When It Gets Hard: Powerful Motivation to Keep Going

0:00And I woke up in a hospital bed. A pair of eggs were pork. It said this. It said when they arrived on the scene, that there was only one person in the vehicle name. And that I hit the tree going to anywhere from 60 to 60 miles an hour. There was no brakes. I didn't even try to stop. And when I hit that tree, that case of beer bottles that was behind her. I had to pour it forward at impact. And they were woman neighbors who didn't ever seat belt on. I had to pour it forward at impact. And that thing called the windshield in your car. And that case of beer bottles met with Priscilla in the twin.

1:00And she slid down to the floorboard and her neck rested on the middle console. So I stayed up all night that night. You know what? The paper had read to life line in a serious accident. I took it to a part of your hospital. Nobody would tell me if she was alive, if she was dead. I had no idea. But I knew the paper said something that morning. And if she was alive or she passed away, the paper would probably say something the next morning. The paper man shows up at like 4 a.m. He comes driving by, everything slows down like a movie. He rolls the window and he throws the paper at its bone. I jump up, grab it, I rip it up in the rubber band, roll it open. And there's the headline. Prash, Vindom dies. At 23, the choice is in decisions that I made.

2:00Priscilla owns lost her life. She was a mother of two, she was a daughter, she was a sister. Never did I think when I was in the 56th, 7th, 8th grade that at 23 I'd be responsible for taking the life of somebody. What happened though is the family wanted me to contact them right after that. And I called and what do you say to that? You know what do you say I'm sorry? But I called and the family said Nathan, listen. Because Siddhu was sober, it was her vehicle. We can't put all the blame on you, which I didn't agree with. I was solely to blame. I was a driver. I don't care how drunk I was, it was my fault. But they said listen, there's no reason for two families to be destroyed. We want you to know that we, we love you, even though we don't know you, we forgive you, even though we don't know you. But do us a favor, just try to make the world a better place. Try to don't let Priscilla die for nothing.

3:01Just make a difference. I got 11 years in my prison sentence knocked off. 11 years. I left prison. And when I left there, I got a letter from the governor's office that said that this young man is his serious about his change and he's trying to overcome and he's impacting and inspiring. I got this letter, this paper that I left the prison. I was leaving the prison in St. Claude. 11 years early, I came home five years ago. Five years ago, I came home. And I was on a mission, man. And I was just a broke down dude that's just hungry and I refused to fail. I refused to give up. I may make mistakes. I may do it the wrong the first time, the second time. But failures only failure until you stop trying. Listen, some of you you're afraid and you're letting fear, whatever your dream, whatever your goal, whatever it is that you want to achieve,

4:02you're letting fear paralyze you. Listen to me, you're never going to know if you can swim unless you jump in the water. You're never going to know that you can achieve your dreams or you're going to fail unless you get into the water. That's when you're going to find out if you're sinking or you're swimming. And here's the truth, failures only failure until you give up, man. It doesn't, you don't have to get it right the first time. It's not about perfection. And so some of you maybe you've struggled and you've messed up and you're relapsed or you've made some hiccups and even some of us that are struggling with addiction, you've made some poor business choices. Some of some poor relational choices, you've struggled on telling you what. It's not about perfection. It's about progress. Keep putting one foot in front of the other. Giving up is not an option. Giving up on your loved ones is not an option. Giving up on your sobriety is not an option. It's not. I want you guys to understand you're in the game, man. You're in the game, man. We're in this together.

5:03I refuse to believe that addiction and living a life of drugs and bound to these thoughts and these failures is all that we have. It's not. I'm 10 years sober and I promise I don't want nothing. I'm not counting the days. I'm just tasting down my dream and I'm no different than anyone of you in here. You plus God is always the majority. Period. Good choices will always have good results. And I was making on a bad choices and on a bad decisions. And I was basing my value, my worth of your opinions. And I learned something. Listen to me. Everybody in here wants you to understand something. Your value is never based off any of the opinions of anybody in this room. Who cares what anybody thinks or says about you? They are not your merit system. They are not your system of worth. You are who you say you are by your actions.

6:08Put the choices and decisions that we make have consequences good or bad. When I went to prison, at 23 listen, I came from a broken family. I had been labeled and unmarked and identified. I had battled herds and pains and wounds. I had suicidal thoughts and I battled so far me. Drugs and alcohol consumed me. I lost all dreams and goals. I felt like I had made too many mistakes to change. Listen, I felt like I had every reason to see you know what life is too tough and I quit. I lived with these three principles and I promised you man. They will change everything about who you are. Hard work works, make good choices, good things happen and value people. I decided 10 years ago literally when this all happened and went to prison. I wanted to be, I was like you know what? I want to make this promise. I want to keep it to this family. I come from a lot of brokenness. I don't know where to start. But what I do know is the importance of the choices that I make. And so literally I wrote the word, changed the world and I slapped it on my little prison cell window.

7:12Every single day I woke up and I realized make good choices, great things happen. Aim small miss small. Make good choices, great things happen. You see every choice that I can make. Listen, I can't control what you think about me. I can't control your opinion of me. I can't control what you say about me. But I control how I react, respond to what I do with my life. I'm in control of my life. I don't let external factors control me. I'm in control of my life. Because sometimes life can be tough. Life can be challenging. And sometimes the obstacles in front of you seem like they're too big. It's easier to lay down with you. You know what I remember? I remember when my dad used to look at me when the kids said listen to Nathan. Life is never going to give you anything. But if you make it and if you build it, nobody can take it from you. Because hard work and tenacity and refusing to quit with chasing your dream, you'll get there.

8:12I promise you. Maybe you don't hit the start of the show and the moon. You don't just don't give up when you go after it. And you stop caring about the opinions of people around you. Stop blaming everybody from your hurts. Take ownership of your life. Take off your mask. Don't feed the bear. Make good choices. Be a best friend. Encourage somebody. Be a voice of hope and inspiration. This is your moment. You

9:32You