the stuff than we needed.

So I had them disposed of what was removed.

She's all cleaned up and ready for company.

Am I ever going to get my own kids at the storage bay?

Don't worry, I've got it in my pocket.

I just wanted to see your face when you saw it.

That's fine with me.

After all that's been going on, I could use the company.

Speaking of which, are you ever going to tell me what happened between you and girls?

No.

Well, thanks.

I appreciate all the nuance and subtlety.

You asked and I answered.

Fair enough, I guess.

And here we are.

Let's prepare yourself.

I kind of guessed.

The sign taped to the door that says monolith kind of gave it away.

And there she is in all her glory.

Well, you really weren't kidding when you said I looked alien, were you?

I do tend to take my job pretty seriously, so.

Thank you.

Well, now that I'm looking at it, I can safely say that I've never seen anything remotely like it.

Not even the Oduly Architecture is as bizarre as this.

Did it come out completely intact or were there any remnants or debris left behind in all?

Nothing, it came out fully intact.

Alright, I guess it's time to get down to business.

Well, that's my cue to leave.

If you need anything, just give me a hollow on the radio.

Thanks.

We'll do.

All this time and I haven't so much just touched my phone.

I'm sure this must be a record.

Personal best.

Okay, let's get to work.

The structure appears to be composed of an as yet undefined material.

It does resemble metal, at least superficially, though it doesn't match any known alloy I'm familiar with.

The markings and design flourishes are unmistakably methodical in character, though they feel older somehow.

I'm proud of it again, perhaps.

What's troubling is the precision of the carvings.

They're too exact, too consistent, suggesting a level of tooling or technology that simply shouldn't exist within the accepted timeframe.

Well, I wondered when my fellow archaeologist might arrive.

Is this your first time seeing it, too?

I can't say that it is, but it's still a sight to see regardless.

Now that we've seen the wiring from the ancient machines in the drone footage, I'm beginning to suspect that the filament-like structures we first detected in the monolith scans may be part of the same network.

If that's true, it would suggest the monolith could be at least partially mechanical.

Mechanical, yes.

There's such a simple concept might feel to properly describe the scope of such a technology.

But technology brought us far back a 6,000 years ago to say nothing of its intended purpose, and whether or not it succeeded at said purpose.

Really, Miles? Are you suggesting the machine's facilitated communication with a methodic in hell?

I think now that we've actually stumbled upon something genuinely...

I suppose you'd call it crypto-technological.

You feel the need to push the boundaries even further, just to stay one step ahead of everyone else?

I suppose.

But if such a technology had succeeded, perhaps you might be able to converse with those parents of yours.

Ask them why they abandoned you to the streets.

What the hell did you just say?

After all, it's likely your abandonment is one drove you into that youthful life of crime and violence.

I wonder how many young girls would have died had the fire you set in the basement been allowed to sprint?

Or perhaps you required no such catalyst for your atrocities?

Perhaps they were always there, coiled within you?

Could that be why they left you behind?

Because even then, they sent something rotten at your core.

How? How do you know all of that? I'm not...

I'm not that person anymore.

No, perhaps you've only tricked yourself into thinking so.

And all you wanted academic accomplishments had nothing but a disguise.

A disguise to enable even more de-ablory.

What? No! You're a liar! Fuck you, Miles! You have no right to talk to me like this!

I don't. What need I, with rights, will not have access to the sins of every lost one of them?

No! No!

What? Where are you, Miles? What just happened?

What just happened?

I must be hallucinating. Just like everyone else. That has to be it. That has to be it. Right?

Who is it?

It's a Vanessa. I need to talk to you.

All right. Just give me a second.

Come right in. My goodness. Whatever's wrong, you look like you've seen a ghost.

Were you just in the storage bay, where the model is? Why are you so angry?

Answer me, were you or not?

No, I was not. Now, calm yourself and tell me what's wrong.

I'm sorry. It's just...

Just what? I'd like to think we're friends, Vanessa. If there's some kind of problem, you can tell me.

I don't know what happened. I suppose it could have been something like you and everyone else have been experiencing.

You mean the electromagnetic induced hallucinations?

Please, Miles. I'm not in the mood.

Well then, perhaps you're finally in the mood for what I have to say.

Yeah, and what's that?

Why don't you have a seat and allow me to make you a drink?

Why? What do you know, Miles?

Vanessa, I'm new Christopher Darrow.

The gentleman from hell is a meltopia production.

Today's episode was written by Mark Anselon, invoiced by Harper Takent,

Kalefi Forest, Mithin Mk, Gerald Hale, Matt Van Hove,

Honey Nguyen, Gina Smith, Steven Zivik, Trenton Butt, Jesse Van Hove, Aubrey Acres,

Jesse Van Hove, Lou Sutcliffe, and Alex Patenko.

Sound editing was completed by Steven Anselon, and script editing was conducted by Walker Cornfeld.

Be sure to check us out at www.meltopia.com and follow us on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter at Meltopia.

And for more exclusive content such as additional lore, stories, and art,

be sure to check out our Patreon at www.patreon.com forward slash Meltopia.

Guys, it's no use putting it off.

The best time for an underwear refresh is now.

Tommy John underwear is designed for a perfect fit that stays put all day.

There's zero shape thanks to four times more stretch than competing brands.

And their innovative horizontal quickdraw fly is a game changer.

With over 30 million pairs sold, there are thousands of men out there more comfortable than you.

Don't settle for less.

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That's TommyJohn.com slash comfort.

Tommy John, comfort perfected.

Howdy, howdy ho, and welcome to Fantasy Fanfellas.

I'm Hayden, producer of the Fantasy Fangirls podcast and your resident lover of all things Sanderson.

And I'm Steven, your bookish internet goofball, but you can call me the smash daddy.

And we are currently deep diving Brandon Sanderson's fantasy epic Mistborn.

But here's the catch.

Steven here has not read Mistborn before.

That's right. Hey, hey, so each week you'll get my unfiltered raw reactions to every single chapter.

And along the way we'll do character deep dives, magic explainers, and Steven will even try to guess what's next.

Spoiler alert, he'll be wrong.

Newsflash, I'm never wrong.

Episodes come out every Wednesday and you can find fantasy fanfellas wherever you get your podcasts.

Acast powers the world's best podcast.

Here's a show that we record.

Michael Garjulo stalked and slaughtered his female neighbors in LA in the 2000s until one survived.

She painted a picture that you could never imagine.

In a first on Mind of a Monster, we dive into a case that's still active.

Did Michael's murderous rampage start in the 1990s when he was just 17?

His impulsivity and his rage was starting to peak around that age.

Listen to Mind of a Monster, the Hollywood Ripper, wherever you get your podcasts.

Acast helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere.

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